Work Text:
it's you or me that's made to see
all I do is wait for you
Ranboo sat anxiously at his desk, the light of his monitor bathing him in cool white light. His headphones were on, blasting some song or another while he worked on schoolwork. It was late, he hadn’t meant to put it off for so long, but now it was well past midnight and the sky was dark and the only light in his room came from that damn monitor.
A half-eaten bag of m&m’s sits propped up against a stack of textbooks, some of the multicolored candies spilled out from when he'd grabbed too big a handful and spilled them. The song in his ears was grating, terrible except for the fact that it was helping him stay awake.
three o'clock in the morning still haven't got a call from you
tell me all your stories still in debate if they are true
keep me up and i’m crying forming an ocean in my bed
miserable as i'm trying to keep it cool get you outta my head
“Consider the differential equation f of x...write the equation for the line tangent at the point zero, one…” he mumbled to himself, tapping his pen against the calculus workbook laid out in front of him
“What the fuck,” he groaned. He pushed the headphones off his head, only now realizing just how loud the music had been.
He checked his phone, 2:44 am. The discord window on his monitor still remained dormant, the last message he’d received had been a goodnight message from Tubbo two nights prior.
Ranboo didn’t want to admit it, but that was the reason he was up in the first place. Something about not having heard from him in the last forty-odd hours had put him on edge, unable to sleep. Hell, he’d been so set on distracting himself that he’d edited a full video in one sitting, and then knocked out his online homework for the next three days on top of streaming longer than he usually did. He was worried.
it's you or me that's made to see
all I do is wait for you
so close my eyes and try to stop
to go to bed get outta my head
Ranboo rubbed furiously at his eyes as if that would get rid of the ring of red encircling them. Something about the silence in his room made him on edge, and he quickly replaced his headphones.
i know everything I said was not the best to say
living on your own world was a choice I know you have made
slowly reimagining the times we ran away
never asking questions only wishing that you would stay
Crap. He missed Tubbo. He didn’t know if the boy was okay, he’d been radio silent, not even streaming. Ranboo had even sent a worried message to Tommy, asking if he’d heard anything from Tubbo. All he received in reply was a “he’s fine” that felt a bit too curt and left an unsettling feeling in the pit of Ranboo’s stomach. Had he done something wrong?
The thought hit him like a train. His mind began reeling, thinking of anything, anything, that could’ve made Tubbo mad at him. Had the faux-flirting gone too far? Had he somehow crossed an unknown boundary that made Tubbo uncomfortable? All their interactions up until Tubbo fell off the face of the earth had been normal, he thought. But what if.
Nervously, Ranboo pulled up him and Tubbo’s dms, reading through all their previous messages as if the answer would be written in a message somewhere. Everything seemed...normal. His hands hovered over his keyboard, his brain not quite catching up with his actions. He began typing out a message.
Hey, did I do something wrong?
No, that wasn’t right.
I’m sorry for
Maybe he shouldn’t lead with an apology.
Hope you’re okay. I’m not sure if I did something wrong but if I did I’m really sorry. If you need space that’s cool!!! Take care of yourself :)
Ranboo sent off the message and quickly closed Discord. The purple color of it was making him nauseous at this point.
He focused his attention back on the workbook in front of him, glaring at it like it was the cause of all his troubles. It may very well have been, god knows calculus has never helped anyone. He closed the booklet after a while, deciding that it simply was not worth the effort. Instead, he pulled up a doc of lore plans he’d been working on.
The doc mostly held bulleted notes for ideas on future lore, some more fleshed out than others. Currently, he’d been working on it with Tubbo, wanting to include his character and their interactions into more serious lore. What had started out as a silly bit about them getting married quickly turned into a key element of both of their characters' lore.
it's you or me that's made to see
all I do is wait for you
so close my eyes and try to stop
to go to bed get outta my head
Their in-game relationship was just as important to Ranboo as their real-life one. He wasn’t quick to admit it, but he had been nursing a growing crush for the older boy, one that only strengthened with every 'bit' that involved them acting romantic and intimate just for an audience. It only worsened with the way everyone seemed to talk about their relationship, making art or writing cute little scenarios that blurred the line between platonic and romantic for him.
The sound of a Discord notification startled him from his thoughts. Quickly he checked to find a message from Tubbo.
cna we call plase
Ranboo pressed the call button before his mind could fully register what he was doing. Even after he realized he was calling Tubbo, his brain felt ridiculously slow.
Tubbo picked up on the third ring, his camera on. It was morning for him, but the tired look on his face was evident.
“You look like shit, boss man.”
“Could say the same for you, Tubbo.”
Tubbo let out a nervous laugh “I feel like shit,” he conceded.
Ranboo began to ramble, tripping over his words. “I-I’m sorry. Did I do something? Are you okay? I’m really sorry if I messed up, or if I made you uncomf-”
“No! You’re fine, Ranboo, I just-needed a break.”
“From streaming?”
“From everything. Didn’t mean to freak you out, probably shouldn’t have disappeared like that.”
“It’s ok! Was just worried is all.”
Tubbo hummed in acknowledgment, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. Ranboo stared intently at the boy’s face on his screen.
“I’ve got to tell you something,” Tubbo relented, his voice sounding strained even through Ranboo’s headphones
“Yea! Yea, go ahead.”
“I...like you.”
Ranboo short-circuited at the words, the wringing motion he’d been doing with his hands to calm down stopped entirely, and his face went almost completely blank. Almost.
The silence must’ve freaked Tubbo out, because he immediately tried to backtrack, stuttering out a string of apologies that just made Ranboo’s stomach drop.
“Sorry! Sorry, it-it’s ok if you don’t feel the same way! It won't change anything but canyoupleasejustrejectmerightnowbe-.”
This time it was Ranboo’s turn to cut off the other boy’s rambling, he let out a shaky breath.
“I like you too,” he replied slowly as if every word felt foreign to him.
Tubbo didn’t seem convinced, the worry in his voice even more obvious. “You don’t! have to lie, I can get over it, honest. I’m really sor-”
“Tubbo!” Ranboo interjected. “I like you too, and I’m not lying.”
“I-I-I, what.”
“I like you!” he repeated. He hoped he sounded genuine. “I’ve...had a crush on you for a while, honestly.”
“What the hell Ranboo! A while?”
“Well just since like, December,” he admitted sheepishly.
“DECEMBER? Ranboo, it's May.”
“Yea…?”
Tubbo looked almost angry before he burst into tears.
“What the-hey, heyheyhey, what’s wrong? I’m sorry-”
“Ranboo my beloved you're an idiot. I can’t-I could’ve told you I liked you months ago, we could’ve been dating by now!”
“Date-dating?”
“Yes. I like you. Please.”
Ranboo wanted to cry. Truly and honestly. He would have.
"So like...boyfriends?" he asked tentatively.
"Boyfriends," Tubbo replied, a watery smile on his face.