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Post-mission shenanigans were truly the best.
Missions varied quite a lot; some were fun enough, given that they threw in a bet or a challenge to spice it up. Some were gruesome; involving several corpses and gallons of spilled blood. Others were simply monotonous, nothing out of the ordinary. Those were the truly the most disliked ones.
Despite the type of missions, the activities after them were always fun, albeit in different ways. On some days, they stayed up battling over video games, making bets over them. This was usually the atmosphere after the fun missions. Other times, they stayed up in the bedroom, clinging to each other, desperate to forget. That was for the late hours after the darker missions. As for the activities after the boring missions? Those depended on the mood that day.
Today's mission had been one of those boring ones. They had been informed of some meagre organisation who dared to try and use the Port Mafia's name to get their way with other small organisations. Besmirching the Mafia's name like this was certainly unforgivable. Taking out the group of impostors took no more than three hours, including the really long travel time.
But well, the mission had gone well, and they had the rest of the day off. Besides, it was already late in the evening. There wasn't really anything else to do than go back home and find something fun to do.
Chuuya was poring over take-out menus when his partner burst into their shared bedroom. The taller of them had changed out of his work clothes, now dressed in usual loungewear he wore at home.
Dazai flopped down on the bed next to the other, and pointed his finger at one of the menu cards, "Noodles and dumplings?"
Chuuya nodded as he thumbed in the order on his phone, "Noodles and dumplings it is. What's up?"
The brunet straightened before throwing down a sheet of paper on the bed between them, "Look what I found in one of those men's pockets. You know, those men from the organisation we took down earlier."
A curious voice, as the owner peeked at the paper, "Eh? What is it?"
Dazai leaned forward, his fingers carefully tracing the text on the paper, "Well, it's supposed to be a computer code. But not just any code, Chuuya! No, it's supposed to put us in a group chat with our future selves, if done properly."
His partner arched his eyebrows incredulously, "With our future selves? That sounds far-fetched; what is this, a sci-fi manga?"
Dazai deadpanned, "Chuuya, we are literally ability users. And you find such a meagre thing impossible?"
Chuuya tilted his head thoughtfully, "Huh. You do have a point. Maybe it's a program built with somebody ability or something. We are trying it, right?"
The bandaged boy already Chuuya's laptop open and unlocked on the bed space between them, "Obviously. Has your hat eaten away at your brain, Chuuya~ Asking such silly questions is-"
The redhead cut him off with a punch to his arm, "Shut the fuck up and input the code."
Dazai rolled his eyes, but proceeded to type in the given code in the command prompt anyway. Today's mood was kind of sombre. The two of them weren't bickering and yelling as much as they usually do. It was probably because they were tired from the mission. The travelling to the imposing organisation's base, to be particular; not the mission itself.
A few seconds later, Chuuya's laptop dinged as it went completely blank. Another second later, the screen flickered once before displaying grey, pixelated lines of buzzing feedback. The lines finally subsided, only to display a chat screen with white background.
In the middle of the screen, was a pop-up box asking for a maximum of three names. The Double Black duo exchanged curious glances before the taller half went ahead to input their names.
Chuuya muttered, "Is this even safe? We're giving out our names to a code we got from a rival organisation."
Dazai just shrugged, "Probably not, but let's see what happens."
Before Chuuya could yell at his idiot of a partner for being extra idiotic, the new program on his laptop screen dinged four consecutive times to display four notifications.
System has added Dazai Osamu (16) to the chat.
System has added Nakahara Chuuya (16) to the chat.
System has added Dazai Osamu (22) to the chat.
System has added Nakahara Chuuya (22) to the chat.
Chuuya gasped after having read the notifications, "Whoa! It might actually be the real deal."
His partner hummed, "Looks like we're meeting our twenty two year old selves then." A heartbeat later, he added in a softer voice, "I still haven't died, huh?"
Chuuya frowned at him before reaching his hand up to pat his head once, "Don't say that, asshole. I'd never let you die." He then added in a sharp voice, "Not because I like you or anything, because I definitely don't! It'd just be annoying to do all our missions by myself!"
The brunet pointed out with an amused smile, "You wouldn't have to do them alone; you'd have a new partner, right?"
Chuuya inhaled sharply as if he'd just been insulted, "A new partner? Me?! I'll never have a new partner, oi!"
Dazai laughed at him, "So what I'm hearing you say is; I'm the only one for you?"
The redhead blushed for just a second before merely shrugging, "Something like that, I guess. Only because it's indirectly your fault that I'm in the mafia, okay!"
Meanwhile, on his screen, a text was already waiting for them.
Dazai Osamu (22): Hello???
Upon noticing the message, Dazai (present time) spared his partner a careful glance before turning back tot he keyboard and beginning to type.
Dazai Osamu (16): Hello???
Dazai Osamu (22): Stop copying me, you mafia brat!
At this point, his counterpart entered the chat.
Nakahara Chuuya (22): idiot don't pick a fight with yourself
Dazai Osamu (22): But Chuuya!
Chuuya's lips curved up in amusement as he watched his future self text his partner's future self. He turned to said partner, "Is there any way I can join the chat from my phone?"
Dazai hummed, his attention completely focussed on the group chat, "Check it; you probably have a link already."
The redhead immediately pulled out his phone to do so. As usual, Dazai was right. Chuuya already had a link in his messages from a weird-looking number. Well, they had already crossed way beyond just 'weird'. What was happening now was definitely supernatural. Chuuya went ahead and clicked the link.
Nakahara Chuuya (16): Hi!
Dazai Osamu (22): Omg, littler chibi!! So cute <3
Nakahara Chuuya (22): you realise you sound like a pedophile right,, the kid is 16 bro
Dazai Osamu (22): Why Chibikko, are you jealous~
Nakahara Chuuya (16): God you're still insufferable huh,, Adult Chuuya why are u still in touch with that guy
Nakahara Chuuya (22): dw kid, I ask myself that everyday,, it's beyond my control at this point
Dazai didn't really do well in talking to strangers freely. At least not in present time. But it looks like his future self was certainly more sociable. Strangely enough, he even sounded a little happier?! Dazai was confused; but it let it pass. For now.
The shorty next to him ribbed him, "Oi, you can talk too, you know. They aren't strangers. We might not know them, but they already know us."
Dazai shot him an eye roll and a soft, amused grin before turning back to the laptop.
Dazai Osamu (16): Was it ever in your control, Chuuya?
Nakahara Chuuya (22): sigh good point,, brb questioning life choices again
Dazai Osamu (22): And you call *me* dramatic. Unbelievable
Nakahara Chuuya (22): IT'S UNBELIEVABLE,, THIS IS AS GOOD AS IT GETS
Nakahara Chuuya (16): IT'S UNBELIEVABLE, DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT
Dazai Osamu (22): IT'S UNBELIEVABLE! YOU HAVEN'T SEEN NOTHING YET!
Nakahara Chuuya (22): IT'S UNBELIEVABLE,, IT'S UNBELIEVABLE
Dazai Osamu (16): ....
Dazai Osamu (22): ....
Dazai Osamu (16): You truly have been with Chuuya for too long
Dazai Osamu (22): Agreed. Seven years with a Slug is too long
Nakahara Chuuya (16): *Slug*???
Nakahara Chuuya (22): dazai u idiot be more careful,, we can't tell them what they don't already know
Dazai Osamu (16): What!! But's that so boring!!
Chuuya started at his partner next to him as if he'd suddenly sprouted two heads. A few seconds later, he finally spoke up, "What the fuck was that?! I've never seen you text with exclamation marks."
Dazai shushed him by literally pressing a fingers against his lips, "My future self does it; so I figured I'd try it as well. Shut up, Chuuya."
Chuuya rolled his eyes but didn't say anything else. Trying new things, even the littlest ones, was good for Dazai. That was all that was said and thought before the pair turned back to their respective devices.
Nakahara Chuuya (22): probably but its for ur own good
Dazai Osamu (16): Fine, older Slug.
Nakahara Chuuya (16): Is this going to be a thing now *sigh*
Dazai Osamu (22): Definitely! While we're at it, let me tell you that Chibi calls me Mackerel. Isn't that so cute!
Nakahara Chuuya (16): It's not cute at all! It's probably because you're still slimy and gross like a fish!
Nakahara Chuuya (22): bingo that's exactly it
Dazai Osamu (22): Say Chuuya, you really haven't change at all, huh? Good. Stay that way, kid.
Dazai Osamu (16): ... I don't to feel about my older self
Nakahara Chuuya (16): Is it just me or does he sound sappier than u
Nakahara Chuuya (22): oh he's definitely a sap,, absolutely disgusting
Dazai Osamu (22): Don't lie so much, Chuuya! You love me! You'll never grow if you keep lying so much!
Nakahara Chuuya (16): I'm 16, I'm still growing!
Nakahara Chuuya (22): im just 22, i can still grow!
Dazai Osamu (16): He didn't grow, did he
Dazai Osamu (22): Not even an inch
Nakahara Chuuya (16): Fuck you,, seriously?!
Nakahara Chuuya (22): oh shut up. if anything its ur fault for not drinking more milk or smthn
Dazai Osamu (22): *snorts*
Dazai Osamu (16): Oh wow
Nakahara Chuuya (16): I agree with the mackerel,, you've truly been with Dazai too long. Seriously, MILK, CHUUYA?
Nakahara Chuuya (22): oh shut up already
The conversation sort of died after that. Neither of their future selves anything, which made their present selves assume that they were probably discussing something in person. It was kind of hard to believe; that the two of them would still know each other even after six years. Not just that, from the way they talked amongst themselves, it was clear that they were closer to each other. It was a little surreal, if Dazai was being honest.
Chuuya nudged him, "Future you kinda sounds happy, Mackerel."
Dazai just rolled his eyes, "Probably no thanks to you, Slug."
Before they could continue to bicker as usual, their group chat screens dinged with a new message.
Dazai Osamu (22): Anyway, didn't this system get my name wrong?
Nakahara Chuuya (22): ffs,, here we go again
Dazai Osamu (16): ...? That's literally our name though?
Dazai Osamu (22): Whaaa~ No way! I don't go by that name anymore!
Nakahara Chuuya (16): Dazai changes his name in the future??
Nakahara Chuuya (22): we're doing this ig,, yeah that's not his name anymore
A few minutes of silence and shared curious glances later, Dazai aggressively typed the question they both were itching to ask.
Dazai Osamu (16): Well, what's my name in the future then?!
Nakahara Chuuya (22): dazai u can't tell him
Nakahara Chuuya (16): Don't be a spoilsport, adult me! I wanna know too!
Dazai Osamu (22): Ne Chuuya, isn't it fine? Younger me is smart too; he'll probably figure it out soon enough
Dazai Osamu (16): Agreed. Now just tell me already
Dazai Osamu (22): Hmm I don't know. Chuuya??
Nakahara Chuuya (22): ur not gonna listen to me anyway so just tell him already
Dazai Osamu (22): Hehe no; you do it <3
Nakahara Chuuya (16): yeah future me,, do it. We are one and the same and I'm telling u to do it
Dazai Osamu (22): I don't think it works like that, Littler Chibi
Nakahara Chuuya (16): How about u stfu
Dazai Osamu (22): Is that how you talk to your *senpai*, Chuuya??
Nakahara Chuuya (16): WHO'S MY SENPAI OI
Dazai Osamu (22): Jeez, you're loud over text too, huh
Nakahara Chuuya (22): oh my god
Nakahara Chuuya (22): his name is nakahara osamu,, that's his name, now shut up all of u
Dazai Osamu (22): Yep, that's correct!
Dazai Osamu (16): ....Have both of you lost it??
Dazai Osamu (22): No way! That really is my name!
At this point of time, the doorbell to their shared apartment went off loudly, giving them both a jumpstart. They had been too absorbed in their chat screens after all.
Chuuya swallowed as he stood up, "I'll go get it. So you just stay here and figure out and what those two are talking about, alright?"
Dazai scoffed before turning back to his laptop, "That goes without saying."
Dazai Osamu (16): How and why exactly is my name *that*?
Dazai Osamu (22): It's my married name! Well technically, I also use Nakahara Dazai Osamu sometimes but yes.
Dazai Osamu (16): Your *married* name?! You married the Chibi???
Dazai Osamu (22): Unfortunately, yes.
Nakahara Chuuya (22): unfortunately, says. the bandaged whipped fucker. oi kid mackerel,, how about u just tell my younger self that ur in love with him already. it caused me months of turmoil yk
Dazai Osamu (22): Ah yes, Chibi's mind back then: omg does he like me?? does he not?? fuck!!
Nakahara Chuuya (22): yeah so just tell him already. it'll be worth it. trust me, *partner*
Dazai Osamu (16): Partner, huh. You two haven't changed much either
Dazai Osamu (22): Of course, we haven't! In some ways, at least. But anyway, just trust us already! You'll never find better wingmen
Dazai Osamu (16): Ah yes. My future self and his husband; the best wingmen in existence
Nakahara Chuuya (22): exactly fucker. now go get ur man or whatever. dazai dinner is ready
Dazai Osamu (16): Our food is here too. See you guys later then?
Dazai Osamu (22): Let me guess; noodles and dumplings? Because same here
Dazai Osamu (16): Yeah. Somethings really don't change. Bye then. Thanks guys.
Dazai Osamu (16): Chuuya says bye too
Dazai Osamu (16): <3
Nakahara Chuuya (22): yeah see u kid. bye!!
Nakahara Chuuya (22) has left the chat.
Dazai Osamu (22): No matter what happens; hang in there, okay? Don't you dare do stupid shit and rob me of my future with Chuuya. See you later~
Dazai Osamu (22) has left the chat.
Dazai Osamu (16): Yeah. Promise.
Dazai just finished saving the chat as his partner showed up with their bags of food. He proceeded to plate everything and then plopping down two plates of food for them on the bed.
Chuuya cleared his throat, "So uh, did you figure out what they meant?"
Dazai stretched lazily, "Oh that. Yeah, we got married in the future."
Chuuya turned red instantly. He choked, "You-? We?! We got married?"
His partner gave him a smile before pushing the laptop towards him, "Looks like it. Here, read the rest of the chats."
The redhead eyed him suspiciously for a few seconds before turning to the laptop and reading through everything. It didn't take him very long to catch up on all the messages that had been sent while he was away from keyboard. He closed the laptop lid once he was done reading, still averting his gaze from his partner's.
Dazai clicked his tongue, "You finish reading?"
Chuuya just hummed in response, still looking away, "Yep."
Dazai whined softly, "Chuuuuuuya. Ugh, this is the worst!"
This time, the redhead turned his head around to face the other, "What is?"
Dazai sighed as he lay down on the bed, kicking his legs, "Me being in love with a stupid chibi like you!"
Chuuya couldn't hold in his gasp, "You what?"
Dazai pouted up at him, still lying down, "You stupid slug! Didn't you see what your future self said!"
His partner scoffed dryly, "You don't have to confess or whatever just because they told you to. We don't even know them."
Dazai reached up his hands to pull down said partner's head closer to his, "But they know us. Isn't that what you said? And they're right. I do have gross feelings for you."
Chuuya rolled his eyes as he leaned forward to kiss the other's nose, "Dork. I love you too or whatever."
He was faced with a very familiar face grinning up at him lazily, "Glad that's settled then. Chuuya is my dog for life."
The redhead protested, but his voice sounded weak even to himself, "I'm not your dog, oi."
Dazai raised his hand to entangle his fingers in bright red hair, pulling the other down and pressing up a kiss to his partner's lips, "Dog, boyfriend, future husband. Same thing."
Because Chuuya was so used to having this shitty mackerel as a partner, and hence used to all his never-ending bullshit; he simply rolled his eyes, a unique grin gracing his face,
"Synonyms, huh?"