Chapter Text
Even as a five year old it was not difficult for Kakashi to figure out that there was really no one who was going to help him with this. He was the last remaining member of his clan and most of other adults Kakashi knew have given that bad look to his father since the day otou-san came home all bloody and sad. He had told Kakashi that he had failed a mission but saved friends.
It’s not until later that both Kakashi and his Otou-san realised that he had failed both his mission and his friendships. Along with the trust of his Hokage and the village.
So yeah, even though Kakashi knew the Hokage to be kind and generous he couldn’t approach the village’s king for something so menial and beneath his status and Shinobi code. To help a traitor was similar to being one.
He’ll have to forego crying for some other day some other time. Besides crying all alone just makes him feel more empty and alone. Kakashi knows because he had cried and rallied at his father’s corpse for 50 hours straight before the burning in his eyes and his nose and the lack of clean breathable air had driven him outside.
Nobody had bothered to check on either him or his father in that duration. Kakashi had been too numb and too young to know what had to be done so he had gone to the academy seeing it’s the only place where he knew people existed and were forced to acknowledge his presence.
He entered his class with his head down wanting to talk to someone about the ugly mess sitting behind his chest but unable to voice anything. He sat at his usual place, alone and isolated from all others.
When Sensei arrived he took a look at Kakashi and asked in that harsh tone kakashi had gotten so used to in recent months,
“ Hey runt, do you think Academy’s too above your standards now? Or is your father educating you in some other ‘sklls’?
Kakashi listening his father mentioned turned his head towards sensei and said not really feeling anything, “ Otou-san died”
There was silence for a bit before the class of little children was overtaken by chatter..
“ isn’t his father the white fang?”
“ my father says he’s responsible for the war”
“ Is kakashi feeling okay?”
“ when did it happen?”
“ how can someone kill the white fang?”
Kakashi hears all but all he focuses on is that softly spoken inquiry about his own feelings because he himself doesn’t know the answer to that.
“Kakashi come with me will you?”
Kakashi gives a nod and follows his sensei outside and without a word spoken between the two towards the teacher’s lounge area. He asks kakashi to stay outside for a bit and enters the room.
The ringing silence following his sensei’s exit is broken by harsh whispering a few minutes later,
“ I want to say good riddance but their’s his kid in my class and he doesn’t look too well.”
“ why haven’t we heard about this? If the kid was informed 2 days back since that’s the time of his absence from academy then we should have been informed before!”
“ wasn’t he relieved from duty?”
More ringing silence.
More whispers.
Sensei’s hand is on his shoulder which brings Kakashi back from the dark void that’s been starting to consume him at occasional moments. He hears a grudgingly soft,
“ Listen Kakashi-kun, were you informed about your father or did you find him yourself?”
Kakashi looks into his sensei’s eyes but there’s nothing in them other than pity so he turns his head down and replies softly, “ I am sorry sensei I don’t know who to inform. He’s at home”
“ when did you find him Kakashi-kun?”
“Hmm…I think if I have missed the academy for 2 days then 2 days ago”
“Alright alright. Hmm…don’t worry about telling someone I’ll take care of that.” Kakashi nods his head in gratitude. He doesn’t know what HE has to do here?
The teacher awkwardly pats his student’s shoulder not knowing how to comfort a child whose father killed himself because the village demanded his life as compensation.
“ Hmmm, Kakashi-kun do you have anyone else you’d like to contact? (Kakashi shook his head in no) alright that’s ok.hmmm..”
“Will they come to collect his body?”
“Oh…ah…yeah right, they will. Hmm…would you like to be there for that?”
Kakashi thought about it but couldn’t figure out what he wanted right now? Would his father want him to be there? Would they treat his body right if kakashi is not there? He has to be there to protect his father.
“ yes”
“Ok..hmm…can you go alone? Or do you want someone with you?”
Kakashi doesn’t think anybody would want to be saddled with him so he shook his head and after nodding in his teachers direction left the academy heading to his home.
When he reached home 2 ANBU were already there and sealing his father’s body in a scroll. They saw Kakashi and looked at each other before offering to take him to the hospital as well.
For the day Kakashi stayed at the hospital bench lost in the dark void, nothing and nowhere to escape for him. The hospital either didn’t have the heart to remove a child from his vigil or they didn’t have one to forgive a child for his father’s mistakes.
So kakashi stayed for another day. Neither the ANBU returned nor his father.
Kakashi sitting there on the bench all alone, laid out a plan like he did for most tasks. He was alone and even though smart for his age his physical strength wasn’t at par to handle some tasks. Like digging a grave big enough for Otou-san. He could pay someone to do the same without telling them a reason and he could then use the earth jutsu his father taught him for cleaning out the edges. Kakashi knew where his mother was buried so the site for his fathers burial was not a big decision to make.
He’ll also have to buy some flowers for his father. That would be the funeral he guessed.
Was there someone he had to inform or invite?
He was more than satisfied to bury his father all by himself but may be his father would be disappointed with only Kakashi being there or miss someone?
Was there anyone in the village who was still a friend? There was once a guy with big mane of white hair, not like theirs but purer. Kakashi liked to think himself as silver haired.
Should he ask Gai and his father?
Although Kakashi wasn’t sure if Gai would be interested in such an activity? Wasn’t dying a vulnerability? Gai is always talking about challenges, may be Kakashi could pose it as a challenge. How long would they be able to sit silently by his fathers grave.
That could work. However Kakashi suspected that whoever participated in a traitors funeral would not be able to lead an easy life in the village especially during these times when war was so close and everybody was more than ready to place the burden of it on Kakashi’s father.
Another day passed and Kakashi has essentially been an orphan for 4 days, hungry for the same duration and sleepless for whatever the hours.
There was so much to think about. He would have to fill forms regarding the house’s ownership, he was now a clan head and then he had to settle the matter of funds with the council. There would be bills to take care of and taxes to pay.
He’ll also have to graduate from the academy faster now and then become a genin and then chunin and start earning. Even though they had always been quite judicious with their funds Kakashi’s father was not very wealthy. He didn’t think the funds would hold for much longer and kakashi didn’t want the council to decide what funds to give to the child of a disgraced Shinobi. He won’t accept help from people who would curse his father in the same breath as they wished him well.
Since the times are heading towards war once again there is no age limit for graduation at the academy so kakashi thinks that’ll be fine.
He has always wanted to serve Konoha and now that his father’s a disgraced shinobi that want has transformed into an all consuming need. He won’t let his name down!
By the time kakashi’s figured out his situation and has made a plan of action he finally sees the two ANBU who had come to collect his father’s body, come out of the coroner’s office where they had taken the body and given a lift to kakashi.
Kakashi hadn’t taken into account his father’s status as a disgraced Shinobi and the presence of ANBU here. He might not need to do the bit about the funeral at all. Hmmm, he’ll have to change his budget calculations as well.
One of the ANBU even with bird mask looks entirely shocked to see Kakashi there. Where did they expect him to exactly go?
The ANBU came near him and one of them wearing a mask of what looked like to be a bear addressed Kakashi,
“ hey you! You are the Traitor’s son right? You can leave, we won’t be releasing his body anytime soon.”
The bear guy makes shooing motions but Kakashi feels something in his small chest tighten up and he can’t do anything. It’s difficult to think and even harder to follow orders which state that he won’t be getting his father’s body after all. Kakashi always forgets to take his emotions into account.
It’s getting difficult to breathe in here.
The other guy harshly nudges the bear guy with his elbow and even though Kakashi can’t see their faces he can guess that the bear guy must be scowling in the other guys direction.
Can Kakashi at least see his father the last time? He doesn’t ask. He knows the slurs would make it past his walls right now, they are not something he wants to deal with yet.
The other guy comes forward who Kakashi now realises is the one wearing a bird sort of a mask an can’t control his emotions well and kneels down in front of Kakashi. And even though Kakashi doesn’t like to be treated like a little child he likes that the guy is talking with him at his level and not making him look up into face less voices.
“ hey kid, sorry about this guy. He’s grumpy when he hasn’t had his beauty sleep.” He was clearly expecting Kakashi to smile at that but Kakashi’s always been good at disappointing well meaning adults. Bird guy gives a look to the bear guy and continues after turning towards Kakashi, his tone soft and soothing,
“ I am really sorry about your father kid, Kakashi right? I have been on missions with him before and he was an exceptional Shinobi”
It’s the first time in Kakashi’s admittedly short life that someone is clearly acknowledging and commenting another shinobi as exceptional, Kakashi thinks its really weird because he doesn’t want to think about how he feels all warm and cold and like he’s going to cry at the spot if this man keeps talking in that wonderfully soothing voice.
It’s disturbing. Kakashi is NOT a child and he certainly is not weak!
In lieu of an answer Kakashi manages to narrow his eyes at the man without having a single tear slide down his eyes.
“You know I can take you home? Or is there someone or somewhere else you’d like to…”
MINATO!
Kakashi is good at reading body language, it comes with the territory of being excellent at all kinds of senses, just a touch behind being a sensor type ninja. He’s nowhere near good as his father but with the slight twitching in the man’s shoulder in front of him he can easily guess that this is MINATO.
Namikaze Minato.
The guy is not so famous so as to be known by every pre-genin but he with his teleportation jutsu is famous enough to inspire awe in children. Which Kakashi is not.
The guy who called an ANBU by his name is striding towards them with long purposeful steps. The guy’s eyes are glancing around him and sometimes Kakashi observes that they get Stuck on nurses milling about the area. The guy is a pervert. Kakashi scowls in the new guys direction
Kakashi also observes that the guy has long purely white mane of hair. Is this the guy Kakashi remembers having seen all that long ago?
The older guy comes forward and after seeing Kakashi staring and scowling at him openly he narrows his eyes down at Kakashi. It’s a wrong move since Kakashi feels challenged and only doubles the intensity of his scowling.
The guy apparently is amused by this reaction and turns to the guy standing in front of Kakashi and declares,
“ Who’s the brat Minato? Didn’t I specifically give you the talk so that mistakes couldn’t be made?”
And the guy has no tact whatsoever. Kakashi can feel the cringe from the bird guy and even the rude guy from earlier seems to be laughing.
Minato-san hisses at the man but says cordially none the less, “ Jiraiya sensei. ANBU masks do have purposes you know ( the Jiraiya guy shrugs like it doesn’t really matter that he gave away the identity of an ANBU operative). And please refrain from shouting embarrassing things in the hospital. Or anywhere. This is Kakashi. Hatake Kakashi.”
Kakashi now scowls towards Minato because he’s not a child! He can introduce himself if he likes to!
Jiraiya-san’s focus which had been shifting from one point to another too quickly for Kakashi to follow suddenly focused solely on Kakashi. Its’ unnerving to say the least, the guy has a lot of marking on his face and they make Kakashi uncomfortable because he can sense they are not just for fashion.
Jiraiya-san keeps looking at Kakashi for a bit and then whispers, his voice soft yet somehow very authoritative, “ Hatake hunh, You are Sakumo’s boy?”
Kakashi braces his shoulders for the onslaught of disgust, distrust and hate which he’s become so used to stand against even when his father was alive. He just gives a nod, not even bothering to show the amount of respect that a shinobi of Jiraiya’s stature might deserve.
Jiraiya-san apparently sensing the defensive stance Kakashi has taken backs himself up feeling shocked and says confidently, “ I am not going to hurt you Kid. ( very softly) Sakumo was a dear friend of mine. (Smilingly) you have grown about 3 feet since the last I saw you.”
Kakashi is still silent though. He hasn’t ever been much for talking and interacting, he observes things and figures out the most potent course of action.
Jiraiya giving up on the kid ever saying anything for himself turns to Minato for help who’s also focused on the kid in their presence. He scowls at that mask which doesn’t let him gauge his student’s reactions, he says irritatedly,
“ Minato take that blasted thing off! I told you you were not to join ANBU!”
Minato-san turns towards his sensei and Kakashi can feel him controlling his anger or indignant feeling, “ Jiraiya-sensei with all due respect it’s my own choice. And you were not there remember?”
Jiraiya-san grimaces at the dig but still doesn’t let up, “ And I am here now. Take that thing off Minato! It’s not meant for you”
The other guy buts in between the two saying “ you can’t just!” But he is quickly shushed by the other two.
Minato keeps looking at the older guy and he must see something he agrees with or understands and takes his mask off. The shock of yellow messy hair isn’t new but on the pale face it’s practically like seeing a sun. Kakashi stares openly at him.
Minato offers his sensei a glare and then turns towards the silent kid once again. Is the kid mute? Or is it something related to the trauma of loosing his father? Is he vocally challenged?
Seeing the kid staring at him Minato gives him a small smile and waves his hand with a “ hi, kid. I suppose its easier to deal with adults who don’t wear masks isn’t it?”
The kid is as silent as before and Minato is beginning to wonder whether the kid is even understanding anything or not. It hurts Minato’s heart to think about the way his ANBU partner had been treating the little boy who just lost his father, traitor or not.
“ sakumo’s kid hunh, I suppose you don’t understand what’s going on kid but your dumb father practically betrayed the village and ‘started a war’ when he decided to save some dumbasses”
“ SENSEI!”
Kakashi had thought the Jiraiya guy to be a friend but apparently not. And to think he had let his guard down earlier just because the guy hadn’t been cruel from the get go. Kakashi needs to work more to better his body language reading techniques straightened.
He squares up his shoulders and scowls defiantly in Jiraiya’s direction.
“ what? It’s true. If he hadn’t bothered to save some so called friends nobody would be calling him a traitor and his son wouldn’t be standing all alone with 3 practical strangers trying to brace himself against the hatred he’s witnessed till now and expects to be bestowed upon him since his father killed himself .”
The sentence had gotten more heated by the end but somehow left Kakashi confused whether the guy was supporting his father or insulting him?
He tilted his head in confusion unconsciously.
Minato and jiraiya’s eyes immediately focused in his direction and their faces turned what Kakashi could only classify as soft and Kakashi felt his face grow heated and he resisted the urge of scuffing his sandals on the floor like some little kid!
Minato and Jiraiya glanced at each other and then back at the ANBU person who was still standing there, Jiraiya dismissed him and he must have been someone of higher clearance because the ANBU grudgingly nodded and left.
Jiraiya came forward and sat beside Kakashi and even though Kakashi had been standing to greet the ANBU, Jiraiya’s still taller than him. He asks in a soft voice…
“ is there someone you can stay with for a few days kid? ANBU will most likely seal your place for the time being”
Kakashi just shook his head. He’s the last member of his clan, his father’s former friends have all labelled him as a traitor and he has no friends.
Minato frowns at the little child and asks finally, “ Are you able to hear and speak kakashi-kun?”
Kakashi looks up at him and gives a slow nod. Minato sighs in understanding,
“ alright Kakashi-kun, its ok. You can take your time”
“ the council usually takes care of kids like yourself. Well, they dump you on any available doors doorstep and offer them money to take care of you like a day care for pets.”
Kakashi is unable to hide his scare of that idea well aware how he’ll be treated by a common man in konoha. Minato glares at his sensei for his bluntness and tries to reassure Kakashi,
“ it’s really not like that Kakashi-kun. But yeah you have limited options here, you are in the academy right? (Kakashi gives a nod) well they’ll probably try to place you with a shinobi family, may be even a clan but its all really difficult to say now because of your…hmmm situation.”
Kakashi does nothing for a bit and Minato winces thinking his rambling must have confused the child even more. And he is just a little child, five or six at maximum since he’s at the academy however doesn’t look much above four. Minato’s heart clenches again for the child facing hate and discrimination along with the trauma of having found his father after he committed suicide.
“ I can get graduated from the academy early, it’s no big deal and I can get an apartment for the time it takes ANBU-sans to hmm…to…” the kid’s voice is very soft and childlike and Minato suppressed an AWE barely.
Graduate from the academy? How old is this kid really? He looks at Jiraiya-sensei who’s eyeing the kid in so much sadness that Minato averts his gaze immediately to provide some privacy to his sensei’s emotions.
The kid clenches his teeth somehow managing to get his lip stuck in between them. Minato winces able to see the outline of kids teeth and wants to free the poor abused lip but he satisfies himself by saying in the kindest tone he can… “ investigate, yes. But kakashi-kun you don’t have an appointed guardian and the council won’t allow you to live alone. And graduate from the academy? How old are you Kakashi kun? You’ll just end up at an orphanage which are run by council and some volunteers.”
Minato doubts what he is saying would hold true in Kakashi’s case though. The council would just want to get it’s hands rid of the traitor’s child and if Kakashi shows any indication that Kakashi could live alone then they would jump at the idea to avoid any conflict in Konoha citizens. No matter the Kid’s age.
It’s all so messed up that it boils Minato’s blood. Blaming a little child for their father’s deed is as traitorous in Minato’s eyes as was Sakumo’s decision.
Well, Minato thinks looking at the child in front of him, he’ll accept he’s a shallow man for thinking that Sakumo brought on war upon Konoha’s door-step but he also accepts he couldn’t have been the soul reason for it and anybody saving their comrades from certain death is a good man in Minato’s eyes. Traitor or not.
“ would you like to stay with me kid?”
Jiraiya-sensei never ceases to amaze Minato. He knows he’s openly gawking at his teacher but he has no other thought at this moment. Jiraiya sensei wants to what? Adopt the kid? Be his guardian? Doesn’t he know what kind of hell he’ll be bringing on himself if he does this?What about his frequent research ventures outside of konoha? Minato is surprised, awed and irritated to say the least.
Kakashi is looking towards jiraiya sensei with the same considering look he’s been giving everyone. The kid is too still and silent for Minato’s comfort but Jiraiya seems to be handling it with patience.
“ You do know my father don’t you? I think you used to be friends, you have very unique hair, I remember.”
Jiraiya nods and replies in that same tone that whenever used has always made Minato feel safe, “ Yes, I did know your father. I am sorry I wasn’t here for him”
Kakashi tilts his head in that same puppy like manner showing his confusion freely now, he asks after realising Jiraiya wouldn’t say anything until asked directly, “ Why are you sorry? He’s the one who betrayed his village and he had to face the consequences. It’s his fault he couldn’t.”
Minato almost backs up from the small child, the bluntness of the statement towards his own father too hard to bear for the newly initiated ANBU who hadn’t been on more than 1 mission yet.
Jiraiya however gives him a stay sign silently when Kakashi turns to him, the kid has very sharp senses.
“ Kakashi, you may think like that because you have learned the Shinobi rule book by heart only recently, but remember that your comrades if you do have a choice would always come first”
“ otou-san said the same thing. I don’t understand. It’s not written”
“ I promise you’ll understand as you get older Kit”
Kakashi glowers at Jiraiya sensei and if Minato can see right, the kid has very sharp canines, almost like fangs descending. Is that why he wears a mask?
Jiraiya however laughs loudly returning to his boisterous self and ruffles the kid’s silver white hair so much like his own affectionately. The little child almost nuzzles into the touch before remembering himself and backs off.
Jiraiya is undeterred though so he continues to rub the kid’s head.
Kakashi wants to scowl and glower at the audacity of the older man to dare to touch him like this but the older man is persistent and his head rubs are just so comforting with the perfect ratio of soft and firm and occasional scratches. Kakashi’s starting to feel drowsy now but he has so much to do! It’s been so long since someone’s shown him some form of affection. Father hadn’t touched him for almost a month before he died.
“ what do you say kit? Would you like to stay with me?” He continues to give the best head rubs ever.
Kakashi thinks that may be he could take a nap before getting back to all the work he has. The are making him feel all warm and sleepy. Is this some kind of jutsu? May be Jiraiya-san would teach him and then whenever Kakashi would feel alone he could perform the jutsu himself?
“ not a kit!” That is all he manages to protest about that statement and even though Jiraiya-san’s eventual laugh is humiliating, his answer makes up for it.
“ Alright pup, I’ll take care of you”
The sleepless nights, the worry, the trauma of seeing his father dead by his own hands, the looks of disgust, the sadness that had been permeating in the air of their home is all catching up to Kakashi now that there is someone who understands his father and knows how to give good head rubs. Kakashi fails to restrict himself from nuzzling into the touch.
“ otou-san’s not coming back is he?” The innocent question from the stoic child makes the two adults feel beyond helpless, Jiraiya rubs the kids head with more firmness now, his message clear,
“ no he’s not. But I’ll be here pup and soon you’ll understand your father’s decision too”
“ Alphas shouldn’t abandon their packs” Minato’s eyes widen at that, the kid even though half asleep and drowsy and all soft looking still manages to growl in Jiraiya’s direction, his tone vehement.
Alpha?
“ I know pup but your otou-san knew he was leaving his clan in a more than capable Alpha’s hands.”
“ there’s no one else in the pack. I am no alpha”
“ no. You are a pup for now and that’s what you should be and I’ll be your pack and you’ll add more people in your pack as you live and grow up. It’s not just your clan pup, its your every true friend.”
Minato stays silent and lets Jiraiya sensei handle the situation with the distraught child. There are now some tears flowing down the kid’s eyes and all Minato wants to do is wrap the child up and keep him protected. Hunh.
But Jiraiya sensei seems to know what the child wants to hear and about this pack mentality which must be something special with the Hatake clan.
“ Want to take a nap pup? I’ll be here I promise”
The boy who had been practically nestled into Jiraiya’s side from the moment Jiraiya started those head rubs looks around with drowsy eyes. His eyes focus on Minato for a bit and his hidden nose twitches visibly, the kid apparently deems him safe enough and nestles back into Jiraiya’s side.
Jiraiya smiles softly looking at the boy nestled in his side and wraps one arm around him bringing the pup incredibly closer and moves his other hand to rub the little puppy’s head as he had done many times when the kid was young. younger.
Sakumo always used to complain that his son was more like a Dog than a wolf(always while affectionately rubbing the kid’s head and calling him all the dog nicknames) never realising how his own heart was more a bleeding entity than a cold blooded killer.
It hurts Jiraiya’s heart that Sakumo would take such a step but then from what he’s heard from around the village even in just a day since he’s been back he can guess the amount of hatred and discrimination the father-son pair must have been facing. He can guess why Sakumo did what he did after meeting the last living little Hatake.
For now for everyone else it’s a burdensome legacy for any father to have left his child with but Jiraiya is sure that it won’t last. When peace comes the white fang would be hailed as a hero even though never deserving the title of a martyr. His son would be accepted. Jiraiya hopes fiercely for this to come to fruition.
Jiraiya would however always have the regret that he couldn’t save his friend, couldn’t protect the little child in his arms from the dirty hateful looks he’s gotten so used to so early in life.
But what he can do now is take care of this child and ensure that Sarutobi sensei doesn’t loose the sight of will of fire protecting all of konoha including innocent children carrying the burden far too heavy for their shoulders.
“Sensei are you really going to adopt him?” Minato asks in a low tone so as not to wake the drowsing child in his sensei’s arms. It’s so odd to see his sensei like this.
Jiraiya-sensei however to Minato’s confusion shakes his head and replies in a regretful tone, “ I really can’t legally adopt him at this time Minato. I would, I have absolutely to problem with whatever the villagers have to say but I am just not qualified to be anything else other than a guardian. I live alone and I am too often on missions”
“ Sakumo-san used to go on missions as well, sometimes more higher ranked than yours. He lived alone too”
“ don’t rub it in brat. I know that but he had biology on his side and I have just a Piece of paper on mine.”
And about that why hadn’t Jiraiya sensei just started with that bit of information?
Minato nods absentmindedly, he trusts his sensei with his life but with a child comes responsibilities and Jiraiya sensei has the habit of ditching them and going out on his own.
“ come on Pup, we’ll go get some stuff from your home.”
Minato focuses again when he hears his sensei’s voice talking to the child in soft tones, the child who was drowsily nuzzled in his sensei’s side wakes up a bit whining shortly for the lack of head rubs but reels himself in quickly and rubs his eyes instead.
Minato used to babysit for extra funds when he had been too young for anything else but hasn’t been so awed at anyone’s cuteness before. The kid is practically a little puppy.
“ Jiraiya-san I, I am capable of living alone, Please I don’t want to cause any inconv…enience to you”
A scarred puppy perhaps.
“Don’t be silly pup, your house is going to be sealed and you’ll have to look for another place till its been cleared, I happen to have a place and I am actually your guardian on document, you can stay with me”
Kakashi looks at Jiraiya-san for a moment and then nods slowly, still hesitant about his welcome in another Villager’s house. His father’s friends if anything have been just cruel in these past times.
“Lets go pup”
Kakashi nods again hesitantly and when Jiraiya gives the indication that he’s going to pick up the little child he hurriedly gets down the uncomfortable hospital bench and stands on his own two feet giving a defiant look in jiraiya’s direction.
It amuses Jiraiya to see the kid behaving in this manner and in order to provide the physical touch or affection that the child seems to have lacked previously he grabs his arm showing he needs the support to get up and then rubs the kids head again.
Minato who’s seeing the whole scene from sidelines can’t control the soft smile that appears on his lips when he sees Kakashi involuntarily drift towards the touch and close to Jiraiya-sensei’s leg which he then grabs hold of slightly so as not to indicate anything amiss. Jiraiya-sensei gives him a nod and kakashi eyes him warily before the two are making their way outside.
Minato feels like he’s seeing his sensei with his own son with the freely provided affection and the similarity in their hair. It’s a humbling site as Minato never pegged jiraiya-sensei to be much of a father material with his constant disappearances and his childish behaviour.
Minato doesn’t realise on that day how much true his thinking will come to be.
It’ll be Tsunade Sama who’ll point out the lack of thinking in Jiraiya-sensei’s actions two days later when they are at Jiraiya’s home trying to clear out the junk from his guest room and make it liveable for a small human being while the little kid is at the academy.
“ you are a bleeding heart jiraiya. An impulsive one who has no thinking at all! Do you know what this action will do to your standing with the council? With the support you have till now received from the villagers even with all your disappearances and pervy acts?”
Minato knows Tsunade-Sama happens to have a little brother who’s too eager to go to the frontline and a to be lover who’s too reckless to stay behind. If the civilians have the right to blame Kakashi for anything his father did then Tsunade-Sama happens to be their leader.
“I happen to think Jiraiya is doing something right for the first time”
Minato’s not really sure about Orochimaru-San’s angle here.
Tsunade-Sama however does, “ of course you’d think so. You have been trying to make him act responsible all our time together”
Orochimaru-San shrugs as elegantly as he does everything else as one of his snakes approaches a pair of shoes beneath a table and after poking at it hisses and backs off.
Tsunade-Sama carries on with her rant, “ Jiraiya please think about this again. You’ll ruin your life! I know you. You can’t commit yourself to anything other than your silly stories and you want to keep a child with you? What about all those dirty books you read hunh? Can you part with them for a child?”
“ I have given it much consideration Tsunade and you shouldn’t be worried about me” Jiraiya sensei says for the first time most likely growing frustrated with Tsunade-sama’s reasoning.
“ I agree. We should be more worried about the child” Orochimaru-Sama says gliding in. There is a suspicious lack of a pair of shoes from the room.
Minato’s feeling completely out of his depth here and not because of the three powerful Shinobi he’s sharing space with as he has done that countless times being Jiraiya sama’s pupil but because Orochimaru-san is suddenly sounding the most sane one among the three friends. It’s earth shattering to say the least.
Minato sees his sensei now, trying (and losing) to arrange the small guest room according to what he thought would suit a child. He had bought a small bed yesterday and a few other items that Minato had had to purchase because apparently his sensei had been busy. Minato doubted he had be reimbursed for those.
Kakashi had had very little to his name (or too much, an entire clan rested on his shoulders) and most of those items couldn’t be shifted or kakashi refused to shift them saying he’ll be coming back home in some time anyways. So all the kid had really had was a few pairs of clothes, a green coloured scarf, a vast array of shuriken and kunai, his father’s tanto and a little book/diary which he refused to show either jiraiya and Minato. The stare off in Minato’s opinion had been very amusing and picture worthy (Minato had taken some but neither party was aware of that).
Minato is brought out of his musings by Tsunade-san throwing a box in his arms with a grumble.
“ I don’t know why its so hard to arrange a damn room” jiraiya sensei complained while arranging the little wardrobe once again to his satisfaction, or not.
“It’s because you are not meant to!” Tsunade san persuaded again.
“ its because you haven’t had the opportunity to before. And because the kid should be allowed to do this himself. Sakumo’s kid seems too independent to want you to do this for him”
Jiraiya sensei sighed and dropped his hands in defeat. It was unusual to see the three most powerful shinobi Minato knew behaving like normal folks and stressing over room decoration.
“I agree with Orochimaru-san, Kakashi-kun seems quite an independent child”
“Why can’t he be allowed to just live alone then? Lots of shinobi kids do, orphans do too” Tsunade-san groused once again and Minato was beginning to feel stirrings of anger behind his sternum at her crass attitude towards a harmless child.
Well may be not so harmless, Minato corrected himself thinking about all that growling and sharp canines behind the mask.
Again, it was ororchimaru-san who bothered to answer Tsunade-san and Minato wondered that if Jiraiya sensei wasn’t ready to face a friend with answers then how was he going to manage with the entire village?
“ it’s because Kakashi-san has different circumstances. With his father’s history he is likely to face lot of contempt and distrust from both the village and the council. As the war draws closer and gets more gruesome he’ll likely be a target of hate-crimes allot. Surviving the orphanage in such conditions would be very harmful for the child mentally…(after a few seconds) may be physically too.”
Minato glanced towards Jiraiya sensei who was quite and contemplative likely realising the consequences of his actions but Minato was happy to see that there was no doubt or guilt on his face.
Jiraiya sensei looked up and faced his teammates/friends and gave them a wide exuberant smile, “ well as fun as this has been I don’t think you guys helped me at all and now I am short of time and I have to go pick Kakashi up from the academy and likely pick up dinner”
His pointed dismissal made Tsunade-sama huff and leave while orochimaru-san left as silently and gracefully as he had arrived. Minato wished his sensei good luck and left as well.
Jiraiya came out of his humble abode and looked up, sun was still lighting up the sky but most likely for just another hour or so, jiraiya wished he had had more of a warning or training in this, “ Sakumo I hope I don’t disappoint you. I really want to give that kid a good life. He deserves so much, you deserved better my friend. I am sorry I wasn’t here to support you through this. But I promise I’ll take good care of my god-son”
With that Jiraiya nodded and after activating the protective seals around his house left to pick up Kakashi from the academy. He was lost in thoughts of the previous day.
Kakashi had been at the hospital for 2 days before Jiraiya brought him to his home and even before that he suspected from all the gossips around the village that Kakashi had sat beside his father’s prone form for a day or 2 days before he gained enough sense to go to academy or try and call someone. He hadn’t known whom to inform.
The kid had to be tired, restless, famished and smelly with all that time spent all alone and with no one to care for him. But he hadn’t said anything to jiraiya.
If Jiraiya hadn’t pushed him to the bathroom to take a bath he wouldn’t have taken one so as not to dirty his bathroom, if he hadn’t put food in front of the kid the kid would have likely starved to not to take anything he didn’t deserve and if he hadn’t scratched the kid’s head and asked him to relax for a bit he probably would have fainted from exhaustion.
That kid was stubborn and too independent for his own good. Jiraiya had known that sakumo had had to leave for missions frequently in the past year but he hadn’t known that it had left the child alone for such long periods that he had learned to grow up so quickly. Probably that’s why his gentle friend didn’t think once leaving a 5 year old to fend for himself?
Jiraiya hoped he at least had some time to establish a repo between them and between Kakashi and Minato (most likely Kushina-chan too then) so that when he had to leave for missions, Kakashi had someone else to depend on.
That is to say that the kid wanted to live with him after he got over the trauma of his father’s sudden suicide.
And that just opened a whole another can of worms which Jiraiya wasn’t ready to deal with. That kid needed therapy.
The kid had insisted to go to the academy today. Jiraiya had been sceptical considering all the political and social issues surrounding a Shinobi’s suicide but seeing the kid so antsy had made him relent. Besides Jiraiya had his own work cut out for him with a child(and what?) Moving in with him and all.
Jiraiya had wanted to walk Kakashi to the academy but Kakashi had been adamant to make the walk alone. He claimed he needed the space to get his head straight and Jiraiya couldn’t figure out what kid thought like that? But anyhow with what he’s garnered about the kid till now, he seemed pretty knowledgeable for his age.
Before Jiraiya had decided to take the kid in, the little child had already had a whole plan thought up which ultimately would have come to fruition seeing how the council didn’t really want to deal with the hatake’s at all these days.
Jiraiya sighed. Feeling so many emotions at once and being unable to face them was already draining him. How would he handle a traumatised child who was too independent, too silent, too distrustful and gave you attention only when given head rubs but was averse to being given physical affection?
Well, the answer was quite simple really. Through perfecting the art of discrete head rubs.
The whole thing brought a smile to Jiraiya’s face and somehow made him feel confident about his decision. The child was innocent however burdened and deserved happiness.
Jiraiya hadn’t seen the academy since his own graduation Long long ago so seeing something so familiar yet so different was a shock to his system.
As was the sight of the little puppy he has recently taken in barking at some much older dumbass dogs. Who were apparently chunin level and were being given free reign to bully a child by all.
Jiraiya’s blood boiled in his veins as he stepped forward from where he had stopped in shock at the scene. His wooden gata making a grumbling sound.
But before he had even reached the unfair fight unfolding before him he was once again forced to standstill. One of the chunin kids had taken offence to something said by a bored looking kakashi and moved to punch the kid. However in next moment before Jiraiya could even react the boy was on the ground groaning while his two companions first looked shocked and then grumbled and lunged together at the little boy.
Kakashi may have been small and slight but he was not lacking in talent and smartness. He used his two weaknesses to his advantage against his opponent and easily let the boys flew from above him as he simply ducked rolled stood and with two well aimed kicks (ouch, harsh kid) trounced his bullies.
Looking just as bored defeating 3 much older chunin levels as he had looked brushing his teeth yesterday.
His puppy is apparently a prodigy. As was showcased by the clear lack of attention gained by the boy as if this was something routine.
This might be much more interesting than Jiraiya had previously thought.
“AYE KAKASHI!”
The sheer volume of that sentence drew Jiraiya’s attention away from his charge and towards a clumsy blur of green and orange jumpsuit.
“Defeating 3 less than deserving shinobi much older than himself! I had expect nothing else from my rival!”
Rival?
His charge looked at the weird blur with his ever present bored expression but didn’t say anything or dodge the company. He however did turn around to walk away but Jiraiya could see that he was a step hesitant as if he either wanted the boy to follow him or stay with him instead. The boy did follow.
Ah, A friend. His charge is apparently socially inept as well, it might be an inherent quality as seen in childhood prodigies (read: ororchimaru) or a result of Sakumo’s disgrace from society. Jiraiya had already come to the conclusion anyways because its hard to dodge Minato’s sunny attitude but the kid had just given him suspicious looks. However it’s difficult to judge a child’s attitude just after a traumatic experience.
Jiraiya is proud of his intelligence work today.
Smiling Jiraiya moved forward meaning to intercept his charge and meet this friend who was going to prove an ally he was sure when he was once again stopped in his path by the elder version of the green and orange ally. Hunh.
“Jiraiya-Sama. It’s an honour to make your acquaintance” the man bowed deeply and Jiraiya returned with a nod.
“ I am Might Dai, Might Gai’s father. He’s your wards eternal rival”
What is this business with rivals? Whatever.
Jiraiya raised an eyebrow but greeted the man anyways. It was not good form to make your new charge loose friends by being rude to their parents. (Don’t stare at me, Minato. I decided some books were worth picking up from library)
“ Dai-san. It’s good to see that Kakashi has someone in the academy with him”
Might dai looked behind himself where the kids had stopped and Gai was apparently declaring something or other in loud volumes.
“ I…I am glad you decided to take on Kakashi-kun. He’s a handful but an extremely talented and loyal boy. It’s really tragic what happened to his father. (With nervousness that did not suit the man at all in jiraiya’s opinion) I…it would have been difficult for me to take the boy on because of all this reputation business. (He suddenly turned animated and Jiraiya had to take a step back) NOT THAT I WOULD MIND! It would have been a challenge and for growth challenging yourself is important.”
Jiraiya realised that there was actually some truth in Kakashi trying to back away from Might Gai if his father’s enthusiasm and volume at close range was anything to go by. Jiraiya’s ears were already close to bleeding so he close to disperse the conversation for now.
“ I know. You seem like a good man and your son seems like an ally for my ward. I am his legal Guardian, yes. (Using the moment for something more important) so if you see anything like today happening yourself or your son reports any similar event to you I hope you will not mind coming to me with it? Kakashi is still a little reserved.”
Might Dai nodded enthusiastically and proclaimed his undying loyalty to the talented boy of the White fang. A yes would have been enough for Jiraiya but never mind.
After that both Adults met with their respective charges and Jiraiya was confused to see the anger and confusion in Kakashi’s eyes but said nothing in front of their acquittances.
Sometime later after much difficulty the white haired ( kakashi: silver) duo were on their way to home. What a long day and Jiraiya still had dinner to think about. Groceries to purchase. Was there anything that little kids required specially. Milk perhaps? His ward in particular could benefit with some of that with how skinny he was and may be some conversation too.
“ so how was your day.”
A nod.
“ did you get to learn something new?”
A nod.
“Hmm…I saw you back there with those boys (Kakashi’s shoulders tightened minutely but otherwise the kid gave no indication of anything). That was an impressive fight.”
“They were dumb”
AHA! 3 words!
“I agree. The young boy Gai, is his name? He seems nice. A friend?”
A hesitant shrug. Well. Gains and loses.
After a bit, “ would you like something specific for dinner?”
A shrug.
“ a dessert perhaps”
A no. Hunh? What kind of a kid didn’t want desserts?
They walked in silence for a bit after that, Jiraiya unable to come up with any more topic or questions to talk with a child and Kakashi more than happy to stay silent and just walk.
So it was a surprise when he heard the small child like voice from beside him, albeit grumpy,
“ you shouldn’t have come to the academy. Jiraiya-san”
Hmmm, that was not something he had expected to hear. He had thought the kid would be happy to have someone walk alongside him.
He asked calmly,
“ Why is that Kakashi-kun?” He didn’t think using a nickname with a sensitive child was a good move right now. He had been like that. It felt like adults didn’t take you seriously enough.
“ the villagers. Shinobi and civilians alike will see you with me.” The kid said apparently having no qualms about being rude and treating Jiraiya like a child.
Jiraiya however really was confused, what was this exactly about?
“ yeah. So?”
“ are you that stupid Jiraiya-san?”
“hey! That’s no way of talking to your senior, you B..” Jiraiya stuttered angrily at the kid but was interrupted by his same bored speech.
“ Exactly. I am Hatake Sakumo’s bastard. It’s better if you don’t associate yourself with me so openly”
Jiraiya was right in thinking that his work is cut out for him with Sakumo’s child. The child is perceptive. Jiraiya had been noticing all the looks and whispers too as they passed.
“I hope you have noticed all the looks and whispers.”
This aggravating child! Jiraiya has commandeered sage mode and this child is questioning him on his basic skills. Hunh.
“ do they bother you kakashi-kun?”
The boy shrugged nonchalantly. “ I am used to it.”
“Hmm…so what is it that bothers you?”
Jiraiya was sure to keep his voice interested and not placating, his charge is brimming with pride.
“ it doesn’t. But it will bother you since it shouldn’t be about you. It isn’t.”
“ I can assure you it doesn’t bother me kakashi-kun”
The kid was suddenly vehement and poking him in his side which was the most he could reach..
“ IT WILL! It never bothered otou-san before but then it did and he is gone now!”
Oh pup.
Jiraiya glanced at the child and his usually neutral face which showcased so many emotions now with just his eyes. Jiraiya was beginning to understand that Sakumo figured it out quite early how expressive his little pup was.
Jiraiya crouched on his knees and deliberately showcasing his movements grabbed the child’s shoulders. They were thin, vulnerable and oh so breakable in his large hands…
“ Kakashi, Pup. The stares, the long looks, the whispers, they don’t bother me because I don’t pay any attention to them. These are people who either don’t understand or don’t want to. I don’t know any of them personally and honestly they don’t matter to me. You do PUP. You are mine now. And I am not going to leave you.”
The kid looked in his eyes and he must have seen something that made him believe Jiraiya. He swayed forward, his one foot scuffing the cemented road below and jiraiya heard a very soft, very self-conscious whisper, “ I…I would like to be held. Please. Jiraiya-san”
A very scared, very scarred broken puppy indeed.
How could have Jiraiya held himself back from winding his arms fully around the little boy’s shoulders? How could anybody expect him to not to place a soft kiss over those unruly silver locks so much like his own. How could he stop himself from grabbing the child tightly and picking him up even though it earned him an indignant squeak from his grumpy bundle.
“ common kid. It’s getting late for dinner.”
They had dinner a little late that day because after coming home Kakashi was suddenly animated about the placement of every DAMN thing in his room and Jiraiya wondered how was it that all prodigies thought alike and why if orochimaru had already known he had let them waste an entire day away to this madness.
The kid was smiling by the end of it though so Jiraiya counted it as a success. It felt like they had moved too fast from nods and shrugs and scared little hamsters to growling puppies.
Jiraiya didn’t mind though. Something in his proclamation earlier had changed his own opinion in the child’s heart. It felt exhilarating to have brought that smile on that little saddened scrunched up face.
The kid said nothing for the rest of the day but his eyes had been enough.
Next day was much the same. The kid was stubborn but Jiraiya was giving him space right now.
A week later Tsunade threw a fit when Jiraiya turned down a mission in order to not leave Kakashi in the middle of a new adjustment.
Two weeks later it was orochimaru who questioned him whether he was not itching for something more to do? Jiraiya laughed him off.
A month later and Jiraiya found that even though he was enjoying this domestic life, his times with the kid, training the little prodigy new tricks and tracks was much stimulating too and yet he was itching to get out. To explore all the unexplored pages of his life. He wanted to know what was behind those trees, nearer to the moon, closer to the stars.
“Jiraiya-san?” He jerked and turned around, Ah he had been gazing out at the night sky for too long yet again.
“What is it pup?”
The kid shuffled on his two little feet but then controlled himself much like a well trained shinobi having a moment of lack of control, it made him smile. Kakashi was set to graduate from the academy in 3 months. All his teachers claimed that they really didn’t have anything more to teach the child.
All of them liars. Even in his short life with the child Jiraiya knew Kakashi had too much to learn about living.
“ common speak up.”
At the prompt the kid scowled at him and crossed his arms across his chest. He looked too adorable to not to rub his head but Jiraiya maintained his form,
“I was going to bed”
Ah. Bedtime head rubs had become a ritual just after a week of the pup’s stay with him.
“Let’s go then”
The kid nodded as solemnly as he could and managed not to slide and run to his room. The kid was too excited for just some head rubs. Well he would be because that’s the only time he really allowed jiraiya to show him any affection through touch.
They both took their places, Jiraiya on a small stool beside the bed and Kakashi on it. He began to rub the pup’s head soothingly, scratching sometimes, a sweet smile forming on his own lips as the child relaxed into the touch he allowed himself so fleetingly.
He didn’t expect the boy to say this though,
“ I..I were tou-chan’s too but..not enough. He couldn’t stay for me”
Jiraiya didn’t know what to say to the kid but apparently this was not the main point.
“ Am i…am I enough for you Jiraiya-san?”
Jiraiya had never labelled himself as domestic, he enjoyed teaching but he had never thought of kids of his own because they required stability and Jiraiya loved to travel. This little puppy however has managed to carve a space out in his heart and curl up there. Jiraiya thinks may be it’s enough.
“ You are pup. You are.”
May be.