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It had started when he realized he didn’t remember going to the Spirit World.
All he had were glimpses, vague ideas. He had gone to the spirit world with his friends to save Tide. They had encountered a carnival and fought the Groundskeeper, but he couldn’t remember the details of the fight. He only knew what had happened afterwards by hearing it in passing, and it confused him to no end.
“Yeah, Vyncent had a gun. Two guns, actually, just appeared out of thin air.” It felt as though he remembered it in third person, like he wasn’t really there.
“We fought this smoke guy, and he gave me a sword!” Sure, he knew the major points, but not the details. Spirit world, something with Mal, then they were back.
“Tide was in… pieces, really. It was really morbid.” Surely he would remember something like that. Why didn’t any of these memories feel like his own?
'Cause they’re not, something spoke in the back of his mind. Vyncent was shocked when he wasn’t frightened by the presence. The voice was familiar somehow and warm like a cup of apple cider.
'I don’t understand,’ he thought back. He had no clue if the presence would be able to hear him, too, but he could hope.
The voice chuckled warmly. I didn’t expect you to, Virion. Think on it some more for me, will ya, kid?
Vyncent sat on his bed, now more confused than when he started, and sighed. He had research to do.
“William, what am I like when I’m the gunslinger?”
William turned away from the cabinet to face Vyncent. “That’s kind of a weird question.”
“I know, but just...” the elf sighed, swirling his hand in the air as he took a seat, “humor me, please?”
William nodded, continuing to unload the dishwasher as he was before. “Okay, so uhh… well, honestly, you act like a totally different person. Different accent, different way of talking, I guess.” Something in the back of Vyncent’s mind lit up, but he pushed it back. Not now.
“Yeah? What else?”
William slid a plate onto a shelf. “Honestly, there’s this one bit that kinda stuck out to me, not about the gunslinger though -- it was with the mage.”
Vyncent’s ears perked up. He had somehow almost forgotten that day, as if it had barely affected him. “What bit was it?”
The boy sighed, as though he was trying to fit words to ideas. “When you were... the mage, at one point, you came over and said something like… ‘pleasure to meet you, Virion’s told me good things,’ and I was kinda shaken up by the whole base-burning-down thing so I didn’t really pay any attention to it at the time, but...” William trailed off, losing his momentum. “...I thought you would want to know that.”
Vyncent nodded, trying to organize this new information in a way he could understand it. When the mage was out, they introduced themself, but I don’t remember introducing myself. Why would I introduce myself? We’d been living in HQ for at least two weeks at that point, right?
He took a deep breath, trying to make more sense of what “he” had done, when a different energy surfaced, and a thought came to his mind:
Who on Prime said you were the mage, Virion?
He stopped. ‘ What is that even supposed to mean?’
The response was playful, almost teasing. I’m sure you’ll know soon enough, but I’m interrupting something. Get back to it!
“Are you okay, man?” William’s voice snapped Vyncent out of his thoughts.
He shook his head, hoping it would shake the other thoughts with it. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just sorta tired, I guess.”
William nodded, obviously skeptical. “If you ever want to talk to me about anything, I’m open,” he offered.
“Nah, I’m fine,” Vyncent reassured him. “Just making sure I remember everything.”
“If you’re sure,” William mumbled back, returning to his everyday chores.
“Hey Vyncent!” The squeak of rubber shoes on linoleum floor announced Dakota’s presence. “You doing okay?”
Vyncent paused, and genuinely considered the question. “Kind of a loaded question right now.”
Dakota’s face turned into a curious scowl. “If you have to think about it that hard, that probably means ‘not good.’” He jogged over to the bleachers on the side of the gym and patted the space next to him. “Come on! Talk to me.”
A pause. “Okay, sure.”
A massive grin spread across the redhead’s face. “Alright! Tell me, Vyncent, what’s on your mind?”
He sighed, plopping himself down onto the bleachers. “I’ve just been really confused recently.”
Dakota tilted his head curiously. “About what?”
“I was thinking about it, and I realized that I never remember being in my other forms.”
Dakota propped his chin up with a fist, thinking intently. “Huh.”
Vyncent continued. “And when I talked to William about it, he said that when I was the mage, I introduced myself to you guys as if I didn’t know you, but I don’t remember any of that.”
“Oh yeah!” Dakota grinned. “I remember that! Honestly, I kinda forgot that it was you, it was kinda like talking to a whole new person.”
The elf nodded. “That’s the thing though, I think it is.”
“You really think so?”
Vyncent’s heart tightened. “I’m not entirely sure, but--”
“That just means more teammates!” Dakota interrupted him with a firm pat on the back. “I’m glad you told me, Vyncent! I gotta get back to training now, but remember that I’m super proud of you all the time!”
Vyncent could only stare in dumbfounded shock as Dakota sprinted off somewhere else. What had just happened?
“Hey Ashe, you know stuff about spirits, right?”
The boy took off his headphones and turned to face Vyncent. “I mean, yeah, kinda. Why do you ask?”
Vyncent took a deep breath. “Do you know anything about multiple… ‘spirits,’ I guess, in one body?” He barely paused before rambling on. “Like possession, but it’s not... they’re nice, and also you forget stuff?”
Ashe looked at him for a second then shrugged. “I’m not a professional, but that sounds like a system.”
He stared back. “What?”
“Kinda like…” Ashe trailed off, then reached for a book from the nearby shelf. He started flipping through the pages intently, then stopped. He grabbed the piece of looseleaf that was nestled between the chapters and handed it to Vyncent. “Here, I took a psychology class a while back and kept some of my notes.”
The top of the page read Dissociative Disorders in big, bold letters, and Vyncent noted the care put into each handwritten letter.
“You can keep that,” Ashe nodded. “I think you’ll need those more than me, anyways.”
“Thanks,” Vyncent mumbled, lost in the meaning of the words. It all resonated with him -- the lost time, the forgetfulness, the shift in attitudes. There was a name to put to his experiences, and he felt a tightness in his chest. ‘I think this is it.’
The warm thoughts from before returned with a chuckle, and Vyncent felt a grin subconsciously spread across his face. Well, it sure does seem like it. I’m glad you thought on it.
“Listen,” Ashe said, startling Vyncent from his thoughts. “If it helps, you can always talk to me. I’m all ears.”
Vyncent smiled. “Yeah, I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Hey Tide, are you free?”
Tide turned away from his pot of stroganoff and grinned. “Vyncent! Yes, of course, what do you need?”
He took a deep breath. “So, um, this might sound kinda weird, but just… stick with me, okay?”
“Vyncent, you know I always have your back. It’s my job, and my honor to protect you, and nothing could ever change that fact.” Tide grasped Vyncent’s shoulder and smiled softly. “Anything that any of you need, come to me and I’ll have it done, just as always.”
Vyncent felt his heart pound in his chest. “So I’m pretty sure each of my classes is a whole different person. I kinda thought about it for a while, and I was thinking about how I don’t really remember much of the Spirit Realm--”
“Oh, I already knew that,” Tide grinned.
Vyncent’s face fell in shock. “You did?”
“Yes, I thought you would… well, no, it makes sense that you wouldn’t remember,” Tide muttered to himself. “The gunslinger, I believe he introduced himself to me as Gabriel, told me a bit about his situation regarding your powers a few days ago.”
Vyncent blinked. “Huh.”
“No matter, Vyncent,” Tide nodded. “It must have taken a great deal of courage to come to me with that, and I’m so incredibly proud of you. I will always be proud of you, all of you. Thank you so much for telling me.”
“Yeah, uh…” Vyncent found himself lost in thought once more. “...no problem.”
Vyncent could barely believe what lay before him.
He had opened to the most recently filled page of his journal, intending to write down what he had done that day, when he saw a note he didn’t write himself.
The handwriting was full of loops and pizazz, and the person who had written it had gone out of their way to find a pen with pink ink.
Get some more interesting outfits! Love, Merlin
He had read over Ashe’s notes several times now, so he knew that it was possible for other alters to do things without him knowing, but seeing physical proof of it cemented it in his mind -- he was right, and he wasn’t sure how to feel.
You alright, son? Gabriel asked, becoming coconscious in a way that felt like poking his head through Vyncent’s door.
‘I don’t know, it just…’ Vyncent blinked, collecting his ideas. ‘...it feels more real now, in a way.’
In his mind’s eye, Vyncent saw Gabriel give him a pat on the back. I know big changes like this can be difficult, but at least now you know why you forget all that stuff, right?
I guess so,’ Vyncent nodded. ‘Thanks, Gabriel.’
Don’t sweat it, kid, we gotcha.
About a week later, Vyncent found himself standing in front of a handcuffed Le Frog with the Prime Defenders by his side and no memory of how he had gotten there.
“Oh, hey again, Vyncent,” William grinned. “You doing okay?”
He took a quick glance around his surroundings, then nodded. “I think so, just sorta confused.”
Ashe hummed knowingly. “Don’t worry about it, Merlin just helped us fight Le Frog. He was trying to burn a house down to collect the insurance on it, or… something. It’s hard to tell with him.”
That would be me, the playful voice from before called out to him -- the mage. You’re welcome, by the way!
“Dude, they kicked major ass!” Dakota beamed. “I’ll have to tell you all about it once we get back to the base!”
Vyncent smiled. “I guess you will!”