Work Text:
(Almost) Midnight Train.
Goldenrod City, November 15th, 11.10 pm.
The late evening train was already quite full when it arrived at the station, and Goh couldn’t suppress a groan when they hopped in. He was starting to feel tired. The crowd was never his favourite part of a city trip, and they had been running around Goldenrod City all day. It didn’t help that he also had slept very little these last two nights, before their trip, and the frenesy of people rushing to get home was the last thing he wanted to deal with, right now. He wanted to be home, too - or at least, in their hotel room, far from the noise. But said hotel was on the opposite side of town, and Goh wasn’t sure he could take it until then. His limbs were sore from fatigue, tingling in an unpleasant way, and he was feeling a bit anxious, a headache starting in the back of his neck.
By his side, Satoshi didn't seem too overjoyed by their situation, either.
"It's so crowded. .."
It definitely was, and Goh’s hand tightened on the handle as he was trying to not come in contact with the strangers around them, uneasy; and it took him a few seconds to realize he unconsciously got closer to Satoshi while doing so, seeking a safe place.
True, over the past few months, he grew accustomed to Satoshi’s presence, and his habit of invading his personal bubble more often than not. But Goh didn’t mind as much as he thought he would. He got used to having him close - but maybe not that close. He could feel Satoshi's soft breath brushing his cheek, he could smell his familiar scent, he could feel the warmth emanating from his body; and suddenly, the tip of his shoes seemed a very interesting thing to look at, to Goh.
As the train's door opened again at the next station, more people rushed in, and before he could react, Goh’s hand snatched from the handle. And as he found himself pressed against the opposite door, Satoshi had to hold back against the wall so he wouldn't crash into him, arms on each side of Goh’s head, sheltering him.
"Sorry..."
Goh looked up. Hearts racing, there was a moment frozen in time where blue orbs dived in ambers, and it was just too close, and suddenly it was hard to breath - but not because of the crowd.
“Ah… it’s o-…”
But before any of them could process, the train swayed while taking a bend , throwing them off balance. Goh couldn't immediately grab anything from where he was, but before he could find something to hold, he found himself secured tightly by the shoulders, Satoshi dragging him close - even closer - to him.
“Gotcha!” exclaimed the trainer with a beaming smile - and Goh hoped he couldn’t see his blushing face now, as he got engulfed in the unexpected hug.
“You’re all right?”
Trying to regain some sort of composure, Goh adjusted his feet and steadied himself, even though Satoshi wouldn’t let go of him.
“I am. Sorry.”
“Don’t be.”
Goh resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Why did he have to be so casual about the whole thing? It was always like this. Satoshi would grab him by the shoulders in excitement, he would wrap his fingers around his wrist to drag him somewhere, he would lean shamelessly against his back to watch whatever Goh wanted to show him - even held his hand to guide him, insufferably gentle, when that Gulpin episode happened. And overtime, Goh had found himself doing the same. Maybe a bit more conscious, maybe with a messier heartbeat; and in the end, he could never tell if Satoshi knew how puzzling these moments were for him. If it was something normal to do for the trainer, or if it was something… something different. Something just for Goh .
The young researcher sometimes wondered where they were going ; it felt as if the lines were more and more blurred as time passed by… Or maybe it was just him. Just him, and his foolish crush, his unruly heart, and that stupid hope.
Satoshi could probably feel his heart racing furiously by now - how could he not, while he was hugging him so close? - and Goh forced himself to breathe steadily to calm down. His heart was so loud, blood pumping in his ears, that he couldn’t feel if Satoshi’s heart was doing the same - probably not, so he was just making a fool out of himself. No need to panic.
Until the next station, none of them moved, and Goh wasn’t sure what to do. Against Satoshi’s neck, Pikachu was softly snoring, keeping his balance out of years of habit, his ears cutely flopping down (Hibanny had been back in his Pokeball as soon the crowd had gotten tighter, and honestly, Goh couldn't blame him). They weren’t arriving anytime soon, but it was just… embarassing to stand like this, arms dangling stupidly along his body, while Satoshi was holding him, his free hand secured firmly on a free handle. None of the others were available, but maybe Goh could reach the bar behind Satoshi’s back and at least regain some dignity. He still didn’t dare to look at him in the eyes - not only because of their...close position, but he was sure that if he moved his face up, their noses would touch, and he was already too close to a heart attack to risk it.
“You don’t have to hold me all the way, you know.” he mumbled.
Satoshi shrugged.
“I don’t mind.”
Goh bit his lips at the answer. You’re not helping . A part of him was begging to escape, so his heart wouldn’t get bruised more than necessary, but an equal part was repeating don’t let me go over and over again in his mind, and that voice was definitely getting louder.
Maybe, in this time and space, the moment was calling for blurred lines and unsteady heartbeats, and Goh was too tired to fight it.
He could have stretched his fingers just enough to reach the bar behind. But, at the last moment, his arm wrapped around Satoshi's waist, and he held on to him instead.
If Satoshi was surprised, he didn't show. He didn't wince, didn't jump, didn't even shiver. If anything, he just oh so slightly tightened his embrace, squeezing Goh's shoulders gently, without a word.
The train was quiet and calm, and Goh realized strangers around them were probably feeling the same as he did. No one talked; some of them were already half-asleep, exhausted by late-night shifts, welcoming the shelter of the wagon after walking in the cold November air, and were just patiently waiting to be back home. Goh relaxed slightly, barely noticing how cosy he felt in his friend's arms.
His mind was fuzzy with fatigue, but he felt strangely comfortable now. The warmth emanating from their bodies pressed against each other was a reassuring cocoon, and now that they weren’t pushed around anymore, and that the train kept moving at a steady pace, exhaustion caught up to him. He didn’t have the energy to panic at the situation anymore.
He was feeling good, and safe, and comfy, and as he let his forehead rest against his partner’s shoulder, he let out a deep sigh of exhaustion. Shoot. Maybe he shouldn't indulge too much, but he was feeling so tired...
"Do we still have a long way to go?" he mumbled, his voice muffled by Satoshi's jacket.
The trainer looked up at the map above the door.
"At least 10 stations."
Goh groaned. He was so done ; he wanted to be over with that day and crash into bed. Plus, his eyes were burning, and the light from the wagon was starting to be a bit too bright to his taste.
Satoshi gently squeezed his embrace around his shoulders, and Goh crunched his nose on the soft spot below his friend's collarbone, closing his eyes and giving in to the fatigue.
"You tired?"
"Hm."
Satoshi let a small chuckle out, his voice calm and low, his lips brushing slightly Goh's hair and sending a warm and pleasant shiver down his whole body as he answered.
"You can relax. I've got you."
And Goh's hand tightened on his waist, and his head was a little heavier against him, and his body pressed imperceptibly closer to the trainer's. Of course he wouldn't fall asleep right here, but suddenly he wasn't dreading the long way home anymore. It didn't matter anymore how he despised the subway train, or its crowd. And before he dozed off, a realization crossed Goh's mind. He trusted Satoshi, on every level. Unconditionally. It was once again an unexpected feeling. A feeling he used to be afraid of; but it was a sense of peace that spread over him.
I've got you.
Yes. Goh had no doubts about it . And, maybe in this time and space, as the train movement kept rocking them gently, they were just at the right place, at the right moment.