Chapter Text
Mikey was enthusiastic.
He was finally getting married, one that he didn’t expect ever since he was young. Never believed to himself that someone would actually want to be with him romantically, more or less getting into another level of love that bloomed between him and Senju. It was unexpected that they managed to know each other from the start, much more if never given thought by the others that they would hit it off! Both having similarities and differences at the same time, it could be seen why they are a pair.
Fixing his neck tie while Draken helps him tie his hair, Mikey felt both nervousness and excitement. “Ken-chin, is this how you felt when getting married to Emma?”
“Hm,” Draken squeezed the hair tie. “Feels unreal, doesn't it?”
Mikey nodded as he gave a grin in response, glancing at the wall clock. The wedding will start in a few minutes and by the rehearsal which he took multiple times, he should be at the altar waiting for his future wife. Mikey blushed at the thought of calling Senju his wife, and he was waiting at the altar as he was being comforted by his friends and family to calm down.
The ceremony finally started, everyone was in proper arrangement and the priest was standing in the middle as he will be the one who will bless the couple. And when Mikey heard that it was time to open the church doors, he focused in that direction as he saw Senju, his future wife, in a wedding dress.
God, it feels surreal. Her snowy hair matching her dress, her light makeup that would highlight her face, the flowers on her hands… Senju was remarkably beautiful. Mikey was trying his best to not cry at the sight, emotions flowing inside him and felt that his older brother was approving them both to be together.
Takeomi and Haruchiyo were the ones who walked their little sister in the aisle, and Mikey could tell that the brothers were also joyous to have him as their brother-in-law, especially Haruchiyo. Once when she set her foot to where Mikey is, she looked so beautiful in his eyes. Now that Mikey can see her closer, he couldn’t wait to lift her veil and seal their marriage already.
The priest did what he does best, blessing and leading the wedding ceremony. It never took long when he told them to recite their wedding vows. For Mikey, there was an option if he would just read the default wedding vow or speak from the heart. Of course, he would choose the second option - and if it’s for Senju, he’d be willing to talk about how much he loves that woman.
He took a deep breath, “Sen.”
That lovely nickname he gave her sounded so sweet.
“You know how much I love dorayakis, right?” Everyone inside the cathedral chuckled and Senju rolled her eyes as she giggled. “But it’s not as much as I love you.”
“Akashi Senju, thank you for waiting. Thank you for letting me learn how to love someone again, thank you for saving me along with Takemitchy.” He grinned, holding Senju’s hand tighter. “Remember that time where I’m sunken into darkness and you had to fight to get my senses back?”
Senju nodded.
“I think that was the time when I fell in love with you. It’s not that weird, right? Falling in love with a person who beats you. But, it was nice. I felt… peace when I saw the pouring sky. You were staring at it as well, laying on the ground tired after fighting with me. Then, I thought to myself if I could repay such kindness, will I be able to make you happy? And, you said in return that you’ll wait until I make sure I can make you happy.” He was sure he could see tears forming in Senju’s eyes. “Say, did I make you happy now?”
“Happier than I could’ve been.” Senju smiled, knowing it’s her turn to say the vows. “Sano Manjiro~ since when did you get so cheesy?”
“But yes… that time, I did love you so I waited patiently for you to make sure you’ll be able to make me happy. I wanted to make you happy as well! I… wanted to defeat you in exchange that you would be saved from that darkness that engulfed you. Must it be because you also saved me from that day?”
Mikey hummed in response. “That time, huh?”
“It still feels surreal that we’re finally getting married. Thank you for entering my life, Mikey.”
The priest fetched on that their vows are finished, he called the ring bearers. They could’ve sworn that they could hear a few squeals coming from the audience, specifically from Emma and Hina then hearing Yuzuha trying to shush them both. Only giving a chuckle, they were captivated by their moment as they received the rings from Peke J, who was being carried by Chifuyu. It was a cute sight, as Senju and Mikey gave a quiet thanks to them.
When they wore their rings to each other, the priest announced what they were excited for. He looked at Mikey, who was clearly nervous yet happy. “Do you, Sano Manjiro, take Akashi Senju to be your wedded wife to live together in marriage? Do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her for better or worse, for richer and poorer, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, be faithful only to her, for as long as you both shall live?”
“I do.” Mikey answered, taking a deep breath as he was already getting thrilled by the thought of kissing Senju.
Then the priest turned to Senju, repeating what he just said.
Although… just as Senju was about to say what everybody wanted to hear…
“I do—”
The part where she was standing, near to the beautifully sculpted statue and where the chandelier hangs along with the outstanding stained glass decorations, suddenly collapsed and it directly hit those in the front, especially to the couple. How mysterious for the cathedral to fall, there were glass shards spreaded already and big amounts of concrete blocks piled up all over the place.
Gasps were heard at the back as they rushed immediately to check the people in front of them, the scene acted so fast that they only stared in shock. “Crap…!”
“Shit… ow.” Takemichi groaned as he lifted himself from a few concrete blocks. Luckily, the front seats are not that near to the front, however he still felt fear and scared for his friends. He helped Hinata get up, then checked up on the others.
His worries were growing per second, he went to the altar as he looked over where Senju was, seeing that her place had the most blocks, glass shards, and parts of the sculpture stacked up. “Senju!”
Hearing Takemichi scream her name filled the Akashi siblings and the Living Legend duo rush up in the scene with growing anxiety inside them. They wouldn’t even know what to do if they saw her tainted with red, how much more if her future husband saw her in that state?! Mikey groaned in pain, holding his head as he was being held by Kazutora and Keisuke. His eyes were starting to clear after rubbing them, trying to see what’s in his surroundings.
Once when he heard noises calling out Senju’s name, he knew he had to go there. He didn’t even mind the injury he attained on his right knee, his mind only focused on her name. Mikey had to squeeze in, seeing Senju’s snowy hair with a tint of pink was painted with crimson. He kneeled down, grabbing her body gently with his voice cracking up.
“Sen…? Senju, baby, it’s time to w-wake up.” He didn’t move at all, his hand caressing her cheeks as he tried to hold back a sob. “You’re freezing… are you? You’re.. C-cold, should I hug you closely?”
Mikey looked at those who were in front of him while hugging Senju’s lifeless body. The others already picked up from what he’s trying to tell them, Takeomi and Haruchiyo are already planning something unpleasant if they happen to catch that bastard who made a part of the cathedral collapse suddenly where it shouldn’t be because there’s no possible reason for the cathedral to fall when it was built sturdy unless getting ruined by someone. How dare they ruin the wedding?!
His face displayed despair, looking so empty and broken. Mikey tried to deny that the love of his life disappeared in this world. It didn’t take long for the cops and ambulance to arrive at the scene. Just as they took Senju’s body away from him and covered her whole with a thick, dirty white cloth, he could still never move on from the fact that Senju died with her wedding dress on.
Night came and it was tiring and shocking for everyone to cope up with what happened. Instead of being happily married, Mikey was greeted with pain and despair once again as he lost the love of his life. The house he shared with her felt gloomy, empty, and it never hugged him with such warmth Senju used to when she’s waiting for him to arrive. Once he shut the door, his knees fell down as tears flowed down on his cheeks.
Why?
He asked himself. Why her? It could’ve been me instead!
Mikey was so drowned in his thoughts, completely ignoring the calls of his little sister that was ongoing for a couple of minutes before stopping. He left his phone on the floor, slowly crawling all the way to his shared bed with Senju so he could still imagine that she’s still here. He hugged the pillow as soon as he dipped in, her scent still lingering in the sheets as it smells like mint and strawberries. Mikey cried himself to sleep.
When Senju’s funeral is getting nearer, Mikey got worse. Sure, maybe his dark impulses aren’t appearing but his eyebags are. He awfully misses her so much that he’s been skipping meals, not showering for a few days, and been staying in his room! His friends and family are worried for him, they know how much it’ll impact him but not this much! He only got out of his room and ate food then freshly showered because Emma, Izana, Draken, Takemichi, and Hinata are able to talk him out of it.
Saying and asking him if Senju would be happy if he’s in such a bad state or grabbing his senses by mentioning the slightest of Senju. At first, Mikey’s reaction was heavily irritated and angry that Draken and Izana had to hold him out for his strength despite not eating for days and God, he’s so strong. But thank the heavens for Hinata, who once again, slapped Mikey from reality.
And there he is, sitting in the middle of the couch with Takemichi and Draken while Hina and Emma are cooking in the kitchen. Izana went outside to buy more ingredients for the girls who are cooking. Mikey didn’t mind what they were doing but he was definitely getting tired, the noises coming from the playing television were starting to fade out, and his sight started to get blurry. He’s trying to stay awake but unfortunately he can’t as his head fell at the back of the couch.
When he woke up, it was night time. Mikey felt a blanket on top of him, rising himself from the furniture as his eyes scanned if they’re still here. He began doubting and thought they probably went home already, not until he heard a curse word from the dining room. Of course, he had to check, considering that this is still his house (Not home, and for him, what is home without Senju around?) He only saw the same group of people were setting the table, signalling that it’s time for dinner.
Did they just stay here for a whole day? Mikey thought to himself.
“Oh, Mikey!” Emma called, “Thank goodness you already woke up. Come on, dinner’s ready.” He nodded and sat, and clearly Mikey was speechless. “Why didn’t you guys go home? It’s already late.”
Draken stretches his arms, “Well, you need someone right now.”
She’s dead, what else more do I need?
“Izana told us that sometimes you ditch dinner so we figured out that we’ll cook and eat dinner here with you.” Hina and place the eating utensils on the table as she puts her hands on her hip. Her eyes checked if everything was laid down on the table, and she forgot the drinking glasses. “Ah, I forgot those glasses… Hold on.”
Mikey only blinked and felt a hand ruffling his bed hair. He looked at Izana who was munching a piece of chicken skin he carefully ripped on Emma’s newly cooked fried chicken at the counter earlier. Usually, the blond would slap off his brother’s hands since he doesn’t like his hair to be touched unless someone fixes it for him, but this time he just lets him. He admits to himself that he likes the feeling of his hair getting ruffled.
He stared at the food that was placed onto the table, it was kind of similar to the ones Senju cooked before when she was still here with them. The sudden sight of it made Mikey unconsciously taste the food without waiting for the others to sit down – He had to know if this was the exact recipe. The same taste, the same flavor, the same warmth when he first tasted Senju’s cooking. Mikey kept tasting – eating, rather – Emma’s cooking, as if the food was running out and tomorrow he won’t be able to savor mouthful dishes like this. Everyone started to stare at him, trying to call him out and some were teasing.
Coming from the kitchen where the cook heard what the commotion was, Emma was carrying a medium-thick book that contained every recipe that Senju made as she stepped up in the scene. However, as soon as she arrived at the dining room, tears were visible from Mikey as he continuously ate.
He did not just break down while eating.
Sobs are already picking up throughout the whole room and everyone seemed way too struck to do something at the sudden action by Mikey – not even Takemichi could do anything to soothe him down. The way Mikey eats is getting sloppy and looking at him is so miserably sad; Had he been trying to bottle his feelings up until now? Had he been crying every night from the passing of his late fiancé? Every bite, every chew, every sip are mixed with sorrow as Mikey’s lips quaver, forcing out a smile at them. “Oh, man. I sure made a mess, didn't I?”
No one even dared to answer and Emma came closer to her older brother, hugging him from the back tightly as she placed the opened cook book at the table, close enough for Mikey to see the contents inside of the book. His eyes widened as soon as he recognized Senju’s handwrites that were inked down per page, there were pictures attached that are mostly food since it was intended to bind each and every recipe that she was familiar with.
And the book was fairly thick.
“...You have this?” Mikey gulped down his sob, “It’s still u...unfinished, Emma.”
His hands grasped at the texture of the hardback, and it says so much like her. Velour-soft and had some sort of a billowing organza-artistic feel. She wouldn’t want this as a paperback type of book – when cooking and using a recipe book at the kitchen as a guide wouldn’t last long if the cover was thin.
Emma gently explained, “We just figured if we cook meals similarly to what Senju does… maybe it could cheer you up?”
“If it was finished… this was supposed to be a gift for our child if they turned ten.” Mikey released out a dry chuckle, his fingers turning each page at a slow pace. “...I guess it wasn’t meant to be completed.”
Emma didn’t answer and instead, she watched him scan through the book. The dim light above them flickered once, the night breeze entered the house as it sent a chill to their skins. An embossed letter slipped out from the book when Mikey was flipping pages. When he opened the paper carefully, not wanting to rip it off, Mikey saw a few photos that were attached to it alongside a small lock and key.
This caught everyone’s eyes as they went closer to them, curiosity building up but they settled a fair amount of distance between the mourning and the sibling. Emma loosely let go of the hug and went to Mikey’s side, she wanted him to read the letter properly without her hanging off his shoulders.
Teardrops were left stained at Mikey’s cheek, rubbing his eyes to set it clear before reading Senju’s letter. And so, carefully and tend to try to be clearly, he read:
“To anyone who reads this, though I am aiming for my future husband to read this specifically, I hope you’d find the recipe book useful. Creating this took me some time and it was barely finished despite being fairly thick. Should I just end it and just make a part two out of it? Haha, that would take a lot of effort. Anyway, I made this for my and Manjiro’s future children if they ever turn a decade old – so it would serve as a long lasting birthday gift.
I wrote this letter when the wedding’s near, so you could probably tell how rushed my handwriting is — and I can’t be late to final preparations for the wedding, right? The purpose of this letter was… well, nothing special! It’s sort of a memorandum for the family – or just a guide – if you ever saw the lock and key besides this letter? Oh! Don’t mind the photos. That’s just a photo of me and my fiancé, my family, and our entire circle of friends!
I somehow bought a quite small storage b0x that requires three locks in order to open it with their key and you can only unlock it if you complete what it needs, thus the lock and key here. Though~! I recommend you to open it if you’re ready. (Manjiro, if you’re the one reading this, the recommendation still applies!)
I wish I could write more but I have no more time left. Whoever you are, I hope you’re doing fine. As for my future husband, Manjiro, just wanna let you know how much I love you, hm?
Lots of love,
Akashi Senju.”
Hands that are used to fighting gripped the letter, shaking. Feelings can’t be kept hidden anymore if it already overflows and breaks within the bottle despite tightening it securely, and that bottle just shattered once again after reading the meaningful letter Senju wrote. Mikey’s bangs overshadowed his eyes as he covered it with his eyes, letting the tears stream restlessly on his cheeks.
Oh, Akashi Senju – why must she ever imprint a special place on Mikey's delicate heart? Was it because she was just a genuine person? Was it because she was being herself only for him to love endlessly? Was it because she accepted him fully as he is? Countless reasons and questions that could explain why she was worth suffering for. Emma held out her cry, hugging her older brother tightly as if the world was ending tomorrow.
Draken, Izana, Takemichi, and Hinata also felt the pang in their chests after hearing the contents from the crying blond. Although the pain wasn’t measurable contrary to Mikey’s, Senju was a great person they lost from the accident.
The lass kept apologizing to her sibling, muttering every comforting word she could ever think of in spite of choking out a sob. “I’m sorry, Mikey. I’m so, so sorry.”
“I want her back.” Mikey begged as he cried heavily. “I miss her so much, Emma. I… I want to feel her warmth again and her laugh as well. Th...the way she cooks, the way she looks, the way she would get angry and get worried for me… I want to see her again, Emma.”
He felt so overwhelmed with such strong feelings he was never open much about before and couldn’t tell if these tears would ever stop or not. Mikey felt powerless without her.
“I love her so much, Emma. I don’t know what to do anymore.”
-
The funeral day came and several friends and family came over to pay their respects to the deceased former gang leader. Senju was lying in her casket, looking so peaceful and it only looked like she was only sleeping instead of the other way around. There were flowers that she would always love smelling. It was quite funny to think how her clothes had prints of cherry blossoms but her life was like a cherry blossom.
And, by that, just like a cherry blossom, Senju’s life didn’t last very long.
A queue was formed in the middle of the room, waiting for their turns to pray and bless for the dead. The scented candles breached the area, Senju’s photos were carefully placed with a stand at the side, and the flowers were displayed appropriately. The remaining Akashi siblings wore a tuxedo that was intended for the wedding day, it was for a funeral instead.
They thanked guests who came over, assisting some of them and thought it wouldn’t be as much enough for their beloved sister who did her all to reunite the three of them – and her efforts for making that happen would go to waste if they won’t get along.
Former and previous members of every gang they went contact with appeared. The day went by faster and it didn’t seem any changes occurred in everything except the disappearance of a charismatic leader. Her ashes were placed in a special vase inside of Mikey’s house, keeping it visible so he could always see her. It wasn’t easy for him to accept this in an instant albeit knowing she’s fully gone in his life.
He was a realist and an idealist at the same time (though he could be a pragmatist). It’s going to be alright if he could just imagine that she’s still alive – cooking, sleeping, playing, and hugging with her. However, how much he tries to think that mentally she is here, the impact of her physical state being present was different so he was hurting inside – and he couldn’t display it any further with this lot of visitors inside the room.
Though, he wasn’t the only one who was devastated by what happened. Takeomi and Haruchiyo — He discarded the name ‘Sanzu’ after mending things out with his siblings and for redeeming himself as he promised his little sister to become an Akashi once again — were doing their best to keep the vow they kept for the sake of Senju.
(“Hey! Tell me what, give me your hearts to keep it.” Senju beamed to her siblings. She stopped in her tracks while eating out chocolate mint popsicles in her hands. They were walking instead of taking the family car they owned – and Senju preferred walking anyway.
Sunset hues spread out to the sea of clouds that looked fluffy and similar to a cotton candy, both men in front of her arched an eyebrow. “Keep what?”
“Get along together!”
“...Aren’t we getting along together already?”
Senju shook her head, “If I was around, sure. What I meant was… even when I’m not here and there, everywhere, through any places – I’d like you both to hang out for once in a while…! I know you guys aren't on good terms due to what happened in the past and in spite of that, wouldn’t it be healed when you guys try to fix it? Slowly but surely, time will tell!”
Takeomi sighed with a smile on his face. Haruchiyo came closer to the petite girl as he only gave out a pat on her head, answering what she said. “We’ll do what we can, princess.”)
“Do you think Senju would be happy?” Haruchiyo asked, leaning to the wall after accepting guests from going inside. He never really gave his little sister a clear answer since he wasn’t really fond of making promises before. “You know, coming from what she asked us before.”
Takeomi flickered out his lighter. “Knowing her, she is- ah, fuck…”
“What?”
“It’s nothing. I just can’t seem to find the energy to light my cigarette.” Takeomi exhaled. “Probably she's happier that I stopped smoking to prevent wasting more years on my lifespan.” He tried to joke.
The strawberry blond muttered loud enough for Takeomi to hear. “About the smoking part… at least, a part of me says Senju won’t be that happy. Akashi Takeomi, a guy who smokes as if it was his signature style in his everyday life where his little sister was already accustomed to this type of lifestyle that, smoking, was a bond he shared with Mikey’s older brother.” He looked at him with eyes that are the same as Senju’s. “Are you sure about that decision to stop smoking?”
“...Haruchiyo...” Takeomi let out a small chuckle. “You seem like you want me to die faster.”
His brother rolled out his eyes.
“Well, I don’t really see myself stopping any sooner. She’d be groaning out in annoyance, wouldn’t she?”
“Yeah, I think so too.” Haruchiyo whispered, "And she'd be happy for us."
Takeomi turned himself to the other direction, putting the lighter and cigarette box to his pockets as he took a quick glance at their supposedly brother-in-law who was sitting silently with his hands clasped. Thinking how to approach him since both of them were not as close they ought to be unlike his little brother towards the blond.
He just sighed in defeat. It wasn't the right time to engage in a conversation with him. Perhaps next time he'll reconsider talking to the former gang leader.
"If you think about talking to him now," His little brother continued. "He won't be able to converse properly."
Haruchiyo stood beside Takeomi, putting his hand on his shoulder, giving out a tad bit weight on it. "The kin- Mikey, I mean, usually carries this emotional baggage to himself as if saying he's the only one who is able to bring it."
"I could tell." Takeomi relaxed his shoulders. "You know him a lot. That's great, I guess… Do you think he'll be okay?"
"Hopefully, he does."
"Hopefully?"
"It may not be noticeable but he's mentally weak, which is often overshadowed by his powerful physical image." Haruchiyo looked at his leader with a sad expression. "And it happens that it got worse now that… our only beloved sister, the love of his life, left this world earlier than we anticipated."
-
The day came by swiftly as night time arrived. The people who visited the funeral went home, other acquaintances gave their best regards to the family before going to their respective houses. Their closest friends and family were left behind, volunteering to fix and clean everything up - not minding if it's already late in the evening.
Stacking up the chairs with his childhood friend, Manjiro Sano didn't really say anything Keisuke had been chatting about. Only nods, a slight smile, hums, and a few words like 'Yeah', ‘Mhm’, and ‘Oh’s are coming from his mouth. When he noticed how he responded to his black-haired friend, he gradually apologized to him saying that he was tired from the events today.
Keisuke Baji understands, he knew what it felt to lose someone – considering how he lost his sweet mother a few months ago due to an illness. He pat Mikey’s back gently and gave him a quick hug, “It’ll be okay.”
“I…” Mikey blinked his eyes before hugging him back. “Thank you, Keisuke.”
His friend grinned, “Alright. I have to go now. Good night, Mikey! Take care.”
“Mhm, you too.”
Mikey watched him leave with his partners, waving a ‘bye-bye’ to them before continuing to place the stacked chairs at the storage room nearby. He gave himself a thought that he was envious of his childhood friend that he still progressed to life despite having a loved one dead – then he asked himself if he could do that as well. Nothing is easy when it comes to moving on from a certain person or place.
Was it because he was more used to carrying other people’s burdens and sufferings that he goes blind when it comes to himself? Was it because he has internalized self-hatred that he still continues to do so? Or was it because he blames himself for Senju’s death? Mikey thinks that he was too slow, too slow to save her from that sudden collapse of the cathedral ceiling.
She doesn’t deserve death – her life was plucked like a flower in a garden with ease.
The crickets started to chirp in the distance, and they just finished cleaning the place up. Mikey placed Senju’s ashes beside their photo frame together by the countertop, lingering his gaze towards her smiling picture as he painfully smiles. God, he misses her so much. He was able to have his own alone time after excusing himself from the others in the living room, letting him to recollect his thoughts at the back of his house.
Knowing he won’t be able to move on in the next few years made me feel like it was acceptable enough for him to think that he’ll never love other people besides her. Mikey felt devoted to that emotion which slightly made him happy because Senju’s love for him will never falter.
He heard footsteps coming in his direction, pondering on who that person was. Mikey doesn’t really mind who, he just wanted to have his own time for a while and–
“Mikey?”
“...Takemichi.” He called out. “It’s just you.”
“Yeah… I just came by to check on you.”
“Nothing will happen to me… I.. I promised to stay, remember?”
Takemichi chuckled lightly, “I know. You kept it. But… that’s not why I’m here.”
He tilted his head in thought and scanned his friend’s body language and expression. Mikey always observes, whether it was intentional or not, his habit of this never left him and had stayed with him ever since he was young. And, being friends whom he considers as family with Takemichi, he probably went here to help.
With the sudden silence spreading through the atmosphere, Takemichi broke it. “I want to help you.”
Help. Right, help. Such a chilly word for Mikey to hear again. He knows he assured him and everyone else that he’ll ask for help when he needs it (Everyone else lectured him that it’s alright to ask for help because it’ll never be a burden to them and mentioned that it’ll just strengthen his relationship with them) and will tend to request one from time to time —despite imploring such things as wrapping a gift or changing the water tank— “...Thanks, Takemichi but-”
“I think I still can save her. Just like how I saved Hina back then.”
Speechless. Mikey was speechless and seeing the look on Takemichi’s face was nothing but determination and sincerity. He didn’t really have to say anything, thinking that what he’s hearing was just a dream and needing himself to pinch his own arm in order to wake up- because it was way improbable for him to… pull off what Takemichi did. “The dead are supposed to rest, Takemichi.”
“Don’t act like you’ve accepted that already, Mikey.” Takemichi said. “You have the same look as I did when I attended Hinata’s funeral in one of the timelines I time travelled to before.”
Time Leaping sure was a memorable one. Since Mikey was saved, everything went back to normal and everyone was alive and happy. It had been a long time since their handshake after all, and Takemichi was sure Mikey should know how it works. “You want to see her badly, don’t you?”
“More than you could ever realize.” Mikey sighed in defeat, “It still hurts inside. No tears left to cry and all that was left behind is emptiness and Senju’s ashes to comfort me.”
“I want to see her too.” Takemichi admitted, “She was a great friend. Her life was taken earlier and that’s unacceptable…”
He raised his arm, displaying a position to handshake. “...And we wouldn’t allow that, do we? Mikey, I’m just telling you that we have the capacity to change that.”
The blond hesitated at first, “And what if it doesn't work or the timeline is shitty?”
“Come on,” Takemichi snickered. “You honestly think that it didn’t? Mikey, I messed up so many timelines just to save the love of my life and you, my close friend!”
Hearing that just made him cheer up a little bit. "Hey, I'm sorry, okay?"
"Pft, it was worth it anyway. So…?" Takemichi jiggled out his palms. "Shake it or…?"
"Alright, alright." Mikey exclaimed, "I owe you. Big time, Takemichi… Just promise me you'll take care."
"Like I always do." Takemichi grinned.
He extended his hand to shake his hands with Takemichi's. Mikey was confident that his friend would be successful in saving someone again, considering the numerous times he sacrificed in order to make a peaceful timeline for everyone - Just like now, it wasn't anything that ended up badly but it was just how the cycle of life moves in a constant time. Yes, not everything is flawless and both of them know that. Yet, they would always prefer a flawed timeline with everyone complete.
A world where Senju is also alive.
And because both of their goals are the same, the time leap request was accepted. Going through the past to change a tinsy bit for a better future they could hope for.
Usually, a wave of nostalgia would hit Takemichi that he came back from his roots during his teenage years spent with Toman, the memories he had made with everyone - some were nightmares (that he gradually took time to heal with the help of a therapist alongside with Mikey), and reminiscing of his pasts with other relationships outside of his circle.
That is, if he were the one who was brought to the past.
Mikey felt dizzy around his surroundings as if a small electric shock buzzed him. He blinked a few times, trying to clear his eyesight just to gain a better view of where he is at the moment. Rubbing his eyes, the place was overly familiar to him. It was similar to the interiors of the cathedral where his wedding with Senju occured. The stained glasses designed with the images of a depicted god and said son, the candle-light chandeliers that were hanged on the walls, rows of wooden peus that had little cushions underneath, columns of white pillars that supports the entire building, and the whole general idea of this architecture had been taken inspiration during from the Renaissance.
No, it couldn't be…?
As if pinching himself differs from the realities of this complicated world, Mikey immediately figured out what just happened. His chest became heavier, inhaling and exhaling briefly, the lad — although knowing in an instant — was still in utter confusion and several questions were inserted in his mind.
Why was it him who time leaped instead of Takemichi? Is this the same time a couple of days ago? Had he been dreaming heavily and possibly killed himself by not breathing in his sleep? Whatever it is, this was not what he expected nor planned based on his expectations for the deal he made with his close friend.
Well… it wouldn't be that bad if he were the one who handles his own issues right? Come to think of it, Mikey had been also relying on Takemichi's help for several years even though it was indirect. (He realized that during the process of saving both him and his girlfriend from the past twelve years, Takemichi had saved other people in order to have an ideal timeline where everyone is alive and happy.)
His inner thought had been interrupted by a call from Draken. "What are you spacing for, Mikey?"
"Huh?" Mikey blinked his eyes.
He felt a tug on his tuxedo, trying to straighten it out while the fashion designer was thinking to put more flair to his creation. Looks like they're in his dressing room. He saw Mitsuya having pin cushions on his mouth, Baji assisting Draken with styling his own hair by handing out hair pins.
The first thing that came to his mouth was mentioning her. "Where's Senju?"
"Are you that excited, Mikey?" Keisuke teased, "Never knew you were that clingy!"
"She's on her way." Draken said, fixing a ponytail on Mikey's head. "Just wait for an hour, she'll be on the altar with you."
Hearing that made him calm, a sigh of relief as if heavy loads were taken off from his shoulders. He nodded slowly from the response he received. Now he knows that the accident happened after an hour, Mikey can prevent her death by pulling Senju away from where she was standing. Small wounds and injuries are fine, at least for him, just as long that person is alive, it’ll be alright. Of course, it should be easy right? And to recall the events if he were in Takemichi's shoes, Mikey finally acknowledges the trials and obstacles Takemichi had to endure during those years — and he confirms that doing subtle changes in the past can change the future, not knowing whether taking action causes a good or bad future. (Everything was risky)
He kept tapping his foot, giving his best not to do so many movements or he’ll get scolded by Mitsuya. At the bare minimum while his worries are temporarily washed away, Mikey appears to be much more livelier.
“Mikey, can you stay still while I put on your necktie?” Mitsuya reprimanded. “I know you’re getting married in less than half an hour with the woman of your dreams, but this necktie won’t.”
Mikey playfully pouts after Mitsuya finishes tying his necktie as Draken pulls out his cellphone. “Calm down, Mikey. Do you want to call Senju before the ceremony?”
“Sure, why not?”
He was happy inside and on the outside, hearing Senju's voice was like a dream come true after days spent on crying, sulking, and mourning the loss of his lover. Begging to whoever was above and watching them that he’d do everything to see and hear her once again. It may be that this time-leaping had its own pros and cons that he should watch out for.
The sounds of a dialing number were heard and they were waiting for the receiver to answer it. After a few seconds, Draken handed Mikey his cell phone as he joyfully took it. Keisuke held out his laugh as he mouthed ‘This is what happens when a dumbass falls in love!’
‘You’re both dumbasses.’ Draken mouthed back.
“Sen!” The smile reached all the way to Mikey’s ears. “Where are you? It’s about time!”
“I know, I know!” Senju said on the phone, “I’m on my way! The wedding dress was too frilly to fit inside the car. Have you been waiting?”
“Always, Senju.” Mikey smiled while holding out the phone, “Everyone’s excited to see us.”
A giggle was heard, “Really? Then should I tell the driver to go faster then~!”
“Listen, Kenchin is waiting to get his phone back.” He snickered as he looked at Draken when he said that then focuses on Senju. “I’ll be seeing you on the altar, I love you.”
“I love you too–”
It was disrupted. It suddenly went black, Senju didn’t finish the sentence. There was a crash that sounded like danger and this caused Mikey’s fear to crawl up. “..Sen? S..Senju, are you there?”
No answer. She always responds but she doesn't. Mikey dropped Draken’s phone with a feared shocked look that Draken didn’t even bother to argue about the reason why his friend dropped his cell phone. This made Baji and Mitsuya alert to the sudden change of the atmosphere inside the room and it was intense.
And it didn’t seem a good timing when Takemichi entered the room, supposedly fetching Mikey to go to his position up there at the altar. He didn’t need a word to catch up just to tell him that there is something wrong. Seeing Mikey freeze, as if all the traumatic experience he took time to heal within himself came back, and when he saw the door open beside Takemichi, Mikey hurriedly went outside. He does not care whether his tuxedo is ruined, his hairstyle got messy in an instant, or giving enough shits about the preparations where it wasn’t equal to what happened during that phone call. The others followed him and tended to give their best to catch up to the fastest runner.
He sensed that Senju’s location wasn’t any further. He feels it, his intuition alarming him to go where she was. Mikey doesn’t even need a locator right now, it was all up to where his legs depart him anywhere in the streets of Japan. Mikey wasn’t a religious man — neither his friends and family except the older Shiba sibling — however, he took a mental prayer to himself that nothing bad ever happens to his future wife.
God, no. He couldn’t handle another death. No, no, would he ever allow it.
Mikey knew he was getting closer to where she was, the police and ambulance siren noises became nearer and nearer and the whispers of people were now louder. His eyes widened in shock and disbelief upon the sight as soon as he arrived when he felt his legs stop. How? How did it come to this ? Why… why must Senju’s body be stabbed with three iron poles with the car being almost squeezed?
His breathing became heavier, “Senju… Senju!”
At this point, Mikey didn’t care whether he violated a policy or rule in front of the cops. All he cared about was the horrible view and the love of his life. Draken and the others stopped in their tracks as they gasped at what's in front of them. There was Mikey who was being held by the police –visibly struggling due to his strength– while shouting, “Let go! She’s my fiance!”
“Sir, please, you may not go to the crime scene–”
“The hell should I care about that?!” Mikey gave a glare to the police, hinting a drop of murder, frustration, and sorrow to his tone. “If you won’t let go of me this instant, I’ll give you a taste of hell.”
Sighing in defeat and knowing they can’t win against the former delinquent, Mikey was released from their grasp as he entered the scene.
The red stains from Senju’s wedding dress reminds him of her first death inside the cathedral. Mikey was trembling as his hand reached to caress Senju’s unconscious face and her breathing was shallow. He gently whispered to her, “It’s going to be okay, baby… I..I promise.”
Then, he heard a small cough of blood.
“M..Manjiro.” Senju struggled to let out her words, “...I’m so sorry, I… I couldn’t–” She winced in pain as tears were forming, yet she forces out just to complete her sentence. “–go there… in time.”
“Shh… If you talk a lot, you’ll lose your energy.” Mikey pleaded. He held his hand and gave it a small squeeze. He tried to ignore the iron poles that were stuck through her body all the way from where it came by the windshield of the car. The trail followed as the driver was drop dead due to the impact of the construction truck that greeted them.
His mouth tasted bitter, feeling that a vomit was rising from his stomach. Senju slowly shakes her head off and tries to look at Manjiro just to look into his obsidian eyes once again. “...I want to get married to you…” There was a pause, gathering her strength. “D..dancing with you on the… dancefloor but,” She gave a pained chuckle as a teardrop fell on her face.. “Baby, I can’t… feel my legs anymore.”
Mikey didn’t speak. Instead, he only listens to Senju’s words as if trying to record it so it could play on loop. Her voice still sounds music to his ears, no matter how rough it can get. He couldn’t do anything besides leaning his frame carefully next to her, tears were streaming already without giving any notice.
“...Jiro.. will you give me a kiss?”
“O..of course. Anything for you, Sen.”
He gave her a proper kiss this time. A soft, gentle kiss as if getting married on the spot. He wouldn’t mind, she probably won’t either– They wouldn’t give a second thought if this was their last day in this world. It was longing for each other, they loved each other too much to the point where both of them are hurting. Not because they did something so devious, but because of the unfortunate events that kept happening in between their devoted love for each other.
Neither of them were prepared to say goodbye, it wasn’t planned and they never intended to. However, fate was cruel to the both of them. They were supposed to open a new chapter and have a new beginning of their lives at the end of the day, form a small family together, and… grow old together - no matter how cheesy it can get. The couple dreamed of a bright future with each other only for it to be broken so easily.
Mikey lets go of the kiss after noticing no response from her. That’s when he realized that she died while they kissed, figuring it out that Senju chose to end her life while having their last kiss together, making it seem less painful for her to endure than holding out her breath til her soul goes out. He whispered out something as he poured all of his tears out before stepping out of the scene. “I love you, Sen.”
His eyes were puffed out, tired, and wasn’t meeting any signs of life – It was nothing, like a black hole sucking every living planet in outer space. Mikey didn’t even bother to make eye contact with his friends who came after him, he just followed what the police asked him regarding the accident. It wasn’t really that long before the others came by, only for them to be horrified upon seeing Senju’s state. And it was much, much worse when her siblings rushed to the scene as well.
There were screams of despair and an angry cry. The entire road on that day was closed and soon was spread on national television then went broadcasted overseas.
-
Mikey couldn’t really understand. No, even at the beginning, the entire time leap process made him bewildered about everything. He thought he got it as if it was some easy task to be done – something that shouldn’t be underestimated. He wondered if he did something wrong in order for the timeline he was in turns out to be like that. The death occurred near the altar! Not on that pesky road…
He wanted to do something, he wanted to find out who was that reckless driver who was managing the truck and kill them with his own hands – be that as it may, Mikey has no more energy left him. He was mentally and physically tired that deep inside of him needed more time and space, perhaps words of comfort that could slightly help him feel better despite what happened. He deeply sighed, lowering his head and leaned by the cold wall.
Mitsuya and Baji took care of everything else and they even cancelled everything that was planned for the wedding- the catering services, the reception place, and the honeymoon setting. Meanwhile, Draken and Takemichi were the ones on Mikey’s side as they gave their best to aid consolation for the loss of a woman he loved. It was night time and Mikey was too depressed to change outfits and freshen himself up.
Life had always been so unfair to him. After numerous therapy sessions he endured just to learn his self worth, on how to love himself more, on how to express his feelings and not bottle them all up, and even find happiness in things that are unexpected but welcome – Was it not enough? Does life itself tell him that he does not deserve such happiness no matter what he does right? Or should he just not forgive himself from his past mistakes and let his dark impulses consume him once again?
But… Considering the amount of things Takemichi had to do in order of peace, out of respect, Mikey shook that thought off and decided to mourn for a while. He wouldn’t want to be a burden to someone else – it’s not what Mikey aimed to do. Though, he did smile at the thought of Senju finally having a chance to talk to his older brother in heaven. What kind of conversations would they be having?
Will Shinichiro tell embarrassing stories about his little brother? Will Senju and Shinichiro talk about Black Dragons? That is something they would probably chatter for hours if they want to. Maybe asking each other about the general idea like how Senju and Mikey fell in love with each other? Or it could be about them that were once childhood friends. So many possibilities and he wanted to cherish it with them – if only they were alive.
Remembering Shinichiro didn’t help him either. Only the negative memories kept appearing in his mind about that incident when he was only twelve years old. Ah, poor Mikey they admit. He must be exhausted after everything that happened. He doesn’t really want the entire world to see that he isn’t the best he can be. But how can he be the best if he can’t be better? Draken patted his back, giving a thick coat since the night breeze was quite chilly. “I’ll just buy something warm for you to eat. You should be hungry right now.” His eyes averted to the man who is at Mikey’s other side. “Takemitchy, you go look for him, alright?”
“I will, Draken.” Takemichi nodded as he watched Draken go for the nearest convenient store. Now that they were left alone, only silence hugged them. It wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable, it was just some sort of sorrowful silence they both understood.
Mikey lifted his head and interrupted the silence, “...I’m not the Mikey of this timeline.”
It took Takemichi a few good seconds before he processed what Mikey told him out of the blue; How is he even able to time-leap? Wasn't it only him that has the ability to time-leap? Or… was Mikey just being delusional? Takemichi wasn’t really a bright person when it came to analyzing simple sentences – It made him have bad grades during middle school up until high school. (Through college and Hina’s patience, he finally understood - well, except when it was a sudden approach just like now.)
“I.. see..” But then, he clicked a memory in his mind. Those lectures he and Naoto had before. “Did you happen to shake hands with me in the future?”
Mikey nodded groggily, “Yeah but it was me who got back in the past.”
“Why… Did you go back? Are things not proper there?” Takemichi couldn’t help but ask him carefully. He knows how heavy it could get if he just asked him out of nowhere like nothing tragic happened today. “W..was it bad?”
“N..no! Of course not. It… It wasn’t a bad future at all. Everyone was there, including you… and..” Mikey grieved, “I… I couldn’t accept that Senju died.”
It was a well-known feeling for Takemichi to recognize what Mikey felt. He also lost Hina in his life numerous times that he forgot how to live and was in constant depressive episodes. Because the moment he lost her for the first time, his life went downhill in luck. Then she died — Subsequently enough that he could secretly say that it was a blessing since it ended up pretty well (Despite the traumatic events) where he met his friends that he considers as his family.
“Is this how you felt when Hinata died on the original timeline?” Mikey asked, clutching his own chest. “Like there’s something weighing on my heart… as if not seeing her anymore just adds the load.”
Takemichi nodded and sincerely looked at him, “Have you seen the way she died?”
“Yes. Right in front of me,”Mikey let out a single sob as he continued. “And I couldn’t save her.”
“That’s when I felt when I saw her dying inside the car due to a crash coming from a truck.” Takemichi suddenly looked down as he saw his feet with his hands clasped. “At first, I couldn’t do anything. At that time, she and I weren’t in a romantic relationship and there she said that I broke up with her. Was really bummed at my future self, if you ask me.” He raised a dry chuckle from his mouth. “I was a coward. I couldn’t answer her question and just… excused myself and told her to go inside the car and wait for me.”
Mikey silently listened to him. “...And what happened next?”
“I witnessed her getting crushed inside the car.” Takemichi gulped down to his throat. “Felt betrayed too since Akkun, my close friend during middle school years, was the one who controlled that truck.”
He looked at Mikey who had a pity expression on him. Takemichi blinked his eyes as he waved his hands from left to right just to shake him from listening to his experience. A sweat dropped on his face as he let out a light laugh, “It was a long time ago so it’s totally fine now! I… I’m married to her now, you see?”
Mikey scoffed and rolled his eyes as he playfully slapped his back, “Stop flexing, Takemitchy.”
“I’m not!”
Both laughter went down as the atmosphere became serious. A flick of hope went to Mikey’s mind as he looked at Takemichi immediately. The said person was halfly confused as to why Mikey’s mood changed from being sulky to a weirdly casted hopeful man. It’s not that hope was a bad thing, it’s just that Mikey doesn’t seem like a person who relies on hope but rather on doing the actions himself.
After hearing Takemichi’s real life story earlier, he got the main reason why he time leaped in the first place. Coincidentally, a part of him tells Mikey that this entire scenario was similar to Takemichi and Hinata’s situation twelve years ago or so yet so differently at the same time. As if gaining a new reason to live, Mikey’s eyes started to go back to life slowly even though having the darkest eyes anyone could have. “If you managed to save Hina… do you think I can… rewrite the past and possibly prevent her death?”
“Huh… o-oh! Of course, Mikey! You can, I know you will!” Takemichi cheered, “If a crybaby like me can pull it off, then so can a charismatic leader like you!”
Mikey gave a wholehearted laugh as tears started to form again that he covered his face with his raspy hands. It was a new feeling that occurred in his mental system, and it felt so right that he did all he could to think of various ways just to save Senju. He lifted his head as he ran his hand through his hair, striking his blond hair away from his face.
He felt refreshed on the inside, as if being reborn in the afterlife. Like a free hunting bird that soars in the sky, Mikey inhaled plenty of fresh air as he stretched out his limbs. Standing up from the longest time of sitting made him a little bit dizzy– that he regained his posture in an instant.
Takemichi himself, despite being perplexed by Mikey’s actions, felt happy for him. Yes, he might be involved in something that he has undergone before but perhaps it can serve as a relishing moment to feel he is a kid again. Growing up was one thing but the given chance of feeling the thrill of saving an important person grew their determination and mental stability as an individual.
It was risky, they know. Everything has to take risks in order to get something they need – Like how life was supposed to play itself. Nothing will be ever attained if one does not do anything about it and just rely on expectations and false hope. That if it was done accordingly and succeedingly, it’ll be exchanged with something that calls ‘happiness’.
Words of encouragement only give Mikey much more energy. He knows not to get too far or ahead, sometimes having a big ego can destroy something. It had the capability to do something – and he was going to avoid that. No, he would never ever let himself get consumed by his own dark impulses and make everyone suffer again, including him.
Mikey displays his childish grin in front of Takemichi. “I owe you twice now, Takemitchy.”
“I’ll keep collecting them and use them for greater good.” The former time-leaper chuckled. “So, are you feeling any better now?”
“I would be lying if I wasn’t. It still hurts but… I think I can handle it for now.”
Takemichi motioned his head, “You’re going your best Mikey. I think Senju will be proud of you.”
A hand flourished in front of Mikey. “Looks like we reversed our roles. I’m now the trigger and you’re the one who’s reacting to that.”
“You’re right.” Memories from the Three Deities era flashed, making Mikey squint his eyes before shaking that thought. “You’ll be helping me, right, Takemitchy?”
“Like how a big brother would.” He gave out a sheepish smile. “Even though you’re older than me by a year.”
Takemichi wouldn’t allow Mikey to lose himself once more. He had seen enough and it ached his poor heart watching him succumb to darkness. After all, he knows what he went through and he witnessed all of it. His hand started to ache from putting it on air, shaking it as a signal for Mikey to time leap already.
“Mikey, my poor hand is waiting.” He joked. “It’s… about to fall off.”
The blond huffed his cheeks out as he thanked him once again. “Alright. Thank you again, Takemitchy. It means a lot to me.”
The mentioned lad gave a nod as a response, finally having contact with Mikey’s hand as he handshake with him. It was such an emotional ride for Mikey to perceive this as a whole. With all the events that occurred from the future and to the past, he felt as if God was punishing him for having a good life after a long time wishing for it. But he refused to end in a bad future again, he cannot afford it. Mikey found a new purpose in life and it’s not being the number one delinquent – as he already completed that ‘childish’ dream of his and realized that there were more deeper ones that he needs to explore –
With Senju guiding him to a path that he needs to personally seek, Mikey wants to discover that newly found path with her as they go forward with their lives. It’ll be a change but as long as he is with him, Mikey knows he will be alright. And he won’t let that dream come to lose. As if her disappearance made the world seem so cruel and dark – for him – that when she was still alive, Senju was Mikey’s beam of life that he awfully clinged on and became momentary instead.
She was his momentary beam of light; and he’d risk it all to get her back in his arms.