Archive of Our Own

“Pack a bag and meet me outside your building”, Soobin mumbled, reading over Yeonjun's message once again as he stood outside his building with his duffel bag thrown over his shoulder and looking up and down the street. He wiped a few droplets of sweat from his brow and internally cursed Yeonjun for making him leave his air-conditioned apartment and step out into the scorching heat of summer. And all that for him to apparently not even show up. When he was just about to call him, he spotted Yeonjun's car driving around the corner and pulling up to his building. He stopped in front of Soobin, honked once and rolled down the window.

“Throw your bag into the trunk and hop in”, he called out and smiled brightly.

Soobin wasn't sure what he was getting himself into this time, likely becoming part of another of Yeonjun's crazy plans, but he did his bidding nonetheless. He had gotten used to Yeonjun not informing him about his plans and just letting him drag him wherever. As long as it wasn't illegal and it made Yeonjun happy, Soobin didn't really care that much. When he was comfortably seated in Yeonjun's old Mustang – a hand-me-down from his dad that he refused to get rid off – he looked over at his friend who was still smiling brightly and drumming his fingers against the steering wheel to the rhythm of the song currently playing on the radio.

Soobin fastened his seatbelt: “Are you planning on telling what's going on?”

“I need to get away from the heat of the city. It's too crowded, too hot and everything's moving too fast. We have another two weeks of summer break before university starts up again and I decided we should use them. So I thought, let's get away.”

“And where exactly are we going?”, Soobin asked a little wary.

“We'll drive until we get to the sea and the heat becomes more bearable.”

“Am I right to assume you didn't pick a nearby beach we can reach within an hour?”

“You know me too well. But it'll be worth it. You'll love the place I have in mind, trust me.”

Soobin raised his eyebrows: “That sounds like I should have brought more stuff than I did.”

“This isn't a trip that's meant to be perfectly planned out. It'll be fun”, Yeonjun assured him.

“I don't know, I've never road-tripped before.”

“Me neither. But that's the fun of it. We can have our first together”, Yeonjun smiled brightly, rolled his window back up so the heat wouldn't get in and hit the gas pedal.

It took them a while – and a lot of cursing on Yeonjun's part – until they had finally made it out of the city but when they hit the roads of the countryside and there was nothing more in front of them other than fields and trees as far as the eye could see, both of them felt like they could suddenly breathe. Yeonjun rolled down the windows and Soobin closed his eyes, letting his head fall back against the headrest and enjoying the way the warm summer breeze caressed his face. If he had opened his eyes for just a little moment, he would have seen the way Yeonjun looked at him, with a fond smile and a little too much love in his eyes for it to be entirely platonic. When Soobin did open his eyes Yeonjun had his eyes fixed on the road and was once again drumming his fingers on the steering wheel with the beat of a song that was softly playing on the radio. Soobin looked at him for a moment, admiring the way his profile stood out against the bright sunlight. Then he extended his arm out of the window, letting his fingers play in the wind and trying to reach out far enough to touch the high grass on the side of the road. Yeonjun smiled when he glanced over and saw Soobin's upper body hang halfway out the window. Without a moment of hesitation he pulled over to the side of the road and stopped the engine. Soobin turned around and looked at him in surprise: “Why did you pull over?”

Yeonjun smiled and opened the door to get out. Soobin watched him round the front of the car and open the passenger door for him. He extended his hand for Soobin to take and pulled him out of the car. Soobin was a little startled by how closely they were suddenly standing in front of each other. He could feel Yeonjun's breath fan over his face and saw the way his eyes sparkled and glanced at his lips for just a moment before they crinkled up into two half-moons and Yeonjun laughed. He turned around to the field and pulled Soobin along into the grass.

“It's easier to play in the field like this”, he shouted without turning back.

Soobin watched as Yeonjun started to jump around in the field, fondness blooming in his chest. He didn't know why he had even agreed to come along on this trip instead of staying in his air-conditioned apartment but watching Yeonjun play in the field as the sun burned down on them, he felt like this trip was going to be memorable in more than one way. He laughed when Yeonjun stopped his jumping and turned around to him, pouting: “Come on! It's no fun if I have to play on my own.”

Soobin smiled and before he could really think about it they had started a wild game of tag. Being out here in the arms of nature and with nobody there to watch them he didn't even mind the heat of the summer bearing down on them. Within minutes sweat was beading on both their foreheads but neither of them cared. He had just managed to finally tag Yeonjun when his foot got stuck on a stone. He flailed his arms but couldn't prevent his fall. In a last desperate attempt to steady himself he reached out and grabbed Yeonjun's arm but it only served to send the other flying and landing on top of him. Yeonjun's forehead collided with Soobin's chest and for a moment all air left his lungs. But then he heard Yeonjun laugh and he decided that if this was the result of him tripping over his own feet, he would never need air to breathe again. Yeonjun lifted his head to look at him and pulled a few blades of grass from his hair that had gotten stuck there. Then he crossed his arms on Soobin's chest and rested his chin on them, looking at him with a soft smile.

“Your stamina still sucks.”

Soobin pushed against his shoulder, laughing, but ended up securing his arms around Yeonjun's slim waist either way. He watched Yeonjun's smile slowly fade when he realised how close they were to each other, his own bright grin turning into a soft smile as he plucked a blade of grass from Yeonjun's hair like he had done for him before. Yeonjun's breath got stuck in his throat for a moment, then he pushed himself up a little until his face was hovering directly above Soobin's. His eyes roamed over his face, getting stuck on his lips for a moment before moving up to his eyes. Soobin's eyes were starting to get watery but he didn't want to blink, not wanting to miss a single second of the way Yeonjun was looking at him. He opened his mouth to say something but the words got stuck when he saw the way Yeonjun's eyes immediately went to his mouth.

He was about to reach up to rest his hand against Yeonjun's cheek when the moment was broken by a droplet of sweat that fell from the tips of Yeonjun's hair and landed on Soobin's cheek, a little too close to his eye. Both of them started laughing and Yeonjun sat back on his heels, wiping the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand, pushing up his bangs in the process so they stuck up weirdly. Soobin laughed and sat up as well, trying to fix Yeonjun's bangs for him. Their movement resulted in Yeonjun now sitting in his lap who, when he noticed, quickly moved back to sit on the grass they had flattened in the process of their fall instead.

“Hey, look”, Yeonjun reached behind Soobin's hand and presented him with a flower when he withdrew it, “if we find more I can make a flower crown for you.”

Soobin's eyes lit up and he scrambled to get up, almost falling over again in his excitement hadn't Yeonjun's hands steadied him at the hips: “Then I'll make one for you, too. I bet I'll find nicer flowers than you.”

He took off racing through the field before Yeonjun could say anything. He quickly got to his feet as well, now more determined than ever to find the prettiest flowers the field had to offer. They spend a while running through the field and collecting flowers before they returned to the little spot they had accidentally made for themselves in the middle of the field to work on their crowns with the material they had managed to gather. They started out with their work sitting side by side but by the end they had settled for laying down in the grass instead with the occasional flower falling on their faces when they accidentally dropped it. The sun had wandered further across the sky and the heat had become more bearable, although truthfully neither of them had noticed it since they left the car really. By the time they finished their crowns the sound of buzzing had begun to fill the air around them and the world felt so peaceful neither of them ever wanted to return to the city.

Soobin looked up from his crown when Yeonjun gently placed his finished one on his head. He smiled and put his own on Yeonjun's head before grabbing the one on his own head to look at it. Yeonjun clearly had put a lot of work into it and Soobin decided to press it when they got home so he could hold on to it forever. He watched as Yeonjun examined the crown he had made for him with sparkling eyes and smelled the flowers he had used before putting it back on his head.

For a short moment Yeonjun only looked at him, like he was trying to commit everything about this moment to memory. Soobin frowned when he suddenly stood up and waded through the field back to the car.

“Where are you going?”, he shouted after him when Yeonjun disappeared out of sight.

“Just a second”, he heard him yell in reply and slowly got to his feet so he could at least see him.

Soobin walked closer but stopped when he heard music playing. Yeonjun came back with his phone in his hand, the rays of the evening sun dancing on his hair. He had turned on his playlist with his favourite songs. He put it down on a small rock, entirely too trusting that nothing would happen to it for Soobin's liking, and extended his hand: “Dance with me?”

Soobin blinked a few times before he understood what Yeonjun had asked, then he blushed: “But I can't dance.”

“I'll lead you. Just hold on to me and trust that I won't let you fall.”

Soobin took his hand: “I know you'd never do that.”

Yeonjun placed Soobin's arms around his waist before wrapping his own arms around Soobin's neck. The song that was playing wasn't exactly made for dancing but somehow it still felt weirdly fitting. They only moved around on the same spot for a while, feet barely moving, before Yeonjun got bolder and started spinning Soobin around and dipping him. They stopped paying attention to the music and instead flew through the field together, letting the sounds of nature be their music instead. Yeonjun didn't let go of his hand once, always making sure that Soobin could follow whatever he was doing and Soobin felt safe although dancing wasn't his strong suit. Above them the sky was burning in bright colours, setting the mood for their dance.

When they stopped to catch their breaths, Soobin felt tired but light as a feather. He couldn't help but laugh happily and Yeonjun looked proud of being the one who had made him so happy.

“We should head back to the car now. There's a motel not far away where we can spend the night and it's starting to get dark”, Yeonjun said, still holding on to Soobin's hand as he bent down to pick up his phone. He didn't let go of his hand, like Soobin had expected, and so they walked to the car hand in hand.

“Did you even pull off the keys?”, Soobin asked when they reached the car. Yeonjun only smiled sheepishly in response and handed him a bottle of water he had gotten from the trunk. He accepted it and downed the water in one go. Yeonjun took the empty bottle and threw it back into the trunk with his own.

Soobin opened the passenger door: “You are so lucky the car wasn't stolen.”

“Please, there's no one here but us. And whoever drives by has a car of their own”, Yeonjun shrugged and settled back into the driver's seat.

“Do you want me to drive now?”

“Nah, it's fine. You don't know where the motel is anyway”, Yeonjun nudged Soobin's shoulder with his own and started the engine. He turned on the radio and started humming along to the song that was playing. Soobin grabbed his phone from where he had left it on his seat – probably not being entirely responsible either – and unlocked it to check for any messages. Taehyun had texted him a few times but he was too lazy to go back and read them all so he only settled for the last one that read: I'm at your place now. Where the hell are you? If you were kidnapped, I'm not paying the ransom.

Soobin smiled and typed a response, letting Taehyun know that he was safe and just out on a trip with Yeonjun. He received a bunch of heart-eyed emojis and a few deviously grinning ones and decided that whatever else Taehyun had to say wasn't important enough for him to pay attention to. He pocketed his phone and turned his head to look out the window. Soon enough the steadily moving view and Yeonjun's soft humming had him slowly drift off to sleep.

Soobin didn't know what time it was when Yeonjun shook him awake but the sun had set and it had gotten dark outside. The air was still warm but not as unbearably hot as it had been throughout the day. Soobin moved a little and cringed when he felt the way his sweat-soaked clothes stuck to his body.

Yeonjun shook his shoulder again: “Come on. I've already checked us in.”

Soobin nodded sleepily and got out of the car. Yeonjun led him to their room and opened the door before letting Soobin step inside first. The room was a little too hot for comfort but it wasn't half as bad as he had expected. There was only one bed but it wasn't unusual for him and Yeonjun to share a bed. They did that regularly whenever Yeonjun would crash at his place because Soobin's apartment was closer to their university anyway.

“Dibs on the shower”, Soobin said while he still examined the room.

He heard Yeonjun groan behind him: “Not fair. I found this place, I should get to shower first.”

Soobin rolled his eyes, they'd had this conversation often enough for him to know that Yeonjun would let him shower first anyway. He grabbed his duffel bag, that Yeonjun had kindly brought with him from the car, and dug around for his toiletry bag. He cheered triumphantly when he found it and took off to the bathroom.

The cold water felt like a blessing on his heated skin and he revelled in the feeling of the cool that spread through his body. He closed his eyes as he rinsed his hair and smiled when he heard Yeonjun sing along to some song he was playing from his phone in the other room. When he came out of the bathroom, dressed in a light shirt and boxers, he found Yeonjun laying on the bed with his feet dangling a little over the edge at the foot of the bed. He had unceremoniously dropped his shirt on the floor and was lounging on the bed half-naked, holding his phone above his face. For a second Soobin thought about scaring him into dropping his phone on his face but then Yeonjun raised his head and spotted him standing at the foot of the bed and his chance was lost.

“You'll never be able to sleep like this, might as well lose the shirt now”, Yeonjun winked at him and Soobin rolled his eyes, nudging him to make space on the bed for him. Yeonjun rolled over on his stomach and yelped when he nearly rolled off the edge of the bed. Soobin laughed and grabbed his arm to steady him. Yeonjun rolled over again but only managed to get on his side before his back collided with Soobin's chest. He heard a quite 'oof' behind himself and started laughing, behind him he could feel Soobin's chest moving as he laughed along.

Soobin pushed a little at his shoulder: “Go take a shower. You're gross.”

Yeonjun turned his head as far as he could and stuck his tongue out at him before he got up and disappeared in the bathroom after rummaging through his stuff for his own toiletry bag. Soobin continued to smile for a while after Yeonjun had disappeared before he grabbed his phone to see if Taehyun had texted him again. Seeing that it was only a bunch of complaints about being ignored, Soobin put his phone down on the bedside table and laid back on the bed, arms crossed behind his head. He was starting to feel too hot again and wondered if the room had air conditioning. He got up from the bed and looked around but beside an out-of-order ceiling fan there wasn't anything they could have used to cool themselves off.

He was still standing in the middle of the room when Yeonjun came out of the bathroom, clad in only his boxer shorts.

“What are you doing?”, he asked while drying his hair with a towel before hanging it around his neck.

Soobin needed a moment before he replied, eyes roaming over Yeonjun's body instead. When he looked back up at his face, Yeonjun was smiling at him.

“I was just looking for air conditioning. This room's getting too hot already.”

“I've got something better”, Yeonjun grabbed the shirt he had discarded earlier from the floor and threw Soobin the shorts he had been wearing all day before putting on a pair of his own. When they were both properly dressed again and Soobin was about to complain that he now felt even hotter than before, Yeonjun grabbed his hand and pulled him outside. He walked him over to his car and hopped up on the hood, patting the space beside him. The air was cooler outside than it had been in the room but still pleasantly warm. Soobin sat down beside Yeonjun and they both leaned back against the windshield. When he leaned back Soobin noticed that Yeonjun had sneaked an arm around his shoulders so he snuggled against him a little. His mouth opened slightly when he looked up and was greeted with a sky that was covered in thousands and thousands of stars. It looked like Huening-Kai's box with face glitter had exploded over the whole sky, covering it in tiny, gleaming specks.

“I've never seen the stars like this. In reality, I mean”, he mumbled quietly, worried that if he spoke any louder the strange, peaceful spell that had settled over them might break.

“Me neither. That's what we get for staying in the city all our lives”, Yeonjun answered equally as quietly.

“We should get out of the city more often.”

“Let's.”

After a while Soobin whispered: “I feel so small.”

“Well, we are small. You know, in the grand scheme of things”, Yeonjun mumbled.

“It's kind of comforting, don't you think? To know that we're actually nothing more than small specks floating on a rock in the infinite space of the universe. It makes our issues seem a lot smaller somehow and kind of puts things into perspective.”

“I never thought about it like that. I always thought that it's actually kind of scary.”

“Why?”, Soobin tried to turn his head so he could look at Yeonjun but the angle was too awkward so he settled for just listening to his voice instead.

Yeonjun hesitated for a moment, trying to find the right words: “I think it's scary to be small. It means that there are bigger things out there and it just makes everything seem kind of futile. It doesn't really matter what we do because our actions don't really change anything when you look at the bigger picture. We're have pretty much no actual control over what happens because we're so small.”

“I know what you mean. But when things get scary, it sometimes helps to change your perspective. Because while everything you're saying is true and absolutely valid, our actions having little impact in the grand scheme of things also takes a lot of the pressure off. It gives us the freedom to do what we want because in the end, none of this matters. We all meet our end eventually and then nobody asks what you have done with your life and you have no advantage for, say, sacrificing your life for your work or something. If everything is futile, we might as well enjoy ourselves”, Soobin shrugged.

Yeonjun mulled his words over in his head for a moment, then he smiled: “How do you always know what I need to hear?”

“I guess, I just know you that well.”

“You do”, Yeonjun pulled him a little tighter against him and Soobin smiled.

A comfortable silence settled over them as they looked up at the sky and tried to make out constellations. A warm breeze brushed over their bodies and Soobin thought that if he were to die today, he'd die as the happiest person on the planet. He only reluctantly allowed Yeonjun to lead him back to their room, gently tugging at his hand to get him to move, when both of them started to get sleepy.

Back in their room Yeonjun immediately rid himself of his shirt and shorts before crawling into bed. After a moment's hesitation Soobin did the same and settled in behind Yeonjun, wrapping his arm around his waist. Sharing a bed with Yeonjun on more occasions than he could count had taught him that they would wake up completely entangled with each other anyway.

He buried his nose in Yeonjun's hair and frowned: “Did you use my shampoo?”

Yeonjun made an affirmative noise, already drifting off to sleep: “Smells nice. Smells like you.”

Soobin smiled and snuggled a little closer against him. He was probably going to regret getting so close in the morning with how warm it still was but that didn't matter one bit if it meant he got to be close to Yeonjun.

He woke up the next morning with Yeonjun entirely wrapped around him. His arms where tightly wound around his chest, his head comfortably cushioned on his chest and his legs had trapped Soobin's, leaving him unable to move a muscle without waking Yeonjun. The room was cast in a soft orange glow and Soobin belatedly realised that they had forgotten to close the blinds the night before. He admired the way the sunlight made Yeonjun's skin look like it was glowing and the way it cast shadows on his soft features. An old digital clock on the nightstand told him that it was only six a.m. but he felt incredibly awake. Yeonjun mumbled something in his sleep which was a sure sign that he was slowly starting to wake up. Soobin smiled down at him and moved to gently brush a strand of hair from his forehead. Yeonjun started to stir now and a few moments later his eyes blinked open. He smiled sleepily when the first thing he saw was Soobin's face looking down at him. He closed his eyes again for a moment and sighed in content, his breath tickling Soobin's chest and making him squirm a little.

“Good morning”, Soobin whispered quietly, brushing another strand of hair behind Yeonjun's ear.

“I've woken up like this so often, but I'll never get sick of waking up to your face”, Yeonjun mumbled, voice muffled against Soobin's chest.

An overwhelming warmth bloomed in Soobin's chest. He wanted to return the sentiment but Yeonjun's messy bedhead and sleepy voice left him tongue-tied. He resolved to running his hand through the soft strands of his hair instead, massaging his head a little. Yeonjun sighed in content and let his eyes fall shut again. Soobin considered himself the luckiest person on the planet because he got to see Yeonjun like this.

They remained like this for a while until Soobin's stomach growled loudly. He hadn't even realised that he hadn't eaten anything since his late lunch the day before.

Yeonjun laughed and slowly pushed himself into a sitting position, using Soobin's chest for support: “Sounds like someone's hungry.”

“I haven't eaten anything for like half a day, I'm starving”, Soobin whined. He laughed when Yeonjun playfully slapped his chest.

“Then we should get showered and get out of here. There's a town pretty close by where I'm sure we can get some food.”

“Dibs on the shower!”, Soobin pushed him out of the way and struggled his way out of bed.

“Not fair! You did that yesterday already!”, Yeonjun yelled, scrambling off the bed to get to the bathroom faster than Soobin. They collided with each other at the bathroom door and Soobin quickly wrapped his arms around Yeonjun so he wouldn't fall.

“Let's just shower together, then we'll be done faster. Wouldn't be the first time.” Yeonjun shrugged at the suggestion, freed himself from Soobin's arms and started peeling off his boxers while already making his way to the shower.

“What are you waiting for then?”, he asked, looking over his shoulder as he stepped into the shower and turned on the water.

Soobin smiled and followed him. He winced when he got into the shower and immediately complained about Yeonjun always showering way too cold.

“Shut up, it's refreshing and good for the circulation, you big baby”, Yeonjun splashed some water in his direction and Soobin whined again, “come here, I'll shampoo your hair for you.”

“Aren't you going to need a stepping stool for that?”, Soobin bit his lip in an attempt not to laugh out loud when he saw Yeonjun's scowling face. He smiled apologetically but Yeonjun pinched his arm anyway. Soobin yelped and Yeonjun seemed satisfied with himself as he began massaging the shampoo into his hair. Soobin closed his eyes and enjoyed Yeonjun's gentle ministrations until he was satisfied with his work. Afterwards, he returned the favour and soon enough they were both showered and dressed. Soobin gave the room a quick once over to make sure they hadn't forgotten anything while Yeonjun brought their stuff back to the car.

The radio was playing softly in the background when Soobin slid into the passenger seat and Yeonjun was quietly singing along again. Soobin smiled and joined in on his singing. Yeonjun turned his head to him and smiled brightly, admiring how beautiful Soobin's face looked in the gentle glow of the early morning light. Yeonjun started the engine, already having typed the address to their next destination into the navigation system, and pulled out of the parking lot. They spend the drive singing their hearts out to whatever song was playing on the radio, regardless of whether they knew the lyrics or not.

Soobin was giving an especially passionate rendition of the song currently playing when Yeonjun pulled into a parking lot and stopped the engine. He got out of the car and walked around it to open the passenger door for Soobin. He got a bright smile in return and had to break out into a grin himself.

Soobin looked around, taking in the sight of the town Yeonjun had taken them to. It was a cute little town – clearly leaning more on the traditional side than the modern one, unlike the city he was used to – and he found that he liked it a lot.

“I can always trust your taste”, he said and Yeonjun grinned.

“Well, obviously. I have impeccable taste-”, he took Soobin's hand, “-come on, we still have to walk a little.”

They slowly walked along the pavement – hands intertwined – and took in their new surroundings. Soobin felt like the air was a lot less heavy than what he was used to from the city and he felt like every breath he took served to regenerate his mind and his body. It felt like heaven on earth to be here, with Yeonjun and just exist with him in their own little corner of the world. The heat was much more bearable this early in the day and he decided he enjoyed the sun a lot more like this; he preferred it gently warming his skin rather than making him feel like it was about to burn it off if he was outside for too long.

He jumped up on a low wall that lined the pavement on their left side, trying to balance on it. Yeonjun's grip on his hand tightened a little, helping him steady himself from time to time. He giggled happily while balancing along the wall. When he looked over, he saw that Yeonjun was looking at him with a warm smile. When they reached the restaurant Yeonjun had found online, he helped Soobin down and then led him inside. Soobin shuddered at the cold air inside the restaurant after having gotten used to the warmth of the sun on his skin while walking outside.

There weren't many people inside, just two elderly couples and a group of three or four younger people. The atmosphere was calm and homely and Soobin immediately took a liking to the place. While he was still taking in the new surroundings Yeonjun had organised them a table beside a window, so they could look out on the street, and two menus. Soobin's stomach growled loudly as he read over all the delicious dishes the restaurant had to offer, making Yeonjun laugh.

They sat in comfortable silence while they waited for their food. Yeonjun had gotten his phone from his pocket, no doubt texting Beomgyu, and Soobin decided that it was probably long overdue for him to give Taehyun a little update.

When their food was brought out his mouth nearly watered a little at the sight. It must have shown on his face because both, Yeonjun and the waitress serving them, laughed a little at the sight of his face. He blushed a little and hid his face behind his hands but Yeonjun gently pried them away. Afterwards they only paid attention to their food for a while, too hungry to really focus on making conversation with each other. When they got their dessert, they felt a lot more like themselves again.

“I'm glad you made me do this”, Soobin said, before stuffing his face with a massive spoonful of his dessert.

“Yeah?”, Yeonjun reached over and dug his spoon into Soobin's food, giving him a cheeky grin when he withdrew the spoon and tasted it.

Soobin nodded in confirmation and gathered some of his dessert on his spoon before feeding it to Yeonjun: “You could have just ordered the same thing I did.”

Yeonjun shrugged, still grinning: “But that's not nearly as much fun. Here, you can try mine, too.”

He reached over and offered Soobin a spoonful of his own dessert. Soobin licked his lips and hummed happily, Yeonjun had made a good pick.

“This is so much nicer than wasting away in my apartment while I wait for classes to start again or the heat to go away, which ever would have come first.”

“I'm glad you agreed to come along. You're always so cautious, I was worried you'd say no.”

“I guess you bring out the worst in me”, Soobin accusingly waved his spoon in Yeonjun's direction. But he only laughed, dipped his finger into his dessert and smeared it on Soobin's nose. Soobin pulled a face and grabbed a napkin to wipe his nose. One of the elderly couples looked at them indignantly and he blushed a little, quickly averting his eyes and focusing on Yeonjun instead.

“I'm just making you live a little. Nothing wrong with that. You'd miss out on so much if I didn't force you to come and do stuff with me every once in a while”, Yeonjun teased and Soobin unfortunately had to admit that was true.

They finished their meal and Yeonjun insisted on paying their bill. They headed back out into the sun that was burning a lot brighter and hotter now than it had earlier and decided to take a look around before taking off again. To be fairly honest, Yeonjun wasn't hugely interested in what the town had to offer but Soobin was excited about it and any excuse to keep holding his hand was a good excuse.

They explored little shops that offered all kinds of trinkets that had seen better days and natural herbs of all sorts; tiny, cramped bookshops; an old antique shop; and went for some ice cream when they were done with their little tour. They walked along the roads, still holding hands, and happily ate their ice cream before they returned to the car.

By lunchtime they were back on the road. Soobin had bought a couple of sandwiches for them in the town's grocery store so they would have something to eat for lunch and dinner. Yeonjun had rolled down the windows again and the warm wind was messing with Soobin's hair while he tried to read one of the new books he had gotten for himself in the small shop they had found. They drove in relative silence. Yeonjun was focusing on the road while Soobin read and only the softly playing radio disrupted the silence.

After several hours spend driving on mostly deserted streets, they reached another town where Yeonjun had found a small hotel for them to stay at. It wasn't the most fancy thing in the world but breakfast was included in the price and the room was as clean as they could expect. They showered one after the other and then ate the second batch of sandwiches that Soobin had bought. Despite the little sleep they had gotten the night before, neither of them felt tired or really willing to sleep. So Yeonjun got a pack of playing cards and a bottle of soju from his bag and they started to play.

“Draw four”, Yeonjun said triumphantly and slammed his card down on the bed.

Soobin grinned deviously: “Draw six.”

Yeonjun cursed under his breath and start to collect the cards. Soobin ended up winning the game. They played the second game in relative silence, wordlessly passing the bottle between each other.

“Do you sometimes get scared?”, Yeonjun suddenly asked, intensely focused on his cards like picking the right one to play was the most important decision he'd ever make in his life.

“Scared of what?”, Soobin looked up from his own cards.

“Life. The future. Being young and having to get old.”

Soobin took a swig from the soju bottle and handed it to Yeonjun who did the same.

“Of course. I mean, who isn't right? Being young is scary. There's so much stuff we have to figure out and so many things that are expected from us. We're supposed to be hard-working, diligent, successful, humble, pick the right career, do right by our families, do right by our friends, do right by our country; and all the while we're meant to put on a happy face and act like there's nothing better in the world than a life like that. That's scary. And pretty daunting.”

Yeonjun nodded slowly and took another swig from the bottle: “Do you think we'll make it? Graduating, finding a job, having a somewhat stable life?”

“Sure. Why wouldn't we? And even if we don't, it's not the end of the world. We decide what our lives are going to look like and what we consider desirable and successful. It's all up to us. That's comforting and scary at the same time but it gives us a lot more freedom and opportunity than treating the 'conventional' way as the only way.”

“And what about us? Do you think we'll last?”

Soobin put his hand on top of Yeonjun's, making him put down his playing cards and interlacing their fingers, while using the other to lift his chin and make him look at him: “Of course we will. We're best friends and we're always going to be together. We basically have our life together planned out anyway. You get your dance studio, I'll get my flower shop and we'll have two dogs and a cat. There is nothing in the world that could take me away from you. Nothing, you hear me? No matter what happens, all you have to do is look next to you and I'll be right there.”

Yeonjun smiled and leaned into the soft touch of Soobin's hand on his cheek, briefly closing his eyes.

“Why all these questions though? You always seem like you don't even know what the word 'fear' means”, Soobin said, trying to sound light-hearted as to not make Yeonjun think that he was wrong for expressing himself.

Yeonjun sighed, sinking a little further into Soobin's gentle touch: “I guess, I didn't just want to get away from the heat. If I'm honest with myself, I think I was trying to run away from the future and my own insecurities as well. It all seems so far away and small now that I'm out of the city and it's just you and me together and nothing else matters. It's easier to feel like everything's going to be fine like this. There's so much pressure and everyone's pulling at you from every direction, sometimes I just feel like I can't handle this. Any of this. Life is hard and scary, and sometimes I'm scared I'm not cut out for this.”

“Of course you are. You can do anything you set your mind to, I've seen it first hand. Remember when your parents said that you were never going to get into your dream university because you didn't want to learn ballet but more contemporary dancing styles? And you tried anyway and got in. Or that time you thought you'd fail this really important exam although you had been studying for it for weeks. And you ended up acing it. Or when you thought your life was over because you failed like two classes in one term and in the end you managed to make up for it in the next one. No matter what you do and no matter what happens, you will be fine. And I'm here and I'll hold your hand all the way through it. It's normal and okay to be scared and to doubt yourself and your ability to live a life that makes you happy. But I know that you will be fine. There is no right or wrong way to do this. There is no manual. Your way is your way and wherever it may take you, I'll support you.”

“I'm so glad you're my friend.”

“So am I.”

“No, seriously. You don't know how much it means to know that you're always in my corner.”

Yeonjun crawled across the bed so he could sit closer to Soobin and lean against his shoulder. He wasn't always great at expressing himself but he knew that Soobin understood either way.

Soobin wrapped his arms tightly around his torso and pulled him closer against him: “I always will be.”

They sat like that for a while, not minding that is was way too warm in the room for them to be that close and still be fully dressed. They emptied the bottle of soju together and then got ready for bed in relative silence, safe for a few words about who would brush their teeth first. When both of them had gotten ready for bed, they snuggled up together and listened to each other's breathing until both had fallen asleep.

They woke up to the sun peaking through the curtains they had remembered to close this time. Yeonjun blinked against the light that hit his face and tried to hide against Soobin's neck. He heard him giggle, his breath probably tickling him. They laid in silence for a while, limbs intertwined and eyes still heavy with sleep. Yeonjun was very glad they hadn't opened that second bottle of soju and instead had gone to bed. Eventually he felt Soobin's body move and before he could really react he slid out under him.

“No”, Yeonjun whined and tried to grab his arm but he hadn't assessed the distance correctly and ended up grabbing only air, “come back.”

He heard Soobin laugh as he buried his face in the pillow, breathing in the faint scent of Soobin's shampoo.

“If we ever want to get to the sea, we have to get up eventually.”

Yeonjun groaned and pressed his face even further into the pillow. He could practically see the way Soobin was fondly shaking his head at him right now.

By the time Soobin came back from the bathroom, Yeonjun had fallen asleep again. Soobin shook his head and then jumped on the bed but made sure not to actually jump on Yeonjun so he wouldn't hurt him. Yeonjun bounced up on the mattress a little and let out a string of curses because he had been woken up so abruptly. He heard Soobin laugh and grabbed the next best pillow, slamming it in his face. A surprised noise escaped Soobin's lips but it was muffled by the pillow that Yeonjun was currently trying to suffocate him with. Quickly Soobin grabbed a pillow himself and blindly hit in whatever direction he suspected Yeonjun to be in. Soon enough their little squabble had evolved into a full on pillow fight. They ran around the room, jumped on the bed and back down and nearly knocked over the armchair in the corner, twice.

Eventually both of them fell back on the bed, feeling exhausted but happy.

“We'll miss out on breakfast if we don't hurry”, Soobin wheezed, trying to get enough air back into his lungs.

“Just five more minutes. If I stand up now, I'll just collapse anyway.”

“Shouldn't your stamina be better? You know, being a dancer and all?”, a pillow hit his face and he laughed.

“I don't have to listen to this slander”, Yeonjun huffed and struggled to sit up.

By the time he was showered they were really late for breakfast. They ran down the stairs giggling, chasing each other to see which one of them could get there first.

After making quick work of their breakfast, they returned to their room to pack their things again.

Soobin looked inside his duffel bag unhappily: “I did not bring enough clothes for how long this trip is still going to be.”

“Relax, we'll get to the sea today.”

“Yeah, but we still have to get back home again.”

Yeonjun's brows drew together as he thought about what Soobin had said. Then he pulled out his phone: “According to the internet there should be a laundromat just down the street. We can stop there before we get the car.”

“Yeonjun, you don't know how to do laundry. You always come over to my place and make me do it.”

“Well, then this is the perfect moment for you to teach me”, Yeonjun stuck his tongue out at him and put his phone away.

Soobin zipped up his bag and shouldered it: “Well, lead the way then.”

After Yeonjun had handled their check-out, they made their way down the street to the laundromat. Yeonjun pushed the door open and was positively surprised when he found it empty: “Good, then no one can judge me for my failed attempts.”

Soobin put his bag down on a table and opened it to get his dirty clothing. He had organized his bag before they left the hotel so the dirty clothing was laying on top and was easy to grab. Yeonjun on the other hand rummaged through his bag for quite a while in search for his clothes that he had haphazardly thrown in. For the longest time he could only find one of his socks until Soobin told him that it had been hanging halfway out the side of his bag for the better part of five minutes now. Yeonjun laughed and shrugged, he couldn't really be that bothered about it. If his sock had disappeared forever, his life would have still been the same. He left the sorting of the washing to Soobin but made sure to watch extra closely when he put in the laundry detergent to show Soobin that he was very serious about learning how to do laundry, although he really wasn't. Soobin only shoved his shoulder and slammed the doors of the two washing machines shut.

Yeonjun dropped down on one of the chairs and sighed: “I'm bored now.”

“Oh my god, we just turned the machines on. Don't be such a baby. You can have one of my new books, it'll keep you occupied.”

“But I don't want to read”, Yeonjun complained, kicking his feet like a little child.

Soobin sighed exasperatedly. Then he walked over to where Yeonjun was sitting, picked him up with ease and set him down on one of the tables that their open bags were still sitting on. He stepped in between Yeonjun's legs, hugged his waist and leaned his head against his shoulder.

Then he mumbled: “Be nice.”

Yeonjun seemed frozen for a moment before he wrapped his arms around Soobin's shoulders and rested his chin on the crown of his head: “Sorry.”

Soobin chuckled lightly and buried his face a little further in Yeonjun's chest. They remained like that for a while, just holding on to each other without worrying about who might be looking inside through the huge windows. When Soobin got tired of standing he stepped back and let Yeonjun slide off the table. Yeonjun dug out his phone from his bag and Soobin grabbed one of his books. Then they both settled down on the chairs. Yeonjun laid down over three chairs so he could lay his head in Soobin's lap who absentmindedly played with his hair with one hand while the other held his book. It was a nice way to pass the time until the machines made a noise to signal that they had run through. Yeonjun only lifted his head, not taking his eyes off his phone screen to let Soobin get up and put the clothes in the dryer. When he came back Yeonjun lifted his head again so he could sit back down.

When the laundry was finally done, both of them stood up and sorted through it to determine which clothes belonged to whom.

“With you, even doing laundry is fun”, Yeonjun said smiling when he had finally crammed all his stuff back into his bag.

“You didn't even do anything”, Soobin retaliated and Yeonjun laughed. “Now let's get back to the car. You promised we'd reach the sea today and I hold you to that.”

Yeonjun saluted and the two left the laundromat, irritating a few people that walked by with their loud laughter. By the time that they reached the car, it was already well into the early afternoon and Soobin was starting to worry they wouldn't be able to reach the sea today after all.

When they were on the road again, Soobin rested his chin in his palm and looked outside the window, watching the landscape pass by. Knowing that they were nearing the sea, he thought he could almost feel a slightly salty breeze in the air already when in actuality the air was heavy and his shirt was sticking to his body. Although the air-conditioning was turned all the way up, he was sweating like crazy. Soobin raised his head a little when he heard the distant rumble of thunder. He turned his head to look at Yeonjun: “Should we be worried?”

“Nah, don't worry”, Yeonjun smiled reassuringly. “It might rain but I'm sure the thunderstorm won't reach us.”

Before he had even finished his sentence the first raindrops began hitting the windshield.

“I hope you're right”, Soobin turned his head back to the window, “it looks kind of pretty though, doesn't it?”

Yeonjun nodded, although he wasn't really paying attention to the way the rain and the sunshine meshed together were probably creating a rainbow right now; he was thinking to himself that Soobin looked stunning in this light.

Soobin's gaze grew longing: “You know, I've always wanted to dance in the rain with someone.”

His words seemed to be directed more to himself than to Yeonjun but Yeonjun immediately began mulling over the idea in his head. The sunlight hitting the rain on the windshield created little rainbows if Yeonjun tilted his head just right and he thought about what it might be like to dance with Soobin in the rain. They'd had a lot of fun dancing with each other in the field but rain was an entirely different thing. He saw an open space between two fields coming into view at the side of the road, took another look at Soobin and his impulsiveness did the rest. Yeonjun pulled over to the side of the road, startling Soobin slightly.

“What- why did we stop?”

Yeonjun unbuckled his seatbelt and turned his upper body so he could look at Soobin: “Would you let me be your someone?”

Soobin blinked a few times and then blushed when he caught on: “Uh- I...”

Yeonjun extended his hand and smiled softly.

“But we don't have any music.”

“We don't need music.”

A smile slowly appeared on Soobin's face and he took Yeonjun's hand: “I wouldn't want it to be anyone else.”

Reluctantly Yeonjun let go of Soobin's hand, after squeezing it once, and exited the car. The rain felt like pure relief on his heated skin and made him feel a little less light-headed. Soobin had already opened the passenger door when Yeonjun had rounded the car but was waiting for Yeonjun to help him out nonetheless. He took his hand with a smile and allowed Yeonjun to lead him to the open space. The rain quickly soaked them to the bone but it was a welcome change to the heavy, sticky heat. Soobin closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of the warm summer rain on his face for a moment. When he opened his eyes Yeonjun was standing in front of him, smiling brightly. He pushed Soobin's wet fringe, that was stuck to his face, gently to the side and then put his free hand on his shoulder while the other still held his hand.

“I trust you to lead me”, Soobin heard him whisper softly over the rain. Soobin took a deep breath. He had no idea how to lead Yeonjun but he was certain he would follow whatever he did. With a smile he put his arm around Yeonjun's waist and pulled him closer until their chests were touching. Soobin carefully moved his right leg forward, trying to imagine what kind of song they would be dancing to if they had music, and Yeonjun caught on instantly, moving his left leg back. Soobin could almost see the way Yeonjun let himself fall, putting himself entirely into his hands, which meant more to Soobin than he could express. Yeonjun was used to taking the lead and being the one in control and Soobin knew just how difficult it was for him to let go and allow someone else to take over. The fact that he trusted Soobin to lead him and felt safe enough with him to relinquish control, was the most beautiful and meaningful way he could show Soobin how much he meant to him.

They moved through the rain at their own pace and to a melody only they could hear. With every step Soobin felt braver and when Yeonjun smiled up at him, he felt brave enough to lift him into the air and spin him around before setting him back down and continuing their dance. Yeonjun laughed and closed his eyes, and Soobin could feel his heart swell in his chest. In the distance he could hear thunder rumbling but this time he paid it no mind.

The rain slowly ceased and the sun broke through again. Their movements became slower until they stopped but they didn't let go of each other just yet. Yeonjun took a deep breath and then threw his arms around Soobin's neck to hug him tightly. Soobin smiled and wound his arms around his waist.

When Yeonjun pulled back he was smiling so brightly his eyes crinkled up: “That was fun.”

“Yes, it was”, Soobin brushed a few wet strands of hair behind Yeonjun's ear.

“We should probably get going now, if we still want to get to the sea today.”

“But we're soaking wet.”

Yeonjun laughed and shrugged: “The car's seen worse.”

They returned to the car and a little while later they were back on the road.

By the time the evening rolled around, they were all dry again and, according to Yeonjun, closer to the sea than ever. When he saw the first traces of dunes lining the road through the window, Soobin's heart jumped in excitement. He turned so he could look out the windshield just in time to see the blue of the sea appear on the horizon. He excitedly hit Yeonjun's arm a few times: “We're here!”

“I know, I can see”, Yeonjun rubbed the sore spot on his arm. He couldn't help but smile at Soobin's childlike excitement. He drove down to the sea as closely as he could and then shut off the engine. This time Soobin didn't even bother to wait for Yeonjun to help him out of the car. He burst out of the passenger door as soon as the car stood still and raced down the last few steps, throwing his shoes while running and almost falling over in the process, until the water hit his bare feet. He shivered and turned around, calling for Yeonjun to hurry.

Yeonjun jogged after him laughing, took his shoes off and then joined him at the water. He took Soobin's hand and smiled at him. Soobin returned the smile and then closed his eyes, letting the breeze of the sea wash over him. Yeonjun admired the way the sun cast shadows on his face and how his face was practically glowing with the excitement of finally having reached the sea, and the sun shining down on them. The sky was starting to change colour, announcing the approaching sunset. When Soobin opened his eyes the sky was burning in orange, yellow and red as the sun slowly sank closer to the horizon.

Yeonjun tugged at his hand: “We can go swimming in a second. But it'll be nicer to sit down while watching the sunset.”

Soobin nodded and let Yeonjun lead him back to the car. Both of them settled down on the hood the same way they had done when they were watching the stars on the first night of their road trip. Soobin's fingers slowly inched closer to Yeonjun's as the sun inched closer towards the line where the sky hit the sea but it was Yeonjun who took the final step and interlaced their fingers on top of the hood.

Soobin looked down at their hands and then up at Yeonjun with a soft smile: “Thank you for taking me here.”

Yeonjun looked at him and appreciated the way the last few rays of the sun reflected in his beautiful eyes: “Thank you for coming with me.”

Soobin's lips parted slightly. His mouth suddenly felt very dry and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. The corners of Yeonjun's lips pulled up into a fond smile. The sun had almost reached the horizon when Yeonjun leaned in closer until his face was right in front of Soobin's. Soobin held his breath. He wasn't sure what was going to happen but he didn't want to do anything that could break the moment he had been waiting for for so long.

Yeonjun's eyes drifted up to Soobin's, holding his gaze and looking for any sign that what he was about to do was not what Soobin wanted after all; but he found nothing but quiet adoration and perhaps even more than that. And so, when the sun finally met the sea, Yeonjun's lips gently met Soobin's. He reached up to cup Soobin's cheek with his free hand, while Soobin reached out to steady himself on Yeonjun's shoulder, completely overwhelmed by everything he was feeling. He was disappointed when Yeonjun slowly pulled back but when he opened his eyes Yeonjun was still right in front of him, gently pressing their foreheads together. Soobin couldn't help but laugh a little, he needed a way to release all the warmth that was blooming in his chest. To his relief Yeonjun laughed as well, briefly closing his eyes and then quickly opening them again because he didn't want to miss a single detail about Soobin in this moment.

“That was long overdue, wasn't it?”, Yeonjun eventually whispered.

“I think it was.”

For a few moments they just looked at each other. Taking in the other's face, appreciating each other's presence as the sun disappeared and the sky slowly turned dark. The first stars were starting to peak out from beneath the few clouds in the sky.

“We should do this again next year”, Soobin whispered, still unwilling to break the magical moment between them.

Yeonjun smiled: “Let's.”