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Chapter Text

Trembling, Zuko brushed his fingertips across the bandages which wrapped half of his face. Even at the gentle touch, he hissed in pain and jolted, yanking his hand away. His uncovered eye flickered to the other end of the room, drawn to the small looking glass set on a table. Though blurry, he could vaguely see his reflection. His head had been shaved; the hair having had caught alight in the struggle. He supposed he was lucky it had been put out. He had felt the slight stubble of his hair growing back, confusing him. How long it had been since the Agni Kai?

His uncle had refused to give him a straight answer that morning. He’d quickly changed the subject and introduced the healer, who had been hovering by Zuko’s side checking his pulse. Frustrated, he hadn’t said another word to either of them, ignoring the healers’ questions and Iroh’s pleading to let them help. He simply stared at the looking glass until he was alone.

Laying back in the bed, Zuko sighed. All he wanted was the truth, some reason to his father’s reasoning. He’d accepted his fault for the Agni Kai, after all he’d questioned his fathers will, offending the crown. Yet, not matter how hard he thought, he couldn’t understand where he was or what he was doing there. He knew he was on a ship, he wasn’t that stupid, but he knew nothing of its heading. He shut his eye and shifted his head, pressing his uninjured side against the pillow.

Perhaps, if had continued staring at the ceiling, he might have heard the boards creaking outside his cabin, drawing closer. He would have noticed the door slowly creaking open, a large bulky figure creeping in. However, his left side was rendered useless, his eye and ear covered and unusable. It wasn’t until a hand clamped over his mouth, fingers digging into his bandages, that he knew something was terribly wrong.

Dizzy from exhaustion and the sudden pain, he could do nothing more but weakly hit the arms that hauled him from the bed. He attempted to scream, but both his nose and mouth were covered. He couldn’t breathe. Scratching at the hand, he fought the best he could as he was quickly taken from the cabin and down halls.
The biting cold air hit what little of his face that was uncovered, not that he had time to take note.

Growing faint, he began to fall limp. Moment before he slipped into unconsciousness, he felt the arms release him, falling downwards until he was met by the harsh, uneasy waves below.

-
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-

Violently coughing, he forced the water out from his lungs, rolling onto his side. His face burned, the saltwater stinging in the exposed wound. He grabbed at the ground below him, confused to find sand falling between his fingers. Taking heaving breaths, he hesitantly opened his right eye. The world was a blinding haze. The sun was too bright for him to see much of anything.

Dragging himself upright, Zuko fell straight back down, his head swimming. He gasped and continued to cough. Everything hurt. Legs shaking, he stood again and stumbled forward blindly. He walked until he felt sand turn to paved stone, ignoring the spasms of pain wracking his body, rising each time he fell.
That was, until he found it unbearable. He tripped on a raised part of the path, falling down and hitting his head on his burned side. When he moved to look up, his head dropped again as the dark dragged him back.

Feebly reaching forward, he saw blurred people running towards him in blobs of green and gold seconds before his eye shut once more.

-
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-

“Where is he?”

In a flurry of panic, Iroh stormed around the ship while the crew searched for his injured nephew. After finding the child’s cabin empty, a feat Zuko would not have managed by himself in his weary state, he’d ordered a vessel-wide hunt. Regardless of their loyalty to the crown or the General, the idea of a heavily burned child being lost (no one dared to think someone would be so cruel as to take him) was too harsh for the crew to handle.

“General-“ A boy, half-dressed in his uniform, ran forward to Iroh and jumped back when the man whirled around to face him “I uh… I think I found something.”

Something.

Not someone.

“Show me.”

Leading the General to the far side of the ship, the boy pointed down at the waves- more specifically a thin strip of bandages caught on a nail trailing along in the waves. Iroh’s hands balled into fists at his sides. He knew his nephew would not have had the energy to stand, much less walk from his quarters onto the deck and haul himself over the side. He’d also hoped that he wouldn’t dare think of such an option.

“-ral…General?” The boys voice brought the man back to the situation at hand, his hand hesitating by his shoulder.

“The entirety of all those aboard will gather on the deck, now.”

“Sir?”

“That is an order.”

Taken aback by his harsh tone, the boy scrambled back and rushed off to tell his crewmates. In no time, each and every sailor, cook, and attendee Ozai had provided his brother with stood on the ships deck. Iroh recognised a few of them, some having had comforted him when he first boarded and his nephew was carried off to the healer. To think one of them had caused his death, it was almost unimaginable.

Most refused to meet his eye from fear of offending him, some looking around in confusion and others lost in deep thought. Yet there was one, a large man standing in the middle of the crowd, that stared straight ahead, face blank. Iroh looked around some more and turned to the boy, who had returned to his side.

“The gentlemen with the beard and no uniform, who is he?”

“Uh… I don’t know. He must be the kitchen staff that boarded last minute.”

“I see.”

-
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A soft hum wraps the room, pulling Zuko from his sleep. He recogniser neither the singer nor song, yet it all felt so painfully familiar. Confused in his comfort, he opened his eye and did his best to look around the room from his awkward position on the floor.

Sat, cross-legged, by his side was a young girl. Perhaps a little younger than him, she looked nothing like the Fire Nation nobles he was so often surrounded by. Her hair, a light brown that barely brushed against her shoulders, and her blue eyes looked strange to him. If her face was not enough of a clue, her green and brown clothing were all he needed to realise he was no longer in the Fire Nation. She held a small wooden spoon, a bowl balanced on her knee. She had been trickling the water into his mouth but stopped when she noticed he was awake, smiling down at him.
“Stay here, I’ll be right back.”

He might have snapped back that he couldn’t move if he tried if he was in better conditions (Iroh had told him not to ‘bite the hand that feeds you’). It wouldn’t have mattered anyway, as she was already running away, calling out for someone.

Left alone with his thoughts, he tried to sit. His arms felt weighted and, no matter how he tried, would not move an inch. This was not from his injuries, however, it slowly dawned on him. He was simply tired. Between everything the last week (now that he thought of it, he wasn’t sure how much time had passed), he’d forgotten how exhausted he was. Finding the bedding comfy, he relaxed his body and closed his eye again.

His peace did not last long. The girl returned far too quickly, now joined by a strangely dressed woman. They carried their self with pride, perhaps some kind of leader or mentor to the girl.

“My name is Kelii,” The woman kneeled by his side, concern written across her painted face “I found you on the beaches of Kyoshi Island. Do you know how you got there?” Kelii spoke softly, her eyes flickering from his face down to the rest of his as she talked. The girl stood awkwardly in the doorway.

The name ‘Kyoshi’ felt familiar to Zuko, vaguely remembering it from his studies. It belonged to one of the past Avatars, an earthbender who had lived for over two hundred years. He was definitely in the Earth Kingdom, he would have to watch what he said.

“I was on a ship with my uncle,” his voice was strained and inflicted with an uncomfortable rasp “While I was resting, I was grabbed and thrown overboard.”

Her eyes widened in shock. He wasn’t sure why, there was no scenario where a burned thirteen-year-old washing up on an island could carry a happy story.

“What is your name?”

Zuko hesitated and said the first one that came to mind, other than his own “Lee.”

“Lee, do you know where the ship you were on might be docking next?”

He went to shake his head but instantly regretted it, pressing his head a little harder into the pillow to hold still “No, he never told me where we were heading.”

“How old are you?”

“Thirteen.”

“Only a year older than Suki,” Kelii muttered under her breath, her hands balling to fists on her lap, and continued in a louder voice “Our healers have told me your condition has improved the last week you’ve been here, but you must be confined to bed rest. I can’t let you leave, else you hurt yourself even more, do you understand that?”

“I know how to look after myself.” He whispered and looked away from the woman, back up at the ceiling. Zuko knew he was being impolite but he didn’t care.

“I’m sure you can Lee, but you’re too young to travel by yourself, let alone in this state.” Kelii sighed “Those on Kyoshi Island have managed to stay separated from the war, the rest of the world has not been so fortunate. I will not send a child to navigate that alone.”

“How long do you expect me to stay here?”

“It’s safe to say, unless your uncle manages to find his way here, it will be a while.”

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The girl, it turned out, was the Suki that Kelii had mentioned. According to her, she had been tasked with watching over him the last few days on the Island while he slept. When Kelii left, the girl (who Zuko had presumed to be shy) began to talk and would not stop. Luckily for him, she did manage to explain a few things between her meaningless chatter.

Kelii was in fact a leader, though not of the Island and instead the Kyoshi Warriors. They were the group that protected the people who stood refuge on Kyoshi, dressing in similar garb to the Avatar who the land had been named after.

Suki was training to join their ranks, only having another two years before she’d be able to become a member. She was supposedly one of the more promising in her class, catching Kelii’s eye and becoming a possible successor.

Zuko spent most of the days in the next week alone. Unfortunately finding himself unable to sleep, he would often wake in the early hours of morning, from either the sunrise or memories haunting his dreams. He focussed on recovering, glad to quickly regain his movement, surprising the Islands healer with his progress.
He surprised Suki too, who’d bring them their meals after her classes, teasing him about his desperation to not let her help him.

“Don’t you dare.” He shuffled away, his voice deadpan.

“Aw, come on, it’s just one bite!” She wiggled her chopsticks, which held a small piece of chicken from her bowl, in front of his face “What, too proud to let a girl feed you?”

“I couldn’t care less about you being a girl, I am perfectly capable of eating by myself.” Zuko scowled, holding up his own chopsticks as if they were a weapon.

“Oh, in that case-” She began to stand, taking her food with her.

“No!” Zuko leaned forward suddenly, grabbing onto the leg of her trousers “I, uh…”

“See, I knew you liked me.” Suki grinned and sat back down, leaning against the wall by his side. She elbowed his side and continued to eat. Zuko watched her for a second, drawing his bowl closer to him.

“Why do you keep coming here?”

“What do you mean?” She asked through a mouthful of food.

“Are you trying to make fun of me?” His voice cracked halfway through his sentence and looked away in embarrassment “I don’t need you pity, you know.”

“Woah, no pity here, I promise,” Suki frowned and wiped her mouth with her sleeve “I come here because I want to. Sure, Kelii asked me to keep an eye on you while our healer was busy and it was pretty boring at first, but I don’t have to be here. There aren’t many newcomers to Kyoshi, if you can’t tell, sorry for being interested.”

“You keep treating me like a child.”

“Lee, we’re both kids. I’m literally twelve.”

“But-”

“No, your talking privileges are confiscated, eat your food you moody lump until you realise, I’m trying to be your friend.”

“You can’t-”

“Eat.”

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When he was finally allowed to walk around and leave the hut, he’d only planned to look around the Island. Suki had painted a beautiful picture in his mind and he could only spend so long cooped up inside. He wanted to see the streets, the lanterns, the people. Of course, the moment Zuko stepped out of the door, he was pounced on from behind and lifted a few inches off the ground in a very tight hug. He didn’t have to guess who it was, no one else spoke to him other than Kelii (who did not seem the hugging type), Yan (the healer whose name he kept forgetting) and, last but not least, Suki.

“Moody!” She spun him a little, laughing as he struggled in her grip, and finally released him back onto his own feet “How does it feel to be free?”

“I’m not free, Kelii made it very clear I’m not allowed to leave.” He scowled and took a small step away from her, afraid he might be picked up again.

“Aw, come on, don’t be stubborn Moody.”

“I have a name you know.”

“True, but this one fits you so much better,” Suki grinned. She grabbed Zuko by the arm and dragged him along down the dusty road “Lighten up won’t you, this is exciting!”

The people passing by stopped to wave (mostly to Suki but some sent a warm smile to Zuko) and crowds thickened as they grew closer the heart of the Island. Swapping his arm for his hand, Suki led the way, keeping a slow enough pace for Zuko to look around. The task was hard enough already with one eye still covered by bandages, so he appreciated the extra moments.

“Where are you taking me?”

“That’d be telling!” She was practically skipping along, bouncing with each step.

“I like telling, telling’s a good thing.”

“Stop being a kill-joy.” Drawing to a stop, Suki spun around to face Zuko, arms stretched wide “Welcome to the dust pit!”

“Sounds terrifying.”

“You’re a fast learner,” She snorted and waved to someone behind him. A small group of girls, dressed in similar training clothes to Suki, approached “Meet my classmates, classmates meet Lee.”

The smaller of the lot, a girl with two large buns on either side of her head, emerged from the pack and grabbed Zuko’s hand “Name’s Hua. So, you’re the sad person Suki’s been looking after.”

“I’m called Lee.”

“Just call him Moody.”

“Please don’t.”

“Well, Moody,” She snickered as Zuko sent a harsh glare Suki’s way “What brings you to the dust pit?”

“I really don’t know, I was ambushed and brought here against my will.”

“I was just getting to that,” Suki slung an arm around his shoulders and started to walk “This is where we train. Since we’re a few months away from becoming proper Kyoshi Warriors, Kelii showed us this place to train as a team.”

“That still doesn’t explain why you kidnapped me.”

“So dramatic. You mentioned the other day you were taught how to fight with swords, so I thought you might get a kick out of seeing us beat each other up.” She grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him to sit on the deck to the nearby hut “Who knows, when you’re feeling better, I might even beat you up too.”

“I’ll look forward to it.”

Chapter Text

If he was sure of one thing about Suki, it was that she kept her promises. After being given the go-ahead by Kelii and the healer, with the promise to keep his bandages tight Zuko was permitted to restart his training. He’d already read enough material to continue practicing alone with Dao swords (he’d been gifted a pair as a ‘well done, you’re alive’ award), but he was lacking when it came to hand-to-hand combat. It took little convincing from Suki to join her training sessions. He’d seen her team fight, they were terrifying.

The first few evenings were hard. It’s true he was nowhere near a prodigy in the Fire Kingdom, at least under Ozai’s standards, but Zuko had hoped that he would be on Earth Kingdom Islanders level. He’d stormed out of the session with a bruised body and pride.

Part of him wanted to scream, to punch the walls and walk away, another wanted to cry. It seemed no matter where he went, he was to be the weakest. That was when Suki had found him, curled up in the darkest corner of the hut they shared. Without a word for the first few minutes, she sat by his side and watched the sun set between the gaps in the homes.

“Silver for your thoughts?”

“My thoughts are worth gold at the very least.” He grumbled, his face squished in his knees, pulled close to his chest, and wrapped up by his arms.

“Of course,” She nudged him gently, drawing him to look up at her “You know, I understand what you’re feeling.”

Zuko scowled “No, you really don’t.”

“Well, maybe not exactly, but I got the gist,” Suki rested her head on his shoulder “When I was younger, my aunt gave me her old Warrior fan and taught me a few moves. I spent ages practicing them until they were perfect. That’s when Kelii saw me, jumping around outside my house, and let me join a lesson with the older girls,”

“I was shit. I mean, really bad. They kicked me on my butt in no time but I kept getting up, trying the same thing. Eventually, Kelii took me to the side and said I wasn’t ready unless I could adapt. So, I did. It felt horrible, admitting I wasn’t there yet and they were better than me, and it was a lot harder than I’m making it sound.”

“What’s your point?” He grumbled, rolling his eyes.

“I was amazing at what I knew, but when it came to facing off actual warriors, I was nothing. And, hey, I get it. You may not want to admit you’re wrong. No one does, it’s a sucky feeling,” She sighed and sat up straight, looking Zuko dead in the eyes “But if you don’t, you will never learn. You will keep insisting there’s nothing wrong with your way of doing things, and maybe where you’re from it’s how it’s done, but this is Kyoshi.”

“What else am I supposed to do?” He threw up his arms in frustration and hit his back against the wall “You people aren’t giving me a chance!”

“Listen,” Her voice turned hard, but not unkind “You’re going to make mistakes, we all do, but you will keep making them unless you accept change. So, for Spirits sake, let us help you.” She sighed and slowly rose to her feet, rubbing at her eyes “It’s getting late, Lee. You should get some sleep.”

With nothing else to say, she walked inside.

Out of stubbornness, Zuko stayed on the deck for a little longer with his thoughts. He always found comfort in his anger, it was familiar and- to him- felt right. Yet when the gentle winds began to grow cold, he followed her path and went inside.

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After that sunset talk, Zuko returned to his lessons with a new found energy. Suki stayed with him for the first half, demonstrating and instructing him on Earth-Kingdom techniques. Though they were a bit harder and sharp than what he was used to, he caught on quickly and barely managed to keep up with Hua when she persuaded (read: forced) him to spar with her. Naturally, he spent most of the sparring on the ground, flat on his back with his wind knocked out of him, however he found it growing easier to get back up each time.

At some point, Kelii took her break from her duties to watch. Though she made the young warriors jump out of their skin when she first called out advice, fixing one of the girls stances, they continued their practice.

“Lee,” She beckoned him over “How are you feeling?”

“Better than when I first arrived.” He shrugged, brushing the dust off his clothes, and checked his cover. It was another of layer of material given to him to cover his bandages, keeping the dirt out as a precaution.

“That’s good to hear.” Kelii chuckled.

“Is there any sign of my uncle?”

Over the month he’d been on Kyoshi, Kelii had been asking the merchants if they’d heard anything about an elderly man looking for his nephew, but there had been nothing so far. Unable to give his or his uncles real name out of fear of being recognised, Zuko was aware his chances were slim to none. His only hope was to wait for his father to discover what had happened and send someone to bring him home.

“Nothing yet, but we’re still looking.”

“I could find him faster if you let me leave.”

“Perhaps,” She smiled sadly “But, for now, it is too dangerous.”

If he’d thought about it more, Zuko may have realised she was not commenting on his abilities and more on the bloodstained war that had infected each nation. That, if he were to leave at that moment, injured and unprepared, he wouldn’t get very far off the island.

But he didn’t and simply nodded before returning to his training with the goal of pushing himself further and before.

-
-

Since he’d first awoken in his banishment, his connection to his flame was strained. The few times he’d attempted to summon even the smallest of fires in his hands had failed and only seemed to work in times of emergency when instinct took over. To survive such harsh waters, he knew his inner fire must have kept him warm and, when he was particularly emotional, any fire around him would react, rising with his anger and swelling with joy. If he didn’t remaster his control soon, people would start to notice. It was only because he spent little time with others that he’d managed to go without suspicion, though he was sure Suki had begun to catch on when he flinched every time she would light the lamps in their hut.

However, it was easier said than done. If given the option, he’d snuff out any flames within a hundred meters of him. The sight of the orange light sent a shiver up his spine, the ghost of a hand holding his face tight, unrelenting in its grip.

So, he started small. Borrowing a small box of matches from Suki, with the threat of him using them up ending in losing an arm or two, he waited until she was busy with her private lessons. He set a short stubby candle on the floor and took a deep breath before striking the match against its box.

His arm shot away from his body, the sharp movement blowing out the stick. Zuko dropped the match and drew another, striking it again. It took everything in him not to fling the match away from him, drag himself to the wall, and bury himself under his blankets.

He held his arm out straight in front of him. Slowly, he lowered it enough for the flame to pass from match to wick and light the candle. The moment he was sure it had, he shook the match out and pushed the box far from him.

Zuko cupped his shaky hands on either side of the candle. Counting up to four as he breathed in then out, he did his best to stay calm. His eyes were glued to the fire, following it carefully as it moved and wavered in the gentle breeze straying through the home.
Ignoring his fears, he sharply inhaled, holding his breath. As he did, the tiny flame shot down, barely there. Waiting for a moment, he let the breath go and chuckled as the flame returned to it’s original size. It had worked.

Taking a second to go back to his meditative state, he decided to try something a little different. If he was able to quench the fire around him on will, he should be able to do the opposite.

Emptying his lungs of air, he brought his hands outwards from the candle. His idea worked a little too well and the fire roared, filling the room. Panicked, Zuko jumped up to his feet and forced the fire back, his arms pushing it away. For a harrowing brief moment, nothing happened.

Yet, when Zuko clamped his eyes shut and waited with bated breath. The temperature around him dropped and he felt the familiar heat leave his face.
Hesitantly, he looked down at his feet to find a single, half-melted, unlit candle sitting innocently in its base.

-
-

Zuko earned his keep on the island. Once he was able, he assisted in the same chores designated to the Islands children, even occasionally attending their classes. When he was younger and unable to begin his firebending training, he had spent many an afternoon buried in scrolls and stories in the corner of the royal library. He never failed to be submerged into the tales, regardless of if they were fiction or not. The papers were his safe haven, the parchment protecting by taking him somewhere far away.

Now, he was further from the palace than he’d ever been before and his scrolls failed to bring him comfort. In fact, many disgusted him as he listened in silence as the Islands teachers recounted the history of the four Nations.

How could the royal scholars have been so wrong? The false recounts would never have been allowed to be shelved in such a prestigious place of knowledge. Perhaps the Earth Kingdom folk were in fact the mistaken ones. How could anyone on Kyoshi know what had happened, after all they had remained out of the war to save their own skin, a selfish act.

He hovered nearby after the history lesson came to an end, pressed against the door frame. Once the last of the Islanders were gone, off home, he hesitantly approached the teacher. He was packing away the last of his scrolls and maps into his satchel but stopped, looking up and smiling at Zuko as he shuffled closer.

“Ah, Lee, how can I help you?”

“Uh, I um…” He fiddled with the ends of his sleeves, unsure how to explain himself.

“Perhaps you had a question?” The man, quite elderly and resembling Zuko’s uncle (though he was taller and quite thin) “I noticed you sitting at the back today, you seemed confused by the lesson.”

“It’s just not what I was taught.”

The man frowned. He sat back on his chair, his legs weary, and smiled sadly “Pardon me from asking, but you are not from the Earth Kingdom or the Water Tribes, are you?”

Zuko froze. He shook his head “No sir.”

“I thought not,” He gestured for Zuko to sit next to his chair, which he did “I would not be surprised that you had a rather different curriculum, Lee. You know, I’ve travelled wide and far to learn everything I could, studying under different masters. I even spent some time, albeit short, in the Fire Nation,”

“Are you aware of the grasp the throne there has on the schools?” He asked, nodding when Zuko admitted he didn’t, having had expected that answer “In the past, during times of unrest, many people in power realised the best way to bring people onto their side was to aim their views at the youth. If they were to change things, small things at first so people would not notice, it would be easier to spread their version of events. We are taught to trust the words of our teachers, it’s our job after all to tell you the truth.”

“I don’t understand.” Zuko whispered. His father would have struck him across the knuckles if he dared lie, he couldn’t bare that sort of thing. Why would he have spread falsehoods to brainwash children? It didn’t make sense.

The man opened his bag, rifling through its contents, pulling out a thick scroll. He held it out to Zuko, who took it and began to unroll the parchment “Are you familiar with what happened to the Air Nomads?”

He nodded “Their armies targeted Fire Nation troops, sabotaging their camps, and stole supplies, so the Fire Lord sent an order to remove the threat. There was a short battle against the Air Nations armies, but they were quickly subdued by the Fire Nation soldiers.”

“No,” The man softly whispered, his eyes full of pity as he stared down at Zuko “Oh child, no. The Air Nomads were Nomads, people of peace, spiritual wanderers. They were not thieves nor soldiers.”

“But there were reports from the battles.” Zuko tilted his head in confusion.

“The Air Nomads were ambushed by the Fire Nation. There was never any ‘battles’, it was genocide.”

“But…”

Zuko looked down at the scroll and unravelled more, revealing faded illustrations of mountain temples, people dressed in oranges and yellow floating on fluffy balls of fur through the sky. Children played in the air, flying around on gliders, while their elders sat in meditation. He continued to unravel the paper, searching for some form of infantry, defences in the forms of weaponry, but found nothing but the calm faces of the dead, smiling at him.

“I didn’t know.” He was horrified, his voice barely making a sound.

“I know, child, I know,” The man rested a hand on Zuko’s head, offering him comfort “but now you do. There is more to learn, too, so many lies you have been blinded to.”

Zuko brushed his fingertips against the parchment, tracing the body of the air bison, beautiful creatures. He wondered if they were truly so large in person before reminding himself that there would be no one alive to answer that.

“Teach me.” He looked up at the man, gripping the scroll tightly “Please.”

Chapter Text

Zuko was a bad liar. There was no covering that fact, if he was questioned on something he was doing his best to hide his heart would pound so quickly he was sure everyone in the world could hear it and he’d stammer over his words. It was not long until he gave up on lying unless it was for survival. It was safe to say, washing up on Kyoshi fit those exceptions.

Even after three years on the Island, he was unsure if his true identity being revealed would put him in danger. He had no plans on revealing it, Zuko was far too deep for him to come clean. He’d fabricated stories from his childhood, twisting the details so it wouldn’t sound so traumatising (his talks with Guo, his teacher, had made him realise most children were not threatened with death or treason over minor disagreements).

It was safe to say, he was also not planning on flaunting his firebending either. He went under the guise of being a non-bender, only practicing before sunset while Suki was busy elsewhere so it would not be noticed. While he’d been asked by his roommate what he did when she wasn’t around, meant to be light-hearted teasing, he’d brushed off the questions, claiming meditation as a favourite pastime.

But, of course, Zuko was a bad liar, absolutely horrific.

He’d been reading the firebending scroll on lend from Guo, given to him as a reminder of his Nation to cure his homesickness, when the sun began to dip below the horizon. Thinking little of it, he lit his fingertip and went to pass on the fire to the candle next to him.

Suki had come back early, half-way-stale pastries in hand, and had caught him red handed, his finger ablaze. Stumbling back, she didn’t wait around for an explanation and quickly left, leaving the food on the ground for the ants.

Zuko waved his hand about, snuffing the flame, and scrambled up to his feet to follow her, but she was long gone to Spirits knew where. She’d always been the faster runner. Finding himself short of breath all of a sudden, he gripped the doorframe to keep himself upright, doing his best to keep calm. As usual, his best wasn’t enough.

He kicked the pastries off the decking in frustration, he spun around to the interior of the hut. Despite staying on Kyoshi for three years, he didn’t have much to his fake name, just in case he had to travel light. Zuko had never been more relieved that he was so paranoid.

As he was bundling his clothes together to pack, a single thought made him waver. If he was to run, he’d have no chance of being believed or forgiven. He knew those on Kyoshi and they knew him, many trusting and thinking him to be kind.

While he’d always known he would leave one day, undoubtedly abruptly, he begun to wonder if he was able to do it. To stuff his things into a bag and run. Kyoshi had become his home. It was his second chance, where he’d healed and changed.

He must have been frozen there in thought for a while, only drawn back to reality when the floorboards creaked behind him.

“You’re a firebender.”

Zuko hated how shaky her voice was. She was scared. Suki, his best friend, roommate, and the person who’d stayed with him for some crazy reason through his worst, was afraid of him.

“Yes.”

“You’re an idiot.” She laughed under her breath.

He whirled around, confused “What?” Where were the accusations of being a spy, an enemy of her people?

“If you’d just told me years ago-” Suki smiled, shaking her head in disbelief. Her eyes were red and there was blood on her lip from where she’d chewed it, a nasty habit “-told us. We could have helped you, you idiot.”

“You’re not mad? I don’t understand.”

“What’s new?” She walked further into the room, sitting at the end of his bedroll “I am mad though. I’m mad that you, the worst liar in all the nations, managed to keep this secret from me.” Suki was trying to joke and smile, but now she was closer to him he could see how tired she was.

“You can’t tell anyone.” Zuko whispered “Please.”

“Okay. If you promise to stop lying to me.”

He wanted to tell her everything in that moment. To finally break after all those years, to be called his name for the first time since he was thirteen and be honest. Zuko knew, however, that it would be a promise he couldn’t keep and there would always be something he couldn’t tell his friend, because then he would have to stop pretending. He wanted to be Lee, a nobody from nowhere, who likes swords, reading, and living in peace.

“I will.”

He lied.

-

The skies on Kyoshi were the brightest Zuko had ever seen. The Fire Nation produced smoke and the towns were constantly lit up by lanterns and fires, making the stars harder to see, but the people on Kyoshi usually turned off most of their lights when the evening rolled around.

On restless nights, woken by a tight grip on his face and an echoing laugh, Zuko would slip out of the hut to its decking. He’d lay there for hours, often until daybreak and a familiar urge to rise would tug in his chest, watching the night sky.

And, on those nights, Suki would join him. He wasn’t sure how she knew to wake and comfort him, Zuko knew how to make no sound. Regardless, she would appear in the doorway moments after he’d lie down and lie next to him. They didn’t speak, they barely looked at each other, but in that silence an understanding passed between the two. A solidarity that if one lost sleep, the other would as well.

When the nightmares grew so infrequent that months would pass without them, Zuko would still sneak out of his bed to watch the stars. He was never alone.

-

-

He knew his father was not looking for him, nor was his Nation worried for his survival. Not long after he began to settle on Kyoshi, merchants each month docked on their shores. They brought new clothes, food from the neighbouring colonies, and- more importantly- gossip. It was safe to say, the supposed suicide of a Fire Nation royal, banished for the scandalous crime of attempted treason, spread as rapidly as a wildfire. Every Islander that would listen to the merchants knew Zuko’s name.
If they asked more questions, they might discover the burns the prince had been left with before his departure which would suspiciously be in the same place as Lee’s scar. Both with golden eyes and black hair. One going missing and another appearing in the same week. The Islanders may have come to care for Lee, but Zuko was their enemy.

Pretending he was ill, he was pardoned from his classes and chores to rest. He had an entire day to finish his preparations until night. The darkness would provide him cover to sneak out to the boat he’d fixed up and stowed on the shores of the island.

In that time, from the second Suki left for her training, he gathered what little he had acquired during his time as Lee, packing it all in a sack. It wasn’t much, even with a bed roll stuffed on top, but the bag held an unexplainable weight that rooted Zuko to the spot. His mind screamed for him to run but hope begged that he might stay. However, in the end it was fear that trapped him in that hut, staring down the backdoor as if he were to step through it would whisk him to another world.

There was a reason Kelii had wanted to keep him safe. A war, one his family had started and profited from for a hundred years, had left two Nations in ruins and wiped another completely. It wouldn’t be until he took the first step that he’d know if all his training and lessons were enough for him to survive.

He wasn’t sure he could do it alone.

When it came to finding someone to stay by his side as he navigated his way around the earth kingdom, his thoughts went to Suki. She had been his closest friend for the last three years, nursing him back to health and kicking the ever-loving shit out of him when he deserved it. If he were to ask, she’d likely say yes, which is why he swore he wouldn’t.

His next option was his uncle, the last of his family that’d truly cared for him. The only problem was he was nowhere to be found, likely oceans away, and thought Zuko to be dead.

Gripping his bag tighter and shifting the Dao on his back, he made his decision.

“Lee?”

He froze, refusing to turn around “You can’t make me to stay.”

“I know-” Suki whispered and stood by his side, bumping their shoulders together “-and I don’t plan on trying.”

“Why are you back so early?”

“You’re a terrible liar, Lee,” She chuckled and reached out for his hand, holding it tight. They stared at the door together “and pretty bad at keeping anything secret.”

“You’d be surprised.” He squeezed her hand.

“Where are you planning on going?”

“To find my uncle.”

“And after that?”

“Who knows. Maybe I’ll pick up a purpose on the walk there.”

“Well, once you’ve done that too, come back and visit some time.”

“I will.”

“Don’t do anything stupid.”

“I won’t.”

“You will.”

“Yeah, I will.” Taking a deep breath, for the first time that day, he faced his friend “I’m going to miss you.”

“You better.” She pulled him into a hug, lifting him an inch off the ground, and sighed into his shoulder “You should go, before anyone notices.”

Taking a few extra seconds to linger, Zuko gave a small two-fingered salute and began his walk through the woods. He heard Suki begin to choke out a sob as he left. He could barely stop himself from running back, focussed on his blurry recollection of his uncles face and pressed on.

-

-

There were times Zuko found it hard to believe in the Spirits. He knew they were real, of course, and there were times on the man-made road, formed by those who had walked before him, he felt something watching him, just out of sight. He’d heard stories of the Spirit-touched, read tales of their adventures and poured over the theatre scrolls in the palaces library.

The moments of doubt were not from spare thoughts nor were they easy to shrug off. They would remain in the front of his mind on days where he saw half-starved children, too scared to leave their homes because the soldiers were back to take the harvest they had not burned in their last visit. When he’d be forced to take another track in order to avoid towns where someone with his eyes would be unwelcome, even if it meant he’d spend the night walking instead of sleeping in an alley.

When a woman screamed for him to back away, cradling their child Zuko had pulled from the waters along with the others from the sinking boat, clutching their family close from a dreaded ash maker. When all he had wanted was to warm the child, who was shaking from the icy waters, their lips blue.

When a sense of uselessness crawled up the back of his throat, digging its claws into his insides, tearing him apart as if climbed higher and higher. When he’d waste days of his journey, time he was supposed to be spending walking, curled up in whatever camp he’d knocked together the night before doing his best to swallow it down.

Yes, he knew they were real, but he wasn’t sure if he was much of a believer.

Those memories were triggered when, on the rare occasion of finding a welcoming colony, he walked through a festival he didn’t know the name of. The people were celebrating their villages Spirits, dancing in the streets, dressing in their colours and singing.

He found a vendor, a quiet man who smiled warmly to those who strayed near his stall, who allowed him to rest with him when the evening painted the sky a peaceful palette of pinks and orange. Zuko thanked him, sharing what little food he had, and listened as the man talked about his craft. He was an artist, carving wood from the dense forests when the season drew closer, and made masks of all sizes and colours.

Zuko gazed up from behind the tables, eyes passing over the faces of Spirits. He chuckled. They would no doubt be watching the celebrations, much like their imitations were. Yet they turned a blind eye when the festivities ended and a suffocating smoke filled the air. His amusement died in his throat.

He picked up the mask closest to him. Like all the others, it was carefully hand painted, with a wicked grin and fangs.

“Keep it.” The man smiled down at him, patting his shoulder.

“I don’t have enough money.”

“There is no need,” He shook his head and guided the mask in Zuko’s hands closer to his chest “You listened to an old man’s ramblings and shared your bread. I would think of no one more deserving of The Blue Spirit.”

"The Blue Spirit..." Zuko looked down at it, staring through the eye holes “Who are they?”

“I’m not surprised you are unfamiliar; They are not widely known.” The man smiled again, excited to continue his stories “They are one of the younger Spirits and quite the trouble maker. Those who do know of them say they spent their youth sneaking out of the Spirit World when the elders were not looking, to find human villages, much like this one, and watch. They’d mostly keep to themselves, curious about us, but would intervene if someone were to misbehave. Supposedly, they would leave thieves in- ah- rather strange positions for the villagers to find.”

The corner of Zukos lips quirked up into a half-smile “I’ve definitely never read about that.”

“It’s no mystery why the poets and writers lean more towards the Spirits romances, yes.” The man grinned, fondly watching Zuko continue to wonder at the wooden mask.

After the party ended and people began to return to their homes, Zuko and the man parted ways. As he laid down in the woods, sheltered by branches and leaves, he held the mask above his head, looking through the eyes at arm’s length.

Perhaps it was time for someone the people could believe in.

Chapter Text

There was something about Gaoling that attracted gossip like flies to food.

Perhaps it was due to the high-ranking nobles that resided within its walls, sharing the latest news of people Zuko didn’t care enough about to remember their names doing something he had no interest in over drinks. Everyone he asked where he would find information on someone he was looking for, they pointed him to Gaoling tea rooms. He doubted them but it only took a few minutes in one himself for his mind to change, sending him marching to the owner and asking for a job.

Luckily for him, that particular tear room was short of staff and practically threw the apron at him the second the question was said. At first, he was a little caught off guard, but with the assistance of the other server, Kea, he gradually got the hang of things. He may not have been the best at brewing tea, but he was more than able to put on a smile and take orders, even dealing with the more difficult customers when Kea begged him to.

When he’d let slip that he was staying at an inn in the more troubling parts of Gaoling, Kea had insisted he move in with him, offering a bed and food for nothing. Zuko did his best to turn it down, but his employer had happened to overhear and soon Carin and Kea had ganged up on him. He’d had no choice.

-

Failing to duck away from Carin’s hands, messing up his hair spectacularly as he passed from the front of house into the backroom, he caught a glance of himself in the reflection on the glass. He looked like a startled fire ferret. Zuko slid the tray he’d been carrying onto the side and attempted to pat his hair down, which was immediately messed up again when Kea strolled in behind him.

“Lee, you know how I’m your favourite person in all the kingdom and you love me so much?” Kea hopped up onto one of the counters, fluttering his eyes at his friend.

“Debatable.”

“Aw come on, I’m growing on you, I can feel it.”

“What do you want?” Zuko sighed and emptied the tray he’d brought with him, placing the cups into the washing bowl.

“Well-” He stretched out the word.

“I’m not covering for you so you can flirt with the customers.”

“But Lee-” Kea whined, hitting his head back on the cabinet doors “It’s the cute boy with the freckles again, and you promised I could serve him if he ever came in again!”

“Then why are you in here?”

“Because Carin wanted me to run some errands for her,” He pulled out a scrunched-up note from his aprons pocket, a list of store names and items scribbled in quickly written kanji down one side “But this’ll take me too long and he’ll be gone by the time I get back.” Kea pouted and held out to the note to Zuko.

He sighed and leaned forward, hitting his forehead against the cabinets above him “Fine. Give it here.”

The piece of paper was stuffed into his hands, Kea already out the door heading for a table in the corner of the room. Zuko watched him greet the small group sitting around it and slowly inch closer to the freckled boy on the right. He shook his head, a smile growing on his face.

Waving to Carin to let her know where he was disappearing off to, he untied his apron and placed it on the side. He took the small bag with money left for errands as he exited through the tea rooms back door, emerging onto the busy streets of the Gaoling inner city. It was where the rich and important lived, far from Zuko’s home he shared with his co-worker.

His eyes strayed over the scribbled instructions, a list of shop names and the supplies needed. Distracted, he didn’t notice the running child until she ducked behind him and grabbed the back of his clothes.

“Act natural!” She hissed, hiding her body behind Zuko.

Before he had the chance to question the little girl or free himself from her grip, two men dressed up in some kind of guard uniform emerged from around the corner. One fully hunched over, far more out of breath than his partner was, and even the one still standing upright had to take a minute before he could form coherent words.

“You didn’t see a small girl, about this high-” He held up his hand just above his waist “Blind, black hair, green clothes come by here, did you?”

Zuko paused, contemplating his choices, when he felt the girl clutching the back of his shirt tighter in a silent plead. He pointed silently at the opposite direction he’d be going in and waited until the guards were out of sight to turn around. He batted her tiny hands away and finally got a proper look at her.

She was from a noble family, dressed in light greens with golden trim around the sleeves. Her hair, as the men had described, was a dark black and tied into a large bun on the top of her head. A few strands had been pulled loose, hanging to hide her face. From behind them, Zuko noticed her pale eyes.

“Do not touch me.” He hesitated and as an afterthought added a courteous “Please.”

He glanced back at his list and began to walk in the direction of the first shop.

-
-

Carin was a concerningly trusting woman. When Zuko turned up with two bags and a pair of swords to his name, along with a reminder of the war on his face he was politely turned away from most establishments in Gaoling. His lack of experience in any job other than sweeping and picking fights may have also not helped. However, something about his flat tone and stiff posture must have charmed Carin, the owner of a comfortable little tea shop in the middle of the city, because she offered him a job and mentioned her other wait staff was looking for a roommate.
She was patient in training him, even when he asked an irritating number of questions, and encouraged him on the harder days. Zuko caught on in no time, learning how to brew and serve the teas with ease, and gradually warmed up to the regulars. Only to hear the local news of the ongoing war and Fire Nations movements, he was definitely not invested in the gossip from the local weavers group. Not at all.

When in search for an advantage on finding his uncle, Zuko found another place to call home, so when Carin handed him a set of keys he refused to mess up his new responsibility. While Carin began to work shorter days, her partner insisting she take it easy during her pregnancy, Zuko took to closing the store.

He’d been tasked with cleaning during his stay on Kyoshi, sweeping the streets after storms and helping where needed. It wasn’t something he’d insist on doing, nor was it his favourite past time, but after a long day of serving the worst type of people (the general public) it was a chance to turn off his mind and reset.

So, when he was sweeping the main floor, humming to himself in a world of his own, and sensed something move behind him he assumed it was once again Kea forgetting everything but his head in the shop. But when he heard no nonsense-chatter as his friend rambled on about whatever managed to happen in the ten minutes since he left, Zuko’s shoulders tensed and his grip around the brooms handle tightened.

He spun around, ready to defend himself, but resisted whacking his ‘attacker’ upon realising it was in fact a small girl with no shoes sitting on the counter he’d just cleaned, legs swinging about as she grinned in his general direction.

Zuko sighed and the grasp on the handle loosened “Please get down. I just cleaned that.” He eyes the dirt on the girls’ feet, quickly glancing around the tea room to see that- sure enough- she had left a pathway from where she had sneaked in through the back door.

The child grinned, all teeth “Oh yeah? What are you trying to say, Mister?” She scrunched up her nose at him.

“Just get down before I pick you up.”

She snorted and jumped down to the floor, leaning back lazily against the counter “You know, I haven’t seen you around here before.”

“I don’t think you’ve seen anyone before.” He muttered under his breath, forgetting present company, and froze when it came out just a tad louder than he’d expected.
Instead of yelling or kicking, the girl simply laughed again, her head thrown back at the force “You’ve got me there, bean pole. But seriously, you’re not a local and word is you appeared out of thin air a month back. Kinda weird if you ask me.”

He stared at her, eyes slightly narrowed “Ah yes, because traveling for work is unheard of.” Zuko shook his head and returned to his chores “You need to leave.”

The girl pouted a little, crossing her arms over her chest in defiance “Why should I?”

“Because I’m going to lock the doors soon and I’d rather you not be here when we open in the morning.” He rested the broom against the wall in the back room, tucked behind a few boxes on the floor. Zuko patted his pocket gently, ensuring the buildings keys were indeed still there. Blind or not, something in the back of his mind warned him not to let her get a chance to pickpocket.

“What’s your name?”

He turned to see her leaning in the open doorway of the entrance, halfway out.

“You ask a lot of questions.” He muttered, turning his head away, However, when she continued to stare vacantly into the store, he folded “My name is Lee.”

She tilted her head against the doorframe and narrowed her eyes at the floor, feet- which had been shuffling about- stilled.

“Hmm.”

“Please leave.”

“I’m Toph.”

“I didn’t ask.”

“I know,” She pushed herself to stand upright, a hand lingering on the frame. Her face, which had been blank mere moments before, etched into a mischievous grin “You’re weird.”

“Okay.”

“Interesting too.”

“Sure.”

“You often close this place?”

“No,” He opened the lantern and blew gently on the light to snuff it out “But the owner is expecting a child, so I’ve been given more responsibilities. Why?”

“No reason.” She snickered and left, slipping into the near empty streets. Regardless of the lack of people, she managed to disappear from his sight.

As he watched the girl- Toph, as she called herself- go, Zuko felt he was unfortunately going to see her again very soon. Shaking off the feeling of impending doom, he locked up the store and began his walk to the home he shared with Kea.

Chapter Text

A few days from the unwelcome meeting, Zuko found himself with a day off. He’d not grown used to days off, recalling very little time to himself during his training as a younger child, and had little idea of how to spend it with Kea at work and no other friends.

After taking the morning to meditate and clean his home (since Spirits knows Kea could make enough mess for the both of them, and often did), he took a small bag of seed and wandered down to one of the public gardens. There weren’t many in the city, and they were small in size, but they were a peaceful sanctuary.

The one closest to Zuko’s new home in particular as, in the centre, was a pond. The pond itself was nothing special, his attention instead drawn to the rather cute creatures that resided within the waters. Turtledecks, an adorably fluffy little animal found in both the Fire Nation and the Earth Kingdom.

He sat on the ponds end, hand stretched out with a pile of seeds in the middle, keeping as still as he could while the more daring ducklings ventured forward out of curiosity. Any sudden movements, and they’d be spooked off.

-

A small hand held by his own, palm upwards to the sky, with a small pile of crumbs he’d taken from the palace kitchens. Azula huffed and wriggled where she sat, already impatient, and headbutted his arm, resting there after the attack.

“This is beneath me.”

“Come on ‘Zula, it just takes a little patience.”

“I’d rather go back to throwing rocks.”

“I’ve seen you sit perfectly still during your training; I know you can do it.” He was headbutted again “Ow.”

“You deserve it brother. You’ve spent so much time with mother that you’ve gone soft.” She scowled, staring at the far end of the fountain where the turtleducks were swimming “Oh by the Flame, what is taking them so long!”

“Well, you were using them as target practice a few minutes ago.”

“It’s not my fault they got in my way. I was aiming for your fat head.”

“If my head is fat then you must have terrible aim.”

Before Azula could respond, one of the braver ducklings drifted closer to them, tiny legs kicking under the water. She froze and Zuko felt her move her hand out a little further. The tiny turtleduck scrambled to hop onto the edge of the fountain, waddling over to peer down into Azula’s tiny hand.

It tilted its head to the side and, while the two children held their breaths, it must have found what it was searching for as it jumped into her palm. The duckling, quite contently, patted about until it sat comfortably on top of the crumbs.

“Brother.”

“Yes?”

“This creature reminds me of you.”

“Aww.”

“Stupid.”

“Aw.”

-

Tiny bare-feet pattered across the paving stones, then muffled by the grass. They drew closer and stopped on Zuko’s right, a tiny body plopping down next to him. He was disappointed to see he’d been torn from the fond memory by the annoying girl- who was less of a child and more a curse, or perhaps a ghost seeing as she haunted his closing shifts.

She flopped back to lie on the grass, spreading her arms and legs out in a star shape, and sighed contently. She wiggled her toes and shut her eyes, the sun warming her face.

“Do you not own shoes?”

“Why wear shoes when we were all born with perfectly good floor slappers?”

Zuko decided not to respond.

A while passed. Toph seemed fine with sunbathing while Zuko quietly fed the turtleducks. They’d gathered around him, a few sitting on his legs and another somehow climbing up to his shoulder when he wasn’t looking. To any passing nobles, they must have looked quite a sight.

“You know, you lied to me.”

“I didn’t, it’s not my fault you refuse to believe our opening times.”

“Not that, though I stand by my argument that as long as you can break in then you’re never really closed.” She bumped his leg with her foot “When we first spoke, properly at least.”

“Did I?” He barely recalled the conversation but did have the faint memory of wanting to shoo her out with the broom.

“Your name’s not Lee.”

A breath caught in his throat and his hand twitched, much to the snacking ducklings annoyance “Oh?”

“Hmm,” She tucked her arms behind her head, seemingly nonchalant to the huge bomb she’d just dropped “You don’t have to tell me though. Lots of people lie around here.”

The turtleduck on his shoulder nuzzled into his neck. Zuko slowly raised his free hand to pet them, lightly scratching under their beak “How did you know?”

“Huh?”

“When people are lying, how do you know?”

“I can feel it,” She bent her knees so her feet were pressed firmly into the ground, her mouth quirking up into a smile “Through the earth with my bending. I can feel people’s heartbeats, it gets quicker when they lie. Unless they’re good at it.”

“Oh.”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

“Yeah, I’ve been told that before.” He sighed but couldn’t resist the grin that spread across his face “Is that how you move about so well? With your bending?”

“Yep,” Toph nodded and giggled as one of the turtleducklings climbed over her feet “Who needs eyes when you can see with your floor slappers?”

He groaned “Please, just say feet.” Zuko ignored the girls laughter at his obvious disapproval “Who taught you?”

“I think I’ll keep some of my secrets. It makes me more mysterious.”

Another moment passed, the two sitting in peaceful silence.

“I think it’s cool.”

“Hm?”

“Your earthbending, the way you use it. I think it’s cool.” Zuko glanced up at the sky. The sun was well past midday and he no doubt had other things to be doing. He wouldn’t be surprised if Kea had finished off their snacks yet again “I should go before my roommate returns home and sends a search party after me.”

He tipped the seeds onto the grass by Toph, who’d gathered the attention of a few more ducklings. She was more than happy to let them scramble over her, giggling softly when their fur tickled her or when she felt their cold wet webbed feet. One of the ones later to join the group shook the water from themselves, spraying her. He paused to watch her, wondering how she could so completely relax.

He shook his head and began his walk back home.

-

-

He felt guilty about lying. Telling Kea he was ill. Zuko knew they were short of staff, but the familiar feeling had begun to stir in his stomach and crawl its way up his throat. He thought the silence would help, but now the small home they’d shared felt sickeningly empty. Yet he still stayed there, face pressed against the pillow, until midday when he forced himself to at least change his shirt- the one he slept in being the same as he’d worn the day before.

A headache was settling behind his left half-lidded blurry eye. His scar felt warm. The light brush of his hair made his hands clench and his teeth clench. He shuffled into the cramped kitchen, pouring a cup of water, and sank down to the floor. His mouth tasted like sick.

His belly growled, hungry. He ignored it. He’d eat later. Maybe. Probably not.

He must have sat there for a while, staring at the cupboard across from him, eyes tracing the grains in the wood, because a creak of a door pulled him to the front of the fog in his mind. The room was darker, candles unlit and sun having had suddenly disappeared. Zuko pressed his head harder against the cabinets, fingers gently setting the still-full cup of water onto the kitchen floor. He could have sworn he’d drunk some, surely, why else would his face feel damp.

Kea appeared in the doorway, looking down on him. They placed their keys to the store in the small bowl on the counter. For a moment the silence coating the furniture felt a little less thick.
They crouched down until they too sat on the cold floor, facing the opposite way. He didn’t speak, instead rested his eyes on his friends face, full of gentle and heart-breaking understanding.

“I-” Zuko’s voice was hoarse, his throat sore “I’m… not well.”

Kea bowed his head in a small nod, but said nothing. Zuko continued to speak to fill the gap.

“I thought I was getting better, I really did.” He looked up to the ceiling, unable to take that soft gaze, and did his best to ignore how his tiny whisper echoed “I can’t sleep, I can’t… I feel like I left part of
me in the water.” He’d never told Kea what had happened, hell he’d barely told his roommate a single thing about himself other than he’d been journeying around the Earth Kingdom. “I just-” Zuko bit the inside of his mouth, feeling more tears stream down his face and his breaths feel a little tighter “I want my mum. I want my sister, my uncle, Suki- I want to go home but I can’t .”

He was sobbing.

He was drowning and his arms were to heavy to keep fighting the waves.

A light brush of skin and Kea’s hand slipped into his, a life rope.

“I want to have a home.”

A thumb brushed against the back of his hand and Kea leaned forward, gingerly taking Zuko’s face in his hand, pressing their foreheads together.

“Stay here with me,” Kea whispered as well “Just for a while, until you can stay afloat. Me, Carin, your other friend that keeps stealing our pastries, just hold onto us.”

“I’m tired, Kea.”

“I know,” Their voice cracked on the last word and Zuko realised Kea had begun to cry too “I know, love. But I need you stay here with me; I need you to get up and stay with me for a little longer.”

Zuko closed his eyes. Something brushed away the water from his cheek.

“Can you do that for me Lee?” Kea held Zuko closer “Stay with me.”

Something that had been straining inside him for a long time, a rope worn thin and old, soaked with salt water, finally broke and he collapsed into their arms. Arms that were ready and willing to hold him together, closing the wound shut for new skin to stitch it back together.

If he were to continue drowning, if he was truly destined to sink further into the icy water, he would not do so alone and maybe- just maybe- he could trust this rope to pull him back to land and stand on his own feet.

-

He was back to work the next day. The prior night was not mentioned, but he was not alone. Kea was practically glued to his side, speaking enough for the both of them and charming their customers as usual. Carins husband had joined them later on, running the errands himself and sharing news of his wife.

There was still a dull ache in the back of Zuko’s mind and a storm in his stomach, but the routine he’d grown accustomed to had taken off the harsher edges. One of the regulars had even dropped off a small treat, a bag of brightly coloured rock candy, to wish him better, having had noticed his absence the day before.

Yet the day still passed in a blur. There were times he felt as if he were asleep, coming to up to an hour later to find his body moving on its own, emptying tables and cleaning. The sun was lowering and the tea room emptying before he knew it.

Kea was still there, Carins husband too, but they’d ducked into the kitchen/store room to reorganise the boxes, leaving Zuko time to breathe and gently sweep the floors. He was slightly out of it, not realising his peace was disturbed until he brushed a pair of tiny bare feet, looking up to find Toph yet again trespassing. He murmured an apology and moved to continue his chores but was halted as latched on in a hug, arms wrapping around his midsection. He rested a hand on the top of her head.

He felt Kea pop his head around the corner to check on his, feeling Toph stiffen up as she sensed it too, but was grateful when his friend chose to duck out of sight.

Toph pressed her face into his clothes “They said you were ill.”

“Yeah,” He whispered “I’m doing better now.”

She hugged even tighter, feeling his heartbeat stutter in a lie.

Chapter Text

With Carins husband busy taking a more hands-on position in the tea room, they found themselves without someone to make the deliveries. A few well-off nobles paid a pretty penny to have their tea brought straight to their doorstep- could you imagine them having to mingle with the common folk? Outrageous!

So, the job fell to Zuko, on a rather peaceful day. He was handed a large bag, filled to the brim with perfectly wrapped boxes with small labels, the addresses scrawled on. He didn’t mind the extra chore; his head had felt stuffy all day and the rising heat irritated his burn. Even after around three years, a stifling summer day with moisture in the air would bring irritation, a slight burning, barely a fracture of the original ‘incident’. He’d splashed water on his face, rubbed a dab of cream he’d been gifted by one of his patrons (a gentle elderly woman with a burn across her neck- it looked like a handprint), and set off, a largely brimmed hat hiding him from the sun above.

The first few stops were to some of the lower ranking nobility- a few of the ‘lords’ and ‘ladies’ going as far as to answer the door themselves. After a couple of cheek-pinches and a handful of sweets as his ‘tip’, he was strolling on to his final stop with a sweet piece of rock candy in his mouth.

Seeing it was larger and far grander than his previous stops, he peered around for a servant’s entrance. Upon finding it, he rapped his knuckles on the door and waited until it opened. A rustled woman was the one to answer the knock, and she went to take the package rather hastily from his grasp until she was interrupted by a man’s voice behind her.

“Who is it? I can’t imagine you lot get many visitors down here.” The voice was snooty, reminding Zuko of a few of the old nobles from the palace courts. Their words had been laced with honey in attempts at getting in the Fire Lords good graces, yet this speaker held nothing of the kind. Zuko supposed the man didn’t see the staff as anyone to profit off, other than manual labour.

The woman’s face twisted for a split second in annoyance and shared a short look with Zuko, a brief flash of understanding passing between the two. He knew exactly the type of man she worked for.
She turned and bowed to him, Zuko deciding to follow her example “My Lord, it is naught but a delivery boy.”

Any other day, Zuko would have scowled at the way he was being referred to, however in that moment he wanted nothing else other than go back to work.

Unfortunately, the Spirits found pleasure in his pain and decided to keep stoking the burning pile that was his luck.

The man, standing tall above the rest of the kitchen workers who remained in a low bow, sent Zuko a smile- all teeth like a predator “Ah yes. Boy, do come in, I’m sure you’re tired from your travels, no? How about a quick tour around my manor, I’m sure you’ll find it quite marvellous?”

In other words, ‘come look at my cool stuff that you’ll never afford to see again’.

Zuko bit back his comment about how more walking would be tiring, whether it be around the gits house or on the way back to his job, and decided not to mention which he found of any worth. Instead, he bowed again and courteously thanked the man for the honour.

He was steered around the grounds by a stiff hand on his shoulder and mindlessly nodded along as the man- one Lord Lao Beifong- bragged incessantly about his wealth. Zuko did his best not to smile at the fake tapestry on the corridors wall, knowing the real one was seized by the Fire Nation and showed off as a spoil in one of the guest rooms in the palace. While a rather unfortunate fact, he was glad to find some humour from it.

Beifong must have forgotten about the other occupants of his own home in his rush to show off, because as they drew closer to the courtyards, he froze. Sensing something finally interesting, Zuko scanned the yard and found two people, one a tall man and another a very small noble girl, in the midst of a lesson.

The man was lecturing her on how to position her hands, but spoke as if he were talking to a hard-of-hearing invalid. Agni, he was so condescending Zuko felt the urge to punch him from strides away. It looked like the girl was close to doing as such herself, her jaw clenched so hard it was a miracle she hadn’t broken a single tooth.

The teacher took hold of her hands and patted her on the head sympathetically “Not quite my Lady, try this instead.”

Zuko tilted his head in confusion, why had he- oh. She didn’t follow his movement at all and was essentially positioned into the right stance as if she were a child’s doll. He tilted his hat up for a better look to find her eyes were pale and glazed over. She was a blind girl.

He blinked. Hang on, he knew that blind girl. Despite her hair being different and her clothes lacking the smears of mud and dirt, Zuko knew without a doubt it was Toph he was watching. As to why she was pretending to be useless at earth bending, he had no clue.

Lao cleared his throat and forced a tight smile “Ah yes, that would be my daughter. She’d making impressive progress in her lessons, if you account her affliction of course. Master Yu- who you must of course know as the most highly regarded bending instructor- reports she is close to managing a kata!”

Resisting the urge to deck a well-paying customer in the face, Zuko nodded “I’m sure you must be very proud, my Lord.”

At the sound of his raspy voice, clear as day in the stiflingly quiet grounds, Toph stumbled in her movement, sending a gaggle of panicking servants to attend to her.

“Indeed. This way- Lee was it? - please.” Lao gestured back the way they had come, cutting the tour short, his grin strained.

-

“You were at my house.”

Zuko paused in his cleaning to find Toph, out of breath with hair still pinned back into a tight bun rather than in her face as she preferred, hanging onto the counter to count her breath. No doubt she had run there the second she could.

“I-uh, yeah.” He stood up straight and set down the cloth onto the table top “Apparently we deliver to your family.”

“You saw me,” She added breathlessly- and Zuko really wished she would wait to talk until she wasn’t so exhausted “You saw me and you didn’t snitch, why?”

“Because, you’re my friend, whether I like it or not. Besides,” He managed a small smile “If my teacher were as much of a dick as yours is, I’d probably run off too.”

-

Almost jumping out of his skin, Zuko spun around to find Toph at one of the tables, sat on the floor. He hadn't even heard her enter, only made aware by her question.

"What?"

"Are you, Mr fake-name-Lee, a bender?"

He paused in thought "Yes."

"I see."

When she didn't elaborate, Zuko returned to sweeping and shook his head in confusion.

"Are you a firebender?"

The broom slipped from his hands and he staggered forward to catch it, gripping the handle tight. He looked back at Toph who, still staring at the wall, was patiently waiting for him to answer with an innocent smile on her face. He narrowed his eyes- she’d waited until he was busy again to ask just to make him flail about, hadn’t she?

"Yes." He saw her nod, as if she'd expected that answer "How did you know?

"You're always really warm, your heart goes weird whenever someone mentions the Fire Nation or the war, and-" She grinned "-I felt you light the stoves with your hands last week."

He groaned and hit the top of the broom with his forehead "I knew someone was watching me, you put me on edge for three days straight you know." He glared at Toph and swept a small cloud of dust her way.

"You should really learn how to lock the doors properly."

“Like that’d stop you.”

-

A month passed before the Blue Spirit made its appearance in Gaoling. He’d not intended to make such a splash, but overhearing a few of the shiftier characters in the Tea Room has brought him back to the mask.

He’d told himself it was a one-time thing, he’d handle the dog fighting ring then go back to having one secret identity, not two, but perhaps the air tasted sweeter when he was flying through it in the night, swords strapped to his back and righteousness as his weaponry. It couldn’t be helped, ‘twas out of his hands, blame the Spirits for all he cared.

Sat atop of discarded crates left out behind a new shop, Zuko brushed his thumb over the mask in his hands. Near the top, there was a small chip. He wasn't surprised, with it being over two years old and constantly stuffed in a bag, he had expected it to be in worse shape. He brushed it gently with his sleeve and placed it behind his back, out of sight.

He stayed perfectly still as more drunken men and women stumbled past the mouth to his alley. Zuko ignored them all, waiting for the crowds to pass. As the loud voices grew quiet in the distance, he caught onto the patter of bare feet running against the paved streets. Leaning further into the shadows, he stayed silent.

As he suspected, Toph stepped into the light of the lanterns hanging from the sides of the buildings. She was carrying a bag of coins, her earnings for the night, and every time the money clinked together, her beam grew impossibly wider.

"Good evening."

Toph's whirled around, bag of winnings hefted up as a weapon. Zuko eyes it, it’d look like it would hurt. He stepped onto the ground, making it easier for her to feel his heartbeat, and raised his hands awkwardly in surrender.

"Lee, you piece of shit." She let out a breath, a hand reaching up to her chest, clutching at her shirt.

"Sorry."

"You better be, I thought one of my father's guards fucking found me."

"Right," An awkward silence stretched out between the two as Toph calmed herself "You were at the Earth Rumble thing, weren't you?"

She kicked out a small stone into the alley, hitting Zuko in the leg "Yeah."

"Did you win?"

Her grin returned "Yeah," Toph stretched her arms above her head and paused, her face scrunching up in thought "Hey, how come you're out here so late?"

"I- uhm," Zuko stammered and, after an internal battle with himself, hesitantly reaching out to pick up his mask. He moved and handed it to her "Here."

Her fingertips brushed over the paint and shape of the mask. She hummed to herself, offering it back to Zuko "You know, I overheard a few of the servants talking about the Blue Spirit last week."

"Oh. really?"

"Apparently he's been seen all around this part of the Earth Kingdom. He appeared here not too long after you." She smirked "He also is supposed to have a pair of swords, probably wouldn’t mind his friend borrowing them to chase her teacher around.”

"Mhm," He smiled, tying the mask to his face "It's pretty late, do you mind if I walk you home?"

"You know, I bet the Blue Spirit gives great piggy-back rides."

Zuko sighed and lowered himself to her height "Fine, get on."

Toph jumped up, hooking her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. Zuko gracefully scaled up the side of the shop and onto the roof, running across the tiles towards the Beifong residence.

Chapter Text

If the sky at night was Zuko’s sanctuary, the badger-mole caves were Toph’s. She taken him there one evening after a particularly low week for the both of them, using him as a human torch while she showed him through each of the tunnels. It was reasonably far from the main city with- as far as they knew- no one else aware of its existence, so soon became a meeting place of sorts. Zuko had expected them to use it as they did the tea room after closing hours, nothing more than a base to chat and complain about their day.

Toph, however, had another plan entirely. She also did not warn Zuko about this plan of hers, so he had very nearly been hit by the boulder she had sent flying in his direction.
“What in the blazes was that!” He all but yelled, stumbling back up to his feet. He’d had to tumble out of the way.

“Square up, Sparky, it’s training time.” She grinned, lowering into a fighting stance. The ground rumbled and rocks of all sizes rolled towards her- more ammunition.

“I’m not fighting y-” A pebble flicked harmlessly off the side of his head “Oh, it’s so on.”

-

Toph won. Zuko wasn’t really surprised, he’d not brought his Dao with him and Toph was- quite literally- in her element. She’d asked for round two but relented when he made no move to get up from where he lay, face down, on the ground. She laid next to him and rested her chin on her arms, nudging his leg with her foot.

“Still alive?”

“Mhmph.”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” She snorted, snuggling further into her arms, and yawned “I suppose we can reschedule the rematch for tomorrow.”

“Oh joy,” He huffed, turning his head so the side of it was pressed into the dirt, allowing him to scowl at his friend “What a merciful warrior you are.”

“Damn straight, Sparky, and don’t you forget it.”

“Why am I ‘Sparky’ now?”

“Well, you’re a firebender,” She shut her eyes and fully relaxed “I heard that firebenders can make lightning. You can do that, right?”

“No,” He tensed and saw Toph’s apologetic expression as she realised, she had touched a nerve “My sister could. She was always a better bender than me.”

“Putting the self-insult aside, I didn’t realise you have a sister.”

“Hm,” Zuko shrugged “She’s still back home with our father.”

“You never really talk about your family.”

“There’s not much to say,” He mumbled “I haven’t seen any of them in three years, and if I did, I doubt it would be a happy reunion. Apart from my uncle, probably.”

“What’s he like?”

“Kind. He looked after me before we were separated. He’s why I’m here, actually, I was hoping I’d hear some sort of rumour about him to chase down.” Zuko sighed and looked away “Nothing yet. I guess he’d better at going undetected than I thought.”

“Is there really no one else?” Toph frowned “Sure, family sucks, I understand that- but you have people, right?”

“Well,” He mulled the thought over “After I lost my uncle, I was taken in by a few people on Kyoshi. Their leader, Kelii, let me stay with one of her pupils, Suki. She was my best friend, kept me out of trouble, got me into different trouble. I’m not sure what I would have done without her.”

She was family to him, only lacking in blood. Yet, a nasty part of his mind reminded him, that still hadn’t been enough for him to trust her, had it? He’d left her alone, waiting for ‘Lee’ to come back home. The rest of his soul had been laid bare to her, though not all on purpose, but it was his name he’d held back, the last thing that was truly his alone.

He looked at Toph. She knew about his bending, his whole ‘mysterious past’, and had put so much faith in him she’d shown him her only safe place her family couldn’t dig their claws into. A second home where she’d found a new power, a chance for her to be independent, and a secret not easily shared.

What was stopping him? The thought of rejection, for one. The idea of his third chance at a normal life being ripped away, driven out for being their enemy’s son, the first heir to the Fire Nation throne. The look on Carin’s face alone might kill him, but Kea? Toph?

Or what if word of the banished prince running through the Earth Kingdom reached the ears of his father? What it-

Toph kicked him again.

“Hey, don’t think too hard, you might burst something.”

“My name isn’t Lee.”

“Yeah,” She chuckled and yawned once more “We’ve been over this dumbass.”

“You can tell when I lie, right?”

“Again, also been over this.”

“My name is Zuko.”

She paused, sensing the new weight the conversation had gained “Cool. Yep, definitely a Fire Nation name. I’d say it suits you but I wouldn’t have a clue.”

“I’m the banished Crown Prince of the Fire Nation, first born of Fire Lord Ozai.”

Well. Toph had certainly not expected that.

Silence echoed through the cave and filled Zuko’s lungs.

“Huh,” She processed his words and found herself caught on one in particular “Banished? How’d you manage that?”

Zuko looked at her as if she had professed her love for the banjo and walked face first into a tree while singing sailor tunes- which is to say, crazy “That’s the part you want to talk about?”

“Well, I mean,” She smiled awkwardly “I bet it’s got quite a story to it, right?”

He supposed she wasn’t wrong. Zuko told her what had led to his banishment, censoring a few parts. She was still a small child, after all, don’t let her colourful swearing fool you. Once it was all done, he
found himself apologising. For not telling her sooner, for lying, for not trusting her. At least he tried to, he was interrupted almost immediately.

“Shut up, you turnip-head,” She snorted and shuffled across the dirt to trap him in a hug “I’m not going to lose my friend because his dad is a dick.”

“Sorry- ow!”

“Hug me back, you dolt.”

-

Sometimes, the bad days seemed to sneak up on him, but thankfully time had grown him used to spotting a few of the early warning signs. Food lost its taste, he’d find himself sleeping in later or not at all, and basic tasks to take care himself seemed as arduous as climbing mountains with his arms bound behind him. Zuko had begun to slip back into old worrying habits and was at least the slightest bit grateful to have noticed. He did however suppose there could be better places for the realisation it was getting bad again than a rooftop in the middle of the night.

He untied the ribbon at the back of his head, allowing the mask to drop into his awaiting hands. Zuko’s fingertips brushed over the grooves and grains, lifting it to press against his face, forehead to forehead.

If he were to close his eyes, he could pretend someone was sitting across from him, holding him back. That the mask had another wearer. That if he were to sway and fall, harder than each night before,
someone would leap right after him to lift him back up. He’d been alone for so long, without his friends or charred remains of family, was it so wrong to wish for the Spirits to guide him? For his shoulders to be relieved of choice?

A memory whispered in the back of his clouded mind, of old hands grasping his tight and a benevolent gift.

If he had to be miserable, why not do so with company?

-

Toph’s cackling lifted his spirits (pun well intended) as they hopped from roof to roof, the girl clinging to his back and digging her knees into his sides to spur him faster. They’d spent the last few minutes racing around the inner city, turning shop signs upside down, lifting tables and chairs that shop owners had forgotten to bring inside onto rooves, and in general causing mischief. Zuko wondered, for a brief moment, if the Blue Spirit could see him embracing his masks namesake. The fond thought was waved off by Toph squeezing his neck even tighter as she came up with a new plan of attack.

Zuko smiled. He may not wear it tomorrow and the night might be long, but the promise of morning would push him to see the next sunrise.

-
-

There was a coldness that resonated in the Beifong residence. A feeling of disconnect that stopped the building from ever becoming a home for the families youngest and only heir. Toph could keep her
windows locked tight, her bed piled with furs, even light the room with as many candles as she could swipe from the servants' cupboards, but the chill always found the back of her neck. It stood the hairs on their ends.

The garden was different

Even through the coldest of winters, Toph felt a comforting warmness from the flower beds and in the centre of their growing bush maze. It was her refuge in the caging walls. When that manor froze her insides, she would be thawed in her solitary amongst the plants.

After a particularly frosty dinner with her parents, it was again the garden where she found herself heading. Following the familiar path through the hedges, she arrived in the empty space in the middle of it all. She kneeled down, ducking her head low enough not to be spotted over the budding bushes that wrapped around her hiding spot.

She stayed still, listening to the earth around her.

Gingerly, she shifted off the ground, sitting in a way that her feet were raised, set on her lap. Toph pressed her palms to the dirt and reached out for anything.

She sensed the roots embedded in the earth, the wriggling of earthworms and the like, but her sight stopped short. It had only been a week since she'd begun to see with her hands, a suggestion from Zuko that had burrowed into the back of her mind.

At first, she'd only practiced with him by her side, watching guard to calm her paranoia. Toph refused to even try in her house or in her rumbles, not trusting the surroundings. Yet in the garden she was alone and covered, away from the cruel whispers of the serving ladies, the pitying remarks from her father's business 'friends', and the worry of the guards.

Her fingers dug into the earth, sinking as deep as her hands would allow her, at one with her element. She giggled as she felt a worm change its course, avoiding her fingernails. She watched as it continued to wriggle away and deeper into the ground.

Then a rumbling began.

It wasn't much, not at the beginning, closer to a hum in the ground than anything. Then it grew louder, loud enough for Toph to catch hasty footsteps scrambling through the spiral maze. Whoever the intruder was, they knew little of the maze's structure, reaching two dead ends before deciding to hop the hedges.

Pushing herself to her feet, she focused on her senses, looking for anything to use as a weapon. One of the gardeners had to have left some sort of tool, anything with a sharp edge. Spirits, why did the staff have to be so competent!

The steps stopped, perhaps a meter or two from her. Maybe it was the shock of seeing a little girl, but the stranger hesitated for a few seconds. It was long enough for Toph to feel a warmth radiating from his body. While it was certainly dimmer, it was similar to the same she felt from Zuko and no one else.

The sign of a firebender.

She stepped back, raising her arms to pull at the ground around her, ready to defend herself. Not knowing what she was doing, the man must had assumed she was surrendering and winced. Toph faltered. Her arms hovered in the air, her fingers twitching into her palm. He breathed, quick and adrenaline fuelled breaths.

Voices in the distance, unnoticed in the strange crossing of paths, raised above the gentle wind and sent the man running again. He sprinted past her and down the correct path, following her barefoot prints to the exit.

Toph stumbled back and held onto a branch behind her to regain herself, a chill cutting through the air.

The worried shouts from her family's guards were nothing more than background noise as she was guided back into the manor. She was silent as her maids fussed over the dirt under her nails and scolded her for ditching her shoes once again. She stayed that way, throughout her mothers' words and her father’s dismay, only breaking out of the daze as she felt the blanket underneath her, clutching the covers of her bed.

They were cold.

She waited until the guards walked down the corridor to swap with the next shift, grabbed one of her many candles, and left. Taking the less scenic route, Toph ran through the city and into the mountains, up to her cave.

Zuko was waiting for her. He was fiddling with the straps of his mask but stopped when a panting Toph burst through the entrance, hands clenched at her sides. He put the Blue Spirits face down and met her halfway in the cave, pulling her into a tight hug.

Toph pressed the side of her face against his chest.

Warmth.

"I heard the Fire Nation soldier took a shortcut through your house," He flattened down the top of her hair, picking out a leaf "I caught him not far from it. He's been arrested. You're safe."

"He could have killed me." She murmured.

"Well, don’t be too disappointed." Zuko scowled and sat the both of them down on the ground. His hands latched onto hers, which were still shaking.

"He was running from the guards in my garden," Toph shook her head "How the hell did a Fire Nation soldier even get there in the first place?"

"Funnily enough, I asked him that," He tried for a weak smile, recalling the short minute he'd had to speak with the remarkably young soldier "He's a deserter, ran from his division over a week ago. He was going to go through the mountains, but he was spotted by a hunter, ended up running through the city by accident to escape."

"He just wanted to be free?"

"Oh, I wouldn't sympathise for him too much. Some of the things he called the earthbenders that arrested him, I was tempted to knock him down again," Zuko sighed and looked away in shame "Agni, I hate to say it but he reminded me of myself not too long ago."

"What are you talking about?" She rolled her eyes "You lived on Kyoshi, everything you've told me about Suki shows she beat that snob stuff out of you."

"I may have recovered on Kyoshi, but I was born in the Fire Nation. Until I got the chance to see the world for myself, I still believed everything my tutors had taught. That the Water Tribes were savages, and the Earth colonies were primitives. My people are told we're superior to the rest of the world and doing them a favour by seizing power."

Toph's face screwed up in disgust and confusion.

"What the fuck."

"For the first few days I spent on Kyoshi, I thought the warriors were waiting to kill me. Most find it honourless to fight the weak and unarmed, so I assumed when I was healed, they'd hand me a sword and demand a fight. I refused to sleep for a while, just in case." Zuko remembered passing out not too long after, only to wake and find Suki by his side after carrying him inside to rest "Over the years, my opinion of the Earth Kingdom and my father may have shifted, but a small part of me still believed in the war. That we were doing the right thing and, if I could find my uncle, we could remove Ozai from the throne and fight for our own victory."

"What changed?"

“I shouldn’t say. It’s not… it’s not a happy story, Toph.”

“Tell me anyway.”

He paused in brief conflict.

"I saw what our victory would mean for the world itself. Villages were burning, people dying and kidnapped for no reason other than their bending," Zuko felt his mouth dry at the memories "There was a boat. A few families from the Earth Nation had been rowing away from their home since the war reached them. They'd sprung a leak a mile from the shore and were sinking."

He released a shaky breath he'd been holding and continued "I saw them in the distance and started running to help. By the time I got there, they-" Zuko squeezed Toph's hands gently, this time for his own comfort "I could see the bodies floating behind them. There was a little girl, maybe six or seven, that was just being pulled under by the waves, again and again. She wasn’t fighting it anymore."

"Fuck."

“Yeah, fuck." He let out a hollow chuckle "I helped as many people as I could to the shore. There was a boy, his mother handed him to me and begged me to save him first. I could barely hold him, he kept struggling and screaming for his sister. When most of the people were on the sand, two of the men joined me in dragging the bodies out of the water. Most were fine, only taking in a breath or two of water."

His head hung forward "I'd dived for the girl and carried her to her family. I tried to help her- I did- but she was already gone. I'd taken off my mask to resuscitate a few people by then and, Spirits, their faces when they saw me." He bit his lip and ignored the shake in his voice "They were scared."

"Why?" Toph whispered.

"Because it's not hard for the seeing to figure where I'm from," He half-heartedly joked "I was everything they were running from, caught up to them and holding their dead child."

"But you were saving them. You said it, you rescued them and tried to help the girl."

"It doesn't matter. That soldier today, he was running just like I once was and wanted no part of the war, but that didn’t suddenly make him a good person. He didn’t forget what he’d been taught. It didn't stop the people here from being angry and afraid. Tonight, he didn't hurt anyone, he barely put up a fight against me. He just gave up."

"I don't understand."

"Neither did I," Zuko paused, unsure of what to say "Those people wanted to be safe from a war my family is responsible for. I was planning to continue it myself, but after seeing that child look at me like that... I knew we- I was wrong.”

"I've never heard about anything like that happening."

"Not many boats make it across the sea, and it is not the sort to make most old ladies gossip, at least not the kinder ones." He squeezed her hands again and redirected some of his body heat to warm them more "You know, this may be the worst way I've tried to comfort you yet."

Toph snorted, breaking the thick tension "I dunno, you’ve got some tough competition," She leaned forward to hug him again, grabbing at the back of his clothes, unable to reach her arms all the way around his torso "Thank you."

"Come, I'll walk you home."

Chapter Text

Tiny brown eyes blinked vacantly at Zuko. Carin was holding her child on her lap, bouncing her knee up and down, as she chatted with Kea, every so often glancing to smile at her babies staring contest. It had been going on for around a minute, ever since they’d sat in the closed customer area of the tea room. Kea had also noticed and was doing his best not to laugh.

As they continued to talk, Carin gently lifted the baby, little Shui, and moved them carefully into Zuko’s arms, moving his hand to support the head. Zuko went to ask her why she’d handed her the baby (I mean, he didn’t really come across as babysitter material) but she’d already turned her head, leaving him with a wordlessly warm smile. He looked down. Shui looked back up at him. She raised her chubby little fists, grabbing at his face, waving them about in the air. Shifting her a little, he copied her, wiggling his fingers above her, cracking a grin as her eyes widened in fascination. He booped her, very gently, on the nose and felt his smile widen as she started giggling.

Zuko entertained her for a while longer, allowing Carin a well-needed break and time to check everything in her store. Eventually, Shui began to yawn and curled up into Zuko’s chest, one hand tangled in his shirt, sleeping peacefully.

He slowly rocked her in his arms. He vaguely remembered when Azula was that size, how his mother had been in bed ill after her birth and asked Zuko to carry his little sister for her.

When her mum returned to take her home, she stayed fast asleep.

-

Remembering Azula was both a gift and a curse.

There were days he’d avoid her like the plague, terrified to be in the same room as her- because it was times like those he was truly scared of her. She’d get a manic glint in her eye and a sharpness to her movements, most commonly after her one-on-ones with Ozai or conversations with their mother.

Then there were the short and oh no comfortable moments between Zuko and his little sister. When she was younger, she liked to picked up- their mother had joked she longed to be taller- and would spend hours on his shoulders, tiny pudgy hands tugging on his hair. His hair would often end up in her mouth, but he found he did not mind. Not that much, at least.

When she grew older, in between their lessons, they’d hide together in the gardens. They’d always had a knack for finding each other, regardless of whether one was high up in a tree or crouching by the roots in the dirt. She’d repeat whispers from the servants, sharing gossip about the ‘fools in the kitchens’, and the two of them would giggle quietly so not to be caught. Then they’d bicker when they inevitably were, blaming the other for being too loud.

The lighter, rose-tinted, memories made it difficult to love her. He was wary of the cruel princess that still stalked the gold-gilded halls, feared for the little child he’d left behind, and longed for Azula, his sister.

If only, Zuko thought to himself as he watched Toph choke on her snacks in laughter, they had the luck to be born elsewhere.

-
-

Fumbling for the empty teacup as it slipped from his tray, Zuko regained his composure and spun around to the table behind him. They were a group of his usual's, one of which being a soldier for the Earth King on leave after losing his leg, that were a great source for gossip.

"Pardon?"

"Sorry Lee, didn't mean to make you jump like that," The man grinned at his favourite server "Everyone's talking about it!"

"Since when has the Avatar been back?"

"Oh, for a while, from all I’ve heard," The man scratched at his chin and paused in thought "I know he was on Kyoshi Island, and I bet he had something to do with the sky going dark last month."

The conversation continued as Zuko stood there in shock. He gripped the tray tighter and headed for the kitchen, absentmindedly going about his chores. As he scrubbed at the washing, he leaned slowly forward until his forehead hit the cabinet door, again and again.

Kea, who had just come to join him, another dirty tray in hand, chuckled a little at the sight and poked him in the cheek “Lee? You alright, you look as if you’ve seen a ghost.” Zuko stopped thumping his head against the doors and let it rest there, taking a deep breath, trying to remain calm.

“Lee?” Kea slowly moved closer, voice careful and low, and gently reached up to back to rub small comfortable circles “Love? What’s wrong? Do you need to take a breather?”

He shook his head, heaving himself back to stand up straight. Kea did not remove his hand and instead moved closer “I’m fine,” He cleared his throat “Do you mind if I take my break?”

“Sure man,” Kea smiled softly “We’re not busy right now anyway. Did you bring lunch with you?”

“No.”

“That’s alright. If you go sit outside, I can bring you something in just a tick.” Kea nudged him in the side and gave a light nudge towards the door.

Zuko nodded and slipped out from the tea room, tucked away from the street behind on the doorstep. It was just big enough that, if he turned sideways, he could bring his feet up as well and lean his head against the frame.

The Avatar had returned. That was quite literally the last thing he had expected to hear. He groaned; his father was most likely already aware. With such a powerful player back on the board, after so long, Ozai was undoubtedly making moves to remove the guy now his victory was at stake. Would the war move closer to the larger cities? He doubted Gaoling was at risk, what with the mountains encasing it, but what about the rest of the Earth Kingdom? Oh spirits, what about Kyoshi?

Panic gripped his heart. He knew the Island had remained a neutral power, for better and worse, but the chances of such peacefulness being allowed to continue was low. All you need do was look at the ruins of the Air temples. What was Suki doing? Did she already know? Were the Kyoshi Warriors preparing for battle? Were they even still alive?

His Uncle.

Oh, by Agni, his uncle.

Where was he? Why wasn’t he there? He needed- he-

The door opened and Kea crouched by him, hesitant hands hovering over his body. Zuko’s chest was tight, breaths coming out in short sharp sobs, and his nails dug into flesh.

“Hey,” Kea whispered, cupping the side of his friends face and gently pulling one of the clenched hands away from his arm, bringing it to press flat against Kea’s chest “Can you match my breathing for me?”

Zuko shook his head, hitting it against the doorframe in frustration.

“Hey now, none of that, come on I’ve got you.” Kea wiped away his tears “Come on, let’s do it together. Breathe in, that’s it, and out. You’re doing amazing love, that’s it, in… and out.”

He leaned forward until he was curled into Kea’s chest, clinging onto the front of his shirt, and tried to focus in on the thumb brushing over his cheekbone in a repeating pattern.

-

Toph would find him there, alone, when the sky faded to a subtle pink. Everyone else had gone home, Zuko volunteering to close the shop himself to make up for his ‘extended’ lunch break, and he’d found himself drifting back to the same doorway, again bringing up his knees to his chin.

She sat with him too, weaselling her way into his arms for a hug, head turned sideways, flat against his chest.

“It’s never going to be over,” He whispered “All this fighting. My father, he’s never going to stop until he gets what he wants.”

Toph didn’t respond. There was nothing she could say, really. To insist otherwise would be a lie and she’d never been one for false hope, that only left the harrowing truth, which she refused to speak, because then it was real. How the Earth Kingdom was waiting with shallow breaths for the fighting to be brought upon their doorstep. That many colonies had already been taken, silently, and no one dared raise the issue or declare violence back, because the oh-so-smart leaders still clung to their doomed peace. Perhaps, if they just turned a blind eye, sacrificed a few hundred unimportant lives, their own citizens, then everything would be fine. Festivals, parties, and nobility could continue without so much as a glance outside their windows.

Thinking about it made it real, so it was best not to think.

“I have to kill him,” He held her even tighter, his voice painfully empty as he accepted what would likely be his fate “I can’t keep running, Toph. I was banished once for cowardice; I will not survive committing the same crime.”

“But the Avatar-”

“Is a child.”

“So are we.” She huffed out a sigh and adjusted her head, getting comfortable “Why can’t we live a normal, boring old life, like we’re supposed to.”

“No one can take that from you, Toph, but I was born for a purpose. I have a duty to my people.”

“You-” She jabbed her pinkie, which she had definitely not been filing the nail of, into his side “have a duty to yourself and me. Wherever you go, I’d like to see you try and stop me from following.”

“Your home is here.”

“I do not have a home,” She went mumbled “I have a house that I am trapped in with a bunch of strangers that insist they’re my family. My home is with the people that don’t have to tell me they are. And honestly, the scenery is starting to get a bit dull.”

He snorted “Like you’d be able to tell.” Zuko brought up a hand to tuck her head properly under his chin and held her tight.

“You’re not getting rid of me, I’m like a rodent.”

Still smiling, he patted her head “Okay, we stick together, just don’t start biting me.”

-

On the road he’d travelled light, there was only so much he could fit in his bags and could bare to haul around night and day. In Gaoling he’d grown complicit with the fantasy of a regular citizens life, he’d gathered trinkets, useless nothings he had no real use for, more clothes than he needed.

When he first started gradually giving them away, Kea slept in his room for a month, moving a mattress to the floor next to his bed. Carin would watch him like a hawk and bring Shui with her more often.

As they became less wary, he’d managed to shorten his belongings (the necessities at least) down to two bags.

-

Toph was infamous for managing to throw you completely off your game with a short sentence, it was one of her specialities in the ring. Yet out of all her lines, the six words ‘the Avatar is in my house’ kicked Zuko a thousand miles into the sky with the soul crushing horror it carried.

She’d stormed into the shop, not too long after closing, as Kea was still sweeping the floors and Zuko washed the cups to announce them. The former had dropped the broom on the spot and Zuko missed the cup he’d been scrubbing entirely, punching the wall.

Quickly recovering from the shock, he’d grabbed Toph’s wrist to drag her away from his very nosy co-worker, who was staring at the small child in awe. In the back alleys, Zuko grabbed her by the shoulders and demanded an explanation.

“I’m not sure what else you need to know Sparky, there’s a visitor in my house, and it’s the Avatar.”

“You have to know how little that explains,” Zuko huffed, dragging a hand through his hair, now loose from it’s tie after a busy day at work “Why? Why was he there?”

“He’s looking for an earthbending teacher, heard about me kicking ass at the rumbles, and figured out where to find me.” She grinned “My reputation proceeds me.”

“Are they here to stay?”

“Until they find a teacher, speaking of which. The dude travelling with him was asking about you.”

“What?” His voice did not raise any octaves, that’s slander.

“Not you you, the I-can’t-understand-my-emotions-so-I-beat-up-people-at-night you.”

“I’m not sure if that’s better or worse. Why, what am I going to teach the freaking Avatar?”

“Other than bad choices? Not a clue,” Toph batted his hands away, quickly brushing over her friend’s panic “But he managed to be annoying enough that my dad overheard him, invited him to dinner,
almost outed me as a badass to my folks, yada yada. Anyway, long story short, he wants me to join him and his friends to go beat up the Fire Lord and solve world peace. So.”

“So?”

“Are your bags still packed?”

-
He’d been planning to leave the city for a few weeks, lessening the weight of his ties, studying maps and recalling the routes he’d taken to Gaoling. It’d been so long that he’d almost forgotten that it would mean, at some point, it would end with. You know. Leaving.

Now that he was rummaging through his room, stuffing the few last items into his bags, dressed in his Blue Spirit clothes and mask tied hastily to his waist, it was begging to hit him. He’d already had his last shift, his last morning in the apartment, the last time he’d see his friends, all without knowing. He wouldn’t have time to say goodbye, let alone leave some kind of note.

Any minute now, the Avatar and his team would be preparing to leave, likely ready to go the minute Toph passed along word that she’d accepted their offer. He only had so long to run and join them.

“Lee?”

He whirled around to see Kea, still in his apron, standing in the hallway. His eyes flickered from the bags to his hip, where the mask stared back.

“You’re leaving?” They blinked a few times, their own words still processing in their mind.

“I’m sorry.” Zuko whispered, standing up straight to face his friend.

“I-I don’t understand.”

“My name is not Lee,” Because fuck it, his chances of coming back to Gaoling alive were low, regardless of whether he told the truth “It never was, my name is Zuko, first born to the Fire Lord, and I am the Blue Spirit. The Avatar is here, I am going to join him and face off Ozai, with Toph. And I am so, so, sorry.”

Frozen in time, the seconds moved by agonisingly slow, and a part of Zuko grew stronger in its desire to stay put, claim it all to be a joke, and be normal for once.

Kea moved forward, grabbing Zuko in a bone-crushing embrace, and took a shaky breath “Okay. It’s okay.”

Zuko held him back just as tightly, burying his face into their shoulder “I should have told you sooner, I should have been honest from the start.”

He laughed with a sob lodged in his throat “Love, if you’d shown up at the tea room claiming to be the Prince of the Fire Nation we would have slammed the door in your face and thought you insane.” Kea cupped the side of his face gently “This is a lot, but it would never stop us from caring for you. Not even the Spirits could, if they marched down here themselves.”

“I have to go.”

“I know, love, I know. Promise to come back?”

“I-” Zuko dug his hands into the back of his shirt, holding his breath as he tried to remember everything Kea had just said. His hands loosened and he stepped back, the distance between them stretching into miles “I have to go.”

-

Running as fast as he could with a person on his back, Zuko practically flew through the air, Toph shouting directions directly into his ear. People on the streets below were looking up in shock, pointing and gossiping about their secret protector, the night-time vigilante suspiciously out during sunlight.

They skidded to a halt at the outskirts of the city, past the Beifong estate, at the sight of a hefty pile of fluff that Toph proclaimed as a sky bison. It has a large saddle secured on its back, two passengers ready to go upon it. One a small child dressed in colours perhaps too bright to maintain a low profile, the other a slightly older looking girl, clearly water tribe and surprised at the sudden appearance.

By the bison’s feet was another water tribe child, a tall boy, who’d been tossing up bags to the others to be secured down. His jaw had dropped at the newcomers, his eyes permanently fixed on both Zuko’s masks and Dao on his back.

Toph dropped down and jogged ahead to greet them, leaving Zuko to continue lugging their bags around, approaching the water tribe boy. Quickly introduced by Toph as Sokka, he didn’t stop in his gawking, not until Zuko dropped the bags by their feet and pushed the mask to the top of his head. He wasn’t sure it helped as Sokka’s eyes only widened more.

“I’m Lee.”

Toph tilted her head slightly at the name, but said nothing.

“Hi Lee!” The bald kid waved down from the saddle “I’m Aang, you must be the friend Toph said was gonna join us.”

He nodded “Our running here likely drew attention from the people in the city, we should be fast in our leaving to avoid any problems.”

At the nudge to get a move on, Sokka snapped into action and scooped up their bags, throwing them up to Aang, who floated them up the rest of the way and helped Katara tie them down. He went to offer Toph a hand up to the saddle, but she’d already marched back to Zuko and demanded he pick her up again.

Bending at the knees, Zuko leaped up to the saddle, gently landing next to the Avatar. He held out a hand to Sokka, who rushed to take it and scramble up to join them.

Chapter Text

Wedged between a wriggly Toph- who had been fast to decide she hated flying- and a starry-eyed Sokka, Zuko found himself coming close to doubting his decision. After the third elbow to the ribs, he’d sighed and wrestled Toph to lean on his side, passing her his mask to fiddle with. With the other hand, he pushed the stray hairs that had snuck out from his phoenix tail, and in doing so noticed two sets of eyes glued to him.

“May I help you?” He raised an eyebrow, quickly becoming uncomfortably self-conscious.

“You’re the Blue Spirit.” Sokka glanced between Zuko and the mask (which Toph had begun sticking her fingers through the eye holes, waving them about like worms) as if that point had not already been made very clear.

“What my brother means to say it,” Katara elbowed him in his side, much to Sokka’s complaint, and smiled “Is that we heard a lot about you on our travels. If I’m honest, I was beginning to think you were not real.”

Zuko shrugged “I could have said the same for the Avatar,” An awkward moment passed in silence “If it’s not too much trouble, Toph didn’t exactly tell me where you were headed.”

“Oh, well right now we’re trying to find safe places to rest while Aang and I train our bending.” She gestured between the two “But we’re mostly moving further into the Earth Kingdom.”

He tilted his head, interested in how she’d said the word ‘safe’ with a sigh “You’re being pursued by someone?”

A dark look crossed Katara’s eyes “The Fire Lord is sending more people after us by the day, and his latest are pretty hard to shake off.”

“I can’t remember the last time I had a full night’s sleep.” Sokka sighed and tilted his head back, leaning very casually against the side of the saddle, sort of stretched out into any free space he could take up.

“I’d be willing to share my bodyguard, for the right price of course.” Toph piped up.

“I am not your bodyguard, I’m your babysitter.”

“Oh please, if anything it’s the other way around.”

Katara watched the bickering with a small smile “Actually, if you’d be able to stall them when they catch up to us, that’d be pretty helpful.”

“Do you happen to know their names or ranking?” He frowned. He doubted his uncle would join such a search, but surely it wouldn’t hurt to ask.

“There was Zhao-” She didn’t notice him shiver slightly at the familiar name “But after the whole ‘trying to destroy the moon’ thing, we haven’t seen him around. I guess that was too far, even by the Fire Nations standards.”

“That… would explain the sky a few months back.” Zuko nodded slowly “From what I know, Zhao is a cruel General with no real loyalties to the Fire Lord. Most believe he will back the largest power figure that’ll turn him a blind eye.”

“Sounds slimy.” Toph mumbled.

“Yeah, he looks it too.” Sokka agreed.

At the front of the Bison, Aang turned around and announced their landing. They lowered into a small clearing, just enough open space for the bison to comfortably settle with a yawn. Zuko lifted Toph and set her down on the solid earth, much to her overdramatic delight. Ignoring that she was lying face down in the grass, Zuko offered his hand to Sokka.

The boy hurriedly took it with a stuttered thanks and climbed off the bison, glancing around at their digs for the night. Zuko eyed their joined hands and raised an eyebrow at him. Sokka stuttered a cough, letting it go. Ignoring whatever that was, he turned to Katara, who was already pulling out a few blankets.

“Are we camping here?”

Katara sighed again “We probably shouldn’t, we’re far too close to Gaoling for our liking. It’s more of a quick stop to give Appa a break.”

Aang nodded along “Poor guys been working his tail off.” He stretched out his arms and hugged the bison’s side, sinking into the white fur. He said something else but was far too muffled to make it out clearly.

Zuko felt something nudge his foot, looking down to find that Toph had rolled over, face up “Can I help you?”

She grinned and held her hands up, making grabby motions. With a resigned huff, he bent down, scooping her up under the armpits, and set her back onto her feet.

-

Perhaps they rested for too long, caught slipping while they were still growing used to their new party members, but either way it was only around an hour until the ground began to shake. No one realised at first, too blissfully relaxed as they chatted around the sleepy bison, but when the ground trembled Toph shot up in alarm.

Katara rushed everyone onto the saddle and Sokka pulled out the map. Aang frowned, leaning by Appa’s ear to whisper an apology, before taking hold of the reigns “Yip yip!” Slower than before, Appa rose to his feet and launched into the sky with a jolt.

Ensuring Toph had a firm grip on the saddle’s sides, Zuko slid to the back, searching for the source of the rumbling. Scanning the tree lines, he caught quickly onto movement far in the distance. Trees swaying and harshly tearing away as a split began in the forest. A beam of sunlight catching on metal draws him further in. Whatever it was, it was fast, ripping through the trees with alarming ease. He was far from wanting to have a closer look.

-

They flew for hours until the threat was long out of sight and, by the time the sun dipped below the horizon, they managed to set up camp around the sleeping bison. Aang was closest to the animal, curled right into his fluffy side, a blanket around his shoulders- courtesy of Katara. Sokka and his sister weren’t too far away from the kid, about an equal distance from Appa and the crackling campfire. Sokka’s leg had strayed from his blanket, however, and was close to kicking Katara in the side.

Toph had rolled herself in two blankets and wormed her way to Zuko, who still sat around the fire. Embers and ash drifted up into the air, flickering out. Sitting still, close to the campfire, Zuko took the time to finally breath. In and out, the flames moving with his breathing, as the fire gently burned through the kindle. It wouldn’t last long, there was little left untouched.

Sokka did his best to quietly joining Zuko, just as silent as his awakening had been. Cross-legged by his side, he nudged him softly and smiled, eyes half shut from exhaustion “Not tired?”

He shook his head “Usually, I’d be wearing my mask on the streets of Gaoling at this time. It feels… strange to be elsewhere.”

“Homesick already?”

Zuko shrugged.

“I suppose I am.”

“I know how you feel, it’s been ages since Katara and I left our village, but I still wake expecting to see Gran-Gran and the others.” Sokka shook his head. With nightfall, he appeared to have mellowed out, oddly calm. Zuko had been unaware he knew how to sit still “We left the Water Tribe for the first time with Aang and even though I miss it, I can’t imagine going back forever. Not after all this, there’s no ‘normal’ to return to, really.”

He hummed in agreement.

“When I was younger,” Speaking slowly, half doubting his words and prepared to take them back at any moment “I was raised in the Fire Kingdom. Because of the war, I was sent away and through an accident, ended up traveling by myself. If I were to pick a ‘normal’, like your Tribe is for you, I think it’d be Kyoshi.”

“You’re from Kyoshi?” Sokka’s eyes lit up, the gears in his head turning as it dawned on him “Oh damn, you’re Suki’s friend?”

“You met Suki? How is she?”

“Good, man, she’s all good. She helped us out with some trouble, that Zhao guy, she’s a total badass.” He zoned out for a short moment, mind lost in the
face paint and fans “Kyoshi was almost perfect, how come you left?”

“My uncle. I need to find him. It’s why I ended up in Gaoling. If anyone does much of anything, the people of Gaoling hear about it.”

“Why’d you join us then? Because of Toph?”

Zuko stopped breathing. The flickering light dancing across his face didn’t show much, the sadness in his eyes hidden by the shadows, yet Sokka sensed the shift in mood, leaning a little closer to him.

“Gaoling was fine, I have friends there, and I promised Toph if either of us were to go, it’d be together, I just-” He sighed, the long exhale pushing the flames down until the clearing was mostly lit by the moon “I think I stopped feeling like a person. I was going through the motions, doing everything I was supposed to; I showed up to work, I did my job, I went home. It seems I was not built to stay in one place.”

“I think I get the feeling.” Sokka mumbled, leaning closer to Zuko, his head resting lightly on the boy’s shoulder “Back home, I tried to train some of the kids. All the men went off to fight ages ago, my dad included, so as the son of the chief and the oldest guy still around, I figured I may as well do something responsible.”

Zuko huffed out a tiny laugh “How did that go?”

“Oh, terribly,” Sokka grinned, looking up at him without moving his head “They were more interested in whacking each other with sticks that listen to me drone on and on about how to build the snow walls and spear fish. They’re just little kids, y’know?”

He nodded.

“Well, I’m not sure when, but at some point, I must have just gotten used to the pattern of things. I’d wake up, try and wrangle the kids while the older women did their normal chores, then go fishing with Katara. Nothing had changed, really, it was what we always did, but somewhere along the line I stopped being… y’know, awake for some of it.”

His heart stuttered every so slightly. For all her trying and wanting to understand, Toph had never quite grasped the pure emptiness Zuko felt. Kea, bless his heart, did all he could to comfort him too but he didn’t get it. And now here was a complete stranger, someone he’d known for less than a day, bearing his soul to him around a light in the dark only to find it just as worn out as Zuko’s.

He breathed in deeply, then out, giving the fire a light push to keep going.

-

Naturally, they don’t rest for long.

Toph had suddenly bolted upright, still wrapped in her swaddle of blankets, announcing something was coming. Sokka, after letting out a very manly scream, awoke the others as Zuko grabbed their bags with one hand, hoisting up Toph with the other. Before you could say ‘hey, why were you two awake?’, they were up in the sky once more.

Assisting Toph in her escape of her soft prison, Zuko wrangled the blankets away before rearranging them around his friend. He guided her head to rest on his chest, mumbling for her to go back to sleep, and tucked an arm around her just in case Aang decided for any jerky evasive manoeuvres.

“Who in the Spirits plane is up at this time?” He grumbled, casting a glance over his shoulder at the metal thing tearing towards them.

“Right? It’s like she doesn’t sleep, or something.”

Zuko frowned “She? You’ve known who was chasing you this whole time and- what? Forgot to mention it?”

Sokka had the decency to look sheepish “Well, in my defence I’m really tired.”

It was the truth, Zuko supposed, he certainly looked it “What’s their name?”

“Oh,” He paused in thought, scrunching his eyes shut as he wracked his brain for the answer “Oh yeah, Princess Azula of the Fire Kingdom.”

Chapter Text

Zuko did not sleep that night, nor for much of the next.

They all took notice of it, Katara would try to convince him to get some sleep, Aang would look sad whenever he would say no, and Sokka would sit right by his side to take over watch in the case of him changing his mind. His mind was set in stone, however, and Sokka would sleep whilst sat on the floor, half-upright, with his head rested on Zuko’s legs.

The only person in the group to quietly accept his aversion to sleep was Toph, not that she was particularly happy about it. The difference was that she had witnessed these nights before. She had been the Katara, the Aang, and even the Sokka, trying to stop it. It had never worked and, being the only one fully aware of why he refused to shut his eyes for more than a second, she offered the occasional waterskin or snack.

Then, one night, when the moon was full and Sokka was fast asleep, propped against Zuko’s side, she sat with him. It had been a while since she stayed up for anything, too used to late mornings and early nights to last long, but on a random evening she dragged her blanket over to the campfire and dropped on his free side. A tiny hand slipped out from under her pile of blankets, grasping his tightly.

For a while, they did not speak; they did not have to, which was why it was such a surprise for Zuko to talk into the silence.

“I can feel something, down in my gut. Like when I was a child, back home, and Azula and I would go sledding down hills on serving trays when our parents were busy in court. Like I’m at the top of the hill, she’s behind me ready to push, and I get the jolt of falling in my stomach.” He squeezed her hand and with his other reached for Sokkas. “I don’t know why, or what it is, but it feels like the beginning of the end.”

“We’ve only just started.” Toph yawned, shuffling closer to him.

“I know,” Zuko mumbled “and I’m glad we left together. As good as it was for me, I would have suffocated if I stayed in Gaoling. Yet I can’t help but get the feeling this is the top of that hill and we’re about to lose our balance and crash on our way down.”

No one spoke again. Sokka was softly snoring, filling the dead air, along with the rumbles coming from Appa.

“I don’t know if I can bring myself to face her,” Zuko let out a shaky breath “I’ve spent all this time hating her and regretting it, to see her again would be the final nail in the coffin. I’m just not sure whose it will be.”

Again, Toph did not respond, for she did not know how. Yet, she wouldn't leave. She wriggled the blanket around all three of them, allowed herself to be pulled into a hug, and stayed through the night.

-

-

In the morning, the ground rumbled. Toph, of course, noticed before anyone had the chance to yawn and sent everyone to load the Bison with their things. By the time they were launching into the air, the drill was in sight.

Far too close, in fact, and approaching at an alarming speed it hadn’t possessed before. Zuko stayed at the back of the saddle, mask on, with his hands held up next to the handle of the Dao on his back.

Sokka shuffled next to him, handing the map to his sister on the way “At this rate, we’ll have to fly for the entire day straight to lose them completely.”

Aang yawned at the front of Appa, the bison too taking a moment to dip slightly in its flight, and Katara groaned “We’re almost out of food, there’s only so long we can ration the rest now there’s more of us.”

“We need a distraction.” Zuko muttered under his breath, leaning further forward.

“Uh-” Sokka drew out the word, his head whipping round to look at his possibly-insane friend “That doesn’t mean what I think it means, right?”

He scowled. This was hardly what he had planned and there was no chance Azula wouldn’t- at the very least- see the Blue Spirit if he flew down the reckless path. He glanced behind him, at the practically sleep walking Aang at the reins and the unnervingly silent, pale faced, Toph. They needed rest, all of them, and there was no chance of it with Azula so close on their tail.

“There’s a cliff not far from here, if I don’t meet you there, leave without me.”

“Katara!” Sokka turned desperately to his sister “Surely there’s something else-”

“Alright.” She interrupted him, looking right past Sokka to meet Zuko’s eyes “Be fast and don’t do anything stupid.”

“This whole plan is stupid! Toph, help me out here!”

“Bring me back a cool rock.”

Zuko rolled his eyes, not that it could be seen, and jumped.

-

It wasn’t far to free-fall. He rolled across the ground at impact, up on his feet instantly and running through the forest. Up close and personal to the drill, the first thing he noticed was the deafening noise. It screeched and screamed as metal clashed against metal, writhing on the ground as it tore through the trees.

He almost wished Toph had joined him, no doubt able to make light work of the machine if only she’d had the energy.

Zuko sprinted, weaving in and out of the trees and carnage, and skidded to a halt at the very end of the drill, hands digging into the dirt as he slowed down. Behind the drill were mounds of broken wood, all connected and dry. Perfect.

He breathed in as deeply as humanly possible and, with his forceful exhale, summoned fire directly from his centre; his rage at the Fire Nation, his disgust at the damage caused in the chase of children after children, and his fury of the Fire Princess- and everything it did to his little sister.

The fire roared into life, quickly spreading from kinder to kinder, but it wouldn’t be enough. He threw himself into a run once more, the fire whirling up into the air and following hot on his heels, spreading through all of the unearthed trees on both sides of the drill. He looked up, the bison was far enough into the air by then.

His knees bent, body dipped down into a crouch, and pushed with whatever strength he had left to launch into the sky, fire in pursuit. Like a firework, he flew, flames blowing chunks of wood into the air to bounce off of the top of the drill, now slowing to a halt due to a fiery blockade.

Zuko landed nearly flat on his face but had no time to wince over his scrapes, afresh in his run towards his friends. Something shifted behind him, the familiar sound of metal against metal, but he didn’t falter or look back. He was on a strict deadline, lest he be left behind.

Someone shouted, he wasn’t sure who or from where, and the voices around him grew distant as he disappeared into the shadows cast by thick foliage above, stray streaks of early morning sunlight dotting across his path forward.

If he was lucky, which he rarely was, the fire would be enough of a problem that the time it took to start that drill again would gain the group a head start.

The edge of the earth was in sight, Appa just above it, flying low. Zuko sped up and, again, sent himself into the air with a burst of fire behind him. Alas, it wouldn’t be enough, as he felt a wave of dizziness pass over him. His exhaustion had caught up.

Hand reached out for the saddle, he shut his eyes as he prepared for the fall, hoping he’d land on the cliff instead of over the side.

No fall came, instead two hands grabbed his arm in a bruising hold, tugging him over the side and onto his saviour. The hands grabbed the back of his head, holding him down, and a voice below him cursed colourfully.

“Sokka!”

“Ack- sorry Aang!” The hands loosened the ribbon on the back of his head and his mask stayed on the persons chest as his head itself raised, meeting Sokka’s weak glare “Don’t you dare do that again.”

Arms on either side of Sokka’s torso, Zuko pushed himself up and onto his knees, sitting back on his heels. The rest of the saddle was deadly quiet.

“You didn’t mention you were a firebender, Lee.” Katara mumbled, staring at him. Her shoulders were tense, yet her gaze soft and conflicted.

“No, I did not.” Zuko agreed quietly, looking from passenger to passenger “I apologise.”

“Eh, if you hadn’t been I think that diversion would have gone a lot worse.” Sokka chuckled awkwardly, his face tinted red, still lying flat on the saddle floor.

-

At the mouth of the tent, canvas doors drifting back and forth in the breeze, was a young man. He was taller than most at the campsite, with a long face and strange eyebrows that sort of ticked up at the corners. His skin was tanned and hair a dark brown tied up neatly at the back, complimented by his dark green and gold clothing. Adeen was a newer recruit, one of the youngest, and had been stationed in an Earth Kingdom city.

He bowed deeply and looked to the ground in respect as he addressed the tents owner “General, I bring news.”

The man chuckled, lowering his cup to the table, and gestured for the young boy to join him “Please, I have not been a General in many years. Join me, we may talk over tea.”

Taken aback, the boy hesitated before doing as he was told, sitting awkwardly on the ground, his back straight in perfect posture “Sir, for the last few weeks I’ve been traversing the larger cities of the Earth Kingdom. Most recently, I stayed within the walls of Gaoling, posed as a merchant.”

“I see.” Iroh nodded along, pouring the boy a cup of his Jasmine tea, pushing the handle-less cup across the table to him “A beautiful city indeed, Gaoling, though I imagine it is much different than I remember it.” He smiled softly.

“Sir,” The boy hesitated “The Avatar resided there for a short two days before leaving, two new members added to his party.”

“Hmm,” He nodded and took another sip of tea “Those being?”

“Well, the girl is a member of the Beifong family, the only daughter in fact, though it is not well known. She is blind, you see.”

“Her name?”

“Toph Beifong, sir.”

“A talented young lady, then, if she travels with the Avatar.” Iroh pushed the other cup closer to the boy, where it remained untouched “And the others?”

“There was a boy, the Blue Spirit, who was sighted within Gaoling for a few months sporadically. He carried the girl there.”

“They must be close, no doubt. Do we know his name?”

“That’s the thing sir, it’s why I came directly to you.” He shifted on the floor, hands falling to his lap where they linked fingers, never remaining still for a moment.

“Please, speak freely.”

“I was following the Avatar, in case my assistance was needed, when they arrived. The boy, he removed his mask and I managed to glimpse his face. He is Fire Nation, no doubt, and… it’s most unusual, he has a large scar across his face.”

Fingertips stilled on the cup; the gentle rhythmic taps gone “Describe him.”

“One of his eyes was almost fused shut- gold eyes, that is- and the scarring seems to be from burning, it covers the left half of his face. He introduced himself as Lee.” The boy took a deep breath, finally accepting the tea to calm himself “Sir, forgive me for saying, but I believe he is the missing Prince Zuko, though I haven’t the faintest idea as to how.”

Chapter Text

Toph was a child. Sometimes she herself forgot that, between dealing with her parents, the underground fights, and her current escape-to-fight-a-war-with-a-hundred-year-old-child thing that was going on.

In the moments she sat by Zuko, as he was on the brink of another breakdown, she didn’t feel like her age. At the ripe old age of twelve, she felt like an old woman. Not that she blamed Zuko, no, of course not. She loved the idiot to death and wasn’t sure what she’d be doing with her life without her kind-of-brother. It’s not like their relationship was one way either, she’d spent her own time crying to him as he rocked her back and forth in the depths of a cave or on cold to the touch rooftiles.

If she was an old woman, then he must be a pile of ash and bones.

When morning broke, they washed away the weariness weighing down their limbs in a river.

Zuko was floating on his back, well aware of Toph dipping up and down in the waters, giggling away to herself, pretending to be a shark. She’d wait for the right moment, dive down to the bottom of the water and with one foot pressed into the dirt, narrow him down in the ripples of the water. Then, she’d shoot up and stretch out her arms to grab him.

Their game of cat-and-mouse (or boy-and-shark) went on until the others awoke. Katara was the first to find them and Zuko could see out of the corner of his eye as she shook her head, smiling, and sat on the river bank to watch them. Her brother had no such restraint and dived straight in, spitting up water into the air like a fountain.

With a new target, Toph decided to give Zuko a break and slunk back under the surface to torture Sokka. He watched them for a while, laughing as Sokka squawked when he was ambushed, his legs flailing in the air as tiny hands dragged him under. He could hear Katara chuckling too and turned to look at her.

“Are you not coming in?” He pushed his hair, loose from its phoenix tail, out of his face.

She shrugged, eyes watching her brother as he scrambled up to the surface, arms from Toph wrapped around his neck “Maybe in a bit, I’ll stay here to keep an eye out.”

Zuko nodded. With Toph bullying Sokka and away from the earth, she probably wouldn’t notice the drill closing in any faster than the rest of them so someone would have to stay vigilant “Where’s Aang?”

“Still sleeping,” She rubbed at her eyes, doing nothing to lessen the bags underneath them “I thought I should give him and Appa a bit longer, before I start breakfast.”

“Would you like any help?”

She stared at him, not unkindly “Uh… sure.” Shifting her legs closer to her chest, her gaze flickered between the grass and him.

“Are you alright?”

“Yesterday, you-” Katara sighed and rested her chin on her knee “You never told us you were a firebender.”

“If I had, would you have let me join you?”

“No- yes, I don’t know.” Her eyes closed and she let out a longer and shakier sigh “I just… it’s a lot.”

A part of him, pushed deep down and chastised by the rest, wanted to stick its nose up indignantly and call her all sorts. That part was thirteen and still a child; forever part of him and yet nothing like him at all.

“If it’s any help, I have no allegiance to the Fire Lord.”

“But you do to the Nation?”

“They are people,” He said softly, wishing he had the energy to snap his words “Who shouldn’t be held responsible for the crimes of their government. I won’t claim all are innocent, some soldiers took very little persuading when the orders were sent, but they are still my people.”

Katara winced “That’s the hard bit, I suppose. My mother was killed by those soldiers, died protecting me, and once the grief left, I’ve had this anger boiling away inside of me.”

“The grief never leaves,” He mumbled “It changes shape, much as mine for my own mother.”

“How did she die?”

“The Fire Lord.”

It was hardly all forgiven, neither a truce, but an understanding passed between the two children. They had both been burned and scalded by the same soldiers and uniform. They were angry and tired of it.

-

Once he was alone, tent flaps shut, Iroh allowed himself to unravel his hurricane of emotions. His nephew, his boy, was alive and seemingly flourishing in the Earth Kingdom. His Zuko, alive and well. Iroh held his face in his hands. He’d survived those past years and yet he’d been none the wiser, he’d abandoned him. How quick he was to accept his murder, he swore under his breath, perhaps his old age was beginning to show more than he thought.

Engrossed in his thoughts, only when the man placed a hand on his shoulder did he realise another elder of the White Lotus had entered his tent. Kulay-abo stood tall above him, an unreadable expression upon his face.

“Iroh,” His voice was deep and scratchy; many had joked it was from his reluctance to use it “If the Prince is still alive, we will retrieve him.”

“Adeen said he was travelling with the Avatar, if that is where the Spirits have guided him who are we to disrupt their will.” Iroh smiled and released a sigh, his hand coming up to gratefully pat Kulay-abos’ “That being said, we may be able to intercept their path. Are we aware of their location?”

“After departing Gaoling our sources reported them being chased by a mechanical drill, directed by the Crown Princess Azula.”

“Oh you silly child,” Iroh mumbled under his breath “I will go to Omashu, perhaps I may be able to intercept them from there.”

“You will take sufficient protection.”

“I am not decrepit quite yet,” Iroh scoffed, waving the man off “and my nephew is no criminal.”

-

The Blue Spirit mask was tied securely around Zukos head as the group hurriedly packed their things. There was shouting in the background, between Katara and Toph- something about Appas fur, but he wasn’t listening and his eyes stayed firmly on the glint of metal growing closer from the distance. It was getting louder, too, and Katara cut off whatever she had been saying before to curse loudly, stamping her foot and entirely at her wits end.

“Hey.”

“Sorry Aang,” She mumbled, throwing the nearest bag up for her brother to grab. They were ready to go at any moment, if Appa could muster the energy “They’re so close.” Katara covered her face with her hands, barely holding back the tears of frustration.

Zuko shifted his stance, hands reaching to his back where his Dao were secured.

Toph stiffened upon noticing his change “Lee, don’t.”

“I’ll meet you in the nearest village, it’ll be fine. You have my word.”

“Oh, uh-uh.” Sokka placed his hands on his hips, looking down at them from atop the saddle, and scrambled down. He stormed over to Zuko “You are not doing this disappearing act again, not after last time. No, if you’re running off, I’m going with you.” As if to prove his stubbornness, he grabbed onto his sleeve tightly.

“Sokka-”

“Aang, get a head start, we’ll hold them up for as long as we can. There’s a river ahead of us, take Appa there and wash him off, just in case it is the fur. There should be a waterfall too, hide there and we’ll come find you.”

Though conflicted, Aang nodded meekly and settled at Appas head to take the reins. Katara, lifting up Toph to help her to the saddle, sent the two a look and a nod before they took off, leaving just Sokka, Zuko, and a charred campfire in the clearing.

The two did not waste a second, dashing directly towards the danger, feet flying so fast with each step they barely touched the ground.

“What’s the plan?” Sokka shouted, dodging trees with surprising grace.

“I’ll face them and draw them away, you damage the drill as much as you can.” Zuko yelled back.

Sokka nodded and slowed his pace as the metal drill became clearer, sneaking off to find a better advantage, while Zuko leaped into a nearby tree. The drill slowed in its approach until the metal creaked to a halt, the front not too far from his hiding place. A hatch in the side opened and three oversized lizards crawled out, each with a figure on its back.

The one at the front stopped and sniffed at some strands of white fur on the ground (it would have nicer to have been proved right under different circumstances). Zuko held his breath and ducked lower into his crouch on the branch, peeking between leaves to find the riders face. They had turned, facing their allies, and all he could make out was dark hair tied up into a large bun, along with deep red robes. Not a soldier, but a threat regardless.

He leaned closer, only to hear a small creak in the branch with his shift in weight. The front rider whipped their head around, staring directly at him, and he only had half a second of shock at a familiar face before a dagger was thrown at his head. He darted back, almost falling from the tree entirely, but managed to hold on to the branch below.

“Azula,” Mai growled, her eyes not moving from the painted mask “We have company.” Her arm moved for another dagger at her hip.

Zuko dropped from the tree, missing a wave of fire from his sister that caught the dry bark instead, and rolled forward, Dao drawn.

The first to move forward was Ty Lee, who vaulted themselves from their lizard and aimed chi-blocking punches at his torso. Missing him by less than an inch, Zuko ducked and swung his body to swipe at her legs. As if it were more natural than breathing, she flipped out of reach and stepped out of Mai’s way.

He weaved his way between each projectile, coming from a seemingly endless supply, while Ty Lee jumped in and out with well-aimed jabs. Neither side landed a hit, instead deflecting, as if they were sparring. That was until Zuko, weakened by a more severe lack of sleep than usual, wobbled. A dagger sunk into his shoulder and Ty Lee seized her chance, chopping the back of his neck. Zuko dropped to his knees in pain, shuddering as he felt his inner flame froze. He tried to raise his swords but they were kicked from his grasp.

No longer sitting back out of curiosity, Azula slid down from her lizard, holding a hand to stop her friends attacking “Well, well, it seems we have the attention of the famous Blue Spirit.” She cackled to herself, striding forward to the unarmed vigilante “Here I was thinking you knew better than to interfere with matters of the crown. Your insolence has proved me wrong.”

She crouched until their eyes were level “What?” Azula cooed “Nothing to say?”

She titled her head when yet again she was met would no response. Slowly, she raised her hand and reached out to untie the masks ribbons. Whether from fear or exhaustion, he didn't move or fight back.

“Hey!”

A boomerang thunked into the back of Azula’s skull and, as her friends shot forward to help her, Zuko scooped up both of his swords and forced himself to stand. When he was about to run, the ground beneath his feet shifted, and he flew up into the air as the solid dirt carried him to Sokka and Toph, making an earth wall as it moved.

Before he landed, Sokka reached out to steady him, sending a worrying glance at the dagger still firmly stuck in his shoulder “Hey, d’you think you can run?”

Woozy from the chi-block, he shook his head.

Sokka bit his returned-boomerang between his teeth. He grabbed Zukos arm and slung it around his shoulders, grabbing onto his wrist on the other side, hoisting him up to his feet. The two swayed slightly, but remained upright. Sokka began to bring the two of them further away from the fighting as his sister and Aang flew past (the latter more literally).

A bolt of lightning broke through the wall Toph had thrown up, paired with an angered yell from Azula "How dare y-"

Toph jumped into a stance and thrust a fist forward, tossing a large rock straight into the face of the furious royal. She snickered and returned to the original kata, one arm tucked to her side and the other pushed forward, prepared.

Mai surged forward as Ty Lee rushed to Azula's side, helping her friend back to her feet. She was batted away without thanks as Azula whirled around to snarl at the young earthbender, lighting crackling dangerously at her fingertips.

Aang, sat on a ball of air, rocketed past Toph and clapped his hands together. A shocking blast of air threw them off while Katara ripped open the bag hanging at her waist, water circulating around her, forming a whip. She cracked it in a warning at Mai, who had begun to sneak forward again.

"You deal with the brats, the 'spirit' and Avatar are mine." Azula hissed and sent her friends away.

Sokka bit back a curse strong enough that Katara would have stopped the battle to wash his mouth out with soap "Sorry about this." He smiled sheepishly at Zuko, who was returning his Dao to their holders.

"Huh? Wha-"

He swiftly picked up Zuko behind the knees and sprinted in the opposite direction of the drill "Appa must be close by, if we can get there and put some height between us and Princess fire-crazy we should-"

Zuko wriggled in the hold and forced Sokka to stop so that he could stand by himself "No. You go to Appa, bring him closer and go to Katara and Toph first. Their main focus is Aang and I, if they find me, they might let you go."

“Are you crazy?” He hissed, squeezing

"But-"

A near-silent set of footsteps behind them turned up the heat on the decision making. Zuko pushed Sokka, perhaps harsher than he'd intended, away from the oncoming fight "Go!" He could have thanked the spirit world if he had the time, as the Water Tribe boy finally got the message and disappeared into the remains of the forest. He drew his Dao once more and spun to meet the eyes of Azula. He grimaced, it seemed she wasn't content with letting her new mystery make their escape. He'd been so sure she would be focussed on Aang.

"You should have run with him," She laughed, her arms open wide and mocking "You're missing your bending, and you are far too unskilled with those toothpicks of yours to defeat me."

He bit his lip and lowered into a stance, swords raised.

Chapter Text

Azula lunged forward, flames curling up her arms, from her fists to her shoulders. Azula threw a punch, aiming for his head, but Zuko was prepared. He rolled out of her line of fire (no pun intended) and darted out behind her. As she skidded to a halt and whirled around to face him, he kicked the back of her legs and tried to jab the hilt of his sword into the space between her neck and shoulders.

He missed his mark but the Spirits must have taken pity on him, as when Azula darted to the right, he just about managed to hit the end of her shoulders. The flames in her left side wavered, growing a little smaller, though not for long. Her fire- if anything- doubled and her eyes sparked with malice.

In a flurry of arms and flames, Zuko did his best to fend his sister off but there was a steadily growing ache in his limbs and they ached with each movement. With a sharp blow to the chest, he was sent flying backwards and slammed into a tree, dropping his swords with a clang as they skittered from his reach. He coughed, the air in his lungs forced out in one violent slam, and groaned in pain. He attempted to rise back to his feet only for his legs to fail beneath him and fall back to the ground with a winded huff.

“Aw,” Azula cooed mockingly, looking down upon him and shaking her head “Tired? We’ve only just started.”

She struck a hand out and a ball of fire hurtled towards his face. Barely in time, he scrambled up and used whatever strength was left in his legs to launch himself to the side, a woosh of hot air passing by the back of his head as the fire thudded into the tree, dry wood catching alight.

Azula stalked towards him, picking up on of the Dao blades as she approached, and playfully spun it once in her grip. When Zuko rolled onto his back, the end of the sword was eye level and for the briefest moment he was certain it would find its purchase between his eyes. However, his assumption was wrong, and the sword slowly drifted down to cut at the straps of his mask and poke it aside onto the grass.

He shut his eyes, waiting for the next blow. Perhaps she’d match the right side of his face with the left.

“Zu-Zu?” Her voice wavered as she whispered out his name.

Hesitantly, he peeled open his eyes and watched in confusion as she dropped to her knees beside him, the sword dropped onto the ground. There were tears starting to grow in the corner of her eyes, a sight unfamiliar.

Moving slowly, both due to the pain and genuine fear that this was all some act to bring his guard down, he pushed himself to sit up “Hey, ‘Zula.” Zuko mumbled.

"You died." She shook her head and leaned back "On your banishment, you jumped from the ship."

"I never jumped. I was thrown.” He gingerly reached to touch her arm. For a second, his fingertips brushed against her sleeve, but the moment he felt her arm underneath she jumped up to her feet.

“Stop lying.”

Using his sword, stabbing it into the ground, Zuko forced himself up and raised his free hand in surrender “We both know I’m not. You always could see through me, Azula.”

She shoved him, hands hitting him worryingly close to his throat, and clenched her hands into fists so tightly her nails were surely digging into her palms "You lie! Father told me you jumped from the dishonour of what you did. You opposed the Fire Lord, you still do, seeing as you’ve sided with the Avatar." She snarled and the air pressure around them raised, a sharp light crackling around her hands.

"Azula-"

"Hey!"

A jet of water shot across the forest and took Azula with it, far off into the trees.

Sokka was the first one to reach him, Katara close behind "Run!" He grabbed Zuko’s hand and faltered in his pace when he stumbled and dropped to the ground.

Zuko looked up at him, squinting at his face, and recognising a look in his eye with horror “Don’t you dare-” For the second time that day, Sokka lifted him up into his arms and booked it.

Appa wasn’t stationed too far away, Aang already settled into the reins with Toph up on the saddle. The earth beneath their feet lifted and the fleeing trio were thrown up to join her. In no time they were back in the air, heading for the water fall.

Spots danced across Zuko’s eyes and, as his head rolled limp onto Sokkas shoulder, felt himself drift away into unconsciousness. Arms tightened around him.

-

The echoes of laughter and splashing of water bounced across the stone walls of the cave. There was a flickering of sunlight and it rippled through the flow of running water covering the entrance. Laying upon his bedroll, Zuko could feel a hand in his hair, braiding a small strand slowly, only to unravel and start again. He sighed and leaned into the touch, only for the moving hands to still, caught in the act.

“I know you’re awake, hotshot.” The person chuckled above him, Zuko’s pillow moving as he laughed. Oh, not a pillow then, instead someone’s lap.

He cracked open his good eye to peer up his human-pillow. Sokka grinned back down at him, upside down from Zuko’s view, and brushed a few stray hairs from his face. His body blocked the light, casting Zuko in his shadow.

“Hm.” He searched the cave. It was hardly a large space, yet none of their friends were in sight “Where are the others?”

“What, I’m not good enough company?” Sokka joked, raising an eyebrow to tease him “Aang took some of Appa’s fur and made a false trail away from us. He’s back now, helping Katara wash the rest of Appa’s shedding off outside.”

“Hm.”

“Hey,” Sokka cupped the side of his face, his thumb brushing fondly over his cheekbone “Do not ever tell me to leave you behind again, do you hear me?”

“She wasn’t going to hurt you-”

“Bullshit. She has before and she will again, besides,” Sokka leaned closer “I wasn’t worried about myself.”

“I’m fine.” Zuko whispered, meeting his eyes, and resisted the urge to squirm at the unfiltered, unbridled affection staring back at him. He tried to turn his head but Sokkas hand guided him back to face him.

“If you were fine, I wouldn’t have had to carry you here, dumbass.” The insult held no anger and, if anything, came out more as an endearment “Next time, either you run with me or I’ll stay to fight by your side. You don’t have to do this alone.”

With bravery he didn’t know he possessed, Zuko lifted a hand to guide Sokka’s head lower, stretching his neck up to meet him and press their lips together in a firm kiss. It didn’t last long, likely due to their awkward angle, and Sokka was the one to pull away first.

The apology growing in Zuko’s mouth died halfway when Sokka just smiled- that smile, no wonder the poets wrote so often of love- at him. His fingers brushed against Zuko’s face, brushing oh so gently across his marred skin with such care. Never before had he been content simply to stare. He shifted until he was sat up, hand returning to the back of Sokkas head, and leaned in again.

The laughter drifted back into the cave as Toph pounced on Katara, dragging her under water with the strength of all of her body weight, going completely unnoticed.

-

Sitting cross-legged upon a rock, hiding from Tophs underwater shark-tendencies, Aang watched the clumps of white fur float further downstream. He had long given up on meditating, Katara and Toph squabble being far too funny to ignore, but was still sat with his back straight and his hands resting on either knee.

There was an itch of guilt, scratching away at his lungs. He’d been so insistent that it wasn’t Appa’s fault Azula and her crew were so close on their tail, fighting with anyone who dared even mention it. It was hard to pass that off as simply ‘being tired’. He yawned.

Katara, wading into shallow waters with a whip of water holding a struggling Toph in place, brought up her hands to twist the water from her loose hair. She smiled up at Aang, who just about managed a weary smile back.

“Tired?”

Aang hummed and nodded his head slowly.

“You should probably catch some sleep, maybe set up a bed roll next to Lee?”

He pouted “But what if-”

“Aang.” Katara warned him, hands planting on her hips in her take-no-shit stance “Azula is off chasing a false lead and by the time she realised, we will be long gone. However, we wont be able to get away if our pilot is struggling to stay awake.”

“It was my fault. I didn’t want to listen to you and got it all wrong.”

“Aang, no one here blames you. Appa moulting isn’t your fault, Azula having freaky lizards isn’t your fault, and your getting frustrated- while it was a bit mean- isn’t entirely your fault. You are tired, we all are, and you’ve already apologised.” Katara climbed up the rock and pulled Aang to her side in a loose hug.

“I am sorry, Katara.”

“I know, and you’re forgiven- always.” She rested her head on top of his and squeezed his shoulder “Go have a nap, I’ll stay out here and wrangle Toph until Lee wakes up.”

Aang giggled “She bites.”

“Spirits knows how Lee isn’t missing a leg by now.” Katara chuckled and playfully shoved Aang in the direction of the waterfall “Sleep well, Aang.”

He rubbed at his eyes with the back of his thumb, waved goodbye to Katara (who had dived back into the water after a released Toph) and shuffled towards the cave opening. Aang slid past the falling water, stretching out his arms as he ventured further into the cave “Hey Sokka, can you see my bed-”

Sokka, half on top of Lee with his hands tangled in long black hair, shot back and looked at Aang with wide eyes “Um.”

Aang froze mid-stretch and stared at the two boys for a solid minute before squeaking and running straight out of the cave to sleep in a tree.

-

They regrouped in the area around the outer front of the Drill, the lizards having been sent back to their stables. Mai had spent a little extra time outside, collecting a few stray knives from the bark of the trees, Ty Lee 'helping' her. Albeit, her idea of helping was practicing her acrobatics, climbing up trees with unnecessary flourishes to grab the higher blades. Mai had been tempted to send her friend back inside.

Azula watched them. She leaned against her Drill, arms crossed, with her mind miles away (in a bedroom in the Fire Palace, under sheets, crying with an emotionless letter crumbled up in her hands). Upon returning from the woods, she hadn’t spoken a single word or spared her friends so much as a second thought. Ty Lees giggles grated on her nerves and she marched back into the Drill by herself, heading directly to her quarters.

As it was required of her, she pulled out her writing set and began her report of the incident.

She detailed the last few days of her journey, keeping it short and plain. At the end, she noted the slight incursion with the Avatar and his entourage, relaying that the Blue Spirit and the supposed 'kidnapped' noble earth girl had indeed joined them. When she moved her brush back to the ink, she hesitated.

It was her duty to tell her father everything, especially what might be considered a threat to their throne, but as much as her mind commanded her hand to move, she found herself unable to write Zuko's name. Hand shaking, she placed the brush on the table next to the ink pot.

She was the only one to see his face, to know who the Blue Spirit was. It would be impossible for the Avatar to accept the Prince of the Fire Nation, traitor or not, into his little group. To claim such a thing would be preposterous.

The dead do not fight alongside legends, they rot in the ground or sink to the bottom of an unforgiving ocean.

Azula paused long enough for the ink on the page to dry. She rolled up the report, sealing it with a wax stamp, and headed to the Aviary.

Chapter Text

The road had never seemed so long, despite it being behind him.

On the back of a wooden cart, a farmer’s cart that he had been allowed to ride on the back of until the next village, Iroh travelled alone as he had done for the past few years. He had little to his name, mostly the clothes on his back, a bindle of food and tea supplies, while at his waist was a belt with a small leather pouch. It held two items; a white lotus playing piece and a small golden crown. The crown wasn’t his own, he’d given that up long ago, in fact it should have been returned to the Fire Nation upon his nephew’s death.

There was no real use to keeping it, other than to reach into the pouch and brush his fingertips over the cool metal, to trace the corners and sharp edges. It was torture to remember how he’d adjusted it on that boy’s head, the same for his sister with hers, after they’d chased each other around the garden and made their clothes a mess. How he’d placed it gently on a bedside table while a child, bandaged and softly breathing, slept beside it.

He sighed and looked down. His feet hung over the edge of the cart and Iroh’s legs were just short enough that they didn’t drag on the uneven road as it passed below. His age was unfortunately catching up with him, faster than he could outrun. He had left the white lotus camp alone, despite his allies protests, to restart the search for his nephew. A fruitless one, he had been told many a time, with no end.

That didn’t stop him. It could never. He would be dead on the side of the road, buried in a pauper’s grave, before he allowed Zuko to go unsearched for, to let his memory go passing into the night. Especially now when he had hope that the boy was alive.

Iroh retrieved the waterskin from his side and took a long swig, drinking up the last few drops. His old hands, lined with so many wrinkles and marks he could barely recognise them, fumbled to fasten its cap as he swayed from side to side with the rhythm of the cart’s struggles.

Eventually, after most his food had been eaten and the sun had ducked behind the treeline, the cart rolled to a stop and he bid the kind-souled farmer farewell. He walked, slow-paced, down the trodden path and followed the warm glowing lights of the village ahead. They shone like stars, plucked from the sky to be caught in a lantern, and Iroh allowed the largest- light from an entire building with many voices from within- to guide him.

He pushed the door open and stepped into the inn, swiftly weaving in between the crowded tables and stumbling people. Upon reaching the counter, he placed a handful of coins before the woman standing behind it.

“A room please, my dear, just for the night.” His stomach churned with hunger “And perhaps a hot meal if I may.”

“Of course.” She nodded, sliding the coins across the wooden counter top as she counted the sum. The woman reached behind her to a cupboard and handed Iroh a small bronze key from within “Up the stairs, on your left.”

“Thank you.” He lowered himself in a slight bow and headed towards his room.

It was when his hand was pressed against the rail and his foot was raised to take the first step up the stairs that his eyes caught on a familiar game, set up on a small table in the corner of the room. He tucked the key in his pouch and changed direction.

He sat at the board and smiled at the lone player, who had been hunched over in thought, pondering his next move. As he’d thought them to be, it was a familiar face.

“Pai Sho is a game meant for two, my friend. Might I join you?”

The man nodded and gestured for Iroh to play. Iroh leaned forward and hummed in thought as he peered at all the pieces, noting one crucial missing piece. From his pouch, he took out his own white lotus piece and placed it on the board. His Pai Sho partner nodded and did the same, drawing an identical piece.

The man met Iroh’s gaze and frowned.

“There is much to discuss.”

-

After the shock of Aang running in wore off, Sokka chuckled and dropped his head down to hide his face in the crook of Zuko’s neck. He pulled Zuko closer to him, cuddling him closer, and rubbed comforting circles into his back. At the interruption, Zuko had frozen in fear and barely moved, but in Sokkas arms he melted into the touch and took deep steadying breaths.

“Well.” Sokka tried to supress his grin “That could have gone better.”

“It couldn’t have gone any worse.” Zuko groaned and moved to hide his face in Sokkas hair.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Sokka placed a light kiss on his neck “Before Aang walked in, I’d say it was going quite well.”

Zuko jabbed him in the side and managed a smile as Sokka overdramatically fell to the ground, clutching his side in ‘utter agony’.

“You hath wounded me good sir, betrayal!” Sokka pointed at him accusingly- rather ineffective seeing as he couldn’t stop laughing with a cheesy grin wide on his face.

“How ever will you forgive me?” Zuko asked, deadpan.

Sokka stuck his arms up, reminiscing of Toph whenever she demanded to be carried, and wiggled his fingers about.

“On the other hand, forgiveness is overrated.” Zuko stood shakily and dusted off his clothing. He looked down at Sokka, who had not moved an inch “Fine.”

He dragged Sokka up to his feet who, the moment he was stood up straight, swooped in to kiss Zuko again “You’re forgiven.”

-

“Princess Azula has continued her chase of the Avatar.”

Iroh sighed and tapped his fingers against the wooden board “I offered her my assistance and company on her travels, it was not accepted. I believe her two friends are with her.” He moved a game piece “Sweet children, as I remember them. They will steer her well.”

“Children grow up, Iroh.” The man deepened his frown and stared hard at his old friend “They might not be as you remember. Your niece, too.” He moved one of his pieces forward, taking one of Iroh’s

“If I knew she would allow me to guide her, I would be by her side.” He leaned back and studied the board carefully. It had been some time since Iroh had played, he was getting rusty “How is the Avatar?”

“He travels with two children from the Water Tribe and recently kidnapped a young noble girl from the Earth Kingdom, alongside the Blue Spirit.”

“Curious figure, that Blue Spirit.” Iroh hummed and hesitated before making his next move “What is known about him?”

“Very little. Rumours about him come from across the Earth Kingdom. There are theories of course, as to who he is, but I have yet to see any proof.” He glanced at Iroh, apprehensive to elaborate further.

“I see.” The old man stifled a yawn and placed another of his pieces on the board “A brave one, this Spirit, to join the Avatar.”

“Few find themselves able to not join the war effort, now the saviour has returned.” The man’s words were harsh and aimed directly for Iroh, who disguised his reaction well “Our mutual friends have made moves to protect him in his travels. I will join them soon. You could come with me.”

“I am very old, my dear friend, and tired of fighting in wars.”

“You are scared.” The man spat out and claimed another of Iroh’s pieces “The loss of your nephew was tragic, yes, but no more than the children dying in the Earth Kingdom following Fire Nation aggressions. No more than the countless kidnapped Water Tribe people. The only difference is that these people are still alive, for now at least.”

Iroh didn’t respond.

“It’s time to stop chasing a ghost, friend.”

The game continued in silence until the man won. He’d extended his hand and Iroh had amicably shaken it, the two exchanging a polite nod. The inn was mostly empty by that time and the lanterns were burning low. Iroh excused himself, pocketing his white lotus tile, and slowly made his way up the stairs to his room. The next day, the two men parted ways; the stranger to the north, where a gathering of white lotus members would greet him, and Iroh further to the south.