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Eddie's place was quiet and silent, too silent for his liking.
Buck was not beside him talking about something weird or interesting he had discovered in a documentary or in a book and Eddie missed him so much.
Eddie was sitting on the couch, legs stretched out on the coffee table and a blanket wrapped around his body, lazily scrolling on his Instagram while Christopher was taking some snacks for their second movie of the night.
A little time with his son, watching Pixar movies, was the perfect end for a rough and grueling shift even if both of them missed their beloved Buck.
His fast and automatic scrolling stopped as he noticed a pic, suddenly interested in what he was seeing on the screen.
He barely heard Christopher saying something in the background and he forced himself to glance up at his son, pretending to be fine as his stomach clenched heavily.
“Dad, are you okay?”, the boy asked, offering him a handful of popcorn.
“Yeah, mijo… I was just… don’t worry, I’m ready for another movie!”, he answered, hoping that his voice sounded steadier than it really was.
Christopher nodded, sitting in his favourite spot on the couch, holding a cushion to his chest.
“Who is that guy?”, he asked after glancing at his dad’s phone, still in his hands.
Yeah, damn. That guy. That cute, smiling and kind guy named TK Strand or something.
“TK. He’s a paramedic and a firefighter. He lives in Austin and we worked together some months ago”, he answered, ignoring the jealousy stirring in his chest. “Remember when we went to Texas to help with the fires? We met him and his crew… Buck and TK kept in touch, they’re friends.”
Every single word was real and Eddie knew that he had nothing to worry about but he couldn’t get rid of the feeling anchored to his stomach since he saw that pic of Buck and TK, sitting in a bar. It was posted by Marjan and the caption said: “my friends are better than yours. #thehottestfirefightersintown #dumbassanddumbasser ”
Buck's smile was bright and warm even through the screen, his eyes as blue as the sky and he was wearing one of Eddie's favourite shirts. TK, beside him, was making a funny face and his arm was around Buck's shoulder, nothing strange but Eddie felt so jealous and he hated himself for that stupid feeling.
He had never been a jealous guy, he had always thought that jealousy was helpless and awkward and now he was there, in the middle of his living room, staring at a pic of his boyfriend with another man and he was freaking out.
"TK seems like a good guy, Dad. I'm happy for Buck, he is a great friend and he deserves great friends too but I miss him so much", the boy murmured, tucking into Eddie's lap. "I can't wait to see him again in two days."
Eddie sighed, caressing his son's curls as he smiled, feeling his heart warming.
"I miss him too", he admitted, closing his eyes for a moment.
They had been dating for four months now and he never stayed far from Buck for more than twenty four hours.
All that distance was crashing against him as a high speed train, no matter that he was in Texas helping the 126 to face an emergency, he missed his boyfriend. And he was jealous.
"By the way, I'm happy too but I'm sure he is missing his best friend. You are his favourite, mijo", he said, pressing play to the movie.
"And he is mine", Christopher giggled, shrugging as Eddie poked his side, pretending to be offended. "He makes me and my dad happy, of course he is my favourite."
Eddie smiled softly, holding his son as he tried to focus on the movie.
He accomplished his mission for about ten minutes, then he zoned out until he heard Chris shifting against his thigh and he noticed that his son was down for the count.
He turned off the tv, moving slowly and carefully to not wake Christopher up as he headed to the kitchen, grabbing his phone and glancing at the screen.
It was almost midnight and his lock screen, a pic of the three of them at Chris' birthday, made his heart beat faster, so he pressed the green button without hesitation and he waited for Buck to pick up his phone call.
"Hi baby", Buck greeted him happily and Eddie could imagine his soft smile. "I was about to call you, I'm opening the door of my room right now."
"God, I miss you so much", Eddie mumbled without thinking. "I know it's kinda pathetic but it's the truth, you've been in Texas for a week but I miss you and…"
"Babe", Buck murmured, sitting on the corner of the bed, so cold and empty without his human furnace named Eddie Diaz. "I miss you too and I can't wait to be home with my boys. It's not pathetic, you're adorable."
"So, I saw that you were enjoying your free time tonight", Eddie couldn't help but say, hoping he could get his words back the second he pronounced them.
"Mh", Buck's answer made Eddie sigh hard, aware that he would regret his statement soon. "Yeah, I was in a good company but I guess you already know."
Eddie scrubbed his face, leaning on the counter as he huffed noisily.
"It's not funny", he whined.
"Yes, it is. Your jealousy is so funny, Eds."
Eddie couldn't see Buck but he knew him so well, he could imagine every movement of his body as he was talking. He could imagine his sly smile and the way he smirked, wrinkling his nose as he bit his bottom lip.
"I'm not jealous. I don't know what you are talking about", he replied, acting like he was completely innocent.
"We are talking about TK", he answered bluntly, giggling as he heard Eddie's resigned sigh. "I know you are jealous Eds, you always are when it comes to TK but I told you a million times, you have nothing to worry about. He's just a friend and Carlos, his boyfriend, is a cop so I definitely don't want to piss him off. You can relax."
"So the only reason why I can relax is that TK is in a relationship with a cop? You're such a brat, Evan Buckley."
Buck laughed smugly, earning another huff from his boyfriend.
He adored bickering with him, especially because Eddie always cut him off with a soft kiss.
"You can relax because I love you, Eds", he murmured softly, the desire to hold him stronger than ever. "I know that you are jealous of TK even if you have never told me. I have to say, he's really cute and kind and a great person but he's not you. Yes, he's a true friend but you… you are the love of my life Eddie. I know you are more insecure than you want to admit but you don't have to be, not when it comes to us."
Eddie smiled as shivers ran through his veins, up and down his spine, on every inch of his skin. Buck’s words hugged him like a soft blanket, even if he was so far from him.
“I have nothing personal against TK but I was on the couch, watching a movie with Chris and I missed your arm around my waist, your warm body pressed against mine… I missed using your shoulder as a pillow and bothering you with my kisses along your jaw and neck and cheeks. I know, I’m a grown man and I’m supposed to handle some days away from my boyfriend but I miss you as hell. And then I saw that pic and I was jealous because TK was with you and I wasn’t. Any time without you is far too long.”
Buck couldn’t help but feel warmed by Eddie’s speech, so pure and simple but full of feelings. He rested his head on the pillow, closing his eyes for a moment.
“I can relate, babe… my bed is so empty without you, I hate sleeping alone”, he whined, quivering as he shifted under the sheets. “For the record, TK is really happy for us. He was the only one, except Maddie, who knew about my feelings for you and his advice helped me to be open with you", he added, struggling to keep his eyes open.
"Are you saying that I'll have to thank him? Karma is a bitch. How can I be jealous of a guy who helped my boyfriend to become… My boyfriend? Life sucks." Eddie answered dramatically as his smooth voice betrayed his attempt to look offended.
“You’re such a drama queen sometimes”, he teased, laughing softly.
“But you love me”, Eddie replied smugly, mirroring Buck’s laughter.
“Not so much but yes, I love you”, he joked, smiling so hard that his cheeks hurt. “Eds?”
“Yeah?”
“Ask me that.”
“What?”, he frowned, narrowing his eyes.
“Don’t be silly, you know what”, he grumbled slyly. “I know this is not how you were planning to ask me but I can’t wait anymore so please…”
Eddie caught in a breath, his heart bursting into his ribcage. He had tried that speech so many times in front of the mirror but now he couldn’t remember a single word and he felt his stomach clenching heavily, as he couldn’t hear anything but Buck’s breath.
“Wanna move in with us, mi amor?”, he asked, getting straight to the point. “You are basically living with us for months now… I mean, you have two drawers in our bedroom and your own space in the closet. Your toothpaste and your shaving cream are in the bathroom cabinet. I always buy your favourite cereals and biscuits, and your blueberry juice is in the fridge. Your jacket is hanging by the door and pictures of us are scattered all over the house… my house is not just mine anymore, it’s ours. And it’s not just a house, it’s a home. Our home.”
His voice cracked after the first phrase but he’s satisfied.
It wasn’t the speech he had tried plenty of times but it was authentic, full of his feelings for Buck.
“You won me over at the first question, babe”, Buck teased to hide his tears. “Of course I want to move in with you and Chris. You are my family and your home, well our home now, is the place I want to come back to every day.”
“I wish I could kiss you right now, that’s why I was planning to ask you in a few days”, he whined, biting his bottom lip. “I miss you more than before.”
Buck huffed slightly, wrinkling his nose as he closed his eyes.
He could see Eddie’s soft features. His full lips curved up in a bright smile, his defined jawline and his blushed cheekbones, the little wrinkles around his eyes and his frowning eyebrows, his fluff hair and the stubble on his cheeks.
“I’ve never missed someone as much as I miss you right now”, he confessed, aware that he had never loved anyone as much as he loved Eddie.
“Evan”, he murmured. “Do you really think I am the love of your life?”
“I do”, Buck replied without hesitation. “And I can’t wait to tell you in person, looking straight in those amazing hazel eyes of yours before stealing you a kiss, ‘cause words are unnecessary when I can kiss you.”
“Distance makes us way too sappy”, Eddie stated, earning a giggle from Buck. “You’re tired as hell, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, I’m exhausted but I could stay up all night for you”, he answered before a yawn cutted him off.
“I see”, he joked, making Buck pout. “Have some sleep, amor. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight Eds. Kiss Chris goodnight for me, I miss my boy so much.”
“He misses you too”, he said, looking at his son, still asleep on the couch. “Evan, wait. I… I think the same, you are the one, you have always been. The man of my life.”