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The first thing Ghostinnit felt was cold.
He could not feel the warmth radiating from the lave wall or the near unbearable hot obsidian under his palm. No, all he could feel was a freezing coldness that went deeper than skin. A frostbite that would never go away.
The first thing Ghostinnit saw was Tommys corpse.
The body was covered in blood and bruises. Obvious tear tracks on his face while his eyes were blank and staring into nothing. Ghostinnit felt like he was seeing something he wasn’t supposed to, yet he didn’t look away. It didn’t feel real that Tommy could be dead in any way, but him starring at the dead boy right now proved it was definitely real.
The first thing Ghostinnit heard was his abusers voice.
The abuser who had taken all three of Tommys canon lives. The abuser who exiled Tommy. The abuser who destroyed the things that belonged to Tommy. The abuser who left as many mental bruises as physical on Tommy. The abuser that made Tommy built the tower. The abuser that Ghostinnit was now stuck in a cell with.
Ghostinnit wanted to cry and scream for help. Ghostinnit wanted to block out his voice. Ghostinnit wanted him to stay away. But no matter what the ghost wanted, Dream was the one in control.
Dream would look down at his terrified form with a glint of amusement in his eyes. Explaining in excruciating detail what Ghostinnits fate was and laugh at his fear.
Ghostinnit learned early that his existence would be short lived no matter if he liked it or not. Though he still desperately wished it was longer. Long enough so he could at least experience existence outside the cell.
Unfortunately, Ghostinnit was just as unlucky as Tommy.
•
A simple fact about life in XDs land was that a person and their ghost couldn’t exist simultaneously.
When a person died their ghost came into existence. Ghosts didn’t die but faded away, to where? Nobody but them knew. So to resurrect someone, you would need to force their ghost into the afterlife.
Ghostinnit knew this full well, yet he couldn’t help but feel bitter at how unfair it felt.
While Tommy was once again in the living world, Ghostinnit was now trapped in the afterlife.
A limbo of a never ending void of darkness that he could walk in for forever. There were no sounds of footsteps while he walked nor was there an echo in his voice when he talked, the infinite emptiness having no walls or floor.
Ghostinnit wasn’t dead, and would have never died, yet he was here. He was suppose to fade away and it was stolen from him.
Stolen from him by the man who had stolen so much from so many people.
A pool of self pity that Ghostinnit lets himself drown in as a year goes by.
•
It’s funny how aware of time you are while in limbo.
You could a person who didn’t know what day of the week it was half of the time yet know exactly how many months you’ve been dead.
It’s just something you’re hyper aware of. Something you just can’t ignore even if you want to. Maybe it was a gods idea of a sick joke, or maybe some sort of curse on humanity.
Not only that but time passes differently in limbo.
One day is one month in limbo. Could you believe it? You only have to be dead for twelve days and it would be a year for you. One year filled with nothing but loneliness and misery.
Ghostinnit didn’t know whether to laugh or cry when two years had gone by.
•
Ghostinnit never thought death would be so lonely.
Even though he didn’t believe in heaven or hell, he believed you wouldn’t be lonely. That you would be around other people that have died.
Turns out death wasn’t so kind.
The loneliness was tearing him apart inside. He just wanted to talk to someone, anyone, at this point. The unchanging darkness mocking him even when he closed his eyes.
Ghostinnit wondered what god he had to pray and beg for company to as the third year came and went.
•
He wondered what it was like to not exist.
Not in the sense of being dead, but to just never be. To have it like before Tommy died or that limbo didn’t exist.
When you exist you can’t stop existing, but Ghostinnit wished he could. That he could end himself forever without some sort of afterlife.
Death kept on being painful. It would keep tormenting you and keep you suffering forever. A personal hell designed just for you. A torture you couldn’t escape from.
You just couldn’t escape death with death, thought Ghostinnit wished you could by the fourth year.
•
It’s been four and a half years.
Four and a half years since his existence was cut short.
Four and a half years of suffering.
Ghostinnit was just laying. He wanted to sleep but couldn’t. He wanted to disappear but couldn’t.
But it seemed whatever god he had angered decided to give him some mercy.
For there was a hand in his hair, softly running their fingers through his hair. Ghostinnit couldn’t bring himself to care who it was, just letting himself indulge in the small amount of comfort he’d been yearning for years.
Whoever it was moved Ghostinnits head into their lap, letting their fingers continue to mess with his hair. He was so tired. He didn’t want to open his eyes, yet he does and looks up at the stranger.
“Hello... Ghostinnit?” The familiar soft voice of Ghostbur said “It’s really nice to meet you”
Ghostinnit couldn’t help himself, he started crying. The tears burning his cheeks and giving of a low sizzling. He didn’t know why. Was it because Ghostbur was also stuck in this hell? Was it because he finally wasn’t alone? Was it because he had to see the shell of Wilbur? But wasn’t Ghostinnit a shell of Tommy?
Whatever the reason he started crying was, Ghostbur hugging him was the comfort he needed. The familiar feeling of the older ghost making Ghostinnit cry harder.
“It’s gonna be okay” Ghostbur whispered.
And Ghostinnit couldn’t help but to believe him.