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“Janus?”
When Janus startled and almost dropped the glass of water he was holding, Patton frowned and entered the kitchen. As he approached Janus, the deceitful Side placed his glass of water on the bench and turned around to face his company.
“Patton,” Janus greeted, fixing his capelet nonchalantly.
“What’re you doing?”
“I could ask you the same question.”
Janus’ defensiveness was an immediate red flag for Patton. Something was up.
“Is something… wrong?”
“No,” Janus responded, much too quickly for the statement to be true.
Patton’s expression softened. “Is it something to do with the wedding?”
Janus opened his mouth to say, “No, that’s preposterous,” but the words caught in his throat as he realised that was exactly what was bothering him.
His silence was enough of an answer for Patton.
“Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I can’t stop thinking about it either.”
“No. Really? I hadn’t noticed.”
Patton laughed halfheartedly, but Janus could see the way the light seemed to drain from his eyes.
“Well, if you were confronted by questions you didn’t know the answers to, I doubt you’d be able to stop thinking about it either.”
Janus nodded. “Fair enough. Oh, and don’t forget the part where you turned into a giant frog monster.”
Patton sighed and took a seat at the table. “Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten.”
Janus bit his lip. Had that been too harsh?
“Sorry, I didn’t mean--”
“It’s fine.”
It wasn’t.
Janus slid into the chair beside Patton’s.
“Janus?”
“Hmm?”
“I…” Patton swallowed. “I don’t think I’m okay.”
Janus’ hand slowly made its way up towards Patton’s shoulder, but stopped short. Would the touch be considered comforting? Or would Patton avoid it?
Janus steeled himself and took a chance. He knew he had made the right choice when Patton leaned into the touch, albeit very subtly.
“It’s okay to not be okay, Patton. Taking into consideration everything everyone’s been through recently, I’d be much more surprised if you said you were fine and meant it.”
Patton bit his lip, and Janus gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze. After a moment, Patton turned his head, and he and Janus locked eyes.
“You’re not okay either, Janus. I know guilt when I see it.”
Janus averted his gaze and removed his hand from Patton’s shoulder. “Yes, well… god, I say some stupid things sometimes.”
Patton frowned and his brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”
“I mean I called Roman evil! I overreacted, just because he mocked me in front of you and Thomas.”
Patton nodded understandingly. “Yeah, that probably wasn’t the best thing to say at that moment, but it’s understandable. Roman was being kinda mean.”
“Didn’t give me the right to compare him to the brother he despises.”
Patton smiled and placed a hand on Janus’ shoulder. Janus glanced in Patton’s direction, but wouldn’t meet his eyes. “You make a fair point, and the fact that you’re admitting your actions were wrong is proof that you’re willing to do better. In my books, that makes you a pretty darn good guy, Janus.”
Janus’ eyes widened and, in his shock, he locked eyes with Patton once again. Patton grinned, and in that moment, Janus dared to hope.