Chapter Text
Keeping track of time while you were in hyperspace could get a little fuzzy, especially when one was in there for days at a time. And more often these days, Kanan found himself traveling that way to avoid Imperial patrols.
This past time they’d spent well over a week in hyperspace, and everyone was ready to get off the ship. The Submarine was big enough that they had their own personal space, but frankly, Kanan wanted some fresh air– and more importantly, fresh food. And he wasn’t the only one, either.
So when they came out above Lothal, it was pretty clear that everyone was going with him to pick up supplies. As they moved towards the exit of the Submarine, which Kasmir had landed several miles away from the nearest town, Jalath, Kanan cautioned them, “Remember, we’ve got to be subtle, everyone. That means no swiping things from Imperials–” he pointed at Ezra– “no picking fights–” next, Kasmir– “and Okadiah, keep the flirting to a minimum.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” the older man said innocently.
“What if we told Chenni that?” Ezra suggested with a slight grin, nudging Jyn. The girl covered a grin, and Okadiah gave them a look of exaggerated offense.
“Chenni and I are merely friends. We bond over dealing with young whippersnappers who have zero respect for us.”
“Sure you do,” Kanan said, keying the button to let down the ramp. As it lowered, his eyes widened. The usually golden plains of Lothal were covered in a layer of snow, the setting sun glinting off of it.
“Whoa,” Ezra breathed. “It snowed! It hasn’t snowed here in ages!” He promptly dashed out into the snow and dropped backwards into it.
“Huh,” Kanan said, staring around. “I’m starting to think I lost track of time more than I thought. What’s the date?”
Kasmir handed him the datapad with the shopping list on it, and Kanan tapped a few buttons on it, queuing up the display with the time and date on it. “Holy kriff, it’s almost Life Day.”
“Life Day?” Jyn said, frowning. All eyes, except for Ezra who was busily making a snow angel, moved to her.
“Kid,” Kasmir said, his gaze concerned, “you do know what Life Day is, right?”
“Maybe?” Jyn said, biting her lip. “It’s a winter holiday with gifts or something, right?”
Ezra had hopped to his feet at some point, and he came over as Jyn was speaking. “Wait– you’ve never celebrated Life Day?” he demanded, his expression horrified. “How?”
“I might have when I was little, but I don’t remember very well,” Jyn admitted. “And Saw wasn’t very big on celebrating holidays or anything. He said it could wait until after the Empire was defeated.”
Making a mental note to find out when Jyn’s birthday was, Kanan said, “Well, we’re not exactly fans of that thought process. Life Day is a Wookie holiday that the rest of the galaxy kind of latched onto– not that it’s technically legal now. The Empire forbids celebrating it, but there are still those who do.”
“My parents used to celebrate when I was little,” Ezra said. “But I didn’t remember until we went to Kashyyyk a couple years ago, and we saw the Wookies celebrating.”
Nodding, Kasmir said, “We took two things out of that trip– a holiday full of traditions that promote joy and peace, and the fact that Ezra nearly died like seven times.”
“And I don’t think you understand quite how many times that was,” Kanan said, rubbing his forehead with a grimace as he thought back. “He nearly DIED, four times– and then three more times after that.”
Looking a little too amused by his words, Jyn said, “I get it.”
“Uh-huh. Well, we've kind of started a tradition of celebrating,” Kanan explained. “Meaning we put up Life Day orbs, eat some traditional foods, including some traditions we came up with ourselves, and–”
“Presents!!” Ezra said, bouncing up and down on his heels with excitement.
“Presents,” Kanan acknowledged with a slight grin. “Although some people might say the real gift is the time you get to spend with the people you love, and the valuable lessons the holiday teaches–”
“But those people would be wrong,” Kasmir finished, grinning at Ezra, who grinned back. “Never get less mercenary, kid.”
Kanan had to hold back a grin, and saw Jyn doing the same. “What do you think?” he asked her. “Feel like celebrating?”
She hesitated for a moment, then nodded. “Why not? It could be fun.”
“It definitely will be,” Ezra promised, his eyes gleaming with excitement. “Kanan makes all these cookies from a bunch of different planets– they’re recipes he’s collected over the years– and we decorate the Submarine with Life Day orbs–”
“Take it easy, kiddo,” Kanan said, giving him an amused look. “First things first, we’re doing a supply run. Once we’re done there, we’ll go shopping for Life Day stuff.”
Ezra’s grin was blinding, and didn’t abate as they prepared for the supply run, heading across the prairie and into town. Snow crunching underfoot the whole way, the air was cold with a light breeze. Kanan caught Ezra looking up at the cloudy sky, and raised an eyebrow at him. “Looking for something?”
“Yeah, more snow,” Ezra said, squinting at the clouds. “Do you think it’ll snow some more?”
Shrugging, Kanan said, “I wouldn’t bet on it– but who knows? It’s Life Day, after all.”
The streets were fairly empty when they reached the town, and they split up and made their purchases with ease. Kanan finished first, and caught up with Kasmir and Okadiah quickly.
Nodding at where Jyn and Ezra were standing at a stall, Kasmir remarked, “I think the mini kid’s excitement is catching. She’s looking forward to this, I think.”
Kanan felt a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he watched the two kids. Ezra was chattering to Jyn excitedly as they waited, and Jyn was listening with patient amusement. “Then we’d better make it good,” he said. “This is her first proper Life Day in years, after all. She deserves something amazing.”
Snorting in amusement, Kasmir said, “The things you’d do for these kids.”
“And you’re telling me you don’t want to try and make this the best Life Day we possibly can for them?” Kanan challenged.
“You’ve got me there,” Kasmir admitted. “Alright, what’s the plan?”
“The plan for what?” Jyn asked– she and Ezra had finished up at the stall, and had come over to hear Kasmir’s last words.
“Life Day,” Kanan said. “We’ll leave the supplies with one of the vendors for now– we’ve got to go get some things to celebrate.”
“What sort of things?” Jyn asked with a frown. “And where are we supposed to get them? Isn’t celebrating Life Day outlawed by the Empire?”
Kanan found himself grinning slightly. “Oh, it is,” he said. “But when have you known me to obey anything the Empire says? There’s a black market a few blocks away that sells what we need.”
“Lothal has a Life Day black market?” Jyn said, lifting an eyebrow.
“Hey, it’s my home planet,” Ezra pointed out with an excited smile. “What do you expect?”
“Fair point,” Jyn said with a matching smile, albeit smaller.
“It only runs for a few hours every night, though, so we’d better get going,” Kanan said, glancing up at the sky where the moons were slowly starting to rise– the sun had long since set. “Follow me.”
They left the supplies with one of the stall owners for a few credits, and headed down the street. It didn’t take long before Kanan could hear the sounds of voices, and the group turned a corner to find a large warehouse, a few people standing at the doors like guards. One man stepped forward at the sight of them, looking wary at their approach.
Kanan moved to meet him, and recognition flared in the man’s gaze. “Jarrus,” he said, giving Kanan a nod.
“Tiernan,” Kanan said, returning the gesture. “How’s the wife?”
“She’s doing well,” Tiernan said with a smile. “I assume they’re all with you?” When Kanan nodded, he waved to the door, saying, “Head on in.”
“Thanks.” Kanan moved past him, the others on his heels, and they stepped through the doorway.
Inside was a wide, open space, filled with various tables and well over a few hundred beings, all browsing and talking. Next to him, Jyn let out a quiet noise. “There’s so much here,” she said quietly. “And the Empire hasn’t shut this down?”
“It’s a pretty well kept secret,” Kanan said. “Even some of those who aren’t ready for full rebellion will come here sometimes.” Turning to the group, he said, “Okay, we’re gonna divide and conquer here. Ezra, Jyn, go pick out some more Life Day orbs– you each get one, okay?” They both nodded, and Kanan turned to Kasmir. “You’re on ingredient duty for the food. You know what to get, right?”
“Have a little faith, kid,” Kasmir said with a falsely wounded expression. “I know what I’m doing.”
“Good. Don’t call me kid. Okadiah, you’re with Kasmir, and I also want you to get the stuff for hot chocolate. Try not to spend too long at Chenni’s table, please.”
Okadiah ignored him, to no one’s surprise, and Ezra asked, “What are you gonna do?”
“Life Day is not a time for asking questions,” Kanan said, handing him and Jyn a few credits. “Go pick out something nice, and bring me back one, too. We’ll meet back here in an hour, understand?”
“Yes, sir!” Ezra chirped, already dragging Jyn after him, Kasmir and Okadiah following suit. They were swallowed by the crowd in seconds, and Kanan took off with his own mission. He had Life Day presents to pick out.
Kasmir and Okadiah were fairly easy to shop for– he found a bottle of a specific Lothalian liquor for Kasmir, then in a fit of humor, went over to Chenni’s stall to pick out something for Okadiah. The older woman eyed him in amusement as he chose a blanket for the older man, then spent a few minutes browsing. “Shopping for the little ones?” she asked.
Kanan followed her gaze to where Jyn and Ezra were a few tables away, looking at a selection of sparkling Life Day Orbs with critical eyes. “It’s Jyn’s first Life Day with us– her first in a while, by the sounds of it. I want it to be special.”
Chenni gave him an approving nod. “You’re a good father, young man, taking care of them like that. They’re lucky to have you.”
“Oh, I’m not–” Kanan started, but Chenni’s attention had already been pulled away by one of the other customers, and she moved to help them, leaving Kanan slightly caught off guard by her comment.
Father. He let the word linger in his mind, considering it. He knew he wasn’t Jyn or Ezra’s actual father, of course. But there were days, times Ezra would perfect some part of his training or Jyn would have the bravery to open up to him a little more, that Kanan just felt so kriffing proud of them. And he knew there was nothing he wouldn’t do to protect them.
So maybe their version of family wasn’t normal. But Kanan loved it anyway.
However, it was currently slightly inconvenient, because he had no idea what to get the kids for Life Day.
He knew what he didn’t want, that was easy enough to figure out. He didn’t want something utilitarian, something that would help them in their fight against the Empire. What Kanan wanted to get them was something that would make their eyes light up with joy, something that made them happy. For just one day, he wanted them to be able to be kids, not spies and soldiers.
They deserved a much better childhood, he thought with a pang– the one gift he couldn’t give them. But he would do his best.
Ironically, since he had no idea what a normal childhood looked like. Kanan felt irritation knot in his chest as he strolled past the tables, browsing. The Jedi had celebrated Life Day, usually with hot drinks, songs and maybe watching a holofilm or something. Gifts had never really been part of the equation– collecting material objects wasn’t something the Jedi Order encouraged, which was one habit Kanan had kept. So now he had to choose presents for two kids with zero prior experience, and he really, really needed to get it right.
He was in the middle of browsing a table full of toys when he heard a familiar voice. Kanan’s head jerked up at the sound, his eyes searching for the green-skinned Twi’lek woman he knew he’d find somewhere nearby.
Sure enough, Hera was talking to a Rodian at his table nearby, examining some of his wares. Unable to hold back a smile, Kanan moved forward smoothly, coming to a stop by her side. “Finding something nice?” he asked in a low voice.
Hera jerked around, her eyes going wide in shock at the sight of him. Seconds later, her expression settled into soft amusement. “Kanan.”
“Hera,” Kana said, savoring the sound of her saying his name. Grinning at her, he said, “You miss me?”
Instead of responding, Hera frowned at him. “How are you?”
For a moment, Kanan had no idea what she was talking about, or why– and then he remembered the last time they’d met, he’d been stabbed. “I’m fine,” he assured her. “Good to hear you’re worrying about me, though.”
Hera rolled her eyes, although Kanan caught a slight sparkle of amusement in them. “Well, what brings you to Lothal?”
“Just passing through,” Kanan said, which wasn’t quite a lie. “Thought I’d drop in, find something nice for myself while I was here. You?”
“Picking up a few things,” Hera said, gesturing to the shopping bag slung over her shoulder. “It’s Life Day tomorrow, after all. Thought it would be nice to celebrate in some way.”
“Always the rebel,” Kanan joked.
Giving him a wry smile, Hera said, “Something like that. Do you celebrate?”
“What, celebrate a holiday the Empire has forbidden?” Kanan gave her a mock horrified look. “Does that really sound like me?”
“Knowing some of the places I’ve found you, nothing would surprise me at this point,” Hera said, and Kanan chuckled.
“Fair enough. Yeah, I celebrate. I’m here attempting a little gift shopping– I haven’t picked out anything for you yet, but don’t worry, I have a few ideas.” He shot her a wink.
Looking unimpressed, Hera said, “Very kind, but you don’t have to get me anything. Who are you shopping for?”
“Crew members,” Kanansaid evasively. “Just having a little trouble figuring something out.” He spotted a smile tugging at the corner of Hera’s mouth, and lifted an eyebrow at her. “What?”
“Nothing,” she said. “Just… you try so hard to pretend you don’t care about people, and yet here you are, struggling through gift shopping for your crew mates. Sounds like someone who cares to me.”
Kanan opened his mouth to protest, but Hera lifted her eyebrow in a “go ahead, contradict me” expression. And somehow, Kanan couldn’t bring himself to. Shrugging, he said, “Maybe you’ve rubbed off on me a little.”
“Glad someone can be a good influence on you,” she said, her voice teasing, and Kanan felt himself grinning.
“Couldn’t have chosen a better one myself.”
“Uh-huh, I’m sure.” Glancing around, Hera said, “I’d better get going– my crew is waiting, and we’re on a schedule. Besides, hanging around Lothal isn’t always the best idea for me.”
“Oh, I’m aware,” Kanan said, lifting an eyebrow. “I’ve seen the wanted posters– beautiful likeness of you, and they say that art is very true to life.”
“Pretty sure they don’t, and it’s a holoimage taken off of a security camera.”
“Semantics. Still a good picture. I have it framed on the wall.”
Hera laughed at that, and Kanan’s heart skipped a beat. “You would.” Giving him a smile, she said, “Happy Life Day, Kanan.”
“Happy Life Day, Hera.” Kanan felt himself returning the smile as she turned to leave, weaving her way through the crowd until she was out of sight. Then he managed to pull himself out of his daze and get back to work searching for presents.
It was only a little while later that he found something for Jyn while he was browsing a table covered in strange knick-knacks and tiny mechanical animals with no real use. And off to one side he found a smooth round rock in a shade of pale green. “What is this?” Kanan asked the owner of the table, a male Gotal who adjusted his glasses to examine it.
“Oh– that’s a dream stone. You find them on the moons of Iego, not that many of them make their way out here these days.”
A dream stone. Something in the words felt familiar, like Kanan had heard of them before. “What’s with the name?” he asked, reaching out and picking it up. It was cool at first, but to his surprise grew warm alarmingly fast in his hand. It leveled off into a soothing heat after a second or two. Very interesting, Kanan thought.
“Apparently, they sense nightmares,” the owner told him. “And they either soothe you out of them or wake you up– I’ve never tested it out. My kid did, though, and it worked like a charm for him. They also glow in the dark.”
“Huh.” Kanan studied the rock for a moment, skeptical. It certainly felt different in the Force than your average rock– both similar and dissimilar to kyber. “Any idea why it does that?”
The Gotal shrugged. “There are theories. One of them is that–” he paused and glanced around, then lowered his voice– “that a Jedi blessed them with the Force, and that’s why they do it.”
“Huh. And what do you think?” the Gotal hesitated, and Kanan said, “I’m at a black market– I’m not about to report you to the Empire.”
“Fair enough,” the Gotal said. “My brother and I always thought they were from the rock near where the Jedi’s lightsaber crystals came from. It made more sense to us, anyways.”
Kanan nodded thoughtfully– it did make sense. He started to put it back, but hesitated, his thoughts going to Jyn. Jyn, who woke up far too many nights with nightmares and who refused to talk about them yet.
“How much for it?” he asked. The Gotal named a price higher than Kanan would have liked, but he paid for it quickly, slipping the stone into one of his belt pouches and moving on.
Ezra’s present came quickly afterwards– Kanan spotted a game he remembered the kid saying he and his family had played. That, a pair of fingerless gloves, and a gray scarf for Jyn as recommended by Chenni, completed his shopping. He stowed the presents back in a bag, and moved to meet the others back where they’d started out.
When he arrived, Ezra and Jyn both had Life Day orbs– Ezra’s was shaped like a Loth-cat’s head, and Jyn’s was a delicate shade of light purple with dark dramatic lines tracing through it. Kasmir was holding a large box along with several bags, which probably didn’t mean anything too concerning. Kanan hoped.
Okadiah was the last to join them– to no one’s surprise– and they soon made their way out of the warehouse, bidding Tiernan a quiet goodbye as they left.
Stopping only to pick up their supplies, they headed out of town and back to the Yellow Submarine by the light of the two moons. Kanan got the kids into bed as quickly as possible while still being subtle, then got to work. Life Day was tomorrow– he only had a few hours to figure out how to make it the best kriffing Life Day possible.