Chapter Text
The raid had went well. It had been successful, they had succeeded at saving Eri, they had apprehended Kai Chisaki who went by the name Overhaul, they had probably prevented a great catastrophe from happening…
But the win that had come with a few casualties for some, had come with a heavy price for some… a price that was maybe too heavy for them to carry.
Mirio, one of the big three, had ended up losing his powers; most of the heroes and officers that had taken part at the raid had been injured… There had only been one casualty which was seen as a miracle by most of the police officers...
And it should have been a good thing for him too, that there was only one casualty… but Shouta would have wished that there was none...
Because now, Shouta had nothing else to do, other than to blame himself for the death of the green-haired hero. He should have never answered his call and should have waited till the odds were with them… He should have convinced Sir Nighteye to wait till they were stronger, then maybe that casualty wouldn’t have happened…
Maybe then, he wouldn’t need to hold on to his student as he cried the name of the hero, then maybe, he wouldn’t have needed to lie to the red eyed girl through his teeth just so that she didn’t become more unstable...
He shouldn’t have let any of his students join the raid, not after what had happened in the past, not after everything that had happened that year …
With a heavy heart, Shouta swore to himself not to repeat his errors… even though he knew that it wouldn’t change anything…
He took a deep breath as he entered the dorms, his eyes landed on a bandaged-Kirishima who was talking to Bakugou and Ashido, before settling on the self proclaimed Deku-squad…
He sighed.
“Sensei?” Momo’s voice rang through the dorms, making all of them get up from their places and look at him.
He looked at the seven students that were already there before sighing once again.
“Call everyone, to the common rooms…” he stated, and watched as Ashido, Uraraka and Momo left to retrieve the rest of the girls, while Iida and Sero went to retrieve the boys.
His eyes avoided those of Bakugou and Todoroki, who were looking at him with frowns on their faces as if trying to figure out what was wrong.
He was glad that they were in the dorms, since it meant that he could tell the news in one go and just be over with it.
He knew that it was cruel to think about it that way, that he shouldn’t think about it like that but… he was tired, too tired…
“Kacchan! You don’t have to leave today?” asked the teasing voice of Kaminari, making Shouta’s heart ache.
His eyes fell on every single one of his students, his kids that he had come to call his own and he found himself promising to protect them, to not let anyone meet the fate of the dark-haired hero.
He sighed once again as the class made small chatter. He didn’t silence them, he couldn’t find it in him to do so…
“Everyone! It is inexcusable to behave like this infront of Sensei!” Iida stated, his hands chopping up and down as he did so. It worked, however, and everyone fell silent.
Shouta opened his mouth, trying to muster all of his energy to force the news out of his mouth, till Iida and Kirishima raised their hands up at the same time.
He thanked Kami for granting him more time, and nodded towards Iida.
“Sensei,” Iida began, before fixing his glasses, “wouldn’t it be better for Midoriya to be here too if that is so important?”
“Why would that Nerd need to be here?!” Bakugou argued with a scoff.
“Iida-san,” Yaoyorozu’s quiet voice began to say, silencing the two, “it is disrespectful to ask this when all of us have already been gathered here…”
For a moment, Shouta had no idea what to do.
He didn’t know how to take care of this, their Aizawa Sensei, the person that they needed to depend on at that moment, had never been through something like this… He was used to expelling students, but not used to having one of them forcefully torn away from him… Aizawa Shouta was not used to the death of a child, a kid who had so much potential...
But Eraserhead was used to it, his alter ego had seen too many of death’s to count, both the death of those that he had been supposed to protect, and those that he had grown to call his comrades...
So he let his mask slip on his face, covering his heart with a blanket as he forced it to turn into stone for the moment. He felt like a coward running away from his problems, but he kept his mask on, because at that moment, that was all that he wanted to do...
Shouta only watched as Iida apologized and Kirishima raised his hand.
He motioned to him, and watched as the red-head opened his mouth, “Sensei, when is Midoriya coming back to the dorms? I heard that he had overexerted his quirk a bit too much and that he needed to undergo surgery…”
Uraraka bolted up at that, her eyes open like gems as she looked at Kirishima, “I thought that he wasn’t hurt that badly!” she stated, and Eraserhead sighed.
“Izuku Midoriya won’t be returning back…” he stated, and watched as all of his students looked at him with unbelieving eyes.
“W-what?” Uraraka asked before Bakugou bolted up from his place on the couch..
“What the hell did that damn Deku do?! How the hell did he push far enough to be expelled-”
Not having the heart to keep on going, Eraserhead raised his hand, silencing all of the kids.
They were all children, they shouldn’t have needed to take on their fight this early, they shouldn’t have needed to have this much agony at this age- they were supposed to goof around, they were supposed to live !..
“Midoriya’s operation was unsuccessful, he passed away yesterday 3 hours after the raid. I expect that-”
He didn’t get to finish his sentence. He hadn’t expected to be allowed to finish it, because that would have been too merciful for him…
“N-no…” Uraraka uttered out, stuttering while her shaking eyes never left his, “I- I had seen him, he was Okay, he was Okay!” she cried out, her voice becoming even louder as she kept on repeating those words like a broken record…
He looked at all of them, and his eyes stopping only after settling on Bakugou’s unbelieving eyes, “Does Aunty know?” he choked out, and Shouta- no Eraserhead gave a stiff nod.
“Yes, she left for the states this morning after learning about the news.”
Silence filled the room, making him release a miserable sigh for the millionth time in the last two days.
He looked down, his mind wandering off to the notes that Izuku had left him, notes that must have taken years for the problem child to collect…
“The Midoriya’s, Izuku Midoriya’s mother and father, had decided to throw everything that belonged to Midoriya away, not wanting any reminder of him… but I was able to push back the days till next month, so those of you who want to can come with me and look at anything that you might want as…” Eraserhead trailed off, not wanting to finish his sentence.
He refused to use the word ‘souvenier’ because that would be unfair, to both the Problem Child and his friends that had been left behind.
He turned around with a grimace, and let out a deep breath.
Eraserhead walked to the doors, doing his best to keep a straight face, doing his best to hold on till he reached his and Mic’s room, but stopped when he heard a sniffle come from one of his kids.
‘’I’m sorry…’’ he whispered, and bolted out.
He guessed that it was to be expected, as the problem child had always had a way of bringing out the man that he had carefully hid inside of him.
He wasn’t sure how long it had been, well, he wasn’t sure about anything when he thought about it. He couldn’t remember anything outside of the box-like room, outside of the white walls that surrounded him.
Eri…
That was all he could remember.
The memory of someone with white hair, red eyes... that faded as time went on.
And nothing more than that.
He didn’t know his name, he didn’t know why he was here, he wasn’t even sure of how long he had been there…
Eri…
In the white box, that separated him from the outside, with nothing except a tray that got filled every now and then, he clung on to the memory.
Sometimes, he thought that it was wrong, that things weren’t supposed to be like that.
He thought that the floor that he slept on was too rough and it wasn’t supposed to be like that, that the unpleasant buzz that the ‘food’ left in his mouth was not okay…
His whole world was not *normal*.
And he had a feeling, that there was something missing, that a part of his memories were gone...
But who was he to know?
After all, he had nothing and nothing at all.
Not a name, which he believed that he was supposed to have, since the smaller white-haired existence had one…
Not a recollection of anything other than Eri, which he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to have it…But he was glad that he did... Because it meant that there were others like him, and this white room was not all that there was to existence… that there was something outside of these white walls that surrounded him…
So the dark-curly haired, scarred boy clung to the only thing that he had, the memory of the little existence as if it was a blanket… feeling like it was the only thing that kept him sane…