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letters to l'manberg

Summary:

A collection of letters sent between soldiers on opposing sides of the war

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Hello, Tubbo.

Wilbur said that I should start writing to you, he said that it would make me feel better. I miss you a lot, way too much, big man. I know that it's probably a lot harder for you, since you're actually the one back home, but still. It's hard for me, too. I really hope that you're doing okay, even if you probably aren't. I honestly don't even know if you'll get these letters, but I really hope that you do. I want you to know that I'm still here, yeah? We're still together. It's always been me and you against everyone else (against that green bastard), and I think that that's how it's going to stay. If you get these, can you write back to me? I just want to make sure that you're doing okay. 

There hasn't been a lot happening recently, I guess. Pogtopia is dark and it smells like shit, but I guess it's "home". Just for now, you know? Not forever. Wilbur's been trying to get help from everyone he can, but no one is showing up, no one is coming to help us. It really does just seem like us three against everyone else, and I'm not going to lie to you Tubbo. I'm scared. I'm fucking terrified, because I don't know what's going to happen. Wilbur doesn't, either, and that's why I'm afraid. 

Wilbur always knew what was going to happen, and then he was wrong, and now he just doesn't know. Which scares me, it scares me really badly. I hate not knowing, I really fucking hate it, Tubbo. I thought that we had finally won ourselves our home back, and then it was just ripped away from us without giving us a chance to heal. War is such bullshit, Tubbo. I don't like war. I thought that I did, I thought it was cool and badass, but it isn't. It's just exhausting. 

Do you remember all those times that we'd hang out under the trees in Phil's backyard? He had an entire forest behind his house, and you and I would always go and explore. There was a river back there, too, do you remember that? I reckon you do. I really liked that place, I liked it a lot more because you were there. It was nice to be kids, wasn't it? It's been a long time since we were allowed to be kids again. I kinda miss it, but I'm not sure if I would be able to go back to before. You can't just brush off a war, can you? I don't think that you can. Maybe one day it'll all be scarred over and shit, healed and all that, but right now...

Yeah, I don't think we're going to be allowed to be kids ever again, Tubbo. And I don't like that, I really don't. It sucks. Wilbur keeps telling me that he's sorry for dragging me (and you) into this war, but the more I think about it, was it really his fault? He propositioned a war, but we didn't HAVE to go through with it. It isn't like he threatened us if we didn't want to fight. It was our choice. 

Tubbo, do you ever think that we made the wrong choice? 

The discs mean a lot to me, they really do. But L'manberg means more, and you mean the most. I'm sorry that I dragged you into this. You're not really a yes-man, but you follow me to places where neither of us, especially you, should be. And I do the same, so I don't really know why I'm blaming you. Well, I'm not BLAMING you. I'm sorry that I got rid of both of our childhoods, especially yours. After this war is done, I think that we should try and get away from fighting. Maybe we can ask Wilbur to...I don't know. I don't want us to be dictators, I don't want L'manberg to be hated because it rules over everything and everyone, but I don't want to have to fight anymore.

Sometimes, Tubbo, I look at my scars and I wonder, "wow, how the hell did that get there?" 

I think that I have too many to remember where the majority of them came from. There's one on my chest from when Dream shot me. There are the burn marks on my arms and my hands from the explosion. There's a really long one going down my back from the final control room. Do you ever look at your scars? I don't know how many you have, but I know that the war didn't leave you clean of them. Wilbur has a scar that goes down the side of his jaw and over his lips, and he doesn't ever talk about that one. Wilbur doesn't talk about his past a lot, and I wonder how young he was when he went to war. 

Tubbo, do you think that we're going to win this? I think we will. I hope we will, at least. I don't want to have to stay in this fucking pit my entire life. I hate it here, Tubbo. I don't know if that's just because you're not with me or because it's gross and it isn't L'manberg. I just wish that I was back home, I just wish that I was with you. I wish we were arguing or something, I just wish I was there with you. You don't even have anyone on your side, you've got no one to talk to. 

I'm sorry, Tubbo. I should have grabbed you and taken you with me when we ran. I wasn't thinking, I was just scared and surprised. 

We'll meet again, though, okay? I promise that we'll see each other again. We always manage to find a way, right? Life can't keep us apart for too long. 

Remember to write to me when you get this, yeah? Okay. Love you.

- Tommy 


Hi, Niki.

Will here, things have not gotten better. Like, at all. I'm very sorry that I haven't been responding to your letters, but things have been busy. I'm sure you understand. Leading a rebellion is a day of hard work, let me tell you that. Well, anyways. I hope that you're doing okay, I really do. Tell me about your day, tell me about how things have been going. Have you been at your bakery? Have they tried to stop you? I'll kill any of them if they laid a hand on you, Niki. All you have to do is say the word and I'll come storming back on into L'manberg and kill anyone who hurt you. 

I know that you would do the same. 

Well, Niki. Things have been rough. Things have been very, very rough. I managed to find an old guitar down in this little ravine, which leads me to think that someone else used to live here. Maybe not live, maybe they died here. I've never found any bones or any other sign of life, so maybe I had come here before? I'm not sure, I don't remember wandering down into a ravine. But, then again, I have had sleepwalking problems my entire life. Do you remember the time I jumped into the river when we were kids? God, the look on your face was so funny, Niki. I feel bad for laughing, because I knew that you were scared, but it was so funny. You must understand now, you have to see it from my point. 

Anyways. 

Technoblade has joined us down here. It's less lonely with him, actually. As much as I adore my little brother, Tommy needs his own space right now. This is the hardest thing he's ever had to deal with in his life, and I know better than to push and make him talk to me. Don't worry, Niki - I'm keeping a close eye on him. He'll be just fine, I promise. We always end up fine, don't we? We always end up okay in the end, no matter what happens to us. 

I'm sure you remember my adventures to the sky. I'm sure you remember me coming back home, scarred and brittle and broken. If I'm being honest with you, Niki, I don't really know what happened to me. I don't remember much of that time, and I'm nearly certain that it's because I don't want to remember. Something bad must have happened to me for my mind to make me forget. I do remember New Milo, though. I remember him very well. 

There are a few blurred out scenes that I can see, if I really, REALLY focus. I see myself standing in the middle of an ocean, the water up to my stomach, rising to my chest. I remember sitting on stone that hovered in the sky, staring down at the void below me. I sometimes can hear my own voice in those memories, but it's desperate and sad. I don't like thinking about that time in my life very much. Niki, are there little bits and pieces of your memories that have simply disappeared? I read once, somewhere, that it's because we can't handle it. It's because we'll hurt too badly if our mind continues to remember, so it chooses to forget. It blocks out the bad things. 

I don't think I like that all too much. 

Well, don't get me wrong, of course. I don't particularly enjoy remembering bad things, but I do wish I could remember. I don't like having gaps in my mind, gaps that make me feel like I've lost entire years of my life. If I could choose to remember everything, I think that I would. Though I'm not entirely sure. It's one of those things that you'd have to decide while it was happening, I suppose. Well, Niki, I believe that it's time for me to leave. I can hear my brothers calling for me, and while I don't think we're being invaded, I would much rather check to make sure. 

I love you more than I could ever say, Niki. I know that you feel the same. Thank you for staying with me throughout everything. I truly could not ask for a better best friend than you, Niki. Until the next time, 

- Will. 


Hi, Tommy!!! 

I'm really really sorry that I didn't write to you sooner but everything was happening and I didn't get a chance I'm sorrey sorry :(

Okay, Niki is writing this letter for me so you can read it! I hope that's okay? All of the words are mine, don't worry. I'm having a really hard time here, Tommy. It's been difficult to adjust without you. How have you been? How have you been doing in Pogtopia? I know that you don't like it there, Niki tells me that Wilbur hates it, too. I think that things will get better soon, though, I really do think that. I think that we'll figure all of this out, and then things will be okay.

I don't really think that I regret what we did. I think that it was stupid, but I don't regret it. I think that it's better to not regret things that you can't change. Maybe that's just me? I don't know. I think that the war is going to be over soon, and I'm not sure why. I've just got a feeling, you know? And plus, it's nice to hope, right? Tommy, I think that we made the right choice at the time. I think that we did what we thought was best, and that's all we could have ever done. Right now, maybe it was dumb and we should've thought it through, but it's way too late for that. 

All we can do right now is hope that things work out. 

Tommy, I think that we'll be okay. I think that we'll work this out. We're going to be okay, and I know that. We always turn out okay, don't we? That's just how the world works. It gets real shitty for a bit and then it goes back to being okay. That's just how things are. Please be safe, Tommy. I really need you to be safe. If I lost you after all of this, I would..I don't know. 

Sorrey for any mis takes now, I didn't want Niki to hear this part. 

I love you Tommy. Your my best friend and I don't think I would be ok without you. I just need you to be ok for a little longer. I just need you to stay ok. No matter what happens, pleaese just remember that I'm always gonna be hear for you. No matter WHAT!!! You are my best friend, Tommy!! I will always stick with you, ok?? I just need you too keep holding out for a bit longer, that's all, ok? Please be safe, for me. 

Love you Tommy!!!! 

- Tubbo! :D


And so the ram rises once more. 

Schlatt, my dearest antagonist, did you ever think that you would fool me? That you could put on your prettiest smile and wave me off? Well, my beloved foil, you happen to be so disgustingly wrong. It isn't very fun to write to you, and I much prefer looking at my unsent letters to my son rather than write the ones to you. I know you'll see these, I know that you'll read them and you'll laugh. But deep down, my lovely villain, you will know that they're true. 

Did you ever hear about the man who had everything?

The man who was put in power, not because he was a good person, but because he got lucky?

The man who, no matter what, stood by his morals, even though everyone screamed at him that he was evil? 

Schlatt, my best friend, you are that man. You will be written down in history as God's greatest mistake, and you will be forgotten about. Your face will be torn out of history books, the papers will be burnt to ashes. 

Ashes to ashes, Schlatt. Ashes to ashes. 

Remember when we sat, with our legs hanging over the ledges of rock formations? Remember when you told me that we would never get older? Remember when we watched the ocean rise, when it touched our feet? Do you remember the call of the mockingbird, Schlatt? Do you remember the way he sung to you, to us? The way he led us up to the old house on the hill, locking our souls there for eternity? 

I remember, Schlatt. I remember the times that you and I shared. I remember listening to that old bird, listening to the way he sung of hope and joy. He warned us about this, did he not? And yet, Schlatt, and yet we never had listened. I always saw your gold, never your crooked. I always watched you with bright eyes and a heavy heart, because god, did I want to be like you. You were hope, Schlatt. You were the good in my life, the sun that hung in my skies. 

You were never supposed to be crooked, Schlatt.

I clung onto my hope that you were simply tired and scared, that you were hurting deep inside of your chest. I watched as your horns curled out from your head and cupped the sides of your face, I watched as your brown eyes turned yellow. I watched as your soul was ripped away from your chest, and all the while, I thought I could save you. 

Did you know, my foil, that people enjoy being saviours? 

They like to look at people and take them by the hand, whisper to them that "everything will be okay". They like to cradle them close to their chests and listen to their sobs, they enjoy being the hero, the saviour that someone so desperately needed. Though they never stay for long, of course. Once they realise that their lover is broken to the point of irrepair, they leave. 

I never left you, though we weren't lovers. I assume that it would be the same for friends, but I suppose I may have been wrong. 

You and I, Schlatt, we were supposed to rule the world together. You told me that we would forever be young, that one day, we would become kings of nations, that we would live forever. 

I always believed your lies, my dearest villain. No matter what you told me, I believed the words. I listened to them so intently, as if they were spoken from God Himself. I listened, I hung on your every misspoken syllable and slightly tilted metaphor. I listened with the intent to remember, and I still do. 

"And as the Emperor of this great nation," you had said, "I hereby exile Wilbur Soot, and TommyInnit." 

Those were the words you spoke to me, the ones that ring in my head and haunt my dreams. Do you remember the mockingbird, Schlatt? Do you remember how he told us about life and death? Do you remember how he spoke to us, how he told us the tales of two Gods? Do you remember him, Schlatt? He told us our fate. I listened to him. 

Did you?

He sung tales of a man who had everything. 

He sung tales of a man who was put in power, not because he was a good person, but because he got lucky.

He sung tales of a man who, no matter what, stood by his morals, even though everyone screamed at him that he was evil. 

You ignored the mockingbird, Schlatt.

It's a shame for you, it seems.

He told you how to win, Schlatt. He told you how to live, how to become God.

And yet, you didn't listen. 

But, my dearest antagonist, I did. 

I listened to the song of the mockingbird. 

And I remember. 

- Wilbur Soot.


Hi, Will, 

I miss you a lot. I know that you miss me, too, but I still want to say it. I really hope that you're doing okay. I don't know how you're able to do it, Will. You stay so strong, and I never have understood it. When you told me you were going to war, you said it like you knew that you'd win. And you did, you did win. WE won. We won that war, but it was because of you. I know that Tommy gave up his discs, but you were the leading cause of everything. 

You got us through so much, Will. You pushed us through the hard times and you were always there for us. You never stopped to look after yourself. I can't count the times I had to drag you away from your plans, to drag you away from your desk. You were so intent on finishing everything, on making everything perfect for everyone else that you never even thought about yourself. You're so kind, Will. You need to rest, okay? Please just rest, for me. I know it's hard, and I know that you'll lie to me and you'll tell me that you will, even though you won't. The war can wait, Will. Your mental health, YOU, can't. 

I'll still be here for you when you come back. 

This isn't like the war against Dream and his minions. This is a war against a tyrant who separated us from each other. He knew what he was doing when he grabbed Tubbo and pushed you and Tommy away. He tried to destroy your spirits, to get rid of your morale. But it won't work. Just give us, me, time. For once in your life, give yourself some breathing room. This war won't go away in a matter of days or weeks, we have to be even more careful with Schlatt than we had to be with Dream. We aren't together anymore, it's so much harder to fight when your own soldiers are away.

Will, listen to me. 

It is going to work.

All of this, it isn't for nothing. We WILL be okay. We'll figure all of this out, I PROMISE. 

But, until we do, stop working yourself to the bone. Think of it this way, since I know you won't listen to ME: do you want Tommy to see you worn to the bone? Would you want him to look at you and see the bags under your eyes? 

You care about him more than anyone else in this entire world, Will. Do what's best for yourself, do what's best for US, and rest. 

All of us will be here when you reemerge. We always have been, we always will be. 

I love you, Will. Be safe. I'll always be on your side. 

- Niki


Wilbur,

Do you remember the call of the mockingbird?;

He sung of heroes and spies;

He told me once of love and hope;

He sang to me about heartache and pain;

He made my ears bleed and my head ring;

The call of the mockingbird carried lies to your sweet mind;

Corruption filling your brain;

He taught me of sleep and of weakness;

He made me believe in a God that never existed;

He cast me into the fire;

He burnt me alive;

The call of the mockingbird tainted your mind;

And so I shut my ears;

Praying to the God I didn't believe in that you would do the same;

Do you remember the call of the mockingbird?;

I remember his singing;

And I remember breathing my last breath;

And I remember it all;

And I remember;

And I remember.

He lied.


Dear Quackity,

I worry about you alot. I know you don't like me (I don't know why), but I want you to be ok. I don't know if you like Schlatt, but you look scarred around him. Why? Did he hurt you? Will you pleaese just talk to me? We only have eachother. 

- Tubbo


Hello, Wilbur. 

I understand that this may or may not make you angry, but I figured that I might as well reach out.

Hi. How are you?

Sorry, that's a dumb start. I know that you're probably not doing well, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm on your side. I've been talking with Niki, and I've been learning about Schlatt and "his" country. I know L'manberg inside and out, and ever since he started to change things, I've been mapping that down. I know all of the exits in and out of that place, and I think that I could be of use. Now, I'm not going to make you pay for my help or my information - I just really, really miss you, Wilbur. We used to be really good friends, and I understand why you hate me now. 

I hate me, too. But it's fine, you don't need to hear about my self-deprecation escapades, now do you? Attached to this letter are all of my maps that I've made, detailing the inside and out of the newly-named "Manberg". I've started to, with the help of Niki and a third party who wishes to remain unknown, dig tunnels. They're littered all under Manberg, and if we do this right, we can emerge from behind the podium and kill Schlatt and his partners. 

The tunnels are our best chance, Wilbur. And no one knows them better than I do.

Of course, you don't have to respond or take me up on my offer. Just know, Wilbur, that it's there. I'm entrusting you with all of my maps, and as far as I'm aware, they're all up to date. Be safe, Wilbur. 

You're my President. I'm sorry that I let power get to my head - I never thought that I would collapse under the weight of kingship. 

Wilbur Soot, I believe in you and your ability to scheme and plan. I believe in you, and I always have. I always will. 

Be safe, my President. I'm on the right side of history this time. 

- Eret


Dear Wilbur,

I need fucking help. 

Listen, I'm not going to grovel at your fucking feet and beg you to help me, but consider this me begging if it makes you happy. I need HELP, NOW. Schlatt wasn't that bad, okay? He literally wasn't that bad at first, he was a good person, he wasn't great but he was good enough, and that worked for me. Listen, I seriously need your help. I don't know how I'm supposed to get out of here, he's always watching me or Tubbo, and this is my only shot. 

Wilbur, listen. 

I'm going through fucking hell right now. 

I've got bruises the size of goddamn boulders everywhere, I've got new scars, and they're all from him. I don't want your fucking pity, I don't fucking need that shit. I don't care about me, but listen, LISTEN. I'm taking the goddamn brunt of this, I'm making sure he doesn't lay a fucking hand on Tubbo. I'm going mental trying to keep him away from that kid, and I don't even know if it's worth it or not. All he does is yell at him and call him names and make him think that he's worthless, but he's not fucking hitting him. 

Wilbur, I need help. I need to get out of here, I can't do this anymore. I have to go, I have to fucking get out of here. You need to get Tubbo out if you can't do anything else. I'll fucking survive here, I don't care how long it takes to get me out of here. But you NEED to get Tubbo out, you have to make sure he's okay. I'm doing my goddamn best, but there's fuck all that I can do.

November 16th, there's going to be a festival. That's my only chance. That's Tubbo's only chance.

Be there.

- Quackity


Dear Technoblade,

Wilbur told me to write out my feelings, and I think that's a fucking stupid idea, but I'm going to listen to him so I don't punch you in the face. 

You are not my brother anymore. 

Fuck you. I hate you. Why the FUCK did you think it would be okay to do that? You KILLED Tubbo. You KILLED him. You KILLED my BEST FRIEND. RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU. WHY THE FUCK DID I EVER TRUST YOU? WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT IN TRUST ANYMORE?

First Will went fucking insane and now you, and all I have left is Tubbo. I only have Tubbo, and he isn't even fucking awake. You want to know why he's not awake, Technoblade? It's because he's fucking hurt. It's because of you. You hurt him. 

I HATE YOU.

I hope to god that you suffer for your entire life. I hope to god that you get betrayed just like Tubbo did, and I hope that it fucking hurts. 

Technoblade, I am going to make you hurt. I don't care how I do it, but I'm going to do it. 

I fucking hate you.

- Tommy.


Dear Quackity,

I'm sorry.

I thought that I would be fast enough, I thought that Techno wouldn't do what he did. 

There are tunnels under L'manberg, I've sent you maps with this letter. If you go to them, you'll find a hidden tunnel that leads here. I've circled that route in red. 

Ignore the TNT. 

- Wilbur. 


Dearest Schlatt,

I am but a weary man who sways in the breeze and hangs in the trees; 

For my days have grown long and agonising; 

For my life has become a weeping tale of agony, repeated; 

They sing to me and touch my face;

They call out to me and hum soft lullabies in my dreams;

I hang from the trees I created;

I sit on their branches and watch my blood spill on the ground;

For I have built myself into this beloved country;

When it weeps;

I do the same.

The mockingbird sings tales of heroes and tales of their slain enemies.

That day on the hill, my beloved foil, he spoke to us about the orca and the ram. He told us about their fall. That was before you had horns, but it should have been telling enough. He told us that the ram would spiral, he told us that your heart would be the first to turn to stone. And so far, my antagonist, everything he's said has come true. He told me that the orca would win the war at the cost of something great to him, and I assume that may have been my friendship with you. 

Or, perhaps, it was when my son turned his back on me. 

Maybe it was watching you hold a knife to Tommy's throat.

Schlatt, my villain, you cannot defeat me in any way that matters. The mockingbird has already told me what I needed to know. 

Schlatt, I wish you luck in your tiresome existence. We may be enemies on different sides of this war, but you must understand that I still love you. I know that you feel the same, do you not? A friendship like we had cannot simply go to the flames in a matter of months, no. It takes years for the hollow feeling in our chests to settle in. No matter how much you hate me, and I you, we will never fall from love. 

Love and hate can coexist, Schlatt. We are living proof of that, are we not?

I enjoy your poetry, my foil.

Tell me, did you enjoy mine?

- Wilbur Soot


Phil,

I need help. I need so much help, Phil. Wilbur has gone completely mental, I can't get through to him. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, Phil, I just don't know. 

Phil, you told me that, no matter what, you would be there for me.

Please tell me that you weren't lying when you said that. Please tell me you'll listen, please tell me you'll help me. Everyone (everyone but Tubbo) has lied to me, Phil. Wilbur told me that he'd make sure everything would be okay. He promised me that we would win the war and everything would go back to normal. Phil, he lied, he fucking lied. I can't help him, I can't convince him. Please, Phil, PLEASE respond. Please help me.

He's your son.

So am I. 

Please listen to me. Please help. I just need help, Phil. I just need help, just this once. I'll never ask for anything ever again, I promise. 

Please.

- Your son, Tommy


Fundy,

It's been such a long time since we spoke. 

I would like to tell you more, but I can't. I love you, my boy. My son, my champion. No matter what happens, you'll always be my little champion. I love you more than words can say, Fundy. I would fight Heaven and Hell to keep you safe, and I would hope that you'd know that. Fundy, my son, you will go far in your life. You'll do great things. 

You are perfect, Fundy.

You know, you've got your mother's eyes. I always joked about where she came from and who she was, but in the end, she was more human than any of us could ever hope to be. Her eyes were green and yellow, with little flecks of brown and gold in them. She was gorgeous, Fundy. Her hair was red, just like yours, and her laugh was nearly identical to your own. You got all of her good qualities, every single good thing you got from her.

I wish I was a better father, Fundy. I know it's far too late for you to forgive me, but I wish that you would. 

Maybe, in an alternate world, things would have worked.

You'll always be my champion. 

I love you, Fundy. 

- Wilbur


Dear Tommy,

Soon.

- Phil.


Wilbur, 

I think it's funny that you told me I'd be the villain.

You lost your mind, Wilbur. 

When the mockingbird sang, when he warned you about losing something great, that's what he meant. 

And to think that you thought of yourself as the hero...

The mockingbird warned you, didn't he? 

And you didn't listen. 

- Schlatt


Dear Tommy, Niki, Fundy, Tubbo, Techno, Schlatt, Eret, Quackity, Dream, and everyone else who I have ever written to,

 

Smithereens.

 

- Wilbur Soot, former President of L'manberg.


Dear Phil,

You were too late. I wish you had gotten there sooner, but at least you showed up. What happened in that room, Phil? What happened there? What did he do? What did you do? Did you talk? Was he hurting? 

Did you make it quick?

I miss him, Phil. I miss him more than I thought I would. When Wilbur died, L'manberg died with him. There's not going to be a new L'manberg. 

I don't want a new L'manberg. 

Techno tried to kill me. 

Killing my best friend wasn't enough, apparently.

I just want to go back home, Phil. I just want things to go back to how they were. 

Why is everyone so awful inside, Phil? Am I awful inside? Is Tubbo? Are you? I didn't think Wilbur was awful inside, but he was. I'm scared and confused. I don't understand. 

Phil, I just want to go back to before this war. To when I was happy, to when I didn't have to go to a gravestone to talk to my brother. 

Phil, do you think that we'll end up okay?

I don't believe in that anymore. 

I'd like to. 

- Tommy


Dear Tubbo,

I'm proud of you.

- Tommy


Dear Technoblade,

I understand. 

I'm still mad. 

I miss you a lot. You're still my older brother. I'm sorry.

Should I be the one saying sorry? No, I shouldn't be the one who has to say that word. But I'm going to, because I'm fucking desperate to get my family back together. 

I'm sorry, is that good enough for you? 

I just want everything to go back to normal. I know you don't like "government", but it isn't even that BAD. We're doing good things, Techno, we're repairing the nation. It's just a place to live. It's only a government if you make it a government.

Please just come back.

- Tommy


Dear Wilbur, 

No point in writing to you because you're dead, but I'm going it anyways.

I miss you so fucking much. 

Why'd you have to go crazy? We were all with you. We would've helped, we were always so ready to help. 

I'm so tired, Will. 

I'm so fucking tired.

And I'm mad. I'm angry at you, and I'm pissed off at what you did, and I'm sad and upset and scared, and no one is here to tell me what to do anymore. 

You led me through life. What am I supposed to do now that you're dead?

The war is over. 

Is it a bad thing that I wish that it wasn't?

If it wasn't over, you'd be alive. I'd be suffering every single day and so would you, but you'd be alive. It would be worth it. 

If I could go back and do it all again, I would. I'd make sure you lived. 

I miss you, Will. Everyone else misses you, too.

There's no point in telling you to come back, but I wish you could. I wish you'd come back. 

I'm sorry I wasn't good enough to pull you out of your mindset. 

I love you. Maybe I should have said it more.

- Tommy


Dear me,

It'll be alright.

Just keep going. 

You have to keep going.

No matter what happens, you have to keep going. 

If not for yourself, do it for those we lost. Do it for those who died. 

Do it for Tubbo, do it to see him smile. 

Do it for Wilbur, to honour his memory and legacy.

Do it for Techno, to make him proud. 

Do it for Phil, to prove you're not a kid anymore. 

Do it for Niki, so she has someone to think about other than Wilbur. 

Do it for Fundy, to remind him that he still has family left.

Do it so one day you won't have to survive anymore. 

Do it so you can live again. 

- TommyInnit, Vice President of New L'manberg, son of Philza, brother of Wilbur Soot and Technoblade, best friend of Tubbo. 


Dear Tubbo,

We were never made for war. 

- Tommy


Dear L'manberg, 

Wilbur would have been proud. 

- Tommy


Dear L'manberg,

This is my last letter.

I'm no longer welcome inside your walls. My best friend, Tubbo, your President, exiled me. 

L'manberg, I think that you were the worst thing to ever happen to me. 

Maybe Techno was right. Wilbur had the right idea in blowing you up. L'manberg, you are the cause of all of my problems. 

L'manberg, you have ruined my life. 

I'm tired. 

I used to think that things would turn out okay in the end. I thought that everything would be okay. 

That I'd get my own happy ending. 

God, how was I so wrong?

I'm just a kid. I shouldn't have to worry about surviving and about if things will be okay. That should be taken care of for me.  

But I'm not just a kid anymore, and I haven't been for a long time. What I am is a soldier, I'm a fighter and a killer and a murderer. I've killed people because I had to, and I've died because I needed to. All of my deaths have been on your grounds, L'manberg. That should've been the first sign.

L'manberg, this is the end. 

- The one who loved you the most, Tommy


Tubbo,

I still love you. 

I wonder if you still love me.

- Tommy.


Tommy,

I love you so much. I'm so sorry

Please forgive me when I figure out how to get you back home

I'm so sorry

I'm so sorry

I love you

I always have and I always will

- Tubbo


Tubbo,

I forgive you. I always have.

I always will.

- Tommy


Dear L'manberg,

You are destroyed. You are gone. 

Finally, I thought. Finally. That was my first thought.

You should have been destroyed years ago.

Along with you went my discs. 

Finally. 

Wilbur would have been so disappointed in you. He would have been ashamed of what you had become. God knows everyone else is.

All you did was make people lose their minds. 

Wilbur, Fundy, Niki, Schlatt, Quackity, Tubbo. 

Those are your victims. Two of them are dead, one was well on his way, and the other three are never going to heal. 

The full list of your victims include the following:

Wilbur Soot: You drove him to madness, he was killed in his own nation by his own father. He never stopped loving you.

Schlatt: I've heard he wasn't always bad. Just like Wilbur, you drove him insane. You made him lose his mind, and to cope, he drank away his problems. He drank away you.

Niki: She was unloved by you after all she did. She burnt down your singular tree, she burnt down your lungs. She hurts more than you could imagine. 

Fundy: You took away his father and his family. You took away his fiance and one of his lives. You made him into an orphan, you made him into a monster.

Quackity: He's turning into his abuser. He's becoming the next Schlatt, the next corrupt life in this godforsaken hellhole. You made him hurt so badly that he started to lash out to ease his own pain.

Tubbo: Fuck you. You took my best friend and you destroyed him. He will never be the same. Fuck you.

Eret: He went mad with power. He betrayed you, and when you were hurt and begging him for help, he came back. And then you took everything from him once again.

Technoblade: You made him lose his family. One brother is dead and the other hates him. We can never mend the bridges broken. 

Phil: You made him kill his own son. Fuck you.

Me, Tommy: I was your first casualty and I'll be your last. If I die and you're made to rise again, I will come back from my grave and burn you to the fucking ground. 

No, I think I'll do something else. What did Wilbur say, all those months ago?

Right. 

Smithereens.

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