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INT. GARAK'S SHOP
Rom is walking back and forth. For a moment he debates going
into Garak's shop. But he pauses, changes his mind and walks
away. He does this again, and again. Garak politely pretends
not to notice Rom while busying himself with trying a scarf
onto a mannequin. Rom once again, tries and leaves, Garak
sighs and shakes his head. Rom changes his mind again, and
approaches the store once more with determination. Rom's
resolve quickly fades, but as Rom makes his escape
GARAK
May I help with you something?
Rom stops, awkward he's been caught.
ROM
Ugh...
GARAK
Are you looking for something in
particular? May I interest you in a
new coat?
Rom nods nervously but says nothing.
GARAK
Ah a coat then, what is the special
occasion?
Tension fills Rom's body, and he doesn't say anything.
GARAK
A secret occasion? A secret lover
perhaps? All secrets stay with me.
ROM
Not a lover!
GARAK
Alright, then not a date?
ROM
Yes, and no. It's not a date. But
it is.
GARAK
I don't follow.
ROM
It could be a date. But it isn't a
date.
GARAK
Ah, are you working yourself up to
asking Leeta out?
ROM
No!
Rom pauses, and then relents.
ROM
Yes...
GARAK
Wonderful. Where are you taking
her?
ROM
I'm not taking her anywhere.
GARAK
So you still haven't asked yet.
ROM
She works for my brother and it's
not right.
GARAK
Yes, but you don't work for your
brother.
ROM
I know, but... it's that... She's
so nice and smart and funny...
I'm...
GARAK
You're afraid she'll say no?
ROM
Worse! What if she says yes?
GARAK
Ah, the most terrifying
possibility, getting what you want.
What is the grand occasion?
ROM
A dance. She invited a bunch of her
friends, and me. It's a formal in
the holosuites
GARAK
I'd already had some requests for
that dance.
ROM
It's based on an Earth story. About
a princess and a ball. There's some
kind of shoe involved, but if the
shoe fits you have marry the
prince. Or you are cursed to sleep
because there's an nail in the shoe
put there by umm a ...Klingon...?
GARAK
Earth fairy tales. How lovely. Who
are you playing?
ROM
I don't think anyone is playing
anyone. I think we are all going to
the party to dance.
GARAK
I see... a guest. But who are you
in the story?
ROM
No one special. Only myself.
GARAK
Come now, we can do better than
that. An Earth fairy tale. Why not
a Prince?
ROM
But I'm not a prince.
GARAK
A duke, a count or baron?
ROM
I don't know what those are.
GARAK
Count Rom of the Rainy valley of
Ferenginar. Summoned to the court
for his ability to fix anything. A
master engineer.
ROM
Yeah... yeah.. I can play that!
GARAK
Well then, we have the role, but
not the wardrobe. What were you
thinking?
ROM
Something nice. Something ... I'd
look smart in. Ummm gold?
GARAK
I see...
Garak thinks for a moment, and walks around Rom looking him
up and down. Taking measurements and beginning to build a
picture in his mind of a stately Rom.
GARAK
Ah, yes, yes. Hmmm
Rom begins to look uncomfortable, and then defeated.
ROM
I know it's never going to work.
GARAK
Oh I didn't say that. We have a lot
of work with. I can make you
something perfect for the evening.
Rest assured that Leeta will see
you.
ROM
Oh no! No no no!
GARAK
No?
ROM
Too much, No. Nope. I can't
Rom leave the shop, and Garak doesn't go to stop him. Garak
breathes deeply and as he exhales, and Rom reappears, and
walks into the shop very quickly. He slaps a few slips of
latiunum, on the table, more than Garak expected.
ROM
Alright do it.
GARAK
Fantastic. You can pick up next
week.
Rom hesitates again and begins to regret this decision and
goes to pick up his money.
GARAK
There are no refunds or exchanges,
the deal is final.
Rom shifts awkwardly and goes to pretend to count the latinum
ROM
Yes of course. I wanted to make
sure I gave you enough.
GARAK
No matter what you cannot cancel
this garment.
ROM
Ughhhhh.
GARAK
It would be an insult to me and to
the money you spent to let this
garment go to waste.
ROM
It would be a waste of money... No
matter what I have to go.
GARAK
Yes, you do.
Garak smiles his sweet yet terrifying smile. Rom awkwardly
shifts and begins to exit Garak's shop. The heavy realization
that he will have to attend the ball dawning on him.
ROM
Next week you said.
GARAK
Correct.
ROM
Next week... ugh thank you.
Garak continues his sweet deadly smile and bows a little but
keeps eye contact.
GARAK
You're welcome.
Rom finally gives in. And openly panics. He can't control the
volume of his voice.
ROM
But what am I suppose to do?
GARAK
It's a human fairy tale ball?
ROM
Yes.
GARAK
Then you dance and try not to get
poisoned.
ROM
But I don't even know how to dance.
What if I step on her feet? How do
I ask her to dance?
Garak bows and gestures to Rom.
GARAK
May I have this dance?
Rom looks around confused. Wondering who Garak is asking. Rom
then points to himself
ROM
Me?
GARAK
Who else? That's how you ask Leeta
to dance.
ROM
But that's not how it's done.
GARAK
In fairy tales, there is grandeur,
you must bow, and offer your hand,
like so. Keep eye contact with her,
and with your eyes tell her you
want this, that you want her and
say "May I have this dance."
Rom giggles. Garak comes on a bit strong, but it's charming
as anything. Rom gives Garak his hand, and Garak sweeps Rom
into his arms and begins to instruct Rom on how to dance.
Promptly Rom passes out.
Black out.
The magical pinging of tricorder fills the darkness, and as
the blackness fades Rom is looking into the face of a
concerned Dr. Julian Bashir.
GARAK
I didn't poison him.
BASHIR
I'm playing with you Garak.
ROM
Wha..wha..What happened?
BASHIR
You passed out. You're fine, but
take it easy. You are still
recovering.
GARAK
You are very easily swooned.
BASHIR
But who could resist the charms of
our resident tailor.
GARAK
Oh Doctor, you do tempt me.
Bashir gives devilish smile back to Garak, and Rom feels as
though he's intruded on a moment.
ROM
But..But how I am going to learn to
dance if I pass out?
BASHIR
Dancing?
GARAK
Yes, I showed him an old Earth
dance. I must have taken it too
far.
BASHIR
What dance was this?
GARAK
I dare not do it again. If I make
you Dear Doctor pass out we will
have the Constable in here. Then
everyone will truly believe that I
am up to no good. When simply I was
attempting to teach this young man
how to dance to attract a mate.
Rom goes the brightest shade of red. Tricorder sings an even
faster and more intense song.
BASHIR
Stop doing that to him. His blood
pressure is already high enough.
Garak waves off Bashir and goes to work on the garment.
Bashir closes the tricorder to stop the infernal song, and
offers Rom and hand up.
BASHIR
Who are you going to the dance
with?
ROM
It doesn't matter. I'm not going.
Garak yells from the back.
GARAK
Oh yes you are, you can't return
this garment. I won't allow an art
work to hide itself in a closet!
That is a crime!
BASHIR
Don't mind him. Is it Leeta's ball
in the holosuite?
Rom stiffens.
ROM
How did you know?
BASHIR
Word does travel. You should go.
ROM
I don't think so. I'll only make a
mess of things.
BASHIR
I don't think you will.
Bashir pauses for a moment.
BASHIR
And I think Leeta would like to
have you there.
ROM
I can't dance, and I'm... what?
What? But...
BASHIR
I think it would be good for you.
In fact, as your doctor I am
ordering you to go. Medically it is
essential for your health.
I'll prescribe a holosuite dancing
program, that won't make you pass
out.
ROM
Ughhhhh...
BASHIR
Cheer up. It will be good for you.
Garak yelling from the back of the shop.
GARAK
No refunds, or exchanges!
Rom nods, and leaves resigned to his doomed fate. Garak comes
out of the back and stands with Bashir.
BASHIR
What on earth did you do that poor
man?
GARAK
Me? I have been nothing but
gracious and helpful.
BASHIR
Have you?
GARAK
That's big of you. Using your
station to order him to go. You do
realize that you can't do that.
BASHIR
I realize it, but he doesn't.
GARAK
And why do you think Leeta would
want him here?
Bashir says nothing, but smiles with his eyes at Garak.
GARAK
You have gossip I don't? What
aren't you tell me Doctor? Tell me.
BASHIR
My lips are sealed.
GARAK
Over lunch then. I want to know
everything.
BASHIR
A gentleman doesn't tell his
secrets.
Bashir smiles and exits.
GARAK
Oh you are learning my dear doctor.
INT. GARAK'S SHOP - A WEEK LATER
Rom slowly and with much defeat walks into to Garak's shop.
Garak smiles.
GARAK
Don't look so dourer. You haven't
seen your outfit yet. It's an
achievement in art and design.
ROM
I don't think it can turn me into
an actual prince.
GARAK
You have no imagination. And you
are going to be late.
Garak promptly stuffs Rom into an open change room.
GARAK
Get dressed, and come out. I assure
you, you will feel much better once
you are dressed for the part.
Rom sighs. After a moment, knowing Garak will kill him, he
and removes a golden suit from the garment bag. The suit is
pure magic. Embroidered details. Sheer elegance. Enough to
make Rom look at his best.
ROM
This is amazing!
GARAK
Wait until you try it on.
Rom steps out of the change room. He looks like the fairy
tale version of himself. Garak begins to adjust, and
straighten the suit.
GARAK
It's a good fit. You were right to
trust me with this task.
Rom is looking at himself in the mirror
ROM
I can't believe that's me. That's
me. How could I look so good. And I
can move it in it!
GARAK
The right cut, and colour will do
wonders for anyone. It is simply
the magic of a good tailor.
ROM
This isn't good tailoring! This..
This is.. is magic! Like one earth
fairy tail with the grandmother
butterfly that make the dress. You
are my grandmother butterfly!
Garak looks confused but smiles. Rom puts more latinum on the
desk.
ROM
I can't thank you enough.
GARAK
Now have a good time at the ball,
and be back by the stroke of
midnight or your suit will
disappear.
ROM
What? I'll be naked?!?
GARAK
An earth fairy tale joke. Obviously
it won't disappear. It was in poor
taste on my part.
ROM
So I won't suddenly be naked?
GARAK
No.
Rom breathes a sigh of relief.
ROM
Good.
Rom goes back to admiring himself in the mirror. A few
moments pass.
GARAK
Don't you have a ball to get to?
ROM
Hmmm? Oh yes! Right!
Rom dashes out of the tailor's shop, and then runs back
ROM
Thank you!
GARAK
You're welcome.
Rom runs to Quark's bar, and then realizes he'll look foolish
running, and does an awkward half run walk. And straightens
himself out as he reaches the bar.
INT. QUARK'S BAR
Quark looks up from the bar, and gives Rom an approving head
nod. Rom continues up the stairs to the holosuites. Hoping he
isn't the last to arrive.
INT. HOLOSUITE - FAIRY TALE MEDIEVAL EARTH
The door of the holosuite whooshes open to a world of
medieval fancy. The music is loud and joyous. It's a whirl
wind of colours as people twirl and dance. Rom recognizes no
one. As the doors close leaving him in this foreign world he
starts to regret the entire affair. He looks around to see if
he can find Leeta or the other familiar invited guests. Rom
slowly makes his way through the crowd.
ROM
Excuse me. Ah, pardon me.
The sea of dancers seems almost hopeless. Each face blurs
into another human face. Not a single Bajorian face.
ROM
Excuse me
HOLODECK PERSON
Why if it isn't the Count. Aren't
you very well dressed for the
evening.
ROM
Ah thank you, but you are mistaken.
HOLODECK PERSON
I am never mistaken. I believe I
told you never to step foot in the
kingdom again.
ROM
Sorry...I don't think that was me.
HOLODECK PERSON
Who else would have the audacity to
wear gold. You will make the prince
jealous.
ROM
Oh, sorry, I didn't know I wasn't
suppose to wear gold.
HOLODECK PERSON
What good will your apologizes do?
Are you trying to catch the eye of
the mysterious lady in the gorgeous
dress?
ROM
Which one is she?
HOLODECK PERSON
How could you not know?
Rom Shrugs.
HOLODECK PERSON
She comes late the ball every
evening in a brand new gown. How
could you not have noticed?
ROM
They all look the same to me.
HOLODECK PERSON
Have you no taste? Perhaps you are
not the count, and this is a
mistaken identity. Who are you?
Where is your invitation?
ROM
Uh, where is yours?
The holodeck guest is clearly befuddled.
HOLODECK PERSON
That is not what is not what asked.
Who are you?
The crowd grows quiet as a beautiful human woman steps on to
the dance floor with a beautiful dress made of silk looking
very much like moonlight. The entire room is captivated by
her.
ROM
Oh umm, look a princess
HOLODECK PERSON
What?
Rom escapes the insistent guest as they watch the prince ask
the moonlight dressed woman to dance. Rom sighs in relief and
continues his search for Leeta. The ball attendees are
watching the Prince and the Moonlight lady dance, slowly more
dancers join, and the room is flowing again. Rom continues to
make his way across the room, weaving in-between dancers.
Rom stumbles as a dancer flies into him. The dancer grabs him
by the arm to steady him.
LEETA
Oh I'm so sorry!
ROM
It's okay, I was in the way.
LEETA
Rom! I'm glad you made it. That's a
great suit! You really fit the
entire scene.
ROM
Ah, thank you. You look lovely!
LEETA
Thank you. Still getting a hang of
all of this. I'm sorry I hit you.
Did you just arrive?
ROM
I got in a few minutes ago. I
wasn't expecting so many people.
LEETA
It's very intense. But good. Come
with me, I'll get you a drink.
ROM
Ummmm...That would be great!
LEETA
Earth fairy tales are weird, but
this party is fun.
ROM
What is the story?
LEETA
I believe a woman is suppose to
show up wearing a dress made pure
silk that looks like the moon, and
she dances, and then she runs away.
ROM
Oh. Did something happen?
LEETA
I don't know. I think she might be
in love with someone, but can't
tell them. So she wears different
dresses each night and comes to the
ball.
ROM
Wait, I think I saw her.
LEETA
You did?
Rom points behind him.
ROM
I think she's dancing with the
prince.
Leeta looks over Rom's shoulder.
LEETA
Oh that must be her.
ROM
A new dress every night? Might be
easier if she said something.
LEETA
Why does it have to be her?
Shouldn't he say something!
ROM
Well maybe he doesn't know if she
likes him!
LEETA
How could he not know, she shows up
to ball in a new dress every night
and they dance together.
ROM
Maybe she has a lot of dresses.
LEETA
Rom, no one has that many dresses.
ROM
Maybe he's afraid she'll say yes!
LEETA
Yes. Terrifying isn't it?
ROM
It is!
LEETA
What if it everything works out and
everyone is happy in the end.
ROM
Ya....ummm What are we suppose to
do in the story.
LEETA
I choose to be guest. I wanted to
dance, and taste this strange food.
Enjoy the company.
ROM
Oh I should let you find some
better company.
Rom goes to leave, but Leeta grabs his hand.
LEETA
Rom! Stay. Dance with me.
ROM
Okay.
The two of them dance, and frankly it's both beautiful and
awkward. They hit many people and apologize to them. As they
grow accustomed to each their dance transforms into wonderful
spectacle filled with their smiles and laughs. Eventually
it's the two of them on the dance floor, and no one else.
INT. GARAK'S SHOP
Pulling some over time Garak closes up the shop. He puts away
bolts of fabric, and tidies the showroom to be ready for the
morning's work. As Garak locks up the shop giggles can be
heard echoing down the promenade.
As he exits, he sees Leeta walking arm in arm with a smiling
Rom who is carrying her shoes in his free hand. The two of
the giggle and fawn over each other as awkward new couple.
Garak smiles. He has new gossip for Doctor Bashir.
GARAK
My work here is done.
END