Work Text:
Gears.
So, so many gears.
Tick, tick, tick, tick.
It smells like rust. Her nose burns.
She’s done it.
She’s done it.
SHE’S DONE IT!
Croissant Cookie, atop her homemade timeweaver scissors, laughs.
And laughs.
And laughs.
Her voice does not echo. It’s drowned out by the ticking.
She can’t see out of her left eye.
She doesn’t care.
She’s done it.
———————
Timekeeper watches herself behind a rift.
She smiles. How entertaining.
Her past self laughs. For a concerningly long amount of time, yes, but Timekeeper isn’t concerned.
Oh, sweet innocence. How long has it been since she’d last let out a genuine chuckle?
It will only go downhill from there. Or uphill. Though for most cookies it would be downhill. How long until the monotony sets in? The freedom, the imprisonment of inevitable boredom? Not long, she supposes.
A grin sets in on her face. How long until the first destroyed timeline? The first crumbled cookie? Oh, she loves tuning into other Timekeepers’ (or croissants’) timelines. Always so predictable, but fun to watch nonetheless.
Of course, there was only one Timekeeper. She’d made sure of it. All other potential Timekeepers were either regular, boring cookies in a regular, boring timeline, or reduced to crumbs. Her grin widens.
She hums. Perhaps she should remove this future Timekeeper as well? But this Timekeeper was still Croissant, and why would she remove such a lovely, reliable cookie for no good reason?
She laughs mirthlessly at her own internal monologue. She’d removed many, many “lovely, reliable cookies” for no good reason before. Ah, how exciting.
The Timekeeper in the rift is back at the TBD’s headquarters now. She wears an unstable smile on her face.
Oh, how boring. This is exactly how most other timelines went. She seals the rift shut, but before it closes, she notices something.
This Timekeeper has a scar.
Perhaps this one would be more fun? Like her own Croissant, who deemed herself her new “friend”. How exciting!
She peeks back through the rift, and this Timekeeper (or rather Croissant) is rummaging through her desk. What timeline was this? Some random offshoot of what, Timeline-O?
Ooo, and this Croissant has a fun medal hung up on the wall. Timekeeper certainly doesn’t remember competing in a gliding competition! (Although Timekeeper doesn’t remember a lot of things.)
And then the Croissant speaks.
“I can see you, you know.”
Her voice comes out garbled, glitchy through the hazy mist of the rift. Timekeeper lets out a surprised laugh.
“I didn’t! You’re very interesting.”
The Croissant sighs. “The rift is pretty big. You’d think I’d notice a hole in spacetime the size of my head following me around, wouldn’t you.”
Timekeeper smiles. “Not at all. Did you pay attention to the horrible droning of Butterscotch Cookie on their lesson on the fourth dimension? I’d expect more from you, Croissant Cookie.”
The Croissant grimaces. “Aaaaaand you know my name. Of course you do! Of course. Random cookie who lives in the fourth dimension who’s been watching me all day knows my name. Why wouldn’t they? This is perfectly reasonable.”
“Pah, reasoning is for cookies tied to mundanity who live the same life every day. Spice it up, won’t you?”
“...no. I think my life of being the director is wonderful and far from… mundanity. And since you know my name, won’t you tell me yours? Or would you rather me refer to you as “Stalker Cookie”?”
“Timekeeper cookie.”
“...so THAT’S what String Gummy’s been talking about. Alright, alright, fine, cool, whatever. I’m just going to-“
The Croissant closes the rift. Timekeeper is left floating, alone.
Timekeeper reopens the rift.
“Okay, so- HEY!”
Timekeeper waves.
The Croissant is with another cookie, one she recognizes. String Gummy, just another TBD employee. He looks very different, much more interesting than his counterparts.
“You,” he hisses.
“Me.”
The Croissant glances between the two. “Soooo… do you guys know each other?”
“Know each other? That monster ruined my life.”
Timekeeper laughs. “Well, that’s funny! I don’t remember you much, but maybe I’ve seen you walking around in the halls like… twice.”
String Gummy growls. He turns to the Croissant, looking like he’s going to tear her apart. Maybe this timeline wasn’t like the others, then?
“What in the world is she doing here?”
The Croissant holds her hands up in a placating gesture. “Hey, the first time I saw her was this morning! She was like. Watching me through a rift and stuff. I was doing PRIVATE THINGS, TIMEKEEPER.”
“You were laughing at yourself smack dab in the middle of where I lived. It’d be hard to not watch you.”
“WAITWAITWAIT- where you LIVE?? You live in a rift?? That’s kind of sad actually-“
String Gummy cuts her off. “Don’t feel sympathy for her. She destroyed my home, and I feel like she wouldn’t hesitate to do it to yours.” He glares at Timekeeper, eyes drilling (or at least attempting to) holes in her skull.
“He’s right, I wouldn’t. I’d probably laugh doing it, but I’ve done it so many times that the thrill’s probably worn off… oh, what I would do to experience it all again. I mean, I could do that, but I’d get like… 1000 years older and I’m already old enough.”
String Gummy and the Croissant stare at her, String Gummy in horror, disbelief, and anger while Croissant in disbelief and a little bit of awe.
Timekeeper grins.
The sound of another rift opening makes the Croissant and String Gummy jump back.
“TIMEKEEPER! Where in the world have you BEEN? You’re still the director of the TBD, you know! You can’t just-“ oh, her croissant was here!
The two Croissants notice each other and stare.
Croissant groans. “How much have you messed up this timeline?”
Timekeeper grins. “Not a lot, actually! Nobody’s crumbled, at least.”
Croissant laughs nervously at the “joke”.
She turns towards the other Croissant and String Gummy. “Apologies for anything that Timekeeper may have done! I promise she’s… ah… a cookie deep down, and we’llbeonourwayBYEEEE!”
Croissant yanks Timekeeper by the arm back into the rift and closes it as fast as she can.
“Gah, my Timecraft is kind of busted up. Timekeeper, what were you thinking?”
Timekeeper smiles.
Croissant sighs. “Fine. Whatever. I’m just going to- ughhhh. How about you come with me back home and we’ll order a sandwich from Sandwich’s shop or something.”
Timekeeper pokes her cheek with a finger. “A blt?”
Croissant shrugs. “Sure. Whatever gets you to STOP MESSING AROUND WITH THE TIMELINES! You make my job so much harder than it should be.”
“I keep you in business.”
Croissant stares at her with lidded eyes. She sighs.
“Whatever. Let’s just get the sandwiches so you don’t end up crumbling some innocent timeline.”
Timekeeper cheers.
They get the sandwiches. Timekeeper refrains from affecting other timelines for a solid two days. The end.