Chapter Text
𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒐
• ———— •
Henry woke up with a start.
Swaddled with thick blankets and two strong warm arms curled loosely around his waist he felt trapped. Sweat clung to his skin and his chest caved as a long expel of air slipped past his lips.
He blinked rapidly, forcing the urge to fall right back asleep away as his brain managed to convince him for a brief moment, he and Alex weren’t alone. That there was something sinister in the shadows of their bedroom.
However, after sitting up, clinging onto the sheets below him and gazing across the dark corners for a few long, spine-tingling minutes, he managed to reach the conclusion they were both perfectly fine, and he had overreacted.
He closed his eyes, sighing.
Memories of the nightmare had already faded, he could picture bits and pieces, general gory, horrid things the mind could come up with, reminiscent of a few horror tales he had watched in the past. Nothing overwhelmingly terrifying, enough to force him to click on the bedside lamp and melt into the plush headboard.
His head tipped back, gazing at the ceiling quietly. Nightmares were an odd evolution of the mind - he couldn’t begin to think why they would occur. He knew nightmares were often the result of increased stress or poor mental health, and while the youth shelters do take up a lot of his time, he wouldn’t consider himself a stressed out person.
Since he and Alex had settled down in their brownstone, his health has improved too. He supposes the only thing he could do was chalk this up to (annoying) brain activity. After all, dreams never really meant anything to him.
He turned off the light and laid down, rolling onto his side and gazing across Alex’s face.
He looked peaceful. His worried lines from law school smoothed out, his soft lips parted as small breaths escaped him. His lashes laid against his brown cheeks and his hair curled deliciously over his forehead.
He lifted a hand, gently trailing a finger across his jaw, smiling.
Alex was beautiful. He was incredible. Funny. Outstandingly intelligent yet overwhelmingly stupid at the same time.
He leaned forward and kissed the bridge of his nose.
He was everything Henry adored. Even over a year into their relationship he was still surprised it even formed in the first place. The moment Alex said he’d leave after he came barging in, calling him an ‘obtuse fucking asshole’, Henry thought it was over - but as soon as he punctuated it with ‘as soon as you tell me to leave’, somehow he knew, he knew he’d never truly lose Alex.
Not that he wanted to then, especially not now. He loved him. It was almost painful at times. When they weren’t together, he was thinking about him. When they were together, he was thinking about everything they could do together.
When they were cuddled up in bed, their alarm clock glaring two thirty am, dark shadows casted over them, Henry was thinking how lucky he was.
And how much he wanted him awake.
It was jolting, the sudden and abrupt realisation he wanted Alex awake, right now , nightmares weren’t frequent but the few times he’s had them he’s never needed to wake Alex up.
But something painful contracted his chest and he was notified to the horrid, laboured breathing barely bringing oxygen to his lungs. Panic attack. He was having a panic attack. How had he not realised?
“Alex” he gasped, clutching his shoulder, propping himself up on his elbow. “Alex, love- wake up” he begged, screwing his eyes shut as he ran a poor breathing technique through his head. In for seven, in for seven… he barely managed three seconds each time, and he couldn’t hold the air for they ripped his lips open and expelled themselves as if his lungs were objecting them.
“Alex, please,” he said loudly, weakly.
Alex sat up sharply, hands reaching out to automatically clutch onto him. “Baby?” He whispered, squinting. “What’s wrong? What’s happening?”
“I can’t-breathe-“ he spluttered, Alex sat them both up, soothing a hand up and down the ridges off his back, the other reaching for Henry’s and intertwining their fingers together once he found it.
“Alright, baby, I’ve got you, I’m here, you’re fine” he whispered, kissing his jaw. “Keep taking breaths. Doesn’t matter for how long, keep doing it, focus on holding it, okay? Whatever you do, hold them in” he said, lips brushing the shell of his ear.
Henry nodded, a quiet, pathetic whimper spilling past his lips.
Alex hushed him, “you’re okay, baby” he promised. Henry believed him.
He did as told; ignoring how much air he brought in, as long as it was some, and focused on holding it, allowing his lungs time to collect as much from it as they could before, five seconds later at most, he threw it out. However, he didn’t let that deter him, with Alex bringing him into his lap, curling every limb around him and whispering soft praise, he managed to elongate the seconds every few times, feeling his chest begin to ache less and less as time went by.
He felt grounded enough to hold Alex’s hand back a while later.
He felt more grounded now he could feel Alex’s hand properly on his back.
He could relax when his brain registered everything Alex said, the touch of his lips, the gentle brush of his hair against his temple.
He let out a long sigh, eyes slipping shut as if they were weighed down.
“There you go,” Alex smiled softly, “feeling better?”
“Much. Thank you” Henry murmured, breathless, achy, but fine.
They laid down, Alex throwing the blanket over him, then messily joining their legs together until it would be impossible for someone to decide which belonged to who.
“Where did that come from, baby?” He asked quietly, knuckles stroking his jaw. Henry leaned into him appreciatively.
“I think... from a nightmare” he admitted, “I didn’t notice at first. I was so caught up thinking about you I didn’t give myself a moment to realise I was panicking” he explained further, the way the corner of Alex’s lip quirked not going unnoticed.
He rolled his eyes, “yes, yes, I was thinking about you. When am I not?”
Alex chuckled, shifting them closer and gently kissing his lips.
“I can’t stop thinking about you either” he gave in, “what was the nightmare about?”
Henry closed his eyes, twisting up his face. “I… couldn’t remember if I tried. I think my gran was involved. Or maybe that was the nun from the conjuring”
Alex cracked a grin, “not that there’s a huge difference”
“Oi” Henry chastised, grinning briefly, “I wouldn’t be surprised if she put microphones in every room”
Alex laughed, “she’s gotten a few wonderful shows of our intimate love, then”
Henry grimaced at the idea, “our sex life and my gran should never be put in the same sentence”
Alex laughed again, kissing up his jaw until he reached his lips, letting them both float in a moment of soft familiarity. Their lips were smooth, slightly moist as they pushed and moulded against each other.
They parted for air a minute later, breaths hitting each other’s faces, dancing across the apples of their cheeks.
“Thank you” Henry murmured. “I’m sorry for waking you”
Alex frowned, laying an arm over his waist. “Don’t apologise” he murmured, “you know I’d do anything for you”
Henry’s heart squeezed, “I do. You’re right. I… have no idea what came over me”
“The mind can be fucking cruel sometimes” he dismissed, “and any time it does, I’ll be here to help. Of course-“ he slowly smiled, “I could always beat up your brain for hurting you”
Henry chuckled mirthfully, “beat up my brain, hm? Sounds like a recipe for disaster”
“Deserves it for hurting you” he shrugged. Henry sighed, shutting his eyes.
“I still can’t believe you punched that paparazzi,” he murmured. Alex grunted.
“He touched your ass, Henry! He fucking deserved it”
Henry, even at the mention of the extremely uncomfortable moment he endured two months ago, smiled. Alex was made aware almost instantly what the paparazzi had done simply because his eyes seemingly never left Henry’s body when they were together. He saw the hand, watched the way Henry tensed once he realised that hand didn’t belong to Alex, and for a brief moment saw red.
The next moment, he was blinking down at a paparazzi, sprawled across the floor, holding his bloodied nose.
The press went wild. Alex wouldn’t have taken back his actions regardless.
“It was… definitely hot,” Henry admitted. Alex snorted. “And sweet. I love you”
Alex settled against him, kissing the space between his eyebrows. “I’m always hot, and I love you too”
Henry smiled wide, though it soon settled as a wave of exhaustion visibly toppled over him. He stifled a yawn. Alex chucked.
“Go to sleep, baby”
Henry hummed, nestling into him. “Goodnight, love”
“Goodnight, sweetheart” Alex kissed his temple, feeling his body melt and breathing soften as he slipped into slumber.
For the next hour Alex dozed in and out of consciousness, making sure Henry wasn’t stirring or appeared frightened due to another nightmare.
Only when he was sure he would be okay, he fell asleep too.
The next morning they awoke in a tangle of limbs and a set of warm smiles reserved only for each other.
• ———— •
𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅𝒃𝒚𝒆