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Maria Gorey was going to add two more bodies to the table soon, if these two didn’t knock it off.
Apparently Professor Mikotoba’s daughter had only just arrived back in England, and was still reuniting with her old friends. She was called back to help Prosecutor Asougi with a particularly difficult case, and her upbringing meant she knew enough to assist in an autopsy.
One of her friends (well, anyone with eyes could tell they were a bit more than that) was the lead inspector for the case, too, meaning she got to observe the autopsy. And Inspector Lestrade did not have enough self control to be very helpful.
“Scalpel, please.” Dr. Gorey said.
Both assistants reached for a scalpel at the same time, their fingers brushing. They each laughed (giggled , thought Maria, unamused), drawing their hands back. Again they both reached for the scalpel at the same time. Inspector Lestrade’s face was so red that Dr. Gorey wanted to just cut it open and observe the blood vessels.
And now the detective and Mikotoba were just holding hands.
“Scalpel.” She repeated. “Ooh, or do either of you want to take the next turn laying on this table?”
Mikotoba gasped, and quickly handed the scalpel over, finally being competent for a second. Then she and Lestrade started whispering to one another, and it was like Maria had no assistants at all again.
With how delirious they were acting, Maria really, really wanted to take a good look at their brains. She wasn’t very interested in romance herself—she didn’t get it—but she wanted to know why in the world it made people act so useless. This was an autopsy , for God’s sake. Someone got murdered! And no one but her even wanted to look at the beautiful sliced open body before them!
“Bone saw, please.” She sighed, and just reached for it herself. “Inspector Lestrade!”
The woman turned. “Oh, wot? Sorry, I fink I spaced out somehow.” Mikotoba laughed.
“Can I see your arm, please?” Maria said. When Inspector Lestrade obliged, she picked up the bone saw and slowly approached the detective with it.
(And, obviously, she had no intent to start dissecting a living person. She outgrew that phase. But it wasn’t like these two lovestruck fools knew that.)
At the last possible second, Lestrade looked somewhere other than Mikotoba’s eyes and yanked her arm out of the way. “What the ‘ell?!”
Maria pulled up her mask, and stared at Gina. Then she turned back to the body, lowering it again and going back to work.
“Geez, geez, fine…” Lestrade grumbled “‘ave it your way. Slice 'im open!”
“Prosecutor Asougi, here’s the report you asked for.” Dr. Gorey handed it to Kazuma, who skimmed it.
“Thank you, Dr. Gorey.” He frowned. “Why are there little hearts in all of the margins?”
She sighed, pulling a knife out from each pocket, and hitting them together miserably. “Those two… Your friends, I think? They were practically canoodling on the table. Can I cut them open next time, pleaaaase?”
He pretended to consider it. “Hm, just one of them. Then you still have a smart assistant to work with.” Asougi laughed loudly. “But cut them some slack, will you? Not everyone’s able to keep a level head as well as you, Dr. Gorey.”
This was true in every sense; though she doubted Asougi was referring to her leveled-out heads, all in pristine condition, that she kept in jars in her workshop. Perhaps she'd go home and admire them, as a treat after having to deal with that pair.