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Wilbur is very, very, conflicted. Prince Tommy, for all his theatrics, doesn’t actually care about his birthday. No, that’s a lie, Tommy loves the idea of his birthday. For weeks beforehand, he’ll offhandedly remind everyone around him that the anniversary of the day he was born is steadily approaching, then proceed to be away at a battle or a training camp of some sort on the actual day of. The events are so common, that it’s about three days before his birthday that Wilbur abruptly realises that Tommy will in fact be home for his birthday this year. They’re eating dinner together when he comes to that conclusion, as Tommy randomly points out “I’m so excited for my birthday!”
“That’s nice, Tommy.” Techno answers, missing the sad look on Tommy's face. It’s then Wilbur figures it out. It’s the first time in years Tommy will be home for his birthday. They’ll be able to give him something other than the handwritten letters they sent him, pieces of parchment paper easy to store in his pockets (easy to burn if things went sideways.)
Tommy leaves the table, saying something about heading to bed, and Wilbur looks up.
“Tommy’ll be home for his birthday this year. It’s in three days, right?” Wilbur says.
Tubbo nods. “We have to get him something good this year.” Tubbo adds seriously. “He deserves it.”
Techno’s face turns cocky. “I’ll have the best gift anyways. Everyone knows I know Tommy best.”
Wilbur laughs at his lighthearted jab. “I was thinking we could all work together and get him one big g-” Wilbur is interrupted by a thud on their wooden dining table. Tubbo had literally slammed his glass in disagreement.
“Your present would be the best? That’s funny.” Tubbo glares at his oldest brother. “We both know I know Tommy best, it’s only natural my gift will be the best.”
As a general rule, Tubbo isn’t very confrontational. He prefers to be in the shadows, and that very quality was what made him such a good spymaster. Wilbur was aware of this fact, and in essence, he was also aware there was one thing that riled him enough to become as bold as he was acting right now - Tommy. Rather, the topic of Tommy’s relationship with Techno.
Everyone in the castle knew how close Tommy and Tubbo were. Where there’s Tommy, there’s Tubbo, they say, and it’s true. The flash of Tommy’s red is followed by the joy of Tubbo’s green, like two peas in a pod, as their father would say. Everyone also knew that the relationship between Tommy and Technoblade was unlike any other. Techo and Tommy had a bond shared by only those who had fought together on the battlefield. Wilbur didn’t pretend to understand what they had gone through, but he knew the effects of war on people - even now he saw his father on his bed, head in his hands. Sobbing with no tears.
What was more lighthearted, was the petty rivalry that Tubbo and Technoblade has over their relationship with Tommy. Wilbur could sense an argument beginning at Technos condescending snort, and Tubbo’s huff in response. Wilbur didn’t mind not getting the best present, Tommy wasn’t that picky. But he knew that if he didn’t step in, the other two, jealous out of their minds, would find some way to ruin Tommy’s birthday. What did his brothers have in common, though, despite all their differences? Their royal status, and their love for competition.
“How about a bet.” Wilbur announces, and his brothers perk up. He knows exactly what to say to get them to listen. “All three of us compete to get Tommy the gift he likes the most.”
Techno pushes his cape off his shoulders and rolls back the sleeves of his silk shirt. He produces a piece of parchment out of thin air and motions to a servant theatrically, who somehow gets the message and brings a quill and ink on a gold tray. Techno certainly had a flair for the dramatic.
“We each put something on the line that’s important to us. Whoever gets him the best present gets to keep all three things - theirs, and the other two’s.” Tubbo tries to mask his impressed look on his face. Techno’s always been good at deals and contracts and such.
Tubbo takes out the chain he wears on his neck, the only actual identity of him he takes along on his spying missions. On the silver chain is a pendant of a bee, a gold charm that Tommy had gotten for Tubbo as a souvenir on a trip he had gone on. In the midst of war, Tommy had picked it up because it reminded him of Tubbo. “You sure you wanna bet that, Tubbo?” Wilbur asks, a tad unsure, but the younger boy sets his jaw.
“I won’t lose.” Techno, not one to back down at Tubbo’s reply,picks up his deep red cape off of the chair he hung it on. He throws it on the table beside Tubbo’s chain. Tommy had spent months looking for the right material for a cape when Techno’s had gotten too old. He had dyed it by hand, as a pet project, making it match the shade of red Tommy wore so often or “they could match.” Techno, for all his grumbling about sappy gestures, wore the cape almost everyday.
Wilbur couldn’t possibly match those, could he? His hands went to the cap on his head, his prized hat. Tommy had gifted it to him to keep his ears warm while he was writing. He gulps.
“The deal’s the deal.” Techno says, and Wilbur and Tubbo murmur it back. Wilbur doesn’t particularly care, he tells himself, but he sure as hell doesn’t want to lose his hat. Coupled with their royal status, the fact that they could ask for anything within their empire and get it with the snap of some fingers? This was sure to be interesting.
Phil, of course, chooses that charged moment to walk into the room. “What’s going on, guys?” He asks, looking at everyone confusedly. “What? Was the dinner that bad?”
Techno and Tubbo, for all their squabbling, only sigh.
Technoblade is very, very frustrated. You’d think having access to everything in the godforsaken empire would make finding a gift a bit easier, but he is most definitely struggling. The thing is, he’s a prince, but so is Theseus, like the servants insist on calling him. Tommy could just as easily ask for any of those things. And he knows that Tubbo’s going to do something ridiculously sappy, and Tommy will surely choose his gift.
He rubs his eyes on a sleepless night, scratching out hundreds of ideas on line parchment. He was going to find the best gift. He would do it no matter what. He finds Tubbo in the castle less often, no doubt foraging for something in the forest, or looking through the marketplaces for something that’ll satisfy Tommy. Techno is painfully aware of the fact there are only two more days till his birthday.
It’s not cheating if he simply asks Tommy what he wants? If he snoops a little with Philza to see if his father knows? It’s not. It’s not cheating, it’s simply taking advantage of all his...resources.
“Phil.” Techno says, barging into his room. Philza looks up, surprised.
“Techno...are you okay? You look stressed.” Philza replies, concerned. Barging into his father’s room isn’t entirely uncharacteristic, but Techno is sure he looks like a mess. He catches sight of himself in his father's mirror and blanches, his hair a tangle around his head, his crown lopsided. Techno straightens it a little, and turns back to his father.
“I’m freaking out, a little.” Techno admits. “I can’t figure out what to get Tommy for his birthday.”
“You know, your brother talked to me about the same thing a few hours ago.” Techno is a little relieved at that, he won’t lie. “I’ll tell you the same thing I told him - you and Tommy are more similar than you think.” So Philza wasn’t going to be helpful. Okay.
He thinks about it though, what Tommy might like, and he thinks back to a training session they had had a while back.
“That axe looks so cool!” Tommy had yelled excitedly, thrilled at the very look of the axe. Technoculd see the stars in his eyes. “Can I have it?”
“What? No.” Techno had laughed at Tommy’s pout. “The axe is special. Only the worthy can use it.”
“I’m worthy!” Tommy argues, but Techno just shook his head. “Does it have a name, at least?” He had asked then. Tommy had a thing for naming inanimate objects.
“No.” Techno said, and watched Tommy consider.
“The Axe of Peace.” Tommy said with grandiose and Techno laughed.
“That feels like an Oxymoron.” Techno snorted, but he smiled while Tommy complained about his “big words”. His younger brother had seen so many weapons, so much war. He had supposed it would be okay for one weapon to be a symbol of something else entirely.
Techno shakes his head, smiling at the memory. He digs through his weapons for a few hours, before stumbling upon it, the so-called Axe of Peace. He spends another couple of hours sharpening it, buffing it until it gleams. He can think of no one other than Tommy who is more worthy of the grand weapon.
Tubbo is very, very nervous. No, he’s excited for Tommy’s birthday but he’s also a ball of nerves. Tommy, if he notices, does not mention anything about Tubbo’s clearly erratic behavior. Yes, he’s nervous, but he’s also excited. Nervouscited? Was that a word? Tubbo was having trouble concentrating on anything other than Tommy’s present. He had asked Philza for help and the man had given him a non-committal answer and some gibberish about being like Tommy. He wasn’t like Tommy at all, that was what was so good about them. Tubbo made up for Tommy’s loud personality, Tommy filled in the gaps where Tubbo came off short.
What would Tommy like, he thinks frantically, what would Tommy say if I asked him what he wanted? Something silly like “women”, now that Tubbo thinks of it. He laughs out loud and continues searching the markets in the city, disguised in his civilian clothes.
The store owners know him, not as Tubbo, but as Toby, for the sake of appearances. He wonders, as a reflex, where Tommy is. It’s a joke between them, because they travel so much, Tommy off on a war of some sort, Tubbo spying for Philza.
“I want something for my friend.” he stutters to a store owner that has heard about his best friend so much. “But I have no idea what to get him.”
The store owner heads into the back for a few minutes, and comes out with a red velvety box. The fabric is plush, and inside it sit two delicate compasses, small enough to slip into his pocket. “They point to each other.” The store owner says quietly. “As long as both people hold it, they’ll always find each other again.”
Tubbo doesn’t hesitate when he says “I’ll take it.”
Wilbur hates calling people. It’s exhausting and he’d much rather be writing, but he remembers that Tommy had fixated on something back when he heard King Dream talking about, back when he had visited. A disk that Wilbur had composed years ago, of one of Tommy’s favourite songs. King Dream had the only one in existence, and it was part of a set of three specific ones.
“Hello?” A voice asked.
“I need to speak with the king.” Wilbur says quickly, he doesn;’t want to go through the back and forth with some random person.
The servant actually laughs. “Not just anyone is allowed to speak with the king.” They say, and Wilbur sighs.
“Could you tell him Wilbur rung, at least? He’ll know who I am. Or his knight, the short brown haired one. Either works.” He can hear the skepticism in the servant's voice when they agree, but he breathes a sigh of relief when they leave to find either of the two.
“Wilbur?” he hears the King’s knight ask, and he exclaims.
“George!” Thank god for competent servants. “Listen, I’m calling on business, Tommy’s birthday is in two days.”
“Oh?” George asks. “What do you need from us?”
“Well, you know that disk of mine, the purple record. The one I composed.” Wilbur knows it might be too much to ask. They’re literally some of the rarest items in the world.
“I’ll see what I can do.” George says, and Wilbur sighs happily.
“I'll send you the manuscript of my newest novel, as thanks.” He hears George’s whoop of excitement as he cuts the call.
He supposes George succeeded at convincing the king, when the record arrives at the Antarctic empire, with a gift from the King himself.
Tommy is very, very ecstatic. It’s his birthday, and he hasn’t spent it home in years. He knows Tubbo is up to something, but Techno and Wilbur have also been pretty quiet (as quiet as Techno can be. You know what Tommy means.)
“First we eat, then presents,” Philza warns, even though everyone is practically vibrating with excitement. They, despite the luxurious, long spread of foods they ordered for tommy’s birthday, eat faster than they ever have.
Philza goes first. “A new set of armor.” he says, and Tommy gasps with delight. He’d needed a new set, his old one was getting a bit small.
“Yes BIG MAN!” he yells in excitement, and throws his arms up in the air and hugs him. Philza laughs gently and hugs him back. Tommy looks at his brothers who are all fidgeting with their hands.
“It’s okay if you didn’t get me any-” he starts and they all protest.
“We just can’t decide who should go first.” Techno says gruffly, and Tommy cocks an eyebrow. “Everyone wants to be the first to give you their ‘better’ present.”
Tommy coughs, a little confused. “Uh, alright then. How about Wilbur, first?” he asks and he doesn;t miss the self satisfied smirk on Wilbur’s face.
“Well, Tommy, I brought you the disk .” He adds an inflection on the “disk” and as expected, Tommy literally brightens at the mention of the word.
“From King Dream? Wilbur, how?” He rips it out of the red tissue Wilbur wrapped it in and laughs giddily. “I can’t believe it!” he runs over to the jukebox they have mostly for decoration in the dining room, and places the disk in it. Everyone can’t help it, they smile at Tommy's joy.
“Thank you.” he says, his face serious, and Wilbur smiles. Tommy turns to his other two brothers. “I honestly don’t know how you two can top that-”
Tubbo and Techno both slam their gifts on the table, and begin speaking over each other.
“Well, I brought you this compass form that little store on the street down by the river, you know the one -”
“You know that axe you wanted, like six months ago, but then I said you weren’t worthy, and then-”
“Actually the store owner helped and they’re both a matching set and because we always ask where the other is-”
“We even named it together, do you remember that tTommy, and I felt guilty about saying you weren’t worthy, but at the time you weren’t but I think you’ve become worthy you know-”
“And I just think that it would be a nice reminder that we always have a way to lead back to each other-”
“Guys, relax.” Wilbur interrupts their spiels. Tommy looks down at each of the gifts, tears in his eyes.
His finger traces the axe. “The Axe of Peace.” He says softly, and Techno tears up at the way his younger brother’s voice cracks a little.
“You really think I’m worthy?” He asks Technoblade, the blood god, the greatest warrior of their time, and the pink haired man nods. “Thank you, Techno.” he says, and picks up one of the two compasses in the box. “They point back to each other.” Tommy marvels, and Tubbo, despite himself, beams.
“You’ll always know where I am.” He says, and Tommy bounds across the room to embrace his brother. “It’s amazing. Thank you.”
“Better than women?” Tubbo asks, laughing through his tears. Tommy makes a scandalised face, laughing too.
“Nothing’s better than women.” he says and they all laugh. Tommy is about to suggest they do an activity of some sort together, when a servant whispers something in Wilbur’s ear. He jumps up, snapping his fingers, as if he remembered something important.
“Oh, right!” He says. “Tommy, King Dream sent something for your birthday.”
The box that King Dream sent is an obnoxious shade of green, covered in smiley faces that resemble his ceremonial mask. Tommy scoffs. Even on his birthday, Dream is a self obsessed bastard.
Inside the box, which is far too big for what it holds, are a few tickets on a ship to his country. A card inside reads, “You should come visit, Theseus.” Tommy whoops with excitement.
“Vacation!” he yells, and puts the tickets back in the box. “This was the best gift ever! My favourite! Dream can be good sometimes.” He laughs and runs off to begin packing his bags, or something. His three other brothers sit, dumbfounded.
“D-did he say, his favourite?” Techno asks.
“The bet is off.” Tubbo says, grabbing a random snack from the table. He bites it frustratedly.
His brothers, for all their competitiveness, don’t disagree.