Work Text:
Breaking the laptop wasn’t entirely Kokichi’s fault.
He might have been the one to set up the prank involving silly string, eggs, toy cows, and glow-in-the-dark slime, but he didn’t mean for his precious laptop to be hurt in the process. It’s not like he planned for Miu to walk through the door and freak out upon having eggs dropped on her head. He didn’t plan for her to run into the glow-in-the-dark slime before he had the chance to spray her with silly string, and most definitely didn’t plan for her to trip on a toy cow causing her to drop his laptop onto the floor.
On second thought, yeah, maybe it was his fault (not that he would ever admit that to Miu), but now he had a bigger problem on his hands. Now he needed to get someone to fix the laptop that the dumb bitchlet broke.
Any other day, he would ‘force’ one of his subordinates to do it, but they were all too busy and he needed to catch up on that fanf- work on some super-secret evil plans. So, Kokichi turned to what everyone does when they have to get something fixed, pay some dumb schmuck to repair it.
Walking into the tech store with some generic name based on a pun, he looked over the counter only to have a mini (read also: huge) gay panic on the spot. There stood the most beautiful man he had ever seen fixing some random person’s cracked phone screen. He had a black cap atop navy blue hair that was in his face just enough to make him look emo and golden eyes that were staring at the phone so intently, completely laser focused on fixing it..
What. The. Hell.
Who the fuck gave this random tech support guy the right to be so pretty? Forget tech support, this guy needed to be on the cover of a Hot Topic magazine or something (Did Hot Topic even do magazines?). Shoving the random gay panic aside, he walked over to the counter where the tech support guy was standing.
“Do I need to become a cellphone to get your attention? I would gladly arrange for that if it meant you had all eyes on me.” Kokichi winked as if he didn’t just deliver the worst introduction known to mankind. At least he was self-aware.
When he looked up from where he was staring at the phone the boy’s golden eyes met his own and damn if those eyes weren’t that much prettier when they were focused on him. Something about being looked at by pretty people rendered Kokichi helpless.
“Oh, uh- sorry about that, I wasn’t paying too much attention…” he said, rubbing his neck. “Welcome, my name is Shuichi, how may I be of assistance?”
Pulling out the laptop that was covered in silly string, he slid it over the counter towards the sexy tech repair guy Shuichi. Shuichi’s eyes widened, dumbfounded by the state of the laptop,
“What the fuck did you do to your computer? Shit, excuse my language, wait- crap uh- sorry,” Shuichi tripped over his words, looking away from Kokichi embarrassed.
Kokichi paid no mind though, too busy indulging in some fantasy (as you do when you see an attractive person.) “That was so hot. Sir, please marry me on the spot.”
“Excuse me? Marry you?”
“Shit, I said that out loud… Ignore that- unless you’re actually interested in my offer- in that case, please do.”
Ignoring Kokichi’s comment, Shuichi took the laptop and began looking over it. “The current condition of the laptop doesn’t look too bad besides all of the uh silly string… Do you know what about it is currently broken?”
Kokichi rolled his eyes recounting the story, “All was going great one fine day as I set up for the perfect prank. Said prank was going fabulously until my stupid whore bitchlet of a roommate came over and dropped my laptop onto the floor.”
Nodding, Shuichi continued to inspect the casing of the laptop, removing some of the silly string as he did so. “Do you know if the laptop still turns on?”
“It does, but it makes this weird buzzing sound. I wasn’t able to log in to check, but if any of my files are missing I will not hesitate to send the entirety of my evil organization after you. A tech support boy such as yourself would never stand a chance against my 10,000 members,” Kokichi said with an evil smirk.
Not even bothering to entertain the idea, Shuichi called him out on his obvious lie. “There’s no such organization that exists. I would’ve heard of it by now,” Shuichi said, plugging in the laptop and hitting the power button.
Immediately, the machine whirred to life with a distinct buzzing sound. “Can you please input your password?” Shuichi asked, sliding Kokichi his laptop which was already opened to the login screen.
Typing in his password (which totally wasn’t just Password42069 or anything) Kokichi slid the laptop back over to Shuichi. The laptop opened up to a fanfiction about a phantom thief and detective out on a rooftop chase. “So you read fanfiction too huh?” Shuichi asked, skimming the page.
“No, of course not, a supreme leader such as myself would never do such a thing!” Kokichi stated confidently.
“Just saying if you did there’s nothing wrong with that. You’ve got some good taste in stories,” Shuichi commented before going back to the laptop. This was an interesting development… so the cute guy that worked at the tech shop complimented his taste in fanfiction? God could this guy get any more attractive than he already is???
Shuichi spoke once more snapping Kokichi out of whatever weird train of thought he was on. “From what I’ve seen, I can conclude that the hard drive has been fried. If it isn’t fixed or replaced soon, you’re most likely going to end up with all of your data being wiped from the laptop. I can replace it now if you would like?”
Fuck. Of course, his hard drive was fried. Just when he needed it to finish writing, it’s not like he had to finish submitting this by midnight or anything. Goddammit, why did he always procrastinate everything and wait to finish writing last minute? “Can you get it fixed today? Someone like me has precious things to do with their time and I can’t afford to be waiting for this laptop to be fixed.”
Running the numbers in his head, Shuichi came up with a quote. “If we transfer over all the data we should be finished fixing this laptop in a couple of hours? It’ll cost you about $200 though.”
Well shit, there’s another thing he can’t afford. Who decided that this kind of thing had to cost an arm a leg and his entire savings. Maybe he could afford it if he decided to give up on heat for the next month? That’s a great idea in mid-February! Or perhaps going online and selling his organs would work too…
“Heeeeyyyy cutie…” Kokichi winked at the tech support worker. “Do you think you can cut the price for little ol’ me? As a supreme leader, I obviously have TONS of money, but I require you to give me a discount,” Kokichi demanded.
“I’m afraid I can’t do that for you. It wouldn’t be right for me to give you any sort of special privilege…” Shuichi said, looking nervous as he couldn’t quite meet Kokichi’s eyes.
Realizing this clearly wasn’t going to work, Kokichi gave a small pout before giving into his last resort… begging. “Listen, I don’t do this often and I’m only going to do it once… I really need this laptop fixed by tonight, but I won't get paid again for another week… If you don’t mind, and I get that this sounds really sketchy, but can you let me pay some of it now and the rest later? I’m being 100% honest right now and I pinky promise that I’ll return the money, Supreme Leader's honor,” Kokichi said, crossing his heart and offering his pinky. Sure maybe his ego took a hit having to do this but he needed that laptop desperately.
Shuichi looked from Kokichi’s extended pinky back to his face and studied it for a moment. Kokichi’s breath hitched unsure if this was really going to work. Then, slowly but surely Shuichi took his pinky and hooked it around Kokichi’s. Kokichi looked up at him, a look of surprise painted on his face.
Smiling warmly at him with what Kokichi was now dubbing the most beautiful eyes in existence (he was sure he wasn’t lying about this one), Shuichi nodded. “I’m going to trust you on this one, just get the money back to me by the end of the month and we should be able to work everything out.”
Grinning back at him Kokichi nodded, “ Wow I didn’t know that Mr. Emo Employee here was capable of trusting the known liar Kokichi Ouma! At this rate, it’ll be so easy to coerce you into joining my criminal organization!”
“I’m not going to be joining a criminal organization of any sort, I’m just going to be helping you get your laptop fixed and then you can be on your way.” Shuichi said as he carefully plugged in the hard drive to begin the data transfer.
With fake tears in his eyes, Kokichi looked up at Shuichi and began to sob, “WAHHHHHHHH YOU ALREADY WANT TO GET RID OF MEEEEEE. I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS HOW COULD YOU?????”
Jumping at the sight of Kokichi’s (fake) tears Shuichi set everything for the laptop aside to go help the shorter boy. “Are you okay? I’m sorry we could be friends if you want to be, don’t cry…”
How does this guy manage to act indifferent towards anything else yet freaks out at the sight of tears? He’s interesting, that’s for sure. Like a switch, Kokichi stopped crying and immediately put a grin on his face. “Awww you really fell for all the fake crying? Psh how lame.”
Shuichi didn’t say anything and instead went back to repairing the hard drive. Kokichi frowned, “You’re no fun at all…”
"Are all the employees you meet fun then?" Shuichi asked, giving Kokichi a curious look.
"Of course they are Saihara-chan! You just wouldn't know because you're such a boring employee. At least you're pretty," Kokichi laughed. It was true though, the employee really had his looks going for him.
Looking away Shuichi put a hand over his face to hide his blush, "You think I'm pretty?"
“Yeah me and anyone with eyes,” Kokichi said looking literally anywhere in the room but at Shuichi. Yes Kokichi had buckets of confidence (at least he pretended to) but pretty guys made him weak. Who could blame him for that?
Shuichi gave no response as he continued to fix the hard drive, not sparing Kokichi a second glance. The way this guy could go from caring to not giving a shit in the matter of two seconds truly was fascinating (albeit a little sad since Kokichi wanted his eyes to be on him). Kokichi wouldn’t be giving up that easily, oh no. So what if this guy was just a poor tech employee trying to live his life? He was going to have to face the wrath of a supreme leader.
Leaning over the counter to look at the hard drive Shuichi was busy fixing, Kokichi decided to be a brat super helpful! “Heyyyy Mr. Tech Support Worker! Any way I can help you with that?”
Pausing, Shuichi looked up to face Kokichi. Despite the jovial tone he had said it in, his face seemed 100% serious. “Why on Earth would you want to help? Isn’t that what you’re paying me for?”
Shrugging Kokichi placed his hands behind his head in a laid back and carefree manner, “Well yeah, but maybe I want to help because it would make for a great prank to break the hard drives on other people's laptops? Or maybe I just find it interesting watching you do this? Ooo Ooo Ooo what if it’s because you’re offering me the chance to return the money later than normal and I want to make this easier for you somehow? But that’s just a lie, I would never voluntarily help someone, I’m a supreme leader after all. I’ve got all sorts of underlings to do things like that for me.”
Pausing from where he was working on the hard drive, Shuichi looked at Kokichi studying his face. “Are you a detective or something? I know I’ve got a handsome face but no need to look at it that much,” Kokichi boasted.
“How can I not look at a face that pretty?” Shuichi responded.
A bright red shade took over Kokichi’s face after the unexpected compliment. Did the really cute tech support guy just call him pretty… This is fine. This is completely fine. Kokichi is completely fine and not at all having a mini gay panic right now. Willing away the blush, Kokichi looked back up towards Shuichi.
Whether or not Shuichi had seen the blush was unclear (he probably did but was too nice to comment on it). Instead, he just answered the question as if nothing had happened. “I’m not a detective yet, but I’m currently studying to be one. I was studying your face and it seems your earlier statement was a lie…”
Shocked, Kokichi looked at Shuichi in awe. So far he had taken every expectation Kokichi had for a tech store worker and ripped it to shreds. He hadn’t expected something like this, for the pretty boy working tech support to blow his mind and dare he say it, actually surprise him for once.
“Wowie Mr. Detective, you’re one of the only people to correctly solve one of my lies by trying to understand it. Gotta hand that one to you there, have a gold star,” Kokichi said, taking out a golden star sticker that said ‘You tried’ (don’t ask where the sticker came from, even Kokichi doesn’t know) and placed it on Shuichi’s head. “There you go!”
Shuichi gave a small chuckle moving the sticker from his face to his hat. He then unplugged Kokichi’s laptop, handing him the device. “Your hard drive should be good as new! The laptop can be used as normal. Just make sure not to leave it on for extended periods of time, if the hard drive keeps running it’s likely to break again. We wouldn’t want to see you here again too soon…”
“You’re already ready to get rid of me? Here I was thinking you actually valued our time together…” Kokichi said, faking a frown.
“No I do, I swear I value your time but uh I thought you had to go soon and I didn’t want to hold you up,” Shuichi said quickly.
Laughing Kokichi took the laptop from Shuichi, “Don’t worry about it Saihara-chan. Who dares not value the time of a leader such as myself?”
“Well most definitely not me,” Shuichi said with a smile. “Just remember the deal we made about the payment.”
Kokichi laughed, “Yes I know! I’ll be sure to make the payment back, I made a pinky promise after all!”
“Thank you for visiting the shop! I’ll look forward to your next visit,” Shuichi smiled and waved goodbye.
Kokichi left the shop with a smile on his face. Despite everything leading up to it, Kokichi was somewhat glad about this tech support visit. At the very least it helped get him into contact with a cute and somewhat sweet boy. Who could blame him if he ever had to go back because he ‘accidentally’ broke his laptop again?