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Eddie was a coward; plain and simple.
He should’ve broken things off with Ana a while ago, back when Carla made him question his entire relationship. Though instead, he’d brushed it off, making Ana one of his top commitments. Chris seemed pleased with her—they got along great—not to mention his parents were all about it. They constantly asked how things were progressing and so, Eddie made their relationship his sole focus.
Between work, his son, and his relationship with Ana—it didn’t leave him a lot of time for anyone or anything else. He’d been back with the 118 for about a month now since the shooting incident, and everything seemed to have gone back to normal. Sure, he didn’t have as much time to spend with his teammates outside of work, but he was making it all work, right?
Wrong; very, very wrong.
It had been difficult to find a balance with everything, especially concerning his best friend, the one that he hadn’t been intentionally brushing off, but had been doing so anyway. Being around Buck only brought up more questions, ones that he couldn’t even begin to answer, and shouldn’t try to as long as he was making things work with Ana.
He just figured Buck was ok with it, especially now that he’d gotten rid of Taylor for good; he could date whoever he wanted now—Eddie cringed just thinking of the idea.
When he got to work that morning, it was still fairly early, Hen and Chim having yet to arrive while Bobby was in his office going over paperwork, some of B-shift still lingering around. After getting into his uniform, he made his way upstairs, going straight for the pot of coffee, pouring himself a healthy cup. He noted Buck sitting on the couch, seemingly lost in his phone, so he poured the blond a cup, adding just the right amount of cream and sugar he liked; Eddie took his black.
As he approached the couch, the other man stayed as he was, not even looking up as Eddie tired to hand out the cup of coffee. Eddie pushed the cup closer to the blond, adding, “Made it just the way you like, extra sugar and all.” Buck didn’t even glance up, answering somewhat bitterly, not even offering a thanks. “Already had some.” Ok—since when did Buck turn down an extra cup of coffee, especially one Eddie made?
Setting the cup to the table in front of them, he sat down next to Buck, trying to gage his attention once more. “So, what’re we researching today?” Still not looking to him, Buck answered flatly. “How to find a new best friend, one that doesn’t ditch you for their girlfriend.” Whoa, ok; why doesn’t he tell Eddie how he really feels? “What’s that supposed to mean?”
This time, Buck did look to him, furrowing his brows. “You really have to ask?” Eddie sighed, “You act like I replaced you or something. We’re still friends Buck, best friends.” The blond scoffed, “Are we? ‘Cause last time I checked you were too busy to even grab a beer with me, or let me see Chris. Hell, we’re barely even coworkers at this point.”
“That’s not…not true. Look, I just, I have a lot of shit going on. You’d understand if you hadn’t broken up with Taylor.” That had been the wrong thing to say; Eddie knew the minute it’d crossed his mind, but he couldn’t help to let it slip out anyway.
Buck was on his feet now, Eddie standing to match him, the blond pointing a finger at him accusingly. “You didn’t even like her! You were always making stupid faces or rolling your eyes whenever I mentioned her.” That wasn’t—well ok, it was sort of true; Taylor wasn’t right for Buck, and Eddie may or may not have let his distaste for her show a little too outwardly.
“I seem to remember you picking Taylor for your treasure hunt buddy not all that long ago. You didn’t even think to ask me.”
“I did too! And it was Taylor’s idea anyway.”
Eddie shook head while rolling his eyes. “Yea ok. You only asked me after the fact when you felt guilty for not including me.” Buck pointed a finger straight out to him. “There! There’s that stupid face again! I didn’t ask because I knew how you felt about her!”
Eddie ignored his snide comment; he did noy make stupid faces, thank you very much. “Well excuse me for thinking that you deserved better. Taylor was never going to love you, not the way that I-that—she wasn’t right for you, ok?” Buck got even more up in his face then, almost seething. “Well, you know what? Ana isn’t right for you either, but all you care about is pleasing your damn parents! You deserve better…. Chris deserves better.” Now Eddie was heated; it was one thing for Eddie to question his own relationship—but Buck?
“You’ve hardly even been around her! They get along great.” The blond threw his hands out. “When would I have gotten the chance? You’ve completely neglected me—our friendship. It’s like I don’t even have a place in your life anymore. Christopher probably forgot what I look like by now.” Eddie couldn’t help the eyeroll that escaped him. “Dios, you’re dramatic. Chris hasn’t forgotten about you, and neither have I. I’ve just been—busy.”
Buck puffed out a heavy sigh, “Whatever man. If you didn’t want to be my friend anymore you could’ve just said so.” The blond began to stalk off, stopping when Eddie grabbed him at the wrist, turning him around so that they met once more. “Buck, I always want you in my life. I-you’re so much more than just a friend and I-I—” The bell rang out then, Buck yanking his arm away harshly, his words cutting deeper. “Yea, well you have a shitty way of showing it.”
Buck was down the stairs in a flash, Bobby giving him a look of ‘fix it’ as he passed by. Shit. He’d really fucked up this time.
The ride over was awkward to say the least; it was obvious that everyone had overheard their appalling argument, Bobby keeping his eyes trained on the road, Buck ignoring him completely while Hen and Chim gave them both sympathetic looks. He hadn’t meant to put his–whatever he and Buck were on the backburner; he’d just gotten so caught up in things with Ana that he’d inevitably neglected the second person he cared most about in this world, Chris being the first.
When they arrived on scene, there was a bunch of commotion going on, police officers already surrounding the area. Athena stepped over to debrief them, telling them the two men on the roof had been arguing, one trying to get the other down, the former refusing; it wasn’t known how they’d ended up there to begin with.
Bobby looked between them, clearly debating on how to assign roles, especially given his and Bucks’ argument that had taken place not even an hour ago. “Hen and Chim, I want you two to be on ground, ready to go incase this goes south. Buck…Eddie, I need you two on that roof—think you can handle that?” He looked over to Buck who only nodded his affirmation to their Captain. “Copy that Cap.” Eddie gave his own nod, assuring the captain they were good to go; they always worked seamlessly together, no matter what.
They strapped in, Buck looking anywhere but Eddie as he fastened him into the cable, tugging on it to make sure it was secure. “You good?” He expected Buck to give another distasteful comment, though all he offered was a thumbs up; Eddie would take the win.
As they made their way up to the roof of the building, they did so silently, Bobby already having given them the rundown. They were to strap in the most vulnerable one first, talk the man down if they had to, and then strap in the second victim, bringing them both down to safety; easy enough—at least that’s what they’d thought.
When they got onto the roof, the timid one immediately began to panic, throwing out a jumble of words neither of them could understand, the other guy quickly quieting him. They moved forward slowly, announcing their presence and who they were as they went. “I’m firefighter Buckley and this is my—this is firefighter Diaz. We’re here to help. Buck always introduced them as partners; Eddie had even managed to fuck that up.
While Eddie dealt with the seemingly calmer man, Buck tended to the other, coaxing him to be strapped in so they could all get down safely. Eddie heard the unclasping, turning to see that Buck had unclipped himself from the cable, moving to harness the man in. “Buck, what’re you doing?” This wasn’t the way they were supposed to do things. The blond held up the cable, showing how frayed it was; there was no way it would hold both their weights. Looked like the B-team had screwed them over, once again. It was reckless, Eddie knew, but then that was practically Bucks’ middle name.
Eddie nodded to him, “Fine, get him strapped in and I’ll take him down first. You can wait here with him until I get back.” Buck shook his head in agreement, continuing to harness the man in. Eddie turned to grab some of the extra cable from his bag incase they needed it, turning instantly when he heard muffled sounds. Everything happened so quickly; Eddie had no idea what had happened.
One second, Buck was harnessing the guy in, Eddie’s back turned the them. Next thing he knew, the other guy was launching his friend off the roof, shoving Buck off in almost the same instance, making his own getaway as he ran behind them, scaling down the ladder they’d used to get up here to begin with.
“BUCK!”
Eddie dove for the side of the building, throwing his hand over the railing, catching onto Bucks at the last minute. Their gloved hands met, Eddie breathing out a sigh of relief. “I’ve got you Buck. Don’t-don’t let go, ok?” It was a long way down, one that Buck wouldn’t make if he fell. Buck was free-hanging, one hand in Eddie’s, the other reaching out aimlessly, trying to grasp onto anything to stable himself. Bobby’s voice came over the radio, Eddie carefully moving his other hand down to grab onto it. “Diaz, what’s going on up there?”
Clicking the button, Eddie responded as calmly as he could, given the current situation he was in. “B-team left us a shitty cable Cap. Buck had to unharness himself to get the guy strapped in. I dunno what happened with the other guy, he just-he pushed them off.” Bobby’s voice came back over, obviously frustrated at the situation, but glad they were ok for the moment. “Ok, just tell Buck to hang on. We’re trying to get a life net set up now. Hang tight.”
“Copy that Cap.”
Eddie looked down to Buck, a mop of blond curls greeting him; he’d give anything to run his hands through them.
Of course the hand holding Bucks had to be attached to the shoulder that had been injured not long ago; it was fully healed, but it still got achy sometimes, like right now for instance. In order to help stabilize Buck more, and take the weight off his bad arm, he squeezed Bucks’ hand to gain the man’s attention. “Buck, I’m gonna swing you up some, try to grab onto the building with your other hand.” Buck shook his head, “Ok.”
Eddie tightened his grip, using all his muster as he counted out. “On three, ok? One—two—three!” He used all his might, his arm muscles straining with the impact, Bucks body swinging up to meet his, just missing the ledge, his hand falling flat.
“Again!” They tried, and failed, several more times, both of them completely out of breath after. Even with the gloves, their hands were starting to slip apart, Eddie grunting loudly as he tightened his grip, tugging Buck back closer to him. Bucks’ tired voice came up to him, his words stinging Eddie.
“Just let me go Eds, please. Just-just save yourself.” Was he fucking crazy?!
“Buck, I’m not letting go. We’re gonna get you up here one way or another, or we’ll just wait until they get the life net up.”
The blond began begging with him then. “Eds please just-just let me go. You shouldn’t be straining your shoulder like that. Chris needs you.”
Eddie huffed down to him angrily. “Chris needs you too. I need you! Dammit Buck, I told you you weren’t expendable, that you were Chris legal guardian if anything happened to me.”
“That’s why you need to let me go! Chris won’t need me if he has you.” If Eddie could smack the man right now, he would; either that or press their lips so tightly together they both ached after.
“Chris will always need you! I’m sorry I let you down lately. You’re my best friend and I never want anyone to come between us, especially someone who I don’t even want to be with.” Yea, he’d just said that, out loud.
“Don’t tell me what I want to hear Eddie. You love her and that’s fine. Just go be with her…with your family.”
Eddie was becoming exasperated now, his arm starting to burn under the pressure. “I can’t be in love with her when I’m already in love with you! You’re my family Buck, you and Christopher. I don’t need anyone else.”
Glistening blues looked up to meet him, the fear in them evident. “You don’t mean it-you’re-I-I—”
Eddie used his free hand, dragging his body closer to the edge as he reached out for Buck. “Just-just grab onto me, I got you Buck, I promise.”
“I can’t! I-what if you fall with me? Then Chris won’t have anyone! We can’t leave him alone Eds!”
“Do you trust me?” The blond bit at his lip, nodding up to him slightly. “Of course Eds, but-but I should tell you something. That I love, that I’m in-I’m—” Eddie could see the panic taking over, Buck’s mind racing a mile a minute. He willed his best friend to look up at him until brown was holding blue, pleading with the man. “I know, I love you too Evan. Now please, just trust me.”
There was no further argument, Buck swigging himself up at just the right time, Eddie’s hand grasping onto his other, steadying them both. His ears were ringing, but he vaguely heard Bobby’s voice over the radio, looking down to see the net below. Buck looked up to him, squeezing his hands tightly. “I’m never letting go, but we can fall now—together.”
Eddie scooted his body forward, throwing them both off the side of the building, their hands never unlinking. The cable that was still clipped to Eddie helped to stabilize them, Eddie pulling Buck to wrap around him, their bodies pressing close together. Their foreheads came to rest against the other as they continued to drop down, the shared moisture of their tears falling between them. They landed on the mattress with a thud, Eddie instantly disconnecting himself from the cable, though not Buck. Their arms wrapped tightly around each other, even though they were practically numb by this point; it didn’t matter, they had each other.
Bobby cleared his throat after a few minutes, Hen and Chim rushing towards them to check them over. They insisted they go to the hospital to get checked out just in case, the two medics rubbing their arms to get the circulation reflowing.
The hospital was a blur, Buck and Eddie getting separated at some point, much to both their dismay. The doctor cleared Eddie to go after a while, stating his bad arm was still good to go, ushering him to maybe take it easy the next few days just in case though. When he got to the lobby, he was desperately looking for Buck, needing to see for himself that he was ok—alive.
Ana was there instead, looking him over worriedly; he couldn’t pretend for one minute longer, no matter how much of an asshole it might make him look like. He broke up with her right then and there, stating that it just wasn’t working out for him, that he was in love with someone else; it wasn’t easy, but at least he was honest—for once. Oddly, she didn’t seem that surprised, even guessing that it was Buck; wow, he really was an idiot.
She left him to it, inciting that she was glad he was ok before taking off. He immediately went to find his teammates, though they’d apparently gotten another call and had to take off, so he tried the front desk instead. “I’m looking for Buck-I mean Evan Buckley.” The woman behind the counter smiled to him, giving him the room number without too much hassle; whether it was the desperation in his voice or the look on his face, he couldn’t be sure—he was just grateful to have gotten it.
He rounded the corner into the room in quick movements, running smack into someone—his someone.
“Buck.”
The blond smiled up to him, like he had the last time they were in this godforsaken place, melting Eddie’s heart still.
“Hi.”
Eddie smiled back, just as easily. “Hi.”
“You saved me.”
Eddie shrugged casually. “It’s the least I could do after what you did for me.” Memories of the shooting came to mind, his hand reaching out to Bucks’, the last thing he saw being blue; he knew then, had always known—he’d just been too stubborn to admit it.
The blond grinned shyly then. “You uh-you said you loved me.” Eddie nodded, “I did. But more than that.” Buck quirked an eyebrow and Eddie reached absently to smooth it down. “I don’t just love you Buck, I’m in love with you and I’m an idiot for ever trying to make things work with Ana, because it’s you—it’s always been you. And I already broke up with Ana, but if you don’t-”
Warm lips were pressed to his, strong hands wrapping around his waist to pull him in close; he was left more breathless than he’d already been. When they broke apart, Buck was smiling to him softly. “I uh, I’m in love with you too Eds.” Eddie smiled into him, pressing their lips together into another tender kiss, pulling away to whisper, “No more almost dying on each other, ok?” Buck nodded into him, “Ok.”
Eddie placed his hands on either side of Bucks’ face, cradling it in his hands as he spoke earnestly. “Our son needs us, both of us, ok?” Buck pulled in his bottom lip, nodding, tears welling in his eyes once more. “Eds, you can’t-can’t keep saying things like that to me.”
Eddie was the one to raise a brow this time, though he didn’t pull his hands away.
“You know…using my name, calling Chris our son.”
Oh, but he could, and he planned to continue doing so as long as his best friend allowed; now that he had Buck, he was never letting go, not for anything or anyone.
He pulled Buck in for a tight hug, pressing his lips close the blonds ear as he whispered endearingly. “Come on Evan, let’s go home, to our son.”