Chapter Text
It was all she ever ate, pot noodle.
It was all Pacifica could afford. Ridiculous, she thought. The twenty-two year old student had put herself in debt for the rest of her life and all she was getting out of it was a cramped apartment and cheap food. Though, if she was being honest, she had grown affection for it. The pot noodle vending machine was always available, every day of the week, between every lesson. There were many options for her too, a lot of different seasonings so each one could be different. She’d never have the same variation twice a day.
Due to circumstances, all her curriculums were done over her place’s favoured facetime app: Bermuda. Her professors would go over all the useless information they had to offer before ending the call and allowing her to lay on her bed alone. Pacifica was worn out; she could nap for hours. She checked the clock; it was only five. Right then.
Pacifica managed to open the door out of her apartment. With her eyes almost dead, she leaned forward as her arms loosely bounced. Before her at the end of the hall of doors, she saw the vending machine. She sheepishly opened her purse and pulled out a quarter. As she went to insert, her eye’s widened in horror at the sight in front of her. The vending machine was empty. Pacifica dropped forward. Her face now pressed against the glass.
“Why… Why?” she moaned. “Just one… small… tub. Is it really too much to ask for one quick and easy to cook product?”
She turned and slid to the floor. Now what was she going to do? What could she eat? Determined, she ran down to the reception. There, she saw a hairy and elderly gentleman sat behind the desk. The man had big shoulders. He looked miserable; she could relate.
Pacifica cleared her throat. “Sir,” she started, “do you know when the noodle machine upstairs will be refilled?
The man frowned. “I’m sorry, madam. But I don’t think it will be anytime soon. They’ve cancelled distribution throughout this whole state.”
Pacifica gasped. “What? Why?! H- how? How am I supposed to eat? I can’t buy sandwiches from Walmart! I’d never be able to pay rent!” She started to pant loudly.
“Hey!” the man tried to assure. “It’s just- for the time being. It’s- going to take time, but I’m- sure it will… damn it!”
Pacifica looked up as the gentlemen seemed just as deranged as her. At least someone understood, she thought. “It’s- uggh, it’s fine. I’ll… find something else.”
As she slowly walked away with her head down, the man called to her. “Wait!”
She stopped and turned her head back to him. “What? What is it?”
“I… I may have something that would interest you- but, it may also scar you for life.”
Pacifica rolled her eyes. “Please, if you’d known the shit I’ve seen in my life.”
The man gave her an unimpressed look. “Well then, if you think you’ve seen it all.” He looked around. “Follow me.”
The man took her to the basement below the flat. Thought it looked more like a dungeon. Suddenly, the man seemed to remove his own face. To Pacifica’s shock, his whole body began to flicker off, like a hologram. Finally, stood before was an extremely hairy creature, almost human like. It was definitely a primate of some sort with really long tusk like teeth.
“I should probably introduce myself; I am Sal Squachatin. Or Sasquatch as some of you humans call me.”
Pacifica took a step back. “You’re- you’re Bigfoot?!”
Sal flopped. He now gave her an unamused expression. “Please, let’s not be racist. Let me explain the situation here. I have been working a few jobs in the last year. I have contacts with the company that creates those pot noodles. However, they seem to have lost interest in this part of the world, preferring to sell them to more profitable places.”
“What’s more profitable that an apartment of severely underfunded students?” the blonde asked.
Sal sighed. “The Yetis.”
Pacifica blinked. “Yetis? Wait, you mean they’ve stopped selling my noodles because of you?!”.
Pacifica stared at the beast, enraged. She’d forgotten the fact that she’d just met Bigfoot, he’d taken fer only food, and now she was going to starve.
Sal raised his hands. “No! Not exactly. You see, it was I who ordered the noodle vendor. But… once the Yetis discovered that I had been buying goods and transferring them to my businesses, they bribed the Ra-men to end the deals here and send all their remaining products to Canada.”
“Canada?!” yelled Pacifica. “Those… bastards. They think they’re so precious with their legal weed and superior healthcare! I hope bears maul every one of them.”
She looked up to see Sal staring back at her; he was a looking a little distressed at her comment. “That’s a little harsh. However, I have plan… sort of.”
Pacifica folded her arms and raised an eyebrow. “And what plan would that be?”
“There’s a few things that the Yetis have taken from me. I’ve been meaning to raid their fortress and take some of it back. What do you say? I’ve been needing someone to go with me. One who can scout out the place, you know?”
“What? To Canada? How can I go there? I have classes, Sal!”
“You’ll be home before your next group call. Is that what they call it? Trust me, my jet can get to the highest peak of that pompous country in like- two hours.”
Pacifica blinked. “I’m sorry, jet?”
Sal pressed a button on the wall, and it began to slide open. Suddenly, Pacifica saw before her, a small jet with a cockpit big enough for four.
At this point, her jaw might as well have hit the floor. “You- you have a plane? An actual high-tech plane?”
“Well of course. How else could I be spotted in so many countries?”
Pacifica wished she could answer that question.