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“Well, goodnight then, Sid,” Dewey said from the doorway, waving awkwardly at her.
Sidney raised an eyebrow, smiling. “Night, Dewey.”
Tatum rolled her eyes and sighed loudly.
“Sweet dr-”
Tatum threw a pillow at him, grumbling, “Go away, Dewey-boy! Let us sleep already!”
Sidney laughed behind a hand as Dewey stalked off, rubbing his forehead where the pillow had hit him. Tatum slid off her bed to close the door behind him. Once it had shut, she flopped dramatically back onto her own bed, making a face at Sidney.
“I think he likes you, Sid. Gross,” Tatum fake-gagged, then grinned at Sidney.
“What, am I really that unattractive?” Sidney teased, though part of her wondered if that was what her friend had meant, instead of it being weird that Tatum’s older brother might like her.
“Oh, shut up, you know you’re gorgeous,” Tatum said as if it were nothing, looking away from Sidney while she undid her braids from the day.
“You flatter me,” Sidney laughed, hugging one of Tatum’s pillows to her chest. She silently watched Tatum’s nimble fingers comb through her golden hair, then toss her two hair ties haphazardly onto her dresser.
“No,” Tatum said finally, turning around with an excited sigh, bouncing once on her bed before eyeing Sidney with a smirk. “But I’ve seen the way a certain someone’s been staring at you in class,” she singsonged, leaning forward to poke Sidney’s cheek with her finger.
“What?” Sidney sputtered, swatting away her friend’s hand. A blush rose to her cheeks. “You can’t be serious, Tatum.”
Tatum raised both her eyebrows at Sidney, not saying a word.
Sidney pouted, tossing her pillow halfheartedly at Tatum, who laughed and flung it away. “Tatum, c’mon, who?”
Tatum rolled her eyes. “Don’t be stupid, Sid. Who else other than our very own Billy Loomis?”
“Billy? Really?” Sidney perked up. She had thought Billy was cute for a while, but something just didn’t sit right with her about him. Besides, she felt… weird about the whole scenario.
“And Randy, duh, but he’s not cute, so don’t even think about it,” Tatum added hastily, crossing her arms as a warning.
An odd feeling crept up Sidney’s chest, and she laughed nervously. “I swear I would never, Tatum.”
Tatum locked eyes with Sidney intensely. Sidney stared back, raising an eyebrow to keep her cool. She swallowed down the strange emotion she was feeling.
None of them spoke. They just sat in the sound of the other breathing for a little while.
“Promise me you’ll go out with Billy,” Tatum said suddenly, grabbing Sidney’s knees with her palms.
Sidney laughed awkwardly, leaning forward. “Why? What do you get out of it, huh?”
Tatum rolled her eyes, leaning back again. Her cheeks were red. From her excitement, Sidney supposed. “‘Cause I get to see you happy, Sid. You’ve been pining after him for eons. Don’t think I don’t notice you staring at him when you think he isn’t looking. And he likes you, that much is obvious. Go get him already!” Tatum grinned widely.
“Fine, fine, okay, I’ll go out with him!” Sidney laughed. She couldn’t say no to Tatum.
Tatum’s smile grew impossibly wider. “Good,” she said. “Now tell me all about Billy.”
The two talked through the night, Tatum gushing about Sidney’s crush on Billy while Sidney teased Tatum about Gus and Johnny and Tyler and Hugh.
Tatum switched off a couple of lights, the two settling into their beds comfortably while their voices dipped softer and lower.
Sidney felt wound-up somehow, intense. In the dim light, she found the courage she had been hoping for earlier.
“D’you ever think about, y’know… girls?”
Sidney heard Tatum turn her head towards her. The singular foot between their two beds felt constricting.
“In what way?” Tatum’s words were short, too-casual. Sidney swallowed down the weird feeling building in her chest, the action sounding deafening in the quiet.
“Y’know,” Sidney tried again, forcing her voice to be somewhat normal. “Like… like how we think about boys. Do you ever… do you ever think about girls?”
Sidney stared resolutely at the Wonder Woman poster Tatum had on the wall opposite. Her hands were on her hips and she stared into the distance, a triumphant look upon her face.
“I think that if we stay up any later, we’ll both have eye bags and Billy will think you’re some kind of vampire,” Tatum said matter-of-factly, and the weird feeling in Sidney’s chest doubled. She turned her head for a moment to look at Tatum, nodding carefully.
“Yeah. Yeah, of course,” she smiled, though it didn’t reach her eyes. Sidney forced a yawn, turning her back to Tatum and pulling the covers up higher.
Tatum switched off the light with a soft click, and Sidney heard her sheets rustle as she settled into bed.
Sidney counted the minutes in her head, lying as still as she possibly could under the covers. Her heart hammered in her ears. What would she have even done if Tatum had said yes? It’s not like Sidney felt like... that, she was just… curious, that was it.
She closed her eyes, trying to get rid of the unsettling feeling in her chest.
“Sid?” Tatum whispered from a foot away.
Sidney’s gut told her to shut up and be still. She followed its instructions.
A soft sigh came from the other bed.
“I do,” the other girl admitted, so quiet that Sidney had to shut her eyes to even focus on it. “I do.”
A year later, and they’ve both gotten several months into their respective relationships: Sidney’s with Billy and Tatum’s got Johnny.
“And then he does this,” Tatum giggled, squeezing Sidney’s clothed hips harshly under her hands and pressing her body flat to her friend’s, exhaling obscenely on the bare skin of Sidney’s neck. “‘Oh, Tatum, you’re so sexy,’” Tatum mocked playfully.
Sidney laughed breathily, holding Tatum up by her shoulders. “God, that’s… something,” she finished, and Tatum rolled off her easily, laughing along with her.
The two friends lay on Sidney’s bed, staring at the perfectly painted ceiling.
“Show me how Billy does it,” Tatum said breezily, turning to face Sidney so her breath caressed her friend’s face.
“Okay.”
Sidney shifted so that she was facing Tatum, trailing a finger up Tatum’s arm until her hand rested on her warm face. “He says my name like a prayer. ‘Sidney.’” She caressed Tatum’s cheek with her thumb with its chipped white nail polish, leaning forward to whisper just before her lips, “My god, you’re so beautiful.”
Tatum’s heart jackrabbited in her chest. This, she could pretend, was Sidney telling her how beautiful she was, instead of Sidney thinking of Billy thinking of Sidney.
Sidney leaned back then, repeating softly, “so beautiful… Um, ‘you’re so beautiful, Sidney.’”
Tatum, without thinking, as if it were simple, leaned forward and pressed her lips to Sidney’s. It was a peck, just Tatum’s lip gloss lips against Sidney’s chapstick ones.
Sidney stared at her for a moment before shaking her head minutely. “Billy kisses me more like this,” she said quietly, cheeks red, before swinging her leg over Tatum’s and fitting their mouths together firmly.
Tatum found herself holding onto Sidney’s waist as Sidney trailed insistent kisses down the side of her neck and her throat.
“Sid-” she breathed heavily, and a loud knock came at the door.
Tatum pushed Sidney off of her, fixing her hair quickly while Sidney stood, her hands shoved deep in her pockets and her face red.
“Sidney, Billy’s at the door for you, dear,” Sidney’s mother Maureen called from behind the two doors used to keep Sidney’s parents at bay. “And your dad’s got a new assignment for work, he’ll be back by the end of the week. I’m going to go run some errands.”
Sidney avoided Tatum’s gaze. “Thanks, Mom,” she said, just a bit too loud to sound normal. At least to Tatum.
Tatum heard Maureen’s heels click-clack away in silence.
“Well,” she said, exhaling and smiling a bit too brightly, “I’ll go call Johnny up, then. Wish he kissed as good as Billy kisses you,” she lamented, laughing to herself as she gathered up her things.
Sidney stayed where she was, her thumb pressed to her lip in thought.
“I’ll see you tomorrow at school,” Tatum said lamely, standing opposite Sidney.
“Yeah,” Sidney said, nodding absently. She closed her closet door and opened her bedroom door, glancing up at Tatum and forcing a small smile. “We’re okay, Tatum. I promise.”
Tatum bit her lip before side-hugging Sidney awkwardly, rushing out the door.
Of all her luck, she had to run into Billy outside Sidney’s room.
“Oh,” she gasped, clutching her jacket tightly. “Sorry.”
Billy clenched his jaw, raising a singular eyebrow at her. “Not a problem,” he said in that hair-raising way of his.
Tatum sidled past him, half-waving at the two of them quickly. “O-kay. See ya, Sid.”
“Bye, Tatum,” Sidney called from the doorway. Tatum glanced over her shoulder. Sidney’s eyes were soft, softer than they were before.
Tatum smiled.
The next year, Sidney sobbed into Tatum’s arms for three hours straight and after every trial and testimony.
“I’ve got you,” she would say, holding her friend tightly and kissing the top of her head. “It’ll be okay.”
They stopped demonstrating after that.
Sidney didn’t like to be touched anymore. She avoided anything further than holding hands with Billy like the plague. Besides, Tatum had been busy dating Stu Macher, of all people, so she wasn’t exactly an option.
The two were insufferable, in Sidney’s initial opinion. She didn’t quite know what Tatum saw in him. He was full of himself, goofed off, and carried Tatum around like a piece of property at times. Though Sidney supposed Tatum could handle herself. Stu had enough sense to shut up when Tatum told him to.
Despite all that, things were good that year. Billy was patient with Sidney. Randy pined after her from a distance. She spent time at Tatum’s house when her dad went out of town for work. Although Stu could be a bit of a jerk, Sidney was content with their little friend group.
And then Casey Becker and Steve Orth were brutally murdered, and Sidney and Tatum went to a party, and nothing was ever the same.
Sidney stared back at a haunted reflection of herself. In the harsh bathroom lighting, she looked worn-out, tired.
Each time she looked in the mirror, all she could see in her expression was Stu laughing at her, wrestling her, his body spasming as he died; Billy telling her he loved her, caressing her face with his fake-bloodied hands, holding a knife to her throat. She saw Tatum hanging immobile from the garage door, Tatum in the hospital bed crying over her one arm, Tatum waking up screaming after a nightmare.
But she didn’t feel. She just felt hollow, as if maybe all of those things had happened to someone else.
Tatum’s concerned voice found its way to her through the bathroom door. “Sid? You’re takin’ a real long time in there, you alright?”
Sidney couldn’t find a voice within her to respond. Instead she gripped the sides of the sink tightly, as if it were something to anchor her.
“Sidney Prescott, if you don’t open that door right now, I’m busting it down,” Tatum said a bit louder, and Sidney numbly reached out one hand and twisted the knob.
The door opened quickly, Tatum half-falling through the doorway. Her frantic expression wasn’t soothed by Sidney’s.
“Sid, c’mere,” she said gently, holding out her singular arm, and Sidney let herself be held by her best friend.
“I hate feeling like this,” she mumbled into Tatum’s shoulder, and Tatum pet her hair with her hand.
“I know,” she said softly, and then exhaled, releasing the hug and looking into Sidney’s eyes. “C’mon, I’ll go make us some tea, okay? It’s not good to dwell on anything today. Even though I’d like to dig up those bastards just to spit on them.”
Sidney snorted back a laugh despite what she felt, and Tatum smiled. She grabbed her hand and led the two of them out of the bathroom and to the kitchen.
“You sure you don’t want any-”
“I don’t need any help!” Tatum cut her off quickly, flashing her a smile.
Sidney leaned on the counter as she watched Tatum grab the cups and put the kettle on. Watching Tatum work expertly around Sidney’s kitchen made her feel some strange sort of warmth.
“I’m putting on The Bangles,” Tatum said cheerily, about a half second before she pressed play on Sidney’s CD player.
“You know they’re my favorite,” Sidney sighed after the introduction to ‘Manic Monday’ began.
By the time the kettle had boiled, she had begun to feel a bit more like herself. She always did when she was with Tatum. Tatum prepared the two of them Jasmine tea in their favorite mugs: for Tatum, a baby blue winter wonderland scene; for Sidney, a giraffe-shaped mug.
Tatum leaned over the counter with Sidney, handing her the tea. Sidney wrapped her hands around the mug, sighing softly when the warmth seeped into her body.
“Y’know,” Tatum said quietly, “Last year, when I was… in the garage door. Before I passed out… all I could think about was you, Sidney. All I could think about was whether you’d make it out or not,” Tatum sniffed, turning her head away from Sidney and wiping her eyes with her hand.
Sidney placed a hand on Tatum’s shoulder, remembering how she’d cried from relief when Tatum had been found with a pulse.
“We’re here, Tatum,” Sidney reminded her gently. “We both made it.”
Tatum nodded silently for a long moment before cracking a grin. “My right arm sure didn’t.”
Sidney and Tatum burst out laughing in such a way that only survivors of that tragedy could laugh at jokes like that.
“You’re horrible,” Sidney said, faux-seriously in between their laughter, and Tatum laughed again, wiping away the tears from her eyes.
Sidney smiled, hugging her friend tightly before moving to grab the jar of honey from where it was just slightly out of reach. In doing so, she knocked over her giraffe mug, spilling her tea all over the countertop.
“Aw, damn, my tea,” she mourned, going to pick up the pieces of her broken mug.
“Your mug, though!” Tatum gestured, grabbing a cloth out of the drawer to dry the countertop.
Sidney hissed as a shard of the ceramic sliced her hand, drawing blood. “Well, it just cut me, so I guess I’m not too torn up about it.”
Tatum, who had been poised to clean up the spill, turned to Sidney. “Let me see that,” she said, inspecting Sidney’s hand under her stare. “Looks painful,” she remarked, running the cloth under the water faucet behind them.
“Eh, it’s not too bad,” Sidney lied, watching the blood pool in her hand.
Tatum scoffed, motioning for Sidney to hold her hand out for her. “Give me your hand.”
“I’m not one to complain, but… you aren’t the most well-known for your medical skills,” Sidney sniffled, laughing despite the pain in her hand. She gave Tatum her hand anyway.
Tatum snorted softly, dabbing at Sidney’s cut with the damp cloth. “Yeah, but don't you think it’s better to be taken care of by someone who loves you?”
Sidney’s eyelashes fluttered down as she turned her head to watch Tatum. She had said it so casually, so simply, that it didn’t feel out of place at all. She thought back on all the moments they’d had together, before all of this. Their conversations in the dark. How when she’d thought Tatum was dead, it had felt like her whole world had come crumbling down around her.
Tatum was staring intently at Sidney’s hand, dabbing away blood that wasn’t there anymore. Her cheeks were red, her lip caught between her teeth.
“That’s sort of… what I was trying to get at before,” Tatum continued awkwardly.
“I… I love you too,” Sidney replied, a slight laugh escaping her mouth as she said so.
“Really?” Tatum asked, looking up to meet Sidney’s eyes. “Like, you love me, romantically?”
Sidney laughed softly, taking the cloth out of Tatum’s hand and giving her her uninjured hand to hold instead. “Yeah, I do. What, are you surprised?”
Tatum blushed, then rolled her eyes, squeezing Sidney’s hand. “Of course not,” she scoffed playfully. “Well. Yeah, I was at first.”
Sidney raised an eyebrow, a soft smile gracing her face. “Well, I was. For way too long,” she admitted.
“Well, then I guess we have all the time in the world to make up for it, then,” Tatum breathed.
Sidney was very aware of how close they were to each other. She could smell the Jasmine tea on her breath and the lavender conditioner she used.
The urge to press her lips to Tatum’s was practically overwhelming. After so many years of the two of them in denial, dating those assholes… and Tatum was right here in front of her, perfect and alive and her best friend and she wanted her to be more.
“Can I kiss you, Tatum?” Sidney asked. “A real kiss. Not like how we used to. No more experiments, just… us.”
Sidney stroked her thumb across Tatum’s hand and watched the blush spread on Tatum’s cheeks.
“Yes. Yeah, Sid, I really want to kiss you, for real,” Tatum smiled.
Sidney would never tire of Tatum’s smiles.
“You’re beautiful.”
She leaned down minutely, Tatum meeting her halfway. The kiss was soft, sweet, everything she’d ever wanted. Sidney felt as though in this moment, she could be content with the two of them, in this kitchen, forever.
Tatum squeezed her hand once, and Sidney squeezed back.
“God, that was something,” Sidney exhaled as they drew apart. Their eyes met, recalling the last time Sidney had said that, and laughed in unison.
“I sure hope it was more than something,” Tatum joked, and Sidney nudged her, smiling.
“Of course it was, Tatum. It was amazing.”
Tatum grinned then, bright-eyed, and leaned in to kiss Sidney on the lips quickly. “Now let’s get you a Band-Aid before you bleed all over.”