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This was it. This was officially the worst day of Atsushi’s life.
The day he’d discovered he was a man-eating tiger, the day he’d had his leg lobbed off, the day he’d gotten kidnapped by the Guild and had to jump out of a moving plane—these days all paled in comparison to today. In fact, Atsushi longed for the days of falling hundreds of feet and sustaining near-fatal injuries in this moment.
He was staring across the alley at the place he’d been standing in just moments before. Staring at two eyes, wide with surprise in a way that his were no doubt mirroring exactly.
Two purple and yellow eyes, two eyes that should belong to him, complete with a face that most definitely belonged to him.
He finally tore his eyes away from himself, looking down at his own hands. A part of him already knew whose hands he would find, but maybe if he just checked, maybe he’d be in any other situation than the one he had undoubtedly just found himself in.
His stomach dropped at the familiar dark sleeves, lined with a white ruffled fabric. His hands were slim and much paler than his real hands, and shit.
This was the worst day of his life.
Really, he should’ve realized something was off that morning, before he even went on this mission. Should’ve realized it in the way that Dazai was acting suspiciously chipper, even showing up to work on time, early enough to see Atsushi off before he headed out on his first ever solo case.
“Hurry, hurry, Atsushi-kun! You can’t be late, today’s a big day~!”
Atsushi had foolishly assumed that Dazai was just overly excited that it was his first solo mission since joining the Agency. Because, looking back on it now, he had no doubts that Dazai somehow knew that he would end up in this exact situation.
“Jinko?!” Akutagawa interrupted the silence stretching uncomfortably between them, his voice loud and angry in a way that made Atsushi jump. He wasn’t used to hearing his own voice sound so mean.
When he looked back to Akutagawa’s face—technically his own, but it was too weird to think about like that—, he was met with an even more disturbing experience than hearing his own vocal cords being manipulated by the only person Atsushi could say with certainty truly despised him.
His face was scrunched up with all the anger, disgust, and familiar resentment he was used to seeing on Akutagawa’s face. However, he was used to seeing it on specifically Akutagawa’s face, on his own face it was nothing short of terrifying.
“Um.” He offered in return, and his voice coming out in Akutagawa’s usual rasp was so strange that he momentarily forgot about the man standing across from him.
That moment of blissful ignorance did not last long, though, because the next thing he knew, Akutagawa was lunging at him threateningly.
Atsushi took half a step back, shock mingled with fear spiking through his veins as Akutagawa closed the distance between them, but when Atsushi tried to gasp, his breath caught in his chest painfully, and a cough was forced out from between his lips.
Akutagawa froze across from him.
The cough didn’t last long, but it was alarmingly painful. Sure, Atsushi had caught his fair share of colds before, but this was something else—
“I am going to kill you now.” Akutagawa told him matter-of-factly, his eyes filled with a murderous intent that had Atsushi momentarily distracted from the cough.
“Wait, wait, wait—!” Atsushi shouted, waving his arms out in front of him to attempt to get Akutagawa to not attack him again. Akutagawa surely got the message, but he deliberately ignored it.
He took another threatening step forward, and Atsushi had never been more creeped out by himself before than in this moment.
“The Ability-user!” He tried, and Akutagawa paused, as if he’d forgotten about the man who had put them in this predicament to begin with.
Akutagawa spun on his heel, looking toward the entrance of the alley to where the Ability-user had been less than three minutes ago, but, to no one’s surprise, he was long gone by now.
Unfortunately, this only seemed to fuel Akutagawa’s rage, and Atsushi was starting to worry if his body would even be able to handle having that much anger in it, or if it would just fail and explode.
“This is your fault!” Akutagawa growled, and Atsushi felt a spike of indignance.
“My fault?!” He barked back, his voice sounded distorted to his ears—though he supposed neither his voice nor his ears were really his.
“You’re the one who barged in here and tried to attack me!” Atsushi shouted, and Akutagawa’s eyes narrowed threateningly.
“I wasn’t trying to attack you, I was clearly going to attack the Ability-user!” Akutagawa paused, then,
“I was going to kill you after him.”
Atsushi felt a flare of annoyance in his gut, and he briefly wondered if he’d somehow picked up some sort of residual rage from Akutagawa’s body.
“Yeah, well you shouldn’t be killing anybody! This was my mission, and I had to—”
“Shut up!” Akutagawa snapped, spinning on his heel. “I have no interest in your pathetic Agency’s futile attempts at peaceful operations.”
Atsushi tried desperately to control his own anger at Akutagawa’s… Akutagawa-ness.
“Let’s go, jinko.” Akutagawa headed toward the exit of the alley, and Atsushi felt confusion momentarily overtake his irritation.
“Go?” He parroted, stepping forward to follow Akutagawa anyway. “Go where?”
Akutagawa paused mid step, letting out an exasperated sigh.
“To the Armed Detective Agency.” He said shortly, resuming his walking.
Atsushi stopped at that, suspicion curling in his gut. Why would Akutagawa want to go to the Agency? Was he planning on pretending to be Atsushi and saying he’d captured Akutagawa? Was it an infiltration? Was he trying to take Kyouka back? Was he—
“Why would you go to the Agency?” He asked, but his voice was flat. Suspicious. Akutagawa sent him a narrow-eyed look over his shoulder.
“So Dazai-san can nullify this horrendous ability, obviously. Are you stupid?”
Ah—oh. That made sense. Atsushi did feel a bit stupid, now. Then again, that didn’t mean he wasn’t still suspicious.
“And only for that?” He asked, watching Akutagawa closely for any sign that he was hiding something.
“This is the worst imaginable situation I’ve ever been in, jinko.” Akutagawa growled, and Atsushi was glad they were at least on the same page in that front.
“If I have to go to your pitiful Detective Agency in order to have it undone, then I’ll suffer through it.” And wow, that was the least nice way he could’ve possibly said that, wasn’t it?
“You don’t have to be an ass about it.” He muttered, but his suspicions were—mostly—cleared, so he fell into step beside Akutagawa as they headed toward the Agency.
“Do you want me to slaughter you?” Akutagawa bit out, glaring at him vehemently.
“And don’t walk beside me. Unless you want your leg chopped off again.” Akutagawa had real murder in his eyes, so Atsushi had half a mind to heed to his demand, but the stubborn part of him refused to back down.
“Fine, I’ll walk in front of you then—” He said petulantly, instead of pointing out the obvious fact that Akutagawa would be cutting his own leg off. However, his move to step forward was immediately cut short by Akutagawa grabbing the back of his collar and forcefully tugging him back. Atsushi gasped, and the pain in his lungs was back again. He barely managed to swallow down the cough that threatened to erupt from his lungs.
“What the hell?!” He grabbed Akutagawa’s collar in turn, pulling him backwards as well. They both stumbled as they momentarily lost their balance, before Akutagawa was spinning to face him with a fire in his eyes.
“Touch me again and you’ll lose your hands, jinko.”
“I wouldn’t have done it if you just acted like a normal human being and let me walk!”
“The only reason I’ve spared you so far is because you’re in my body, don’t think I’ll grant you the same graces once we’ve switched back!”
“Same goes for you!”
After what was definitely longer than the should-have-been ten minute walk back to the Agency, Akutagawa and Atsushi stumbled through the front door of the building, shoving at each other as they rushed toward the stairs.
They managed up the stairwell just as well as they had all the way to the Agency, and Atsushi briefly considered himself lucky for being in Akutagawa’s body, because the other surely would’ve shoved him over the stair railing to plunge to his imminent death if it wouldn’t technically be a suicide.
Only once they stood outside of the door to the Agency did they stop fighting, Akutagawa’s back straightening up the moment he heard Dazai’s voice from inside the closed door.
“Listen, Akutagawa,” Atsushi started, trying to find a semblance of a plan before just barging in to embarrass themselves in front of all of his colleagues.
“To you? Never.” Akutagawa bit back shortly, and Atsushi felt exasperation creeping into his chest.
“Just—let’s just act natural, okay? This entire thing is stupid so it’s better if it stays between me, you, and Dazai-san, right? So for the next two minutes, I’ll act like you and you act like me, okay?” He laid out his plan, and Akutagawa didn’t even glance in his direction. Atsushi almost wondered if he’d truly just tuned Atsushi out, but then he was narrowing his eyes at the door.
“You could never convincingly act like me, jinko.”
Atsushi held back a sigh.
“Okay, whatever, I don’t think you’d be able to act like me either, but you don’t hear me complaining…” He muttered, and Akutagawa’s eyes snapped to him, glaring.
“...Let’s just go.” He sighed, and Akutagawa was still for a long moment before nodding jerkingly. It almost seemed like he was nervous.
Then again, Akutagawa always acted strangely around Dazai, so Atsushi attributed it to that.
He reached toward the door, taking a deep breath as he readied himself to open it, before it swung open on it’s hinges on its own.
Atsushi jumped in shock, and he was immediately met with Ranpo’s face.
He froze up as Ranpo studied the both of them before he breezed past them. Atsushi almost thought that they were in the clear before Ranpo paused down the hall.
“Interesting situation the two of you have gotten yourselves into, no?” His voice was amused, and Atsushi immediately knew he was aware of their predicament. Of course he was, how could he have hoped to fool anyone, let alone Ranpo.
“Ranpo-san, I can explain—” He started, but Akutagawa kicked him in the shin, effectively cutting him off.
“Don’t make my voice sound so meek, jinko.” He hissed, and Atsushi turned to glare at him, Ranpo already heading into the stairwell, clearly uninterested in the conversation.
“Oh, Atsushi-kun, Akutagawa-kun!” A much too cheery voice called out through the now open door of the office, “What a surprise~”
“Dazai-san.” Akutagawa snapped to attention, and Atsushi sent him a wary look. Then his eyes turned to Dazai, who was watching them with clear amusement on his face.
“Well, don’t be shy, come on in~!” Dazai practically sang, waving them inside. Atsushi only paused for a second before heading in behind Akutagawa.
From a glance around the room, Atsushi counted himself lucky that it was empty for everyone but Dazai. Hopefully it stayed that way until Dazai nullified the ability.
“My, Akutagawa-kun, you’re behaving quite strangely,” It took Atsushi a moment to realize that Dazai was talking to him. His eyes widened in surprise as he momentarily wondered if Dazai somehow didn’t know that they’d swapped bodies, but then he saw the mirth in Dazai’s eyes, and the thought disappeared entirely.
“Dazai-san, this isn’t funny,” He tried, and Dazai’s grin just grew.
“Whatever do you mean, Akutagawa-kun~?”
“Stop being a dunce, jinko!” Akutagawa suddenly gritted out between clenched teeth as his eyes bore holes into the side of Atsushi’s head.
“What did I do—!?” He started, rounding on Akutagawa, but Dazai interrupted the confrontation before it began.
“Ah ah ah, don’t be fighting in here, that’s not very professional, Atsushi-kun,” Dazai pointed out, and Atsushi was just glad that he’d stopped calling him Akutagawa.
“Dazai-san, we were hit with an ability that made me have to wear this terrible tiger skin.” Akutagawa said, unsurprisingly finding the rudest possible way to explain the situation.
“Please nullify the ability so I no longer have to be humiliated by appearing as the jinko.”
Atsushi stared at him, mouth agape.
“Have you ever not been an asshole?” He asked, almost astonished. Akutagawa didn’t even spare him a glance, but his jaw clenched visibly in irritation.
“I’m afraid not, Atsushi-kun,” Dazai whispered to him, as if Akutagawa couldn’t hear them—he could. “He’s always acted like he has a cactus stuck up his—”
“Please nullify the ability, Dazai-san!” Akutagawa cut in, his voice only more aggravated.
“Yes, please do.” Atsushi reiterated, agreeing with Akutagawa just this once.
Dazai hummed thoughtfully, even put a finger to his chin as he mulled it over. Mulled what over, Atsushi didn’t know. Didn’t want to know.
“Hm, no, I don’t think I will,” Dazai finally decided, clapping his hands together, sounding much too joyous, considering.
“Eh—?!” Atsushi exclaimed, waiting for Dazai to say he was kidding and to nullify the ability.
“Nope, it’s just way too amusing, don’t you think, At-su-shi-kun~?” Dazai drawled, and Atsushi hung his head in disappointment. He shouldn't have expected this to be so simple, not with Dazai involved.
It was then that Akutagawa moved, lunging toward Dazai with an unexpected amount of speed. Atsushi barely managed to look up in time to see Dazai stepping neatly out of the way of Akutagawa’s… attack?
“Akutagawa!” Atsushi shouted when Akutagawa moved to go after Dazai again. “What the hell are you doing?!”
Akutagawa didn’t answer, didn’t even glance his way, just moved to lunge after Dazai again who appeared to be having the time of his life easily evading Akutagawa’s attacks.
Atsushi leaped forward, grabbing Akutagawa’s arm and wrenching him backward. Akutagawa must have not expected his movement, because he stumbled back a few feet, away from a grinning Dazai.
“I won’t let you attack Dazai-san!” Atsushi shouted, and Akutagawa finally looked at him, his eyes lit up with anger.
“I’m not attacking him, jinko!” He shouted, wrenching his arm from Atsushi’s grasp.
“That’s not what it looked like from here!” Atsushi bit back, and Akutagawa looked about ready to yell something back at him, before a flash of frustrated resignation passed through his eyes, and he visibly forced himself to calm down.
Atsushi was almost shocked.
“We just have to touch him.” Akutagawa finally said, and Atsushi just frowned.
“Touch…?” He started, then, oh. It clicked.
Dazai’s ability was always active. So as long as either Atsushi or Akutagawa could lay a hand on him, the ability would be nullified and they’d return to their own bodies.
“Now you understand.” Akutagawa spoke up, seemingly noticing Atsushi’s realization. They both turned their attention to Dazai, who was standing a comfortable distance away from them, his grin turning more knowing.
“My, my, what wonderful teamwork we have going on here~” He mused.
“Dazai-san, don’t make us do this,” Atsushi warned, but Dazai’s amusement didn’t waver.
“Shut up, jinko. We have to do this by force, it’s Dazai-san we’re talking about.” Akutagawa growled, and Atsushi frowned slightly, wondering, not for the first time, how he and Akutagawa seemed to have such differing opinions on who Dazai was.
“Rashoumon!” Akutagawa called on his ability, and Atsushi took the cue for what it was.
“Beast Beneath the Moonlight!” He shouted almost simultaneously along with Akutagawa, but Dazai’s grin turned sharper, and Atsushi immediately realized that they were both huge idiots.
“Wh—?” Akutagawa seemed to realize that his ability wasn’t activating, and he glanced behind him as if to check, before he seemingly came to the same realization that Atsushi just had.
He met Atsushi’s eyes for a moment, looking somewhat astonished—likely at his own incompetence.
“Now, how exactly do you two plan to call on the abilities that you don’t have?” Dazai teased, and Atsushi saw something dark and hateful pass through Akutagawa’s eyes for the briefest moment, before he was snapping his head toward Dazai.
“What will you do now?” Dazai asked, and Atsushi finally followed Akutagawa’s line of sight to look toward his mentor.
“We could try using each other’s abilities—” Atsushi started, his eyes not leaving Dazai as he spoke.
“I’m not using your useless ability!” Akutagawa snarled, sounding much angrier than he had a moment ago.
“Do you have a better idea?!” Atsushi shot back, and Akutagawa grit his teeth so hard that Atsushi was momentarily worried that his jaw would snap.
He didn’t answer. That was answer enough.
“That’s what I thought,” Atsushi huffed out quietly, before rounding on Dazai again.
He spent a long moment worried about if he’d be able to control Rashoumon—that is, if he’d even be able to call on it, given that this wasn’t his body. What if he lost control of it and destroyed the office? What if he stabbed him self with it or something? He knew Dazai was at least safe from any carnage the ability might instill, given that he couldn’t be touched without nullifying it, but he couldn’t say the same for Akutagawa.
Akutagawa, who was currently occupying his body. If he accidentally sliced off Akutagawa’s head, would that mean that he’s dead?
“Before you two get ability-crazy,” Dazai interrupted his train of thought, “You should know that there is a way to stop this particular ability on your own.”
Atsushi paused. He saw Akutagawa do the same thing next to him.
“Meaning…?” He started, and Dazai smirked. He was starting to get a bad feeling about this.
“Yes, Atsushi-kun. Meaning that you two can switch back to the proper bodies without my ability.” His smirk was growing dangerously entertained, and Atsushi was really starting to get a bad feeling about this.
“How?” Akutagawa asked for him, and Dazai’s grin grew impossibly larger.
Please, Atsushi silently begged to any deity who would listen to him, please don’t make the worst day of my life any worse.
Today also happened to be the day that Atsushi learned that even if deities did exist, none of them were on his side.
“It’s simple really,” Dazai was saying, still deathly amused.
“All you have to do is share just one little kiss.”
Now, let it be known that Atsushi wasn’t the type to curse much. At most, he’d mutter an aggravated ‘shit’ when he was in a life-threatening situation.
Well, he could technically consider this a life-threatening situation, so maybe his reaction wasn’t too absurd.
“What the fuck?”
“Language, Atsushi-kun!” Dazai replied, feigning disapproval. “What would Kunikida-kun say?”
Atsushi just stared at him, waiting for Dazai to say he was messing with them and tell them the real way to stop the ability. Waiting for Dazai to just nullify it himself.
“I am not engaging in such foolish activities. Let alone with myself.” Akutagawa spat out next to him, sounding offended. Atsushi’s attention was finally torn back to the man that was currently occupying his body.
“That can not be your only problem with this!” He exclaimed incredulously. Akutagawa didn’t even spare him a glance.
“Oh, but Akutagawa-kun~” Dazai spoke up, and Atsushi really wished he’d stop doing that.
“You wouldn’t be kissing your self, you’d be kissing Atsushi-kun~” It was obviously the wrong thing to say given the situation, for more reasons than one. Dazai didn’t seem to care.
Akutagawa went rigid and Atsushi held his breath for a long moment, briefly wondering if he’d live to see tomorrow. Ah, he wished he could’ve had one last bowl of chazuke before his inevitable end.
“I would rather repeatedly gut myself and bleed out than ever affiliate myself with the jinko in such a revolting manner, Dazai-san.” Akutagawa’s voice was cutting, leaving no room for arguments.
Dazai seemingly did not take the obvious social cue, his eyebrows raising in amusement before he continued to pester Akutagawa.
“Wow, I’m surprised Akutagawa-kun likes being stuck in Atsushi-kun’s body so much,” He said thoughtfully, “I guess you would rather just stay that way forever and never switch back, hm?”
Akutagawa’s lips were pressed into a thin line, and his eye had started twitching. Atsushi just kept wishing that he could have had that chazuke.
“Then again,” Dazai continued on with a gleam in his eye, blatantly ignoring the tense atmosphere of the room.
“All that time spent honing your ability, all that time training and failing and killing—I suppose it will all be for naught if you don’t return to your own body, don’t you agree?”
Akutagawa had frozen up again at his words, and Atsushi’s wariness only grew as he glanced between the two of them.
“Dazai-san, maybe you should just—” He started, figuring he had to say something if he had any dreams of seeing tomorrow.
“Hm, or maybe you’re just too cowardly to do it, then?” Dazai continued, ignoring Atsushi completely as he levelled Akutagawa with a hard expression.
Akutagawa’s fingers twitched.
“Dazai-san—” Atsushi tried, but his voice died in his throat when Akutagawa spun on him, a fire ignited in his eyes.
Before Atsushi could even open his mouth to get a word out, Akutagawa’s hands were gripping his shoulders in a near-vice grip.
“If you ever speak of this to anyone, I will cut your tongue out and feed it to you, jinko.” Akutagawa hissed, the threat in his tone very real.
“Speak of what—?” He started, and when Akutagawa leaned dangerously closer, he swore his life flashed before his eyes.
This was it. This was how he was going to die.
He squeezed his eyes shut in anticipation of the attack. Really, it wasn’t all that bad. He’d lived a good life.
Only, no attack came. Instead, it was something else entirely, something that had Atsushi’s eyes snapping open in an instant, because there was no possible way that what was happening was what he thought it was.
But, once again, no deities were on his side, because it was exactly what he had thought was happening. In that moment, he’d prefer this to be chalked up as a tactile hallucination, because he’d rather be losing his mind right now than have this be a reality.
Akutagawa had used his death grip on Atsushi’s shoulders in order to pull them closer together, and not in the I’m-going-to-slaughter-you-jinko type of together. No, not at all, though that would’ve been much preferred. Instead it was the I’m-going-to-kiss-you-with-the-most-murderous-aura-ever type of close. Atsushi was so very dead.
The worst part of this all—besides the fact that Akutagawa had slammed his face into Atsushi’s so forcefully that Atsushi could taste blood, and the fact that he was literally looking at his own face during this entire process—was the fact that it… wasn’t that bad.
Because, despite the fact that Atsushi was looking into his own eyes—due to the fact that neither of them had closed their eyes, resulting in some awkward, angry staring—he could see Akutagawa in them.
In short, it didn’t feel like he was kissing himself.
And that was the worst part of this terrible day, really. Because not only did he feel like he wasn’t kissing himself, he felt like he was kissing Akutagawa. But that wasn’t even the worst of it! Because he felt like he was kissing Akutagawa, and it wasn’t that bad.
What the hell was Atsushi supposed to do with that information?
Atsushi had all of these thoughts in a span of three seconds, because his train of thought was abruptly halted by the sensation of his mind catapulting out of his body. Violently. It was not a nice experience, it was one that he’d already had the displeasure of living through once today, and he was hoping to never have to repeat it after this second time.
His vision blurred and the room tilted around him, then his brain cut off from all of his senses for a brief moment of terrifying nothingness, before a flash of blinding light shot through his vision, and suddenly, he wasn’t kissing himself anymore.
No, this was much worse. Because now he really was kissing Akutagawa.
As he regained his senses, he locked eyes with Akutagawa, who no doubt experienced a similar situation to him when they swapped back.
There was a tiny moment where time was frozen, and they both stared at each other in equal states of disarray, their lips still locked together.
It wasn’t until Atsushi heard a low whistle that he snapped out of whatever trance he’d been in, and abruptly pulled away from Akutagawa, nearly tripping over his own feet as he fell backward.
He spun his head toward where the whistle had come from, his face rapidly heating up when his eyes landed on Yosano, who was watching him with a raised eyebrow.
“A little inappropriate for work, no?” She teased, and Atsushi went impossibly redder.
“Y—Yosano-san! It’s not what it looks like—”
“Cease your foolish ramblings, jinko.” Akutagawa finally spoke up, and Atsushi immediately felt the murderous intent rolling off of him in waves. He turned his head back to him cautiously, suddenly reminded of the fact that this was his death day.
“My, my,” Dazai spoke up, and Atsushi had nearly forgotten he was there at all. He felt a new wave of embarrassment when he realized that Dazai had witnessed that entire mess.
“Akutagawa-kun sure didn’t take a lot of convincing~” Dazai teased, for seemingly no reason but to rile Akutagawa up more. Was that Dazai’s plan? To have Akutagawa hunt and kill Atsushi for sport? Because if it was, it was working wonderfully so far.
Atsushi watched Akutagawa in silence, but Akutagawa’s expression was unreadable. What certainly wasn’t unreadable, though, was the pure malice radiating from him. Atsushi wondered what his odds of survival would be if Akutagawa activated Rashoumon right now.
“Never speak of this to anyone, jinko. I don’t go back on my word.” Akutagawa finally broke the silence, and Atsushi was momentarily reminded of his previous threat.
However, before he could even open his mouth to respond, Akutagawa was making his swift exit, brushing past Yosano as he headed through the door, his silent bloodthirsty aura more threatening than any of his words had been that day.
The three detectives stayed enveloped in silence for a long moment, before Yosano finally broke it with an amused expression on her face that reminded Atsushi just a little too much of Dazai in that moment.
“So? Anyone gonna explain what the hell that was about?”
After a long winded, certainly embellished, explanation from Dazai, one that Yosano had laughed at relentlessly, even poking and nudging at Atsushi—who was curled up in a ball at his desk as he tried not to think about… well, anything—during the parts she found funniest, Yosano finally granted him some mercy and left the room after sharing one last beguiled look with Dazai.
Maybe, Atsushi thought bleakly, maybe if he closed his eyes for long enough, he’d wake up in Kyouka’s closet and this would all have been a bad dream.
He knew it hadn’t been, but he could hope, couldn’t he?
Because of all the terrible, horrendous things in this world, of all the awful, life-threatening days Atsushi had had in his lifetime, this took the cake.
Because Akutagawa had kissed him. And he hadn’t hated it.
Atsushi let out an audible groan, his forehead planted firmly against the desk as he tried to will away all memories of the day.
“Atsushi-kun~” Dazai cooed from beside him, and Atsushi felt his presence shift closer as he no doubt leaned toward his desk.
Atsushi didn’t have to look up to picture the expression on Dazai’s face. Amused beyond belief, no doubt.
Atsushi bit back a helpless groan.
“At-su-shi-ku~n,” Dazai tried again, and Atsushi just buried his head further in his arms as he grumbled out a response that Dazai no doubt couldn’t hear.
“What was that, Atsushi-kun?”
Atsushi didn’t hold back his groan that time, finally lifting his head to send Dazai an exasperated look.
“Why did you make us do that?” He found himself asking impotently.
“Well, I have high hopes for you two, and your team work really could’ve used that extra push!” Dazai told him, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
He wanted to ask how that was supposed to improve teamwork, but he thought better of it.
“You two will be the next Double Black, after all.”
Atsushi let out a long sigh, sending Dazai an unimpressed look.
“What does our teamwork have to do with that? It’s not like you and Chuuya-san are…” Wait.
His voice trailed off as pieces clicked together in his mind, and he sent a wary look at Dazai. Sure enough, his mentor’s eyes were shining with amusement and… something else that Atsushi had come to recognize as a look that only appeared when Chuuya was brought up.
Oh, was that what it meant?
“It’s not like me and Chuuya are what, Atsushi-kun?” Dazai inquired, a grin growing on his face. Atsushi stared at him for another three seconds before letting out a helpless sigh and burying his face back into his arms.
“I don’t even want to know.” He muttered, and he heard Dazai’s light laughter in response.
He held back another sigh, resuming in his impossible endeavor of trying to give himself short term memory loss.
Today really was the worst day ever.