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Abby rushed into the kitchen where Maggie was making some coffee. She was anxious and nearly out of breath as she checked the room to make sure they were alone.
Then before Maggie turned around to properly greet her, she plastered on her stoic face of practiced bravado.
"Morning Mags, to what do I owe the displeasure?"
Maggie rolled her eyes and sipped her coffee thoughtfully. "You're the one who came to see me, presumably. What's up? Trouble in paradise?"
Abby's eyes widened and her mask of indifference fell off abruptly. "What? Why would you say that? Did Mel say something?"
Her voice came out panicked and she knew it.
Maggie's face softened. She set her coffee down on the island between them and patted the seat next to her.
Abby wordlessly sat beside her. "I have some...thoughts I want to discuss with you."
"Thoughts?"
Abby leaned in conspiratorially and whispered. "Feelings...and such."
She could tell Maggie was trying her best not to laugh at her. And frankly, it pissed her off.
"All right, out with it." She demanded with a huff.
Rather than laughing, Maggie took another sip of her coffee. "You do know I'm not your therapist, right?"
Abby raised an eyebrow and frowned. "Of course. Your advice is rubbish half the time and not worth paying for."
Maggie sighed. "It must be bad. You're pricklier than usual."
"No I'm not."
"Abby, what's on your mind?"
Abby played with her ring distractedly. The motion calmed her. It grounded her.
"Abby…"
Abby drew her eyes up to meet Maggie's sadly. "Do you ever get terrified that you are both too much and not enough at the same time?"
Maggie bit her lip and smiled sadly at her as she reached for her hand to slow the frantic movements. "Sometimes."
Abby was surprised but tried not to show it.
"Abby, what happened? You and Mel...you're doing great. Your family, Marisol...you all are…"
Abby pulled away from Maggie and stood up stiffly. "That's the thing though, isn't it? For the first time in my entire life I have everything I could have ever hoped for. A family. A home. Love." She took a deep steadying breath. "Which means...I actually have something worth losing."
She released a long, shaky breath as she waited for Maggie to reply.
"What makes you think you'll lose it?"
Abby rolled her eyes. "Oh...only a couple decades worth of experience."
"Are you sure this isn't cold feet?"
Abby glared at her. "I'm not second guessing anything. I want this. More than I ever allowed myself to want anything."
"And that's what scares you."
"Of course it does!" Abby groaned. "I love Mel with everything that I am. Good, bad, beautiful." She actually managed a smirk. "And rationally, I know she loves me too. For all that I am."
"But…" Maggie prompted when Abby didn’t continue.
Abby sat back down. "But what if that isn't true tomorrow? Or a year from now? Or ten?"
They are interrupted when Macy strolled through the door. She looked at them, saw the uncertainty in Abby's face. "Nope. This is not happening. You did not make me call out sick today to help you get everything ready and babysit for you to be having second thoughts. My sister deserves this. For some unthinkable and illogical reason, she loves your stupid half demon ass. And against all better judgment so do I...so NO. You are not going to break her heart because you suddenly realize that she deserves the world and you can't give it to her."
"Macy…" Maggie shook her head and tried to silence her.
Abby glided a few steps to close the distance between herself and Macy. "Don't you dare tell me what I can and can't do or what I do or don't deserve. Your sister is my entire universe and I show her what she means to me daily. Yes, I'm not perfect. But neither is she. And we're both better for it."
She had fire in her eyes as she passionately spoke the words.
"Damn straight. Good talk." Macy smirked proudly. "Now I'm going to find that adorable niece of mine and tell her that she gets to spend the day with her favorite aunt."
"Maggie and Waverly have equal claims to that title you know." Abby countered.
Macy glared at her. "Just let me have this."
Abby waved her off dramatically. "As you wish."
She couldn't help smiling as Macy rushed up the stairs to find the other part of Abby's entire world.
"So…" Maggie sidled up beside her and handed Abby a small, black box. "I assume you do still want this...and that you haven't changed your mind."
Abby snatched it from her gracefully. "I may be slightly…" She rolled her eyes when Maggie smugly raised an eyebrow at her. "Fine. I may have been significantly panicked...momentarily. But I'm fine now."
Maggie nodded. Abby assumed their conversation was over until Maggie spoke.
"We accept the love we think we deserve, you know."
Abby sighed and closed her eyes. She hated when they had real conversations about things that mattered.
Maggie continued, "And because you had objectively shitty parents who don't at all deserve such a title…" She softly touched Abby's forearm and squeezed. "You believed that love needed to be earned or deserved and never trusted that it could be freely given without being taken away just as quickly."
"Maggie, can we not?" Her tone was firm.
"You make her happier than she's ever been. Not because of who you are or aren't. Or what you do or don't do. Or what you can give her…" She paused and slapped Abby's forearm. "Your mind just went to sex and I hate that I will be forever scarred for it."
Abby genuinely laughed. "You were the one who brought up BDSM to help heal my trauma. Don't act like a prude now."
Maggie bit her lip and sighed loudly. "As I was saying...she loves you. And all you have to do is love her back. But honestly, she'll love you even if you don't. Because she's all in. And you know that. Now...the rest...your...feelings…" She whispered the last word like a curse word and Abby appreciated her for it. "Talk to her. You may find that she has her own insecurities and fears."
Abby's eyes widened in fear.
"What? No. Abby, did you not hear everything else I just said about her loving you?" Maggie demanded harshly.
Abby forced herself to calm down. She inhaled deeply and exhaled steadily. "Right. I can do this. I can talk to my girlfriend about…"
"Feelings?" Maggie provided unhelpfully and with a smirk.
"Yes. Thanks for the advice. Put it on my tab."
"But you don't have one…"
Abby left the room to the sounds of Maggie's frustrated cursing.
She hurried up the stairs with practiced ease. Mel was awake and dressed when she walked into the bedroom. She slipped the small box in her pocket as she closed the distance between them and kissed her passionately. She never tired of kissing Mel. She never tired of anything Mel related. She just hoped Mel felt the same way.
Mel pulled away from her with a frown. "Where'd you just go?" Mel asked as she smoothed out the wrinkle between Abby's furrowed brows with her soft fingertips. Abby couldn’t help leaning into the touch and rested her forehead against Mel's as she studied her.
"Happy Birthday, love."
Mel smiled and kissed her softly. "Thank you. Now talk."
She stepped away, took Abby's hand in her own and guided her to the bed they often shared when they were staying at Abby's place.
Abby had debated asking her to move in for ages but just like everything else involving Mel, she didn’t dare ask for too much. She felt that what she was already given was more than she deserved. Then Maggie's words echoed in her ears.
"Do you remember when you were pregnant and were scared that you wouldn't be a good mom?"
"Of course. I was terrified of ruining everything. Of running our daughter's life. Of not being good enough. Not being what she wanted. Or needed."
Abby squeezed her hand and brought it to her lips. She placed a soft, lingering kiss to her knuckles.
"What changed? When did those fears finally go away? How?"
Mel rested her head against Abby's shoulder. "They never did. I worry every day about making mistakes with her. With us. I worry about her every single minute. Her first broken heart. Her first broken bone. Her first disappointments and fears and any bullies and…"
"So help me God, if anyone bullies or breaks her heart they will face the wrath of a former demon overlord and the power of the Charmed Ones and…"
"We can't protect her from everything, Abby. All we can do is prepare her. Give her the tools to make the right decisions, support but also ground her when she makes the wrong ones, hold her when she cries, build her up when others tear her down."
"How do you do that? Just...trust that it will be okay? Trust that that will be enough?"
"Because you had less than that...and you turned out brilliantly."
"I turned out broken. And...I still struggle with things. A lot of things."
"I'm not going anywhere. You know that, right? We all have our own demons to face. Our own bruised and broken bits. And so will she. Will you love her any less for it?"
"Of course not. Are you daft?"
Mel smiled at her encouragingly. "So why do you doubt we'll love you any less for it?"
Abby pulled Mel into her and hugged her tightly. "I don't deserve you."
"I don't deserve anything less. You're it. You're what I want. And maybe someday you'll finally believe it."
Abby kissed her temple. "I do most days."
"And I'll remind you on the days you forget."
"Promise?"
"Always."
Abby smiled at her and stood up. Mel stared at her with confusion.
"I was hoping you'd say that." She knelt down to one knee and pulled the small box out of her pocket.
Mel's confusion gave way to surprise as her eyes filled with tears and her face morphed into that of pure, unadulterated bliss.
"Abby…" She breathed out in awe.
"You know I don't believe in soulmates. Or the whole 'you complete me' bullshit."
Mel rolled her eyes. "Always the romantic."
Abby shook her head, forced her shaky hands to still, and smiled at Mel with complete adoration.
"I don't need you to be complete. You don't make me want to be better. I am better because I know you. Because you love me. Maybe I don't need you...but I choose you. I wake up every single day and I am grateful that you chose me too. I choose you because your presence brings me joy even if we're just sitting alone, together. I choose you every time I see you with our daughter and how you are the most amazing mother to her. The most amazing sister. And friend. I choose you when you look at me like...despite all evidence to the contrary, I am what you always wanted. I choose you every time you get angry with your sisters and curse at them in Spanish so Marisol doesn't know the bad words. Even though she now can and does curse in two languages. Three if you count the time I taught her some ancient demonic curse words just to piss off Harry and Macy."
Mel laughed at that.
"I love you with all that I am despite the fact that I am still unsure if I know how to love properly."
"You do. Better than most even."
"I want every single day with you to just be another day because I know you're going to be there when I wake up and that we get to do it all over again tomorrow. I love fighting evil with you. Vanquishing evil with you. But I love playdates with Lydia and Marisol more. And I love lazy Sundays when your sisters take Marisol for the day and we stay in bed for hours. But also when we sit on the couch and read to each other. I just...I love every moment with you."
"I love all of that as well. And I do appreciate how romantic and sweet you're being right now. But are you going to ask me or not? Because I really would like to move on to the part where we celebrate."
Abby smiled darkly. "Just because it's your birthday, you really think you're entitled to sex?"
"Is that the question you want to ask me? Because if that's all you want to know…"
"Bloody hell. Mel Vera, thorn in my side. Witch of my heart. Will you please do me the honor and say you'll be mine forever?"
Abby could tell Mel was fighting her instincts to tease her. To give a sarcastic response. And just like Abby, who went against her baser instincts daily, just to be worthy of this phenomenal woman...Mel bit her tongue. Held back the jab. And instead, tackled her to the ground and smothered her with kisses between all the "Yeses."
And because Abby could never deny Mel Vera anything, she rewarded her with several rounds of celebratory sex. Not that she wasn't equally excited to celebrate. And since when had she ever said NO to sex with Mel Vera? Her fiance. Her person. Her everything. Now and forever. And every day in between.