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Drowning.
He was drowning.
The world around him turned to a black hole as he sunk deeper and deeper. His ears popped while his weakened lungs could only withstand the lack of oxygen for another few moments before they had enough.
"Mfmp!"
Bubbles burst out through his lips as his body faded into the darkness.
"Yukine!"
With an extreme gasp, he burst up. An intense coughing fit greeted him as his upper chest throbbed. Gentle pats lined his back but between sputtering and trying to breathe again, he was too busy to notice Yato behind him.
"It's okay Yukine. You're okay."
That familiar sensation of descent through the deep water still filled Yukine's entire body but as his eyes laid on their surroundings, the reality of where he was sunk in. That palm continued to pat his back but all he could do was sit there on his futon while he noticed the slickness of his dampened neck. He was in Kofuku's attic along with Yato. Despite knowing this, it didn't stop his shakes. Yukine peered to the side and met framillar eyes hazy with concern. As shame quickly covered him, Yukine slid away, averting his gaze. "I'm fine, it's not a big deal."
When Yato's cerulean eyes glowed and when he was met with that look, the boy stared down at the floor. "Yato, I'm fine."
Yato didn't say anything and Yukine then felt those bright eyes staring him up and down. What was he doing? Why was he studying him? He let out a huff. Whatever, he wasn't in the mood to deal with the God's crap. He turned over, purposely making it so that his back faced Yato, and got comfy once more.
The room fell silent which Yukine was thankful for. He couldn't tell if Yato had given up or still watched him but it didn't matter. If the guy wanted to stay up all night then so be it.
Yukine laid there in the darkness, his vision landing on the far wall across the tiny room. As much as he wanted to, his active mind forbade him to fall back asleep. What if he had the- his eyes squeezed shut as he let out a long uneven breath as quietly as he could. It was fine, once Yato was asleep for sure, he'd get up and work on his homework or something until the sun rose.
Shuffling sounds could be heard from beside him and Yukine stayed in his current position until the movement stilled. Yato was a deep sleeper. He knew this from all those nights of sleeping near him so he just had to be patient.
Having no clock in the attic, he stayed curled onto his side, still staring at that wall. It had felt like at least half an hour of waiting but it was impossible to know for certain. Was Yato asleep yet? The nagging urge to check was there but if he wasn't, Yukine would have to deal with whatever came out of the God's mouth. It wasn't worth it, he decided, and remained where he was.
Minutes passed by and his eyes slowly dropped but with a wave of panic, they shot back open again. Hurry up Yato! Get to sleep! Yukine's impatience fought through. He had to be asleep by now. It had been long enough. With a slow roll over, he snuck a peek at Yato. The God's eyes were shut and his arms were behind his head. It was a usual sleeping position so that was a good sign.
Yukine slipped his covers off himself ever so slowly and sat up, watching Yato for any movements. Luckily, he hadn't moved so the coast was clear! He took the plunge and stood up.
"Go to sleep, Yukine."
That voice almost jump-started the boy's heart. "Yato!" he hissed with a hand over his chest. "Don't do that!"
The God wore a serious face and slowly opened his eyes without moving. "You need your rest."
"I'm not tired." Yukine flashed him an indifferent look. "I'm going to study."
Yato eyed him, giving him a look he didn't really understand. "You know that you're safe here with me."
Those words frustrated the boy as his arms wrapped around his torso. "I'm not scared or something, you know." The guy always babied him and it was really annoying. Yato's facial expression changed to one he would give if he were scolding a child and Yukine knew that if he moved any further, Yato would just nag him. "Why do you care if I stay up for a little?"
"Because," Yato started. "You need to be at the top of your game. You and I both."
Yukine rolled his eyes, making sure Yato could see. It was always about Yato, always about fighting phantoms and never about what he wanted. "I was always at the 'top of my game' when we slept like bums and the whole neighbourhood could hear your annoying sleep talking." Ugh, why was the guy always on his case? He had lots to worry about instead, like maybe finding a freaking steady job.
Yato let out a large breath. "We were not bums." He shook his head in disbelief. Yukine waited for him to add more but when he didn't, he let the God have it.
"We're mooching off Kofuku and Daikoku!"
Yato's eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly and Yukine prepared himself. Here we go. "Speaking of, if you don't be quiet, you'll wake them!"
Yukine opened his mouth but then shut it. He hated to admit it but here, Yato was right. If they continued, they'd probably wake those two. After them being so kind to Yato's incompetence, he wouldn't want to annoy them anymore than they probably already were. "This is why I just wanted to study but you had to be annoying for no reason."
Yato's voice slipped into a low whisper. "If you weren't being such a brat and just went to sleep, then we wouldn't be having this problem!"
"I'm not a brat!" Yukine hissed.
"You're sure behaving like one to me!"
"Says you! You're the most immature one here!"
Yato merely shut his eyes and rubbed his temples. "Damn kids."
Eyes lowered at Yato and Yukine huffed. Truthfully, his body was on its way to sleep but he couldn't lose to Yato. Besides, he really didn't want to sleep…
"Fine," Yato stood up with arms outstretched over his head. "Just no whining when I wake you up tomorrow." His hand tugged on the string of the light to turn it on.
Was he for real? Yukine rolled his eyes. Did he forget that he was the one who needed to be woken up every morning? "Whatever." With that, he stepped over to the kotatsu and plopped down to do his studying. Finally he was left alone. The homework sheets Hiyori had left him proved to be a successful distraction. Soon he forgot all about Yato.
Yukine tapped the lined paper in thought. He appreciated Hiyori giving him difficult problems but sometimes it sucked to not have her there for help. Sure he'd show her his work later but in instances like tonight, he really was stuck. It was clear that he had to use one formula but which numbers filled in what values? Covering a yawn, Yukine eyes fell on Yato once more. The God still laid on his back but this time, his arms rested down by his sides. Nodding to himself, he stood up again. Yato was finally asleep.
The second the room filled with blackness again, Yukine froze, hand on the light's string. He felt the urgent need to turn it back on but he couldn't. If he left it on overnight, he knew he would only receive more nagging from Yato. It took all it could for him to let go of the string and tuck himself into bed.
The shaking resumed and weak fingers grasped the edges of the comforter, pulling it up to his chin. He tried to blink to see but the darkness impaired his vision.
Yukine held his breath when Yato suddenly shifted to face him. The God wore the typical sleeping face but even still, Yukine expected him to say something. To his surprise, all he did was lift a hand over his head and reach behind his pillow. Yukine watched in curiosity. Was he just moving in his sleep?
Out of nowhere, a gentle flicker of light peeked from behind the pillow. It was just enough so Yukine didn't have to squint. Wait, what was that?
Yato lifted the item to rest in between their futons. A small black metal lantern sat there, flame glistening within the night. His blue eyes gave a quick look at Yukine before he turned over.
Yukine simply gazed at the God's back and then back at the lantern. What was this for? A sudden sense of embarrassment hit him. Did… did Yato know? Did he figure it out? He wanted to be mad and annoyed but for some reason he had a hard time feeling that way. The light illuminated the room and his grip on the comforter relaxed.
Why would Yato do that? He didn't care about him.
Unless…
No. He only did that so Yukine would fall asleep and would be a well charged regalia for phantom hunting tomorrow. He didn't care about him. He only cared about himself.
Despite these thoughts, foreign feelings fill him with the possibility that under that cold exterior, maybe Yato did care, even a little. No, Yukine stopped himself. Yato didn't care. He gazed at Yato's back once more, unsure of how to feel.
Letting out a small breath, Yukine snuggled under the covers and cautiously allowed his eyes to close. The things around him warmed up with the soft, tender glow of the lantern and for once, out of all the times Yukine had slept near Yato, he truly felt safe.