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His fingers weaved through the grass, feeling their dampness coat his frigid hands. It was too early in the morning, the sun had barely risen from its slumber yet he had barely slept.
It seemed that he had been here for a long time yet had no recollection of ever waking up and walking here. He barely could remember what he had done a few hours prior.
Too much was on his mind, probably.
It seemed he wasn’t going to catch a break either. It was a spiral towards the abyss at this point for him. His sorrows and worries were almost tangible. At least, he wanted them to be. If they were tangible then maybe he could manually fix them. He could buy a toolbox and get a screw, a hammer, some nails to finish up his work to really contain and stabilize all his issues.
That was a silly thought that he could entertain every once in a while.
He was fed up, almost bored with the sitting position he had been in which seemed like forever. He got up from the ground, turning to make his way to his dorm room when his eyes met her gaze.
He sharply stopped, eyes staring at her form. He took her in, feeling longing and quiet ache bloom in his chest at her silhouette. She wasn’t dressed in her usual uniform, she only sported a sweater and shorts in the cool early morning breeze. Her head of hair was a mess and there were pillow marks on her face. She looked like she just woke up, eyes blinking blearily at him in confusion.
It seemed as though she suffered the exact opposite fate that he was instilled with. She slept way too deeply compared to him. Yet, he still wondered why she was up so early and here out of all places to be.
What was she doing here?
“Kugisaki?”
“What are you doing here?” She asked, voice hoarse and cracky.
Megumi paused, his ears perked up, not used to her sounding strained. She slept too much, for sure.
“Sitting.”
“No, what are you doing here?”
I came to see you.
Those words echoed in his head, repeating themselves over and over. There was a sheen layer of confusion, one stained with rose colored glasses.
Why’d he come to see her here?
“Will you come back?” He asked earnestly, feet dragging him towards her figure. His mouth seemed to speak for him. His tongue seemed foreign and his actions and feelings were all going haywire at the sight of the girl right in front of him. His hands itched to slide over her cheeks. His hands itched to feel something tangible.
She tilted her head to the side, shivering in the breeze. Her hands came to wrap around herself, nails digging into her flesh.
Megumi’s eyes trailed her movements swiftly.
“It’s cold here,” she mumbled tiredly avoiding his question. Her cheeks were sunken, her flesh was too pale and sickly, and her once vibrant eyes didn’t shine the way they used to.
That’s when it clicked, Megumi’s head spiraled into a quiet despair as he finally reached her, hands passing through her form. He persisted trying to get a hold of her hands and arms. It went on for a couple of minutes which had felt like hours to the boy. When he finally gave up he hovered his fingers over her cheeks, thinking hard about the last time he cupped them. He imagined what it was like to feel her warmth seep through his flesh, soaking him up in her loud brilliance.
He couldn’t touch her. He couldn’t hug her. He couldn’t warm her up.
He couldn’t feel her.
“I know, it’s cold.” He muttered, eyes looking into her caramel ones.
“I’m tired, Fushiguro,” she replied, gazing back into his blue orbs. He bit his lip seeing how shallow and weak her exhales were.
“Just promise me one thing, Kugisaki.”
She hummed, eyes shutting. He longed to shake her awake, to have her open her eyes and look back at him the way she used to.
“Come back.”
She smiled, “is that your curse to me, dummy?”
“Yes.”