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“Were you home all evening?” Lorelai asks, entering her home, surprised to find her daughter in front of the tv.
“I dream of Jeannie' Was on,” Rory replies lazily. She has been watching it since the evening when her mother went out and now she was home, and here Rory was, still camped in front of the tv.
“I can’t believe I have a better social life than my twenty-five-year-old daughter” Lorelai huffs, dropping her bag on the floor and settling herself beside her daughter. “You should be out getting drunk, wasted, tumbled - You should go clubbing”
“There’s no club here”
“Fine then, go to a party”
“To doula’s fifth birthday? Because that’s the only party around here” Rory says sarcastically.
“Point is, Rory, you need to get out and be a reckless youth”
“Mom, I don’t need any more excitement in my life. I travel all the time, meet interesting people and that’s enough” Rory reasons.
And that was true too, she did travel a lot and meet very interesting people; None she liked enough to date but she did have a pretty exciting life. But if you were the sort of snob that dwelled on the dictionary definition of truth, she was totally lying. She hadn’t been with anyone for almost a year now, hell, she hadn’t even entered the wretched dating scene.
“Haven’t you thought about setting up roots, you know, preferably before Emily Gilmore starts setting you up with high society boys?” Lorelai asks, raising her eyebrows.
That sounds like the thing Emily Gilmore might do. Grandma Gilmore was actually calling Rory with updates about fine men who passed ivy leagues - but updates were what it was. Not an invitation for love. Not a set-up. She was merely hinting at this point, forcing her to date would be the next step.
“I’ll talk to grandma if needed,” Rory laughs, pressing play on her remote and leaning onto Lorelai’s shoulders.
***
“Oh my god” Rory closed her eyes as soon as stepped on the road near the gazebo, the next morning. It was Miss Patty frenching a young man. A very young man, she might add. She scowls, covering her eyes “Is that even legal? He looks like a teenager”
“My first thought too. Turns out he’s in his 30s. Teaches theatre in Hartford”
“We should get his skincare routine” Rory points out, admiring his seemingly flawless skin from afar. Lorelai shoots a thumbs up, “Way ahead of you, dawg”
“I saved a seat for you here, it was filling up” Luke smiles as he leads his beau to the end of the diner, near a corner window - her favourite seat. He even throws a pleasant hello and a pat on the head to Rory who is now practically his daughter and rushes to the kitchen. Rory is looking over at the specials board when Luke waltzes in with a plate of eggs just the way Lorelai loves and a blueberry muffin “And here is your usual”
It was Valentine’s day!
No wonder everyone around her seemed to be in love hopelessly. The whole of Stars Hollow was covered with balloons and hearts. People were on the streets, hand in hand, smiling at everything and nothing. Even Luke’s diner was filled with couples feeding each other. She had to step out of this maniacal town. The more she was trying to escape Love, the more it was following her.
“I’ll have a french toast, thanks” Rory stops near the counter to recite her order. Jess dutifully nods and shouts the order into the kitchen. It had been a month since Jess had ‘popped in for a visit’ in stars hollow - first, he was helping Luke with something and now he’s helping Liz and TJ; Point was he was still there. He and Rory hung out too. Only sometimes.
Initially, they kept bumping into each other at Andrew’s bookshop and then at the Diner - awkwardly exchanging silent glances and petty hellos; until one day when Jess just gave up and outright asked to hang out with her instead of bumping into places. Since then, they were on track for a fast friendship. Which on numerous accounts concerned Lorelai but Jess working at Diner meant Lorelai was well fed so she made her peace with it. Something about Jess being grown-up also helped.
“God they’re bumming me out with their love” Rory glares at Luke and her mother who were now talking nonstop and giggling.
“Someone sounds jolly”
“It’s like I left and the whole town has decided to sprinkle love in the air,” Rory said with utmost disgust in her voice, frowning at all lovey-dovey couples she could find. “Even Taylor found somebody.
Jess laughs, heartily. Something about Rory Gilmore, the lover of humanity, complaining and sniping on matters of love amused him. He shakes his head, “Come on, you have someone in your life. Bruno, remember?”
It was clear from Rory’s face that she did, in fact, not date anyone named Bruno; Or at least as far as her recollection goes, she didn’t. Jess drops his wipe cloth on the table, struggling to remember their early occasional conversations on phone “You went on walks in the park”
It was as though her memory had betrayed her but it didn’t and reminded her of just who Bruno was. Her face falls small, she replies dramatically, without looking up from her shoes “Oh my god. That’s my roommate’s dog”
“Sorry. Rory- where are you goi-?”
“Mom, you are right I am pathetic” Rory sighs, sinking into the chair beside her mother, as she hurried away from the counter. She didn’t need any further embarrassment. Lorelai stopped eating her eggs, caressing Rory’s cheek, asking her what happened. Rory lets out, sneering “I haven’t been with anyone for almost a year - The last guy I went out with, went to the bathroom alone and came back with Miss Mcleggy. There, this Jess thought Bruno was my boyfriend”
“Hang on, he’s not your boyfriend?”
“My roommate’s dog that I walk in the park occasionally” she flails her arm in the sky in frustration “See, pathetic”
“You’re not pathetic…” Lorelai laughs at her daughter’s sad account. Sometimes Lorelai forgot how much Rory had turned out like her - utter cynicism for loving humans and complete optimism for love of movies and food; She catches her daughter’s free hand on the table, squeezing it reassuringly “you just haven’t found the right guy. You’re not looking properly. Maybe the guy is right in front of you - maybe you just need to see it. This is one of those things in life that you cannot sort of with a pro cons list, It takes time and effort and lots of heartbreaks”
“I need to make a list.” Rory sits up straight in her seat, her face filled with a new hope shining “List of qualities I am looking for in a person - then it’s easier to look”
“Uh Rory, Maybe you didn’t hear mommy, I said it won’t work” Lorelai tried to explain to her daughter but there was this other thing she had forgotten Rory had inherited - stubbornness. Rory just had to realise how crazy her idea was and how impossible it was to work and she would come to her senses. Tough parenting, a new approach to dealing with an adult daughter.
"Mom, you’re a genius” Rory beams, still smiling, as she gives her mother a hug. She picks a piece of toast from the plate Jess was coming to serve her and runs out “Oh hi, Jess. Bye Jess”
“What is -”
“You don’t wanna know” Lorelai rolls her eyes, taking the plate of food Jess had brought to the table and digs into it.
***
Qualities of the Perfect Man for Rory Gilmore:
Number One: He has to be a gentleman
(No more treating her like dirt or a prize or a possession. If she was going to be with someone it would be with someone who knew her worth)
Number Two: He must be culturally knowledgeable.
(Sorry, Dean. Gone were her days of scrounging for topics of conversation and comparing Hunter Thompson to Jane Austen)
Number Three: He must be driven and must have his own personal ambition which he strives to achieve.
(No leeches. She didn’t need to baby him into making something of himself. No more men who claimed they were doing the job they hate because daddy said so)
Number Four: He must be attentive to her needs.
(i.e. not constantly wrapped up in business/friends/life-threatening activities. She considered herself a reasonable woman who always paid attention to her boyfriend’s needs. Was it too much to ask him to do the same?)
Number Five: He must be devoted to her and only her.
(She was momentarily distracted by thoughts of Logan and his various bridesmaids.)
Number Six: He must be romantic.
(At this point, she was reaching. Still, a sound point.)
Number Seven: He must make her really, truly happy.
(most essential)
***
“You made a list?” Lane laughs while folding the pile of laundry in front of you. Immediately after completing her list, Rory felt the need for her list to be validated - in case she was being highly unreasonable. Only one person came to her mind - her best friend Lane Kim. She was romantic, thoughtful and most importantly she loved Rory, hence she would always be a good judge of character. Lane threw a sweater at Rory, gesturing her to fold it “That’s the most Rory Gilmore thing to do”
“Well, I am Rory Gilmore so”
“Let me see” Lane grabs the list from Rory's hand and perused it with a thoughtful look on her face. She's been considering the list for a long time. At last, she finally beams, smile flowing to her eyes “Rory, You know who matches every single point in this list — Jess”
That was … so wrong.
There was no way anything on the list matched Jess - Jess who left her twice Mariano, Jess who asked her to run away with him Mariano, Jess who lied to her Mariano, Jess who wrote a book Mariano, Jess who made her go back to Yale - at this point, she had to yell at her brain to shut up because that list was no way helping her contend against Lane’s argument. She chugs a glass of water to shake out any further thoughts on that topic because it was only ridiculous.
"Culturally... ambitious… Think about it. He's a perfect fit" Lane insists, taking a seat beside Rory. From the look on Lane's face, it was clear to Rory that she would go through each point thoroughly to prove Jess was Rory's perfect match.
"Lane, this is insane. It must be your mommy brain talking" Rory let out a peal of hesitant, breathy laughter. She rubs his hands together, shaking her head vehemently, "I am going to leave"
***
She had to get out of that situation - Because Lane is wrong. Very wrong. There was no way in this world or any other worlds that might have existed in this universe where Jess would meet any of the criteria on that list. Well, of course, he would have some minor points or else why else Rory would have chosen to date him.
Rory sat down near the bench across the diner and looked at her list carefully. She would be very empty-headed to even consider that as a possibility but what’s the harm in checking. She read out the first point;
He has to be a gentleman - Well, it’s not like she can entirely deny this. He had some gentleman-ly qualities; at least enough to still be in the game.
He must be culturally knowledgeable - Sure, she could give him this. He did have good taste in music, books and art; Not sports but at least he was knowledgeable in all things that mattered to her.
He must be driven and must have his own personal ambition which he strives to achieve - No doubts there. He was a published author by age on twenty-one - still striving to write and publish more;
He must be attentive to her needs. - Attentive to her needs? He couldn’t even deduce she needed Fries with her ice cream the other day.
He must be devoted to her and only her - She was certain teenage Jess was devoted to her and her only. But it has been eight years too late to hope that Jess would still be holding a candle out for her. But if she gave it much thought, he seemed like the kind of person who held an incredible amount of respect for monogamous relationships.
He must be romantic. - She laughed out loud at this point - No way, he was romantic. He was Jess - simply Jess. He had his moments where he was soft to her but romantic might be reaching it.
Lane was wrong after all. So what he came out passing in flying colours in 4/6 points on her list - he still had failed two. Plus, the points he cleared were generic - so mostly it didn’t even apply to him is what Rory told herself until her eyes fell on the last point she had written.
He must make her really, truly happy. - She couldn’t form any coherent thoughts, she just sat there and stared at it for a long time.
***
All she wanted to do was go home and hug her mommy - but her mommy, like all regular people on valentine’s day, was on a date with Luke and she had to go through all of ‘there-is-a-chance-of-Jess-being-the-love-of-her-life’ alone. She spots Jess behind the counter from the bench and walks inside. Well, if Lane thinks he fits the match then she might as well check it out.
She smiles at him pleasantly as she sits in a secluded corner. All the movies she had watched from childhood had taught her that for thorough sleuthing one needed to place themselves out of the line of sight of the person they were watching - Preferably with a hat and a newspaper. Well, she could throw the hat and newspaper out as in her beloved town, one could spot a resident or non-resident from miles away.
She observes him walking around the tables dropping and picking up orders. She could have easily written him off the romantic contenders’ list if it weren’t for the past month. Jess and Rory hadn’t properly acquainted with one another ever since they broke up. Sure, they met each other every now and then and exchanged pleasantries. She even called him to talk about his book a few times. All information that they had on each other was given by Lorelai and Luke. But that last month when he had seemingly moved back to town was something else.
Rory was transported back to her teen years struggling through her feelings, going through her rebellion phase, doing things she never thought of before. She loved hanging with him now. It was awkward in the beginning, but it was them - Rory and Jess; Jess and Rory; They always were deeply connected - they didn’t need words, they didn’t need explanations; They just got each other.
She has been thinking a lot about him too. Not necessarily in an intimate capacity but in the sense of everything around her reminded her of him and everything she witnessed she wanted him to do so too. She called him about the movies she had been to; she lent him books she wanted to have discussions on; she liked discussing Kirk’s new haircuts with him.
This was the very reason she couldn’t remove him as a romantic possibility. They shared that connection; but also because she wanted something more.
She absent-mindedly scrawls the name Jess? Across her list.
“What you got there?”
The voice startles her. She quickly hides that sheet of paper covering it with her cardigan clad arms. It was Jess standing there with a stupid grin on his face, kettle in his hand, his heart up the sleeve. A sly smile forms on Rory’s face wondering what would have been the consequences if he had in fact seen her list. She snaps, still smiling “It’s Nothing. It’s personal. Go away”
He doesn’t though, he just stands there sheepishly “Listen about the whole Bruno thing”
“Don’t worry about it”
“Coffee?” he asks, lifting up his pot. She nods. Miss Patty taps Jess on his shoulder, “Tomorrow’s plan still good?”
“Yeah, see you at 11” He mutters to Miss Patty who was leaving and turns to Rory whose face was filled with question marks. He explains, “I promised I would help out with some repairs around her dance studio”
She sips her coffee for the longest time until there is nothing to sip. She’s just sitting there watching him clandestinely. The way he moved gracefully all around the diner as if it were his own. The way his long eyelashes curled when he was carefully preparing an order. The way his face puffed with crankiness when he was annoyed with Taylor. The way a small vein popped in his arm when he was writing down orders. The way his hair was set perfectly - curly, messy bouncing at every opportunity he walked a bit too fast.
She observes him dealing with Kirk with the same kindness Luke does. Not that they weren’t annoyed by him. But they weren’t also not not annoyed by him. Kirk was one of the kindest souls in Stars Hollow and Luke and Jess always respected that. Jess was nodding patiently as Kirk was recounting his day, “I was in my tenth job when I remembered I had forgotten today was Valentine’s day. No wonder Lulu was upset with me this morning. She didn’t even tell me goodbye. I have ruined everything”
“Okay, how about I make you a food basket with all her favourite food, that way you can make it up to her” Jess smiles.
Kirk nods, “But she is allergic to swiss cheese and I am allergic to -”
“Peanuts, I know. Come back in an hour to pick it up. Now scram, you’re scaring away the customers''
She is now frustrated. Couldn’t he have yelled at two customers and abandoned his job mid-shift? That’s the least he could do to help her not fall in love with him. She was manifesting for a teenage Jess Mariano who was dead in a ditch somewhere and a new, fresh, rules obeying, respecting elders Jess had taken his place. She crumpled her list in exasperation and folded her arms, grumpily.
Jess magically appeared in front of her in thin air, placing a plate in front of her. She asks, lazily, “Why?”
“You look like you need a lemon tart”
“I do?”
“Violent paper crushing usually signals a need for a tart”
“What if I'd crushed something else?” She can’t help but smile. He was so much like Luke unknowingly.
“I would've bought you jello shots”
“What?”
“Luke makes the rules, I just carry them out,” he says, as matter of fact, in a very serious tone and walks away leaving Rory grinning.
It’s been two long hours and there’s no sign of Rory going home. She likes being there. There was food, And there was Jess. She liked that he smiled at her from behind the counter. She liked that he noticed that her cup was empty and poured coffee. She liked that he bought her his copy of Rebecca because he saw that she was getting bored and restless. She liked the butterflies that swarmed into her stomach when his eyes met hers. She liked that she had all of his eyes even though there was a half-naked almost drunk woman eyeing him hungrily.
“Are you...staying?” Jess clears his throat and asks carefully as Rory is deeply immersed in her reading. She looks up at him, frowning. Did he want her to leave? She looks around. The whole diner was practically empty except for them. Even the drunk lady had given up on him and left. She asks, suspicious “Why? Have you got a date?”
“Does it look like I got a date?” Jess laughs audibly. Her eyes lit up. He didn’t want her to leave. Really. He actually wanted to ask her if they could hang out. But thanks to his masters in communicative skills, he only ended up making her self conscious. She starts stuffing stuff into her bag, “Sorry. I don’t want to intrude. I can be a single, sulky woman from confines of my house too”
“No stay.” he held his hand out blocking her way, his voice almost desperate. “No one is here. Keep me entertained”
She stays back, grinning “What’s in it for me?”
“Cream cheese bagel?”
“Eh,” she pouts while he grabs her bag and puts it on the counter, gesturing to her to take a seat.
***
“What’s this?” she asks, pleasantly taken aback when an hour later Jess presents himself along with a mountain load of snacks. He places it in front of her, “We might as well have a blast”
“Pop-tarts! pizza! Gummy worms!” she exclaimed excitedly picking up the food items one by one like she was a 5-year old kid on Halloween.
“Nothing healthy” he smirks, reciting her favourite words and adds, pulling out a bottle from the back “And lots of alcohol. Plus A nightmare on elm’s street - perfect valentine movie, don’t ya think?”
“Oh my god” she laughs, picking up the snacks load and walking in the direction of the stairs that lead to the bedroom above the diner.
“Personally, it’s very stupid. The whole thing” she declares shutting her book. They were done watching two movies, eating a whole pizza, and drinking copious amounts of cheap wine. It definitely seemed like a perfect time to have an intellectual literary discussion. Rory had just finished re-reading Rebecca which was astonishingly Jess’ favourite book. Now it was time to eviscerate it.
“It’s a masterpiece, c’mon”
“No. I mean, when she found out her hus …. That man *gestures stabbing* his first wife - she’s happy. And we’re supposed to … root for her?” Rory swings her arms all over her head. It was very clear to her and Jess that she was pretty drunk by then. That was a sight to put in a museum - Rory Gilmore hammered out of her brains still trying to hold up a book discussion. Amidst all that, she still was a true Gilmore - lover of food, she asked politely “Oh, can I have your fries?”
He pushes his plate across to her. She picks up one fry. Then another. And another. Before coming back to her point, “The only reasonable person in the novel is Rebecca… who’s painted as a villain. What was her crime? Huh. She didn’t deserve any of this”
“Well, you are right. And she did get everything she wanted by the end of the novel” he reasons, without taking his eyes off of her, “But you have to admit the Madame du Maurier’s writing is classic”
She pretends to think for a minute bringing her fingers to the tip of her chin before nodding, “That I can drink to. Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again - perfect opening line.”
“You seem to have blended into the town well” Rory comments, lying on the ground drawing imaginary figures into the air. He stays silent. She continues, “Never did I ever think that a day would come where Jess Mariano would willingly helping out kirk or Miss Patty”
“When in Rome, right?” he shrugs, trying to change the topic.
“Why?”
“I tried the whole angry, bitter I-hate-everything outlook, but it didn't work out very well. So I finally made peace with everything” he replies slowly, fiddling with buttons on Luke’s radio. A song starts playing.
“How’s that working?”
“Peachy” he speaks, abruptly getting on his feet, extending his hand towards hers. She looks up at him, confused. He simply smiles, “I am creating prom 2.0. I believe I owe you a dance”
“Jess, are you serious?” she asks, her eyes widened, as she sits up cross-legged. His hands are still extended and he still has that stupid smile that she can’t get enough of. He wiggles his eyebrows, “Dead serious, look I even got dido on”
“Only if you play something else” she brushes her hand against his palm, playfully. He shrugs, tuning back into Luke’s radio, changing stations constantly until Strangers in the night come on. He beams at her, proud of his decision. She holds out her hand towards him. He picks it gently and helps her up.
In the beginning, it was as though they were miles apart. Two non-entities swaying around in their place. Rory takes it upon herself to make the bold move of moving closer to him. She notices he stiffens by her sudden approach and mercifully backs off. He, who was amazingly surprised by her move, regains his senses as he grasps her hand and pulls her closer.
She thuds into his chest by his unexpected yank, leaving them both in fits of giggles. Her hands slowly make their way to clasp behind his neck while his hands automatically fall on her waist, tugging her closer. She refuses to take her eyes off his eyes even though she could feel the rose mounting her cheeks. She pulls his brown tendrils in a desperate attempt to not falter or faint. They were both still inebriated by wine and none of them were having any rational thoughts.
They are leaning into one another leaving no gap between them. She could practically feel his heavy breath on hers. She has this fuzzy feeling in her stomach that she needs to quench. She has her eyes closed in anticipation of tasting his sweet lips any moment now. She is ready to drown in the pool of Jess Mariano love. The one she had often dreamt of. Only for their trance to be broken by a loud radio announcement.
MATTRESS KING OFFERS YOU A 15% DISCOUNT
Rory was the first to break into laughter and Jess was the first to detangle himself from her. He rubs his hands over the crook of his neck, unable to meet her eyes, flushed. He fumbles a good amount before hastily picking up some of their cups and plates off the ground, speaking in a shaky voice “I’ll just drop these off downstairs, Luke’s gonna flip...if he - “
“Good, great. You do that” she pants, sifting through some empty food carton boxes on the ground just for the sake of doing something. She is collecting all plastics and shoving them into a trash bag when her eyes fall upon a handwritten manuscript. Pages were crumpled. It seemed really old. She could identify Jess’ handwriting from anywhere. Curious, she picked it up.
An orphan teen boy from London was sent to live with his grandfather in a small town. He didn’t know his grandfather at all. He hadn’t even been to that town before. He had set his plan in motion to get into trouble in the town so that his grandfather would get rid of him. If only his plan wasn’t derailed by a town princess. She was the first one to be kind to him in that town and who actually believed in him. The first time he felt capable of love. But things went downhill pretty fast. Despite his best attempts, he was failing school and his uncle was set to send him away. He had terribly disappointed the girl; shattering all her hopes and dreams of him. She lit up his whole life whereas he couldn’t even provide her with a moment of happiness. In the dead of the night, he ran out. That was the best for everyone. Grandfather wouldn’t have to take any shit from the town. The girl wouldn’t have to deal with the ordeal of breaking up with him as he was neither high in society nor highly educated. He was helping everyone out. With him gone, the whole town left a sigh of relief. Everyone was happy.
“Alright, you won me over. I’ll let you explain why you think poetry is amazing” he’s laughing when he enters the room more composed than before. Hie eyes widened at the sight of her with sheaves of paper. He hurried his pace, hoping she hadn’t actually read the entire thing. It was his fault to have it lying around. He had full intentions to destroy it but time was a fickle friend.
“Jess, what is this?” she asks, her voice grave serious. When he refuses to answer, she shoves the paper onto his face, her eyes demanding an answer.
“Rory - forget it” He takes the papers from her hand, anger rising in his voice. He slouched on the nearby couch, his face buried between his palms. Rory, who was pretty mad now, walked to another corner of the room and placed herself on a dining table chair.
They could feel their senses regaining. They were no longer drunk. The silence and the overthinking had sobered them right up. She finds her legs moving on their own towards where he was sitting. She takes a deep breath, “I have to ask - do you really feel like I would look down on you?”
“I don’t know” He takes a minute to answer. His hands are still on his forehead. His voice sounded tired, which wasn’t surprising as they had been awake all night.
“Because if this is how you think of me - like I am a two-bit materialistic person who would dump you on the news of you not graduating high school, then - “ she has her hands on her hips, eyes glaring at him.
“I don’t think that” he is quick to answer this time. That’s not at all true. Rory wasn’t like that at all - she was, in fact, the opposite. He has a certain vivid imagination of how it would have played out - him actually telling Rory the truth. But he doesn’t like to think of it very much. He truly believes that what he did had to be done and that’s what got him the best life that he was leading today.
He reasons, “It was… nothing. It was just my way of dealing with everything that was going on. Rory, I know you are not that person, I just .. wasn’t thinking right. I thought it would be easier to blame you for...my shortcomings”
“Did it work?”
“For some time” he admits and stands up, directly facing Rory, staring into her eyes “But you have to understand this, Rory. I know I have failed you and Luke many times. You were the only people in this town who gave any crap about me and if I am alive today, I owe it to both of you”
He seemed genuine enough. Part of Rory had already forgiven and forgotten everything between them. It’s just that the story exposed some of her insecurities. She slowly grins, “You were extremely dumb, someone had to look out for you”
He smiles at her in relief as he makes his way to one of his bags to pull out a booklet. He hands it over to her, “Here” She is confused. He continues, “This is something I have been working on”
“Sequel to subsect?” she asks, excited.
“No, something independent” he shrugs, “Lemme know what you think”
She traces the letters on the cover and adores his writing. She opens the next page, the dedication page, and is faced with a surprise.
To that special someone who made me who I am today and also made me fall in love with Ayn Rand
Her heart is racing a thousand beats per minute now. She finds her eyes welling up. Jess has moved to the other end, giving her some privacy to read in peace. Her mind is reciting her list incessantly.
He has to be a gentleman - Well, this was clear. She didn’t need to go through it again and again.
He must be culturally knowledgeable - Was the drunk literary discussion they just had at 2 a.m not enough?
He must be driven and must have his own personal ambition which he strives to achieve - No doubts there, she was staring at his second novel.
He must be attentive to her needs - He noticed that she was upset and cheered her up.
He must be devoted to her and only her - She still needed some clarity on this. This whole month, the whole night seemed like a dream come true. He couldn’t possibly fake everything that was between them. They had almost kissed. There were sparks. There was chemistry. There was this raw tension. She just had to ask him outright what he felt towards her and then she could make an informed decision
He must be romantic - Jess didn’t do extravagant gestures. He didn’t build her a car. He didn’t buy her a thousand dollar bag or a rocket. But what he did was - hold her hands reassuringly when she recounted her fights with Paris, lent her his shoulder when she was upset about her father, boosted her morale constantly when she felt she wasn’t good enough to get into Harvard, became her support system when she was struggling to choose between three schools she had gotten into, looked up the distance between stars hollow and yale when he found out she was going to yale, read self-help books to amend his foiled relationships, paid back luke in full settlement for everything Luke had done for him, gave Rory the much-needed credit for his success in his career as well as his life, snapped her out of the made-up reality she was living when she had dropped out of college.
No, he didn’t give her jewellery or flowers. But what he gave was very meaningful and it laid a strong foundation for their companionship.
He must make her really, truly happy - ...yes
“Jess, this is … amazing” she beams, jumping up and down slightly, holding his book. He had dozed off waiting for her to finish reading. He rubs his eyes, sitting up and trying to gauge where he was. She sits beside him, “I’ve never read anything like this before. I stand by what I said, it doesn’t remind me of anyone. It’s just you. And it’s so much different from your first one”
He could feel his face burning. He had been trying to work on this novel for two years now but no inspiration struck him. It was only when he came to Stars Hollow, words started flowing out of his pen automatically. Maybe it was the small-town charm or the fact that there were no distractions there. Well, there was Rory. But she wasn’t a distraction. She was his muse. His motivation. This was the first time he had felt close to finishing his second book. And the first time he didn’t feel like tearing everything up.
“I like that you’re taking chances” she declares, moving closer to him.
“You know, Gilmore. You’re one of the most important people in my life” he looks at her with a wide grin on his face.
“Yeah?”
“I am glad … of us” he bumps her shoulder with his playfully.
“Really?”
She is finding it harder and harder to maintain her composure. With every word spilling out of his mouth, she is so sure that it was headed the way she wanted it to. Her breathing quickened, she was rubbing her hands in anticipation.
“Yeah. I mean it’s always tough to stay friends with exes - gets very messy” He continues, unmindful of what she might be feeling “It’s good that we got all the awkwardness out of the way”
She is silent. Because this wasn’t what she wanted. He was calling her his friend. Well, they were friends. She would even peg them as best of friends but his tone indicated he didn’t mean it the way she would have.
“Because I would hate to lose you” he is now gazing deep into her eyes, he brings his hand out to hers, entwining their fingers together “You are very precious for that”
“Friend huh?” she titled her head, looking for clarification. Wow, what a colossal fool she had been. A boy was nice to her and she started writing their future together. All of her list was down the water now. She had run in headfirst without even confirming he felt the same way about her. She hung her head low waiting to get hit by that blow of disappointment. And that it did.
“Yep, perhaps give it time we’ll even be best friends. You never know -” he starts, Rory jerks her hand free from his, standing up abruptly. He was taken aback by her sudden movement. He stands up too, looking at her with a look of deepest concern.
She rubs her hand together, speaking as quickly as possible, “I should go”
“Is it something I did… or said?” he asks softly, trying to reach her hand in an attempt to calm her down. But she’s already acquired her coat, holding the doorknob, whispering “No. No. Not you. I just have...a thing. It’s late, I have to go”
She clears out having the final word and leaving Jess Mariano utterly confused.
***
Rory was tossing and turning in her bed all night, replaying that night she assumed to have been going perfectly. Her destructive and self-loathing thoughts were put to an end by a loud thump at her window. She was startled. She quickly got to her feet, getting the nearest book she could as she headed out to her window. She slowly opened it, only to be graced by the surprise presence of Jess.
“Jess, What’re you - it’s 4 am” She sighs, looking at her clock.
“Were you planning on using Vogue to hit an intruder? I am compelled to inform you that this is not a good plan”
“Jess, What’re doing here?” she asked, throwing the magazine on her bed, folding her hands across her chest.
“I found this on the floor of Diner,” he asks, waving her list in front of her face. Her face whitens. She leans in from the window to snatch the sheet back. He holds it high, out of her reach, stressing “What does this mean, Rory?”
“Nothing,” she says defensively.
It has to mean something, you have written my name on it” he threw his hands in the air. It was official. She was the most stupid person on this earth. She could try telling that she meant some other Jess but she was tired. Of lies. Of disappointments. Of heartbreaks. She turns her face away, “I don’t know, okay?”
“And why do you care? You don’t even like me” she is glaring at him, spitting words out of her mouth, scowling.
“What do you mean?”
“You said you didn’t want anything to do with me romantically ” she rolled her eyes. He maintained his confused looks, so Rory dramatically mocks him using a deep voice “‘I am so glad we are friends Rory’, ‘we should be best friends Rory’ - I can take a hint”
He is dumbfounded. He is at an utter loss of words. Before he could even process her information, she is dropping a few more verbal bombs, “So, it’s okay. You have had to bear years of me not choosing you. I think I can survive the taste of my own medicine”
“Rory -” he starts, trying to find the right words. I choose you , he wants to say. But his words are failing his miserably now. He does the only thing he could to diffuse the situation. He leans in, capturing her lips into a kiss. They are kissing each other hungrily trying to make up for all those years they missed. He is kissing her like there’s no tomorrow. He is kissing her like he would perish without her. What he isn't able to express in words and he’s channelling all of that passion into this kiss.
“I don’t -” Rory replies, still dazed by his actions when he backs away.
“It’s you, Rory. It’s always been you” he seems to have found his voice back after getting rid of all that tension. He’s looking at her like she’s the only one to exist in this whole damn world. Like she hung the moon and the stars. Like she shining the light of million suns in that dark night. Like she’s a fucking miracle fallen right out of the sky.
“Are you sure-? You said just friends" she starts to question when he cuts her off “I thought that was what you wanted”
This time, she leans from her window just enough to not get tripped. She grabs him by his jacket lapels and pulls him closer to her. She finds herself tangling her hands in his hair as her lips are meeting his. His hands cup her face softly at the beginning, slowly paving their way to her waist. Their lips weren’t meeting with as much hunger as they did before. This time it was tender. So full of passion. Enough to make a snowman melt in the winter. They were kissing like there was no end.
Looks like the list worked after all.