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Jiang Cheng is really not sure how he ended up accompanying Wei Wuxian to dinner with his boyfriend but here he is.
“Tell me again why I need to be here?” Jiang Cheng asks, even though the four previous times didn’t make it any clearer to him at all and he doesn’t have much hope for the fifth time either.
“Because Lan Zhan’s brother will be there too, we can’t very well kick him out of the house after all, and that would just be awkward, but with you there it will be fine, because you can distract him, can’t you, A-Cheng?” Wei Wuxian rambles and reminds Jiang Cheng yet again that he is quite nervous about this.
“Doesn’t the guy have any other friends he could go to?” Jiang Cheng grumbles under his breath because he was looking forward to a relaxing evening, goddamit, but now he’s in the rich part of town and has to make small talk over a dinner he doesn’t care about.
Sometimes he really hates Wei Wuxian.
“He studied abroad for a long while and just came back, I’m not sure he had time to see his friends already,” Wei Wuxian says as he bounces excitedly on his feet.
“That just makes it worse,” Jiang Cheng gives back with an eyeroll. “Shouldn’t he get to spend some time with his brother first, before you barge in?”
“I said so, too, but Lan Zhan seems worried about his brother. He says he’s a little subdued ever since he came back and we can’t have that now, can we?” Wei Wuxian tells him with his most winning smile and Jiang Cheng fights the urge to punch him in the face.
“You could have brought Huaisang,” Jiang Cheng argues. “Hell, you could have brought A-jie, and it would have been better than dragging me along to this.”
“But not half as fun,” Wei Wuxian singsongs back at him, and before Jiang Cheng can reach out to strangle him, he rings at a door.
“This is not over,” Jiang Cheng hisses, just as the door is opened, because he will not forget this, and just because basic manners demand that he can’t strangle his brother right in front of the boyfriend and his brother doesn’t mean he has to completely let go of that urge.
There will be a chance at a later date, Jiang Cheng is sure of that.
But for now he plasters a smile to his face as he directs his attention towards the door, ready to meet Wei Wuxian’s boyfriend and at least play nice for today.
When he catches sight of the person on the other side of the door the smile slides right off his face though.
“Xichen,” Jiang Cheng gets out, his voice strangled and he watches as Lan Xichen’s mouth drops open.
“Wanyin?” he asks, clearly unsure and it’s enough to jolt Jiang Cheng out of his surprise.
“What the—” Wei Wuxian starts, but Jiang Cheng doesn’t hear how that ends, because he turns around on his heels and walks away.
His heart is racing and his breath is coming much quicker than it should be, so that means he probably shouldn’t run, but he needs to get away from Lan Xichen immediately.
He cannot believe that they would run into each other like that.
Forgetting Lan Xichen the first time had been hell, and to have him suddenly pop up in his life like this is throwing Jiang Cheng off.
“Fuck,” he mutters, still basically running away from Wei Wuxian and Lan Xichen. “Fuck,” he says with more vehemence when it registers that Lan Xichen must be Lan Zhan’s brother, meaning that there is no way of escaping him, not if Lan Zhan’s and Wei Wuxian’s relationship works out.
Which it seems to be doing so far, judging from the sickeningly sweet way Wei Wuxian tends to talk about Lan Zhan.
“Hey, asshole,” Wei Wuxian suddenly calls from behind him, and it only spurs Jiang Cheng on to run away faster.
He does not want to have this conversation with Wei Wuxian, but he especially doesn’t want to have it in throwing distance of Lan Xichen’s home.
“I need to go home,” Jiang Cheng grits out between clenched teeth as Wei Wuxian falls into step beside him.
“Alright. I’ll accompany you,” Wei Wuxian says with a searching look and Jiang Cheng works his jaw.
“Shouldn’t you be having dinner with your boyfriend?” he bites out but Wei Wuxian only shrugs.
“Seems like spending time with my brother is more important right now,” he easily gives back and then—for once in his life—he falls silent.
Jiang Cheng knows he should be thankful for it, since it doesn’t happen as often as he wishes it did, but he knows that this only means that Wei Wuxian will bombard him with questions later.
Still, Jiang Cheng enjoys the silence, because it gives him time to freak out about this. He never thought he would see Lan Xichen ever again and he has no idea how to deal with this now.
He wonders if Meng Yao is still in the picture, if he returned together with Lan Xichen, but Jiang Cheng forces himself to push those thoughts away when his heart stings.
It doesn’t matter anymore and he shouldn’t care.
What they had is over now.
Wei Wuxian silently keeps up with him until Jiang Cheng closes the door of their apartment behind him and that seems as far as his patience can carry him.
“He’s the one, isn’t he?” Wei Wuxian asks and Jiang Cheng jerks with his words.
“What?” he bites out, his thoughts spinning.
He never dared to think about Lan Xichen like that, but hearing Wei Wuxian say it out loud shakes feelings loose in Jiang Cheng he long thought buried.
“The one you don’t talk about? From your year abroad?” Wei Wuxian goes on, and Jiang Cheng is honestly surprised that he paid enough attention to what Jiang Cheng says to pick up on that.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jiang Cheng says, his back still to Wei Wuxian, but he can practically hear his eyeroll.
“Don’t play stupid now,” Wei Wuxian tells him. “Shijie and I know there’s a big part of that year that you don’t speak about, and we always thought it was rather person-shaped, that hole, but we thought you’d talk about it eventually.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” Jiang Cheng tries, even though he knows it’s futile.
Even if he continues refusing to speak about this, Wei Wuxian has another source now. Jiang Cheng doubts that Lan Xichen is equally hung up over him, so he probably told his brother all about his time with Jiang Cheng and if Lan Zhan knows then it’s most likely only a matter of time before Wei Wuxian knows too.
“What happened?” Wei Wuxian asks, his voice soothing and quiet and Jiang Cheng sighs.
“Nothing,” he says.
“Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian complaints and Jiang Cheng walks away from him.
He goes over to the couch where he flings himself face first into the cushions.
“No, really,” he says, his voice muffled, but Wei Wuxian is settling down on Jiang Cheng’s back, so he must have heard. “We had a thing and then it ended. That’s it.”
“That’s not it, or you would have told us about him. Or you could talk about this now. Do you still have feelings for him?” Wei Wuxian wants to know and Jiang Cheng is glad that he’s already hiding his face away, because he doesn’t know what kind of expression he makes at that question.
It’s such a seemingly innocent question, too, and yet Jiang Cheng feels as if it’s cutting him open, bringing things to the surface he never really dealt with.
Even though Jiang Cheng can barely admit it to himself, he never stopped loving Lan Xichen, never even got past the pain of walking away, despite the fact that he somehow managed to do it.
And he really wasn’t prepared for it all to come crashing down on him like this today.
“I—” he starts but then he almost chokes on his words.
It feels dangerous to admit to his feelings aloud, but Jiang Cheng reminds himself that it’s just Wei Wuxian with him.
And for all of Wei Wuxian’s numerous faults, he would never hold anything against Jiang Cheng or make fun of him for something that still hurts like this.
“I love him,” Jiang Cheng finally admits and then lets out a long suffering sigh when Wei Wuxian manhandles him so that he’s lying on his side.
Wei Wuxian mirrors his position as he slings his arms around Jiang Cheng and then whispers “Tell me about it,” into the space between them.
Jiang Cheng takes a moment to bring his thoughts into order and Wei Wuxian waits rather patiently which is unusual enough that it throws Jiang Cheng off even more.
“There’s not much to say, actually,” Jiang Cheng finally says, realizing that it’s true. “We met during our studies and we both knew that we were only there for a while. Neither of us bothered to tell the other where we came from, but Xichen was staying a year longer than me. We hit it off and we started a—a—” he doesn’t want to call it relationship, because what kind of relationship has a set end-date, but it’s probably what it was.
“Anyway, during my last weeks, Xichen met someone new,” Jiang Cheng says with a bitter twist of his mouth, hating how this still hurts even after all this time. “And I figured this was good, because you know what my mother expected of me, so I thought we could let it end there, no hard feelings, and Xichen would just go on with Meng Yao.”
“So you left without a word,” Wei Wuxian says and Jiang Cheng frowns.
“Not quite,” Jiang Cheng admits, because he hadn’t been able to do that. “We met one last time and I told him I’d be going back in a few days and when we got interrupted by Meng Yao I figured that’s a sign, you know.”
“And you didn’t keep in contact.”
“No. I got rid of my phone number—you know I only had it for my year abroad—and I never gave Xichen my other one. I thought it best to not talk again. I couldn’t have—” Jiang Cheng trails off, because the thought of seeing Lan Xichen and Meng Yao together hurts even now.
“So you don’t know if they got together?” Wei Wuxian asks and Jiang Cheng shrugs as best as he can in this position.
“It seems kind of obvious they did. I’m not sure if they stayed together, but it doesn’t really matter, you know.”
“It does!” Wei Wuxian immediately says. “He’s here now and if they are no longer together, you two could have a chance. It’s not like Madam Yu still dictates who you can date, so it could work out!”
“That would mean I was more to him than just a fling,” Jiang Cheng whispers. “And you’re assuming he still has feelings for me, which is unlikely, especially if he was with Meng Yao in the meantime. It’s just—it’s more likely that he got over me rather quickly, let’s be honest.”
“It’s not more likely,” Wei Wuxian says with vehemence. “You’re very lovable, you stupid idiot.”
“Wow, I really feel the love,” Jiang Cheng gives back with a weak chuckle and then he buries his face in Wei Wuxian’s neck. “I just never thought I would see him again. And now it turns out that he’s your Lan Zhan’s brother. How am I supposed to deal with that?”
“I don’t know yet,” Wei Wuxian whispers into his hair. “But we’re going to figure it out,” he promises him and Jiang Cheng is pretty sure that this is something Wei Wuxian can’t really help him with, but he nods anyway.
It’s nice to have his brother on his side.
~*~*~
Jiang Cheng is really in no mood to entertain guests, so when it knocks on their door he desperately hopes that it’s someone for Wei Wuxian and he can hide in his bedroom.
That hope is thoroughly destroyed when Wei Wuxian yells “Not for me,” out of his room and Jiang Cheng takes a moment to close his eyes and breathe deeply.
Maybe it’s just a package then. They are due for one of Jiang Yanli’s care packages every day now, after all.
That thought lifts his spirits a little bit and Jiang Cheng is noticeably quicker to make his way to the door.
When he opens it though, he wishes he took more time, or simply decided to never open it at all, because Lan Xichen is standing on the other side.
“Wanyin,” Lan Xichen greets him with a small smile and Jiang Cheng closes the door in his face.
“Wei Wuxian!” he yells into the apartment, and glares at Wei Wuxian when he stumbles out of his room.
“What? What?” he gives back, eyes wide in face of Jiang Cheng’s anger and Jiang Cheng narrows his eyes at him.
“Why the fuck is Xichen on the other side of this door?” he demands to know, just waiting for Wei Wuxian to give his awkward laugh and then admitting that he asked him to come.
But instead of that, Wei Wuxian stares at him before he marches over to the door and yanks it open.
“How do you know where we live?” he wants to know, and Jiang Cheng hides behind the door.
“Wangji told me,” Lan Xichen admits and Jiang Cheng can still imagine how he sheepishly shrugs his shoulders.
The knowledge should probably not hurt like this, but the sting to Jiang Cheng’s heart is very real.
“How dare he,” Wei Wuxian mutters and at least Jiang Cheng can sleep easier, knowing that his brother didn’t rat him out.
“Don’t be mad with him, he can’t say no to me,” Lan Xichen quickly says and Jiang Cheng remembers him talking about the little brother he dotes upon.
He should have probably worried more about Lan Xichen finding him, Jiang Cheng realizes with a start.
“What do you want?” Wei Wuxian demands to know, his hand tightening on the door.
“I wish to speak to Wanyin,” Lan Xichen says and Jiang Cheng closes his eyes.
Of course he does.
“Why?” Wei Wuxian says and Jiang Cheng sighs, because he really does not want to involve Wei Wuxian any further into his love life—or lack thereof—than this.
So Jiang Cheng steps out from behind the door, desperately avoiding to look at Lan Xichen directly, but he still gestures him inside.
“Let’s talk in my room,” he says and leads the way without checking if Lan Xichen is following him or not.
He knows Lan Xichen took his invitation when the door closes softly behind them and Jiang Cheng braces himself before he turns around.
He didn’t get a good look at Lan Xichen before he ran away the other day, but now he looks his fill and he has to admit that Lan Xichen looks just as amazing as he used to and it makes Jiang Cheng’s heart beat faster.
He has always been weak for Lan Xichen.
“What do you want?” he brusquely asks, crossing his arms in front of his chest and Lan Xichen’s gaze softens.
“I love you,” Lan Xichen says and Jiang Cheng’s breath catches. “I loved you then and I love you now,” he goes on and smiles at Jiang Cheng, though there’s a sad tinge to it. “I know our time was limited—we both knew that from the start—but I tried to push that thought out of my mind, especially when your year neared its end. And then suddenly the day was already there and I didn’t get a chance to tell you, or ask you if maybe you wanted to keep in touch, or stay together.”
“Meng Yao—” Jiang Cheng says, because it’s the only thing he can think about, how Meng Yao looked at Lan Xichen and how Lan Xichen smiled at him.
“He confessed to me that day,” Lan Xichen says with a nod, and Jiang Cheng frowns when he notices the hint of anger in his voice. “As if he didn’t know that we were together. But I guess he simply didn’t care,” Lan Xichen mutters before he shakes his head. “I told him no, because I’m in love with you.”
“You wanted to stay in touch,” Jiang Cheng mutters and Lan Xichen shrugs.
“Yes. I tried calling you, but your number was out of service and I thought that was your way of cutting all ties between us. But I never stopped thinking about you, and I never stopped loving you and I thought you should know. You—didn’t seem happy when you saw me,” Lan Xichen unsurely adds and Jiang Cheng lets out a long breath.
“It caught me off guard,” Jiang Cheng admits and then wonders how to go on.
But Lan Xichen has already been so honest and Jiang Cheng thinks that it’s time he does the same.
“I never got over that year, over you,” he whispers out. “But I didn’t know where you lived and with what my mother wanted from me—I thought it would just be easier to just forget about it, so I walked away without really giving you a chance to say anything.”
“You know where I live now,” Lan Xichen says and the hope in his voice is unmistakable. “What about your mother?”
“We’re no longer on speaking terms,” Jiang Cheng admits and dares to smile at Lan Xichen. “So I guess she doesn’t get to decide who I date.”
“And who do you want to date?” Lan Xichen asks as he steps closer to Jiang Cheng, who bridges the last gap between them and simply hugs Lan Xichen hard.
“You. I only ever wanted to date you,” he admits, because it’s easier to say it when he has Lan Xichen in his arms and Lan Xichen crushes him to his chest.
“I have missed you so much,” Lan Xichen whispers into his hair and Jiang Cheng shudders.
Lan Xichen’s painfully familiar smell engulfs him and Jiang Cheng feels like crying, he is so happy.
“I have missed you, too,” he gives back.
When Lan Xichen gently pushes him away, Jiang Cheng makes a panicked noise, but it turns into a helpless moan when Lan Xichen kisses him.
“I’m never going to let you go again,” Lan Xichen promises and Jiang Cheng has to fight the sting of tears at hearing that. “I’m going to keep you, this time.”
“Lucky you, that I want to be kept,” Jiang Cheng says, but he can’t muster to sound stern at all and Lan Xichen seems to know it too, because he chuckles.
Jiang Cheng is helpless against the smile that drags out of him, but then he firms his face into a scowl.
“But you know what that means, right?” he asks and Lan Xichen stills, before he frowns.
“What?” he warily asks, his hands tightening their hold on Jiang Cheng.
“Double dates with our brothers,” Jiang Cheng says after a long moment and Lan Xichen stares at him, before he drops his head onto Jiang Cheng’s shoulder.
“Don’t scare me like that,” he mutters, sending a shiver down Jiang Cheng’s back when he tilts his head to press featherlight kisses into his neck.
“I think it’s a very scary prospect,” Jiang Cheng still gives back as he slings his arms around Lan Xichen’s middle again. “You haven’t seen Wei Wuxian in action yet.”
“Ah, but I’m looking forward to it. Because it means you’re still in my life,” Lan Xichen says and Jiang Cheng goes bright red because what are you even supposed to say to something like that.
“You are the worst romantic in the world.”
“Maybe. But I’m going to romance you just right,” Lan Xichen promises him and then silences Jiang Cheng with another kiss.
Jiang Cheng thinks this might be the only acceptable way to shut him right up, especially if it’s Lan Xichen.
Only if it’s Lan Xichen.