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The first time Anakin receives a gift that's not a secretly and hastily handmade necessity from his mom, he's ten years old and he knows no other possession will ever matter to him more than this one. He's been Obi-Wan's Padawan for just over a month now and it's his first Name Day away from his mom. He has learned over the few short years of his life that Name Days and gifts are for people, not slaves. So when he comes home from his classes the evening of his Name Day to see his Master lighting a single candle on a small chocolate cake he is more than a little overcome with emotion.
Obi-Wan smiles when Anakin's eyes gleam as he stares unblinking at the candle. "Come along, Anakin. Make a wish and blow it out." Once he does, Obi-Wan takes a knife and cuts a rather large piece for Anakin and slides his plate towards him, his smile soft and encouraging. When Anakin takes a bite, his eyes widen comically large and he quickly shoves a second piece into his mouth, then a third, a fourth. Obi-Wan leaves him to it, content every time he gets to witness his new charge experience something for the first time.
When the cake and dinner are done--Really Obi-Wan, dessert before supper--he can just hear Qui-Gon teasing him, Obi-Wan leads Anakin to the small sitting room where a wrapped gift sits upon the small end table by the couch. Anakin sits down and Obi-Wan hands it to him. "Go on then, open it up."
Anakin has no regard for the shiny paper and all it's carefully folded, crisply taped ends. He tears into it faster than he did the cake. When the paper is in shreds around him what's left is a small plush animal with soft red-brown fur, long body, long floppy ears, long nose, long tail, short legs, big dark button eyes, and a perfect pink felt tongue. Anakin appears to be overwhelmed again as he holds the animal close to his chest for a solid minute before looking up with shining eyes.
"She's perfect," he says quietly. Obi-Wan smiles, and instead of fussing over the paper shreds, sinks into the couch and puts his arm over his shoulders, pulling him close and ruffling his short hair. They stay there for a few holo shows until Obi-Wan sees that Anakin has fallen asleep. He carefully picks him up and carries him to his room and puts him in his bed, tucking his blanket around his shoulders and stifling the sound he wants to make at the sight of his Padawan curled tightly around a plush stuffed animal in his sleep.
"Goodnight, my Padawan. And Happy Name Day," he whispers before the door silently slides shut.
-
Anakin is twelve when Baby loses her right eye the first time. The threads holding the black button to her face had been loosening over time but earlier when she was rescued from between the bed and the wall her threads finally gave out and her eye stayed behind. He had to crawl under the bed and search for it in the carpet, cringing at the feeling of crumbs under his palms until his fingers skimmed against something small, round, and hard. But when he came out and appraised her face he realized he had no way to fix her. His mom had always taken his ripped clothes and brought them back like new and his master had shown him once or twice how to thread a needle but aside from that he wasn't really sure how to sew.
He would ask his master. Surely Obi-Wan wouldn't be too upset about the damage, Baby was a gift after all. Maybe he wouldn't even care.
When Master Obi-Wan came home with takeout Anakin shyly handed him Baby and her eye and took two steps back, his intentions obvious. Obi-Wan looked down at the plush animal and back to his Padawan and smiled warmly before leading them to the armchair by the window and turning on the desk lamp.
"I see the patient needs surgery," he murmured quietly as Anakin climbed onto the armrest and peered over his little friend. "You're blocking my light."
-
Next it was Baby's left ear. Anakin was thirteen and made the now regretful decision to bring her along on his Gathering, smuggled beneath a spare blanket tucked inside his pack. He'd forgotten about her of course, too focused on the excitement of having found his very own Kyber crystal and flaunting his newly assembled and personalized lightsaber with his classmates. But one of his friends had said they were cold and Anakin was always generous so he lent them his spare blanket. But when he pulled the blanket out, Baby fell free and rolled onto the floor of the ship.
The group of children went from excited rambling to near silence to boisterous laughter in less than two seconds. Anakin was mortified. He dropped to his knees to grab Baby and put her away as fast as he could but his classmates were faster, suddenly throwing her back and forth, playing keep away and taunting him. One of his classmates held her by her soft ears and swung her in a circle over his head until she detached completely and hit the wall, landing pathetically on her side in front of him. By then the excitement had died down and his classmates were back to showing off their weapons and gossiping about their friends and eating all their snacks. Anakin quietly picked Baby up and before anyone could see him shoved her roughly back into his pack.
When he came back to his and Obi-Wan's shared quarters he dropped his brand new lightsaber on the table and silently walked into his room. He waited for the door to slide shut before he dug into his pack and pulled Baby out. Her fur was still soft but her head had a small hole where her ear had been. Anakin quickly tore through his pack to look for her ear, emptying it onto his floor and spreading everything apart. He shook his blanket wildly and even looked inside his pouch of snacks but her ear didn't turn up. His classmate must have thrown it somewhere on the ship.
He'd brought her home incomplete.
He looked at her resting on her side on the bed, the white stuffing puffing out from her missing ear, her eye sewn back on with light brown thread instead of black. Suddenly Anakin felt very angry. He picked up Baby and threw her as hard as he could onto the floor, even stomping on her twice before kicking her into his closet where junk went to disappear forever. He crossed his arms over his chest and sat on his bed and didn't think about his Gathering or his friends laughing at him or his Master asking him what was wrong when he got home.
After a few minutes of breathing heavily and swiping away angry tears before they fell he jumped from his bed and fell to his knees inside his closet before he picked Baby back up and crushed her into a fierce hug against his chest. He pressed his face into the soft fur at the back of her neck and cried quietly. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
-
Puberty strikes when Anakin is fourteen. Hormones and emotions and thoughts run rampant. Baby sits politely facing the wall every morning and every night. But she is still held and cuddled every night.
-
Anakin finally cleans his room when he is sixteen. Well. He makes his bed and stuffs everything that was on the floor into the closet. Baby, who had fallen under the bed again last week, is rescued and set on a new perch on the high shelf in the closet. She has blankets so she won't get cold, but now she can't see the sunlight stream in through the window with her mismatched button eyes, and she can barely hear whenever Anakin is there with what's left of her one floppy ear. Her red-brown fur no longer smells clean like the store or sweet like chocolate Name Day cake, but musty like a dark closet with too many dirty clothes and droid parts.
Baby waits patiently for Anakin to open the closet door, her felt heart jumps into her throat every time he has to put on his cloak or his boots. She can only see the top of his sandy blond head, and isn't that interesting? He wasn't quite that tall when he put her on her perch. But then her soft stuffing settles when the door closes and she continues to be patient.
-
Anakin rearranges his bedroom when he's seventeen. His window is open to air out the musty teenage boy smell and his closet is open so he can sort through old Jedi robes that no longer fit his broadening shoulders. Baby can just barely see a sliver of light through the clutter that has fallen on top of her; an overdue hardcover textbook from the library, and a crate of old droid parts.
When Anakin stands up he hits the top of his head on the shelf in the closet and everything tumbles onto him. Baby is grateful for the impromptu rescue but now half her body is flattened and one leg is twisted at an awkward angle. When Anakin looks down at the mess he notices Baby and immediately picks her up and hugs her tight. He squishes her soft body a bit to try to fluff her round shape back up but realizes she might just need some time to sit in the small patch of sunlight on his bed in order to feel herself again.
That night and every night after, Baby sleeps comfortably tucked in Anakin's arm. Her body did eventually puff back up but not to her original fullness, and her leg never completely recovered.
-
It's Anakin's nineteenth Name Day when he sneaks out of the temple and into a lower level club after dark. He's gone with a few of his classmates to celebrate with fruity drinks and greasy food. He knew Obi-Wan wanted to celebrate with him the same way he did every year, with a small chocolate cake before dinner and watching holo movies together, but Obi-Wan was going to be a bit late and his classmates really wanted to go out for drinks.
He comes home stumbling drunk and hungry. The club only had finger food and his friends didn't want to stop at Dex's Diner because they said it was in an unsavory part of the city. He finds the chocolate cake with it's single candle sitting in the center of the table and dips his finger into the frosting, messing up the writing he didn't even read before heading to his room, using the walls as support.
When his door slides open Obi-Wan is sitting on the edge of his bed holding Baby. He looks tired and disappointed, and maybe a little hurt. He stands up and moves to leave as soon as he sees Anakin, handing him Baby before he gets to the door.
"What are you doing in my room?" Anakin says as he takes her and flops himself backwards onto his bed.
I'm"Ah. Forgive me for being concerned when I came home to find my Padawan missing and no note. I thought we would spend your Name Day together. Where did you go?"
"My friends wanted to go out. I dunno what your problem is, I'm an adult. It's not like I have to give you a play by play of what I do and where I go."
Obi-Wan sighs loudly and shakes his head. "Anakin, might I remind you that you are still my Padawan, therefore you are still my charge, under my care and my instruction. It is unwise to go galavanting the city and drinking who knows what." When Anakin didn't respond, he added "Of the two adults in this room, which one has chocolate frosting on his upper lip? And which one is currently hugging an old stuffed animal?"
That struck a chord.
Anakin sits up so fast his face pales and he has to catch his balance as he wobbles in place. "I don't even like this stupid thing," he says casually. "In fact I've never liked it. I just pretended to like it to make you feel better about not knowing anything about me."
Obi-Wan crosses his arms over his chest and cocks his head to the side. For a split second his expression is hurt but he schools it before Anakin notices. "You are drunk and tired. Go to bed, Padawan, we will discuss your punishment in the morning."
Anakin doubles down when he sees that his words have no effect on his master. "I hate this stupid thing. You didn't even make an effort to get to know me. What would a ten year old even want with a stupid thing like this?" He rudely shoves past Obi-Wan and heads towards the kitchen, Baby clutched tightly in his right hand, and stops in front of the garbage chute, yanking it open and tossing her in. He turns around and sneers at Obi-Wan's look of exasperation.
"Just go to your room Anakin. I'm sure you will have quite a lot to think about in the morning."
Anakin just rolls his eyes and stomps his way back to his room, locking his door after it slides shut.
Obi-Wan wonders if Anakin is aware in his alcohol soaked mind that the temple garbage compactor is due to be switched on in two hours. He shrugs and heads to bed.
Anakin must learn sooner or later that there will always be consequences for one's words and actions.
-
Baby lies discarded on top of a pile of old smelly clothes. The garbage compactor is dark and there's a quiet hum in the distance. She waits patiently for Anakin to come and get her. He always rescues her every time she gets lost or hurt. He will come soon and rescue her from this smelly pit.
-
Anakin wakes up at noon with a pounding headache. He remembers a bit of what happened last night but not everything. He knows he was a jerk to Obi-Wan. He only wanted to spend time with him, why did he have to act like such a child? After a few minutes of stewing in his bad decisions Anakin finally decided it was time for some caf and painkillers. When he goes to the kitchen he sees the ruined cake still sitting on the table and the garbage chute still open. That's when he remembers everything.
He rushes to get dressed and put his boots on and dashes through the corridors of the temple until he finds the stairwell to the maintenance area and the hatch leading to the garbage compactor. He climbs inside and slides down the chute and lands on something hard and wet. He tears frantically through the slop and refuse, his boots slipping and squelching on rotten food and who knows what else. Baby has to be in here somewhere. But the more he searches for her the more he realizes that everything in his path has already been pulverized.
He loses his momentum when Baby doesn't turn up after fifteen minutes. He sits on top of a cube of trash and catches his breath, wincing at the rancid smell, and drops his head in his hands. After a few minutes of wallowing he searches for the emergency exit and quickly makes his way back to his quarters to shower. He waits to cry until he's in the privacy of his locked room. The tears start to fall as he mechanically redresses. He stops short when he turns around to climb back into bed and sees Baby sitting right on top of his pillow.
She is not pulverized or stained or smelly or gone. She's perfect and she's back in his arms again right where she belongs. He collapses onto his bed and breathes in her scent and is instantly reminded of the night she became his. She still smells like chocolate Name Day cake and her one shredded ear still hangs on and her perfect pink felt tongue isn't so pink and perfect anymore but she's still there with him and-
Obi-Wan must have gone down there and searched for her himself.
He's too ashamed of his behavior to go and thank him but he knows sooner or later he will have to face him. For now he will just lie in bed and hold Baby close. He can't risk letting her out of his sight again.
-
Anakin is twenty-one when Ahsoka meets Baby. She's supposed to be finishing an assignment that's due the next day but instead they're sitting on his floor going through his old junk in his closet as a way to pass the time until Obi-Wan comes back with takeout. He's wearing his old wireframe glasses that are too small for his face while taps away at a forgotten handheld video game while Ahsoka combs through a crate full of datachips, eager to pop one into her datapad and witness the utter adorableness that was nine year old Anakin. Her words.
She selects one and clicks through all the images and her 'aws' get progressively more exaggerated until suddenly her hand his covering her mouth and her eyes are shining as she looks back and forth from the screen to him. She floats the datapad over to him and he's immediately taken back to a specific moment in his childhood. He's nine years old, his Padawan's haircut is clearly fresh, indicated by the dusting of light blond hair on his shoulders. He's wearing beige Jedi robes and little brown boots and his hands are clasped shyly behind his back but his head is upturned to look bashfully at Senator, then Queen, Amidala. She's wearing plain handmaiden's clothes and her face is filthy, her long hair falling out of its intricate braid as she looks down at Anakin with a big bright smile, all teeth and flushed cheeks.
"You guys were literally destined to come back into each other's lives, look at this! And you were so adorable. I could just die," she gushes. Anakin flushes but passes the datapad back to Ahsoka without a word. Ahsoka continues clicking but stops again, probably on a similar image of baby-faced Anakin.
It's not.
Well, it is. But this time he's asleep and he's holding Baby tight to his chest with a subtle smile on his chocolate frosting mouth. She looks brand new. Obi-Wan must have snapped this the night of his Name Day. Anakin rolls his eyes and pushes the datapad away and fixes his attention on a different crate in the closet, clearly trying to distract Ahsoka from witnessing his intimate childhood memories but she's not having it.
"No way, Skyguy, I'm not letting this one go. I need a copy of this stat," she says as she presses her own datachip into the device. "That plushie is so cute. Do you still have it? I wonder what it looks like now. Can I see?"
Anakin sighs. He knows she's not going to let this go until he gives in. "Sh-It's under the bed. Just be careful, it's falling apart now."
Ahsoka digs Baby out from behind a strategically placed container and shrieks with delight. Baby has completely lost her hearing recently so she doesn't mind the high pitched noises, and her one remaining black button eye is barely hanging on. Her twisted leg is at quite an angle now so she has to sit carefully to not twist it further.
Ahsoka wonders briefly if Anakin's ever thought of having it restored.
"So what's it's name?" But that's the final straw and Anakin carefully snatches Baby away and places her on her perch in the closet. She only stays there for a few hours and thankfully is placed gently back on his bed where she belongs after Ahsoka has gone to her own quarters for the night.
Baby is starting to get a bit sleepy now that Anakin is an adult but she knows he still loves her dearly so she'll be his friend for as long as he still needs her.
-
Anakin is twenty-three when Padmé meets Baby. He'd forgotten that Baby was tucked away in his pack under a spare blanket. He drops his pack on the floor inside their bedroom in the penthouse, eager to wash away the dirt and sweat from his recent mission. He was only gone for two weeks but he still felt like he needed to bring her along.
When he steps out of the fresher and back into the bedroom he sees Padmé sitting on their bed, his pack open next to her, and Baby held delicately in her hands. She presses her face into the top of Baby's head and breathes deep and suddenly her lips quiver and her eyes are wet and she breathes in a second time, a third, a fourth. Baby smells like Anakin, like his skin and his clothes and cologne. She smells like engine oil and chocolate cake. She looks like she has been his friend her whole life. Her soft red-brown fur has been loved off at the back of her neck, as if that spot is pet the most. She is blind and deaf with only a few scraps of light brown thread remaining where her black button eyes and long floppy ears once were. Her perfect pink felt tongue is gone and her twisted leg rests at a very odd angle. She's worn in all the right places that a lonely child loves.
Padmé knows she's his because she has her own little friend that she loved into oblivion too. She sets Baby down and walks over to the closet as Anakin stares dumbly at her from the door. He looks nervous, like he thinks she might judge him for his childish indulgence. But all she does is bring out a round box from the back of the closet and pull out Bean and hand her to Anakin. Bean, in her day, was a soft little Ewok with light brown fur and a pink lace dress. Her fur is mostly gone too and her dress is tattered and white. She's missing one leg and her neck is quite loose but when Anakin smells the top of her head she smells just like Padmé.
When they lie in bed that night they hold each other and their little friends tight.
Anakin's sure they'll feel silly and childish about this in the morning but in the meantime this is the best rest Bean and Baby have had in years.