Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Morgana didn't know how long she waited on the crest of the hill. It was long enough for her tears to dry up and her hair to become even more untamed by the wind than it already was. She couldn't believe it, she refused to believe it. After everything... everything that had brought them back together... She couldn't help but think back to all those years ago, when he was only a child. She had promised him that nothing bad would happen. Nothing bad would happen to him. Now here she was, weathered by years of mistreatment and loneliness, marking his grave with a few stones and a sword. 

"The battle's not over, Mordred. We will have our revenge."

They would pay, Arthur would die and Merlin... Merlin would die too, but only after he suffered as she suffered, felt the sting of betrayal and heartbreak like she had. He would die, but it would be slow. 

She turned away from the gravesite, ready to meet with the few remaining ranks of her army. However, she gave pause. She couldn't shake this strange feeling that had persisted ever since she reached this spot. It was almost as if something was watching her. Her heart skipped a beat. Could Emrys be on her trail now? Was he here? She stopped this train of thought quite quickly. It was foolish. Merlin would be coddling his dying king. 

No, this was something different. Something less finite. She tried to brush passed it, thinking of the long journey ahead. She could not allow Emrys to reach the Isle of the Blessed. 

But there it was again! A slight shift in the breeze, a quiet hum in the air, what was it?

"Who's there?" she called out, using a voice haggard by the battlefield. 

"Hello, Morgana."

She whirled around, coming face to face with none other than Mordred, only it wasn't Mordred. He appeared the way he had the day they'd met. A light blue cloak billowed in the wind around his shoulders and blood dripped from the wound in his side. 

"Mordred?"

It sighed and spoke in a young Mordred's voice. "No, not Mordred."

"Then-"

It held up a hand. "I know you must have many questions, but there is no time for me to answer them all, nor, is it necessary for you to understand everything."

"Who are you?"

The being smiled. "I cannot give you a who, I cannot give you a what, but for your sake, I'll give you a name." It extended a small hand. "You may call me Kyulds if it pleases you." 

"Kyulds?"

"Yes." Kyulds said, peering behind the high priestess. "I am sorry for your loss. I know he meant much to you."

"He was the last thing I had."

"I know. It must be painful, living with the knowledge that Mordred is someone you'll never see again. How many people have you lost in this battle. How many more will you lose."

"As many as it takes," Morgana said through clenched teeth. "But none of that matters now. There's no one left for me to care for. No one for me to look up to, no one for me to guide. Even Aithusa has left me in favor of Emrys. I am only trying to take my rightful place on the throne! I was only trying to return this kingdom to something like it used to be! Somewhere where people like me could be safe."

"But you strayed so far from the path, my dear Morgana. Hardships and obstacles stood in your way as you desperately tried to cling to a crumbling world. It was a task too great for anyone."

Morgana's expression became steely. "But I haven't failed yet. Arthur still lives. I will snuff his life away and then I will bury Emrys somewhere he will never see the light of day again!"

Kyulds clicked his tongue. "Morgana, I am going to confide something in you..."

She stared at him curiously. 

"I am not something to be trifled with, nor, am I necessarily a human being. It is because of this, that I know how things transpire, how things dissipate. Morgana, if you pursue Emrys and his king now, Emrys will kill you. I have seen it. There is no place for you in this world, in this time, where you can do any good. Emrys will be your doom one way or another."

"He won't be expecting me. I'll catch Merlin off guard-"

"Yes, indeed you will, but it won't stop Excalibur from being driven into your chest."

"How can you possibly claim to know such things!?" 

"Emrys is your destiny, Morgana, and he is your doom. You were warned, but failed to heed that warning."

"That is nonsense!" Morgana said, her tone becoming more aggravated. "I spent years searching for Emrys!"

"And yet you failed. Admit it, Morgana. Although the idea of Emrys terrified you, you never truly believed there could be someone who could overpower you."

"You don't know-"

"Oh, but I do. Don't deny me."

Morgana paused for a moment. Digesting Kyulds' words. "I may have... become ambitious, but... there's still time. Thank you for your warning. I will not go into this interaction without great caution, I-"

The Mordred like being held up his hand. "It is too late, Morgana. You will die here, you always do. You have set your destiny in stone."

"Who are you?"

Kyulds chuckled, a strange sound coming from a child's lips. "I promise you, I am not someone to be feared. I wish to help you."

The witch stared at him, skeptically. "How can you help me?"

"I have certain... knowledge that might pertain to your struggle."

"Go on," now she was intrigued.

"I can take everything back. I can manipulate the very flow of time itself."

"What do you mean."

"I can take it back. I can take it all back." He looked at her with a wicked glint in his eye, a glint that looked at home in a young Mordred's eyes. "I can rewind it. I can take you back to a time before the battle of Camlann, before King Uther's timely demise, before Morgause's death, before... before anything you wish."

"Im- no, impossible."

"Not impossible."

"There must be a catch."

"No catch."

She narrowed her eyes. "You must have an agenda."

He shook his head. "No agenda," he said, although Morgana thought she saw something flash beneath his steely gaze. "I only wish to see you succeed in your plight."

"I can... I can have a second chance?"

He nodded. 

"I can live everything again... but now..."

"But now, you'll know." 

"But now, I'll know."

He nodded again. "You'll keep your mind, but everything will be like it was. Emrys will be at your mercy. He'll be young..."

"Easily manipulated."

"Easily killed," Kyulds said with a resounding tone. 

Morgana turned away, thinking about her situation. "This seems too easy, it seems false. Why are you willing to do this for me for nothing?"

"I don't have to answer your questions." He took a menacing step closer to the witch. "In fact, you don't need to believe me. I'm not asking for your permission."

"What?"

"This is what's best. I know that. I'm only asking out of courtesy. I will send you back no matter how you feel about it. I will not allow you to make the foolish decision to refuse me."

Morgana took a few tentative steps back. Kyulds followed. 

"Where would you like to go, Morgana? When would you like me to drop you?"

"I- I-"

"Better choose wisely. I won't have the energy to give you a third chance for a long time. Bringing you back will take a great deal of strength, I will need time to recover."

"Right before the battle of Camlann then. When I confronted Merlin in the cave!" Morgana blurted out. 

Kyulds shook Mordred's head. "Not far enough, Morgana. Destiny already has its filthy grip by then."

Morgana thought about her life in Camelot, before Morgause was mortally wounded and she was forced to flee the city. She remembered her luxurious dresses, her frequent baths, the servants, the meals... She found the perfect moment. She looked back at the form of the young boy. "I want to be taken to the first time I met Morgause. When she came to Camelot to challenge Arthur. That is the moment I choose!"

Kyulds smiled. "Now that... that is a most pliable moment."

"Is there a spell I have to learn? What do I have to do?"

"Nothing," Kyulds said, making his way towards the witch. He placed his hand on her forehead. "Nothing."

A piercing ring became louder and louder in Morgana's head. She closed her eyes and covered her ears, trying to make it stop. She felt like she was falling, falling into nothing. Her limbs flailed wildly about as she tried to find anything she could hold onto. Her lungs filled with empty space and contracted in, rejecting the things around her. She was terrified, thinking Kyulds had tricked her in some way. The last thing she saw before she lost conscious completely, was a concerned face staring over her. 

"Morgana?" Came a voice. It sounded familiar. "My Lady, are you alright?" 

Morgana's world faded into darkness.

Chapter Text

Morgana was awake before she opened her eyes. She tested her surroundings, feeling her clean skin against soft silk sheets. It was a feeling she recognized and a feeling she thought she would never experience again. She remembered the countless sleepless nights, lying awake, terrified of falling asleep and being plagued by nightmare after nightmare. She remembered the time in which she thought she would go mad and was unaware her nightmares were the product of magical prophecies. It was a simpler existence, a simpler time. She had her friends in the day and was terrified only of the night.  

She ran her fingers under her pillow and felt for the bottle of sleeping draft she used to keep there. She found it. Had this really worked? Was she really getting another chance?

She jumped and opened her eyes wildly at the sound of a quiet knock at the door, a reaction obtained from years of living alone in a hovel. 

"Morgana?" Came a voice from behind the door. "Morgana, I've come to wake you and bring you breakfast. May I enter?"

"Give me a moment!" Morgana called. She got out of bed and hurried over to her closet, throwing on the first dress she could find. "Enter!"

In came the maidservant, dressed in a light blue dress with floral embroidery on the chest. She wore a smile on her face and her hair was pulled back into a messy bun. She carried a tray full of delicious fresh breakfast foods. "Good morning, my Lady, How are you feeling."

"Good, thank you," Morgana responded, slightly shocked and confused.

"Well, that's a relief," she said, placing the tray down on the table and making her way to each window to open the curtains. "Gaius said all you needed was a good nights rest, but you know me. I always assume the worst."

"Why should I need rest?"

"Oh, last night you were having dinner with the king and... you don't remember?"

Morgana shook her head. 

"You fainted out of your chair. Probably made tired from all your nightmares. I do hope Gaius finds something stronger for you so you can get some sleep."

"Right."

"You should find some time today to see the king. He was very worried to see you that way last night."

"Oh," Morgana's stomach lurched at the thought of Uther. The knowledge that he was somewhere in the vicinity, somewhere in the citadel made her slightly sick. 

"Are you alright?"

"Yes," Morgana assured her, plastering on the fake smile that had served her well during her time as a double agent. 

Gwen smiled back before staring at the state of Morgana's attire. She giggled. "What on earth are you wearing?"

Morgana stared back, perplexed. "A dress...?"

"Yes, but you've put it over your nightgown. Now it's all bunched."

Morgana looked into the mirror across the room. Gwen was right. The purple gown bunched up around her waist and shoulders. Come to think of it, it had felt slightly strange on her body. Not only because it was put on incorrectly. She was so used to sleeping in the only dress she had, leading her to forget what it meant to be Uther's ward. 

Gwen helped her out of the elegant dress and nightgown before choosing a more suitable outfit for the day. Morgana watched as the girl worked. The maidservant hummed to herself as she mended a small patch of fabric that had torn. There wasn't a notion of the queen the girl would become. Morgana wanted to be angry with her, but just couldn't bring herself to be so. She had always wanted Gwen to be her friend. It wasn't always clear, but she thought it was made evident by the efforts she made to secure the queen as an ally. Maybe it was cruel, maybe it was selfish, but the lone high priestess was desperate for a friend. This young maid would be spared of her wrath, Morgana decided. She would prove an ally and a friend for her in this new world she hoped to build. 

<<o>>

Out of her chambers and walking the halls, Morgana felt like she was floating through some sort of dream. She passed servants who had familiar faces, but forgotten names, nobles who smiled as she passed as opposed to cowering in fear, and a long past age of peace and security surrounding the entire atmosphere. She stared at every servant as they past, searching for the dark hair and prominent ears, the blue eyes that had stared her down with unwavering power and determination.

"Merlin!" There was Arthur's voice echoing down the hall. A moment later he became visible at the end of the corridor. "Ahh, Morgana, are you feeling better."

She didn't answer, startled by how young and alive he looked, yet to be burdened with the responsibility of an entire kingdom. 

"Morgana?" he tried again.

"Oh yes, sorry. I'm feeling much better, thank you." In truth, her head had never felt more heavy.

"Good." He began to continue on his way, but stopped and called back to her. "Have either of you, by any chance, seen my useless toad of a servant?"

When again Morgana didn't answer, Gwen stepped forward. She sighed, "You shouldn't be so mean, but no, I haven't seen him."

"Well, if you do, tell him if he's not there to help me prepare for the knighting ceremony tonight, he'll land himself in the stocks for a week."

Gwen rolled her eyes when he turned away. "I will deliver the message."

As Arthur stalked off, the two women continued their walk. Gwen was the first to speak.

"Do you think you could speak to him, Morgana? I know much of that talk goes both ways, but I think a lot of the time it hurts Merlin's feelings even if he doesn't let on. Arthur can be too mean, not to mention how he burdens Merlin with more work than five men could handle. I don't know how he manages..."

"I think I have an idea," Morgana muttered under her breath. 

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"Nothing," she said quickly. "I think you have nothing to worry about, Gwen. Merlin can handle himself." She cringed as her words fell out of her mouth. They were noticeably bitter.

The maidservant furrowed her brow. "Did something happen? Are you angry with him? Last we spoke about it you were quite fond of him, thought it was sweet he brought you flowers after that fire."

Morgana had forgotten about the flowers Merlin had brought her. Little did Gwen know he had done much more than that, figuring out a way for her to get to the druids when she needed it most. A pathetic attempt to help. She needed more than just a nudge in the right direction. How many hours of feeling alone and helpless could have been avoided if Emrys had had the courage to tell her she wasn't alone? Every ounce of her pain and suffering led back to Emrys, led back to Merlin. 

Again she thrust on her false smile. "No, I'm not angry with Merlin. Sorry, you're right. I'll speak to Arthur about it. Although, I doubt it'll make a difference."

"Is there something else troubling you?" Gwen asked suddenly. 

"What, no... why do you think that?"

"Forgive me... it's just," she bit her lip in a way that only Gwen could, "You've been acting strange all morning, ever since you woke up." She shook her head and held her temple. "Sorry, I'm probably imagining it."

Morgana put a hand on her arm. "No... no, you're not imagining it. It's just a sign that you know me so well."

"What is it?" She looked concerned. 

"Merely a slight headache," she lied. "Probably something left from my fainting last night. Nothing to worry about. I'll return to Gaius later."

"Oh, alright. If that's really it..."

"It is," Morgana insisted. "I'm perfectly fine."

The pair stopped outside the doors to the council chamber.

"If you don't need me," Gwen inclined her head respectfully. "I have other duties that I must attend to."

Morgana nodded in return. "Be on your way."

The maidservant made her way back down the hall, disappearing through a servant's side door. Morgana stared at the heavy doors, a battle raging inside her skull. If she saw Uther now, would she be able to refrain herself from murdering him on the spot? The question seemed silly, but after all the hardship and genocide she had witnessed...

No, killing him right away would not be a smart move to make. It would raise too many alarm bells. People would be after her in an instant and before she could escape, Emrys would take care of her. She had to keep her cover. She had to take care of the wretched serving boy first. She turned away from the large wooden doors and down several flights of stairs. If Merlin wasn't with Arthur, then he would be with Gaius in the physicians chambers. She had an excuse to visit Gaius anyway. It was perfect. 

She reached the door and knocked. 

"Enter," she heard the old man's voice from inside. 

She did, peering cautiously into the room. 

"Why, come in my dear. I didn't realize you would be coming to see me today. Are there any recurrences of your fainting spell last night? I believe it must have been caused by lack of sleep. I am increasing the dosage of you sleeping draft as we speak." He gestured to a green liquid building over an open flame. 

"Thank you, Gaius. Umm... no I feel fine today, thank you. I was actually..." she craned her neck to look over his shoulder, trying to catch a glimpse of possible movement from Merlin's room. "I was looking for-"

She was interrupted by a loud bang as a figure came bursting from Merlin's room. 

"Gaius!" It shouted. "Why didn't you wake me up?!"

"It shouldn't be my job," Gaius said calmly, stirring the sleeping draft. "You should be able to get yourself up."

Merlin rolled his eyes, exasperated, at the old man. "Well, you might as well," he mumbled, rushing over the cabinet to find any spare food. When he turned around, mouth full of food, he caught Morgana's eye. "Oh, hello."

"Finish your food before you speak. Please, refrain from embarrassing me."

"Sorry," he said, continuing to rush about the room, collecting things he would need for the day. "Gaius, did you see where I put Arthur's boots? He needs them for tonight."

"My boy..."

"Never mind, I found them!" his muffled voice called. His face reappeared as he carried a pair of freshly polished boots. 

"Arthur came looking for you this morning. I told him you were garnering herbs."

"Great," Merlin said sarcastically. "I'll be in the stocks for a week. He knows the garnering herbs excuse!" Again he came face to face with Morgana. "Oh hello," but before Morgana could even get in two words, he was out the door and gone from sight, leaving the door bouncing and swinging on its hinges.

"It shouldn't be my job to come up with excuses!!" Gaius shouted after his ward. He sighed and returned to his work. "What is it you were looking for, my Lady?"

"Oh, nothing. I just wanted to thank you I suppose," she said slightly winded, out of breath from just watching the serving boy. 

"You're very welcome, my dear. I am always here if you need me."

She nodded before heading out. Gaius, although not a friend, he would always be loyal to Merlin, could be an invaluable resource. He was a knowledgeable man. Knowledge of any sort could be useful to her. 

Morgana thought for a moment. Perhaps... Gaius could be forced into her favor, but that was something to ponder at a later date. After all, Morgana had all the time in the world. 

She hurried down the hall, intent on catching up with the serving boy. She would do it now. It was almost too easy. She spotted him at the end of the corridor.

"Merlin!" she called out, attempting to sound friendly. 

He turned, almost losing his balance with all of Arthur's belongings he carried in his arms. "Yes?"

"I want to speak with you about something."

"Oh, alright!" He waited for her at the end of the hall as she approached. 

She couldn't help but let loose a signature wicked smirk. Luckily, he didn't notice. She began to mutter under her breath. "Arbredwian bréotan Angnes hearm..." She waited for the affects to take hold, for Emrys to crumple to the floor writhing in pain, for the blood to leak out of his eyes and careen through the cracks in the stone, but to her surprise he simply smiled at her as she reached him. 

"Did you say something? I heard muttering."

"Uhh-"

"Are you feeling better? It was pretty scary last night." He smiled, slightly embarrassed. "I had to catch you. You fell pretty suddenly." He looked around to make sure they were alone. "Gaius said it had something to do with lack of sleep, but I wasn't sure. I thought it might have something to do with your... magic," he mouthed. 

Morgana blinked at him in surprise, still trying to figure out what had gone wrong with her spell. 

"Don't worry! I didn't tell anyone! You know your secret's safe with me."

"Right... yes..." she responded, reminding herself that at this point in time Merlin knew of her magic. 

"So...?" Merlin asked curiously. "Do you think it had something to do with it?"

"Umm... yes," Morgana said, out of lack of a better explanation.

"Oh." His eyes widened slightly. "Well, if you want, I can-"

"MERLIN!!!"

"I have to go!" He said, already getting ready to run in the direction of the shout. He yelled back over his shoulder. "But we can discuss this later if you want!" He disappeared around a corner. 

Morgana remained, unsure of what to do. Why had her spell not worked? What had gone wrong? The words had not been muddled, it was not like her to mess up a spell. She looked at a tapestry hanging on the wall next to her. She held out her hand. "Byrne," she whispered. Nothing. "Byrne!" she said again, more forcefully. Nothing. The fabric should have been engulfed in flames. Panicking now, she looked around her searching for any explanation. Had something gone wrong when she was brought back? Had Kyulds unintentionally or intentionally messed something up? Things had been going unreasonably smoothly until now. Maybe his intentions were malicious. Her heart rate and her breathing were out of control. You need to calm down! she repeated in her head. You have to calm down or you'll cause a seen. 

Suddenly, smash!!

A decorative vase a few feet away from her shattered into sharp pieces. Her breathing and her heart rate began to quiet. So, she still had her magic. She thought back to her time living in the citadel, magic only occurring around her through accidents in moments of great stress. She was unable to control it. Only her mind would remain intact, Kyulds had said. Perhaps her magic still needed time to develop in this time. She sighed in frustration. This was a question to ask Morgause. 

<<o>>

The council chamber was crowded with nobles and their servants. The warm glow of candles created a merry, but foreboding atmosphere, blocking out the cool energy of the full moon. 

"Arise, Sir Vidor, knight of Camelot. Arise, Sir Caridog, knight of Camelot." There was slight sound of metal against metal as Uther's sword touched each new knight's armored shoulders. "You've been accorded a great honor and with that honor comes great responsibility." He paced in front of the five young men. "From this day forth, you are sworn to live by the knights code. You have pledged to conduct yourselves with nobility, honor, and respect. Your word is your sacred bond. You will find no one that better embodies these values than my son, Arthur. Follow his example and you will prove yourselves worthy of your title."

Arthur puffed out his chest at the mention of his name, but kept his gaze steely and unchanging.  

Sudden bangs and shouts echoed from the corridor beyond the door. They boomed open and in strolled a confident knight whose face was concealed by a helmet. 

Arthur ushered his knew men behind him and drew his sword, ready to protect his father and his men. His expression remained hard, his eyes blazing into the intruder. 

The intruder stopped in front of the prince and removed their gauntlet, tossing it, almost carelessly, at Arthur's feet. 

Every member of the court wore a concerned and apprehensive expression as Arthur knelt down and scooped up the gauntlet, unfazed by the challenge. "I accept you challenge. If I am to face you in combat do me the courtesy of revealing your identity. "

The intruder bent her head and removed the helmet, revealing the long blonde hair and distinctive features of the high priestess. "My name is Morgause."

Morgana remembered the first time she ever laid eyes on Morgause. It had been on this very night. She recalled being plagued by the feeling of familiarity that came with the strange woman. Now, she only smiled, reassured in the fact that soon she would be reunited with her beloved sister. 

Chapter Text

"Who is she? Why would she challenge Arthur?" Gwen asked the room as she made her way around Morgana's bed, preparing everything for the night. "Seems no one's ever heard of her."

Morgana smiled to herself as she watched Morgause swing her sword in the courtyard below, remembering this very conversation when she shared her strange feeling about the woman with her maidservant. "I feel as though I've met her somewhere before," she said, playing along with the memory.

"Really? Where could you know her from?"

"I don't know."

<<o>>

She waited until Gwen was long gone and the castle, for the most part, had quieted before slipping out of bed and into a  thin shall. As she pulled the elegant scarf from the wardrobe she couldn't help but feel a slight sense of elation rise in her chest. Her wardrobe was chock full of cloths and accessories, giving her ample choices and ravish attire. It was not unlike the opportunities and resources presented to her by this second chance. She shuddered, remembering the days when she had to scrounge for a plan and the necessities needed to survive. But now, possible paths to victory seemed to branch off in every direction from where Morgana was standing. All she had to do was pick one that would bring her the most pleasure and satisfaction. 

She remembered the room where her sister had stayed. Unfortunately, it was located on the opposite side of the citadel, undoubtably Uther wanting to protect his beloved ward from a strange woman who could present a threat. She passed the occasional curious guard on her way, but was able to convince them she was just out on an evening stroll to relax. After all, many of the guards who took the night shift were familiar with her frequent night terrors and sleepless nights. It wasn't too hard for them to believe. 

When she reached the door, she knocked lightly, knowing how easily startled her sister could be. 

"Enter," she heard her voice from inside. She did. 

Morgause, who was loosening an armored cufflink around her wrist, looked up in surprise. "The Lady Morgana... what a surprise." She approached warily. 

Morgana felt tears blossoming in her eyes and before she could stop herself, she flung her body into Morgause's arms and began to sob. "I- I'm sorry," she choked. "I know you must be very confused."

Morgause said nothing, but cautiously chose to return the embrace. 

When they finally broke apart, Morgana still clutched her arms, not wanting to ever let go. "Morgause, you cannot know how much I have missed you." The formerly blossoming tears, now poured down her face. 

"Missed me?" Morgause asked, perplexed. 

"You'd better sit down," Morgana suggested, laughing to herself. What she was going to explain to her sister was going to sound absurd. 

The pair sat down on the lavishly furnished bed, Morgana still never letting go. 

She took a steadying breath. "I'm going to begin by telling you what I know. I know that you're my half sister and I know that you're a high priestess." She waited for this information to sink into Morgause's eyes before she continued. "I know that I have magic as well and that I can use it in the fight against Uther." She paused. 

"And how do you know these things?"

"Because... because I've lived it before. I've seen years into the future."

"You've seen the future? Like our mother's gift?..." Her hand drifted to her bracelet. 

"No, I haven't dreamt the future. I've lived it. I lived years into the future and I've seen how it all ends. I've watched you die, seen Camelot's moments of weakness and moments of strength. When I thought I could go no further and when I thought that all hope for our vision of the future was lost, I was approached by some sort of being who called itself Kyulds. Kyulds said he could grant me a second chance to go back and relive my past so I could change the future as I see fit. Armed with the knowledge of the future, Morgause, we will be unstoppable."

Morgause broke away and stood. "Wait... no, manipulating time... it's impossible."

"I was skeptical at first too," she insisted, rising with her sister, trying her hardest to connect. "I was going to refuse him, believing it to be some sort of trick, but he said that he wasn't asking. He was going to send me back either way. I chose to return to the moment I met you."

Morgause shook her head. "If this is all true..."

"It is."

"Then... then..." she sat down again, processing the information.

"I know it must be a lot to take in..."

"You've understated it."

"I wish there was a better way to bring this upon you, but there are pressing matters I wish to discuss that are time sensitive and-"

There was a creak at the door which caused both women to jump. Morgause was up in an instant, sword ready and at the chest of the intruder. 

"What do you want?"

"I have a message from prince Arthur!" stuttered a flabbergasted Merlin. "He wants you to withdraw your challenge. Arthur has no desire to fight you. Now, if you withdraw he will grant you safe passage from the kingdom. Leave, now, while you still can."

She eyed him skeptically."If Arthur has no desire to fight me, then perhaps he should withdraw."

He laughed nervously. "No, he'll never do that, it's not in him to withdraw." It was in this moment that the serving boy spotted Morgana sitting on the bed. He eyed her with suspicious curiosity, but his main focus remained on the sword at his chest.

Morgause relaxed her grip on the blade. "Then we have that in common."

"If you fight him, he will have to treat you as he does any other opponent. It won't matter that you're a woman," he said, cringing slightly at the words as if ashamed to repeat his masters ignorant statement.  

"I do not ask for special treatment." She tossed her sword onto the bed.  

"Arthur has no quarrel with you. Why would you challenge him?"

She eyed him maliciously. "My reasons are not your concern."

"Don't put Arthur in a position where he's forced to kill you."

"Who's to say Arthur's life won't rest in my hands?"

"Right..." Merlin trailed off. Again his eyes fell on Morgana. He seemed to be trying to ask her a question with his eyes. "I'll let the prince know then," but he didn't move, begging Morgana to follow him out.

"Leave, boy!!"

"Right! Sorry!" he said hastily before scurrying out the door. 

After the door thudded shut and his footsteps faded into nothing, Morgause felt it safe enough to return to her sister. She sat next to her on the bed. 

"You spoke of matters that are time sensitive?"

"Indeed, but in order for you to understand you must know what I have been through and what I have seen."

"You'd better make haste of it then. I must be well rested for my battle with Arthur tomorrow."

Morgana shook her head. "You shouldn't bother. Nothing came of your plan."

She narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean? In four days time, Uther will be dead by his own son's hand and the kingdom will be thrown into chaos."

"No, Arthur returns from your quest and refrains from killing his father."

"What? How is that possible?"

"We don't know... I, of course, have my suspicions. I'm sure Emrys was involved-"

Morgause's head jerked at the name. "Emrys?"

"I'd better tell you the whole story." 

She did, and by Morgause's request, she left in even the most seemingly insignificant details. Her sister interrupted her occasionally, either asking a question or remarking at her sister's resilience, but fell silent when Morgana finally reached the end. 

"That's when I came to the hill to bury Mordred. The rest, I've already told you. I was approached by Kyulds."

The sisters sat in silence for a moment, Morgause giving Morgana time to recover from an hour of speaking and Morgana giving Morgause time to digest the information. 

Morgause rose and paced slowly in front of the ornate fire place. "So, that boy who came in here, that unassuming boy, that was...?"

"Yes. He's destined to be my doom."

"We won't let that happen," Morgause said firmly. 

"That's what I told myself the last time."

"Right," she said, moving closer to Morgana and lowering herself to her knees while Morgana remained on the bed. They clasped hands. "But now, I'm here. I would never let anything bad happen to you."

Morgana winced at the memory of those words tumbling out of her mouth, southing a young Mordred. The words didn't help him.

Again Morgause rose and returned to her pacing. "Emrys... it is a name I've heard before."

"Yes, an old druid legend. I discovered this early on with relief. I thought the druids would take my side, but they protected the identity of Emrys with their lives."

"It is not surprising. Emrys is a very important figure in their culture. He is supposed to be the most powerful sorcerer ever to walk the earth. It is rumored that he would be a warlock and a dragonlord too."

"Well, he certainly had a way with Aithusa."

"Based on your description, Aithusa was very young when she came into your care. Emrys would have been the one to hatch her."

The pit in Morgana's stomach deepened as she realized her only friend in those dark days had been more loyal to Emrys than to her. She truly had been alone.

Morgause, recognizing the look of despair darken on her sister's face tried to comfort her. "You mustn't worry about that now. It is in the past... or... the future... it is no matter." She put a hand on each shoulder, looking her straight in the eyes. "The world is in your control now Morgana. You know what everyone else does not. You can decide your own destiny as you see fit."

"That's what worries me. What if I choose wrong and I make things worse than they were in the first place?!"

"It's alright, you won't. That's what I'm here for. Together, we will think our every move through, we will comb over it with a fine tooth comb. However, Morgana... you must act exactly as you did all those years ago. For now, you must do everything the same."

"Why?"

"If something occurs that deviates the timeline, even slightly, our advantage could be lost. We would no longer have consistent or adequate knowledge of the future. Be honest, since you arrived in this time, have you performed exactly as you had done?" she asked urgently.

She thought for a moment. "No, I've done things slightly different, but nothing that could set off a chain of events."

"We can't be sure of that!" she snapped. "Sorry, this is just important, Morgana. I want what's best for you, what's best for us..."

"No, I'm the one that should be sorry. I shouldn't have been so foolish."

"What has been different?"

"Well, the fainting. That I had no control over. When I was transported back to this time, I'm told that I fainted while dining with Uther. Gaius had to look me over to ensure nothing was wrong."

"Go on,"

"Gwen told me I was acting strange. Probably because I'm a different person from what I was... I tried to kill Merlin using magic, but it failed. I think my magic has defaulted back to a state it used to be in. I don't seem to have the control that I mastered after years of study."

"That can be remedied with the proper practice. Anything else?"

"This conversation, and I'm sure I wasn't in the room when Merlin interrupted you last time. He seemed to be confused by my presence."

"Is that it?"

"I believe so..."

"Alright..." she returned to her pacing by the fire. "I will continue my plan as I would have done otherwise. Even if we know it doesn't work, we need to keep events intact."

"Agreed."

She paused. "Tell me, was there any interaction between us during this visit?"

Morgana nodded. "Yes, I introduced myself and you left me mother's bracelet to help control my nightmares."

Morgause slipped the band off her wrist and handed it to her sister. "There you are then. Guard it well."

"I will."

"Now, I hate to see you go, but you must leave me. I must be well rested for tomorrow."

"I will leave you to your bed, but please," she said imploringly. "I have just reunited with you. Don't let our next meeting be too far into the future. I will need someone to speak to about all this or I'll go mad. 

"I will meet you in the darkling wood in two weeks time, at midnight. We can discuss more then." She stroked Morgana's cheek lightly with her hand, admiring her sister. "I know it might seem like a long time, but it's what I need. I planned to visit an old friend and I must keep that future interaction intact." 

"I understand." She gave Morgause one last tight hug before slipping through her chamber door. 

<<o>>

"Come on Merlin, what's troubling you?"

He smiled at his guardian. "Nothing."

"No, don't give me that answer. I know you too well."

"Well," Merlin began as he cleared both their empty plates from the small wooden table. "It's just... I'm worried about the fight tomorrow. That's all." He gave one of his cheeky grins before heading up to his room.

"If you're sure that's all..."

"It is." 

As he turned away from the physician, instantly his smile faltered. He was not alright. All through dinner he had been silent, thinking. Something strange was going on. First, Morgana had expressed concern about her magic, positing that it had something to do with her unexpected fainting spell. He wouldn't be surprised if that was the case. When he had caught her before she hit the floor the night prior, her skin had been ice cold. He was the one to rush her down to Gaius, but by the time he got there, her skin had returned to normal. Gaius was skeptical of his claims thinking that he must of exaggerated, but Merlin knew what he felt. 

Then, he had seen Morgana in a room, alone, with the female stranger. What could she have possibly been doing in there? His mind wracked, trying to put any or all of the pieces together, but it just didn't make sense. Were all these events connected? or was the timing of it all just coincidental? He certainly didn't know. 

Then there was the feeling that had persisted ever since Morgana had fainted. A feeling familiar, but also alien. How could it be both at the same time? It was a comfort, but a danger. Something was watching him. Something was present. He glanced around the room. 

"Hello?" he whispered. "Who's there?" He scoffed at himself for being so silly. He was just being paranoid, as usual. 

But then, he thought, when has a funny feeling of mine ever not been right about something? 

Despite his stress, he was able to fall asleep quite quickly, leaving the room with only the peaceful sound of the wind outside. A candle on his bedside table flickered and died quite suddenly. Then came the voice, hushed and weak. 

"I'm here, Merlin. You don't know it now, but you'll know soon enough." 

But Merlin, lost in a land of dreams, was none the wiser the the strange voice whispering in his ear. 

Chapter Text

To Morgana's relief, the fight played out exactly like it was supposed to, with Morgause's sword at Arthur's chest. The crowd, especially Uther looked on in abject horror as Morgause said something to the prince, then backed away, satisfied with his answer.

Before she retreated from the arena, she caught Morgana's eye. A mutual understanding passed between them.

Morgana walked beside Gwen as the crowd filed from the stands. The maid was smiling.

"What's got you so happy?" Morgana asked, remembering she had once said something similar. 

Gwen's grin only grew wider. "Our worries can be resolved now, can't they... Prince Arthur isn't dead!"

"Indeed."

"And... I think he might have learned a lesson about underestimating certain opponents."

"I believe he has." she smirked. 

<<o>>

The next few days were quite uneventful. To the surprise delight of Morgana, she spent a quite a bit of her time with Gwen, meandering the grounds and garden's of the citadel and wandering the streets and colorful vendors in the lower town.

Of course, Uther had been in a rage when he found Arthur had disobeyed him and ventured off, keeping his word to Morgause, but Morgana knew by now how to stay out of his way. 

However, as she knew he would, Arthur returned safely and nothing was said of the prince showing any homicidal tendencies toward his king, or at least none that she had noticed. 

She was slightly ashamed to admit it, but Morgana was having a pleasant time reliving her peaceful past - that is, until something happened that she wasn't counting on. 

She had given Gwen the evening off and found herself high in the battlements, looking out over the vast city. 

"Morgana?"

She turned hastily, not expecting any disturbance. "Oh, Merlin..." Her heart rate quickened. Merlin had not approached her before, not on this day. What was she to do?

"I wanted to umm..." he stumbled over his words. His bright young eyes flitted about their surroundings, landing anywhere but Morgana's face. "I wanted to speak to you about... you know... I want to make sure you're okay..."

"Oh," Morgana stared, trying to read his expression. 

"Will you allow me?"

"I suppose so," she said of of curiosity. 

"You seemed upset the other day and I wanted to know if there was something troubling you." Finally he made eye contact. "Do you really think magic had something to do with your fainting spell?"

She hesitated. That is what she had said, but not what she wanted him to believe. Her insides writhed with a mixture of guilt and hate as she was transfixed by the genuine concern housed in Merlin's innocent expression. "Oh, no... I was just confused the other day. I don't think it had anything to do with magic."

He furrowed his brow. "Are you sure? I thought it might make sense..."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because... after you fell, your skin was like ice. I could barley hold onto you. You were too cold. You felt more than dead."

Morgana had no response to this. The chill must have been a side affect of Kyulds' spell, but she couldn't yet reveal herself. "I-"

"Gaius thinks I imagined it but..." he shook his head. "I can't shake the feeling that something strange is going on."

"Oh?"

He waved her away. "It's nothing... probably nothing."

"I feel perfectly fine now," she said, a little too chipper.

"Right..." he responded, suspiciously. He shifted his weight and twisted the hem of his shirt. "You know you can trust me, Morgana. I- I want to help you in anyway I can and..." He hid his expression, but not before Morgana caught the slight quiver in his voice. "It's alright if you're afraid of it. That's completely understandable... I think, anyways..." He took a steadying breath and looked back up to her. "Just know that I'm here and I'm not afraid of you."

"Why would you be afraid?"

"Not that I would! N- not that I am! I'm just telling you so you can hear it." He scratched the back of his neck. "It's good to hear it," he said, more to himself than to Morgana. 

"Thank you, Merlin," she said, surprising herself with the genuine way with which she managed to say it. "To be honest, I am very afraid," she tried, attempting to act like she would have if Merlin had approached her all those years ago. She used to be afraid of herself. Almost every moment she was afraid. 

"You shouldn't!" His eyes were wide.

Morgana watched him curiously, wondering how far she could make him go. "Why shouldn't I be?"

"Because... because..." he was floundering. "It's just not something to be afraid of..."

"How would you know?"

"I- it-... you... I think Uther's wrong, that's all. About magic, I think it's nothing to be feared."

"Why do you think that?"

His lip quivered. "Because I... because I know... I just know what it..."

Was he going to tell her? What was the change that had led Merlin to that decision? Should she let it happen?

"Thank you, Merlin!" she said quickly, stopping his near confession. "I should accept your support, I don't need to know why."

"Oh..."

Why had she stopped him? "I'm sorry if I've been acting strange. I'm just trying to learn to live with myself. You needn't worry."

"Okay."

She smiled weakly. "I should go."

"Right, me too. Arthur probably needs me."  

"I'm sure." 

They parted awkwardly, Merlin shuffling back until he felt it right to turn away. Morgana thought she saw him wipe a tear from his face, but maybe she imagined it. This was not good, she thought. Things were changing. That was a conversation that had previously not existed. What was the cause of it? Would this change lead to anything more substantial? something disastrous for her and her sister?

She sighed looking out again over the city, frustrated that even though she had knowledge of the future, there were still so many things she didn't know. 

<<o>>

Morgana walked back to her chambers in silent but concentrated thought. It troubled her deeply that Merlin had acted in a way that was foreign to her. It was true, he had shown some concern and sympathy in the past, like when he helped her get in touch with the druids, but as far as Morgana remembered he had never come as close to telling her about his magic than he had only an hour ago. Again she asked herself the question, how much had she already affected the future by spending only a few days in the past? 

She sighed to herself. Hopefully, by stopping Merlin before he could tell her anything else, she had secured the proper course of events. She still worried though. The entire point of reliving her past was to be able to be one step ahead of Emrys at every turn, but now it seemed that might be an issue. She did not know Merlin's mind. Too many things were already changing. 

She paused before entering her chambers. If she had full control of her magic she could simply find a spell that would allow her to read his thoughts, or something to that effect, but with the fledgling state her abilities were in she would have to discover his mind the old fashioned way: spying. 

She made her way down through the citadel towards Gaius chambers. Before she got too close, she removed her shoes so as not to create any unwanted noise that would give her away. She crept silently towards the physicians door. It was slightly ajar, spilling flickering firelight into the dim hall. She crept close to the wall as to not be discovered. She could hear two voices inside that she recognized. It was Merlin and Gaius seemingly in the middle of some unknown disagreement. 

"Tell me you didn't tell her, Merlin! Please, tell me you didn't. It is a foolish thought!"

"No, I didn't. I came close, but I didn't." He sounded ashamed. 

"You seem disappointed, like you wanted her to discover your secret? Merlin, we've talked about this before. Telling Morgana will only bring you more trouble. It is foolish."

"I don't care about the kind of trouble I get in! She is struggling and she needs someone! I've tried to help her without revealing myself, but it just hasn't worked. She needs more than that. You should have seen the way she talked about what happened that night. At first, she was sure it had something to do with her magic. Then... she denied it completely."

"Morgana fainted due to a lack of sleep, Merlin. There was nothing magical about my diagnosis."

"Well, then you were wrong. I felt it Gaius, it was magic."

The old man sighed. "Have you spoken with Kilgharrah about this?"

"He always says the same thing."

"Which is?"

"That she can't be trusted."

"Have the dragon's words ever failed you before?"

Merlin didn't answer. 

"I think it wise to listen to him."

"If I listened to him when the witch finder was in Camelot, then you'd be dead! He told me there was nothing I could do for you."

"What you did to Erydian was extremely risky and reckless. Kilgharrah was right to caution you against it."

"Why do you always have to side with him!? He's wrong about this, and I know it. He would have me leave her in the dark to struggle alone, he would have me let Mordred die... His wisdom can only go so far. Morgana needs me or she needs someone to tell her she's not alone!"

"As I said before, it is too dangerous for you. What am I going to tell your mother if something happens to you?! Morgana will have to make do with me."

"Your not enough, Gaius!" 

A chilled silence filled the chamber. 

"Excuse me?" Gaius said quietly, hurt bubbling in his voice. "Am I not enough for you?"

"Growing up in Ealdor, there wasn't a day that passed where I wasn't disgusted with myself, scared of who I was. They were the loneliest days of my life. I know exactly how Morgana is feeling right now and I can't sit by and watch anymore, I just can't! I saw her the other night in Morgause's chambers. If I don't help her then she'll fall into the hands of someone like her. You know what Morgause tried to make Arthur do... and she almost succeeded. I can't let Morgana fall into that trap. I can't keep my secret from her anymore, it's just not right!"

"You must." 

"Why do you keep saying that?!!" he shouted. Morgana heard glass shatter.

"Calm yourself, Merlin, before you destroy anything else!"

"I'm going out."

"No, you're not." 

Morgana shuffled back into the darkness as she heard Merlin's footsteps approach the door. 

"Do not walk away from me, Merlin! You will clean this up at once!"

His footsteps stopped. "Gebétung!" She heard something shift in the room and assumed it was the shattered glass repairing itself.

"I did not say you could use magic!"

"I might as well! It's all I'm good for!" And with that, he stormed from the room. Morgana held her breath as he passed, but he was too lost in his own emotion to pay any attention to his surroundings. She followed, keeping a safe distance as he winded through corridor after corridor, ever descending down into the depths of the citadel. He grabbed an unlit torch from the wall. He waved his hand and flames instantly engulfed it, lighting his way down a particularly dark set of stairs. Morgana continued to follow, but froze when she heard Merlin shout. 

"Kilgharrah!" There was no answer to his yell. "I know you're there, but it doesn't matter anyway. I came to tell you that I'm going to help Morgana. I think you're wrong about her. You can't stop me!"

"Merlin..." came a weak voice. 

"Kilgharrah?" Merlin's voice sounded frantic now. "What's happened to you!?"

There was a violent splutter that shook the cavern. "Emrys..."

"Kilgharrah!" She heard Merlin's footsteps disappear down some sort of path. 

She felt it was safe to follow, peering through the small cavern opening. Her eyes widened as she caught sight of a great beast, a dragon much larger than Aithusa. It seemed to be panting and gasping for air. The small form of Merlin scrambled down a treacherous flight of stairs to meet him. 

"Kilgharrah! What's happened to you?!"

"What do you mean, 'what's happened to me?' I'm chained! You must release me at once!!"

"I know I promised to release you, but I didn't know you meant this soon!"

The beast paused and narrowed his golden eyes. "Have you done this?"

"Done what?"

"Chained me! Brought me back to this place!"

"What? No, it is Uther that keeps you here."

"Uther is dead!"

"What? No he's not."

"I don't know what type of game you're playing, young warlock..."

"There's nothing, I don't know what you're talking about!"

He reared his long neck high in the air. "Let me look at you." He brought his eyes close to Merlin's small form. "Impossible."

"What?"

"I'm not sure what to tell you."

"Kilgharrah..."

"Something has happened... I wasn't sure of the extent of it until now..."

"What has happened? I must admit, I have been feeling some sort of presence in the past week. Is this what you speak of?"

"It is possible..." the dragon said mysteriously. 

"Why did you think I chained you up? And what did you mean by 'brought me back'? Have you left?"

"I did, young Warlock."

"How did no one see you?"

"Oh, they saw me."

Merlin furrowed his brow in confusion. "Kilgarrah, it is not unusual for me to have trouble understanding you, but I have never been more utterly confused."

"Allow me some time to think. I do not think it wise for me to reveal all yet. But I can tell you this, something is threatening you. I can sense it. It stalks you like a shadow."

"There has been something..."

"If it reaches out, promise me you won't engage with it. You will leave matters be."

"What is there for me to engage with?"

"A powerful enemy."

"Is this about Morgana again?"

The dragon laughed. "That witch is the least of your worries."

"Don't call her that! She's my friend!"

He continued to chuckle. "I'm sure..." he quieted. "Now, leave me. There are matters I must... ponder."

"Very well." Merlin rose and began to ascend the stairs. Morgana sank again into the shadows as he approached the cavern entrance.

"Merlin?"

The boy turned. 

"I cannot stress this enough... do not engage with the thing that calls itself Kyulds."

"Kyulds?"

"Promise me."

"Uhh sure... I promise."

"Keep your word."

"I will," he said before slipping through the entrance and back up the dungeon stairs. 

Morgana was about to follow him when...

"Morgana Pendragon." She froze. The voice came from her mind, like the way she and Mordred could speak. "Show yourself to me." 

Against her better judgment, she stepped cautiously into the vast cavern. 

"So..." the dragon spoke with his physical voice. "You have decided to dabble in matters beyond your control, beyond your ability."

"I don't know-"

"Do not feign ignorance. I have lived for thousands of years, including those which you have erased."

"How-"

"It does not matter how," he growled.

"Well, what are you going to do about it?" she answered, matching his sinister tone.

"I will not have to do anything. You have already doomed yourself."

"You know nothing of-"

"Wrong again, high priestess, or, rather in this time you are merely a common witch. I know of many things, things you couldn't possibly understand. In resetting time you have changed nothing."

"I'll be the judge of that!"

"Silence!! You are the judge of nothing! Your destiny has been written since the dawn of time and so has Emrys'. Destiny will ensure your doom by his hand in one way or another... no... no... what you have done is far worse..." 

"If I cannot change the outcome, if I cannot change fate, then why was I brought back here in the first place?!"

"You were tricked by someone who can deal far more damage than you. You have been used. Believe me Morgana, that thing, Kyulds, is not your ally. He has come back for one purpose and one purpose alone."

"And that is?"

Kilgharrah sneered. "I am not your ally either, witch."

"Then I think I can make my own decisions about who and who not to trust."

"Then by all means, have at it!"

"I will!" She stormed away, the dragon's laugh continuing to echo behind her. He was trying to trick her! That, she was sure of. He was trying to mislead her away from those who would help her with her quest. Kyulds was on her side, why else would he choose to help her in such an astronomical way?

No, Kilgharrah was wrong! 

She had often searched for the Great Dragon in her travels, but had never succeeded in receiving his wisdom. Now, she was glad of it. His wisdom was nothing but opinion, his words nothing but speculation. She would trust who she wished, she would follow her instinct, and although she had at first been wary of the strange being, her instincts believed that Kyulds could be trusted, whatever he- it was. She hoped he would meet with her soon. She needed to speak with him to clear up any misconceptions that the dragon had shoved into her head.  

Chapter Text

It was another week before Morgana received a message from her sister. Too Morgana's delight, a small box on her window sill appeared one evening, housing a piece of parchment on which a message was inscribed. 

<>

Sister, 

Meet me tonight in the darkling wood at dawn. When the time comes, you will know how to find the place. I look forward to speaking with you.

- Morgause

<>

She rolled it up, relieved she would finally be able to confide in her most trusted confidant. Morgause would know what to do. She always did.

"Gwen!" she called. 

The maidservant appeared from behind a screen. 

She smiled at her. "I would like to retire earlier tonight. Could you prepare my bed?"

"Of course."

"Thank you." She returned to staring out the window. She would retire early so as to rise before the sun, although she didn't know how she would be able to sleep with the knowledge that she would soon be in the presence of her sister. She was rarely able to sleep with even minor anticipations and excitement. 

<<o>>

Indeed, Morgana had been right that she would get no sleep, but not for the reason she had expected. She had drifted peacefully off for a few hours until...

BANG!!! 

Shouts rang out from the courtyard below. The sounds of metal against stone and stone crashing against flesh. She shot up with a start. 

"Gwen!"

"I'm here, my Lady!" She entered the room nursing a dim candle.

"What on earth is going on down there? Are we being attacked?"

"There was some sort of magical creature ravaging the streets! Not to worry though, I believe the knights and Prince Arthur have already taken care of the situation."

Oh yes, Morgana remembered now. Arthur had boasted of how he had slain the beast which had killed many innocent citizens. She recalled being disturbed by the battle before. She sighed to herself. At least some things remained the same. 

Although the raging noises had quieted, she could not get anymore sleep. She stayed awake in bed until the first signs of dawn peeked through her window.

She was up, and slinking through the halls. Morgause was right, when the time came, she knew where to find her sister. She could feel her magic pulling her towards her. 

"Sister," she called into the lightening clearing. 

Morgause emerged, wearing her signature elegant red dress, bedazzled with gems and stones of the prettiest sort. "I'm here."

They embraced affectionately. 

"Morgause, I'm so pleased we are able to meet. So much has happened since we last spoke. There is much to discuss."

"Well then," Morgause gestured to a fallen log that they might sit upon. "Do tell me everything." 

"Like expected, nothing arose from what you told Arthur about his mother."

"Unfortunate. He looked murderous as he rode off."

"I'm sure Emrys was the one to talk him down. Oh, Morgause, I did my best to live everything the way I had done, but something happened that was new. I am unsure what to make of it..."

"Go on."

"Merlin approached me and began a conversation. He was concerned for my well being! He nearly revealed his magic to me. I had to stop him before he did so."

"That was wise."

Morgana nodded. "Who knows what his confession would change. I wouldn't be able to act as I did without suspicion."

"Anything else?"

"He had a fight with his guardian, Gaius, about it. I followed him as he stormed off, deep into the dungeons we went. It is there where Uther kept the Great Dragon, Kilgharrah."

"Pitiful," she said in reference to Uther.

"Merlin sought his council, but... Morgause, Kilgharrah knows what I have done."

"What, how? Did he inform the boy?"

"No, to my surprise, he didn't tell him. But he knew about everything... even about Kyulds. He told me any attempt to change my destiny would be in vain!"

"Dragons, however mighty, were often a dastardly breed, only caring for themselves."

"He did warn Merlin of Kyulds."

"But not of you?"

"No."

Morgause rose from the log and paced in front of her sister. "Good... good..."

"But what the Great Dragon said about destiny-"

"You would not be here if your destiny was set in stone!"

"Your right of course," she said, although she wasn't sure. 

"I have been thinking, Morgana, about the perfect way to enact our attack, or in your case, your revenge."

This perked her up. "I'm listening."

"Revenge, it is something best served when there is something to avenge. What I'm trying to say is that, killing Merlin now, before he's had the chance to hurt you, will not be as satisfying..."

"What are you saying."

"I think you should give the boy the same opportunity to poison you."

"Relive that betrayal?"

"It will feel twice as good when you finally exact your revenge. What is the use of killing the boy before he reveals his true nature towards you?"

Morgana thought for a moment, then smiled. Morgause was right. She could picture it now: Merlin standing over her, thinking he'd finished her off, but to his surprise... 

"I agree, I will wait."

"Remind me, sister, what was the poison he used?"

"Hemlock."

"Then I will enchant a concoction for you that will make you immune to this poison."

"When should I strike?"

"You need to be trained, Morgana. I suggest taking the same year absence from Camelot, to spend it with me. We can use this time to formulate a plan, to get a hold of your magic."

Morgana nodded in agreement. "But sister, promise me one thing."

"Anything."

"The knights of Medhir must ride as soon as possible. I will not wait much longer."

"It will be as you wish. I will prepare them at once."

"Thank you, sister."

Morgause knelt beside Morgana and held her face with her hands. "You are strong Morgana. Stronger than most I know of. That is how I know, together, we can build a world we both dream of."

"Thank you. You were always the one who made me feel powerful."

"I will send you another message when I am ready to light the Fires of Idirsholas."

"And I will be ready for it."

They smiled at each other and after a few more rushed words of goodbye, parted ways into the morning wood.

Morgana strolled happily through the brush, taking in the beauty of the dawn and the sounds of the forest waking to greet her. She smiled to herself. Things were falling into place. 

She stopped suddenly, hearing a strange sound that startled her. Was it an animal? No, it couldn't be. It was definitely a person. She crept closer, hoping not to startle whoever the stranger was. As she drew nearer she could clearly make out what the sound was. Someone was crying. Deep guttural sobs that ripped through their chest and came up in unpredictable bursts. She peered through the brush and gasped. It was Merlin. It was Merlin on his hands and knees, weeping into the ground covered in leaves. Even with all the hate that Morgana carried in her heart for this boy, it was painful to watch and before she could stop herself, she realized she was crying with him. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks as she watched, unsure of what to do.

After some time, his gasps and sobs quieted, but he stayed where he was, shaking in the foliage. 

"Merlin?"

He didn't look up. 

She drew closer. "Merlin?"

He still said nothing, but moved toward her, collapsing into her arms with a new wave of sobs and tears. 

"Merlin?" On instinct, she held him tighter, trying to lesson the quivering of his chest. "Merlin, what is it?"

She didn't remember Merlin being this upset about anything the first time she lived through these days. Maybe she just didn't notice.

"Merlin..."

"I couldn't save her..." he mumbled into the embrace. "I couldn't save her..."

"Who? Who couldn't you save?"

He didn't say, answering her question with more tears and strangled cries. She held him tighter still. 

What was she doing? She was comforting the enemy?! 

It was to throw him off the scent, she told herself. He needed to believe that she was his friend in order for their plan to work. But the longer she remained with him on the forest floor, she began to wonder if that's why she really stayed. I'm just curious about what could have possibly made Merlin feel this way! half of her mind screamed at her. He looks like Mordred, the other half said. He looks like Mordred after Kara was executed. It had been Morgana who comforted him then, and now...

"Who Merlin? What happened?"

"Why couldn't I save her? Why am I not good enough?"

"I don't know, Merlin. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Freya."

"Freya?"

Another sob escaped his lips at the repetition of the name. 

"Who's Freya?"

"Freya's... Freya's... she's gone."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too," he said, suddenly pulling away and realizing the situation. "Why- why are you in the woods?" he managed, still fighting to maintain an expression that didn't resemble anguish. 

"I was out for a walk. To clear my head. I heard you."

"Oh..." he wiped away the stray tears from his face. "You mustn't tell Arthur."

"I won't... but tell him what, exactly?"

"I don't know. That I was here?"

"I won't. As long as you do the same for me, don't tell anyone I was here."

"I wouldn't."

"Thank you."

Another suppressed sob escaped Merlin's lips. "I'm sorry!" he said, trying to tuck away his grief.

"There's no need to apologize. Just talk to me... who's Freya?"

Merlin only shook his head. "I can't... I can't do it..."

"You don't have to."

"Tell me, Morgana," he sniffled. "Have you ever felt like an outcast? Like people should be afraid of you?"

She thought for a moment. "Yes."

He shook his head. "It has to stop... it has to stop. The fear has to stop."

"I would agree."

Merlin wiped his face and stood shakily. "I have to go. I have to get back to Arthur. He'll be missing me by now."

Morgana stood too, but said nothing. 

"You'll be missed as well," he said, trying to sound chipper, although, the usual light behind his blue eyes was missing. His smiled, but it barley passed for a grimace before walking slowly off into the brush.

She followed, taking care to trail just behind and pretending not to notice how he still wiped away his flowing tears and took many ragged breaths. 

It wasn't long before they reached the lower town and the gates of the citadel. It was there that they parted ways. Morgana headed up the stairs to her empty chambers, while Merlin trailed off to his own.

She closed the door behind her as she entered her chambers. For some reason, the room looked foreign, a feeling she had felt when she first woke up in this time. But here it was again. After she returned from her trip, the room returned to its unfamiliar state. What had caused it?

It was simply foolish to think about, she told herself. She was obviously just not as well adjusted to the past as she had thought.  

Morgana removed her dress and slipped back into her nightgown. She suddenly felt overwhelmingly exhausted and decided she would get as much sleep as she could before Camelot descended into chaos once more. 

<<o>>

Merlin stared at the warm light emanating from the window in the physicians chambers. He sat slumped, listening as the citizens of Camelot began their day like any other, like nothing had happened. 

Gaius appeared in the doorway, just getting home from an eventful night. 

"Merlin, I was worried."

Merlin said nothing, continuing to stare at the yellow glow. 

Gaius sighed. "What became of the girl?" he knew what the answer to the question was, he had been present when Arthur informed his father of the news, but he wanted to hear it from his ward. 

"She's gone. She's dead." Gaius could tell the boy had been crying. 

"I'm sorry, Merlin." He embraced his ward.

"Why did you do it?" Merlin mumbled into Gaius' robe. "Why did you have to do it?"

"Do what, Merlin?" he asked gently.

He looked up, dried tear streaks prominent on his face. "You told Uther. You told Uther about her. Why didn't you trust me?"

"I told Uther about the beast, I told him what I suspected was attacking those people."

"Freya was not a beast!" The force of his shout forced Gaius back. 

"I'm sorry, Merlin. I had to tell the king. I had to protect the innocent citizens."

"Freya was innocent to! You could have helped her! She just had an ailment, that was all. She was no different than any other patient."

"No difference!?" Gaius was beginning to match Merlin's heat. "She killed innocent people!"

"She didn't mean it!"

"I have never heard a more foolish thing escape your mouth!"

"It could have been me! How am I any different!" Loose objects around the room began to shake, in tune with his anger. He gestured at the commotion. "Look! I lose control! I could hurt someone! Does that make me a monster?"

"Merlin, you're being ridiculous!"

"No! No! I think I'm finally seeing sense. First with Morgana, then with Freya..."

"What about Morgana?"

"You won't let me help her, you won't let me talk to her!"

"It will put you at risk!"

"I don't care! She needs help and I am not about to sit around and watch it happen! If there's a chance I can save someone, if I can help them,  why shouldn't I do it?"

"I can't lose you, Merlin! You're like a son to me!"

This quelled Merlin's emotion slightly. "You're not going to lose me, Gaius. I'm not going anywhere."

He put his hand on Merlin's shoulders. "That's not guaranteed. I have seen more than twenty years of Uther's cruelty. If he finds out about you... there won't be any mercy. Hiding that girl was dangerous. If you were found with her, you would have suffered a cruel fate."

Merlin stared into Gaius' eyes. "You told him more... didn't you..."

"Merlin-"

"You told him where she was-"

"No!" Gaius said firmly. "I told the king only of the danger. I told him nothing more. I would not do that to you." 

Merlin buried his face. "I'm sorry..."

"It's alright... it's alright, my boy." He wrapped his hands around his head. "And I'm sorry for so many other things too. You should do what you think is best. If you think Morgana needs it... then maybe you should be there for her. Maybe you know better than I."

Merlin looked up at him. "Do you really think so?"

"You can't save everyone, Merlin. But you should always try to save as many as you can."

"Morgana is on the edge of a dark path. I can sense it. I told you I saw her with Morgause-"

"You did. And I fear the same. But Merlin, I caution you against it. The less people that know, the better... the safer you will be. Please understand..."

"I know, Gaius. I know... and I'm still not sure about it myself."

"I trust you, Merlin. You are wise beyond your years. When you make a decision, I'm sure it will be the right one."

Chapter Text

The night had been like any other. Gwen extinguished the candles before wishing Morgana a pleasant night, there were no violent disturbances that shook the courtyard or lower town, all was quiet. Occasionally the wind blew past her window, moving her ornate curtains, but nothing more than these small sounds interrupted her peaceful chamber. 

She was just about to drift off into a comfortable sleep when she heard a voice from somewhere very close to her ear.

"Hello, Morgana," it said casually. 

She shrieked and rolled out of bed, frantically rummaging through her night stand, looking for something to light a candle or, worst case scenario, a weapon to defend herself with. 

"There will be no need for that, it is merely me."

Morgana looked over her shoulder, peering at her bed. She recognized the cadence of the voice, the certain relaxed inflection used at the end of a sentence, but the tone and pitch was completely different. 

"Kyulds?"

"Indeed, I am." Kyulds waved his hand and the candles surrounding her bed instantly lit. Morgana recoiled at the sight of the form sitting on her bed. It was the form of a young girl. She had dark hair, pale skin, and was wearing a dress that Morgana recognized. 

Kyulds met her questioning expression with his own confusion. "Why are you looking at me like that?" He looked down at himself. "Oh, I see. The last time we met I took a form that was more... comforting for you. I can change if you like."

"Who are you now?"

"I like to adapt to the environment I'm in. This person left a very significant mark on the world recently." His eyes were filled with unexplained woe. "When a person thinks about another person, associates them with some sort of intense emotion, whether is be love or hate, it is easier to hold onto that certain memory. I embody those people, alive or dead, who have left significant marks on peoples lives. For you, I chose young Mordred, as you had just felt that loss."

"But who are you now? I've never met a girl like that. That dress though..."

Kyulds laughed. "Who said I only embody people for you, Morgana? No, this one comes from someone else's thoughts."

Morgana felt a light pang in her heart. "From Merlin's?" She hated that, for even a moment, she felt sympathy for the boy. She made sure her demeanor hardened once more.

"Yes."

Morgana nodded in understanding. "So... what do I owe this surprise meeting? You could do with giving me some sort of warning next time. A note perhaps?"

Kyulds waved the girl's hand. "I couldn't be bothered. Either expect me at all times or be surprised when I show up."

"Why have you come?"

Kyulds frowned at Morgana's frankness. "I said that I would. I didn't know how long it would be before I regained my strength. But now, I am fully rested." He stared at the fingers attached to his hands, then looked up at Morgana with only his borrowed eyes. "To be perfectly honest, I thought I might not have to visit at all. I thought Merlin might be dead by now."

"Things have been... complicated."

"Oh?"

"You didn't tell me my magic would be compromised."

He shrugged. "I said the only thing that would remain intact would be your mind. Magic is something you'll have to remaster."

"But that takes time."

"Indeed."

"Which seems to be the only thing on my side. Time, I mean."

Kyulds smiled. "I'm sure." He got up from the bed and stood in front of one of the windows, letting moonlight spill onto the face of the girl he wore. "I take it you have a plan?"

"I do. I've met with my sister and-"

"Oh, Morgause... how delectable." 

"Right... well we've decided that, for now, it's best for things to be kept as close to the initial events as possible so that we can have accurate knowledge of what is to come."

"Oh, a brilliant thought, a brilliant thought. The only problem is... things have already changed so astronomically... I'm afraid it might be impossible to go back."

"What?"

"Oh yes. It's not your fault, really... well, I'm sure some of it is, but Morgana... every tiny action, no matter how small, effects things on a larger scale. Perhaps one day you combed through your hair five times instead of six. A mere minute and a seemingly insignificant and minute detail, but what that missing comb really is, is a unit of time. You left your room a minute earlier that day. You might have experienced the day completely differently because of that newly gained piece of time. If something that small can change what is to come, imagine what the mistakes you have made so far have affected the future."

Morgana was silent, digesting the news.

"You shouldn't feel too down about it though. You still have the upper hand. You still know things that others don't."

"How much has changed?"

"I do not know the extent."

"You must know."

"I promise you, I do not."

Morgana paced in front of her fireplace, much like her sister had on the night she told her about the very being standing in front of her. "What am I to do?"

"Exactly what you have been doing. You have a plan. A plan that ends with Merlin's death."

"Yes..."

Kyulds' eyes narrowed. "You do have a plan... yes?"

"We have the basis of one. Something to be built upon. Morgause thinks, and I quite agree, that my revenge will be more meaningful if there is actually something to avenge. At this point, Merlin hasn't done anything to me that would invoke such a feeling. Killing the innocent friend I once knew will not be satisfactory. We will recreate the circumstance, and he will poison me again."

"And then?"

"Then..."

"Then you will kill him."

"I'm not sure it will be enough. I want more. I want him to suffer as I suffered."

"NO! You will kill him as soon as you are able!"

"Why do you care so much about when Merlin dies? It will be done, just let me do it my way."

Kyulds slammed his fists down on the table in one swift motion. "It is not your business, witch, why I want things done!! You will do as I say!"

"Why does it matter so much, to you, that he dies? Has he wronged you like he wronged me?!"

His clenched fists shook the table. "He needs to be dead."

"If you want him gone, why don't you finish him off?"

"I... I can't..."

"Why?"

"It shouldn't matter to you why I can't. All that matters is what I'm telling you."

Morgana scoffed. "You're very demanding for someone who is asking for a favor."

"It. Is. No. Favor." Kyulds said coldly. His tone kept Morgana quiet for a moment. "Is there anything else of worth you wish to say?"

"I spoke with the Great Dragon."

"Oh, Kilgharrah..." He meandered back to the window, brushing his fingers against the silk curtains. "Do go on."

"He said I shouldn't trust you."

"To each his own, I suppose... but to be expected."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I wouldn't trust me, but that's just me. You may do as you wish as long as Merlin is dead. I do not care if I have your trust. It is of no consequence."

"You do not care if you have my trust?" Morgana was growing increasingly perplexed. 

"No. I know that you want your revenge. I know you want Emrys dead. I want the boy dead as well. I'm giving you the chance to get your revenge. Wanting the same thing does not make us allies. Associates, maybe, but not allies and certainly not friends."

"I gave no indication that I wanted to be your friend," Morgana said, offended.

"Yet, you seek to know my mind as a friend should."

"Believe me, it is only a sick curiosity. I do not care how you feel otherwise!" she snapped. 

"Then we have an agreement."

"There's something else that Kilgharrah said."

"Yes?"

"He said I cannot change destiny. He said, no matter what I do, I will not be able to get any type of revenge."

Kyulds snorted. "The reptile sounds wise, but he has been wrong about many things. He only means to scare you away from trying."

"You're certain?"

"Of course not. I'm not certain of anything. I have my suspicions, and usually, I'm right."

"I must admit, you're not filling me with great confidence."

"Then don't act with confidence. Act with instinct."

Morgana did not have a response to this. 

"Now, if you will excuse me, I am growing much too tired of this conversation. I will leave you to your... bed." Without another word, Kyulds vanished, seemingly becoming one with the breeze blown curtains. 

Slowly, Morgana's adrenaline diminished and she was able to get back into bed. However comfortable, her mind was still ravaged by thoughts of her situation. Who should she believe? The Great Dragon or Kyulds? both of whom seemed to enjoy being as cryptic as possible. Was destiny set in stone? or was it malleable and could it be changed? Could Merlin be killed? 

And then... how much else had she changed since she arrived here? She had thought that it would be an amount insignificant to her plight, but according to Kyulds...

Stop it!! she told herself. It was no use catastrophizing. She had the upper hand. How could things possibly play away from her favor?

<<o>>

Kyulds drifted through the castle, taking no form, no physical body. Simply a consciousness floating down the many halls, through the many doors, and into the physicians chambers. The old man was asleep and was not wakened by the slight breeze that Kyulds brought with him. He went up the small set of stairs and found the boy, sitting atop a few crates, staring pensively out the window at the night sky. His attention was stirred by the beings presence. 

"Gaius? Is that you?"

Kyulds smiled. "Not Gaius," he whispered, but in such a way that Merlin could not hear. 

Thinking it nothing, Merlin looked back to the window. 

Kyulds kept closer, reaching out with a misty hand and brushing the boy's shoulder. 

Again Merlin turned around. "Gaius?" He stood. "I know someone's there! Where are you?"

"It is only me."

"Wh- what?"

"You can hear me?" Kyulds asked, surprised. 

Merlin was looking wildly around his room, searching in vain for the source of the voice. "I'm warning you! If you don't show yourself... then... then..."

"Then what?" Kyulds whispered in Merlin's ear. The boy jumped at the proximity of the voice. 

"Bemeldian!" Merlin shouted at the room.

Kyulds felt a tug, the spell urging him to reveal his true form. He let curses fly under his breath as he fought against the glow in Merlin's eyes. With one final push, Kyulds forced the spell away. The rogue magic flew around the room, knocking into things and bringing chaos and disarray, the force of which hurled Merlin into the opposite wall. He fell unconscious as Kyulds' feet. 

"No!" Kyulds shouted. He quieted the unruly magic and went about tidying the room the best he could. He lifted Merlin from his place on the ground and set him gently on the bed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry... I didn't mean for things to escalate." Kyulds said in earnest. "Rest now, and forget all about this in the morning. It will be for the best." He hovered over the boy and grasped his hand in a way that seemed almost loving, strangely protective and endearing. "And I promise you, I will explain everything when the time is right, and the time will be right soon enough."

Kyulds drifted away again, out the door and past the sleeping physician, through the halls and up the stairs. 

"Kyulds..." came a rumbling voice from below. 

Oh here we go, Kyulds thought. He drifted in the direction of the voice, falling through layers of rock, brick, and hard cold stone. He reached the vast cavern with surprising speed. The dragon looked up as Kyulds entered.

"You snake!!"

"Who? Me?" Kyulds asked mockingly, acting as if he was offended. 

"You have no idea what you are doing!"

"I think I do. And based on your anger," he landed his consciousness on a solid rock and began to take solid form. When the mist cleared from around his physical shape, the form of Uther Pendragon appeared, crimson cape and all. "I believe you think I might succeed."

"Is everything a sick game to you?" Kilgharrah asked, in reference to the shape Kyulds chose. 

Kyulds looked down at the surly king he impersonated and smiled wickedly. "All and nothing is a game, Kilgharrah."

"You must leave, now. Take the witch with you and maybe things will resemble normality once again."

"But that's not what I want."

"What do you want?" the dragon growled. 

"You know what I want, Kilgharrah."  

"You will leave him be."

"I don't have to do anything you say, actually."

"Kyulds, please," Kilgharrah tone shifted completely, now imploring the strange shape shifter. "I'm sorry for what happened to you, I'm sorry for what you've become, but this is not the answer. Killing Merlin won't solve anything, it won't solve your situation."

"I don't think you understand!" Kyulds shouted in Uther's voice, which bounced intimidatingly off the stone walls. "I don't want there to be any situation anymore! I wish to be nothing!" He was near tears. "I wish to be liberated from my pitiful existence."

"You were created for a reason. Don't forget it."

"To be born of someone's anguish, is to not be born at all."

Kilgharrah narrowed his eyes. "You wish to be human? A mortal?"

"I wish to be dead."

Kilgharrah looked sadly at the being in front of him. "I am truly sorry for you, but there is nothing you can do."

"I can kill Merlin. Before..."

"I don't think you understand what you are-"

"Oh I do." His form flickered. "I do."

"Then what is your plan exactly? Killing Merlin didn't work for you the first time... why should it work now?"

"Because... because here, he is young. Here, he hasn't experienced the suffering, heartbreak, and betrayal he has in the present. He has none of the guttural emotions needed to create me. If Merlin was to die now... he would not fight... In fact, his dear love Freya has just passed on. He might even be glad to join her." 

Kilgharrah shook his head. "You are playing a dangerous game, trying to thwart destiny."

"I suppose, you will attempt to keep Emrys' destiny intact? You will try to guide Merlin along destiny's sickening way?"

He bowed his head. "It is my duty. My wisdom was gifted to me to ensure the beautiful and bloody path of legend and destiny."

"Indeed." Kyulds' form flickered again. "You told Merlin not to help Morgana. In doing so, you ensured her place as the darkness to his light, the hatred to his love. You planted the seed of doubt in his mind about the druid boy, Mordred, ultimately ensuring Arthur's death at the hands of the young knight. Every piece of advice, every spell you gave him, was to lead him to Camlann. Without your advice, things would have been different, they would have been better!"

"I was ensuring he succeeded in fulfilling his destiny."

"You never cared for him! You only cared for destiny!"

"And so... what then? You're going to make sure I don't succeed? You're going to stop destiny by killing him as a boy? It is absurd."

"What else am I supposed to do?!"

"Live with it!! Live with the guilt, the shame, the experience destiny has gifted you with! Do not scoff at destiny's plan, embrace it!"

Kyulds shook his head, trying to beat the dragon's words from his mind. "No... No! I don't have to!! There has to be another way!! There has to be a way I can free myself from this eternal nightmare!!!"

Kilgharrah merely laughed. "No one can choose their destiny, and no one can escape it."

"SHUT UP!!" The cavern began to rumbled with Kyulds' anger. 

Kilgharrah's eyes widened as fallen stalactites hurtled from the ceiling. One particularly sharp piece of stone impaled the dragon's leg. He roared in pain. Kyulds abandoned his physical form once more and began to drift away. 

"I will not have you in the way of the new destiny, Kilgharrah!!"

The cavern continued to shake uncontrollably. 

"It will take much more than a few stones to kill me!!" Kilgharrah bellowed.

"I don't have to kill you! I just have to make sure you can't interfere any further!"

Kilgharrah roared once more as falling stones and boulders blocked off the only entrance to his cave. He beat his wings wildly against his restraints to no avail. "Do not leave me you foul creature!!!"

"Only as foul as you, Kilgharrah!!"

Kyulds vanished into the stone, leaving the dragon in a pit of darkness. Kilgharrah roared and breathed fire with all his might, but he could not reach the young warlock sleeping above. He collapsed, exhausted and dirty with dust and pebbles caked into his scales. He panted in the dark, an unsettling cold setting in. He worried for destiny, but more than that, he was worried for his young friend who knew nothing of the debate that took place below the citadel. Kyulds had scoffed at the relationship between him and the boy. This truly hurt him, for although he never revealed the full truth to Merlin, over the years he had grown to care deeply for the boy, or from his time, the young man. 

And now his future was in jeopardy, a future that was known since the dawn of time, and there was nothing Kilgharrah could do about it. 

Chapter Text

"I'm a herder from the northern plains, sire. Three nights back we were camped beneath the walls of Idirsholas." The peasant held himself awkwardly in front of his king, clutching the hem of his shirt and staring at the ground. 

"Not sure I would have chosen such a place," Uther responded casually. 

"Good pasture is scarce at this time of year, sire-"

"And what is it you have to tell me?" Uther interrupted, bored by the day to day life of the simple man. 

"While we were there we saw smoke rising from the citadel."

Uther looked to Gaius who stepped forward. "And did you see anything else?" the physician asked. 

"No."

"Did you go inside?"

"No, nobody's stepped over that threshold for three hundred years. You must know the legend sire..."

"When the fires of Idirsholas burn the knights of Medhir will ride again," Gaius recited. 

Uther rose from his seat, a hint of worry in his eyes. "See to it this man is fed and has a bed for the night." The quivering man was led away. The king turned to his son. "Take a ride out there."

"Why?" Arthur seemed quite surprised with his father's orders. 

"So we can put peoples minds at rest."

"Surely this is superstitious nonsense..."

"Gather the guard and do as I say." The king retreated to a back chamber. 

Morgana strode confidently from the room, contrary to the men filing out beside her. They whispered nervously to one another, the old describing the legend to the younger members of the court. Many laughed at their worries, citing that it was merely a legend with no truth to it, but the elders ground their teeth and chewed their lips, knowing what might very well come. The fear in their eyes brought Morgana the utmost satisfaction. 

"Do you think there's any truth to it?" came the maidservants voice from behind her. "Do you think the legends are true? or do you think it's superstitious nonsense?"

Morgana put on a smile she hoped was reassuring and looked back to her. "I'm sure it's nothing to be worried about..." Gwen didn't look convinced. "And if there is, I'm sure we'll be safe. Arthur and the King will be there to protect us." Her insides nearly boiled with laughter at this statement. "Although," she added thoughtfully. "I'm sure if all goes to hell, you'll be spared. After all, you are a most loyal servant."

Gwen furrowed her brow. "What are you talking about?"

"Nothing." Morgana shrugged and continued to walk down the hall. "Just trying to make you feel better... feel safe."

"Well, thank you." They smiled at each other. 

<<o>>

To Morgana's delight, another message appeared on her windowsill that evening in an ornate box. 

<>

Dearest Morgana, 

Everything is almost in place. The last component I need is you. Meet me in the same spot tonight at midnight. I will wait for you.

- Morgause. 

<>

Morgana folded up the slip of paper and tucked it away into the pocket of her dress. It was finally time. 

<<o>>

The woods was silent as Morgana made her way to the clearing, following the glow of the full moon. It was somewhat unsettling as on the previous night Morgana had visited her sister, the forest had been alive with sound. It was almost as if the creatures of the woods knew what was about to occur and were expressing apprehension. 

"Sister," she called out with her mind. 

"I am here," Morgause responded, emerging from her hiding place amongst the brush. The pair embraced. 

"How good it is to see you."

"And I you." They smiled at each other affectionately. "Morgana, are you prepared?"

"I couldn't be more so."

"Then it is settled. I am sure you know of what we are to do. I am to cast the spell that will cause every occupant of Camelot to fall into a deep sleep. You shall carry this spell for me. You will be its anchor, its source, and a powerful source you will be."

Morgana nodded. "I will not fail." 

"Here," she said, pulling out a small vile from beneath her cloak. "Take this before Merlin poisons you. It will prevent the effects of the poison, although I'm afraid you will still feel the pain, it will not be fatal."

"How long will it last?"

"A few hours or so. Certainly take it after Arthur and Merlin find you. After they return from investigating the fire."

"Thank you."

"Of course."

Morgana took the potion and tucked it into her dress. She stared at her sister, unsure of the direction of their conversation. 

"Are you ready?" Morgause asked. "Are you ready for the spell?"

Morgana bit her lip.

"Is there something troubling you, Morgana?"

She nodded. "Yes... I had a visiter a night or two ago."

"Who?"

"It was Kyulds."

Morgause narrowed her eyes. "What did he have to say?"

"Nothing of real value. More of the same unintelligible mumblings. He disagrees with the Great Dragon. He thinks the future is malleable, that destiny can be changed."

"Well... if it were up to me, I would believe the being that seems to have control of time itself. What Kilgharrah says should mean nothing to you."

"I know... I know... it's just hard to trust Kyulds, and in turn, hard to believe him."

"Why do you find it hard to trust him?"

"He's hiding something."

Morgause raised an eyebrow. 

"I find it hard to trust something or someone when I don't know their motives. Kyulds will not reveal his motives to me. It's evident he wants the boy dead, but it is unclear why."

"Emrys must have many enemies-"

Morgana shook her head, a concentrated expression on her face. "No... no... there's something more. Something I'm missing."

"I have been doing as much investigating as I can, but no one I've ever talked to knows who Kyulds is. Whoever or whatever he is, he must be from the future, some time yet to come. Kilgharrah must only know of his existence because he remembers the future."

"What if he double crosses me? I just wish I knew who he was."

"We must focus on the task at hand. The here and now. Are you ready for the spell?"

"I am."

"I'll see you soon, sister," Morgause said as she raised her hand. Her eyes flashed gold and Morgana's world began to fade into the dark. She was vaguely conscious for a time and could hear the distant chants of her sister above. A strange tingling sensation engulfed her entire body and it lulled her back into the unconscious realm. 

<<o>>

Merlin watched as Arthur approached the shifting curtain, sword drawn. What could it be? What kind of magical creature could cause a sickness like this?  A sickness that portends a kingdom into deep sleep. Not to mention the less than convenient timing as he and Arthur had just witnessed a group of immortal soldiers take out a patrol of well armed and well trained men. Were these soldiers, or knights of Medhir, connected to this strange illness? They needed reinforcements, but Camelot seemed to have no conscious men or women to spare. 

The prince struck suddenly, pulling the curtain back in one swift motion. He grabbed the mysterious form, revealing the frightened young woman in the emerald green dress. She cried out.  

"It's me. It's me Morgana. What's happened?

"I didn't know it was you!" she responded. 

"Calm down Morgana," Arthur said, placing both hands on her shoulders. "Just tell me what happened."

"People were complaining saying they weren't feeling well."

"Then what?"

"They started falling asleep. Everyone, everywhere I went..."

"Was someone here?"

Morgana shook her head, tentatively. 

"Then why were you hiding?"

"I told you, I didn't know who you were."

Arthur seemed less than convinced, but decided to move onto another question. "Where's my father?"

"I don't know..."

"Arthur," Merlin tried. "She's distressed." 

"If you were awake then you must have seen something," Arthur continued to push. 

"I didn't see anything-"

"You saw people getting sick! What did you do?"

"What could I do?!"

"Morgana, I don't understand. Why is it that you're the only person awake?"

<<o>>

They were making their way swiftly down the hall. Morgana tensed as she felt Merlin's presence over her right shoulder.

"Don't worry I won't say anything."

"About what?" she asked, terrified for a moment he might know that she was from the future, that she knew his secret.

"The illness..."

"That has nothing to do with me," she lied. 

"No, of course not, but you have magic."

"You haven't told anyone that..."

"No, and I won't tell Arthur." He hesitated. "There must be something keeping you safe. I think that must be it." 

"Right." Morgana said. That must be it, she thought. That's how Merlin found out she had to be the cause of the illness. At first, he had thought it was her magic keeping her safe from the spell, but when he started to be affected...  

"I found him!" Arthur's shout came from a nearby chamber. Merlin and Morgana rushed into the next chamber to find Arthur hovering over the limp body of his father who had collapsed at his desk. "Father!"

"See," Merlin said, slightly exasperated. "He's alright."

"He is not alright!!"

"He's asleep! All we have to do is find the cure, a way to wake them."

"Who could have done this?" Arthur's eyes landed on Morgana. "You're the only one who's not been affected, Morgana, there must be a reason." 

Morgana sent a petrified glance in Merlin's direction, as she knew she had done her first chance to live this day. "I don't know."

"That's all you keep saying, but you must know something!"

"No, they just fell asleep one by one!"

"It's obvious..." Merlin tried, sending a meaningful look to Morgana. "When she started feeling sick. Gaius gave her a potion, right?"

"She was never sick, she never said that." 

"She was one of the last to be affected." Merlin gulped. "Somehow the potion must have helped." 

"What about everyone else?"

"By then Gaius was too ill. He didn't have chance to treat anyone else."

Arthur seemed to buy this explanation. "Go and see if you can find this potion."

Merlin sprinted out of the room, ready to follow Arthur's orders. 

"I'll search for signs of life in the lower town. Morgana you stay here and look after my father." Arthur approached and handed her a spare sword. "Here, you protect him with your life, you understand?"

Morgana nodded. Arthur moved with urgency out of the room, determined to save his father and his kingdom, leaving Morgana alone with the Uther. Instantly she dropped her terrified weak demeanor and replaced it with her cold stare. She watched the king sleeping peacefully across from her and observed the sharp sword she held in her hands. It would be too easy, too quick. Why hadn't she taken the chance the first time she was left alone with the king? She held herself back, knowing that if she was to get her satisfying revenge on Emrys, she would have to wait a little longer. She was so close... so close... 

From her pocket, she pulled the vile of elixir Morgause had prepared for her, the elixir that would reverse the effects of Merlin's poison. She uncorked it and downed it in one swallow.

<<o>>

Arthur and Merlin stood on the battlements, watching the galloping knights approaching in the distance. 

"According to the legend there were only seven knights of Medhir..." Merlin said, remembering his guardians words.

 Arthur asked the question that was at the forefront of both their minds. "Who's the extra rider?"

<<o>>

The trio struggled to carry Uther down the seemingly never-ending hall. His behind and cape dragged on the floor. Merlin seemed to be doing his best to subdue laughter.  

"It is not funny, Merlin," Arthur lectured. They burst through the doors of Arthur's bed chamber and discarded Uther roughly on the floor. "Did you find the potion Morgana took." 

"Umm... no."

"We can't leave him here we have to lift him onto the bed." 

"Why? He's asleep, he's not going to know-"

"Merlin!"

"Well... I'll get him a pillow."

"He's the king!" Arthur's stare could kill. 

"Alright," Merlin rushed to the bed. "Two pillows."

Once they propped Uther up with an appropriate amount of pillows fit for a king, they looked at each other, getting their bearings once more. Both Merlin and Arthur wiped sweat from their brows and took shaky breaths.

"You alright?" Merlin panted.

"You feeling the same?"

"We're getting sick..." Merlin held a hand to his forehead and Morgana could see the inner workings of his mind. He looked at Morgana, the first seeds of suspicion present in his mind. Before, Morgana had no idea how Merlin knew she was related to the illness. Now, it was quite clear. 

"We can't let that happen. We must keep my father hidden." 

"Why don't we disguise him?"

"That might just work."

"We could dress him as a woman!"

"That on the other hand..."

"We could dress him as a servant."

"That's better."

"I'll get him some cloths," Merlin said before running off again.

"Are you alright. Morgana? You seem quiet."

"I'm fine."

"You sure?" He drew his sword and placed it on the table beside them. "I can always tell when you're lying. Don't worry, I won't let any harm come to him."

<<o>> 

Merlin rushed through the halls. There was no time to loose. With Gaius out of the picture his only chance was to turn to Kilgharrah for help. He was worried about the dragon demanding to be free, Kilgharrah's tone conveyed he had nefarious intentions, but whatever he was planning it couldn't be worse than the present crisis. He grabbed a torch and headed down the set of long stairs. His tired breathing became even more ragged as he began to ingest bits of stone and dust that lingered in the air. He held his sleeve over his mouth and nose and held the torch out in front of him, illuminating the path ahead. He froze. The light revealed that there was no path ahead. Large jagged chunks of stone blocked the staircase.

"Kilgharrah?" he called out with his mind. There was no response. He directed his energy at the mass of boulders. "Rÿmet!" A shockwave rippled through the cave, but the rocks still didn't budge. "Asceadan!" Again, nothing. He didn't move, staring at the obstacle blocking his way. What was he to do? He counted on Kilgharrah, he needed the dragon's cryptic advice... Was he alright? what had caused the collapse? and most importantly, how was he supposed to clear Camelot of this spell?  He hurried back the way he's come. Merlin had already searched through his books, there was nothing that would wake them, he had tried everything he could possibly find or think of on Gaius. If he didn't find anything soon, he knew he and Arthur would be vulnerable to any attack staged by the knights of Medhir. 

And then there was Morgana... Morgana, who wasn't affected by the curse. At first, Merlin had thought it had something to do with her magic and was confident that he would be safe as well. Even if Arthur fell victim, he would be able to figure something out. But now it seemed... How was Morgana awake? Merlin felt the pit in his stomach deepen as his thoughts landed on the only possible explanation. Morgana was somehow involved.  

<<o>>

"Merlin! Where were you?!"

"I was-"

"It doesn't matter. Where are the clothes for my father?"

"I-"

"You don't have them?"

"I couldn't get to them! The knights have reached the citadel!"

"Dammit!" Arthur yelled, making his way over to peer out his chamber window. 

"We should stay here, barricade the door-"

"NO!" Morgana shrieked. Bother Arthur and Merlin stared at her curiously. 

"Why, Morgana?" Arthur asked. "I hate to admit it, but it's a sound suggestion."

"I-" Their altercation had occurred in the council chambers. They needed to end up in the council chambers. If they barricaded themselves in this chamber, she would never be alone with Merlin, he would never have the chance to poison her. "I mean, I think we should go to the council chambers... the windows are lower and maybe we could use them to escape. There's no way we'd survive a fall from this height." She gestured to the window. 

"Morgana's right," Arthur said. "If we barricade ourselves in this chamber there would be no method of escape. The council chambers is a better option."

"But how are we going to get down there with knights that can't be killed roaming the halls?! Let alone, dragging your father..."

"We'll just have to make do..." Arthur said, sounding unsure himself. An idea sprang to life in Arthur's eyes. He headed to his bed and ripped down the curtains decorating the banisters. "We'll put him on this so it's easier to move him."

Good, good, Morgana thought. They had dragged Uther like this the first time. With any luck, all would go to plan. 

"I'll go ahead, make sure the path is clear," Arthur declared boldly. "You two will be in charge of my father."

It was slow going, dragging a sleeping king down a long stone hallway. Morgana couldn't help but smile as she watched the hated king be knocked around in such a pathetic state. Arthur guided them with his voice, informing them which passages were safe to go down and which were infested with the immortal knights. 

Morgana waited. Waited for the moment she knew would come. The moment that would confirm all of Merlin's suspicions, but it never came. They reached the council chambers without coming into contact with any of the knights. There was no chance for Merlin to witness a knight choose to not strike her, no chance for him to decide to leave her behind. Panic began to flood her system as they finished dragging Uther through the large doors. Kyulds' words echoed in her mind. 

"A mere minute and a seemingly insignificant and minute detail is a unit of time. You might have experienced the day completely differently because of that newly gained piece of time."

He had been right. There must have been a few second gained or lost, something that affected when they would be dragging the king through the halls. What else would this new change bring? 

<<o>>

"Merlin, follow me!" Arthur said, retrieving the large piece of wood that could barricade the door. Once finished both Merlin and Arthur panted, trying to regain their strength. "Morgana we need the remedy that Gaius gave you. Morgana-"

"I don't have it!"

"I know that, but you must remember what it was. What was in it? Come on, Morgana, we can't keep going much longer, think!"

"I'm sorry I-"

"Doesn't matter," Merlin muttered. "We can't get it now anyway we're trapped."

"There has to be something we can do! Unless we can rid ourselves of this sickness then I don't see how we can hold out."

"We have to destroy the source of the magic," Merlin provided.

"Which is?"

"I don't know..." Merlin's voice trailed off, but Morgana could feel his eyes bearing into her. 

"Then our only chance is to get out of Camelot," Arthur said firmly. "Help me with my father," he said to Morgana. "You Cut the blanket up, we'll tie it to my father and lower him onto the cart."

"Arthur-"

"Morgana, please just do as I say! I'll fetch the cart round to the window."

"You're going out there?" A concerned Merlin followed Arthur to the door. "I'll come with you-"

"No, you stay and you protect my father."

"You won't reach the cart alone, it's suicide!"

"I have no choice."

"How you feeling?" Merlin asked, referring to the sweat pouring from the prince's brow.

"Not bad."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, you?"

"Never better."

"Couldn't get me a pillow could you?" He leaned against the wooden door with his eyes closed. 

"Don't mess around." He didn't respond. "Arthur, you need to stay awake!" Merlin slapped the prince's face, hard.

"Merlin!"

"That's better!"

"If you ever do that again," Arthur began to lecture.

"Well, don't fall asleep then!"

An ominous moaning echo seeped under the door. 

"Is that your knees again?"

Merlin shook his head. Together the lifted the wooden piece in front of the door. Arthur prepared to fight for his life.  

"If I need a servant in the next life!"

"Don't ask me!" Both laughed before Arthur slipped into the mayhem. Merlin replaced the wood and steadied himself against the door. 

"He's not going to survive out there," Morgana said, a little too maliciously then she had intended it to sound. 

"I-"

"We've got to do something!" She urged. Come on Merlin, she thought. Destroy the source of the magic. You know what it is. Betray your friend, save a kingdom that lives on lies and fear.   

"I know. Here you tear this up. I'll make some rope." He grabbed some of the fabric on the floor and began tearing. Morgana imitated. He turned and retrieved the skin of water resting on the floor. 

"Here, have some water before I finish it." 

Thank the gods, Everything had gone to plan! 

"Thank you," she replied, careful to engulf her voice in genuine gratitude, something she hoped would wrack the boy with even more guilt. However, he simply smiled at her and continued to rip up pieces of the fabric. No matter, she thought. The guilt would come later. She downed every last drop of liquid before placing the container on the ground. 

"Can you help me?" Merlin asked, wiping the continuous stream of tired sweat from his brow. "I don't know how long I can keep going and we need to get this up to the window."

Morgana blinked at him. What was going on? Why wasn't she feeling any affects of the poison? Sure, the potion Morgause gave her would protect her from the lethality, but why wasn't she feeling the effects? She remembered quite clearly: the dryness in her throat, the burning of her eyes, the struggle to breath. None of that came to her now. She felt perfectly ordinary. 

"Morgana?" Merlin asked. 

"Yes?"

"Is there something wrong?"

"I... no- I..."

"Please, I need your help."

"Right," Morgana rose to assist with the makeshift rope. Obviously the effects had just not set in yet. Any moment she would collapse in pain. She helped Merlin lower the long strand of fabric out the window. He brought a hand to his brow. 

"It's... it's not enough..." He sounded exhausted, barley able to get the words out. "It's not going to work. We won't be able to lower him." He looked defeated at the king and then back to Morgana. "What do we do?"

"I'm not sure..."

"When Arthur brings the cart, we won't be able to lower him down."

There was a bang on the door that made them both jump. Some of the knights were attempting to break down the door and based on the power Morgana knew her sister wielded, she knew at some point they would succeed. Her attention was suddenly drawn away from the door as she felt Merlin grab both her arms. 

"Morgana, you have to listen to me!"

This was it. He had tried to hold onto her as she died the last time. But she felt fine...

"Morgana, what did Morgause convince you to do?!"

She was stunned. "Wha... what?"

"You're the source of the spell. Aren't you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about!"

His grip on her shoulders tightened. "Listen to me Morgana, this is not the way! This is not the way to gain freedom!"

"Don't lecture me about what's right and wrong when Uther has children executed just for being born!"

"But fighting him with violence, with fire, won't destroy the pyre. It'll light it."

"What else could you possibly suggest?" she snapped.

"Uther's mind is set in stone, but Arthur's... Arthur can bring about an age we all dream of. He will unite the land of Albion and bring about an age of peace and prosperity. If you show Arthur, now, how magic could be used for good then he can one day bring about change. Showing him the evil and cruelty will only harden his heart."

"To little too late for that," Morgana muttered, squirming her way out of Merlin's tight grip. 

 He moved forward again, not letting her get too far. "Please, Morgana... I'm only saying this because I know what it's like... I know what it's like to hide and be afraid of who you were born as. I... I..."

Morgana's eyes widened as she prepared to hear his next words. Something had gone terribly wrong. The past that she had lived through was not intact. 

"I have magic too!"

Chapter Text

"I have magic too!"

No, no, no, no, no... This was not what he was supposed to do. "What?"

"I was born with it... I could move objects around with my mind before I could even talk. I couldn't control who I was, just like you! People in my village... they didn't like it. It's why I had to leave Ealdor, leave my mother... She sent me here so Gaius could help me control it. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Morgana... I should have told you a long time ago, but... I was afraid." His eyes were full of shame. 

"I-"

"Please, Morgana. This... th-" he clutched his head. "This is... 's not the way." His body could no longer strain against Morgause's powerful spell. His breaths were deep and ragged. "Morgana...? Stop this... I understand... but it's not the way... please tell her to stop this..."

"I'm afraid that won't be possible," she said coldly. 

He furrowed his brow in confusion, startled by her shift in tone. "Wh- what's going on? What do you mean? It's-"

"You should have done it, Emrys. You should have killed me when you had the chance."

His eyes widened further. 

"It was not meant to happen this way."

"What are you...?" he couldn't finish the sentence. He held onto the wall, attempting to steady himself to no avail. He slid down the stone, landing in a heap on the floor. Morgana knelt next to him, meeting his wide blue eyes. "Mor-"

"Shh..." She put a finger to her lips. "There's no point... is there... you've made things more difficult for me, Emrys."

"How..."

"How do I know? You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

The doors burst open and Arthur stumbled in, barely managing to close the heavy doors and lock them, before falling to the floor. 

"What have you two been doing?!?" he gasped. "The cart's ready and I've been calling!" His eyes fell on the near unconscious Merlin on the floor. "Wake him up!" he stumbled over.

"The rope we made is not long enough!" Morgana managed, slipping back into her helpless demeanor. Then he just fell, he's not getting up!"

"Merlin!" Arthur yelled in his face. The boy reached out and grabbed Arthur's shoulder with as much strength as he could muster.

"Arthur... she's... she... the source..."

"She? Yes, I know Morgause is behind this. I saw her." He clutched his head, struggling against his own feelings of exhaustion. "You have to get up!!"

This time there was no response from the boy. His arms dropped to his side and his eyes rolled into the back of his head. 

"Merlin!" Arthur shook him, slapped him even, but it was no use.

"There's no point!" Morgana said. "He's asleep! There's no waking him now."

"Dammit!" Rage and frustration bubbled in the prince's voice. He set Merlin down gently on the floor and stumbled to the window to examine the rope for himself. He cursed under his breath as he realized Morgana was right, the rope would never reach the cart safely. He looked wildly around the room, searching for any other method of escape. Bangs echoed from the other side of the door. He hit the wall with his fist, releasing his rage and frustration. "Morgana we have to-"

The doors burst open once more, collapsing under the strength of the seven knights. Flecks of dust and splinters flew through the room and midst the dust Morgause strode confidently into the chamber, the seven knights of Medhir standing menacingly behind her. Their expressionless stares carved trenches into whoever was unlucky enough to fall into their gaze. 

Arthur tensed and tried to muster a position ready for battle, but the spell already had a firm hold on him. His outstretched arm trembled under the weight of his own sword. 

"Mor- Morgana, get behind me!" he stuttered. 

Morgana didn't move. She locked eyes with her sister. "I've made a mistake," she communicated with her mind. "Emrys didn't poison me. Things changed too much." Morgause's eyes twitched slightly in surprise. 

"Morgana!" Arthur tried again.

This time she shrank back behind the prince, realizing it would be best to remain undetected as his adversary. 

Morgause smiled. "Prince Arthur, we meet again. I regret that it is under more... strenuous circumstances."

"The circumstance is just as strenuous, your intent just as malicious!"

"Oh, but you're wrong," she said, feigning offense. I simply allowed you to speak with your mother again. I had no control over what she told you."

"She fed me lies! My father would never hurt my mother, he would never turn to magic!!"

She smiled wickedly. "Whatever you choose to believe."

"I'm warning you, Morgause. Stay back!" He held the quivering sword aloft. 

She laughed at his vain attempts to defend Morgana, his servant, and his father. "How much longer do you really think you can hold out. A minute perhaps? Maybe two?"

"For as long as... it takes..." 

She approached him with mocking pity, but stopped when she reached the sleeping form of Merlin. She kelt down next to him. 

"Stay away from him!"

"I don't think you're in any position to make demands. I will do what I wish." She pulled Merlin's limp form up by his neckerchief, amused by his helplessness.

"Leave him alone!!" Arthur yelled. He flung himself with all his strength at the sorceress. She simply waved her hand, eyes ablaze, sending him careening back into the wall. He cried out in pain and fell to his hands and knees. Morgana shuffled backward as to avoid any collision. Morgause stalked toward the wounded prince, crouching down next to him and holding his chin up with her hands. She smiled as he struggled weakly. 

"There's no use, Arthur."

The princes eyes drifted close as his entire body became limp. Morgause let go of his chin, letting him fall to the ground next to Merlin. As soon as he was asleep, Morgana ran to her sister. 

"Something went wrong! I did something wrong! He didn't poison me! Things are changing! What am I supposed to do now?!"

"Calm down, Morgana! Panicking won't do us any good!"

"Why can't anything go right! Why, after everything, am I still failing time and time again!!??"

"MORGANA!!" 

The yell quieted her. 

"We should not see this as a failure. The greatest aspect of strength is the ability to adapt to changing circumstances. Our initial plan did not turn out as expected... it just means we have to try something new."

"But if he never poisons me, then..." Morgana didn't finish her sentence. In truth, she didn't know how she felt about taking her revenge on the Merlin of this time. This Merlin had been nothing but kind to her and had even revealed his secret with the intention of helping her. It was with this revelation that she realized how close the boy must have been to telling her the first time, how even the smallest of changes affected his decision. Torturing or even killing him wouldn't feel right, it wouldn't feel as sweet. In her wildest dreams, she imagined the pain and regret that would shine through his eyes in his final moments. But there was nothing for this Merlin to be sorry for, no grudge to settle, no vendetta to make even. She didn't say this, considering it a weak thought. Merlin was destined to be her doom. One way or another, he would give her a reason to hold a grudge. The logical thing to do would be to take care of him before he could give her a reason to hate him, rip the maple seed from the ground before it could sprout any roots. 

"Morgana?"

"Yes, sorry. I was just thinking."

"And?"

"We can't leave him here. He already knows I'm working with you. If I leave with you for a year, he will not buy that you kidnapped me. He might be able to convince Arthur."

"Since things have clearly departed from your original timeline, I think it best that you don't stay with me for the next year. Having no ally at court will leave too many things in the dark. We need to know what's going on inside the citadel."

Morgana nodded. "I agree. As much as it pains me to say it, I must remain here. But how can I grow my magical skill if you're not around to guide me?"

Morgause furrowed her brow. "Perhaps..." she turned her head and focused on the still form of king Uther, who was on the floor by the throne. "Perhaps, I won't need to leave you."

Morgana followed her gaze. "What do you mean?"

"Can we agree," she began. "That the death of king Uther would best be... delayed until we can work it in to a greater plan. A plan that will surely bring us long lasting victory."

"I suppose so..." Morgana said, uncertain. 

Morgause put a hand on her shoulder. "I know you wish to see him suffer, and you will, but killing him now, when we're in such a moment of uncertainty would be most unwise."

"You're right. Of course you're right," she said, reluctantly. 

"However, he cannot be left to rule to his own devices..." The enchantress removed a bedazzled   pendant from around her neck. Morgana watched as it swung gently from her finger tips.

"But if the king wasn't in his own mind..."

"Exactly right, Morgana."

"Sister, you would be able to remain undetected in his chambers. I will be able to seek your council whenever I wish."

"That you would."

"What about Merlin?" Both women stared at the sleeping form of the boy at their feet. "As I said, we can't leave him here, and we can't underestimate him. He may be able to break through any restrictive enchantment you place on him. There have been many times I've placed a powerful spell on the boy, only for him to break it through."

"Why don't you just kill him now?"

Morgana froze. Why shouldn't she just kill him now? "I don't know... I'd like to wait..."

"Wait for what?"

"I'm just... I'm just not ready. I want him to suffer as I suffered before he meets his end," she said, although she was unsure. 

"Keep in mind the danger. If this boy is destined to be your doom, then destiny will do anything it takes to ensure it. Killing him now would eliminate that threat entirely."

"I know... I know..." she bit her lip, trying to find the words. "But he just hasn't done anything!"

"What do you mean? You said he was the reason for all your suffering."

"He was... maybe. After Camlann, I wanted nothing more than to see him dead, but seeing him like this again... trying his hardest to be my friend and to help me, refusing to betray me when given the chance... it's just not the same. It wouldn't feel the same." She shuddered. "I don't know why, but it would feel like murdering a friend."

Morgause stared at her sister in disbelief. "I would tread carefully, sister. These feelings are most unwise."

"I know..."

She sighed reluctantly. "I will keep him until you are ready to exact your revenge. I will respect your wishes."

"I just need time."

"And I will give it to you."

Morgana let out a breath that she had been holding in for some time. "Thank you."

The armored enchantress turned her attention back to the necklace she held between her fingertips. She side eyed her sister. 

"Ealdordómlicnes geweald mín andsaca," she chanted. "Imete cynce heorte," she finished. The necklace glowed ruby red for a moment, before returning to its original emerald shade. "If this remains around Uther's neck, his mind will remain completely and utterly under my jurisdiction."

Morgana smirked and took the necklace from her sister. She walked over to her sleeping father and wrapped the pendant around his neck, taking care to tuck it under his shirt so it would not be seen. She stood and made her way back to her sister. 

"The perfect place for me to hide with the boy will be in Uther's chambers. No one will think to look in there. If any servants stumbled in, I'll capture their minds too, or kill them."

Morgana paused. "Do you think Arthur will suspect anything?"

"Not if I play my part well."

"I have faith in you, but he cares for Merlin. If he didn't show up after the attack... he would worry."

Morgause made her way to the center of the room. "Even if he does worry about the location of the boy, it's not as if he would ever be able to find him, ever think to look in his father's chambers. It does raise the question though... he might be confused when he wakes and the attack has been called off."

"I'll tell him that I took his sword and stabbed you when you weren't paying attention," she lifted the sword easily from Arthur's hand. "You had to retreat to heal your wounds."

"Will he believe that?"

"He'll believe anything."

"You'll be hailed as a hero."

"Indeed I will," she said, smiling wickedly and staring at her reflection in the blade.

"Néadhæs," Morgause whispered. One of the knights of Medhir sprang to life at her order. It stalked over to Merlin and scooped up his unconscious form. Morgause turned back to her sister. "Once we reach the king's chambers I will lift the enchantment and everyone will wake. You must be prepared to deliver your story. Is there anything else we are forgetting?"

Morgana shook her head. "I don't think so."

"Good." Morgause began to make her way to the double doors, followed by the knight carrying Merlin.

"Morgause," Morgana called out.

She turned. 

"I'll visit you tonight."

"I look forward to it." 

Chapter Text

The first sense to return to Arthur, was his hearing. There was a bustling of voices and noise above him as he drifted back into the realm of consciousness. He felt his arms and his legs, resting on a bed that was too uncomfortable to be his own. Finally, he opened his eyes and found a plain stone ceiling staring back at him. He investigated further. He was in a small room with a few cabinets and shelves. A window allowed evening light to spill onto his face. He recognized it. This was Merlin's room.

He swung his legs over the bed and winced as he felt a sharp pain dance up his spine and through his neck. He faintly remembered being thrown against a wall. All the noise and commotion that had drawn him from his deep sleep was muffled and coming from the next room. Cautiously, so as to not cause any more sharp pains in his back, he rose from the bed and made his way to the door. 

The voices and the din got louder as he approached. He opened the door to find Gaius' chambers alive and hectic. There were dozens of makeshift cots spread out all over the floor. Gaius and many servants hurried about, treating people left and right. Some had severe head injuries while others simply weren't conscious. 

"Gaius?" he called out. The old man turned and Arthur could see relief wash over his face.

"Arthur, thank goodness your awake. I wasn't sure... I couldn't treat you until you woke and I knew where the pain was." He made his way toward the prince, stepping over his patients. 

"Gaius, what's going on?"

"Well, when everyone fell asleep under the curse, some were in much less fortunate positions than others."

"Oh... I see," Arthur said, everything rushing back to him all at once. Morgause, the knights of Medhir, his father... "Is my father alright? What happened?"

"The king is safe and currently resting in his chambers. He has no physical injuries, but ordered he be left alone for the time being. I'll send a messenger to inform him that you are alright." 

"No need, Gaius. I'll simply see him myself."

"I don't think that's such a good idea, sire. He insisted he have no visitors. Even you."

"Why?"

"I'm not sure, but this experience has been taxing on all of us."

Arthur looked around at all the patients. "Gaius, I still don't understand. What actually happened? The last thing I remember was Morgause standing over me as I fell asleep. The knights of Medhir were with her and my father was completely vulnerable. What happened?"

Gaius gestured to the corner of his chambers. "You'll have to ask her for the full story." Arthur looked to where he gestured. On the rickety set of stairs that led up to Gaius' book shelf, sat Morgana with a blanket around her shoulders. Arthur made his way over to her. 

"Morgana?"

She looked up. "Oh, Arthur. You're awake. Thank goodness." She clutched her blanket tighter. 

"What happened after I fell asleep?"

"Well... after you fell asleep, there was nothing preventing Morgause from killing your father. Nothing, but me."

"You stopped her?" Arthur asked, shocked. 

She nodded. "I took your sword and stabbed her in the back."

"You managed to stab her?"

Again, she nodded. "She fled, probably to heal. The enchantment fled with her, as did the knights of Medhir."

Arthur blinked. "That's all it took?"

"I caught her off guard. She didn't see it coming."

Arthur nodded curtly, trying to hide his embarrassment. "Good job then."

"Thanks."

"Good, taking initiative. My father will be proud."

She smiled at him. "I'm sure he will."

"Arthur!" Gaius called from the other side of the room. "Let me see you so I can see the extent of your injuries."

Arthur obliged, making his way towards the physician. He sat down at Gaius' desk as he began to examine his back. After cleaning the wound he wrapped bandages around his upper back and chest.

"Sire, if you don't mind, I know it's been a hectic day, but where is Merlin?"  

"What do you mean, 'where is Merlin?'"

"I mean: where is he? I haven't seen him since he left with you on the patrol."

Arthur's blood ran cold. "He was with me and Morgana in the throne room. Gaius, where is he?"

"That's what I'm asking you, sire," he responded, worry growing in his voice. 

"You mean, you haven't seen him? He wasn't with us in the council chamber?!"

"No, it was just you, Morgana, and your father. Arthur-"

Arthur rose from his seat and made his way back over to Morgana. "Morgana,"

She looked up, evidently startled by his sudden reappearance. "Yes?"

"Where's Merlin?"

"What-"

"Where is he?"

"I- I don't know."

Arthur narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean you don't know?! He was with us in the council chamber. What did he do when he woke up?"

"He didn't-"

"He didn't wake up?!" Arthur was growing increasingly agitated. 

"I- I don't know, I didn't see him!"

"How could you not have seen him?"

"It was mayhem after everyone woke up," another voice jutted in from behind. Arthur turned to find the maidservant standing awkwardly behind him. "I'm sure he just slipped away and got lost in the chaos. Things still haven't quieted down. I'm sure he's around somewhere."

"Gwen," he said, wrapping her in a tight embrace. "It's good to see you!"

"I wasn't asleep for that long."

"I know."

"Also," she broke away from him and clasped her hands nervously. "I seem to remember falling asleep on the floor. However, when I woke up..."

"I couldn't just leave you one the floor."

"So it was you?"

"I didn't say that."

She chuckled. "Well, come on then. We can look for Merlin." The pair made their way towards the door.

"Hold on a moment," Gaius called after them. "Arthur, I haven't cleared you yet. I'd like to look at your injury again."

"I'll be fine Gaius. I'll come back once I've found the laziest servant in all of the five kingdoms."

<<o>>

"MERLIN!!" Arthur's bellowing voice echoed down the corridor. Servants and nobles alike turned to look at him, but he didn't care. "Where the hell is he?" Arthur muttered to no one in particular.

"I'm sure he's somewhere. There must be a reasonable explanation."

"Yes, you've said that before."

"Well, it's still true."

"No, no it isn't. He's not in the lower town, he's not in the citadel... he's not that fast, he couldn't have gone farther than that. Where the hell is he!?"

"I don't know, but maybe he just needed some time alone. Give him a day. There's no need to worry yet."

"And I would have thought that, yes. But whenever Merlin disappears, Gaius always has some convenient explanation that can't possibly be true."

"Okay-"

"If Merlin is missing and Gaius doesn't know where he is, then it means he's in trouble."

Gwen bit her lip. 

"You know I'm right."

Gwen nodded slowly. "I'm afraid to admit it, but I think I do. I'm just trying to be some sort of voice of reason."

"I need to speak with Morgana again. She must have seen something!"

<<o>>

Morgana slipped out of Gaius' chamber unnoticed. Her heels clicked along the stone floor following her hasty heart beat. She looked down and realized her hands were shaking. Stop it, she told herself. Everything is fine. But in truth, everything was not fine. The day had been a whirlwind, not just in events, but also in emotion. Morgana couldn't think straight. She didn't know how she felt about anything. Her heart and her head were no longer just filled with the pain and rage accumulated after the battle of Camlann. Time had forced her to be patient, to think before she acted, something that made her question what she really wanted.

"Morgana, there you are!" It was Arthur, followed closely by Gwen. 

"Here I am."

Gwen seemed concerned by her tone. "Morgana, is everything alright."

"Yes," she said, forcing a smile. "I'm just tired and would like to rest."

"Of course," Gwen agreed. "You've had quite the ordeal."

"Hang on," Arthur interrupted. "Morgana, you must know something about Merlin."

"About-"

"I've searched everywhere. There's no sign of him. Something must have happened during the attack, after I fell asleep. What did you see?!"

"I... I saw nothing... I'm sorry I don't remember!"

"Think, Morgana!"

"I'm sorry!"

"Arthur, drop it for now," Gwen urged. "Maybe she'll remember better in the morning after a good night's rest."

Morgana thought back to Morgause's plan - no, their plan. They didn't count on Arthur being so adamant so quickly about the boy. But of course, even though he wouldn't admit it, Arthur would do anything for Merlin. She needed an explanation. An explanation that would keep Arthur occupied and looking in the wrong direction. 

"I... I did see something..." she suddenly had Arthur and Gwen's undivided attention. "When Morgause fled Camelot... I think she took Merlin with her." 

Arthur's eyes widened. "She what?"

"There was nothing I could do. She took him."

"Why would Morgause take Merlin?" 

"I..." Again Morgana had to reach for an explanation. "Maybe she saw how much you wanted to protect him. Before you fell asleep you were quite adamant about protecting him. Maybe she knew it would get to you. And it... Arthur?"

The prince was already off down the hall, running with his crimson cape billowing behind him. 

<<o>>

It was dark. It was cramped. Was he even awake? Was he still asleep?

He felt something restricting his wrists and his ankles. He tried to speak, but all that came out was a muffled whimper. A tight gag restricted his mouth and jaw, making it impossible to keep his head and neck in a comfortable position. Merlin tried to shift his body, but found himself trapped by impossibly close walls. 

He heard a shuffle from somewhere outside the walls. His breathing quickened as footsteps approached him. Again he tried to speak, but all that escaped were incoherent noises. He heard the footsteps stop beside his walls. 

"Emrys," it said, and Merlin recognized Morgause's voice. "There's no point struggling and if you try to use magic it will be most unpleasant for you," she snarled. "Don't forget that Camelot is full of your innocent loved ones, who's lives could be snuffed out as easily as a candle." He footsteps retreated back to where they'd come from. He thought he heard her sit down.

Merlin, once again, peered around at his surroundings. He now noticed a thin line of light next to him where Morgause's voice had come from. Maybe the door to his unfamiliar prison? He whimpered as he shifted his head in the direction of the light, attempting to look out. Through the thin line he could barely make out Morgause sitting at a long table. Thoughts flooded his mind at the sight of the sorcerer. Where was she keeping him? Why was she keeping him? How did she know to call him Emrys? Even more troubling, how did Morgana know to call him Emrys? How was his friend involved in all this? Had he failed her? 

"Mmm... mmmm," he tried to speak, but was restricted by the tightly tied cloth in his mouth. His protests got no response from Morgause who continued to sit complacently at the long table. Merlin searched Morgause's surrounding area, trying to get his bearings. He was shocked to realize that he recognized something. It was furnished exactly like many of the rooms in Camelot's citadel. With his limited vision, he could see familiar red and gold tapestries decorating the walls.

He flinched as a loud and frantic knock came from the door to the room. Morgause stood abruptly. 

"My Lord, it's me, Morgana. May I enter?"

Morgause opened the door and let her sister enter. The king's ward seemed agitated as she walked briskly into the room, wasting no time with pleasantries with her sister. 

"Morgana, how are you?"

"I'm fine."

"You seem... distressed."

"It's nothing." Merlin could tell by her tone it was not 'nothing'.  "It's just stressful... keeping up the pretense." She glanced quickly in Merlin's direction. "Is he... is he in there?"

"Yes."

She took a deep breath. "And he hasn't given you any trouble?"

"He only just woke."

"He's... awake?" She sounded alarmed. 

Morgause nodded. 

Morgana forced her attention away from Merlin abruptly. "And Uther?"

"He sleeps soundly." She gestured to a place Merlin couldn't see. "My enchantment is working well. He does as I command."

"Good... good..." Morgana's eyes flitted back in the direction of Merlin. 

"You seem nervous about the condition of Emrys."

"No... no- I-"

"Would it ease your mind if you saw him?"

She gave no answer, but Morgause made her way in the direction of Merlin. He shifted back away from the crack, but hit his head on the hard wall of wherever he was being held. The doors swung open suddenly. Merlin was blinded by the light that flooded his vision. He closed his eyes, unable to shield them with his restrained arms. He felt Morgause roughly grab him by the arms and force him out onto the floor. He looked around wildly, confirming his location. He recognized this room, he was in the king's chambers and was just forced out of Uther's wardrobe. The king was asleep on his ornate bed, but peculiarly slept over the blanket and in his cloths. What was going on? 

The enchantress grabbed his chin and forced him to look up. He met Morgana's gaze and tried to ask her his many questions with his eyes, but she looked away as soon as he made contact. His attempts to speak and cry out for help came out as undistinguished whimpers and moans.

"No, I don't want to see him."

"But, why?" Morgause asked, slightly amused. "It should bring you satisfaction to see him like this, completely at your mercy-"

"I know... it... it does..." she stuttered. 

"But, sister, I'm not convinced that that's true."

Morgana didn't answer. 

"It's alright... is this about those foolish feelings again."

"Yes."

"You know my stance." She released her tight grip on the boy. "You know my stance on these feelings. I said I would give you a few days to feel them, and then you must harden your mind and do what must be done."

"A few days? That's not what you said!" Morgana said alarmed. "You said you would give me time, as long as I needed."

"The longer this boy is alive the more danger you are in in! I'm trying to keep you safe."

"I know, I know... I'm sorry..."

"Then promise me," Morgause started with conviction. "Promise me that in no more than a fortnight," she gave Merlin a swift kick to the abdomen that caused him to gag and splutter. "He will be dead." 

Morgana stood her ground. "Morgause, I can't promise that, I can't. You're not the one who has lived through all this already, that would be me! So, why are you acting like you know what's best!?"

"I am simply using the information you have provided me with," she responded, calmly. 

Morgana took this in and buried her face in her hands. "I know, I... I'm sorry. You are only trying to help."

Morgause put a hand on her sister's shoulder. "I want what is best for you."

"I know, I know..." She wrapped her arms around Morgause. "And you're right... I know you're right." She broke away and fixed her expression to something stony. "Within a fortnight. Within a fortnight I will finish it."

Merlin looked up at her terrified by what he was hearing. She refused to make eye contact, instead walking away towards the table. Morgause grabbed Merlin by his scarf and dragged him back to the wardrobe. Merlin struggled kicking his bound legs and arms, trying to squirm away from her grip. Morgause slapped him across the cheek, regaining his attention. He could have sworn he saw Morgana wince out of the corner of his eye. 

"Remember what happens if you give me any trouble. Struggle like this again and it will be that maidservant's blood on your hands, what's her name? Gwen? Continue to struggle and it will be Gaius who is found dead. I don't think you need me to go farther."

Merlin gave up, letting the enchantress drag him roughly back into the wardrobe and making no objections when she slammed the door. However, he continued to listen to their muffled conversation. 

"Now," Morgause sighed, walking back to her sister. "Your magic..."

Morgana perked up at the mention of her magic. "I was hoping you'd mention that. I want to start practicing as soon as possible. It's not that I don't have the words. I remember every word of the old religion I ever studied, but for some reason when I speak the words nothing happens for me. The only way I have used magic since I arrived here was accidental."

"I think part of your problem might be that you're starting too big. You're starting with spells that might be too advanced. Start with simple ones, ones that you learned in your first lessons."

"I'm just concerned about the time and I've already tried simpler spells... every day without a firm hold of my magic is another day in increasing danger."

Morgause sighed. "Your impatience and your ambition will be your undoing, sister. It is possible that you had an easier time learning and practicing the simple spells your first time because you had no expectations for how far you would advance. You expect too much of yourself." 

"I have to."

"Again you forget... you're not alone, Morgana. Not anymore. And this time you never will be. I will never be taken from you, I will never leave you, I promise." She sounded resolute. 

"How can you be so sure? Things are different now. I've changed things."

"Exactly. You've changed things for the better. I know you have."

"Thank you." She sounded to Merlin like she was near tears. "I don't know how I survived those years without you. They were spent in darkness." Her voice broke. 

The sisters embraced for a long moment, Morgause comforting her tearful sister. Finally, they broke apart. 

"You should return to your chambers," Morgause whispered. "We don't want to raise suspicion." Morgana nodded and rose from her seat, not yet breaking the distance between her and her sister's clasped hands. "Will it be safe for me to return tomorrow night? Seeing you is the only thing I have to look forward to, the only thing that keeps me sane."

"You should come as often as you wish, as long as you remain undetected."

"I will. Who would suspect the king's ward." Her eyes passed over Merlin's prison. "Well, besides the prince's serving boy."

"But in a fortnight..."

"He will... he will be gone." Morgana seemed to be the opposite of her sister. She was undecided and unsure. 

After Morgana slipped through the heavy door, Morgause returned to the wardrobe and dragged Merlin out once more. She secured his arms and legs to one of the chairs at the table and removed his gag. 

"What have you done to Morgana?! What have you done to the king?!" he blurted out. His outburst earned him a swift punch to the face. 

"You are in no position to ask questions. You will simply answer mine, is that understood."

Merlin said nothing, simply staring down the enchantress with a hateful gaze.

She smirked. "Good." She walked away, extinguishing the candles around the outside of the room, leaving only the few on the table, creating a dismal and unfamiliar atmosphere. "So, Emrys-"

"My name is Merlin."

"I know you have many names."

"I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Oh, of course you do. There is no question of that."

"Where's Arthur?! What have you done to him?!"

Morgause laughed. "You needn't worry for Arthur's sake. You will be dead long before he even realizes anything is amiss." She eyed him wickedly. "And don't think I can't kill you. I know what you are, and I know what can kill you."

"I don't know what you're talking about." And this time, Merlin truly didn't.

"There are few things powerful enough to kill a high priestess of the old religion, even fewer things that can kill the Emrys from legend, a being who is magic itself."

Merlin's eyes grew wide.

"You didn't know? No one's told you?" She laughed. "Where I come from, where I studied, we read all about you, read through all the prophecies. The elders even kept a keen eye in case one of their pupils turned out to be Emrys himself."

"Just the druids call me Emrys."

"Oh there were many more." Her eyes shifted to the slumbering king on the bed. "Unfortunately, they were snuffed out." 

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because I'm tired, Emrys. I haven't even been alive that long and already I am tired of the way things are. There needs to be change."

"A- And there will be. Arthur is the once and future king who-"

She slapped him again across the face. "Oh, I know what legend states!! But it is cruel and ridiculous!! Letting one Pendragon rein terror while hailing another like a hero!"

"Family doesn't dictate everything!"

"You're right, but it dictates something. Why should I believe that Arthur will be any different? He's been raised by a monster."

"I-"

"And fate, it seems, agrees with me. After everything, fate has changed its mind."

"What do you mean?"

"You asked me what I had done to Morgana? Well, I have done nothing. Everything she has done she has done herself."

"What?"

"The Morgana you see today, has memories from a time yet to come."

Merlin simply stared. 

"It sounds impossible, but alas... she has proven herself, hasn't she?"

"You're lying."

"I have no reason to lie to you. It is the truth, believe it, or don't, I do not care. You'll be dead before it could possibly pertain to you." She got up from the table and paced just beyond where the light of the candles reached. "But I need your help with that."

"You need my help ensuring my death? Why would I help you?"

"As I already stated," she said, slightly frustrated. "Tomorrow morning Gwen and Gaius will either wake up, or they will not. You are the one to control that."

Merlin fixed her with an icy stare. "But if I kill you now, you won't have a chance to lay a finger on anyone in this citadel. Not Gwen... not Gaius..." 

"Oh, but you won't be able to kill me. Those restraints will only tighten if magic is used against them. You don't think I'm that stupid, do you?" She seemed satisfied with Merlin's silence. "So, as I said..." She walked back into the light, hovering just above Merlin's face. "You, are going to help me ensure your own doom."

Chapter Text

Merlin was terrified. More terrified than he had ever been. There was more adrenaline coursing through his veins now then when he had dueled Nimue or even when he was fighting for his life against the petrifying knights of Medhir. He tried not to show his fear, but based on Morgause's satisfied expression, he wasn't doing a perfect job. 

"Have you never thought about death before, Emrys?"

"Of course I've thought about death. I've been close to it more times than I can count."

She smiled wryly. "I think you have been more distant from death than you realize." She got up from the table and began to pace once more, just outside the candle light. Her voice seemed to echo around Merlin. He gave up trying to keep track of where she was. "Do you know what your name means?"

"A Merlin is a bird," he said, even though he knew what Morgause was really after. 

"Yes, very amusing. I was referring to your druid name."

"No."

"Emrys means... immortal."

Merlin froze. The adrenaline in his blood stood still. He felt like he was watching the world from a distance, like these events were only his own reflection in a mirror and even then, the mirror stood across a vast chamber. After a long pause, he found the strength to speak. "You can't possibly... I can't... but I've been so close... I've almost been killed countless times-"

"All destiny's illusion. A good one too."

"No, when Nimue poisoned me, I would have died if Arthur hadn't brought me the antidote! I was so close to death then, and that's only one example."

"Oh, yes, Morgana told me all about that, and I've had nothing but time to speculate." She met his eyes. "I think you did die Emrys. You did die that day. Of course this is just my own thoughts, but I don't think Arthur was in time. He would have been, if his father hadn't been such an arrogant fool."

Merlin shook his head. "No, Arthur was in time. That's how I'm still here."

"Your little maidservant friend, Gwen, told my sister all about how things transpired. You stopped breathing, your heart stopped. An antidote can't cure a poison victim if the poison has already done its dirty deed." She emerged from the shadows. "In my years training to be a high priestess, I learned enough about you, Emrys, to know that it wasn't the antidote that cured you that day."

Merlin couldn't find his words. 

"Of course, it makes for a better narrative if Arthur, the brave and conceited prince, commits a selfless act to save his defenseless servant."

"Why are you telling me all this?!"

"Because, Emrys, you are destined to be my sister's end. I cannot let that happen. If you were to be kept alive, even in chains, destiny would find away to carry out its cruel work." She shook her head. "If Morgana is to be safe, you must be dead and in the past few weeks I have discovered just how to do it." 

Merlin shifted in the chair, trying to distance himself as much as possible from the enchantress. "I don't understand-"

"A blade forged in a dragon's breath should do it, as long as a powerful enough spell is cast when using it. You must be weakened first. The only problem is..." She stopped her pacing to stare directly at Merlin. "There hasn't been a blade like this made in thousands of years, the last ones being lost to time."

Merlin looked away, trying to conceal the recognition in his eye at the mention of such a blade. His mind raced, thinking of the one he made for Arthur that now rested in the depths of Avalon. 

"And how convenient too. As a dragonlord, I'm sure you could manage to forge such a weapon."

Merlin furrowed his brow. "A what?"

"A dragonlord."

"I... no... I don't know what that is, I think you've got it wrong-"

"Don't play games with me, Emrys! Morgana told me everything. Emrys is a dragonlord."

"How can that be?! I don't even know what that is!"

She narrowed her eyes. "Remember who's lives you're bargaining, warlock."

"I swear to you on Gaius' life, I know nothing about dragonlords. I've never even heard that word before!"

She turned away, deep in thought. "Interesting... interesting..." She suddenly turned back. "Where would I find your parents, boy?"

Merlin began to panic. "No, please I-"

"Answer the question!"

"Please, don't hurt my mother!"

"No... no... it wouldn't be your mother. What about your father, where is he?"

"I've never met my father. He died before I was born."

"Died... or left?"

"I- he- I don't know..."

"Where would I find him?"

"I don't know!!"

"Who would know?"

"How many times do I have to say it?!"

Morgause pinched the bridge of her nose. 

"Do you still need my help?" Merlin asked sarcastically. 

Both jumped at the sudden knock that pounded on the door. Merlin took a deep breath, ready to cry out for help, but Morgause was quicker. She shoved the gag back into his mouth causing him to cough and splutter. 

"You will not say a word!" she hissed.

<<o>>

Arthur paced outside his father's chambers, debating whether or not he should disturb him. It was late. Very late. The servants and the nobles had already retired to their respective chambers, but Arthur couldn't sleep, not after his ordeal, not when he knew Merlin was out there somewhere, battered or dead. Not only that, but he hadn't seen his father since the attack. No matter what Gaius said, he was sure his father would want to speak with him. The flickering candle light that filtered under the door indicated that the king was still awake. 

He knocked on the door. "Father? It's Arthur. May I come in?"

There was a shuffling from inside, then silence. 

"Father? I know you're there. I... I need to speak with you."

Heavy footsteps approached the other side of the door.  It swung open, revealing Uther's pale form. He was still dressed in his day attire, chainmail adorning his chest and a crimson cape billowing behind him. 

"Are you not... tired? Shouldn't you be resting...?" Arthur asked him. 

Uther looked down at his appearance, then back to his son. "I... I couldn't... I mean, I was."

"Right..." Arthur said, slightly concerned. His father was rarely a man of few words. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Yes, I'm perfectly fine. What is it you wished to discuss with me?" 

Arthur tried to indicate that he wanted to come inside, but his father didn't budge, standing stiffly to block the door. "Father, may I come in?"

"I'm afraid not. I was going to retire soon."

"Father, are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, of course. I'm just... I'm shocked that something like this could happen in Camelot." It was the first time that Uther made eye contact with his son, as if he was trying to tell him something. But his gesture went unnoticed, or at least misunderstood.  

Arthur didn't notice his father's desperation, writing it off as shock in relation to the events that transpired earlier that day. "I just wanted to let you know that I'm going to go out on a patrol tomorrow. I want to look for Morgause's trail, if she left one. She... I'm afraid to inform you... Morgause took a hostage and I intend to rescue them."

"Who did she take?"

"My servant, Merlin. Morgana said she saw Morgause-"

"Your going to waste your time on a patrol looking for a mere servant?"

"I... I know you disapprove, but-"

Uther winced in pain. "I mean... of course... you must do whatever you can..." he stuttered. 

Arthur furrowed his brow in confusion. He had expected his father to react as he had initially. Arthur had grown used to his disregard for servants. "You think I should go and look for Merlin? I was going to ride to the border and-"

"Yes. I think that's a good idea. Take as much time as you need," he said quickly. 

"What do you think-"

"I'm sorry, Arthur, but I really must retire for the night."

"Of course, my apologies... goodnight father."

"Goodnight... son," the king said, before closing the door abruptly in Arthur's face. 

Arthur stood there, dumbfounded, for a moment before slowly making his way back to his own chambers. 

It was a traumatic day, he told himself. That was all that was causing his father's strange behavior. In a few days things would be back to normal. However, he couldn't shake the feeling that something more was going on. It's foolish, he though. There were more important things to worry about. 

He needed to find Merlin. Arthur knew his servant would do the same for him.

<<o>>

Uther doubled over in pain upon shutting the door. 

Morgause emerged smugly from behind a curtain. "If you didn't fight me, it would be less painful for you."

Uther sent her a hateful glare. "You are despicable!" he spat. "What is it you think you're going to achieve?!"

Morgause pursed her lips as she approached the king. "Revenge, satisfaction... a multitude of things." She reached Uther who's entire body shook with rage. "On your knees," she commanded. 

Uther gritted his teeth, but obeyed, spurred on by the enchantment secured around his neck.

"Now... go to the bed and remain there until I say otherwise." 

And Uther did so, cursing and grunting the entire way, attempting to resist. He made himself as comfortable as he could, but his body was stiff and nervous sweat poured from his brow. He watched as Morgause secured the door of the wardrobe, locking Arthur's servant inside. He heard her mutter a few spells under her breath before retrieving her cloak and throwing it around her shoulders. She glanced in Uther's direction and gave him a stern eye before slumping into a fluffed arm chair in front of the bare hearth. She lit the fire with a wave of her hand and extinguished all other sources of light in the room. She seemed to be settling in for the night, a strange sight as Uther had assumed the witch never slept. Even so, Uther did not dare shift his position or make a single noise for at least two hours after she settled in, in fear of retaliation. 

However, he knew he needed to take action to save his kingdom in anyway he could. If he sat idle at Morgause's beck and call then he was giving up. He could not let this enchantment, this magic, poison his body. He peered around the room, searching for any method of escape. Morgause's enchantment kept him, for the moment, bound to his bed, but he could still think for himself even if he couldn't always control his actions. 

His eyes landed on the wardrobe. At first, he had been utterly confused as to why Morgause would go through much trouble keep such an insignificant servant alive. After listening to their conversation, however, he realized the boy had been deceiving the kingdom for quite some time. But what confused Uther further, was the total hostility Morgause and the boy seemed to have for each other. They were both magic users. Why would they not be working together to take down the kingdom? Surely two of them would be stronger as one, especially after listening to Morgause speak of how powerful the boy was. 

In this instance, he decided, it didn't matter. Escaping Morgause, who was keeping him prisoner in his own body, would be given president. The boy, whoever he really was, could easily be dealt with later.

"Boy!" he hissed under his breath, carful not to call too loud. There was no response. "Boy... err..." he tried to remember his name. "Mer- Merlo... Merlin!" He heard a thunk from inside the wardrobe.  "You... you can hear me?" 

Another cluster of taps from the inside of the wood.

"Good... good..." he recalled the tight fabric Morgause had secured around his mouth, preventing the boy from speaking. "How about... two knocks for yes, one knock for no."

There were two knocks. Yes.

"Alright..." Uther thought about his strategy. "Are you... are you injured in anyway? Did she harm you?"

One knock. No.

"So if we had to make a break for it, you'd be able to run?"

There was a pause, before another singular knock. No.

"Why?" There was no response. "Oh, I mean..." He wracked his brain, trying to think of a way to ask the question in the acceptable format. "Is it those restraints that would prevent you?"

Two knocks this time. Yes. 

"Well, we'd find a way to get those off." Personally, Uther would prefer if those restraints remained on, but knew that the boy would be useless in helping him escape if he could barely move. "Can you see anything in the room at all?"

There were three knocks this time.

"Three? Do you mean, maybe?"

Two knocks. Yes. 

"So, a little bit? You can see a little bit?"

Two knocks. Yes. 

"Okay." Uther didn't yet know how this information could be used in their escape, but as a king, he was trained to gather every speck of information before making a plan. "I don't know how we're going to get out of this, boy. Even if we're going to get out of this. But, I think that if we do it together we'll stand a much stronger chance. Now, before you agree or disagree, let me just say... I know you have no reason to trust me, just as I have no reason to trust you, but-"

There was one knock. No. 

"No? No, what?" He narrowed his eyes. "You think there is a reason I should trust you?" he asked, trying to keep the disgust from his voice. 

No response came to this question. 

"Listen, we have no reason to trust each other, that's the truth. I don't know how you've been deceiving my son all this time, but I'm willing to forget that at the moment. Surviving this ordeal is more important. The enemy of your enemy is your friend. And I think we can both see that witch as an enemy."

Two knocks from the inside of the wardrobe. Yes. 

"I'm glad you agree."  Although, they did not agree. Uther planned on executing the boy as soon as he was given the chance, as soon as his use expired. But he didn't need to know that. Not yet. "You'd better rest then, but keep your mind open. The chance to escape could surprise us at any moment."   

Chapter Text

Arthur knocked on the door of the small stone hut. He and his men had set off on their patrol several days ago, but had found nothing. They didn't dare venture too far into Cenred's lands, not yet anyway, stopping just short in Ealdor to rest and replenish their supplies. Arthur was frustrated, not only with their unfruitful trip, but also with himself. How could he have been so stupid! Of course Morgause didn't leave any visible trail! This was just a waste of time! 

The door creaked open and the friendly dark haired woman smiled at him. 

"Prince Arthur! What a pleasant surprise. What brings you to Ealdor?" She peered passed him and Arthur felt a twinge of guilt as he realized she must be looking for her son. "Is Merlin with you?" Her smile faltered. Arthur knew the grim expression he wore on his face must have told her everything. "Please, come in."

He followed her inside and took a seat next to the barrel that functioned as a table as she sat worriedly on crates stacked in the corner. 

"There was an attack on Camelot. A sorceress named Morgause brought a curse on the Citadel that forced everyone into a deep sleep. Merlin and I were away at the time, so we weren't effected as quick, but eventually... we succumbed to it. Morgause was attacking at that time with these terrifying knights... I thought we were all going to die, but... we didn't. We woke up and everything was fine. Morgana said she fought off Morgause and wounded her, forcing her to flee. But after the attack, after everything cleared, we couldn't find Merlin. At first I thought, he must be around somewhere and I would find him after everything settled, but it's been days and there's no sign of him! I... I..." He had to catch his breath, the worry in his voice reaching a breaking point. "I don't know where he is and I'm afraid it has something to do with that witch, Morgause. I fear she's done something to him, taken him somewhere... I don't know what I'm supposed to do or how I'm supposed to find him!" He massaged his brow with his gloved hand. "I'm sorry Hunith. Your son is lost and it's all my fault."

There was silence for a moment before Hunith rose from her seat and approached the prince. She put a comforting hand on his shoulder. Of course Hunith would try to comfort him, Arthur thought. He couldn't imagine Hunith being mad at anyone, even if they were responsible for putting her son in danger.

"I've been out here, searching Camelot's lands, all the way along the border, but I don't even know which direction she fled!"

"Prince Arthur-"

"When I first realized he was missing I thought he might have come here to... I don't know why he would come without telling me, but I thought he might have wanted to visit you... I don't know, but it's evident he's not here so..." he rose from the table. "I'd better be off to continue the search."

"Prince Arthur, please!" Hunith tried a little more forcefully. "You need to stop moving so fast. You look exhausted, you need to rest. How about you and your men stay here for the night. Then you can continue on your way in the morning."

"I can't rest now, not when Merlin is out there alone."

"And if you do find him now, what are you going to do? How are you going to fight off his captors in such an exhausted state? I want you to find Merlin as much as you do, but you can't stop taking care of yourself. It defeats the purpose of a search!"

Arthur sighed. "You're right... you're right..." He plopped himself back down in the rickety chair. "I just feel awful. He... he's probably out there alone and I can't help him. He's in danger because of me."

Hunith knelt down next to him. "There's a part of me that agree's with you, that wants to blame you for leading my son into trouble," she smiled weakly. "But then I think back and I realize... Merlin is capable of finding trouble all by himself, always has been." 

Arthur's lip curled slightly at the thought of Hunith running after Merlin as he grew up, always finding new shenanigans to tangle himself in.

"And he's stronger than you give him credit for. He can handle himself. He might not be as handy with a sword, but he has other attributes that will keep him safe. I'm sure of it."

This received an audible chuckle from the prince. "I mean, on one hunting trip he did talk a bandit out of killing us."

"You see?!" Hunith laughed at the thought. Little did Arthur know, Merlin's ability to talk bandits to death hadn't been what she referred to.

The pair lingered in the moment of serenity before their minds slowly sank back into the reality of the situation. 

"You will stay the night. There is no question about it."

<<o>>

"We've been through this before, Merlin, but you're going to go through it again." Morgause stalked in front of the boy tied to the chair. She noticed him looking desperately passed her, trying to catch Morgana's eye who stood at the edge of the room. 

It was midday, and light spilled through the stained windows creating a pleasant and peaceful atmosphere, contrary to what was actually transpiring within the king's chambers. Uther remained placid at his desk, going about his business as usual under the orders of Morgause. Occasionally, he glanced up at the scene before him, attempting, in vain, to regain his will.

"I implore you to be honest with me this time. I do have plans for you if you refuse and I'm warning you, it is not pleasant."

Merlin refused to look at Morgause, continuing to try and catch the eye of Morgana. 

"Do you understand?"

He didn't answer her.

"That's not a good start, Merlin." She came closer. "But we can begin nonetheless." She gave him a menacing smile. "You are a dragonlord. There's no question about it, there's no point trying to lie to me or my sister because we know."

"I don't know what you're talking about." He gritted his teeth, repeating something he had told Morgause many times in the past few days."

"As you've said." Morgause turned to her sister and raised an eyebrow.

"No," Morgana said. "He's lying. He is a dragonlord. I saw it. I saw him speak to Aithusa, I saw him change his will."

"Do you think he's lying?"

"Yes. How could he not be?"

"It is possible he speaks the truth. You cannot be born a dragonlord. It is a power inherited only from father to son, but only after the father dies."

"But Merlin's father..." Morgana looked to the servant.

"You don't know, do you?"

"I thought he died."

"That's what the boy claims."

"But you think..."

"I think he's lying. I think he's lying to protect his father. If his father is alive, he may be hiding him."

"I'm not!" Merlin protested. "I've told you, I've never met him!! He was gone before I was born!!" Morgana and Morgause ignored him and continued to have their conversation. 

"We could go to his village and interrogate his mother."

Morgana watched as Merlin's eyes grew wide. "No!! Please leave my mother alone! She's innocent! Don't hurt her!!" 

"Why are you obsessed with Merlin being a dragonlord in the first place?" Morgana asked, embarrassingly distressed at the thought of sweet Hunith at her sister's mercy. She remembered liking the woman when she had come to Camelot, helpless when her village was attacked.

"We need a sword forged in a dragon's breath if we are to put a final end to your doom, an end to Emrys. That, along with a powerful spell to weaken the boy before the sword is used, should to the trick."

"Nothing else will do?"

"No. And I doubt the Great Dragon would fix you such a weapon, not without some encouragement from a dragonlord."

"Well... maybe... maybe his father isn't dead yet. Maybe he became a dragonlord later than I thought."

"It is possible, but there are ways to be sure..."

Morgana bit her lip. "Is it...?"

"Yes."

"Oh," she said quietly. She looked to Merlin who looked up at her with wide eyes, with innocent eyes. NO! She screamed at herself. In her mind she replayed the memory of the wicked Emrys standing over her as she suffered on the floor, impervious to her desperate cries for help. Even if this Merlin hadn't betrayed her, he was still capable of doing her harm, right? She turned away from his imploring gaze, hardening her expression. "Then we should be sure." She walked back to the outskirts of the room, not wanting to be near the young boy any longer. 

Morgause smiled at her sister's decision. "I do as you ask." She made her way over to the bedside cabinet and pulled out a small bottle of black liquid from the drawer. She uncorked it as she walked back to Merlin and placed it on the table next to him. The boy began to struggle, unsure of what the liquid was, but sure he did not want to come into contact with it. Morgause drew a knife from her belt and held it aloft, causing Merlin to struggle even more desperately. 

"Calm yourself. This won't kill you, remember?"

"What is that?" Merlin asked, panicked. 

"Just something that will help us see what you see."

"I-"

She moved her arm in one swift motion, dragging the knife across his chest, leaving a deep cut. Merlin cried out in pain. 

"Oh, that reminds me..." She shoved the gag back into his mouth. She pulled his shirt back, exposing the wound and gripped the small vile in her hand. She poured the thin black liquid into the cut. "Bemeldian," she said forcefully. The liquid steamed along with Merlin's blood. He let out a muzzled scream. "Don't fight it Emrys!!" Morgause looked to her sister and beckoned her closer. "Morgana, come here!"

"I-"

"Now, please!"

Morgana obeyed her sister. "Wh- why?" she asked, quite uncomfortable. She found herself unable to look at the boy who continued to scream and moan in pain. 

"I think it will be easier if you do the interrogating."

"Oh... why?"

"Even in this instance, you may be a friendlier and familiar face." Morgause guided Morgana's hand to the deep cut, now stained with the black liquid. The dark substance had begun to leak out and away from the wound, seeping  into the veins surrounding the cut skin. Morgause admired her work. "This is a potion, designed by the high priestesses of the old religion. It will allow you into the very mind of a victim. Once you're there, it's harder to conceal information. We will be able to tell if he's hiding something about his father."

Morgana nodded. She had tortured many of her enemies from a time yet to come in a similar fashion. 

"You have used something like this before?"

"I have."

"Good then." Morgause pushed Morgana's hand into the cut. 

Instantly Morgana's mind clouded over, her thoughts became distracted and obsolete. She was hurtling towards the Earth at breakneck speed. She saw flashes, images, moments of Merlin's life. Some she recognized, some she did not. She tried to focus, pressing for the information she and her sister needed. Your father, where is your father? For a moment she saw Merlin's eyes in front of her. They were wide and full of terror, shocked by the way his former friend could cause him such pain. She heard him crying out to her. Why, why, why? Why, Morgana? Why? 

She suppressed her initial rage, choosing to press his mind in a gentler style. Her consciousness appeared, sitting comfortably in a chair next to a table. Across from her, was Merlin. She heard the crashing of waves and realized they sat on a beautiful rocky beach. Merlin looked around, recognizing his surroundings. 

"What's happening?" he asked. "This is... Gedreff?" He stared at the goblet in front of him. He looked at Morgana. "Morgana, what's going on?! Why are you doing this?! Morgause said..." he stumbled over his words. "Morgause said you had memories of something, memories of the future... but that can't be real. How could that even be possible!!?"

"I'm not here to answer your questions."

"But-"

"You're here to answer mine."

Merlin gulped. 

"What do you know about your father."

"I don't know anything! I said I didn't!"

"What do you remember of him?!"

The scene drifted in and out. A memory faded into of her vision. Amidst total darkness a deep voice echoed from above. She couldn't understand the words, but a deep sense of calm washed over her. 

She was back, sitting at the table on the beach, across from Merlin who winced and clutched his head. 

"Stay out. Please, stay out," he moaned. 

"I'm sorry, Merlin." Morgana put a hand over her mouth to prevent a sob from escaping her lips. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do!" She cursed herself for crying. Why was she so weak? Merlin's pain should amuse her, satisfy her, not distress her. Morgana gritted her teeth. She needed to be stronger. 

Merlin screamed as the same memory flashed before them, the deep voice amongst the total black.

"I need to hate you. I'm supposed to enjoy this!"

"Please, please! I tried to help you! I tried to help you."

"I-"

"I want you to see what I see, please! Morgause doesn't want peace, she wants domination. Is that truly what you want? To lose everyone along the way!"

Morgana thought long and hard about what she wanted. She wanted her mother back, she wanted her father, not Uther, but Gorlois to see her talents, she wanted magic to be free, she wanted Morgause to be happy, she wanted...

"The only way magic can be free in Camelot is if someone with magic takes the throne," she said coldly, forcing her way through the dried tears on her cheeks. 

Merlin shook his head, desperation in his eyes. 

"Morgause didn't lie to you, Merlin. I do have memories of the future, memories that stretch for years. The time was that I hated you. I wanted to subject you to a cruel end for years for what you did to me, but now... things have changed. I pity you. I really do. Magic will never be truly free with Uther or even Arthur on the throne and I pity the man who cannot see that. But Merlin, you stand in the way of your own freedom. You stand in the way of our freedom! So, as much as it pains me to see you like this, someone who used to be my friend, someone who's like me... it is a necessary sacrifice I have to make."

"You don't-"

"I do." She could't contain her sobs any longer. "I have to kill you. It's the only way..."

"Morgana-"

"Stop talking! It pains me to listen to you!"

"Morgana, please!"

"Where can I find a blade forged in a dragon's breath!?"

She was surprised that this triggered another memory. She saw flashes of Kilgharrah, breathing on a beautiful blade as Merlin watched. Then she saw a lake, one she recognized, and the sword flying through the air, landing in the mirky depths. Just as quick as the memory started, it ended. 

She stared at Merlin. "The lake of Avalon."  

"Please..."

"You've already made one," she said quietly. "You've already forged Arthur's sword... Excalibur..." 

"No, no! I- I haven't!"

"How do I find it, Merlin?"

Merlin's face scrunched up in pain as he tried to resist the question. He whimpered.

"Make it easier on yourself, Merlin. Please just..." She didn't need to finish. A new flash came before her. It was the lake again, but this time the sword was emerging from the depths, grasped in the delicate hand of a woman.

"No! Leave her alone!!"

This time, Morgana was not only forced out of a memory, but forced out of Merlin's mind entirely. Uther's chambers swirled back into view as she stumbled back into her sister's arms. Merlin still struggled in the chair, the black liquid having made its way through his chest and up the veins of his neck. 

"Sister!" Morgause lowered Morgana into a chair. "What happened? Did you uncover the truth?"

Morgana nodded, but took a moment to catch her breath. "Yes. Yes, I did. He was telling the truth about his father. However," she paused, giving her sister a serious look, "it is of no consequence. Merlin has already created a sword forged in a dragon's breath."

"Where is it?"

"Hidden in the lake of Avalon."

"Then, I must leave at once!" Morgause said, making her way towards the door. 

"Wait-" Morgana called out to her. "Let... let me go instead."

Morgause stared curiously at her. "Is there a reason why?"

"Umm..." In truth, Morgana didn't quite understand her motives herself. She just had a strong feeling that she should be the one to retrieve the sword, like something in that memory she saw was calling out to her. Instead she said: "I haven't felt like I've actually been doing anything. I've just been sitting around in the castle, waiting and waiting. I want to feel useful."

Morgause thought for a moment, then retreated from the door. "Very well. But please be careful, sister."

"I will." Morgana turned her back to Morgause, uncomfortable with how accustomed she had grown to lying to her sister. "I'll be back with the sword as soon as I can." 

Chapter Text

"Boy? Boy, are you awake?" Uther asked gravely. 

Two knocks. Yes. 

Uther paused for a moment. Then, decided to ask the question that had been plaguing his mind. "I wonder how long Morgana has been enchanted... We must release her. I'm sure she's struggling against it, as am I."

At first, there was no response, then just one simple knock. No. 

Uther had dreaded that answer. The way his ward was acting... she didn't seem hard pressed, it didn't seem like she was acting under someone else's volition. Morgana was willingly letting her guardian suffer under the control of an evil enchantress and it shattered Uther's heart. "No? You don't think she's enchanted."

One knock. No. 

A tear escaped Uther's eye, but he was quick to wipe it away even though there was no one to see it. "She has betrayed me?"

Two quiet knocks. Yes. 

Uther pulled himself together. "No, I refuse to believe it! She can still be saved."

No response. 

"But first, we have to escape ourselves."

Two knocks. Yes. 

Uther took a deep breath. Years of violent wars and battles had hardened him, giving him the ability to shove his emotions deep into the recesses of his mind when they weren't convenient. "I think I have an idea." 

<<o>>

Even though it was barley evening, Morgana could barley see anything as she rode against the rain. It wasn't a heavy downfall, but it chilled her through to the bone nonetheless. 

"Pylece," she said and was pleased when the warmth returned to her body. Although her magic had not yet returned to the state it was in before she met Kyulds, it was getting better. Kyulds... she hadn't seen him in quite some time. She wondered when he would make his next appearance. Given that Merlin still wasn't dead, he was surely bound to make one. 

She slowed her horse when she reached the clearing. The trees parted to reveal a lake that sparkled with each rain drop that fell on its surface. She dismounted and approached the water, unsure of what to do next. 

She held her hand above the water. "Agiefan!" Nothing. She tried again. "Ahebban!" Again, nothing. Maybe she should have allowed her sister to retrieve the sword. Maybe she would have known what to do. But, Morgana still could not shake the strange feeling that had persisted since she looked into Merlin's mind. Something was here and something wanted her. Not a moment later, she realized what it was. 

The water rippled in waves against the shore, greeting a young maiden who began to emerge from the water. Instantly, Morgana recognized her. Kyulds had once inhabited her shape. She had long dark hair that clung to her skin. Her brown eyes were warm and wise, fixing Morgana with a penetrating gaze. The blue fabric that made up her dress was a shear blue and drifted around her waist, suspended by the water. In her hand she grasped a sword, which Morgana knew must have been excalibur. 

The women simply stared at each other for a long moment, their eyes locked together. The woman in the lake was the first to speak. 

"Morgana, you know you're not supposed to be here."

"Something brought me here, to this lake. Something called out to me."

She smiled. "I was the one to call out to you, but that's not what I was referring to. I meant, I know you shouldn't be here, in this time."

"Oh... you know?"

"I do. I know what you've done, but more than anyone, I know it wasn't your fault."

Morgana drew closer. "Not my fault?"

"Kyulds would have brought you back whether you were willing, or not."

"You know Kyulds?"

She nodded, solemnly. 

"Who are you?"

"My name is Freya. In time, legend will christen me, the Lady of the Lake."

"How do you know all this? about legend and futures?"

"I have lived it before, much like you are living things again now."

"Living things again... my second chance." She sighed. "Although, it feels more like a continuation of everything as opposed to a second chance."

"And you would be right. Destiny only continues, it never moves back."

Morgana thought about this statement for a moment, but brushed it off, realizing there were more important things at hand. "And what was your aim? calling me here? Are you going to help me? or will I have to take that from you by force?" She said sharply, gesturing to the sword. 

Freya glanced down at the weapon, then looked sympathetically at Morgana. "I am going to help you, but not in the way you think."

Morgana glared at her. "So... forcefully then?" She steadied her stance, preparing for a fight. 

Freya simply shook her head. "No, I will give you the sword willingly, but you must promise me something."

"I'm listening."

"First, you must promise me that you will listen to your own mind, your own thoughts, your own feelings, not your sister's."

"I already-"

"And the second thing." From within her dress she pulled a small box, one that fit in the palm of her hand. She came towards the shore and placed the box in Morgana's outstretched palm. "You will give this to Kyulds when you see him."

"What is it?" Morgana asked, attempting to open the box.

"It will only open for him."

"My question still stands."

"I'm sorry, Morgana."

"You're not going to tell me?"

Freya smiled warmly. "No."

Morgana took the box and was surprised by how light it was. She looked at Freya. "I'll do it."

Freya gave Morgana another warm smile. "Thank you, Morgana."

"The sword?"

Freya tossed the blade to Morgana, who caught it by the hilt. Droplets of water cascaded off the blade as it travelled through the air. "Know this, Morgana... if you stray from the decided bargain, the sword will disappear from your hand and return to mine."

"I understand."

"Good," said Freya. "Morgana... you have autonomy. You have a choice. You always have." She was gone with another gust of wind that rippled across the lake. Morgana found that her eyes lingered on the spot where Freya had once been, her mind having trouble accepting the girl's sudden disappearance. Morgana held excalibur aloft. It seemed to stare back at her, daring the witch to use its power for something alternate to its true purpose. She retreated to her horse, covering the glint of the sword in a thick burlap cloth before tucking it into her saddle. She placed the small wooden box in the pocket of her dress. 

She mounted her mare and  took one last thoughtful look at the lake of Avalon, before trotting off, wanting to reach Camelot before the light rain became much worse.

<<o>>

Arthur was tense, he was tired, he was dejected, he felt hopeless, but most of all, Arthur was terrified. He was terrified he would never see his best friend again and he was terrified it was he himself who had failed to protect the young boy.

The Prince and his few selected men were headed back in the direction of Camelot empty handed. They had found no sign of Morgause or Merlin. But what did you expect to find, Arthur's mind tortured itself. 

A light rain began to fall as they continued to ride along the well beaten path. Arthur considered halting their journey so as to continue in the morning, but didn't want to waste any more time then they already had. He ordered they press on. 

"If we continue to ride through the rain, we'll reach Camelot by nightfall!" The men seemed uncomfortable with that decision, but his men's happiness couldn't be farther from Arthur's mind.

He ran through the past few days in his mind, remembering Hunith's kindness and hospitality even in the face of the man who killed her son. You're being ridiculous, Arthur told himself. Merlin isn't dead and if he was you didn't kill him, how are you supposed to keep track of everything your servant does? How can you be held responsible for every decision he makes?! Arthur urged his horse to go faster. No matter how many times he told himself there was nothing he could have done, his mind still raced, coming up with new creative solutions for how it was his fault. It was a strange feeling. He hadn't truly realized until this moment how much he cared about Merlin.

He came out of his mind prison just in time to slow his horse and avoid another rider on the path ahead. He urged his horse forward so he rode next to the stranger, intrigued by the elegant green cloak that billowed elegantly around their shoulders.

"Morgana?"

The rider turned her head and Arthur's suspicions were confirmed. "Arthur, what a-"

"What on earth are you doing out here in the rain? You'll get sick, or attacked, or... or lost."

"Arthur, please..." she brushed him off casually, although she seemed to shift uncomfortably in her saddle like she was hiding something. Arthur spotted the burlap that clung tightly to what must have been the shape of a sword. "I've been around these woods all my life, I know my way around. As for the rain, I'm on my way back because of it."

"I see you've brought at least some protection," Arthur said, gesturing to the sword with a jerk of his head. "But you're not supposed to keep it covered up like that, it kind of defeats the purpose."

Morgana rolled her eyes. 

"Here," he reached for it, but Morgana pulled it away sharply. 

"Don't touch it!"

"Okay, sorry!" Arthur said, backing off. He was honestly too tired to have such a pointless fight that he would eventually lose. "Do what you want, I'm too busy to care."

They rode in silence for a few minutes before Arthur spoke. "In case you were curious," he began bitterly, "I didn't find any sign of Merlin."

"Oh..."

"Because it seemed like you cared so much to ask me," he finished sarcastically. He wasn't really angry with Morgana, his tired mind just seemed to want to hurl something at anyone and everyone around him.

"I was going to ask you if you'd found him-"

"But you didn't."

"You didn't give me the chance!" She looked over at him and Arthur could see genuine pity in her watering eyes. "I care about him too." She sighed. "Maybe I was afraid to ask because I already knew the answer."

Arthur brought a gloved hand up to his face, trying to hide his own tear filled eyes. "I'm sorry." His voice broke. 

"I'm sorry too."

The pair slowed their horses, letting the other knights ride ahead so their conversation would not be disturbed. 

"There's just... there's just something I don't think I could ever be ready to lose..."

"Merlin?"

"I don't know what it is, Morgana. He's a fool, surely, but he's got charm and he's got wit. He's a charming witty fool, but it's not only that. He's got this kind nature that I've rarely seen in anyone else. He's got to help anyone who needs him and wants everyone to be feeling at their best, feeling alright... but... but most of all..." he tried in vain to collect himself. "He's the only person who's ever treated me like a real human being."

"What do you mean?"

"He's the only one who's ever come up to me, asked me how I was doing and really been curious to know the answer. My father, the nobles, they only care about my safety and health so that one day I can become the king I'm meant to be."

"I'm sure that's not true. I know you're father-"

"Don't lie."

"I know he loves you. It's obvious how Uther cares for you."

"Cares... maybe he cares about me, but he doesn't know me. Not like Merlin. Not like Merlin who actually takes the time to find out." Arthur stared at the light rain as it fell on the foliage, thinking about the young boy who challenged the crown prince to a fight, all so he could protect a complete stranger. "And I give him no reason to care. I... I overwork him... I take him for granted, but he still always comes back for me. He looks out for me. He's brought me to a place where I can feel comfortable with my actions. He humbles me and... and now I've thrown him to the hands of a merciless witch." He hung his head. "And what's he ever done?" Morgana didn't answer. "Nothing. He's done nothing to deserve that. Nothing but go beyond the line of duty. Nothing but try the best he can to make others around him happy. He didn't choose to remain my servant. No, that was my choice. I should've looked after him."

"You did all you could."

"Yeah, I did. And I failed. Why did she have to take him? Why couldn't she have taken me?! Merlin just tries to make those around him happy. He's innocent, how could someone be so cruel? so heartless?!"

"I'm sorry..."

Arthur did his best to reel back his emotion, embarrassed by his outburst. "I... I just need to focus on finding him... I just need to find him. I need to know he's safe."

"I didn't know you felt this way."

"Neither did I. It's a shame it took something like this to happen for me to realize it."

The pair sank into silence once more, both trapped deep in their own thoughts. They remained that way until they reached the towering walls of the citadel. 

<<o>>

Morgana cautiously entered Uther's chambers, letting the door shut gently behind her. Her lip trembled slightly, Arthur's words still echoing through her mind. 

In her hands, she clasped Excalibur, wrapped in the burlap. Morgause, who was sitting at the table, rose suddenly when she entered, her eyes glinting when she saw the shape of the sword.

"You were successful then?"

Morgana nodded. "I was."

Morgause approached her sister, her heels clicking menacingly on the stone floor as she walked. She reached for the sword. "May I-"

Morgana surprised herself by pulling back, recoiling from her sister's request.

"Morgana?"

"I'm sorry..." She shook her head, trying to brush off whatever had come over her, and handed Morgause the sword. She let the burlap fall away, revealing the intricate gold markings and the shining light it possessed even in a room lit only by candles.

"Exquisite..." Morgause whispered.

"What do you plan to do with it?"

"It will be used to end Emrys' life, when the time comes. And don't forget it, the time draws nearer as we speak."

Morgana closed her eyes. "I need more time," she said quietly.

"Not an option!" Morgause answered sharply. She realized her mistake, the violent outburst had startled Morgana, so she took a calming breath before continuing. "I mean... Morgana please..." She placed Excalibur on the table and beckoned Morgana closer. "Do you really want to waste more time idling over the boy? The end will always be the same no matter how long you procrastinate. Emrys will be dead, why do you insist on waiting?... unless..." Morgause's brow furrowed. "You have lost your intentions..."

They stared at each other, neither wanting to be the first to break the silence, nor the first to break their gaze. 

"I-" Morgana tried. "Of course not."

"I'm sorry to say it, but I'm having a little trouble believing you... sister."

Morgana narrowed her eyes. "What does it matter if you believe me? I am the one with knowledge of the future. You should be happy with whatever decision I make."

"You may posses knowledge from the future, but you do not seem to posses wisdom from the past... from our ancestors."

"Oh, I posses plenty of their second hand wisdom, I studied under you for more than a year, remember?"

"Your foolish decisions are making it hard for me to truly believe that that version of me was successful at transferring that wisdom!"

A new voice came from somewhere in the shadows. "Ahh... that is the question, isn't it? Is wisdom more valuable if it comes from the past, or from the future?" Both women turned to see who had spoke. A figure, engulfed in shadow, moved towards them slowly. 

"Kyulds?" Morgana recognized the taunting inflections in his voice. 

"Indeed I am." His voice was tired and haggard. Something was different this time. Instead of taking the form of someone or something, he seemed to be in his own improvised form. The form of a tall man with pulsating shadows hanging off every inch of his body stood before them. The darkness formed a cloak with a large hood that concealed his face. Only his smirking mouth was visible. "I have been told that I am one to beat over a dead bush," he said, "so imagine my surprise to find that in this case, the bush hasn't even been killed yet!" He turned to Morgana. "I thought I warned you that I wanted the boy dead as soon as possible."

Rage bubbled within Morgana, rage and frustration that she thought she had left behind in the future. "And I thought I told you that I wasn't exactly finished with him yet!"

Kyulds clicked his tongue. "Careful what you say..."

"No, you be careful, Kyulds, if that really is your real name, because correct me if I'm wrong, you expect me to follow orders from someone who I know next to nothing about?!"

"I've given you a gift, Morgana, and you are extremely close to wasting it."

"I don't care about your gift, I don't care about your chance! I want answers!"

Chapter Text

"Answers!" Kyulds laughed. "You want answers?"

"Yes," Morgana said defiantly. "If you want Merlin dead so strongly, enough that you're willing to turn back time and employ me to do it, then there must be a dam good reason! What did he do to you?! Why are you so hell bent on killing Merlin?!!"

"You have no right-"

"And if I'm not mistaken, you have strictly employed me to do this dirty work for you, which implies one thing: you can't do it yourself. An all powerful being who can manipulate time itself, somehow can't figure out or simply does not have the ability to do his own filthy work! I want to know, why? Why must he employ Morgana Pendragon when he seems perfectly capable himself?"

A gust of wind enveloped them both. Morgana felt herself being pressed up against the wall, Kyulds positioning himself less than an inch from her face, his hands digging into her shoulders. She saw now, the distorted image of what lay under his disguise: the fragmented form of a face with two glowing orbs for eyes. 

"And most of all, why do you hide your true form?" She narrowed her eyes in mock sympathy. "Or... is this your true form? Have you forgotten who you are?"

"That's enough!!" He gritted his teeth. "I will return to you within the hour! I am giving you one last chance. If I return and the boy still breaths, I will find you a fate worse than death!!" His voice echoed through the chamber, every surface repelling the sound like it was diseased. 

For the first time since Morgana arrived in the past, she felt true primal fear. Not a fear that she would ruin her second chance, not the fear of losing her magic, but the real guttural fear that she would lose her life. Kyulds swirled his cape of shadows, extinguishing all the candles that lit the room. With another gust of wind, his presence escaped through an open window.

Morgana and Morgause stared at the spot where he vanished from their view, wondering if was going to make a sudden reappearance. Morgause was the first to break the silence. 

"You should follow his instructions, Morgana."

Morgana narrowed her eyes and stalked around the room, relighting the snuffed candles with a muttered word. "Why should I?"

"He is powerful. He is dangerous..."

"And he is untrustworthy, and he is a liar. I don't know why I ever trusted him in the first place."

"You never trusted him, Morgana, you feared him, and rightly so. In all my years of training I never witnessed a being like that...a being that... I can't even start to describe what kind of being he must be, what power he must possess."

Morgana stopped next to the bed and held onto the bedpost. "I'm not afraid of him, Morgause. I mean, I am... I am afraid of him, but I don't care. He can do what he wants to me... I'm not giving up my free will."

"Morgana-"

"I've gone over it over and over in my head," she said agitated, beginning to pace the distance between the bed and the table. "Merlin... Emrys... myself... everything's connected, everything's... everything's different." She looked directly at her sister. "There's something I was missing, Morgause. Something I was missing after you died and I left the citadel. Something that I didn't realize I was missing until I came back here and found it again."

"Morgana, please-" Morgause tried to reach out to her sister, but Morgana took a step back.

"We were wrong, Morgause, we were wrong. There's so much more than we thought... I... I... it's more complicated than just right and wrong, good and evil." A sudden realization made her legs weak, she crumpled down to sit on the bed. "I... I lost myself. I was gone..." Tears blossomed in her eyes. "I hurt people, innocent people... I murdered, I tortured, I... I-"

"You did what you had to do to stay alive."

Morgana glared at her, the love fading from her eyes. "No. No, that's only what you think. I abandoned love and reason to voyage after something I already had." She thought about the way Arthur spoke to her in the woods, the worry in his eyes as he desperately searched for his missing servant, the heartbreak in his voice when he believed he may never see him again. In her time in hiding, Morgana had always felt pity for herself. No one had cared for her like that. "I always blamed others for leaving me alone in the darkness... but I'm the one who walked into it in the first place. Everyone who I cared about... I pushed them away chasing some idea, some idea that violence could only be defeated with more violence."

"Morgana, please... do not let these foolish thoughts cloud you better judgment! Fate has told you that Emrys is your doom, you mustn't ignore that. Merlin must be dealt with, why do you refuse to understand this?"

"There's nothing I'm not understanding. Quite the contrary actually, I think it's you who has failed to understand."

"Morgana, Emrys must die!"

"Why do you think you know better than me?!"

"I am simply using the information you gave me to make a rational decision!"

"No! No, you're making the decision for your own best interest. You never loved me, you never cared about me-"

"Morgana, that is untrue! You are the only family I have, or will, ever know!"

"Then how could you do that to me?!" She paused, letting the question sink into the air. "Magic didn't make me a monster, it was you, Morgause. Maybe... maybe the reason people like Uther hate magic is because people like you use it to destroy instead of create!" 

"You don't get to tell me how to fight for our rights, for our lives. You may have knowledge from the future, but as I said before, I have wisdom from the past and it is more valuable than you could ever know." She took a step forward. "You didn't see it, Morgana. How could you know how to bring justice when you didn't witness what we need to bring justice for? It was a slaughter, a bloodbath. Children were separated from their mothers only to be beheaded alongside them in the streets. Friend betrayed friend, enemy clung to enemy, it was carnation, it was despicable, and we deserve retribution!!"

"It just proves my point! Everyone is capable of great acts of evil. I was more like Uther than I realized. Whatever Kyulds has in store for me if I refuse to kill Emrys, I deserve it."

"No," Morgause began, very quietly. "You must kill him. We deserve happiness."

"Must I kill him for me? or am I killing him for you, Morgause? It doesn't matter to you if I live or die. You know what I've told you. You know that Emrys is the cause of both our deaths. He's your doom too. You're only trying to protect yourself."

"Lies," she whispered.

"No, I don't think so."

"I love you, Morgana."

"But not in the right way."

The sisters stared at the floor for a long tense moment, both digesting what had just happened and asking the same questions about what it meant for their future. Morgause eyed Morgana and slowly picked up Excalibur, which still rested on the table. 

"If you are not going to kill Emrys, then you leave me no choice." She approached the wardrobe. "I will kill him myself to save both our futures!"

"Morgause, no!" Morgana tried to stop her, tried to reach her before she did something she couldn't take back, but it was too late. With one fluid motion, Morgause reached the wardrobe and grabbed onto the door. She pulled, preparing to shove the sword forcefully inside, but...

The wardrobe was empty. Morgause stared in shock and horror. She turned back to her sister, rage ablaze in her eyes. 

"You let him go!"

"I did not!" Morgana protested. 

Morgause hurried around the room, checking every conceivable space where he might be hidden. "Morgana, if you're lying to me-"

"I'm not!"

Morgause came to a halt next to Uther's desk. Morgana had barley noticed her father working away, shuffling through and signing papers. He didn't look up as Morgause approached him. 

"Uther..." Morgause growled. " It was you. Where is that boy!?"

"He... I..."

"Morgana! He can't have gone far!" She looked to her sister, a startling fire in her eyes. "Find Merlin!"

<<o>>

It was early in the day when Uther decided to act on his plan of escape. It was a risky plan and relied on many circumstances, but if everything went like he hoped it would...

Morgause and Morgana were torturing the boy, asking him questions Uther didn't quite understand. Morgause had ordered him not to listen. Uther did catch a few words though, something about the boy's father and a dragonlord. 

Morgana left the room soon after that, leaving Morgause alone to retrieve and shove Merlin's limp form back into the wardrobe. Merlin was getting weaker, Uther thought. If he was going to act, it needed to be now. 

Morgause settled herself by the fire once more. Uther got up from his desk and made his way over to her. He couldn't disobey a direct order, that much he had discovered during his time in Morgause's mind prison, but if he could conceivably bend the rules...

Morgause insisted that she review every order that left the kings chambers, this made it impossible to smuggle any sort of cry for help to the outside world, an outside world that believed the king was on a critical bedrest and ordered that he be left alone. Morgause barely allowed him to leave his chambers, only allowing him out once in a while to keep up appearances. 

Once he reached the witch, Uther cleared his throat to get her attention. She held out her hand  and Uther handed her the parchment on which he had written his executive orders for the day. There weren't very many: 

- Deliver food and supplies to the western villages. They are in desperate need of supplies as their harvest for the year was minimal.

- Prince Arthur is to deliver the ceremonial speech for the summer feast.

- A terrible batch of sweating sickness is sweeping its way through the citadel, mostly through the servants from the lower town. To be cautious, servants should be let go for the time being, enough time for the sickness to die out.

Morgause didn't say a word, but nodded and handed the parchment back to the king. Uther gritted his teeth. He could feel the enchantment doing its work. His attempt wasn't enough. 

"I wasn't sure about this one," he said, putting the list back in front of the enchantress. He pointed to the last one. "What do you think?"

Morgause glared at him, obviously exhausted from keeping up her enchantment on Uther and restraining a powerful sorcerer in a wardrobe. 

"I have ordered you to run things as usual, if that's something that you would normally do, although," she sneered, "I can't imagine any of you nobles living without a servant for a day."

"So, I should let the servants go for the week?"

"I do not care what you do!"

"But in you opinion?"

"Yes, fine, whatever, let the servants go permanently for all I care! Just leave me in peace."

Uther nodded and smiled to himself. It was going to work. He was truly going to take Morgause's command to heart and let all the servants go. 

***

He waited until the enchantress fell into a deep slumber, then waited just a few moments longer to be sure she would not easily wake. Uther crept quietly up to the wardrobe and opened the door. When he noticed Merlin's wide eyes from inside the darkened space, he put a finger to his lips, ensuring the boy kept quiet even in his surprise. He looked inquisitively at the king.

"I told you I had a plan, didn't I?" Uther chuckled slightly, trying to find a release from this dire situation. He pulled Merlin out of the wardrobe, giving him the support he needed to stand. "Let's see..." Merlin's mouth was gagged. His hands and legs were chained together, making it impossible for him to stand up straight. Uther examined the restraints. "Can you walk alone?" Uther whispered in a hushed tone? 

Merlin nodded and motioned for Uther to let him try. He limped a few steps, struggling against his chained legs. 

Uther sighed. "I suppose... it's good enough." Again he examined the chains, confirming it would be impossible to break through them with the time given. Merlin tapped him on the shoulder. "What?" He gestured to the gag in his mouth. "Oh, sorry." He untied the back and removed the cloth. 

Merlin took a deep breath. "Thanks."

"I can't leave this room," Uther told him. "Morgause has forbidden it for today. That's what I need you to do. You need to find Arthur and let him know what's going on. Do you understand?"

Merlin nodded. "Yes."

"Do you think you can get there by yourself?"

"I... I think I can do it," Merlin said. Uther looked at the boy. Merlin had dark circles under his eyes. His hair and cloths were filthy and his shirt was covered in something dark that looked like blood. 

"Are you sure?"

"It doesn't matter what I think. I have to be able to do it. So, I will."

Uther was impressed by the boy's resilience. "Then you must be going. As quick as you can, before she wakes up!"

Uther helped Merlin hobble to the door and opened it just enough for him to slip through.

"Please," he said. "Be as quick as you can."

Chapter Text

Merlin struggled through the darkening hallway. Evening light spilled through the windows and transitioned the world into starlight. He didn't dare call out for help, not wanting to alert the wrong person. He didn't know where Morgana was and was in no position to fend off any attack. 

He heard the gentle sound of rain falling on the citadel stones. He reached a window that overlooked the courtyard bellow.  He peered through the misty fog and noticed a group of men in red capes dismount from their horses. He spotted Arthur in an instant. He was about to call out to him when he noticed who he helped off their own horse: Morgana. He watched as she thanked him and hurried up the steps of the citadel, clutching a long object wrapped in burlap. Merlin shivered as he realized what that meant for him. She found the sword. She found excalibur, a blade meant only to be used only by and for Arthur. 

He made his way as fast as he could down the long stretches of hallway, his legs and arms still chained uncomfortably together. By the looks of it, Arthur had been headed to the armory and that's where Merlin intended to find him. 

<<o>>

"Will we have training in the morning, sire?" Arthur jerked his head in the direction of the voice, a young knight, Sir Vinlind, who stood at the edge of the doorway. 

"I... um..." Arthur massaged his temple with a gloved hand. "No... no, we'd better not. Tell everyone they should get some sleep."

"Will do, sire." The young knight bowed and left the prince to himself. 

Arthur slumped down on a bench and began to carelessly take off his boots and armor. He scattered them across the floor, then felt another wave of guilt and sorrow wash over him when he realized there was no one there to pick them up, no Merlin to give him a witty retort about the state of his stench. 

"Prince Arthur!"

He sat up abruptly, startled by the yell of Sir Vinlind from down the hall. 

"Come quick!!"

Arthur was on his feet in an instant. He burst through the door of the armory and into the hall to find Sir Vinlind kneeling over someone who was laying on the floor. 

"Merlin?!" Arthur cried. He kelt down and winced as he saw bruises and cuts covering his servant's body, the most concerning one being a deep dark line across his chest surrounded by disturbing discoloration. 

"Figures it would take a clotpole like yourself so long to rescue me that I'd have to do it myself. And to think-" the servant was cut off by a tight hug from his prince. He hissed in pain. 

"Sorry, sorry!" Arthur said. "Sir Vinlind, go get Gaius!" The knight obeyed, running off in the direction of the physicians chambers.

Arthur teared a piece of fabric off his own shirt and pressed it into Merlin's wound. The servant cried out and clutched at Arthur's arm at the intense pain. 

"I'm sorry, Merlin! I'm so sorry, but I have to stop the bleeding. Was it Morgause who did this to you?! How did you escape?!"

"Arthur... Arthur... it's your father, he... he's in danger."

"What?"

"Morgause she... she kept me in his chambers. She's got him under some kind of enchantment. He was able to break through it long enough to free me, but... she's got him still and I doubt she'll be very happy when she realizes I'm gone."

Arthur stared at him in disbelief. "What are you saying?"

"What do you mean 'what am I saying?'? I've been here in the citadel the whole time! Morgause never left!"

"My boy, where is my boy?!" Gaius' voice could be heard echoing down the hall.

"He's here!" Arthur called.  

Gaius emerged from the darkness, medical bag in hand. When he saw Merlin, his face contorted in a mix of relief at the sight of the boy he viewed as his own son, but horror at the state he was in. "Merlin, what happened?"

"I was just asking him. He says Morgause never left the castle. She kept him here."

"Where?"

"In my father's chambers."

"The king is under an enchantment," Merlin added weakly. 

"Good heavens!"

"Merlin, why did she take you?"

"I-"

"No time for that now!" Gaius exclaimed. "We need to treat this wound. It looks like it's been infected with some sort of potion, but I've only ever seen something like this used... oh Merlin..." Gaius said pityingly, coming to a realization. "What did she do to you?"

Arthur looked wildly from Merlin to the physician. "Why, what is it?"

"It's this substance," Gaius said, running a finger along the black markings surrounding the wound. "I've seen it used before. It is an ancient torture method of the high priestesses of the old religion. It was used to completely open the mind of a victim, causing them to reveal secrets and experience pain beyond what a human can comprehend. Did she interrogate you, Merlin?"

The boy nodded with his eyes closed. "But it doesn't matter now," Merlin said quietly. "She's still here. You have to... we have to get the king..."

"Oh God..." Arthur had to look away from the wound, guilt wracking his body. 

"Arthur!" Merlin grabbed the prince's wrist, forcing him to make eye contact. "Your father, Morgause..."

"She's still hiding in the palace." Arthur gritted his teeth. "And she's got my father under some sort of enchantment."

Merlin forced himself to his feet through Gaius' protests. 

"Merlin, as your physician I think it-"

"We don't have time, Gaius. Just..." he almost tripped over his restraints. "Just get these chains off."

Arthur nodded and ran to get something to break the chains from the armory. He came back with a large battle axe. Merlin shied away. 

"Oh come on, Merlin, don't you trust me?" Merlin closed his eyes and laid out a piece of the chain for Arthur to break. Arthur brought the axe back and swung down with all his strength, shattering the chain and carving a divot into the stone floor.

Merlin sighed in relief. "Thanks." He did his best to shake the rest off. There were still shackles around his wrists and ankles, but the chains connecting them were shattered, allowing him to walk with much more ease. "I'll go investigate my father's chambers," Arthur said, determined. "Merlin, you stay here."

"What? No way!"

"He's right, Merlin," Gaius chimed in. "You need your rest and I need more time to look at your wounds." 

He brushed his guardian away. "I'll be fine. I'm coming."

"No," Arthur corrected. "You're not."

"You can't stop me!" Merlin cried. He broke through the people around him and took off running in the direction of the king's chambers. 

"Merlin!" Arthur called after him. He sprinted after his servant, but turned back to deliver an order. "Sir Vinland, if I do not return within the hour, send a party of knights after me, but not before then. It's important we maintain the element of surprise."

"Of course, my lord!"

"Merlin!" Arthur turned his attention back to the servant running ahead of him. "Merlin, come back! You've been through enough already!"

"You're not going without me!"

"Merlin, please!" Arthur was surprised the boy was able to keep a consistent pace given the extent of his injuries. "Merlin, please... I..." Arthur stopped running. "I can't lose you again!"

Merlin slowed his speed and turned to look at the frozen prince. "You were worried about me?"

"Of course I was!" Arthur said, exasperated. 

Merlin smiled. "Oh..." He blushed. "Should I be flattered?"

"Be whatever you want, I don't care," Arthur finished, disgruntled. He walked the short distance to catch up with the boy. 

"I can't believe you missed me."

"I didn't say that."

"But you implied it."

"Shut up." They smiled at each other. Arthur finally gave up on restraining his royal instincts and pulled Merlin into a firm hug. "I'm glad you're okay, Merlin. I just want to make sure you stay that way."

"Yeah, well..." Merlin began, pulling away slightly. "I want you to be okay too. And I know enough to know that you won't be if you go into that room alone."

"What are you going to do? Annoy Morgause to death?"

He sighed. "I'll do... whatever it takes to keep you safe."

Arthur didn't like the sound of that, but didn't have time to ponder it as another set of footsteps could be heard moving swiftly down the hall perpendicular to their own. Arthur made no move to take cover, but Merlin, fearing it might be Morgana, ducked behind a stone pillar.

"Merlin?" Arthur asked in confusion. 

Sure enough, around the corner came the king's ward, looking exhausted and stressed.

"Morgana, why are you up?"

"Is Merlin with you?"

"Uh... he..."

Arthur didn't need to finish as Morgana had already spotted the young boy crouched behind the pillar. "Merlin, please come out."

"Why should I trust you?!"

Morgana closed her eyes. "I know... I know... you have not reason to."

"Hang on," Arthur said. "He has every reason to-"

"Arthur, please, just for this once, shut up." Surprisingly, he did.

"Merlin," Morgana crouched down next to him. "You're right, you have no reason to trust me right now, but I implore you, please, listen to me now. I was so blind, Merlin. I was so blind. From where I come from, my hatred for you blossomed and grew from a shared mistake that I never forgave you for. I think you forgave me, but I never forgave you. I lost myself, everything that I thought made me who I was was stripped away until there was nothing left. I wanted to kill you. I wanted to torture you, make you suffer, but now... now that I'm back here... I can't seem to find the same hatred that used to rule my heart."

"Morgana, I don't-"

"And you probably have no idea what I'm talking about half the time, about futures and destinies." She took a moment to collect herself. "I'm sorry I was such a fool! I'm sorry I lost sight of everything important, about what magic really is-"

This was too much for Arthur. "Magic?! What do you know about magic?"

"Arthur, shut up!!"

Arthur was shocked into silence.

Morgana turned back to Merlin. "Merlin," she bit her lip nervously. "Let me help you."

"I don't know who you are," Merlin said. 

"I'm just Morgana."

"I don't recognize you at all. You're not Morgana."

"Merlin, I am."

"I... I know. I'm just... you're asking me to trust someone who I don't even know. Someone who watched me hurt... and enjoyed it."

"But, I didn't enjoy it! That's what I'm trying to tell you."

"Yes, and that's supposed to be enough? That's supposed to make me comfortable with you? You wanted to hurt me, you did, and that's when you realized it was wrong..."

"You have no idea what I've been through!"

"Then how about you fill me in!"

"Merlin, there's not enough time! Morgause thinks I'm out here bringing you back as a prisoner." Her eyes were wide and desperate, begging Merlin to see that she was trying to help him. "I'm afraid of what Morgause might do. I've already messed with destiny enough, and now... I'm afraid of what havoc my sister can reek. So please... you can be angry at me later, but right now, there is no time! We have to work together."

Merlin blinked. "You know... my head is spinning right now..." he stuttered. "I'm in no position to make a calculated decision."

"Then don't. Trust me now and reconsider later!"

"Merlin, Morgana, I thought my father was in immediate danger!!" 

"He is," Merlin and Morgana said together.

Arthur stared at them, perplexed. "So... can we save any discrepancies you might have with each other for after we save the king?"

Morgana offered her hand to Merlin. He took it apprehensively and steadied himself with her help. Arthur looked worriedly at Merlin. 

"Maybe... maybe you should wait here with Merlin, Morgana."

"What?! No way!" the warlock yelled. 

"Don't be ridiculous, Arthur. You are the most defenseless one out of the three of us," Morgana said smugly. 

Arthur furrowed his brow in confusion. "What?" He puffed out his chest. "I am a knight and the crown prince of Camelot!"

"And if we don't find Morgause, I'm sure you'll be the king soon enough. Let's go!"

<<o>>

Arthur, Morgana, and Merlin rushed as fast as they could down the dimly lit corridor. Arthur and Morgana did their best to support the struggling servant who was still weak from his time in the wardrobe. 

"Do you think Morgause will have done something to my father?" Arthur panted. "Do you think we will be in time?"

"I don't know, Arthur," Morgana answered. 

"What is even going on?! Were you working with Morgause? Morgana, what have you done?!"

"I don't know, Arthur," she said quieter, shame seeping into her voice. "I don't know." 

"We're almost there!" Merlin called out, snapping Arthur out of his state of confusion and Morgana out of the depths of her guilt. "Morgana, what's the plan?"

"Merlin, you take orders from me!" 

"Don't take offense, Arthur," Morgana said, smiling. "It's just that you don't really have a firm grasp of the situation."

As the trio continued to bicker outside the king's chambers, none of them heard the slight creak that came from the wooden door until it opened completely. Their eyes fell on the man who stood in the open archway. 

"Father?" Arthur asked. 

Uther smiled at his son. "Arthur, thank goodness it's you, my son." The king pulled the prince into a tight embrace. Arthur broke away as soon as possible, confused by his father's demeanor. 

"Uhh... father, we're here to rescue you..."

"Yes, thank you, but I don't need rescuing any more."

"What do you mean?"

"Well... the thing keeping me prisoner was dealt with. I am no longer under his influence."

"What?" Morgana asked, confused. Morgause's pendant was clearly still around his neck.

Uther looked past Morgana and Arthur and pointed to the wounded boy behind them. "He's there, Arthur. He's the one who put me under a spell. He's a wicked sorcerer."

Arthur looked to Merlin, then at Morgana. "What is he talking about?"

"Arthur, he's obviously still under Morgause's control. Merlin wouldn't betray you like that."

"Don't listen to her, Arthur. Morgana has betrayed us. She is working with Morgause."

"Wait... wait..." Arthur looked between his father and Morgana. "Morgana... you admitted to working with a sorcerer... that's what you said, isn't it? You admitted to Merlin you were working with Morgause!"

"I did... I worked with Morgause, but I realized her ways were wrong," Morgana said with increasing intensity, realizing that the prince might be swayed by his father's word. "You have to listen to me! Merlin is not your enemy, nor am I."

"They've both been corrupted by magic! I've only just escaped Merlin's spell!"

"Father-"

"Arthur, please!"

Arthur drew his sword and held it aloft in front of him. He pointed it at Morgana, then at his father, then at Merlin. "Who am I supposed to believe here?!"

"Arthur, it's that necklace around your father's neck! It's what Morgause is using to control him!"

"How dare you, Morgana!! This pendant belonged to Igraine. I wear it always."

"Arthur, he's lying!"

Arthur narrowed his eyes, gaze fixed on the ruby gem. "I know," he said darkly. "I've never seen that pendant before. I would know if it belonged to my mother." He launched himself at his father, tackling him to the ground. Uther put up a fight, kicking at his son and even attempting to draw his sword. Arthur clawed at the pendants chain, attempting to sever the control. 

"Arthur, you mutinous son!!"

"I'm sorry father, it's for your own good!"

Morgana and Merlin kept their distance, keeping their eyes peeled for Morgause, worried she would emerge from the shadows and interfere at any moment.

"Sorry, father! You'll thank me later!" Arthur brought back his fist and drove it swiftly into his father's jaw. The king cried out in pain and brought both his hands back to shield his face. This gave Arthur the perfect opportunity. He quickly grabbed a knife that was tucked into his belt and used it to sever the pendant's chain. He grabbed the gem and hurled it through a nearby window. It shattered the glass as it passed through. The prince took a few steps back, still keeping his sword aloft, wearily watching his father. The king moaned and propped himself up, still clutching his jaw.

"Father?"

"Arthur... thank you..." he said out of breath. 

Arthur sighed in relief. "It's good to have you back."

Uther stumbled to his feet, still dazed from the enchantment. His eyes fell on Merlin. "I wasn't lying about him though. Your servant is a sorcerer!"

Arthur merely blinked in surprise, unable to wrap his mind around this idea. "Excuse me?"

"He's a sorcerer! He has magic."

"Uther, I thought we had a deal!" Merlin shouted. 

"Yes, we did. I said we should help each other escape. I said nothing about what would happen after."

"Oh dear... still on this pointless plight of purging magic, are we Uther?" Morgause approached from behind them all, her footsteps creating ominous echoes down the long hall. Her appearance was disheveled, like she had stopped caring for her appearance or her health. Her dress was dirty and tattered and her hair was pulled back in a messy style. In her hand, she clutched excalibur. The blade glinted in the torchlight, ready for battle.  

Arthur gritted his teeth. "Stay away from my father!"

She rolled her eyes and sighed, her posture and expression revealing how exhausted she was. "I am not after your father, Arthur. At least, not at the moment. After I deal with Emrys, there will be nothing between me and ending the Pendragon dynasty."

"Emrys...?"

"She means me." Merlin stepped forward, holding up his hands in a defensive position. "Get behind me."

"Merlin," Morgana said worriedly. "Your in no condition to fight."

"I'm fine." His jaw tensed in anticipation of an impending attack. 

Morgause laughed. "Well... well... so Morgana, you really are siding with the man who is destined to kill you?"

"I'm siding with what I think is right. A magic that is good and fair, not something used to destroy and control."

"Sister..." Morgause let out a breath. "Whatever happens... I love you." 

Morgana barely had time to take in those words before her sister charged, Excalibur aloft.

"Morgause, no!!" Her sister was headed straight for her. Morgause was trying to kill her! Morgana wracked her brain, trying to think of the right spell, but she had no time. She closed her eyes in anticipation of the blade, waiting... but it never came. She opened her eyes as she heard Morgause scream with rage. Merlin stood between them, hands and eyes glowing with a fire that could turn night into day. 

Morgause recovered from Merlin's blast, preparing her own spell to fire back at the warlock. 

"Arthur get down!!" Morgana screamed. She tackled her brother, forcing him to the floor to protect him from the inevitable carnage that would result from this fight. She saw Merlin fly back, nearly hitting the wall before and invisible force protected him from the blow. Fire flew from his hands towards the enchantress, but she caught it, manipulating it to suite her fancy. It sparkled blue and purple as it danced in her hands, waiting for the next command, but Merlin was too quick. He sent another shockwave towards the enchantress that knocked her off her feet. The walls around them shook with the force of the wave and dust sprinkled around the scene.

Arthur's eyes were wide as he watched his servant take on a powerful enchantress, his jaw slightly agape at the sight. 

Merlin screamed in pain as Morgause sent a blast of energy straight into his open wound. It sizzled in the heat and the dark liquid continued to spread throughout his chest. Merlin's eyes were ablaze again as he fired back, pelting the enchantress with spell after spell until she fell back, tripping over her own skirt. Merlin quickly ran over to her and grabbed the sword from her hand. He stumbled back, wanting to keep his distance from her limp body. An uncomfortable silence overtook them as the dust settled. Morgause didn't move.  

"Is she... Is she dead?" Merlin stuttered. 

Morgause answered the question by reaching out and grabbing his leg. He yelled in surprise as she yanked it, pulling him down beside her. Merlin slid the sword across the floor, trying to keep it away from Morgause. Morgana ran over and grabbed it, pulling it away from Morgause's outstretched hands just in time. The enchantress yelled in rage and turned her attention back to Merlin. She threw him into the stone wall with her magic. Merlin landed on his hands and knees, gasping for air. 

"Morgause, STOP!!" Morgana screeched. "Don't make me do something I don't want to do!!"

"I'm not making you do anything, sister!" She turned to face her. "No one is. That was your choice, wasn't it? What was it you told Kyulds? You didn't want to lose your free will?" She laughed again. "Well, there's the problem with having autonomy. You have to deal with the consequences of your own foolish decisions!" She whipped her power and attention back to the warlock who was still attempting to recover on the floor. She flicked her fingers once, twice, pounding invisible punches to Merlin's already weakened frame. "You will die, Emrys, and I will set my people free!"

Morgana clutched Excalibur's handle between her finger's. She could feel the blade's power, its spirit beneath her hands. She felt its will and realized that the sword resented her. She silently begged it to obey her and complete this one task. She could feel its will give way, its spirit giving her permission to use its power to fight for the life of its creator. She lunged, driving the blade straight through her sister's heart. 

Morgause turned, eyes wide with pain, hurt, and betrayal. She coughed and blood leaked from her lips. "I'm impressed, Morgana," she said. "I didn't think you had it in you." Morgana guided her body to the floor and pulled out the sword. She stared, horrified at her work. Excalibur fell from her hand and clattered loudly on the floor at her feet. 

"I'm sorry," she whispered, as she watched the light completely drain from her sister's eyes. She had watched it go before, when she had sacrificed her life to open the veil, but this was completely different. She had just murdered the woman who had for so long been the only family she had. "I'm so sorry." She fell to her knees and buried her face in her hands.  

"Morgana," Arthur called. "Are you alright?"

"Y- Yes..." she said. "I just... I just need a moment." She wiped her eyes and collected herself, realizing she had to be strong and sure in her choice. 

Merlin stood shakily and made his way over to her. "Morgana," he said. "I can't believe-"

"Hang on," Arthur moved in between the boy and Morgana. "You have magic."

"I'm sorry I-"

"You lied to me!"

"Arthur..." Merlin's voice trailed off, evidently too tired and too injured to even try to explain or defend himself. "Only for you. Always, it's been for you."

"I can't believe this..."

"Arthur, we don't time," Morgana tried. "Yes, Merlin lied to you, but what other choice did he have? He would never hurt you, he's always been there to protect you, even a blind man could see that."

"A touching sentiment... really, very touching Morgana," a cold voice wafted from the shadows. "Unfortunately, you were right in the fact that you, indeed, do not have time for it." Kyulds drifted into view, his cloak of darkness billowing around his shoulders. His eyes glowed with anger beneath his hood. "An impressive display, Morgana. You've never achieved something like this before."

Morgana's blood ran cold as she realized what must be coming next. 

"But you've broken an hour's promise, Morgana. I have returned and the boy still breaths. Merlin still lives." He shook his head, light scattering to avoid the movement. "And I warned you what would happen if you crossed me."

Chapter Text

"And I warned you what would happen if you crossed me..."

"Morgana..." Arthur said tentatively, holding up his sword protectively in front of his father. "Who or... what is this?"

Kyulds turned his head to look at the prince. Although Morgana couldn't see his facial features, she could almost tell he was smiling. A strange, malevolent, hateful grin that flew past Arthur and landed on the king. However, he soon turned his attention back to the prince. "You may call me Kyulds, Arthur Pendragon." He chuckled. "Really... I'm hurt you don't remember me."

Arthur narrowed his eyes. "I think I would remember meeting someone like you."

Kyulds looked down and examined his own form. He sighed. "Yes, well...I'm afraid time has made my appearance... less than appealing." He glided over to where Excalibur lay bloodied on the floor. He shoved the limp body of Morgause roughly out of his way. 

"Don't touch her!" Morgana yelled. 

"You are in no position to command me!" He held the sword in front of him, the usual glint of powerful light that accompanied the blade was enveloped by Kyulds' shadows. The blade almost looked dull in his hands, scratched, and rusted. "How is it you wish to die, Morgana?"

She didn't answer, simply staring coldly back at the shadow. 

"It's only fair if I let you choose," he mocked.

"You have the audacity to speak of fairness? You, who has brought me to a place to complete an impossible task?"

"Impossible? Emrys' death is not an impossibility. Even immortality has its weakness."

"No, I meant impossible for me," Morgana said, the edge and grit coming back into her voice. 

"I do not know what you mean."

"You do. I know you do. I've had a lot of time to think, Kyulds, a lot of time to analyze every word you have said to me. This is not the first time, is it? We've been here before."

Kyulds laughed. As he did so, hundreds of tiny shadows flew off him and scurried into the air like miniature bats. "Why, of course! I rewound time, Morgana!"

"You're avoiding my accusation. This is not my first attempt, is it? This is not only my second chance..."

Kyulds eyed her wearily. "What do you suspect me of, Morgana?"

"I think you've been at this a long time, Kyulds. Why else would, a being with power such as yours be so exhausted, so tired. You seem so close to hopelessness, so close..."

"So close to what?" he whispered.

"So close to... giving up."

"And?"

"And what?"

"What else?!"

"And... and... failure!"

"And?!"

"And... despair!"

"And?!"

"What is the purpose of this?!"

"Keep going, Morgana!"

"And... and... and death!"

"There it is!"

There was silence for a moment, their escalated shouts ending in subdued thought as Morgana tried to digest what Kyulds was trying to tell her.

"I don't understand."

"No. You don't. Why would you?"

"You wish to die?"

"It is my mission."

"But you want to take Merlin down with you..."

"He has become... an obstacle."

Morgana suddenly remembered her promise to Freya, a bargain which she had only half kept. 

"The Lady Morgana..." Kyulds hissed out a laugh. "You had everything. You had friends, you had comfort, you had someone doing their best to look out for you, but still, STILL!!!" His voice shook the hallway, loosening more dust that cascaded down from the ceiling. 

Morgana reached into the pocket of her cloak and felt Freya's small wooden box with her hand. 

"You think you know about pain, Morgana?"

Morgana's jaw tightened. "Pain is the reason I did what I did. It is the cause of... the monster I became."

"No... no, no, no... That was anger. Anger was what caused you to betray Camelot."

"You have no right! You have no right to tell me why I did what I did!! You're wrong, you don't even know!"

In the distance, Morgana could hear the shouts of knights and guards rushing towards them. Arthur seemed to shake himself out of a shocked state and ran over to the open window. 

He called out to them. "We're up here!!! By the king's chambers! We need help!!"

Kyulds made no effort to stop him. "Your faith in your men is impressive, Arthur, but do you really think they stand a chance against me?"

The prince stood his ground. "We have an army! I suggest you stand down!"

Kyulds' hand extended. Instantly the clouding dust thickened as the walls began to shake. One rock came loose from the ceiling, then another. Morgana ran over to Merlin who was unaware of the large cracks spreading above him. 

"Merlin, watch out!" She pulled him to safety, tripping over her skirt and falling with Merlin to the ground. She closed her eyes and did her best to shield them both from the falling dust and debris. 

When the corridor came to a standstill, she opened her eyes, coughing and spluttering as the rock infested air filled her lungs. She looked around and spotted Freya's box on the ground in front of her. It must have fallen out of her pocket with the force of the fall. She quickly grabbed it and examined the rest of their surroundings. The corridor they had come through had completely caved in. Large stones and boulders blocked their way out, or rather, anyone's way in. 

"To be sure that no valiant knights attempt to interfere," Kyulds said, nonchalantly. "I want to make this as easy for me as possible." In his hand, he still held Excalibur which he twirled menacingly. 

"Thanks for that," Merlin said between coughs. 

"Don't mention it," Morgana replied. "It might not matter anyway," she said, eyeing the sword. "If your going to kill Merlin-"

"I'm going to stop you right there, for in this instance, I am going to admit that you were right. I employed you to kill the boy because I... cannot."

"But that's not all. I was right when I said we'd been here before! Don't deny me!"

Kyulds smiled. "Yes... very good, Morgana," he said sarcastically. "This is indeed not the first time I have attempted to use your help. And apparently, it won't be the last."

"Why?!" Merlin blurted out. "Why do you want to kill me?!"

"Because... I hate you." Kyulds enunciated each word with malice. 

"I don't even know who you are!"

"That's the tragedy of it all, isn't it."

"What...?"

Kyulds ignored Merlin and continued to speak to Morgana. "I have sought you out countless times. I have brought you back for endless attempts, each time we ventured to a different time or I take you from a different point in the future, but it doesn't seem to matter!" he fumed. "Each time I am thwarted by your sudden change of heart or your own foolishness!"

"Why are you using me?!"

"Your destiny is fluid, your destiny is malleable."

"My destiny is to die by Emrys' hand!" Morgana said assertively, attempting to push forward her level of understanding. 

"I never said it wasn't!"

"I don't understand!"

"I'm growing tired of this!" He glided towards them, Excalibur in hand. "I'm going to kill you, Morgana. And then I'm going to try again."

Morgana's mind raced. She watched in slow motion as Kyulds approached her. She saw Merlin try to push her out of the way, but with one swift swipe of his hand, Kyulds sent him flying backwards. Shadows danced across Excalibur, causing the rust to ripple like the surface of a lake... the lake... 

Again she remembered Freya's box which she still grasped in her hand. She held it between herself and the sword, hoping beyond hope that it would be enough to grab his attention.

"What is this?!"

"It's... it's a gift from a girl I met! A girl I met who came out of a lake!"

Kyulds froze, the freely flowing shadows around him becoming frosted like ice. 

"She told me to give this to you."

"You..." The sword lowered slightly. "What is it?"

"I don't know..." Morgana took a few steadying breaths as she realized this box might have actually saved her for the time being. "But, she said it was important."

Kyulds reached out and delicately took the box from her outstretched hand. With his touch, the wood began to melt away revealing what was inside. She heard him release a tight breath. She shadows around him began to dissipate, revealing the man underneath. He slumped down to the floor, staring at the contents of the box as the darkness continued to drift into the air and out the window into the night sky. He buried his face in his hands. 

As the last shadow cleared, Morgana stared at his strange attire. It was light brown and made out of a fabric that she couldn't recognize. His pants were tucked into boots of the same color. His top had obviously once been a similar shade of brown, but was now stained with dark dried blood that left its mark stretching all the way up to his neck. He wore a helmet of sorts, not the kind that she was familiar with and saw knights wearing everyday. No, this helmet was rounded at the top and instead of the sharp metallic grey, was the same dull brown. 

"So..." Morgana said as she came closer, trying to catch a glimpse of the man's face or what was inside the box. "You do remember who you are." Kyulds didn't answer. He shook, seemingly trying to control sobs. The box tumbled out of his hand, clattering across the floor and landing near Merlin. 

The boy picked it up and reached inside, pulling out a tiny ripe strawberry. "It's..." he tried, tears clouding his eyes. "Morgana... Freya gave this to you?" 

"Why, what is it?" Morgana questioned, not understanding the significance of the fruit. 

Merlin looked at the strawberry, then to Kyulds. "Morgana..." he said. "I think I do know who he is."

Morgana waited, holding her breath. 

"It's me."

Kyulds raised his head revealing his face. It, too, was smeared with blood. A dark stain covered one eye, leaving it in darkness. Thin lines divided the blood stains on his face, presumably tears that fell so often that they washed away the blood. The eye consumed by the mark shown a constant fiery gold that burned continuously, but the other remained a familiar sky blue. His hair was a mess, dangling like curtains over his eyes and scraping the back of his neck. His ears protruded, but only just, and his prevalent high cheek bones were visible even through the filth.

Morgana gasped. "You... you don't just want to take Merlin down with you when you die..."

"You have to kill me to be able to die..." Merlin finished. 

"But... but... why?" Morgana asked.

"What happened?" Merlin asked, fear in his eyes.

Kyulds looked up, his one golden eye piercing through the dim light. "I'll give you credit, Morgana. Not once in your many attempts did you manage to divulge my true intentions, nor my true identity." He looked to his counterpart, Merlin, who still stared, horrified by his future self. "You on the other hand..."

"What happens?" Merlin asked in an innocent whisper that shattered Morgana's heart. 

Kyulds turned back to Morgana and smiled menacingly. "Well, Morgana, you know the first part. Why don't you tell him what you did?"

"I- I don't know-"

Kyulds stood suddenly, reclaiming Excalibur in his grasp and slicing it through the air with surprising speed. In his hand the blade was still engulfed in magnetized shadows. "I wasn't asking."

Reluctantly, Morgana turned to face Merlin, refusing to meet his questioning gaze. "I- I turned on everyone in Camelot. I teamed up with Morgause and attempted to overthrow the kingdom. It failed again and again, until one day... it didn't... Mordred impaled Arthur with a blade forged in a dragon's breath." She looked towards her brother who sat crouched by his father. His eyes possessed terror, shock, and confusion all at once. Arthur seemed frozen in place, unsure if his interference would be a hindrance or a help. Uther seemed shell shocked too, although much less so. The king had been aware of Merlin's magic. "From my time... Arthur hadn't quite died, but based on what you've said... I presume..."

Kyulds' expression darkened further and his brow furrowed in anger and grief. "I was taking him to the Isle of the Blessed!! I was taking him someplace where I could heal him!! But because of you..." Excalibur shook in his hand along with his voice. "You wasted precious moments our time!" The magnitude of his voice echoed through the hall and shook even more dust loose from the already unstable ceiling. "He died in my arms!" Kyulds turned his mismatched eyes to look at the prince. "I don't know what destiny was playing at, making me practically grow up with and shape a man into a great king just so he could be slaughtered like an animal! And all the while Kilgharrah assured me that everything worked out the way it was supposed to, 'I didn't fail my destiny,' but after a while I no longer cared about that! What mattered was that destiny failed me!!"

"Merlin-"

"Don't call me that!!" he paused. "Merlin died along with Arthur," he said coldly. "Or at least... he started to."

"What do you mean?" Merlin asked. Morgana looked over at him and saw there were tears welling in the boy's eyes. He was hurting in a way that should have been impossible, feeling grief for the death of a prince who was alive and well only feet behind him. 

"First it was Arthur, then it was Gwaine, then it was Gaius, then mother, then the rest of the knights, then Gwen, and years and years later, after I thought I couldn't get any more lost and purposeless than I already was... One day I called out for Kilgharrah... and... and he never came." He hung his head. "I was alone, burdened by destiny to stay alive in my own living purgatory, long enough for the once and future king to rise once more, when Albion's need is greatest." His voice broke, as he tried to collect himself and remain calm. He spoke through his tears. "And I lived and waited through it all. War, plague, civil unrest... death after death after death after death!!" He turned and pounded his fists against the stone wall. "After a while I knew I couldn't do it anymore... couldn't do it alone." A slight smile grazed his lips at the seemingly happy memory. "I... I got married. I... I had a son... a beautiful baby boy. He became my everything... he became my new purpose, my new destiny... The gentlest spirit... the kindest heart and poetry, my God! The poetry that he delivered was like nothing I'd ever heard in my thousands of years on this Earth!" Kyulds turned back to look at his audience, all of whom were enthralled by his story. He wiped his eyes and took a seat on the window sill, preparing himself to continue. "There was a great unrest in Europe, still Arthur did not rise, this great unrest turned into a Great War, still Arthur did not rise... My only son, drafted at the age of eighteen to fight in a war he knew nothing about, armed with his poetry and his good heart, but in a war as brutal at this... it wasn't enough... I followed him out there. I had to. I had to make sure he was safe."

"What is his name?" Merlin interrupted. "Your- our son, what is his name?"

"Will" 

"After-?"

"Yes."

"Wha- what happened?" Merlin asked, dreading the answer. 

"I followed him to the front lines. I tried to remain undetected... but he saw me, accused me of being overprotective and not trusting him enough to take care of himself. It turned into an argument." He looked up at the ceiling, as if staring at someone who wasn't there. "All I wanted was for someone I loved to be safe, for someone I loved to live a full happy life with a happy ending! Later that night, our camp was attacked. I was hit." He gulped. "A bullet hit me right in the eye." He gestured to the darkened area around his one brilliant gold eye. "I... I played dead so as not to cause suspicion, but Will..." He shook his head at the memory. "He came back for me." He closed his eyes. "And it got him shot. His compassion and his love got him killed." He took a deep breath in, trying once more to collect his emotions. "And that's when I knew... no more... no more."

<<o>>

Merlin was running through a decaying landscape. He tripped over blackened crumbling stumps that decorated the area, former trees that were felled by the destruction of war. Over his shoulders, he carried the limp body of a young man who wore the same dingy brown uniform stained with blood. 

"I've got you Will, just... hang on, please hang on!"

"Father..."

Merlin looked wildly around, scanning the landscape for the familiar landmark, the beautiful tall obelisk that stood on the Isle of the Blessed. He ran towards it. 

"I see it Will! We're almost there! I promise you-"

"Father, stop!"

Merlin didn't stop. He continued to push on through the uneven terrain, picking up the pace as the Obelisk became closer and closer. The clearer it became, the more Merlin could see how the war had damaged it. The point of the once magnificent monument lay shattered beside it on the ground. The castle surrounding it, which had already been in ruins when Merlin was young, was reduced to piles of pebbles and ash. 

"We're here, Will, we're here!"

"Father, what are you-" the boy couldn't finish his sentence, crying out in pain as his father lowered him to the ground. 

"I'm sorry, son, I'm so sorry... this is all my fault... all my fault..."

Will looked down at his wound, a stain in his chest that grew wider and darker at an alarming pace. He looked away, tears welling up in his eyes. "Father... I'm a coward."

"Why would you say that? Don't ever say that!"

"No, it's true. I'm a coward."

"No-"

"I'm afraid, father... I don't want to die."

"You're not going to die!" Merlin said resolutely. "Not on my watch! Do you understand me!?"

"Father, I-"

"You're not going to die!"

Will only responded with a few muffled whimpers. 

"You're not going to die," Merlin said again in a more hushed tone. "I can save you. We just need to get to that island." He pointed to the decaying Obelisk. 

"What's that island got to do with a bullet through my chest?"

"I've already tried to heal you with my own magic, but I'm afraid in my hurry I made it worse. I was always terrible at healing magic." He heaved under his son's shoulders, trying, in vain, to move him just the little bit further they needed to go.

"No! Stop! Please!! Stop!" He yelled and he yelled until Merlin could' no longer bear to carry him. A pitiful sound, guttural, heart wrenching screams that traveled far in the endless decay of land that lay before them.

His heart broke at the desperate sound of his son's cracked and hoarse tone. "W- we have to. He have to get you to the Isle."

"What are you talking about?" His words were slurred. 

"Magic. It's... it's real. It can save you."

"I don't believe you."

Merlin bit down hard on his lip, fearing that if his mouth was aloud to open he would let out a piercing cry of agony that would desecrate all of Europe. "Well... it doesn't matter now..."

"Father..."

"I'm right here."

"Don't leave me."

"I'm not going to."

"Where's mother?"

"She's safe. You saved her. You saved the world."

"I did?"

Merlin smiled through cascading tears. "When the world needed brave men like you to help defend it, you didn't back down, you were proud to defend your country."

"But I failed."

"No."

"Am I dying?"

Merlin didn't answer, choosing instead to pull his son closer. 

"Father, I'm still afraid. I don't want to die and I'm cowardly for it."

"It's okay to be afraid."

"You can't tell mum. You can't tell mum I was a coward."

"If I told her you were a coward I would be lying." Merlin held Will's bloodless cheeks between his hands. "I love you, and that will never stop."

Will smiled. "I love you too."

The smiled faded.

Silence. A slight wind swirled the loosened dirt at their feet into beautiful spirals. Silence. 

"Will?" Nothing. "Will?" Nothing. "My boy, my beautiful boy!" Merlin wrapped his arms around the lifeless body of his son, willing him to take another breath. "Will!!!" He wept for the loss of the bright innocent eyed young boy who grew up in his arms, now laid to rest in the same place. "Will!!!" He screamed into the sun tanned air, a sound that sent a shock wave rippling through the landscape, toppling any nearby burnt out trees, as his eyes burned gold. 

He turned his attention toward the lake, gently setting Will down by the shore and wading violently into the water. 

"Freya!! Freya, where are you, answer me!!"

The ripples that fled in his wake became more pronounced and unnatural, swelling around a chosen spot in front of him. The lady of the lake began to emerge from the water, drops of discolored liquid falling into place around her. Her lake was contaminated by war, with blood and bodies decorating the shore. 

"I am here, Merlin," she said sadly. 

"Freya..." In his grief, he could only manage her name. He stumbled forward into the water. Freya was quick. She reached out and caught him before he could fall below the surface. She lowered him down and held him in her arms, allowing the water to envelope his legs and lower torso. He held onto her tightly, not having the strength to let go. "He... he's gone... again..."

"Again?"

"I'm a curse, a plague. Is it really my destiny to sit around and watch as everyone I love falls dead around me? I can't do it anymore! I can't do it."

"What are you saying?"

"I want to join them, Freya. I want the sweet release of death to carry me away to Avalon where... where no one will be counting on me anymore. I need to be free from this..."

"Merlin," Freya said, pity and sorrow in her tone. "Although it may seem bleak, destiny has you on the right path-"

"I don't care about destiny anymore!!" His magic swelled around him, following his burst of anger. 

"Merlin!"   

"I wish to die! I wish to die and be free from it all!"

"Merlin, you can't."

"I could... if I had a blade forged in a dragon's breath."

Freya shook her head. "Merlin, no. It won't work. It is destiny's word to keep you alive until Arthur returns."

Merlin shoved himself away from Freya, leaving ripples in his wake as he crawled backwards out of the lake. "Arthur... he... he's never coming back!"

"Merlin, don't say that!" Freya yelled desperately. "No matter what happens you can't lose your sense of hope. It... it's- Merlin, please!" She reached out and attempted to grab Merlin's arm as he tried to crawl farther and farther away. "Hope is who you are!"

They continued to struggle, Merlin doing his best to drag himself out of the water, out of Freya's grasp. "That's sick! That's hurtful! Hope has never been who I am! It's a sickness!" 

"Hope is what differentiated you from Morgana."

"No!" With one final tug, Merlin freed himself from Freya's outstretched arms, rolling his body onto the rocky shore. His uniform soaked with the bloodied water. "Hope..." he panted. "Is not something you can be, Freya... it's something you have." The pair looked into each others eyes, both imploring the other to understand their mind. "And... and I don't have it anymore."

Freya closed her eyes, hiding the build up of sorrow. "Then you've lost yourself." She paused. "And I am gravely sorry for it."

"Me too." Merlin stood and turned to look at the ashen body of his son. "What would you do, Freya? If it was your son, what would you do?" He turned back to look at her. "If it was you friend, what would you do?"

"I would be strong..." she almost couldn't say it. "I would be strong in the knowledge that one day, I would see him again in a world we all dream of."

Merlin laughed. "A world we all dream of?!?! Look around you! Arthur was supposed to rise when Albion's need was greatest! How many men have died in the wake of this war?! How many more families are going to be destroyed and habitats ruined before destiny decides it's time to send back our king?!"

Freya had no answer.

"Exactly," Merlin scoffed at her silence. "No... no more... I'm done. Destiny can find a new pawn to destroy." His eyes searched the water behind the girl in the lake, no longer full of love and heartbreak, but full of anger and determination. "So... give me Excalibur. She will take a final life."

Freya backed away. "Merlin... even if I do give you Excalibur... it won't work. If destiny wishes to keep you in her game-"

"I gave you the sword to protect, Freya!" His voice was rough and commanding, almost like he was calling Kilgharrah. "I have a right to take it back!"

Fresh tears stung her eyes as Freya remained still in the water. "Merlin, it breaks my heart to see you this way-"

"It breaks your heart?!" He rushed back into the lake and grabbed her shoulders, holding them tight in his grief. "My son is dead!"

"Merlin, I know!"

"No!"

"I lost my entire family when I was a girl, I know how you feel!"

"No you don't. Freya! You don't!" He let her go and sank, knee deep, into the water. "First, Destiny kills Will so Arthur won't find out about my magic too soon, then I lose you because density knew that if you remained unharmed, I would be happy running away from Camelot and starting a life with you, then destiny killed my father so I could inherit his power just in time to save the kingdom, and then..." He buried his head into her skirt, like a tentative child hiding from a stranger. "Then... it's all been for this better future, right? This knew world I'll build with Arthur? But, no... Arthur dies in my arms too. And I'm left with nothing. And now destiny's killed my son, the happiness I tried to create as I waited in her game for my turn to come again."

Freya put a comforting hand on his damp hair. 

"I'm done..." he sighed. "After all these years... it's been long enough. I'm done."

<<o>>  

"Did she give it to you?" Morgana asked solemnly, remembering how Freya had given her the very same sword only hours ago.

"She did. She felt sorry for me." His singular golden eye glistened in the darkness. "And I should've listened to her. I should never have been so weak. It didn't work, and now..." He stood, revealing in full the nightmarish state he was in and the gaping hole in his chest where Excalibur left its mark. "Now look what I have become!"

"You..." Morgana began. "You're trapped."

"In a way..." 

"Why do you call yourself Kyulds?" Merlin asked.

Kyulds turned menacingly to look at his former self. "Because, if you were to call me Merlin or even Emrys it would be a lie."

"I don't understand."

"I was once told that I was magic itself. I didn't realize until I attempted to take my own life how true that was. Merlin was willing to die that day. So he did." He put a hand over the wound in his chest and looked at his younger form. "No matter what people call you, you are Emrys: a warlock born with magic so powerful you're practically made of it, he is the embodiment of magic." He crouched down in front of the boy. "But magic cannot be killed!" he laughed. "How foolish of me to think that I could kill it! No... no matter how hard I tried, the only part of Emrys that was able to be vanquished was his humanity." He rose from his position and stalked to the open window. "So in a way, Emrys did die that day. He was fractured in two, leaving behind me. His magic and his bitterness." He smiled wickedly. "I'm not really a person, am I? I can drift between times, witness mistakes... my own purgatory."

"I'm... I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry for what you went through," Morgana tried tentatively. "Maybe we can help you-"

"No one can help me!" Kyulds shouted. "The only thing that will give me peace is if he dies!" He pointed an accusing finger at the young warlock. "It wasn't possible in my time, but here... here he is weak. His grasp on his magic is not yet strong enough to prevent a smilier botched death."

"You want him dead now so he doesn't become you in the future?!" Morgana gasped. 

"Better to die young than to suffer eternal life of sorrow!" 

"But why?! Why employ me to do it?"

"I've learned the hard way what happens when I attempt to kill myself."

A strange silence filled the hall as everyone waited to see what would happen next. Merlin and Morgana made eye contact, both asking the other what they should do. In this time, they had faced a slew of magical creatures together, but this must have been their most hopeless challenge yet.

"What... what are you going to do know?" Morgana asked weakly. 

Kyulds shook his head and sighed. "Well... I'll do what I always do... Kill you, Morgana, and start again." 

Morgana's entire body tensed as he reached for Excalibur...

Chapter Text

Morgana's entire body tensed as Kyulds reached for Excalibur. She closed her eyes, not content with her death, but unable to think of a reasonable way of escape. Her only hope was that after her death and Kyulds reset everything to try again, her new self would be able to find away to break this cruel cycle. She wondered how many other versions of herself had had this exact thought before Kyulds drove Excalibur through their hearts. 

However, before she could feel an impaling sensation, she heard a violent shout coming from in front of her. She opened her eyes to investigate what could possibly be keeping her from death. 

"Morgana! Take Merlin and the king and get out of here!!" Her brother was in front of her, his own blade straining under the force of Excalibur's shadowy wielder. He gritted his teeth as he mustered his remaining strength. "Morgana! Run!!"

Morgana didn't need him to say it again. She grabbed Merlin's arm and began to pull him in the only direction of escape, the nearby open window. They were trapped in a dead end, the hall they had come down completely barricaded by jagged chunks of stone and ceiling. She didn't bother attempting to drag Uther along as well, he would only slow them down. 

"Morgana, how do we get down?" Merlin gasped as he stared at the courtyard far below. Darkness had set in. The ground could only be made out by watching the reflections of lamp light bouncing off the rain soaked cobblestones. Thunder rumbled beyond the citadel walls and flashes of bright lightning accompanied the blasts. 

"We're going to have to jump!" Morgana called over the noise. She stepped carefully over the sill and placed herself precariously on a thin slippery ledge. She reached out her hand to Merlin, helping the injured boy balance beside her. 

"Jump? Are you insane!?"

The clanging of metal could be heard from inside where Arthur still stood his ground. He swiped his sword towards Kyulds who used Excalibur to block, once, twice. 

"Why won't you fight back?!" Arthur growled. "What kind of game are you playing?!"

Kyulds continued to defend himself in silence, attempting to get past the fierce Pendragon to no avail. 

"Fight me! Why won't you use magic!" Arthur shouted at him, growing more and more frustrated and confused at his opponents seemingly lack of gritted enthusiasm in their fight.

"Let me pass, Arthur. This is not your fight."

"No!" Arthur swiped again, landing a nasty blow along the side of Kyulds face. However, the man's face was already battered and bloodied by years of anguish that the new scratch was unnoticeable. 

"I will not fight you, Arthur. I do not have it in me," he said sadly. "You're only delaying the inevitable."

Morgana turned her attention back to the precarious situation she found herself in, her feet dangling off the edge of rain slicked stone. "I know a spell that might be able to help us!" she shouted to Merlin. 

"Alright then!" He held on tight to her arm. "Then do it!"

She shook her head. "No, I can't! I don't have complete control over my magic and if I mess it up then we're going to fall!"

"Then what is it?! What's the spell?!"

"It's, befón et betreppan mé! Have you got that?!"

"Befón et betreppan mé," Merlin repeated. "Befón et betreppan mé." His eyes burned gold.  

Morgana knew this was their chance. "Jump!" Together Morgana and Merlin hurled themselves away from the window and towards the courtyard below. Morgana prayed that the spell had been enough. Kyuld's shouts from above her rapidly faded into the night. 

"You will fail, Morgana!" he said. "Give up now! Continuing to fight will only make it more painful!" 

Their descent slowed, their flailing bodies calming as even the rain seemed to freeze around them. Their faces were inches from the cobblestones. Morgana sighed in relief. Merlin had pulled it off. The calm air and floating sensation was gone as soon as it arrived. Merlin and Morgana tumbled down the short distance left between them and the ground, receiving only minimal scrapes and bruises. 

"You alright?" Morgana asked. 

"Yeah," Merlin said hoarsely. She helped him up, wearily watching as he staggered to his feet. 

"Are you sure?"

"Well," Merlin looked down at his wound. "I've still got this gaping hole in my chest," he said matter a factly, swaying where he stood. "But other than that..."

Morgana put both hands on his shoulders to steady him. "And I wish we could stop to treat it, but I'm afraid we don't have time. Kyulds will brush Arthur away in a matter of seconds! I'm surprised he hasn't done it already."

Both tensed at the sight of a group of knights running in unison near them. They shuffled back into the shadows and continued their discussion, making their way discretely back into the citadel. 

"You're right. The only reason Arthur has been able to hold him off for this long is because... he's me. I wouldn't use magic to hurt Arthur. Never."

"Then we've got to think of something quick, before we run out of time!"

"We need to find a way to kill him... or at least get rid of him."

An idea struck Morgana. "A few weeks ago, the Great Dragon warned me of the danger of Kyulds. Perhaps he would know something that would help."

Merlin shook his head as his eyes hardened. "The last time I went down there to see Kilgharrah, the tunnel had caved in. Looking back, it was probably Kyulds who caved it in in the first place so he wouldn't be able to warn me."

Morgana bit her lip. "But it's our only option."

"How are we going to clear the rocks?"

Morgana smiled slightly. "Emrys and a high priestess? I think we can muster up the strength to clear some boulders."

Merlin grimaced. "A high priestess who's lost control of her magic and an Emrys who's young and inexperienced...? That makes it a little different..."

"We won't know if we don't try."

<<o>>

Their pace was slow as Morgana and Merlin made their way down the many stretches of dimly lit corridors, occasionally ducking behind pillars and rushing into hidden closets to avoid the watchful eyes of the patrolling knights. There weren't too many patrols, as most of the men were busy trying to clear the hallway to the kings chambers. Both Merlin and Morgana kept their eyes peeled, terrified that Kyulds might seep out of the shadowy patches of hallway at any moment.

"This isn't right..." Merlin muttered under his breath. 

"What?" The citadel shook with the sound of the distant thunder. 

Merlin stopped and look back in the direction they'd come. He gulped. "We're not alone."

Morgana followed Merlin's gaze, but saw nothing. She tugged on his arm. "Come on, we have to keep going," she urged, not wanting to believe that Kyulds had already caught up with them. 

Merlin indulged her and let her lead him down another hall and down a few flights of stairs. 

"Come on, we're almost there..."

They were now passing through a part of the castle that was decaying with lack of use. Cobwebs and dust stretched across the crumbling pillars and tombs of royals who were long gone. 

"Stop!" Merlin said suddenly, thrusting out his hand to stop Morgana from pressing forward. 

"What, what is it?!" Morgana said, slightly frustrated. "We need to keep moving, Kyulds could be on our trail and... and..."

"He already is..." Merlin pointed in the direction they were headed, in the direction of the darkened archway that lead to Kilgharrah's cave. "He's there."

Morgana peered into the seemingly empty doorway. Her breathing quickened as her body began to shake. She grabbed at Merlin's arm to steady herself. She didn't know what they would do if Merlin was right and Kyulds really was waiting in front of them. How were they supposed to get past a being that seemed to be pure magic, anger, and hate?

"What do we do?" she whispered. "Are you sure?"

Merlin nodded. "I can feel him... I can feel... me..."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know exactly. There's some sort of pull..."

The pair took a few tentative steps back. "I know I've already said it... but I'll say it again..."

"What do we do?" Merlin finished for her. 

Kyulds' figure began to emerge slowly from the archway, accompanied by the hissing sound of Excalibur dragging on the stone behind him. Kyulds breathed in and exhaled with a large sigh. 

"Morgana... Morgana..." he laughed dryly. "Did you really think you could run from me?" He came closer, his stance and demeanor communicating his unhinged state. "I've been here before, remember? This is far from my first attempt. And it is not my first time having to kill... you."

Merlin stepped in front of Morgana. "Stay away from her."

Something flashed beneath Kyulds' mismatched eyes. Could it possibly be fear? Morgana wondered. It was gone as soon as it appeared. Kyulds brought the sword forward and held it aloft, but it was far from a steady fighting stance. Excalibur swayed in his hand. 

Merlin took another step forward. "I said, stay away," he said, doing his best to sound intimidating, but his voice betrayed him. 

Kyulds smiled, but didn't stand down. "I know, more than anyone, what you are capable of, Merlin. I suggest you stay away."

"Why should I?!" Merlin yelled. "You've already admitted you can't kill me! Why should I be afraid of you?!"

Kyulds' smiled faltered. "I may not be able to kill you myself, but I can inflict pain beyond what you could possibly comprehend!"

Merlin didn't budge, standing his ground protectively in front of Morgana. "This has to end! You... you have gone too far!

"You're wrong," Kyulds said coldly. "I haven't gone far enough." Kyulds spread his fingers as white lightning began to crackle between them and along his palms. "I'm giving you a final warning." He paused and met Merlin's hard determined gaze. "But what did I expect?" he said, a melancholy tone in his voice. "I never new when to give up." 

Merlin held out his own hands, ready to defend himself in any way that he could. Morgana could sense his fear and apprehension as he prepared to fight an older more powerful version of himself. Kyulds and Merlin stared at each other, both daring the other to make the first move. Kyulds' lightning continued to crackle along his hands and up his arms, illuminating Excalibur with brilliant flashes of heat and light. Merlin's eyes shimmered from blue to gold.

All Morgana could do was watch. Watch as Kyulds' free hand shot out with speed and precision. Watch as his lightning arched through the room, bringing broad daylight to the dark chamber. Watch as Merlin made his own movement, running forward towards the frightening blast, his eyes bristling with power and light. He reached out and grabbed Kyulds' storm bearing hands with his own. There was a blinding flash of golden white light. Morgana ducked and shielded her eyes with her hands. A powerful ringing filled her ears. She couldn't see, she couldn't hear. She called out to her friend, but got no response, not even able to hear her own terrified shouting. 

"Merlin!" Her own voice was a distant haze. "Merlin!" She opened here eyes only to find that the chamber was consumed by darkness once more. "Merlin!" she called again, looking frantically in the direction she had last seen him. The world was spinning. She tried to stand, but her legs were too shaky to support her own weight. "Merlin?" She crashed back into the floor and felt her leg connect with something sharp. She cried out and shied away from the source of the pain. She squinted, trying to get a better look. It was a sword, a silver blade with beautiful gold markings down the center. Could it be? She reached out, but before retrieving it she scanned the area, looking for the person who was wielding it only moments ago.

"Morgana!" She heard his voice echoing from the side, but in her haziness she couldn't tell if it was her enemy or her friend. 

"Merlin?" Her ears were still ringing. 

"It's me! It's me!" 

Her vision began to improve as the face of Merlin began to appear above her. He smiled. 

"Thank goodness! I thought I killed you."

Morgana sat up, cautiously. "Are you alright?"

"I... I think so..." Merlin said. "A little confused, but..." He looked down at his chest. "No worse off than I was before..." he held a hand to his head and squinted at the ground.

"Are you sure?"

"Uhh... yeah... yeah... I think..." 

"What happened?"

"I don't know."

"Where's Kyulds?"

"I... I don't know."

"Is he dead?"

"I don't know!" Merlin shouted. He looked towards the archway where Kyulds had emerged from only moments ago. "Come on, I think the blast cleared the rocks that were in our way." he helped her to her feet and they both sprinted as fast as they could towards Kilgharrah's cavern.

Together, they shoved the remaining sharp rocks and boulders from their path and continued down into the depths of the citadel. 

"Kilgharrah!" Merlin called out frantically. They had reached the place where Morgana remembered speaking to the Great Dragon, but it had changed drastically. The cavern, which used to be illuminated by by a faint blue light, was now pitch black, the few places that allowed sunlight to seep through completely concealed by debris. "Bærnam," Merlin said forcefully. A flame appeared in his balled fist and he held it aloft like a torch. "Kilgharrah!"

A rumbling echoed from somewhere below the platform, rocks and boulders scattered as something struggled to break through. 

"Kilgharrah!" Merlin said more excitedly. 

The dragon groaned. "Young Warlock," he said weakly. "To what do I owe this pleasure?" He seemed exhausted, his usual bright scales covered by fragments of dirt and dried blood. 

"Something's happened!"

"Evidently." His golden eyes spotted Morgana, who remained on the stone ledge. "Has the witch finally come to her senses?"

Morgana shuffled, uncomfortably. "I... I... yes..." she said shamefully. 

Merlin looked between them. "Kilgharrah, we need to know how to kill Kyulds." 

The dragon narrowed his eyes. "I presume you have uncovered his true identity?"

"Yes..." Merlin began. "Yes and no. I know he's me, or, some version of me..." he trailed off. 

"We know that he is what Merlin becomes in the future."

"Yeah." Merlin scratched the back of his head, refusing to make eye contact with Morgana or Kilgharrah. "We know that, but I just don't understand..."

Kilgharrah nodded. "Kyulds is an extremely dangerous enemy. I warned you to stay away from him, but it seems the situation has escalated beyond anyone's control."

"Kyulds is trying to kill me so he can reset time again." Morgana said. "He's been trying to use me to kill Merlin more than just this one time."

"Interesting..." Kilgharrah muttered. "And he needs to kill you in order to reset the timeline, in order to try again?"

Morgana nodded. "I believe so. I don't belong here. I'm time's anomaly. It makes sense if getting rid of me would set things right."

"Kilgharrah, I just don't understand!" Merlin interrupted. "How could Kyulds be me?!"

Kilgharrah looked at the young warlock and sighed. "I understand how you must feel-"

"No, how could you possibly understand?!" He brought a hand to his forehead and took a few stumbling steps back. "I think I've only just realized..."

"Merlin," Morgana tried, "I know it's shocking, but-"

"Shocking?! No. Finding out that you were from the future and here to kill me, was shocking. This... this is..."

"But Merlin, Kyulds is not you. Not quite," the dragon said.

Merlin furrowed his brow. 

"Kyulds is only a part of you. He is your fear, your anger, your sadness, and your magic. He is not whole without the rest."

"I don't understand."

"In the future, Emrys, when your heart became too full of anguish and despair, you attempted to take your own life. Unfortunately, this attempt was thwarted by destiny, but it wasn't a perfect job. You we split in two, ripped into fragmented pieces. As Emrys, you are magic itself, but you are also more than that. As well as magic there is a person inside you. A person that is lost to Kyulds. He bears none of your kindness, none of your love. He brings only your pain."

"But it's still my pain, it's still me."

Kilgharrah nodded slowly. "Yes, young warlock, I'm afraid so."

Merlin's expression darkened. "How do we kill him?"

"It cannot be done."

Merlin's eyes narrowed. "No! There has to be a way. There has to be a way to stop him!"

"If we don't, he will continue to try to kill Merlin again and again until he succeeds!" Morgana added. 

Kilgharrah looked around the cavern, as if the monster in question was hiding behind one of the many shadows cast by Merlin's torched hand. "Where is Kyulds?"

Merlin and Morgana looked at each other worriedly. "We... we don't know," Morgana said.  

"How could that be possible?"

"It was... it was Merlin actually. On our way down here Kyulds confronted us, but Merlin was able to fight him off."

Merlin massaged the back of his neck. "Well, actually... I didn't fight him off."

"What?"

"I just kind of... I don't know..." He looked to the dragon. "I just touched him and... there was an explosion of some sorts."

Kilgharrah seemed unfazed. "That reaction does not surprise me. You posses the part of Kyulds that makes him incomplete. The only problem is, there's already something filling that space. You are not broken."

"And?"

"And... think of two magnets. If pushed together at the wrong side-"

"They propel each other."

"Indeed."

"But did this contact hurt Kyulds?"

Kilgharrah shifted his position. "I doubt it. It most likely just stunned him."

Merlin turned to Morgana. "Do you think we could use this to our advantage? At least until we find a way to get rid of him for good, I can keep him away from you and-"

"No, young warlock, you mustn't risk doing that again!" Kilgharrah said, sternly. 

"Why on Earth not? It saved Morgana's life!"

"Yes, for now, but it was extremely dangerous. Knowledge on this subject is few and far between. It isn't possible to know what might happen if you try that too many times. It could break you, just as Kyulds is already broken."

"But you don't know that for sure..."

"I know enough to advise you strongly against it. I'm surprised it didn't affect you this time."

Merlin shrugged. "It just felt strange."

"Kilgharrah's right," Morgana stepped in. "If I die, yes, Kyulds will have another chance, but so will we. But if something happens to you..."

"The witch speaks the truth, young warlock."

Morgana scowled at Kilgharrah, offended by the name. 

Merlin clasped both hands to his templed, the weight and suddenness of the situation obviously taking its tole. "I'm sorry this is just..."

Morgana reached out and put a hand on his arm. "It's okay, Merlin. I understand what a total shock this must be for you."

"Only hours ago I was trapped in a wardrobe and I thought the worst of my problems was Morgause running me through with Excalibur."

Morgana cringed at the memory, remembering how she had driven the sword through her sister's heart. It wasn't the Morgause she knew, she thought, or was it? Maybe it was Morgana who had changed. "I know you must be overwhelmed right now, a lot has happened."

"You've understated it."

"But we've got to muster up what it takes to destroy Kyulds."

"I know, I'm sorry." He pushed away hair that was melted to his forehead with sweat. He nodded to Morgana. "I'm okay." 

"You don't have to apologize."

They both turned back to Kilgharrah. He narrowed his eyes. "If you're looking to me to give you a solution to this mess..." He sighed. "I'm afraid I don't know how to help you."

Merlin bit his lip. "Come on, you can't be serious. You've got to know something that can help us!"

"I... I'm sorry, young warlock. For once, I am at a loss for what to tell you." 

Merlin began to pace, occasionally leaning up against the stone wall, trying to catch his breath. He clutched at his chest, obviously still dealing with the pain from his wound. He brought his fist into the wall with all the force of frustration his already weakened muscles could muster. 

Morgana hadn't moved. A thought was brewing in her mind. She looked up and met the Great Dragon's golden gaze. "Kilgharrah... if Kyulds is only half of Emrys... where's the other part?"

"What do you mean?"

"If Emrys is Merlin and Kyulds put together, and Kyulds is only Kyulds..."

This perked Merlin's attention. "The missing piece of him has to be somewhere!" Merlin exclaimed. 

"That's exactly what I was thinking... but there's something else..." Now she began to pace. "When I went to visit the woman in the lake and she gave me Excalibur and the box, she told me that she was going to help me, but not in the way I thought she was going to help me. I didn't understand before, but I think I do now."

"So, you did speak to Freya?" Merlin's voice was small and fragile. 

Morgana nodded. "She gave me the box that I gave to Kyulds, the one with the strawberry in it. I thought she was helping me by giving me the sword, but that wasn't it. It was the box, that strawberry, that was really the help I needed." She locked eyes with Merlin. "Seeing that fruit seemed to have an affect on Kyulds, it made him change back into his real form. Is there any significance to strawberries?"

Merlin nodded slightly, losing the eye contact. However, he did not give any further answer, and based on the defeated look in his sagging shoulders, she didn't think pressing him would be a good idea. 

Morgana looked back to Kilgharrah. "If I'm not mistaken, you said that Kyulds was comprised of only magic, fear, bitterness, and anger... but seeing the strawberry, something from Merlin's past..."

Merlin nodded in agreement. "I could see it in his eyes. It affected him in a way that shouldn't have been possible if he was, in that moment, only hate."

Kilgharrah narrowed his eyes. "What are you suggesting?"

"I think... I think the missing part of Kyulds isn't missing after all." Morgana's fists tightened as determination closed in around her. "I think we owe another visit to the Lady of the Lake."

Chapter Text

Their footsteps echoed ominously around the empty passageway as they ascended the stairs from Kilgharrah's lair. They kept glancing over their shoulder and into the shadows, worried the silence was too quiet to be safe, the corridors too empty for Kyulds not to be lurking around every corner. Although Merlin and Morgana had discussed it briefly, they still weren't sure what state Kyulds was left in after Merlin had attacked him. Maybe he was injured, maybe he wasn't. 

They rounded a corner and found themselves in the same archaic room where Kyulds had tried to block their path. The bright clean glint of Excalibur shone from the floor and Morgana's heart nearly burst through her chest at the sight of it. She had spotted the sword after the explosion, why hadn't she thought to grab it? She hurried over and grabbed the hilt. If kyulds wasn't strong enough to come back and retrieve such a valuable weapon... maybe Kilgharrah was wrong and he had been wounded by the blast.   

Merlin swayed without her support, feeling the full weight of his injuries. "Morgana-" 

She ran back to his side and handed him the blade to use as a makeshift crutch. He nodded his thanks and indicated that they should keep going.

"We've got to get to the stables... get horses..."

Morgana looked Merlin over, estimating his strength, and cringed. "Maybe... maybe you should wait here."

"No, no way! I'm not letting you go alone unprotected." This is what she thought he'd say. 

"Your life is what he's after. If you die..."

"You're not going alone."  

Morgana nodded, but still stole a few quick glances at his gaping wound when she thought he wasn't looking. Eventually, she couldn't keep quiet any longer. "Here," she said, intercepting the boy and easing him down to sit against a wall. "We should at least patch you up."

He let out a sudden gasp of pain as the angle of his torso reached an uncomfortable position. "I'm not great at healing magic."

"I am. Had to be, given all the times I was roughed up from a battle with you or Arthur."

Merlin smiled through his pain. "You fought us?"

"Oh yes. It felt like hundreds of times."

"And you lost?"

"Sometimes. Sometimes not." She wracked her brain, trying to think of the right spell and willing her untamed power to bend to her will. "I'm going to do my best. This spell is simple so hopefully I can pull it off with the state my magic's in, but because it's simple it might take some time."

"We don't have time."

"Well, we can't go any longer with you in this state. You might need to fight him off again."

"If all I have to do is touch him-"

"No!" Morgana said sharply. "You have to promise me you won't do that again. You heard what Kilgharrah said."

"Kilgharrah says lots of things and if there's one thing these past few weeks has taught me, it's that sometimes when that dragon is unsure, his speculations are just that. Speculations."

"I think he's right about this. I have a feeling. If we face him again, it'll have to be with our magic alone."

"Fine," he huffed, although Morgana could tell that his agreement wasn't a sincere one. She didn't bother attempting to convince him. She knew it was no use and could only hope that it wouldn't come to that. 

She help up her hands in front of Merlin's chest and prepared to cast the spell. She felt her magic bubbling inside her. It felt unfamiliar and immature, wanting to burst out in small reactions instead of surrendering to balance and control. She took a deep breath and concentrated on channeling the spell. "Batian mín fréobródor, batian efenherenes..." Her eyes burned gold through her eyelids as energy coursed through her hands. A dim glow emanated from her palms as she traced them along the deep cut. Merlin winced. "I'm sorry," she said. 

He gritted his teeth. "It's alright. I'm fine." After a few moments he spoke again. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For... I don't know... from what I can infer about your future, or rather your past... I wish..." he trailed off. 

Morgana shook her head. "I deserve no sympathy."

"Of course you do."

"I'm not worthy of it, not if-" she stopped mid sentence. Merlin had grasped her shoulder tightly and dawned a serious look. 

"Don't ever think that."

"What?"

"Everyone is worthy of something, certainly of sympathy."

Again, Morgana shook her head, refusing to meet the boy's eyes. "No, you're wrong. Not when you've done what I've done. I don't think I'm worthy of any such thing."

"Nonsense."

"You don't know!" Tears stung her eyes, but they were quickly wiped away. "You don't know. Okay?"

Merlin looked away. "Okay." 

The seconds slowly drifted by as Morgana continued to dress Merlin's wound with the golden light from her palms. 

"Sympathy doesn't mean forgiveness, you know. It means understanding-"

"I said, you don't know!"

"People do things they come to regret."

"Regret isn't always enough."

Merlin closed his eyes and leaned back as Morgana continued to hover her hands over his wound. "There are things that I've done..." he shuddered, "thoughts that I've had, that I deeply regret."

Morgana didn't look up at him. "Be still."

"When the knights of Medhir were attacking us, I knew you were the one sourcing the spell..." He shoved his arm closer to the floor and brought his body forward. 

Morgana pushed him back. "I said, be still."

"I knew you were sourcing the spell and... and... no one was there to help me, Kilgharrah had already been buried. As it became more and more clear that you were the source, it crossed my mind that a way to save Camelot, the only way, was... to kill you."

Morgana froze. 

"I... I considered poisoning you." He took a breath. "Killing you."

"I know."

"W- what? How?"

She met his gaze. "From my time, you did poison me."

"I... I did?" He sounded heartbroken. 

Morgana nodded. "You did."

"Oh."

She looked away. "You did, and Morgause was the one to make the antidote that saved me. At first, I was hesitant to take over Camelot, I felt like it wasn't me. But when Morgause saved my life, saved me from... you, saved me from Camelot... what else was I supposed to do? I didn't know you had magic. I didn't know you were like me."

"I'm sorry."

Morgana shook her head. "It's useless for you to apologize. You didn't poison me this time. You didn't do it."

"But, I was meant to." 

"It's no matter." Morgana brushed a loose strand of hair away with a free hand. "It's still no excuse for what I did."

"I think it is."

"No, you don't understand what I did."

"You hurt people?" Merlin asked in a small voice.

Morgana didn't respond. She hoped her silence would be enough to convey the answer. 

Merlin sighed. "I think I do understand. Look what I've done."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, look what I've become."

"You mean Kyulds?"

"Yes. If you're holding yourself responsible for your past actions, should I be blamed for my future ones?"

Morgana paused. "I don't know."

"Me neither." 

Morgana pulled her hands away and inspected her handy work. "Is that any better?"

He stretched, flexing the spot where the deep gash used to be. "Yes."

"Good."

"Thanks."

She nodded in response. "Come on, we've waisted enough time already."

Merlin grabbed her arm. "Hang on."

"What?"

"I just wanted to say..." he stuttered, "I just wanted to say that... I forgive you for everything you did, or are going to do, and... and I hope you can forgive me too."

"I'm helping you aren't I?" She scooped up Excalibur and handed it to Merlin who still used it to support some of his weight. "I think my forgiveness is quite clear."

<<o>>

The pair continued through the citadel, moving much faster than before now that Merlin was in better condition. The pink hue of morning crept over the castle walls and the corridors were bursting with activity. Some servants scurried about their usual chores while other concerned knights and nobles puzzled over the collapsed ceiling that led up to the kings chambers and the current location of their king and the crown prince. Had they been injured or trapped by the collapse? Why did prince Arthur call down the the courtyard for help? Who had he been fighting? There was only one possible explanation for it all: sorcery. In this distracted state, no one paid much mind to Merlin and Morgana, who were both covered in dust and blood. 

"We'll take two horses from the stables. I doubt anyone will notice they're gone in this madness," Merlin said. They hurried over the damp cobblestones of the courtyard. 

"Merlin! Morgana!" Arthur was running towards them. He pushed passed nobles and knights alike who bombarded him with worried questions. Where have you been? Where is the king? Is someone attacking Camelot? A sorcerer? What should we do? He ignored them all, never taking his eyes off Morgana and his servant. "You're alright!!!" A smile spread across his face. 

"For now." Morgana glanced in the direction of the stables. "We need to get to the lake of Avalon."

"Wh-"

Merlin was already ahead of them, doing his best to hide his pain, still using Excalibur as a crutch. "We'll explain on the way."

Arthur's eyes pierced Merlin's back. His jaw tightened. 

Morgana watched him, cautiously. "Is everything alright?"

"Y- yes..." He turned his head, met Morgana's eyes, and in a hushed voice so that only she could hear, said: "I'm just... very confused and... I'm having a trouble determining who the enemy is." He closed his mouth tightly, trying to conceal his quivering lip. 

"It's okay, Arthur. Your... Merlin in your friend. He wouldn't do anything to hurt you."

"But he lied."

"So he wouldn't be burnt at the stake."

"I wouldn't of done that."

"Are you sure?"

"... No."

"Then how was Merlin supposed to be certain? Besides, if you hadn't done it then Uther would have certainly taken care of it. Speaking of the king..."

"I left him in his chambers. The knights still haven't fully escaped the rubble, but I managed to escape through the window after Kyulds fled."

Morgana grabbed his arm and began pulling him after Merlin. Arthur had reminded her that there was a terrifying magical thing who wanted them dead. Who knew how long it would take him to recover from Merlin's blast.

"Why do we need to get to the lake of Avalon? Not only that, I thought that lake was only a myth."

"It's not a myth and it's not too far from here. It lies within Camelot's borders." They reached Merlin who had already arrived at the stables and untied two of the three horses they needed. 

"I take it you two know where we're going then?"

Merlin hastily grabbed a saddle bag that was hooked on the wall and threw it over the back of his horse. "Yes."

Arthur made a move to fasten his own saddle, but Merlin had got to it first. "Alright then... I'll just... follow you then."

<<o>>

The previous night's rain had cleared into a misty morning. Beams from the low sun shone across the fog creating a serene beauty and a sense of calm. The stillness and the peace was unsettling, at least for Morgana. Her body still quivered with the stress from last night's events and the worry of what their quest might or might not accomplish. 

"We're almost there." Merlin pointed over a ridge. "It's just over there. You can already see the mountain through the trees."

Arthur frowned "There's a mountain? I thought is was a lake."  

"No, it is. There's just a mountain near it."

They spurred on their horses to cover the remaining distance between them and the lake. The mountain grew larger and larger through the trees until the foliage parted and the lake, shimmering with the morning sun, stretched out before them. The morning light bounced off the mountains trees. The entire atmosphere was much more welcoming than the last time Morgana had visited. 

They dismounted and approached the lake, Merlin moving in front. It would probably be the first time he got the chance to see Freya since she died. Based on the way Merlin had mourned that day Morgana stumbled into him in the forest, the girl had been more than a friend to him. 

He almost tripped over a rock in his haste. "Hello!" he called out, whipping his head around, scanning the water for any irregular motion. He turned to Morgana. "How did you speak to her? Did you use some sort of spell? A summoning?"

Morgana shook her head. "I tried using a spell, but there was no effect. She was the one to come to me."

Merlin stared anxiously back at the lake. "That's all? She just appeared to you?"

"Yes." 

His shoulders tensed. "Why wouldn't she come for me?" he mumbled, almost so Morgana couldn't hear. 

"Who is this 'Freya,' anyway?" 

"She's-" but Merlin was interrupted by the girl herself. The waters seemed to part as Freya emerged, beautiful as she always was. The gentle ripples settled at her fingertips, complimenting her weightlessness and flowing seamlessly into her gown. 

She smiled. "Morgana, you have returned. You upheld your promise and listened to your own mind."

"I'm just sorry it took me this long to realize... what I am, what I'd become."

"It's alright, Morgana." Her attention turned to Merlin. No words were said, an entire conversation seeming to flow only through their eyes. 

Arthur pushed foward. "Hello, Faya. I'm Prince Arthur of Camelot and we're here so-"

"No need to introduce yourself, Once and Future king." She rolled her eyes slightly at his arrogance. "And it's Freya, the lady of the lake."

"We've come for your help... again." Morgana decided to move the conversation along, anxious to be rid of the foul feigned who was surly on their trail at the very moment. She glanced at Merlin. "We've been trying to decipher what exactly is going on here and what exactly we can do about it. We know that Kyulds is from the future-"

"And we know that he's some severed version of me. He's only part of... Emrys." He cringed at the use of his druid name. 

Freya nodded. "You are correct."

"But how does that knowledge help us get closer to defeating him?" Merlin asked. "When I made contact with him, there was some sort of reaction that stunned him, but Kilgharrah said that I shouldn't try that again. He said it was dangerous."

"The great dragon is right. That was very dangerous."

"But that box..." Morgana's mind was racing with unanswered questions. "If Kyulds is only the anger, only the anguish of Merlin's future self-"

"Then how did the strawberry in that box manage to bring out a piece of him that should not have been possible," Freya finished for her. 

"It was almost like..."

"I saw my... his... his eyes. I saw it. Seeing that strawberry reminded him of you, of the time we spent together in that place. He was reminded of the love I have for you. But he wasn't just reminded, he felt it."

Freya smiled at him, her expression apologizing for much more than he could understand.

"Which means..." Morgana started, "that the broken pieces aren't gone forever. He can be fixed!"

"There is no way any of you could defeat Kyulds with mere force alone. He is too powerful. The only way to end this cycle and to save the destiny of Albion, is to remind him of his compassion and to make him whole again. Only then, might he stop his endless quest."

Morgana shuddered. "Might?"

"Even if we restore his compassion..." Merlin locked eyes with Morgana. "We both know my mind is capable of terrible things even when it hasn't been torn in half."

"Merlin," Morgana objected, but she couldn't think of anything else to say.

"You must trust that you, or rather Kyulds, will make the right decision. You must trust that this is all part of destiny's plan."

Morgana furrowed her brow. "How could letting Kyulds rampage through time possibly be a good thing?"

"How do we make him feel again? How do we make him like he was when he saw that strawberry?"

Freya's lip curled as her eyes flitted to Arthur. "We trick him."

"Trick him?"

Morgana looked between Freya and Arthur, trying to piece together what Freya was planning. "How could we possibly trick him?"

"We will need our prince's help for this."

Arthur tensed in a ready position. "What do I need to do?"

"Are you sure?" Merlin stepped towards his friend. "It's risky, can't me or Morgana do something? It just seems like a bad idea, throwing Arthur in front of Kyulds with nothing but a sword to defend himself. At least Morgana and I have magic to use against magic."

"But you said it yourself. Kyulds would never hurt Arthur. He didn't hurt him before," Morgana said.

Merlin shook his head. "Maybe not... but if he realizes Arthur is trying to trick him... we just don't know! Maybe he won't care because his goal is... is... is to reset everything anyway! It's too risky and Arthur is too important!"

"I would face Kyulds even if he was only threatening Morgana and Merlin. Morgana... no matter how much it pains me to admit it you are important to me and Merlin... I'd rather not have to find another servant. But he's not just threatening you, he's threatening Camelot and I will always lay down my life to protect my kingdom, no matter the risk." Arthur locked eyes with Merlin, conveying something more.

"Good," Freya said.

"What do I have to do?"

"It's simple really. You are going to pretend to be yourself."

Chapter Text

"It's simple really. You are going to pretend to be yourself."

"What?!" Merlin and Arthur said in unison, but Morgana had less confusion. 

She took a sharp breath. "I think I know what you mean to do."

"Well, I certainly don't," Arthur scoffed. 

Freya drifted closer to the shore. "The only person who could possibly bring Kyulds back together, bring the missing pieces back into his heart, is Arthur."

"But not the Arthur of now..." Morgana continued for her. 

"The Arthur of the future. An Arthur who has experienced everything with him. An Arthur who needs him to be there for his return."

Merlin shook his head. "How could he pull it off? How are we going to manufacture years of memories and experience?"

"I can help. It only has to be believable for a moment, enough to shock him. Then..."

"Then what?" Morgana asked apprehensively. 

Merlin ignored her question in favor of his own. "What if you just talked to him, Freya? The memory of you effected him before."

"No, Merlin. He already knows I'm here. He might expect me. In order for this to work, he has to be caught off guard." She turned to the prince. "You have to be convincing and you have to be confident."

Arthur nodded, although a slight twitch in his eyes gave away his uncertainty. 

"It's alright, Arthur." Morgana squeezed his arm. "You can do it." Merlin glared at her, but said nothing. 

"So... what do I need to know?"

Morgana's heartbeat quickened. "Well, lot's of things actually..." She met Freya's eyes. How much time did they have before Kyulds would be after them again? 

Arthur narrowed his eyes. "How far into the future are you from?"

"Well... not as far as Kyulds... but," she swallowed, "many... many years."

Arthur raised his eyebrows.

"It's fine, you don't need to know everything, just the larger points." Freya continued her explanation, touching on Morgana's disappearance after the knights of Medhir attacked, her return and eventual betrayal, the death of King Uther, the crowning of queen Guinevere, Mordred's alliance and betrayal, and finally the battle of Camlann. "You were wounded beyond hope. Merlin had no choice but to reveal his magic to you. At first you felt betrayed, but eventually you developed an understanding and a new found respect. However, this further bond wasn't enough to save you from Mordred's blade. You died in Merlin's arms. That would be the last thing you remember."

Arthur was silent, occasionally glancing at Merlin who refused to return his gaze. "What..." he tried, "what did I say to him? What did we say to each other?"

"Before you died?"

"No," Merlin said, turning his back to them. "This is too much." He hurried away from the lake and crouched beside a tree. He discarded Excalibur, hiding his face in his hands. They watched him go, no one making any attempt to stop him.

Arthur looked expectantly at Freya. 

"You said 'thank you.'"

"For what?"

"For what Merlin had done for you, ever since the day you met," Morgana answered. She hoped now, that Arthur truly believed Merlin was on his side. "He did more than just keep you alive, he made you into a better person, he transformed you from a prince to a king. Even a blind man could see that much."

Arthur looked over his shoulder, watching the younger boy as he sat forlornly at the base of a tree. Dazed, he shook his head slowly. "I'm sorry... it's all so strange... Part of me thinks I might wake up at any moment. It's easy to wrap your head around magic when you've seen it used all your life, but to be used to travel through time... It's just hard to..." He shook his head again and shifted his feet. "I've always had my doubts about magic being pure evil... in the back of my mind I did, but... I never expected someone so close..." his eyes widened as he gestured with his hands, "I can forgive Merlin for not telling me about his magic, but-"

Morgana glanced nervously at their surroundings. "Arthur, I don't think we have time for-"

"The situation is dire, I get it! But you have to give me a moment to fully comprehend what you're asking me to do."

"You need Merlin and Merlin needs you," Morgana said quickly. 

"You're two side of the same coin as far as destiny is concerned," Freya added. "One day The Once And Future King will rise once more and when he does, Emrys will be there to help him along the way."

Arthur's brow furrowed as he let out a sigh. "Umm..." it had only confused him further. "I don't-"

"The Arthur of the future matured with him, respects him, would do anything for Merlin..."

"Arthur, you need him," Morgana said, not quite meeting his gaze. "You need Merlin to be there for you when you rise again." 

"Your bond will become paramount. That's all you need to know."

He nodded. "Okay..."

"Just put everything else out of your mind and he'll believe it. Deep down, he want's to believe it."

"Okay."

Their conversation was interrupted by a sudden scream. Merlin was sprinting towards them, yelling and waving his arms. He was violently lifted off his feet and sent careening in the direction of the lake. His body tumbled through the air, eventually splashing into the murky water. 

"He's here," Morgana said. 

Arthur's eyes widened. 

"You can do it," she reassured him.

"Get down! Freya hissed, grabbing both of his arms and forcing him under the water where he couldn't be seen. 

Morgana was left alone on the rocky shore, scanning the darkness where the clearing met the trees. There it was, the glint of Excalibur waiting for her,  resting on the bark of a tree. In his panic, Merlin must have left it. Morgana's mouth was a desert, dry and cracking, contrary to the rest of her body which was flooded with panicked sweat. She had to force herself to breath, taking one shaky breath after another. She began to walk slowly and as calmly as possible in the direction of the sword. Maybe Kyulds hadn't noticed it there. If she made a mad dash for it, it might be given away. Where was he? Why was he waiting to attack? 

When she was only steps away, she couldn't take it any longer. Her entire body tensed. Adrenaline surged through her as she bolted to the sword. Stones and pebbled flew in her wake. Her hand gripped the handle, the glossy feel of the leather sliding across her finger tips. It wasn't a moment too soon. 

From the shadows of the woods came the battered solider, his one golden eye appearing before the rest of him. Morgana swung wildly, catching him off guard with a slice to his abdomen. He howled in rage, but the blow didn't slow him down. It only angered him. He came at Morgana again. There was no time for her to raise the blade, no time for her to run. His hands sprouted lightning claws and his eyes burst with fired pain and fury. Morgana screamed as the hot icy energy passed through her. She jolted backward, slamming into the trunk of a thick tree. 

"It was lovely of you to try, Morgana." He raised himself up from a crouched position, towering over her as he drew closer and closer, preparing to make his final move. "But, like always, you've failed me." He leaned back and chuckled slightly, although it was more of a groan. "And you've failed yourself." He reached for the blade. 

"Like always and forever. How long do you plan to spend, pining after a future that just isn't possible?"

His expression darkened further, every muscle in his face seeming to heighten its hatred for her.

"Morgana!!" They both turned to see Merlin, drenched from head to toe, fighting his way out of the lake. He held up his hands and gave Morgana a pointed look. Understanding instantly, she let her arm swing back. Kyulds realized her intention too late. The sword left her hand and arced over them both. Merlin caught it triumphantly. 

Kyulds turned back to Morgana and smiled. "It is no matter. In this time you are not a high priestess. I don't need it. The only thing that sword would have done is make your death more painful." He reached down and retrieved a stick from the ground. In his hand it began to elongate and morph, the point becoming as sharp as any sword. "So, Morgana, are you ready to try again?"

"Hey!!!" Merlin was shouting again and waving his arms wildly, trying to regain Kyulds' attention. 

Kyulds didn't even turn to look, instead, he pulled back his newly crafted weapon and drove it through Morgana's stomach. She gasped, shocked by the attack. She stared at the object protruding from her stomach, not sure what to think. The world began to swim around her, the splintering pain suddenly setting in. She moaned.

"Don't fret, Morgana. Your death means another attempt for me, but it also means another attempt for you. Although, I'm not sure if you have much of a chance."

"HEY!!! BASTARD!!!!" This time Merlin's shout evoked some attention. Kyulds turned to see Merlin standing near the shore, outraged by what his future self had just done. "You're a MONSTER!!!" He grunted as he threw Excalibur over the water. 

"It's no use, Merlin. I have no need of the sword. It's over, you might as well-"

Excalibur never quite reached the lake. It had been stopped in the air by a gloved hand emerging from the water. 

Kyulds froze, transfixed by the sight. 

The rest of the man began to appear. 

"It... it can't be... no, I'm dreaming again."

Arthur said nothing as he stood there, Excalibur in his hand, water running off his armor and hair. He stood at ankle height, but well into the lake, far enough away from the shore where he shouldn't have been able to stand. 

Morgana shifted against the tree. It must be Freya's magic holding him up. This has to work. She gasped as another breath sent shockwaves of steaming hot knives coursing through her body. And it had to work fast. She was already doing all she could to not pass out from the pain. Her life force was this world's only link to the future. If she died... Kyulds would be able to reset it.

"Merlin?"

Kyulds sank to his knees. "I'm not Merlin anymore."

Arthur swallowed. "Then... then everything has been for nothing. My return will be in vain for there will be no one waiting for me. There will be no one to help and guide me."

"M- maybe I'm not right for that. I'm not strong enough, destiny got it wrong."

"There will be no one there to be my friend."

Kyulds looked up at him. "I... I'm trying to be your friend. I'm trying to get to you, I'm trying to die."

"Merlin, after everything we've been through, you can't abandon me now. You can't disregard our destiny."

"Arthur..." He was shaking now, sobs taking his entire body. "Arthur I can't... I'm so alone..."

"It... I..."

Morgana's silently urged her brother on, but he was losing steam. He glanced in her direction and she did her best to give him a reassuring sign, but the sight of her only seemed to terrify him more. She grabbed onto the loose bark of a tree and tried to hoist herself up. The bark snapped and she fell back to the ground, the fire in her stomach lurching with her movement. She whimpered as she turned her head to look back at the scene near the lake. 

"It'll be okay," Arthur said.

"How can you promise that??"

"I... I just can."

Kyulds looked up, doubt flashing across his face. "I need you to come back."

"I will."

"How long will I have to wait?"

"I don't know. You have to trust that I will."

"I..."

"You can. I've... I've never known someone stronger, someone more capable. I wouldn't want anyone else waiting for me."

"Arthur, this is not what I wanted... never what I saw..."

"Things that are good, tend to come about in trying ways."

"And try they do..."

"M- Merlin?"

Kyulds took a step towards the lake and cocked his head. "There's something..."

"You need to stop this, Merlin. You need to set everything right. You have to let things happen the way they're supposed to, and-"

"And what is supposed to happen?"

"Huh? I-"

His eyes drifted in Arthur's direction, focusing on the prince with a curious gaze. "I do not..." He looked towards Morgana who lay dying, white fire in her stomach. His eyes narrowed as he turned back to Arthur. "Do not be cruel."

"Merlin-"

"I beg you. Do not be cruel."

"Don't be cruel?!" The younger Merlin emerged from the forests edge, his cloths still dripping wet with water from the lake. "You don't have sympathy for any of us, but you want us to have sympathy for you?!"

"Merlin..." Morgana tried to push herself up from the rocks, but she couldn't, only managing a hoarse whisper. "Merlin... no..." He was going to give it away... what was he doing?! 

"You're sick! I'm ashamed if you are what I have to look forward to for the future!"

"I have the upmost sympathy for you!" he seethed, bending over and gesturing in at himself. "It is my sole motivation." Something passed over his face and his legs collapsed under him. He caught himself with his hands. "After all I've told you..."

"It's selfishness! That's what it is!!" Merlin fumed. "Albion needs us!"

"I don't care about Albion!!!"

"I need you!" Arthur called out. 

Kyulds' eyes flitted back towards the prince, his golden gaze calculated and meticulous. "Drop this cruel charade, Prince Arthur. You have yet to become the king you're destined to be."

Immediately, Arthur approached the shore, struggling to move through the water. "You're right... you're right..." he paused, "you're right. But you believed, didn't you? You believed for a moment."

"Maybe I did."

"What did it feel like?"

The weathered Merlin's hands tightened around the small rocks on the shore. His lips turned white as he pressed them together, his entire body quivering as it tried to conceal his obvious emotion. The gold beacon in his eye faded in and out. "I just..." He brought his hand to support his face, his sleeve wrapping around his fingers. "I just want you back... I lost the love of my life, I lost a friend in Morgana, I lost my father, but Arthur..."

"What?"

"Unknowingly, you were there through it all."

"There's a lot I don't know about you."

"The biggest regret I had... the man who I considered my best friend died without knowing the real me. Well, knowing the real me, but not for very long. Not nearly enough time. Not enough time." His breathing was littered with shaking sobs. 

"What did it feel like, Merlin?" Arthur asked again.

"It felt like... hope... and it felt good."

<<o>>

Morgana's mind was drifting away from the commotion, away from the chaos. Dancing in front of her eyes were memories she didn't remember making, circumstances she had contemplated, but not experienced. What was this? Was this some sort of tradition? Every time Kyulds would take her life he would make her relive all her attempts, all her mistakes. She saw Kyulds' wicked smile, saw the flash of gold beneath his gaze. Her neck snapped, poison choked her heart, she had a branch through her chest, she was falling from the north tower...

"Morgana?!" 

She she tried to jerk away. It was him! It was the monster!

"Morgana, wake up! Wake up!! Please! wake up!!" He was shaking her, desperately holding glowing hands over her gaping wound. "I can't do it! I can't do it! Morgana, you have to wake up!!"

She opened here eyes fully. "M- Merlin?" It was him, hovering over her. Not the Merlin she had come to fear, but the young innocent eyed boy who refused to poison his friend. 

"Yes! You've got to wake up! Something's... something's happening..."

She did her best to sit up, but could only manage to lift her head for a minuscule moment before she had to fall back. "What... what happened? Kyulds..."

"Gone."

"What?"

"It didn't go exactly to plan, well not at all actually..." Again, he whipped his head frantically, trying to garner as much of their surroundings as possible. 

"I don't understand. Merlin-"

"Morgana, I don't want to die!"

This took her by surprise. She stared into his wide eyes. As the world phased back into focused, she noticed his heavy breathing and the way with which he strained to remain beside her, struggled to remain in one spot. She was now acutely aware of her own body being pulled in all directions. "You're not going to die. Kyulds will never succeed, it's impossible."

"Kyulds is gone, Morgana! But he's left a storm in his wake!"

"Gone?! Gone where?!"

"Morgana, please! We don't have time! I don't want to die!"

Fierce and wild was the wind that tore at their bodies. Scenery only an arms length away was concealed by the debris carried by tumultuous winds. She no longer had a view of the lake. She squinted her eyes to see through the spray of water, sand, and earth that tried to blind her. "What... what is this?!" She shouted over the howling storm.

"Everything's gone! Everything's being destroyed! Arthur and Freya were already swept away."

"What do you mean?"

"They were consumed!" He braced himself against a particularly fearsome blast.

Amidst the chaos, Morgana couldn't help but settle into a comfortable feeling of warmth and complacency. 

Merlin, obviously noticing the calmness of her expression and demeanor, narrowed his eyes. "Morgana, are you alright? You have to push through, your wound isn't too deep, if we could only get back to Gaius, he could-" She grabbed his wrist as he attempted to recite a spell. He pulled back. "Morgana, I'm trying to help you. If you just-"

"There's no point, merlin. Everything's... everything's different now."

"What are you talking about?"

She looked around at the whirling air around her, watched as the world was deconstructed piece by piece. She almost laughed as the calamity of it all. "Don't you see, Merlin?"

He shook his head, anxious tears running down his cheeks. "They've gone, they've all gone. I don't want to go, too." He screamed as a violent gust nearly carried him away. "I don't know what's happening, Morgana, I'm afraid!"

She tightened her grip on his wrist, pulling him in so he would be able to hear her clearly over the havoc and wreckage. "If Kyulds has truly left, then... then maybe we haven't failed after all."

"What's wrong with the world?"

"It's... slipping away. This world will no longer exist. It was never meant to exist in the first place."

His eyes widened further. "What do you mean?"

"These events... they needed to happen, but..." she met his eyes. "You were never meant to know this early."

"So, that's it? It's all over?"

"You're not going to die. Everything will just be like it was-"

"No! No, I don't want that! I want the memories I have now! I want to remember you!"

She pulled him into a hug. "This isn't goodbye."

"But it is... what if I forget this you. What if you forget this me! If this world is slipping away... Morgana, I want to remember! Without the things I know now, what if I make the same terrible mistakes?!"

Her eyes scanned their surroundings as she thought. She observed the howling dust and the cruel dulled brown clouds blowing closer and closer. "Merlin... I don't know."

"I'm going to be the person who poisoned you instead of offering help."

Morgana shook her head. "No."

"It's... it's okay. I'm okay," his eyes softened, "I..." his lip quivered, "You can't forget me."

"Merlin..."

"In the future... I wronged you. I should have been there for you then, but please... you have to remember how I was here for you now. Promise me you'll remember!"

Morgana's heart sank as she nodded. "I promise," she said, although she had no way of knowing of she even had the ability to keep that promise. The storm that swirled around them ripped at them, desperately trying to swallow them like it had consumed the world around them. It was becoming harder to breathe. Her heart felt light. Her thoughts were abstract and muddled, thinking in colors and textures rather than words. The turmoltuous force was familiar. Everything was spinning like it had when Kyulds had taken her from the future. 

"Morgana! You have to remember!" His face was nowhere insight, but his voice was clear. "Morgana, you need to remember, it is the only way!"

The alarming pace with which the fabric of life was swirling around her, the intensity with which she clung to the boy in front of her all ended in an instant. The only thing left in her mind was the nothingness that filled her eyes and the ringing her ears picked up when there was nothing else to hear. 

Chapter Text

Morgana was awake before she opened her eyes. She tested her surroundings, feeling dry strands of charred grass at her fingertips and the scratchy sensation of weather fried fabric against her skin. There was a pungent smell in the air, one that was instantly recognizable. There had been a tragic battle nearby. It was the only explanation for the rotten scent of blood carried by the wind.

She opened her eyes and blinked to grow accustomed to the filtered light trying to burst through the overcast sky. She tilted her head up and spluttered through the dryness of her throat and the dull pain in her stomach. She felt the spot cautiously with her hand, but found nothing. Only a sore reminder of what must have been a terrifying dream. Wait...

Instantly she shot up, her breath quickened and her heart panicked. She looked around and spotted the stack of rocks and sword that marked Mordred's final resting place. She was back. Had it all been a vivid hallucination, a scenario cooked up by a dream?

"Morgana?" Or was it another dreamed prediction? for like in her experience, the young form of Mordred now stood in front of her, his ocean cloak drifting in the breeze around his shoulders and his arm clutching at his wounded side. "Morgana?"

"I know what you're here to do."

He shook his head. "I'm not here to do anything."

Morgana narrowed her eyes.

"You have the right to be suspicious."

"It wasn't a dream?"

"Unfortunately not."

"Then why are you here now?" Against her better judgment, she drew closer. "And why are you in that cruel disguise?"

His form flickered at her question, eventually morphing and growing into something she had been forced to become familiar with: the uniformed Merlin, covered in blood of his own and of his son's. Only now, his one golden eye that had been a staple of his intimidating appearance, was gone. Back, was the comforting pale blue hue. "I'm sorry... poor judgment." They paused for a moment, Morgana surveying him wearily.

"What has happened?"

He took a breath. "We... helped each other."

"You essentially kidnapped me, held me in another time to-"

"I think we can agree that both our initial intentions were malicious, but look where we've landed." He gestured to the land around him.

"I still don't quite understand."

"I wish I could stay. I wish I could make everything clear, but I'm running out of time as it is. In only a few more moments I will... cease... so to speak."

"You'll cease?"

"Cease to exist."

Morgana was unnerved by the sympathy she felt for the man in front of her who had, for what felt like forever, been such a formidable enemy in more ways than one.

"I don't-"

"You were able to draw me back, Morgana. You were able to use the past to draw me back. For so long I was trapped in two, my body and magic persevering to end my own life, while the lightness of my soul followed behind, trying to piece myself back together, trying to undo my terrible mistake." He lightly brushed his wounded chest with his hand. "But there are some things that you can't take back."

"What's to happen now?"

"I am no longer an aimless monster, pillaging through time to my own end. This means you have a chance to prevent my mistake, to erase this mutilated version of me from history." He came even closer to Morgana, his fierce eyes fixing her with a haunting gaze. "Destiny has chosen you, Morgana. It has chosen you as it has chosen me. It is important that you recognize the burden of this responsibility as well as the importance of the lesson my mistakes have taught you."

"And what lesson is that?"

"Solitude and seclusion are the beginnings of destruction. Hope, left to its own devices, can turn on you in an instant, but that doesn't mean it isn't necessary."

"But what am I supposed to do?!"

He smiled, his body already fading into the breeze. "You've seen many things in the last weeks, Morgana. You have been given the gift of knowledge. You mustn't waste it."

Morgana was again left alone on the hill with only one thought plaguing her mind. The young warlock who was -right now- carrying a wounded Arthur to his death, needed her help. She already knew where he would be traveling, where he thought he would be able to save his king. With new found energy, she raced away towards the lake of Avalon.

<<o>>

They had made it. They were there. Merlin clutched the reins of Arthur's horse with trembling fingers, searching the shore for something that could take them to the Isle. He tethered the horse to a tree as he began to pace more frantically along the lake shore. The last time he was here there had been a small raft...

"What are you looking for?"

Merlin didn't turn to look at the king to answer his question. He already knew the face of his king would be colorless and gaunt. He needed no reminder time was running out. "A boat... a raft or something. Something to get you to that island." He pointed in the distance where the decaying ruins were just visible through the fog.

"Merlin..."

"I don't see one, maybe I'll take a trip round this bend... maybe the wind moved it since last-"

"Merlin, there's not enough time, you-"

"You're right. I can levy one of these trees and with magic it can serve as a boat and we can-"

"Merlin, please." Arthur's tone had shifted from one of sympathy, to a king giving an order to his subject. As soon as he had Merlin's attention, his expression softened again. "It's too late. It won't matter, Merlin, you can't save my life."

Merlin shook his head once. "I can," he said, walking over to Arthur and helping him down from his horse. "I'm not going to lose you." He braced himself against Arthur's weight, trying in vain to carry him to the rocky shore. 

"Merlin... just," Arthur collapsed, bringing Merlin down with him, "just hold me... please..." 

Merlin didn't answer. The truth of Arthur's words slowly becoming reality. The silence was filled by their heavy breathing, not only tired from their treacherous journey, but exhausted by their many adventures through the years. They had been tired before, but something was different this time. As much as Merlin didn't want to accept it, he could feel that this adventure wouldn't end like the others. They would not return to Camelot together. They would not be greeted by the beaming face of their queen as she ran down the courtyard steps. Merlin would receive no embrace from his guardian, would not hear Gaius whisper in his ear how proud he was of his ward.

"There's something I want to say."

"You're not going to say goodbye."

"No... Merlin, everything you've done, I know now. For me, for Camelot, for the kingdom you helped me build."

"You'd of done it without me."

"Maybe," he smiled at the thought, imagining how impossible it would have been. "I want to say something I've never said to you before..." he struggled to take another breath, knowing deep down that it would be his last, "thank you..."

<<o>>

Hot tears fell from Morgana's eyes as she watched Merlin begin to scream. She had thought that it had been her who directly caused Arthur's death. She thought if she didn't interfere, maybe they would have made it, maybe with the horses...

Merlin attempted to stand up, pulling Arthur along by the shoulders. He shook with the effort, moaning with struggle and sorrow. Arthur's boot was wet with lake water. That was how close they'd been. Arthur died with one foot in the lake. 

Merlin arched up, emitting a guttural shout in a language that Morgana couldn't recognize. When he finished, his body retracted once more, curling around his lost friend.

Morgana couldn't wait any longer. She stepped out from her hiding place behind a tree. Her foot caught on a stray branch which snapped under her weight. Merlin's head jerked up towards the sound. As soon as he saw her, his already teary red eyes brimmed with hatred that shouldn't have been possible from the kind boy that Morgana had left only hours ago. She could clearly see how he had aged. His shoulders had widened and his face sharpened along with his features. 

"What are you doing here?!"

"I-" she couldn't find the words. 

"Have you come to finish me off!? Your work here is already done!!" He gestured to the lifeless Arthur. "You've succeeded!" A strange and unfamiliar grin broke through his grief, a sardonic mocking smile. "You finally have what you want! Are you happy now? Can your people finally be free?"

"It's not what I wanted, not what I-"

"Leave me!"

"Merlin, it's not what I wanted, I promise you! If I knew what would come of it... if I knew then what I know now. Merlin, he's my brother, I should never have wanted him dead."

"You have no right to consider him a brother! If anything..."

"And I know that," she took an imploring step forward. "But, Merlin, I've changed. I know now my mistakes of the past were foolish and... and..." her voice wavered. She had assumed that since her memory remained intact, Merlin's would too. She didn't know what had brought her to that conclusion. Hope, possibly. But maybe... 

It had only been her and Kyulds who had travelled back in the first place. Everything from that timeline had been whisked away as Kyulds left. That version of Merlin with the memories they shared together was gone, the loss he himself feared would happen. Perhaps the only reason Morgana had retained her memory was that that version of her never belonged in that time in the first place. "Merlin, I want to be better. I want to repair what I've done, I want to-"

His head shook vehemently. "I don't believe you."

And why should he? Morgana asked herself. For him, it had been only days ago that she had ordered Mordred to drive his sword into Arthur's heart. She stared at him, unable to think of a way she could convince him of her good intentions. 

"Leave."

She couldn't move.

"Leave!"

"I just wanted to say-"

"I said LEAVE ME!!" His eyes burned gold as he held out his hand. Excalibur flew from where it had been attached to Arthur's saddle. Hecaught it in his hand. Magical energy crackled around the blade as he held it aloft, taunting Morgana with its deadly power. "Leave!" he screamed again as tears resumed pouring down his face. 

She didn't need any more convincing. She retreated into the forest. Maybe approaching him directly after Arthur's death was foolish... maybe... but she couldn't think of what she should do. She slumped down at the base of a tree and buried her face in her hands. She had thought defeating Kyulds was the greatest obstacle she would have to overcome. She thought that with his irradiation, she would be able to save her brother, continue to rebuild her friendship with Merlin, and repair her many mistakes of the past. But here she was. Alone again. She began to cry. How cruel it all was! She had thought that destiny brought her on this journey so she could rebuild the future from the past, but now she was back here. Back to a time where she was hated and isolated, void of the relationships she had rekindled.

"You shouldn't cry, Morgana." A warm gentle glow scattered the light under the shaded trees. Morgana looked up to meet Freya's smiling eyes. "I see you've found yourself at my lake once more."

"What am I supposed to do now? When Kyulds became whole... I didn't realize..."

"When Kyulds was reunited once more with the pieces of his missing soul and he became Merlin again, he no longer wished to meander through the past. He began to reset time, like he always did when an attempt at a young Merlin's life failed, however... this time he knew he needed to change something. This time... he took you with him. Many times had he recruited you to bring you to the past, but when you failed he always left you dead to be swept away by the crumbling timeline."

"Why would he take me?"

"It was important to keep your memories intact. Although he brought you back there to do terrible things, you learned from it, you grew from it. You are the person that Merlin needs even if he doesn't realize it yet."

"I don't understand."

"It's alright if you don't. I didn't truly understand what destiny was planning, letting Kyulds rampage through time... I didn't understand until now."

Morgana wiped her eyes on the sleeves of her tattered dress. "Why am I here? Why did things happen this way?"

"Merlin must wait for Arthur. He must be there for him when he returns, a day which has been written since the creation of magic itself. But there was something unexpected."

"What?"

"Freya shook her head sadly. "Spending all that time waiting to be there for his king... there was no one there for him." She met Morgana's eyes. "But you... you know now. You have been given a true second chance. Not a chance to go back in time and fix your mistakes, but a chance to move on from them and do something good in return."

Morgana's lip trembled. "How long should I wait? I tried to approach him, I tried to talk to him, but he didn't take to it very well."

Freya nodded. "Arthur has just died. It might take some time for him to be able to start trusting you again." She knelt down beside Morgana and helped her to her feet. "But you mustn't worry about that now. Before you can focus on others you must focus on yourself. You need to rebuild yourself, Morgana. Before Merlin can trust you, you have to make up for your terrible errors. You need to show the world how much you've changed and then... then..."

"How ling will I have to wait?"

"You have a long life ahead of you, Morgana. Not as long as Merlin's, but magic has always thrived within you and if you allow goodness back into your heart... you will live and long and fulfilled life, free to amend."

"That's not an answer."

Freya sighed. "I don't know, Morgana. There are many things I do not know."

"That's alright." She peered though the trees from where she'd come. "One more thing..."

"Of course."

"Emrys... he's still my doom?"

Freya nodded. "There are some prophecies that are open to interpretation and I think this is one such prediction."

"Go on."

"You've returned to this time a different person from when you left."

Morgana understood. "And I have mostly Merlin to thank for that. He let me see how everything isn't as black and white as I thought."

"So... You met your doom at Emrys' hand. Your monstrous self was destroyed by his unintentional council."

Morgana smiled. "I suppose you're right."  

From where she stood, although she couldn't see Merlin, she had a clear view of the lake and could see something making its way across the water. It was Arthur. She watched as the raft flickered with fire, not able to take her eyes away until the Once and Future King was completely consumed by the depths.  

"I've come a long way, Arthur, dear brother," she said. "I'm not going to waste this second chance."

Chapter Text

The death of King Arthur was mourned throughout the entire kingdom. The people had loved the fair and just man who they had watched grow and mature from a young age. He had led them to victory many times and his loss still didn't quite feel real. The sorrowful months after the battle of Camlann were followed by a devastating winter, which usually would have dampened their spirits, but the hopeful news that reached their ears kept them warm and rejoicing through the season. Queen Guinevere was with child. She was carrying the ere and the reminder of King Arthur that Camelot so desperately needed. 

Morgana was delighted by the news. She still had yet to approach anyone from her past life, but she intended to make amends in any way that she could. She had been using her magic for good, rebuilding war torn landscapes, enchanting fields of crops to have unusually spectacular harvests, and helping the people of Camelot anyway that she could.

Her new life was lonely, but she was comforted by the knowledge that she was working towards forgiveness instead of away from it. Guinevere's baby boy was born just as the first signs of spring began to filter through the landscape. She wondered if this was the right time to rebuild her relationship with her oldest friend. Maybe it was. 

The guards would never let her pass. She needed a disguise. A slight alteration of her appearance was in order. 

She filed into the courtyard along with hundreds of other citizens all wanting to get a glimpse of their future king. Some were singing drunken songs of celebration, others stared up at the balcony, not wanting to miss the moment when it finally came. Morgana peered at the faces, here eyes locking on one particular face that she didn't think she would ever forget. The long white beard and hair surrounding the pale face of an old man. His sparkling young eyes shining through his elderly appearance. She approached him cautiously. He met her gaze, recognition passing behind his eyes. 

"I thought aging spells were behind us, Emrys. After all, what need do you have to disguise yourself?"

He sighed, leaning heavily on the twisted stick he carried as a cane. "I thought you might come."

"I had to. I've come to speak with Gwen."

"She might not want to see you."

Morgana bit her lip. "I know. But I have to try."

He chuckled. "After everything you've done... do you really expect anyone to forgive you?"

She closed her eyes. "No. I don't know. I at least want to deliver my apology."

"You know... I've noticed a few things lately, heard a few stories."

"It's not altogether unusual for stories to be shared."

"I've heard rumors about a strange old witch who had been wandering around Camelot's lands, doing good deeds... there are those that speculate that this kind old woman is the last high priestess of the old religion."

"And those speculators would be?"

"Me." He looked her in the eye. "At first, you puzzled me. Why, after everything, would Morgana Pendragon throw away all her beliefs. What happened that caused that awakening?" He smiled at her, something that Morgana hadn't expected. "And then... I had a most peculiar series of dreams."

"Oh?"

"Indeed I did. You locked me in a wardrobe."

Morgana returned his smile. "Sorry about that."

"So, it wasn't a dream after all..."

She shook her head, euphoria flooding her entire body. "No, no it wasn't." Her joy was so intense that she could already feel tears brimming in her eyes. 

"You kept your promise."

"Of course," she laughed. "I should have made you promise not to forget me either." She looked at him curiously, pain and sorrow returning to his eyes as he looked away. "What is it?"

He took a shaky breath. "I'm afraid, Morgana. Afraid of becoming what we fought so hard against."

"You afraid of becoming Kyulds?"

He nodded, scrunching up his face to endure his overwhelming emotions. "I can feel it. I can feel the beginning of what he described. The hopelessness, the depression, the thought of death at my own hand... it's all there. I don't know how to stop it... I don't know how to stop it."

She grabbed his arm, remembering what Freya had told her she must do. "It's alright, Merlin. It will be different this time. You'll see."

"How can you promise that?"

"Because... this time you're not going to be alone. I'm going to be right here with you for as long as I can."

He let out a tight breath. "I don't know if I can... eventually I'll just lose you too..."

"Maybe. Maybe you will, but, Merlin... death and loss... it isn't permanent. You have to remember that life just continues. Time flows around us and no matter how hard we try, we cannot stop it. Time takes things away, it takes friendships, it takes youth, it takes loved ones... but it is what it is. There's nothing we can do about it but remember and treasure the memories that were gifted to us. If Arthur lived forever, his triumphs would cease to be triumphs, his glory would become dull and mundane. Too much of something good, it can... it can spoil. Everything must come to an end. Without ends, there would be no beginnings."

"Keeping Arthur safe was my life for so long," he sobbed. "How am I supposed to move on from a failure like that?"

"You... you... You keep it in your mind."

"Keep what?"

"Your motivation. Devote yourself to something new. Treasure the old memories, but make new ones, too."

"I can't see how I'm supposed to do that."

"That's alright... that's alright. I don't think it'll be clear right away. But I'm going to be here. I'm not going to let you fall down the wrong path. It's... it's my destiny." Morgana reached into Merlin's cloak and pulled out the blue vile of liquid that would remove his disguise. "You shouldn't push away your friends, Merlin. You need to face them."

He took a breath and took the bottle from her hand. "You need to face them, too," he said, referring to her own disguise. He uncorked the bottle and drank the liquid. 

There was a cheer from the crowd as Gwen stepped out onto the balcony, holding a small bundle in her arms. She beamed at her subjects and at the chosen knights who surrounded her. 

Both Merlin and Morgana smiled at the sight. 

"She looks..."

"Happy."

"She looks hopeful."

THE END

<<o>>

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed, I had a lot of fun with this one. I hope everything made at least some sense.