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"What the hell are they doing?"
Dib glanced over to where Zim was looking at. Behind the skoolyard fence, there was a walkway where a couple were. ...Who were kissing each other.
Dib rolled his eyes. "They're kissing. Humans do that sometimes."
"Why?" Zim sounded more disgusted than genuinely confused.
"I dunno, people do it when they like each other sometimes I guess?" Dib shook his head, "What's it to you anyways? Don't you want to just kill everyone?"
Zim waved his hand, "To defeat my enemy I must know my enemy! Learning about human culture and their ways of life is essential to blending in!"
"Right... Course..." Dib bet if somebody overheard that, there still wasn't even a little bit of a chance they would suspect ill intent from Zim, despite him LITERALLY saying it out loud.
"So, how does it work?"
Dib raised an eyebrow, "How does what work?"
"This 'kissing' thing!"
"Uh, it's just people putting their mouths together. There's not much to it at all."
"Well there has to be some reason for it! For it to be so commonly practiced there must be SOME idea behind it!"
"Well..." Dib thought about it, "I mean, I hear it feels nice or something? It's generally just something that couples do."
"Yes yes your weird... human coupling process. Well, that's still not an answer! How can something like that feel 'nice'?"
"I... don't know? It's not like I'VE done it before or anything."
"Well how are you supposed to speak for what it is if you've never even done it!"
"Well- Because... Because......" Dib struggled to think of a reason. Zim only laughed at that.
"Look!" Dib went straight back to arguing, "Just because I haven't done it doesn't mean that I don't know how it would feel."
"Yes it does," Zim argued back. "Whatever- doesn't matter anyways. Unless it does. I can just find somebody else who's more... knowledgeable about the subject!
Dib felt randomly frustrated. It's not something he ever felt annoyed over before, but here? "Look... Just, uhg..."
"...?"
Dib reluctantly grabbed Zim's hands and leaned in to kiss him. It was just a small thing. A little press, just purely educational... But it was nice.
The two of them moved off each other. Both of them blinked once.
"...Gross!" Zim yelled.
"Well I told you!"
Zim pointed a finger at Dib accusingly, "Your entire mouth is made of water!! You did that intentionally."
"No, that's just what spit's made out of, ZIM! I didn't DESIGN humans!"
A girl giggled from nearby. They both turned their heads towards the noise, and the long purple haired girl stood there with her camera, obviously having taken a picture.