Archive of Our Own

Patrick was heaving the second of the boxes into his arms when David appeared at the outside door of the apartment block. He raised an eyebrow.

‘Well that was very masculine a lift.’ he said ‘Clearly someone has been working out.’

‘Get the door David.’ Patrick said between clenched teeth ‘Or I’ll drop it on your foot. Or worse put my back out and not be able to do anything physical.’

Whether it was the thought of having to do the lifting at the Store or something more risque that got David’s attention he diligently opened the door to the stairs, then did the same at the top. Patrick was sweating by the time they got to the third floor. And he cursed, not for the first or last time his agreement to take the ‘Penthouse’ flat in a building with no elevator.

‘I’ve never wanted you more.’ David said with another eyebrow raise as Patrick put the box down and caught his breath in the corridor. Patrick glared at him and he took the hint and took the offered keys and scampered down the hallway to open the door. Patrick sighed and lifted the box for the last few yards, which somehow felt like a mile. He dropped the box as close to the door as possible and exhaled. He was about to offer David some choice words about his ‘help and ‘support’ when he was handed a glass of water by a sheepish looking David. Patrick gave him what he knew David thought of as his ‘you’re a dick but I love you.’ look and leaned over for a kiss.

‘Ew sweaty.’ David couldn’t resist. But leaned over for another kiss to keep himself in Patrick’s good books.

‘It’s what happens when you do physical labour, you should try it sometime.’ Patrick smiled, taking a welcome sip of the water, then downing most of it. It was ridiculously hot today. He pulled at his shirt which felt damp. He unbuttoned his shirt and David’s eyes widened.

‘Manual labour and a striptease? It’s my lucky day.’

Patrick peeled off his shirt, and threw it at David going towards the bedroom to find a clean shirt. Pretending not to notice David’s lingering glance as he went. He decided to forgo a shirt given the heat and pulled on an old t-shirt, a faded blue one from a band he’d long since forgotten seeing. Again when he appeared in the kitchen David’s expression betrayed him as he looked Patrick up and down.

David might have had the decency to look embarrassed but if he couldn’t look approvingly at his own boyfriend in the privacy of his new apartment where could he. And there was something very appealing about this extremely casual version of his boyfriend. His jeans were very old and faded, not his usual smart dark wash fitted denim, and they hung a little around his hips in a scruffy but appealing way. The t-shirt he’d just changed into was again scruffy in a good way, and while it was loose fitting the sleeves were short, displaying more of Patrick’s arms than David usually got to see. Finally he clearly hadn’t shaved in the couple of extra days with the move, and the additional amount of stubble that generated was, it seemed, something David couldn’t take his eyes off either. Patrick saw him staring and tilted his head, probably braced for David telling him the whole ensemble was ‘incorrect’ and while in a strictly fashion sense it was, in other ways it was...very correct. Instead of answering he took a step towards his boyfriend, put a hand to the back of his head and pulled him into a kiss.

The kiss took Patrick off guard in more ways than one. He’d been braced for an onslaught of judgment about his scruffy outfit and unkempt look. Instead David had swept him up in a kiss that equally unsettled him in its force. Until he leaned into it, letting himself be pulled up into David who was busy pulling him towards him with the hand on his head, while also working his free hand under his shirt and around the belt of his jeans. Patrick pulled David in by his hips and felt him lean in, deepening the kiss. After a long few moments pulling at each other David pulled back a bit and Patrick felt his hands come up to his face, then David was kissing his jawline, and his neck before his hands wandered a bit more. Patrick pulled him hungrily into another kiss before they pulled back a bit breathless.

‘What was that for?’ Patrick asked.

David tried not to smile. Tried not to look him up and down. Failed on both counts. Patrick smirked.

‘Oh this.’ he gestured at his outfit ‘Does it for you? Maybe I should come into the Store in casualwear more often.’

David pouted ‘That would be incorrect.’ he said. ‘However.’ he stepped in again ‘This’ he lifted a hand to Patrick’s stubble covered cheek ‘We could see more often.’ he leaned in and kissed just under his jaw again. Patrick pulled back and smiled, also blushing a little bit. Even now he still found himself a little off balance when David really focused his attention on him.

‘Alright.’ he said ‘I thought you were coming to help me, not to...Christen the apartment.’

‘Oh we will very much be doing that later.’ David said, allowing Patrick to shoo him out of the way, but not without standing a bit too close again. Patrick actually batted him away.

‘David you are going to have to behave if we’re getting anything done today.’

David leaned in for a stealthy kiss to Patrick’s neck ‘I still think my way is more fun.’

Patrick shook his head and laughed. ‘But, the longer you delay, the longer you have to put up with my very ‘incorrect’ half moved in mess.’

David folded his arms and pouted ‘A valid point.’ he had already expressed a number of strong opinions over decor, which luckily- or perhaps for an easy life- Patrick had conceded. He felt a weird sense of, not quite pride but something that despite not really moving in they were clearly doing some of this together. ‘Ok what are these?’ he gestured to the boxes, ‘I thought this’ he gestured to the half unpacked apartment ‘Was it already?’

‘My Mom sent them.’ he said ‘Stuff from home. You know when I left I didn't know where I’d be living and for how long so…’ he trailed off with a shrug. His hasty departure and somewhat pin-in-a-map arrival with just a car full of belongings wasn’t something they talked about. But it had become pretty apparent in his moving to the apartment where his things barely filled even the tiny space. Once his Mom-delightedly- heard he was getting his own place, she’d been keen to send him some of the things he’d left at his parents place. And so three giant boxes later here he was. ‘Let’s sort that later’ he said suddenly not quite ready for a burst of nostalgia from home. ‘Besides didn’t you express an interest in correctly storing my clothes?’

David raised an eyebrow. Checking he was still being allowed loose on Patrick’s, well closet was a bit generous, but his boyfriend nodded at him and he grinned in delight.

‘I get final say.’ Patrick called after him as he bounded- there was no other word for it- towards the bedroom where he’d dumped two suitcases full of clothes. He left him to it for a while, looking up now and then when he heard louder muttering. Instead he focused on finishing unpacking the new kitchenware he’d bought. That done he picked his way around boxes and sat on the bed. ‘Ok give it to me.’ he said with a gesture at the piles of clothes on his bed, slightly worried he was going to have no clothes left after this. But looking up he realised David had been busy organising. There was a weird dresser-like thing that had been in Ray’s storage unit he’d ‘gifted’ to Patrick’s apartment, along with some of the other furniture. He’d put it in the bedroom in place of a chest of drawers and Patrick hadn’t really been in a position to object. He also hadn’t- beyond the drawers- figured out how to use it. David of course instantly had. He turned around now with the flourish of a gameshow host.

‘Are you ready?’ he grinned. As unusual as Ray’s choice of furniture was, and as much as it would certainly have never sufficed had he been moving in too, it actually was working practically and aesthetically with Patrick’s clothing collection. And the ability to both organise clothes, and go through Patrick’s wardrobe was bringing him delight on so many levels.

‘Knock yourself out David.’ Patrick grinned. He could see the sheer delight on David’s face and it was making him grin too. Even though he knew he was about to get his fashion sense obliterated.

‘So.’ David began. ‘Here we have all your white undershirts. Arranged by neckline.’

Patrick nodded dutifully ‘Are there going to be weekly inspections?’ he asked.

‘I am just getting started.’ David said an eyebrow raised.

‘I feared as much.’ Patrick nodded at him to continue.

‘Next, sweaters. Arranged by colour. So in your case, variations of blue.’

‘Pot. Kettle. Black.’ Patrick said deadpan, ‘Which in your case is the only colour the kettle could come in.’

David huffed. ‘Arranged by shade. And seasonally. Thin here, thick knits here.’

‘Again I didn’t know you knew sweaters had gradients of seasons. I mean you did wear a leather sweater in August. And danced in it.’

‘Which you appreciated.’

‘Didn’t say I didn’t. You appreciated getting it off after too.’

‘You appreciated taking it off.’ he raised an eyebrow and spun back to the clothes with a flourish.
‘Here’ he gestured, ‘Long sleeved t-shirts, various colours. Including green. You should wear more green.’ he looked Patrick up and down in a way that made him feel like the ‘before’ section of a reality TV show. ‘Your shirts can hang in the closet. They’re mostly fine. Except these.’

He picked up a pile of three flannel shirts, two in blue hues one reddish.

‘What is wrong with flannel?’ Patrick asked, with faux innocence. ‘I mean Stevie certainly rocks it every day…’

‘Exactly.’ David said ‘I cannot risk the two of you being seen in’ he gestured ‘This’

Patrick picked up the red one ‘I mean given Stevie wears it I thought it was a look you were into.’ he held it up against himself. In truth he hadn’t worn them in years, but had thrown them into his suitcase on moving as a ‘just in case’ option, and they’d remained in there ever since.

‘Incorrect.’ David said. Which was obviously enough for Patrick with a smug look to pull on the flannel shirt, which was on seeing it on him, about two sizes too big as well and hung down way past his waist.

‘Gee I don’t know I can feel this making a comeback.’ Patrick mused, ‘Maybe with like a vest underneath?’

‘You would not.’ David looked aghast.

Patrick pretended to admire it. ‘I don’t know it’s got a kind of...vibe.’ he said holding his arms out and grinning.

‘You look like a gay lumberjack.’ David snipped.

‘Another few months here you’d have taken that.’ Patrick countered, adjusting the shirt. ‘Yup might even get a few more.’

David narrowed his eyes. Then sensing he wasn’t going to win this round, swirled around to the dresser again. ‘No in the drawers we have sportswear, which is really not my area, and as long as I’m not expected to wear it I’m letting you keep all your cute little Baseball outfits and hiking ones.’

‘So generous.’ Patrick smiled. ‘You know you could come hiking, even running with me one time... ‘ he laughed out loud at the look of horror on David’s face. He opened the drawer in question.

‘That said I am very much enjoying these.’ he held up Patrick’s swimming trunks, which while not a speedo were very short shorts. He held them up with a triumphant grin. And enjoyed even more watching Patrick blush. ‘Care to explain this choice.’ he said, raising an eyebrow.

‘I have the right to remain silent.’ Patrick said. ‘Though I might wear them with my new favourite shirt…’

David grinned satisfied at the level of embarrassment he’d brought. ‘If we go on a beach vacation we are having a discussion.’ he said turning back to the drawers. ‘Ok this one is socks.’ he gestured, not bothering to open it. ‘This one is underwear.’ He raised an eyebrow and opened it. Patrick folded his arms and waited.

‘An array of perfectly respectable boxer-briefs.’ David nodded satisfied ‘Black is…’he flicked his eyes down.

Patrick smirked. Noted. ‘I have thrown out those.’ he jerked his head to a small pile which even Patrick could see, past their prime. One pair was definitely a shade of bluish grey where they used to be white. He shrugged.

‘Come on David everyone has a collection of mildly questionable old underwear.’

‘I don’t.’ David said.

‘Of course.’

‘Anyway then there are...these.’ David held a pair of boxers between finger and thumb. Patrick smirked.

‘They won’t bite.’

‘I’m not sure.’ David said holding them properly but at arms length. They were admittedly obnoxiously coloured in greens and reds...and had Santa on them. Patrick grinned.

‘They were a gift.’ he said ‘Secret Santa the Christmas before I moved here.’

‘Novelty underwear is best left to Bachelor Parties and Middle School.’ he said with an eyebrow raised so high it might escape to his hairline.

Patrick couldn’t help but grin. ‘David. I’ve got terrible news for you.’ he said putting on a serious face ‘There’s a matching Rudloph pair.’

David’s eyebrow threatened to crack his hairline. He glanced around searching for them.

‘And I’m wearing them.’

David closed his eyes in what looked like genuine anguish. Earlier in their relationship Patrick might have worried that genuinely his lack of style would put David off. He had actually worried about it fleetingly. By now, he was just enjoying the mild torture that mental image was clearly giving his boyfriend.

‘You’re wearing Rudolph underwear. In July.’

‘That is correct.’ He folded his arms ‘They’re very soft and comfortable, feel them.’ David threw the other pair down like they’d bitten him. Patrick laughed. Then with a mischievous look at his boyfriend stood up again and stepped towards him. ‘You won’t even touch them if…’ he grabbed David’s hand and pulled it towards his crotch. David’s face didn’t know what to do, on one hand he loved it when his boyfriend took charge- which his boyfriend well knew- on the other, he was imagining the novelty Christmas underwear. He closed his eyes, both as an attempt to retain control and also as a gesture of exasperation.

‘Only to remove them.’ he said.

Patrick chuckled wickedly and reached up to kiss David’s neck.

‘Isn’t this…’ he was interrupted by an involuntary moan ‘Distracting from the task at hand?’

‘Or is this getting exactly what you wanted?’ Patrick asked with a grin.

‘No idea what you mean.’ David said busying himself with the base of Patrick’s neck again.

‘Right.’ Patrick said, grabbing David by the hips and with a twist and shove throwing him backwards onto the bed.

David’s face managed to look shocked and then very quickly something else as Patrick- always surprisingly stronger than he looked, virtually picked him up and threw him onto the bed. All with a look of smug satisfaction. ‘Oh that’s exactly what I wanted.’ he said with a mischievous glint in his eye. Their relationship had a sort of endless indeterminate competitive edge to it, but David made no secret of the fact that ‘take charge’ Patrick had a certain...appeal.

‘Good because that’s what you’re getting.’ Patrick said smugly before pinning him underneath him expertly. He felt David’s hands at his jeans while he expertly kissed at his neck distracting him. However there was a groan that was not quite of passion as David finally freed his jeans from his hips...and saw the underwear.

David tried to be indignant. But he laughed. And laughed. It was ridiculous. He’d just been pinned down by his boyfriend, who was doing frankly stellar work at taking this to the next level. David had equally expertly worked his jeans free and down his hips only to be greeted with...Rudolph. Whose nose, it had to be said was expertly placed. David couldn’t help it, he giggled. Patrick tried for about two seconds to hold his resolve. And instead collapsed into giggles, and then collapsed onto David laughing.

Patrick had to admit it was ridiculous. He could feel David laughing underneath him which only made him laugh more. It was utterly ridiculous. And he hadn’t ever anticipated anyone else seeing the Rudolph underwear. He managed to lift his head while laughing, and at the same time bumped heads with David who was doing the same. Which only set them off again. He rolled off David and lay next to him while their laughter exhausted itself. Finally he glanced over at David who looked at him with a grin. As he did so his smile morphed into something else- from the mildly hysterical laughter to something fonder.

‘What?’ Patrick asked with his own smile.

David bit his lip and looked down. He hadn’t meant to bring the mood down. He half-smiled shyly as Patrick brought a hand over to his cheek. ‘I guess I was thinking I never had someone to laugh with while...you know.’

Patrick grinned. Then frowned. ‘Me either.’ he said. David smiled at him and he reached over and kissed him. Deepening it again, slower this time, more purposeful.

‘But you have to take those off.’ David muttered into his neck.

‘Well then you’d better help me.’ Patrick said, his voice low just under David’s ear.

‘Gladly.’ he said, doing so in one expert move. He then sat up and threw them clean across the apartment.

‘Nice pitching arm David.’ Patrick grinned.

‘Don’t ruin this with sports.’ David countered, using Patrick’s momentary distraction to return the earlier favour of flipping himself over and pinning Patrick under him. His boyfriend looked up and smirked.

‘Well that’s all well and good but you’re very overdressed.’ Patrick said. David sat up, keeping him there with his legs either side, and letting Patrick reach up and pull his t-shirt off while he worked off his jeans.

‘See those are just boring by comparison’ Patrick said eyeing his sensible black boxer-briefs ‘We’d better just get rid of them too.’ David complied, throwing them in the same direction as Rudolph had gone. Patrick laughed again but was quickly silenced by David’s mouth on his.

A while later both of them lay sweating and exhausted on the bed. Patrick rolled over to grab a bottle of water he’d left on the bedside table and downed some of it, offering it to David, who pulled himself up slowly.

‘Well I would say the bed is well and truly tested.’ Patrick said.

David nodded, taking a gulp of water. ‘It seems sturdy.’ he said with a grin. Patrick grinned back.

‘Well I am disgusting. I need to also test that shower.’

David arched an eyebrow, ‘Care to share that testing?’

‘Insatiable.’ Patrick said with a grin reaching over and kissing him. Before jerking his head as he got up for David to follow him.

Showering, and indeed getting dressed again took far longer than it should. Patrick did think they were going to have to factor in extra time to get ready for the next few weeks if this is what finally having their own space did. David flopped down on the chair in the living room when he was finally dressed and groaned slightly. He ached a bit. In a good way. He might have to figure in some stretching if things were going to remain this physical for a while.

Patrick glanced over at David who was flopped in his chair. His hair was still damp from the shower, and he was back in his t-shirt. He looked a world away from the put-together ‘David Rose’ of everyday life. But he also looked at home there. David looked up and caught him staring, he smiled shyly, embarrassed again. He hadn’t thought moving in here would unleash quite so many emotions, but he reasoned it was something of a big deal. Even without David ‘moving in’ this felt like a step. He finished putting together the sandwich he was making and put the plates and a couple of cans of soda on a tray and carried them over to the living room area. Instead of sitting on the couch, he kicked one of the wooden boxes he’d borrowed from the store over and sat on it, resting the tray on another box.

After a leisurely lunch with some chat about work and moments of silence, Patrick dragged himself to his feet to clear away the plates to the sink and surveyed the room, which was frankly, still a mess.

‘Come on then back at it…’ Patrick surveyed the apartment which right now looked like a bomb had hit it...how when he had so little stuff had it managed to take up so much space?

‘You took the day off yesterday to move in, what exactly did you do?’ David knew instantly from the glare he got he was in trouble.

‘First, you try moving with Ray; it's not exactly a speedy process.’ Patrick rested his hands on his hips. ‘It took two hours just to leave his place.’ he added, trying not to think of the drawn out moving process. ‘Then like a good roommate I cleaned my empty room at his place. By which time it was nearly 1pm. Then I came here and cleaned, because that’s what you do. Also I know someone is very particular and I wanted to be able to say ‘yes David I cleaned the toilet’ and because of course I fucking cleaned the toilet.’ he leaned back against the worktop ‘Then I drove to Elmdale to get the kitchen utensils I didn’t have- which is most things because I was living at Ray’s and came here with one mug. Then I went to the big supermarket because I had no food at all. Ok?’

David looked sheepish. Patrick wasn’t finished.

‘And then I dumped that all in the fridge and went straight to rehearsals because your Mom doesn’t think ‘I was moving house’ is a valid excuse for being even five minutes late. As I found out. To my lasting regret.’

David made a knowing face of sympathy. ‘Did she make you demonstrate choreography to the room?’

Patrick glared. ‘Twice.’ he folded his arms. ‘And lead the stupid warm up game.’ he was pouting now he knew. He missed David’s amused my sympathetic grin as he crossed the room and wrapped himself around Patrick who remained arms folded sulking.

‘Sorry.’ David said. ‘Though I do wish I’d seen that choreography demonstration.’

Patrick made a slight warning sound and David squeezed him kissing his cheek ‘Sorry.’ he said ‘Remember aside from privately shipping all my belongings to New York my only experience of moving is fifteen minutes to throw whatever belongings I could carry into a box.’ he’d meant it to be light hearted by Patrick caught something in his tone and snapped out of his sulk. He twisted in David’s arms and looked up.

‘Guess we have that in common. A hasty retreat from an old life.’ he rested his hands on David’s hips, it was easy to forget sometimes- particularly when he was being very ‘David’ that he’d lost everything so recently.

David frowned, he’s never thought of it like that before. ‘I guess so.’ he said slowly, looking down, he still found himself on the defensive about it, waiting to be made fun of for it. ‘You really just up and left home?’ he’d never pushed Patrick on it, he knew bits of the story now- his break up with Rachel, moving in with his parents for a bit.

‘Sort of.’ Patrick said, his turn to look down. He owed David that conversation, by now it was time to explain more of it, but telling his life story didn’t exactly come naturally. He looked up again. ‘How about we unpack those boxes my Mom sent before we order dinner?’

‘Pizza?’ David asked, sensing the distraction was needed.

‘If you behave.’ Patrick grinned. ‘And don’t throw any more of my clothes out.’

David thought for a second, genuinely he seemed to be weighing up the value of Pizza versus having authority over his boyfriend’s fashion choices. ‘I am making no promises.’ he said eventually, but kissed his boyfriend and awaited instructions.

They passed a few hours in companionable silence, peppered with occasional questions about where to put things and observations about the layout of the space, and then with some music softly playing once Patrick set up the sound system. David resumed the wardrobe sorting, along with remaking the bed and setting up the bedroom. He was about to start on the bedside tables when he awkwardly realised he’d have to make a decision about which ‘side’ was Patrick’s.

‘Umm…’ he said hovering awkwardly at the foot of the bed.

‘What’s up?’ Patrick said from the kitchen where he was giving the cupboards a deep clean.

‘Um the bed. Well the bedside tables. I don’t know where you...want stuff.’

Patrick shrugged from his stance on a small step-stool. ‘Whatever, you do your design thing, we'll move it if it doesn’t work.’

David shifted from foot to foot. ‘No, um I mean where you want stuff like your stuff or…’

Patrick broke into a grin. ‘Which side of the bed do you want David?’ he asked, folding his arms and leaning on the cupboard.

David rolled his eyes, then jerked his head. ‘This side.’ he said.

Patrick grinned. ‘Well then, put my stuff on the other side then.’ He turned back to the cupboard, determined not to make a big deal out of it, but he caught David’s coy pleased smile and he nodded to himself.

David busied himself with the bedside table set up, not that there was much to do, and he left the drawer for Patrick to fill with whatever personal affects he wanted, but he did first go to the bathroom and retrieve some tissues for it, and put in a lip balm he’d brought from the Store, and a hand cream. He finished tidying the bedroom, storing some backpacks and Patrick’s baseball glove and bat under the bed in a box. He then quietly got to work on Patrick’s desk. He knew he liked a clear workspace so there wasn’t much to do, but he arranged the lamp and a plant, and a new notebook from the Store on there alongside the laptop. He didn’t notice Patrick creeping up behind him until his arms were around him.

‘Could do with a picture.’ he said into David’s back.

‘Well the whole place needs some art.’ David gestured at the currently blank walls.

‘Hmm I was thinking more, that's a good place for a picture of me and my boyfriend.’ Patrick said, ‘As well as on the mantelpiece.’ David didn’t answer, and Patrick worried he’d got it wrong, maybe David didn’t go in for that kind of sentimental public display. ‘I mean I don’t have to, I just thought it would be a nice-’ he was cut off by David detangling himself and kissing him fiercely.

He didn’t have word for it. Other than his parents house- unfortunately in sometime giant format- he’d never had his picture in anyone’s house before. So he tried to communicate that in a fierce kiss. ‘Just you know make sure it’s a good one.’ he said, pulling back.

‘Noted.’ Patrick said, but he gave a barely perceptible squeeze to David’s hip signalling that he knew. David nodded at him in return. ‘And hey I think we’re done!’ he said triumphantly. He looked around, it wasn't finished, given he had relatively little furnishings and next to no decorative items. But it was getting there, and he felt instantly settled and home here.

‘It’s good.’ David said ‘Though you still have your Mom’s boxes to unpack.’

Patrick hadn’t forgotten, in truth he was avoiding them a bit, unsure how he felt about boxed up bits of his past arriving in his new life. But he could see he wasn’t going to get away with it so he nodded. ‘Drink?’ he suggested and David nodded. And so while David retrieved wine from the fridge, he hauled the boxes to the bedroom and perched on the end of the bed to unpack.

There were three large boxes, all unlabelled so it was going to be a magical mystery tour of what his Mom packed in which. Patrick used the scissors to open the first, and guessed immediately this was his Mom being ‘helpful’ mainly because on top there were a set of kitchen utensils.

‘Well that might have saved you a trip to Elmdale.’ David said peering in. ‘Excellent housewarming gift, a spatula.’

Patrick pulled it out and waved it around ‘Careful or I’ll spank you with it.’

David raised an eyebrow that said clearly ‘go on then.’

‘Ew David not an actual kitchen utensil, have some standards.’ but he still playfully hit his shoulder with it.

‘I’ve been spanked with worse.’ he said, and watched Patrick blink trying to figure out what. ‘So sweet.’ David said leaning over kissing him ‘So innocent.’ he loved to slightly terroise his boyfriend with hints at ridiculous sex acts, most of them not nearly as fun as he hinted, but it was fun to watch Patrick’s brain try and compute what went where. ‘If you’re good I’ll show you how best to use that.’

Patrick rewarded him by swatting him with the spatula on the arm again. He unpacked the top layer of the box, which consisted of some kitchen utensils, some tea towels, bathroom towels and, weirdly, a mattress cover.

‘What does your Mom think you need that for?’ David asked, raising an eyebrow.

‘Really? You’re making all my Mom’s housewarming gifts dirty?’ Patrick said.

‘Hey I just asked a question…’ David shrugged putting it to one side ‘Though I commend you on spending the extra money on the deluxe mattress, it really has that extra spring.’ he raised an eyebrow and smirked.

‘You really are insatiable today.’ Patrick grinned and was rewarded by David swiftly and fiercely pulling him into a kiss that all but took the air from his lungs. David said nothing but returned to rooting around the box. His Mom had clearly decided that even at 30 he couldn’t be trusted to furnish an apartment, because she’d included toothpaste and toothbrushes, some pillowcases, four washcloths…

‘Well we do use them often.’ David said his mind clearly still on other things, and Patrick swatted him with them and shooed him to the bathroom with them, the toothpaste, toothbrushes and a toothbrush holder that admittedly he didn’t have. The bottom of the box was taken up with a folded quilted blanket and an envelope resting on it. He opened the envelope while David was in the bathroom, probably re-arranging his toiletries. He opened the envelope and found two gift cards and a note ‘Make sure you buy some nice things and make it home Mom and Dad x’ he smiled and put them to one side, before unfolding the patchwork quilt blanket.

‘Ooh that’s nice.’ David said approvingly reappearing. The quilt was impeccably made he could see it from here, but his boyfriend was frowning at it ‘What?’ he asked then got distracted ‘Ooh gift cards!’ he read the note and frowned himself, Patrick’s parents really were the sweetest, it was silly really but he felt almost jealous at their level of concern, and at their silly housewarming gifts. His parents had been happy to hand over security deposits and pay for movers, but they’d never bought him a housewarming gift. Hell some places he’d lived they’d never even seen- sometimes for the best- but his Mom certainly wouldn’t send him a spatula and tea towels. Even the gift cards- one for Target one for Hudson’s Bay showed a level of caring- he knew one was for ‘basics’ for the house, the other was for ‘nice things’ they were for $100 each, which wouldn’t have covered cushions in David’s old life, but he knew that was a lot of money to the Brewers, hell it was a lot of money to him and Patrick and even if they weren’t here they were helping him move. It was really sweet, and he had to tell himself not to get emotional, mainly because it looked like something had set Patrick off.

‘Hey?’ David asked, reaching over to the blanket touching the delicate stitching. ‘This is really nice.’

‘My Grandma made it.’ Patrick smiled, with a little sadness ‘My Mom had it on her bed for a while, and then I guess she put it away in storage.’ he folded the quilt down and smiled at David ‘Nana died about four years ago I guess?’

David tilted his head and smiled at his boyfriend, who talked about his family all the time but still kept so much of it back. He ran a hand over the quilt, ‘It’s lovely’ he said and Patrick smiled at him.

Somewhere between the stuff he felt guilty about keeping from David, and his naturally guarded nature, he’d forgotten to share some important stuff. ‘Mum misses her a lot I think.’ he said from nowhere ‘and then I left and…’ he shrugged ‘Only child, a lot of guilt sometimes.’ it came from nowhere, a really honest truth, that the guilt he felt was two sided, and complicated. He’d upped and left his parents when he was all they had, and now he’d not visited for so long, and it had been too long for many things.

‘You’ll have to have them come visit.’ David said, ‘When it’s totally finished, I know there’s nowhere for them to stay here but maybe they could stay at the Motel or you could stay with me or….’sorry.’ he realised he’d got carried away ‘I mean why would they want to visit here? It's a stpuid idea.’

Patrick had frozen momentarily at the thought of his parents visiting, a familiar guilt pulling at him soon after, but he realised quickly his expression had contributed to David's anxious rambling, he was now fidgeting with his rings slightly. Patrick reached over a hand to his knee.

‘That’s a lovely idea.’ he said, ‘Uh you know one day when it’s all settled here or whatever.’ that seemed to placate David who nodded, folding up the blanket. Or so he thought.

‘I like them.’ he said softly, ‘Your parents.’ he added sort of redundantly, then rolled his eyes at himself ‘I guess I’m just saying I’d like to meet them, you know, whenever.’ he swallowed and looked down. He’d never intentionally met anyone’s parents before, never wanted to. But Mr and Mrs Brewer seemed lovely every time he spoke to them, and something in him desperately wanted to make a good impression. Patrick didn’t say anything for a long moment, and he worried he’d got it really wrong, but Patrick reached over and covered his hand with his own for a moment.

‘That would be nice.’ he said quietly, he didn’t really have anything else he could say. It would be nice, at this point it was all he wanted, to introduce his parents to David, properly, to have them know how important he was, how much he’d changed his life. But he couldn’t tell David any of that.

‘Right next box!’ David declared triumphantly. ‘Oof what’s in it your rock collection?’

Patrick ripped open the lid, it turned out to be mostly records and books. Not nearly all but his Mom had left another note ‘I think these were your favourites but send for any more you want.’ He smiled, that his Mom could still remember his favourites years later. She hadn’t sent many of each- shipping would be a fortune as it was- but having a handful of his favourite records and books was nice. He sifted through the vinyl, mostly a collection of classic rock with a bit of folk stuff. He laughed as he unearthed the bottom three- a snapshot of his family’s musical theatre collection, The Sound of Music, West Side Story and Sweeney Todd.

‘Patrick Brewer have you always been a little bit musical theatre?’ David asked, seemingly delighted by this revelation.

‘I was in the drama club.’ he said with a grin, ‘And I was a guy who was there and could hold a tune so…’

David’s eyebrows shot up. ‘Did you dance?’ he asked.

‘Only when forced to.’ Patrick said very seriously.

‘Well that is fair, you do have legs like tree trunks.’ David said. He picked up ‘The Sound of Music’ ‘So were you like Ralph with a really bad home dye job? Or a VonTrapp child?’

Patrick grinned. ‘Oh no, I was the Captain.’ he said ‘Senior Year of college.’

David’s eyebrow shot up approvingly. ‘Well that must have been something, especially the uniform.’

‘Really David? Captain Von Trapp?’ Patrick smirked.

‘Hey, every self-respecting person attracted to men or with Daddy issues is attracted to Captain Von Trapp.’

‘If you say so David.’ Patrick teased ‘I should be thankful Cats doesn’t do it for you.’ he shifted the records to one side, and sifted the books. His Mom had sent a few of his business textbooks that would come in handy, a few baseball books too she knew he was fond of which was nice. And yes she was right, a few of his well worn novels, which he might not read again but were nice to have. Some classics he read in High School and College he liked to have around. David sifted through the pile.

‘Brideshead Revisited?’ he said again with the eyebrow.

‘Yeah I think I read it in college?’ Patrick said half distracted by his baseball book ‘I loved it though, read it like three times.’

David smirked, flicking through the well thumbed pages.

‘What?’ Patrick said, ‘It was on one of my lit courses, but I really liked it, don’t tell me it’s somehow ‘incorrect’ David it’s a classic.’

‘It’s a gay classic.’ David grinned and grinned wider as Patrick frowned and then his eyes widened in recognition. ‘Maybe give it a re-read’ he said leaning over and kissing his cheek.

Patrick set it down on the pile, and thought about it for a second, and it sort of all fell into place. He blushed slightly, thankful David didn’t seem to want to pursue it. He turned his attention back to the box, which at the bottom had a familiar looking notebook.

Patrick pulled it out and ran his hand over it. The soft leather bound A4 notebook, with pages spilling out of it. He opened it and flicked through, pages and pages of his scrawl. He picked up the file that went with it, and flicked through some sheet music. The small but dedicated record of his songwriting. Some of it is ridiculous no doubt. Some of it the only place he’d put all of the things he didn’t have anywhere else to put. He felt David’s eyes on him. He was expecting to be greeted by some kind of quip. Instead David was looking at him with an unreadable expression.

‘Just stupid stuff I used to do…’ he shrugged.

David shook his head. ‘You wrote? songs?’ he guessed. He could see Patrick was shy about it, and he didn’t want to pry. Patrick nodded, flicking through the notebook fondly.

‘Just a place to put my thoughts I guess.’ he shrugged, he looked over and David was smiling at him. ‘What?’ he said, finding it impossible to read David. Who leaned over and kissed him.

‘I love you.’ he said with a smile. He couldn’t explain why it made him so emotional to find his boyfriend had this creative side, this thing that was his. Patrick was frowning at him. ‘I just think...it’s lovely.’ he shrugged. And looked away embarrassed.

‘It’s silly I mean it’s not like I’m going to do anything with them.’ he continued to flick through, memories leaping out as he did so. He paused on one, remembering a particularly bleak time he wrote it in. He felt David’s hand on his neck.

‘I still draw. It helps me...put my thoughts places too.’ David smiled at him ‘Keep doing it. Play them for me one day.’ he leaned over and kissed his boyfriend’s head. Patrick smiled again.

‘Maybe.’ he said. ‘It’s also...a reminder of...things.’

‘Maybe.’ David said scooting closer and wrapping his arms around Patrick’s shoulders, ‘you need that to.’ he rested his head on top of Patrick’s ‘Remind you how far you’ve come.’

Patrick hummed in agreement then leaned up to kiss David. ‘I think you might be right.’ he said giving it another flick through and closing it. It was nice to have a reminder of who he was, even if they weren’t all the best memories. Speaking of, he suspected the last box, the smaller of the three might contain some of those. He pulled it closer and opened it. He could feel David’s eyes on him as he sifted through. The top layer was a mix of documents he needed that he hadn’t remembered to bring the first time around- his College and High School diplomas on top, he put to one side, along with his transcripts. David of course picked them up.

‘Patrick William Brewer’ he said with a smile, David was weirdly fond of Patrick’s middle name, it was very solid, reliable and traditional much like him. ‘You were quite the nerd weren’t you?’

Patrick shrugged, he’d always been naturally academic, and even in the subjects he wasn’t he’d worked hard. His parents had instilled that in him, along with the need as an only child not to let them down. He felt a familiar pang at that too. ‘Some of us didn’t have looks and style to skate by on.’ he winked.

David smirked, but underneath he registered that Patrick didn’t go for his wealth, or family connections in his tease. He knew David better than that, knew that would hurt. He could take a tease on looking pretty and styling his way through things- it was true to an extent after all. He couldn’t deny also that money and connections got him places too, but Patrick never mocked him for that- only for the slightly ridiculous elements that the world had given him.

‘And where would we be without my style.’ he countered waving an arm at the half finished apartment.

‘Or my nerd brain getting us there.’ Patrick added.

‘We are very grateful to Mr Business School.’ David said seriously. Patrick smiled and went back to sifting through documents, noting which ones he needed for various things. David was clearly thinking to his left though because he pulled up his knees to his chest and watched him for a bit, Patrick could feel his eyes on him, and eventually he looked over. ‘Did you always want to …’ he trailed off with a shrug.

‘Run a General Store in a small town with my boyfriend?’ Patrick smiled ‘I think it's safe to say that didn’t exactly feature in my career counseling sessions in High School.’ he chuckled, but then caught David’s expression, so he stopped and put the papers down, giving him his full attention. ‘I didn’t know what I wanted to do.’ he said honestly, ‘I did the right thing, went to school, did internships, got a Graduate position...and when they laid me off because of cutbacks I didn't’ really know what to do next.’ he’d always followed a plan, school, job relationship, it had always been in order exactly what everyone, parents, teachers, friends thought he should do. He paused, ‘That was the first time I’d really stopped and thought about what I wanted.’

‘And?’ David asked.

‘I still didn’t know.’ he smiled ‘But I guess I sort of always thought it would be fun to be my own boss- or shared boss.’ he said with a grin. He smiled wider ‘And tell him this and I’ll have to kill you, but Ray sort of inspired me when I moved here.’

‘Have you been drinking?’ David asked.

‘Seriously David, I know his ideas are a little...out there...but the man manages to run like five businesses in a small town, and he does ok at it. I’m not saying I wanted to run the next photography real estate business like him, but a fancy Store in this town was also pretty out there…’ he trailed off with a shrug ‘Sometimes you don’t know what you want until you get it.’ he said.

David considered for a moment, and nodded with a lopsided grin. ‘I guess we both found that out.’ he said. Then he leaped up, moving across the room to his bag. He was going to save this for later, but this seemed the moment. He felt Patrick’s eyes on him as he crossed the room with a perfectly wrapped- in black and white- gift.

‘What’s this?’ Patrick frowned.

‘Housewarming gift.’ he beamed sitting down again, biting his lip anxiously. ‘Given we were talking about the Store this seemed the moment so…’ he gestured and Patrick took the hint and opened it. He saw the moment he registered what it was and his eyes widened, and a slow smile spread across his face. ‘You don’t have to put it up or anything but…’

Patrick discarded the wrapping and held up the frame, it was a poster from the first Open Mic night they’d held. ‘Well this is too good a frame to waste.’ he grinned, and felt David exhale next to him. Sentimental gifts were more Patrick’s department but David had got this one right. Patrick ran a hand over the frame. ‘And hey, maybe one day we can hang it next to the first receipt and they’ll make a good pair.’

‘They do make a nice pair.’ David grinned. ‘The frames don’t match but they compliment each other.’

‘Uh huh, is that so?’ Patrick asked.

‘I’d say so.’ David grinned, Patrick locked eyes with him for a moment and nodded, placing the frame carefully to one side.

‘Talking of frames…’ Patrick trailed off digging in the box. ‘Think my parents are hinting at something?’ He pulled out a framed pair of pictures, one of just his parents, and another of his graduation. David laughed and took the graduation one from him.

‘Look at you in your little cap and gown.’ he grinned at 22 year old Patrick drowned by the giant gown, ‘And that hair we need to have a conversation about product for curly hair.’

Patrick pulled the picture back. ‘It was a while ago, products have come on since then, as has my understanding of them thanks to someone. So if-IF- I ever grow it again I’ll be better informed.’ the ‘what do you look like with longer hair’ conversation was well worn by now, and luckily Patrick had spotted a photo album in the box, so he sighed and handed it over.

‘Oh this will be fun.’ David beamed, but with a little look at Patrick said ‘But we’ll look later.’

‘There’s another one.’ Patrick said ‘I think that one’s mostly college, the other one is a bit of everything.’ he’d had them in his room forever, and he guessed his Mom reasoned he wanted to have them with him. He paused and looked at the picture of him and his parents, he really did miss them.

‘You look like your Dad.’ David said softly a fond smile on his face when Patrick looked over at him.

‘You can talk.’ Patrick said with a grin, David grinned back. ‘I’m probably a lot like him actually.’ he said with a nodd, ‘At least everyone always said so.’ he shrugged. ‘Maybe not anymore I don’t know.’ He couldn't explain it to David, but his biggest fear was the idea his family, everyone at home, would start seeing him differently, he’d no longer be ‘Clint’s boy who is just like him.’ he’d be...something else.

‘Well there’s nothing wrong with growing into your own person.’ David said taking the frame off him and looking again ‘And from what I’ve learned about your Dad, he is a polite, hardworking, funny and nice person.’ he smiled ‘So I’d say you’re a lot like him still.’

Patrick smiled ‘You think my Dad’s funny?’ he said with a grin.

‘Sure.’ David said ‘he pretends all the time not to know what the Body Milk is for, or even lip balm.’

‘Um David.’ Patrick started ‘Never mind.’ he added and busied himself with the box again. There were a few more loose photographs that he added to the pile, and some more documents. His Mom had also thrown in a couple of his winter scarves and hats, clearly mindful he stayed warm despite the current temperature. He sifted through and then spotted something at the bottom.

‘Oh wow.’ he muttered, then gave a slightly unsure glance at David. This could go any direction, and he felt himself blushing. ‘Um.’ he said and picked up the last thing in the box.

It was a very battered, very old Teddy Bear. A pale brown with slightly mottled fur and a green and red bow inexplicably still holding on by a thread to his neck, it’s paws had matching red and green patches on them. David’s face lit up in delight.

‘Who is this?!’ he exclaimed with a grin.

‘This would be Terry .’ Patrick said, rising to the challenge and refusing to be embarrassed.

‘Well hello Terry.’ David said.

‘Is that any way to greet the bear?’ Patrick challenged, holding out it’s paw to David. Who to his credit reached over and ‘shook’ it. ‘Better.’ Patrick said, ‘He says nice to meet you David. And that you have nice hair.’

‘Bertie is a bear of impeccable taste.’ David said. ‘Yours I assume…’ he trailed off, but held out his hands, and Patrick obliged. David sat the bear in his lap and poked at its belly and ran a hand fondly over it. It was softer than it looked, and the colouring almost matched Patrick’s own hair, a soft brown with flecks of something else in it. He felt strangely drawn to the raggedy old thing and smiled at it, and glanced over at Patrick. ‘Why Terry?’ he asked.

Patrick grinned. ‘Terry the Teddy?’ he said, ‘But also my Nana named him.’ David looked confused. ‘Nana was my Irish Nana, and in Nana’s eyes Terry Wogan was the most handsome man to ever live.’

‘Who?’ David asked. Patrick laughed.

‘He was a radio presenter in England. But he was Irish. Born in Limerick, not far from Nana’s family actually and well if you believe her their best friends.’ he smiled fondly, ‘He hosted the Eurovision Song Contest for years, which is the highlight of both the British and Gay social calenders so I’m led to belive.’ Patrick gave David a challenging look.

‘I had a thing with a Sweedish guy who was very into it.’ he confirmed. ‘Terry then.’ he mused.

Patrick shrugged. ‘Dad got it for me, one Christmas-I think he got it free with something else, but I loved it and it went everywhere- even I might add back to Ireland when we went to visit family when I was ten.’ David handed it back to him and he ran a hand over it. ‘Silly, still attached to a toy.’ he shrugged, but he ran the soft ears between his fingers, and lifted it up and gave it a sniff, his Mom had clearly given it a wash as it smelled like home. He closed his eyes for a second and pulled it to his chest. ‘Silly.’ he muttered and went to put the bear back in the box but he felt David’s hand on his arm, and he shook his head and held out his hands again.

‘Terry.’ he said to the bear ‘This is your new house.’ he held the bear up and showed it the room. ‘I’m sorry to say I might have taken your spot in the bed, but we’ll find you somewhere.’

Patrick laughed, impossibly touched by the ridiculousness of the gesture, more so when David pulled it back towards his lap and petted it a bit. ‘David?’ he said gently.

‘I don’t have anything from my childhood anymore.’ he shrugged. ‘So it's nice you do.’

It hit Patrick like a cold wave. He felt really insensitive suddenly, David had nothing, nothing at all from his childhood, it was all gone. He’d lost everything except his clothes in one day and Patrick had been here flaunting his boxes of memories. ‘David I’m sorry.’ he said quietly. ‘I shouldn't have...I mean it wasn’t fair of me to sit here with all this.’

David gave him a lopsided smile, ‘No it was really nice.’ he said. ‘Look there’s not much I’d choose to remember from before. Not really. I know I didn’t have a miserable life, I know how privileged we were, but there’s not a lot I needed to hang onto. It’s just...strange sometimes to remember it’s all gone.’

Patrick wrapped his arms around David’s neck and pulled him into a sideways hug. ‘Well you can share my Teddy Bear.’ he said with a grin. ‘And I give you fifteen minutes of mocking my hair and clothes in those photo albums.’

David detangled himself and kissed Patrick’s cheek. ‘Then what are we waiting for?!’ he exclaimed, jumping up grabbing the albums. Patrick shook his head, and quietly tidied up the slight mess while they waited for the pizza he ordered to arrive and David immersed himself in the photographs. By the time he joined him the time for mocking had passed and over dinner David interrogated him about the holidays and family members in each photo, even asking passing questions about the sports team photos, but pausing more to enjoy the drama club ones.

‘Well that was a fun ride through Brewer Family History.’ David said triumphant at the end. Patrick laughed at him but truthfully he felt like he learned a lot about his boyfriend tonight. ‘Really.’ he said softly, ‘I liked seeing them.’

Patrick nodded. He liked showing them to David too, it felt like he was slowly peeling back the layers of what was his ‘before’ life and what was ‘now’ and it felt nice. He nodded, and started a silent debate in his head he’d been having all night. For a moment he decided to distract things again.

‘Drink?’ he asked, David nodded.

The music played softly on the record player while Patrick gathered up wine and some chips, not having a coffee table yet he used one of the boxes as a makeshift stand. David poured while Patrick perched himself on the end of the sofa, he caught himself fidgeting a bit, and David looked over questioningly.

‘Actually I have something for you.’ Patrick smiled that shy smile that meant he wasn’t quite sure how this was going to go. David frowned, and took the small Rose Apothecary pouch Patrick was holding out. He opened it to find a small blue glass keychain-one that they sold in fact- and a key attached. Patrick smiled a bit more fully, ‘Your didn’t think I wasn’t going to give you a key?’ he said, somewhat uncertainly.

‘Well I um… fuck.’ David looked up trying not to cry, and felt Patrick’s hand on his knee. ‘I mean…’ he huffed ‘Nobody ever gave me a key to their place before. I mean Robert Downey Jnr did but that was more a pet sitting situation when I was fifteen and I killed his fish so…’

‘David.’ Patrick said bringing him back to focus, and away from a fish-murder story. ‘I want you to use that key whenever you like ok? Not just for emergencies or whatever, you are welcome here any time, and even if I’m not here for whatever reason and you want some time away from the Motel or your family…’ he shrugged. ‘Whenever you like ok?’

David couldn’t hide the fact he was crying now, they might not have moved in- because Patrick as ever was right, he wasn’t ready, but this was as good as. Better even, he smiled at his boyfriend. ‘Thank you.’ he said softly, leaning over to kiss him. He couldn’t quite wrap his head around having a real boyfriend with a real apartment he was unofficially sharing.

‘I’ll even clear out some closet space for you.’ Patrick grinned.

‘You fucking better.’ David grinned and kissed him again, he wiped at his eyes and Patrick reached up an arm and let him flop under it, they stayed sipping the wine and chatting easily until neither of them could hide their yawns and dragged themselves up to get ready for bed.

David was sitting in bed already, reading his book-no Patrick realised, reading Brideshead Revisited- but he grinned as Patrick walked over to the bed, no not grinned, smirked Patrick realised. Immediately he wondered what his boyfriend was up to.

‘David? You ok?’ he asked.

‘Fine.’ David grinned, flipping a page.

Patrick reached the bed and pulled off his socks, balling them up and leaving them on the floor. He pulled back the blankets on his side...to be greeted by Bertie the bear.

‘Oh hi there Terry.’ Patrick grinned ‘Guess you’ll be the one I snuggle up to tonight then.’ He hopped into bed and dutifully pulled the bear to him. David looked outraged. ‘Sorry David, I’ve only got one set of arms and this guy was here long before you.’

David huffed. And turned back to his book, Patrick grinned and let him stew for a second, then slowly, very slowly, he used the bear’s paw to reach over and poke his boyfriend’s arm. David refused to look. So he poked again. And again. David looked at him sideways and he made the bear wave.

‘Don’t be mad David, he still loves you.’ he said in a squeaky ‘bear voice’ David glared, then laughed. Patrick lifted an arm up and David scooted under, and he rested the bear between them.

‘I’m glad he can share you.’ David said and laughed again as Patrick poked him with the bear’s arm.

‘Don’t worry he won’t be moving into our bed.’ Patrick covered its ears ‘But after travelling all that way in a box we owe him.’ he was being silly, but it also felt nice to be able to be silly about the bear. They were laughing about it, but also David hadn’t laughed at him, for his Mom sending his childhood teddy bear. For him wanting it- not to sleep with every night, but just to have. That he had a sentimental side maybe wasn’t a surprise to David, he was after all the one of them to send anniversary gifts, or keep receipts from the Store and frame them in the hope it would mean something. But a small part of him had worried, somehow that part of him should stay hidden.

‘Thank you.’ Patrick said quieter than he intended ‘For today. For helping and whatever.’

‘Well someone has to make sure this place looks acceptable.’ David smirked up at him. He understood the other implication of Patrick’s thank you though, ‘You’re welcome.’ he said and snuggled in a bit deeper to his boyfriend, sensing he needed it. He sighed involuntarily as he did so.

Patrick felt his boyfriend relax into him as he snuggled a bit deeper. ‘It’s nice isn’t it?’ he said, ‘The quiet, the...space.’

‘The lack of fear Ray will catch you with your pants down.’ David muttered and felt Patrick laugh.

‘Or worse.’ Patrick added. He’d be inclined to feel sorry for all that Ray had seen and heard but the man really didn’t understand knocking. He suddenly felt an uneasy pang of something ‘Hey should we be...you know celebrating Ray isn’t going to walk in?’ he was suddenly aware it was their first night really alone and they were actually cuddling up with a teddy bear.

‘Oh I think we gave the bed a good test run.’ David muttered into his chest. Patrick hummed a response and David sat up a bit, and fixed him with a serious expression. ‘There’s no ‘have to’ remember?’ he said with a raised eyebrow. It was a conversation they’d had a few times, Patrick had trouble letting go of old habits around sex, the feeling of obligation he’d felt for so long was hard to shake. He nodded, and felt David shift in a bit and kiss his neck. ‘Do you know most couples don’t have sex on their wedding night?’ he said with a smile ‘Too drunk, too tired, the Bride’s feet hurt…’

Patrick kissed him, ‘Well my back does hurt from lugging those boxes.’ he smiled. ‘Thanks.’ he added looking down. It still took some adjusting, and he had to remind himself that as easy as it had all been he was still undoing many years of the ‘not right’ in that department, and David was endlessly patient and wise in matters of sex.

‘We will more than make up for it.’ David promised, working a hand under Patrick’s shirt, and planting a kiss on his chest. ‘I promise’ he half yawned ‘Besides I don’t think I have the stamina anymore.’

‘Surely not.’ Patrick joked. ‘Sleep?’ he suggested and David nodded into him. They did in fact spend a good few minutes more trading soft kisses in the dark, before they drifted off to sleep David still snuggled into Patrick’s side.

David woke to an unfamiliar room at about 4am. It took him long moments to remember he was in Patrick’s new place and he relaxed on realising and sensing his boyfriend’s weight in the bed near him. He sat up and took a drink of water, it was quiet and peaceful here, and the light was just about creeping in at this time of day, it felt really right, even at 4am. He glanced over at his boyfriend, who had rolled over onto his side. David did a double take and realised he had Terry the bear tucked under his chin- he actually had his arms wrapped tightly around it, the bear’s arms resting over his, the head tucked just under his chin. There was something really touching about the image, his usually no-nonsense, strong and protective boyfriend curled around his childhood teddy bear. Somewhere in it too, David wondered how many people got to see this Patrick, the one who wrote songs in his bedroom, kept his Nana’s quilt on his bed, missed his family more than he let on, and sometimes wanted a moment with his childhood teddy. He was glad he’d got to see it today. He knew he wasn’t good at sharing those things too, but he knew he was getting better. He lay back down, and curled up into Patrick, wrapping an arm around him, and instinctively grabbing a stray ‘paw’ from the bear too. He felt Patrick stir and mumble something but he didn’t wake up.

Patrick woke up slightly disoriented, the wall wasn’t the usual wall he looked at, and it took him a second to remember where he was. But he registered David’s arm wrapped around him, and felt the comforting weight of him wrapped around him. And he remembered, he had his own place now. And it was quiet, and calm and all theirs to enjoy. He blinked his eyes open and saw it was 8.30 already, clearly the moving had worn him out. He felt David stir against him with a soft groan.

‘Morning.’ Patrick murmured, earning a grunt in return. David rolled away slightly, allowing Patrick to roll over into him, and to wake him up in a manner that he’d learned was acceptable- by kissing him.

‘Good morning.’ David managed as his boyfriend rolled on top of him.

‘Morning.’ Patrick said, kissing down his neck.

‘What’s this?’ David murmured, kissing him back.

‘Further testing of this new bed.’ Patrick said, pushing a hand under his boyfriend’s soft t-shirt. ‘Unless you object of course?’ he paused. David shook his head.

‘No I think extensive testing is most necessary, at all hours of the day.’ he ran his hand up Patrick’s back and lifted his shirt up and off in a smooth movement.

‘Exactly my thinking.’ Patrick grinned, leaning down for another kiss.

Some time later, David finished clattering about in the bathroom while Patrick busied himself with breakfast. Patrick poked at the eggs in the pan as David swept in and wrapped his arms around his neck.

‘David, cooking here, hot things.’ he protested without much conviction, before leaning back into David’s embrace. He smelled of Patrick’s mint shower gel and it seemed he’d even lowered himself to use his generic shampoo as well so he smelled like a mix of mint and florals.

‘There’s something hot in the kitchen’ David murmured.

‘Oh you didn’t.’

‘You’re right, I’m ashamed please don’t ever speak of that again.’

‘David I thought you had a reputation for dating, I mean with lines like that I’m starting to wonder how exactly…’ David expertly spun him round and kissed him in one move. Then pulled back raising an eyebrow. ‘Well ok I can see how.’ Patrick grinned. ‘Now shoo or your breakfast will be burned and I know you well enough to know what your priorities are.’

‘You are correct.’ David said seriously.

‘Plates.’ Patrick said. He heard David filling the kettle behind him and clattering plates, opening the fridge for juice and milk, he smiled at the hum of background noise, then plated up the eggs while David made the coffee.

David turned around to see Patrick setting breakfast on the table. He looked around the now immaculate apartment- the unmade bed aside- and at Patrick, in his sweats and hoodie for a Sunday lounging around his apartment, thought of his own hair not styled and his oldest comfy jeans. It suddenly seemed a lot and he froze tea in hand staring.

‘David?’ Patrick frowned, ‘Breakfast?’ he gestured and David shook his head and sat down with the mugs. ‘Really you’d better not be thinking of rearranging the furniture my back won’t take it.’ Patrick said, starting to eat.

‘No, actually I was thinking how good it looks in here.’ David mused.

‘Well we have your impeccable taste to thank obviously.’ Patrick joked, then realised David was still looking serious. ‘David?’ he asked again.

David looked down, embarrassed, ‘I just...like this for you.’ he said looking up with a half smile. Patrick smiled back.

‘Me too.’ he said, knowing what David meant. It felt important, it felt like a step even if they weren’t technically doing it together, it felt like a step. ‘Eat your breakfast’ he said with a smile he tried to hide.