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The cold air of the cave hit him as he stepped out of the Inbetween, the portal pushing him out with a benevolent woosh. He gasped as his brain reeled with the events that had just played out before him. For once, Karl wished he could forget.
He had to force himself to climb out of the portal room, holding on to the stone walls for any support he could get. He felt that if he stopped moving, his body would be consumed by a paralyzing panic.
Remember the present, remember the present, remember the-
Karl reached his hidden library, the library that held stories across all timelines. The nightmares he sometimes had to bear. The nightmares he had to relive as soon as he wrote them down.
Which was what he had to do now, with his limp quill and shaky hands.
The Hellbent Warriors
A man with nothing to lose, who used to have everything.
And a man with a future flourishing with potential, he didn’t know of yet.
His body trembled with every letter he wrote.
Once best friends in a time long ago, and both ferocious in their own ways.
A fight in the nether, an unnecessary war.
The images scraped against his heartstrings, causing him to gag.
Led them both to their gruesome demise.
It was not anger that led them there. Nor fear. Nor jealously.
He wiped away his tears before they blotched the ink.
Some think it was to reminisce on old memories one last time.
While others believe it was to prove something.
“But you didn’t need to prove anything to me Sap,” Karl mumbled to himself, struggling to ground back to the present.
He signed the book and pressed it into its respective spot, adding to the twisted memories Karl had trouble keeping track of. He turned away from the bookshelves, too distraught to write a diary entry.
The damp cave air made it hard to breathe, his thoughts racing around as fast as his heart. Karl held on to his face, trying to wipe his tears as quickly as they were spluttering out.
I should’ve told him, I should’ve told him, I should’ve-
But what if Sapnap didn’t feel the same way? Karl didn’t even know if he liked guys or not. But maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t feel like he needed to prove anything. Or maybe he wouldn’t have gone to fight in the first place. Or maybe Karl could’ve found a way to say Sapnap means the world to him without really saying it, or-
It doesn’t matter. He must do whatever it takes.
Whatever he can do to save Sapnap.
Even if it makes his life feel more uncontrollable than it already is, despite him being granted the power to change the past and future. Oh how much less complicated his life would be without it.
A knock on the door upstairs yanked Karl out of his accumulating thoughts.
“Coming!” Karl yelled instinctively, and only after a couple of seconds really understood what that meant. He would deal with what happened later, it wasn’t like he could tell anyone anyways.
He ran upstairs from the library, quickly breaking and replacing the wall that concealed the hidden staircase. It was always a bit tedious, but Karl always forgot to make it more accessible.
He scrambled to the mirror, fixing his messy hair and hoping his puffy eyes would be unnoticeable. His reflection stared back at him with tired, pleading eyes.
Karl turned away and shook his head, rushing towards the door, and swinging it open.
“Karl! Everyone’s going to hang out at Quackity’s house soon and I was wondering-”
It’s him.
“Karl? What’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost dude.”
Karl heard Sapnap talking but all he could do was stand and stare, watching as his friend became more and more concerned. He felt his breath quicken again, his body felt like static.
He latched on to Sapnap, holding on to him as if to keep himself afloat from the panic that was drowning him.
The scorching heat of the nether.
“Hey I’m here, it’s okay.” Sapnap tried to comfort, surprised and worried by the state of his friend.
The commotion of the others.
“Would a walk help?”
Sapnap and I getting separated in the crowd.
Karl shook his head; he barely felt like he could stand.
Sapnap fighting one on one with Dream.
Sapnap led Karl inside, and held him, reminding him to breathe.
They both had fire resistance potions, but the narrow cliff they found themselves on only had netherrack below.
“S-Sap?”
Sapnap knocked Dream off.
“Yes?”
But as he fell, he shot Sapnap with his crossbow.
“Sapnap,” Karl struggled to put the words in his mouth, not wanting his voice to shake as much as his body was.
A fatal blow.
“It’s okay, take your time.”
Through the heart.
“I-I can’t tell you what’s wrong,” Karl muttered, the static in him dissipating to warmth from Sapnap’s hug.
I held him while he lost his last life.
“You don’t have to, just know I’ll always be here for you dude.”
I never got to tell him how much I loved him.
Karl finally looked up into Sapnap’s worried eyes. He still hadn’t let go of him. Karl didn’t get to see this side of him often, except in his laughter and that soft smile that he would only show Karl. It lifted his heart a little, and he softened his hold on his friend.
“Hey, I’m sorry for getting all teary-”
“Don’t be Karl,” Sapnap wiped the tears away from Karl’s reddened, puffy face, with the gentle touch of his calloused fingers, “Don’t be sorry for anything.”.
A comforting silence fell between them.
The nightmares still loomed in the back of his head, threatening to take over again, but the feeling of Sapnap against him reminded him that he was here, not there.
He could still change the future.
“Sapnap,” Karl took a deep breath, giving a nervous smile, “I know I can’t tell you what’s bothering me, but there’s something else I need to tell you.”
Sapnap nodded, signaling for him to go on. His brown eyes seemed to hold all the warmth of the sun and nether combined.
He felt the tears rise again, and he had to break eye contact. It was always hardest to start talking.
“I-I know this is a horrible time to tell you, and it’s unexpected, and I probably just scared you half to death,” The words felt heavier and heavier, “A-and you probably don’t even feel the same way back. And I’m sorry. And I- ” His breaths had become shallow and hasty.
Karl felt Sapnap wrap around him again. The warmth calmed the surge once more.
“Shhh it’s okay, we can talk about this at a better time,” Sapnap hushed, “I got you Karl, nothing is going to hurt you right now.”
Sapnap felt closer to him now, a steady rock that promised to protect him.
Karl moved into the heat, clenching his friend’s white t-shirt as he cried, and cried. Letting many months worth of swept away emotions burst inside of him, painful, but nonetheless healing.
It was overwhelming. All of it.
But I’m the one who got me to this point.
He flinched and buried his head in the crook of Sapnap’s neck, quietly sniffling as his friend rubbed his back in a soothing pattern.
There they stood in Karl’s living room, neither of them willing to let go. The world slowly stopped spinning, as the sunset cast golden rays on to the walls.
“Are you feeling a bit better?” Sapnap asked in a genuine, gentle tone. The softness of an ember that still manages to glow.
Karl nodded, feeling his shoulders loosen up. He took a deep breath and moved out of the embrace, but continued to hold on to Sapnap’s arms. The brunet kept his eyes on the ground, smiling weakly.
“Thank you Sap,” Karl murmured, then remembering added, “I’m sorry, I should probably let you get to Quackitys.”
“Are you kidding me? I can see those guys any day,” Sapnap paused, “I want to be here for you dude. I want to be here with you.”
He curled his fingers around Karl’s, causing him to look up in surprise. They both smiled, and Karl almost broke out in tears again, or maybe even a nervous giggle.
Sapnap had Karl sit on the sofa while he got him some water and tissues. They laughed and joked around a bit, knowing how salty Quackity was going to be that they didn’t show up. The two of them talked until the sun went down past the horizon, and the dull buzz of night was creeping upon them.
The dim lights and the surge of emotions earlier began to ache his body with exhaustion. His friend beside him didn’t help either, who seemed to radiate with all the warmth of a furnace. He’d been talking about the things he’d done that day until they both lulled into quiet.
Karl looked at him, watching his friend’s dark eyelashes flutter to keep awake. They were nestled up against one another, basking in each other’s pleasant company.
Despite the comfort all around, the occasional fear remained in his mind.
“Sap, can I ask you a favor?”
“Of course, anything.” Sapnap’s curious eyes meeting Karl’s.
“Can you help me remember to forget?”
The question hung in the air, filled with honesty and care.
It was a request he thought he’d never ask for. But for once it might be his saving grace.
Sapnap’s eyes softened with a hint of sadness but he understood. He cupped Karl’s jawline with his rough hands.
They closed their eyes.
They met each other’s lips, kissing slowly and carefully, bringing each other closer with every little flame they felt between them.
Karl melted into him, being enveloped by the sincere love that he’d forever be grateful for. Every touch sparked his heart, enough to fill his body with honey instead of the static that had filled it before.
It made him smile, and he started in a fit of innocent giggles.
For a moment Sapnap had been worried he’d done something wrong, but soon began chuckling and grinning. He pulled him close and pecked his face with kisses, causing Karl to roll with laughter.
They sat cuddled up on the couch, making the other one laugh with exaggerated and real affection.
Sapnap took a blanket that was laying on the ground and wrapped it around Karl. Then he laid down and brought Karl with him.
They giggled as Karl pressed into his friend’s chest, feeling his face flush a rosy hue. He opened his eyes to see Sapnap grinning happily down at him. It was hard to see his features in the light, but he felt the love radiating off of him.
His body felt so relaxed and drained, it was almost impossible to stay awake.
Sapnap seemed to notice he was struggling to keep his eyes open.
“I know you’re tired; go to sleep,” Sapnap whispered, playing with his friend’s hair, “I’m not going anywhere.”
“But will you be able to sleep too?”
Sapnap nodded, leaning down to kiss Karl on the forehead.
Karl wrapped around him, making sure his face stayed out of the blanket.
“Goodnight Sap.”
“Goodnight Karl.”
The sound of his friend’s heart comforted him, and the rise and fall of Sapnap’s chest allowed the time-traveler to slowly sink into a dreamless sleep.