Work Text:
Terezi: Announce beginning of your first top-secret club meeting.
TH4NKS FOR JO1N1NG MY N3W S3CR3T G1RLS ONLY CLUB 3V3RYON3
BUT B3FOR3 W3 G3T ST4RT3D, 1 H4V3 1MPORT4NT F1RST-M33T1NG BU1SN3SS TO 4TT3ND TO!
W3 N33D TO VOT3 ON WHOS GONN4 B3 PR3S1D3NT
1T'S 1MPORT4NT FOR 4NY CLUB WORTH 1TS S4LT TO H4V3 GOOD L34D3RSH1P 4ND L4W 3NFORC3M3NT >:]
Vriska: Attempt to seize power.
I’m gonna 8e the president!!!!!!!! No one’s 8etter at 8eing the 8oss than me.
:33 « actually vwhiskers, i think terezi should be purrsident! i mean, this club was her idea, right?
right! what she said!
besides, she’s already standing at the president’s b0x. i s0rta assumed terezi was already 0ur leader.
1T W4S 4 T3MPOR4RY M34SUR3
UNL3SS YOU 4LL W4NT M3 TH4T B4D
H3H3H3
You guys have no taste in leaders! You know I would be soooooooo much better at it than her.
s0rry vriska
but every time we play t0gether, you’re kind of...well...
:33 « mean!
exactly
Wussies.
W3LL L3TS M4K3 1T OFF1C14L: 4LL 1N F4VOR OF M3 4S PR3S1D3NT?
4LL 1N F4VOR OF VR1SK4 4S PR3S1D3NT?
Vriska: Fail miserably at seizing power.
1M AFR41D YOUR3 OUTNUMB3R3D ON TH1S ON3, VR1SK4!
BUT DONT WORRY, YOU C4N ST1LL H3LP M3 PUN1SH CR1M1N4LS 4ND STUFF >:]
Hmph.
SO NOW TH4T W3V3 GOT TH4T OUT OF TH3 W4Y, L3TS T4LK 4BOUT TH3 RUL3S!
1V3 4LR34DY GOT TH3M PR3P4R3D
T4K3 C4REFUL NOT3 OF TH3S3
3SP3C14LLY TH3 TH1RD ON3
No one’s going to steal your dum8 stuffed dragons, Pyrope.
TH3YR3 C4LL3D SC4L3M4T3S, S3RK3T
4ND SOM3ON3 TOT4LLY M1GHT
TH3R3 4R3 4 LOT OF D4NG3ROUS CR1M1N4LS OUT TH3R3 YOU KNOW
Psh. Even if there was someone who would actually try stealing them, they wouldn’t 8e any match for me. Stop worrying, geez.
:33 « don’t worry terezi, i’ll make sure to purrtect them!
:33 « no one likes it when their friends get stolen from them
:33 « i’d be sad if someone took my kitties :(
yeah
so what are we going to do in this club?
W3LL F1RST YOU SHOULD TR41N TO D3F3ND OUR HID3OUT FROM EV1L BOY 1NV4D3RS!
L3TS GO F1ND SOM3 ST1CKS
:33 « shouldn’t we get someone to guard the clubhouse first? Y34H YOUR3 R1GHT I’ll do it! 4ND OUR NUMB3R ON3 VOLUNT33R VR1SK4 OP3NS H3R MOUTH ONC3 4G41N! Yes!!!!!!!! Finally I get to do something! CMON 4R4D14 4ND N3P3T4 Vriska: Guard. I dare anyone to try and mess with me. >::::) Then the others won't underestim8 me anymore. Vriska: Be five-minutes-into-the-future Vriska. Wow, this is actually pretty 8oring. There’s no one to fight! Vriska: Go to sleep.
GOOD TH1NK1NG N3P3T4
YOU W1LL B3 4 V4LU4BL3 M3MB3R OF OUR R4NKS >:]
SH33SH YOURE D3T3RM1N3D
BUT 4LR1GHT, F1N3
JUST PROM1S3 YOU’LL K33P MY SC4L3M4T3S S4F3
W3V3 GOT ST1CKS TO F1ND
I think I'll just take a little nap until the others get 8ack. It's not like anyone's actually going to try to steal the scalem8s. How dum8 would that 8e.
Eridan: Be having been spying on the girls all along.
ill showw them to make a secret club wwithout me
hehehe
wwell ter, if your scalemates are so important to you, maybe ill just borroww one real quick
and i wwont givve it back until you let me in the club
so there
***
Terezi, Aradia, and Nepeta: Return.
GOOD JOB 3V3RYON3, TH3S3 WILL D3F1NIT3LY DO TH3 TR1CK
are y0u sure these sticks aren’t a bit big
d0nt get me wr0ng im all f0r pr0tecting 0ur clubh0use fr0m evil f0rces but i d0nt want t0 actually hurt any0ne
DONT WORRY, 1M 4N 3XP3RT 1N TH3 4RT OF R3STR41NT >:]
1LL T34CH YOU 4LL TO H1T H4RD 3NOUGH TO ST1NG, BUT N3V3R H4RD 3NOUGH TO L3-
Terezi: Trip over Vriska.
-4UGH!
8waagh!
:33 « woah! are you guys okay?
8wa – oh, yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.
VR1SK4! W3R3 YOU SL33P1NG!?
Um........
YOU W3R3 SUPPOS3D TO BE K33P1NG W4TCH! WH4T 1F SOM3ON3 GOT TO MY SC4L3M4T3S WH1L3 YOU W3R3 SNOOZ1NG?
Oh come on! I didn’t sleep the whole time, and while I was awake I didn’t see anyone-
OH MY GOD WH3R3S M1SS STR4WB3RRYTOOTH
...Wait, what?
1 L3FT M1SS STR4WBERRYTOOTH R1GHT H3R3 4ND NOW SH3S GON3!
Wow, someone actually took it???????? What a loser.
hey terezi, s0me0ne left a letter on the fl00r
4 L3TT3R?
it seems to be a rans0m letter fr0m eridan
he says he will 0nly give back miss strawberryt00th if we let him int0 0ur club
TH4T PR1CK! HOW D1D H3 3V3N KNOW 4BOUT TH3 CLUB?
:33 « maybe he was spying on us
:33 « it wouldn’t be the first time
UGH
VR1SK4 WHY D1D YOU H4V3 TO F4LL 4SL33P
1 KNOW YOU TH1NK MY SC4L3M4T3S 4R3 STUP1D BUT 1 4T L34ST THOUGHT 1 COULD TRUST YOU TO K33P W4TCH FOR TH3 S4K3 OF TH3 CLUB
OR 3V3N JUST SO YOUD H4V3 4N 3XCUS3 TO BULLY SOM3ON3
I didn’t fall asleep on purpose. It was just getting really 8oring sitting there, okay? Why should I have to suffer just for some dum8 stuffed dragons?
Y34H, W3LL M4YB3 YOU SHOULD H4V3 THOUGHT OF TH4T B3FOR3 YOU S1GN3D UP
NOW M1SS STR4WB3RRYTOOTH 1S 1N D4NG3R 4ND 1TS P4RTLY YOUR F4ULT
JUST 1M4G1N3 TH3 HORRORS SH3 M1GHT B3 GO1NG THROUGH R1GHT NOW
1 HOP3 YOUR3 H4PPY
Well if you h8 me so much, Miss Pyrope, may8e I’ll just le8ve your st8pid clu8 so you can pl8y with your st8pid stuff8d dragons all d8y without m8 around t8 spoil your fun!!!!!!!!
F1N3! GOOD R1DD4NC3!
Fine!
Vriska: Start to feel guilty.
I really didn’t mean it, though...
I guess I kind of failed misera8ly at proving myself.
Vriska: Know what you have to do.
Terezi: Be comforted by your other friends.
:33 « don't be upset terezi, we will get your scalemate back! ampurra couldnt have gone far.
yes, we will get that miss strawberryt00th back in n0 time!
TH4NKS YOU GUYS
1 KNOW W3 W1LL, R34LLY
BUT 1T W4S 4 STUP1D 1D34 TO L34V3 MY SC4L3M4T3S 4LON3 W1TH H3R
SH3 1S JUST SO 1RR1T4T1NG SOM3T1M3S! 1T WOULD B3 N1C3 IF M4YB3 SH3 COULD NOT GO OUT OF H3R W4Y TO 4NNOY M3 FOR ONC3
i kn0w
but i think y0u sh0uld g0 after her
vriska may be mean sometimes, but i d0nt think she was actually trying to get y0ur scalemate st0len
F1N3, I GU3SS
YOU GUYS ST4Y H3R3 4ND GU4RD TH3 TR33HOUS3 UNT1L 1 G3T B4CK
***
Eridan: Be smug about how well your plan is working.
man this is so easy
i should havve tried somthin like this sooner
Hey jerk!
wwha-
Give me 8ack that scalem8 or I’ll make you pay!!!!!!!!
howw did you find me jesus christ
Pure luck!!!!!!!!
yeah wwell just cuz you found me doesnt mean you can get ter’s dumb dragon back
howw are you gonna get me to let go of it huh
you cant make me givve it back
Yes I can! I’ll just...I’ll...
Um........
Vriska: Get an idea.
wwhat are you doin
are you pickin somethin up
oh my cod seriously wwhat are you doin-
OHMYGODSPIDERINMYFACEAAAAAAAA
Ahaha, sucker!!!!!!!!
hey get back here-OH GOD THE SPIDER IS STILL THERE
***
Terezi: Search for Vriska.
VR1SK4
VR1SK444
G33Z VRISKA G3T OV3R H3R3
4R3 YOU TRY1NG TO F1ND SOM3 OTH3R WAY TO P1SS M3 OFF >:[
VR1SK4! TH3R3 YOU 4R3!
W41T, YOU S4V3D M1SS STR4WB3RRYTOOTH?
Yeah. Here.
Vriska: Apologize.
And...um...
Y3S?
Look, I’m sorry about falling asleep on watch, okay? I didn’t actually mean to let your stuff get stolen. And your scalem8s aren’t that dum8, I guess.
H4H4H4 OH WOW
What? What’s your pro8lem?
VR1SK4 S3RK3T 4CTU4LLY 4TT3MPT3D 4N 4POLOGY!
1TS 4 M1R4CL3
What, would you rather I took it 8ack!?
N4H
1 4CC3PT YOUR 4POLOGY, R3LUCT4NT 4S 1T W4S >:]
Oh. Well, uh...thanks.
YOUR3 W3LCOM3 >:P
4ND TH4NKS FOR R3SCU1NG M1SS STR4WB3RRYTOOTH
Um, yeah, wh8ver. You're welcome. I mean, you'd 8etter 8e grateful. I risked life and lim8 to get her back.
You should have seen the look on Eridan’s face when I threw that spider at him! It was priceless. >::::D
YOU THR3W 4 SP1D3R 4T H1M? HEHEHEHE YESSS TH4T’S 4W3SOM3
Wasn’t it????????
L3TS GO B4CK TO TH3 CLUB NOW
W3 ST1LL H4VE CLUBHOUS3 D3F3NS3 LESSONS
THOUGH S1NC3 YOU 4PP4R3NTLY 4LR34DY GOT TH3 H4NG OF 1T, I SUPPOS3 YOU C4N B3 MY CO-T34CH3R >:]
Really????????
Er, I mean - well obviously! Who else is 8etter qualified?
Prepare yourself, Pyrope. I’m gonna show you and the others just how much 8utt I can kick. >::::D
DONT HOLD B4CK >:]
W3R3 COUNT1NG ON YOU
And I won't let you down this time!