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His skin itched. It burned.
He turned in the bed, desperately trying to find someplace comfortable.
His body ached. His skin was red raw.
Doing his best to stop the itching only made the burning worse.
If Camilo still had his gift he would just shift into someone else. That normally alleviated the irritation.
But he couldn’t. Because he didn’t have his super cool gift.
Because he didn’t have his super-cool ability to make people smile.
To make people happy.
To ensure that he was wanted by someone.
There was always someone who sought him out.
A child who needed a mother’s comforting face.
A mother who needed a break.
Someone who needed to practice talking to a specific person.
Someone who needed a loved one back just one more time.
He was always needed.
But not as Camilo.
Ever since Casita had fallen and everyone was slowly rebuilding the house, Mirabel had made a point to remind the family that they were more than just their gifts.
More than their miracles.
And when someone tried to refute her claim, she only pushed harder. Claiming that a miracle is temporary.
He knew that she meant well
He knew that she was just doing her best.
But the harder she pushed the more frustrated he became.
And somehow, now Mirabel and himself were out on a hill in the middle of the night screaming about it.
“If I am not my gift then who am I, Mirabel?” He yelled. Mirabel hesitated, searching for an answer. “Tell me!”
“You’re Camilo.” She said gently. He rolled his eyes at her words.
“And what good is Camilo?” He asked, staring at her. “No one ever wants to be around Camilo, they want to be around someone else.” He stated, doing his best to push back the reappearing tears. “So please, Mirabel, tell me. What good is Camilo? Why would anyone want to be around Camilo? What is it that is so good about Camilo that makes him matter?”
“Camilo is my Primo. Mi Familia.” She said, staring at him. “Camilo is my best friend.” She added, a little softer.
He could see the tears building in her eyes as she stated the last part.
“Since when did that matter to you?” He asked, attitude much more intense than he had intended.
“What?” Mirabel asked. He could hear the offended tone that she took.
“Since when does being family or being friends matter to you?” He pushed.
“It’s always mattered.” She raised her voice, only if slightly.
“Oh, really?”
“Yes, really.”
“Then why weren’t you there? Huh? When I needed you, you weren’t there.” He spat out. He hated the words spewing from his mouth but at the same time, it felt nice. To finally lay it all out.
“What are you talking about? I was always there if you needed to talk to me!” Camilo scoffed at her words. “If anything, you weren’t there for me! You became too good for me the second that I didn’t get my gift!”
“You stopped talking to me the second your door disappeared!”
“You stopped talking to me too!” Mirabel countered.
“Because you never wanted me to!” He yelled. “Because you didn’t want anything to do with me after you didn’t get a gift. I stopped mattering to you.”
“Because all you ever did was use your gift!”
“Because that’s all anyone wanted from me!” Camilo tried to reason.
“I didn’t!” Mirabel screamed. Her voice cracking as she confessed to her Primo.
Camilo stopped upon hearing her words. Mirabel waited for a snarky retort. When it never arrived she continued
“I didn’t want you to use your gifts!” She yelled. “I just wanted my Primo. My best friend.” She looked down, sighing, wiping away tears that streamed down her face.
“Then why did you pull away?” He asked.
“For a lot of reasons.” She replied shortly. Camilo went to open his mouth. “A lot of reasons that you wouldn’t understand!” Mirabel added.
“Then please, explain!” He waved his arms around helpless at what else to do.
“Because, I was jealous, because I knew I would never be as good as you, because no one wanted me to be around you, because I didn’t feel good enough, because you never wanted me around, because I didn’t want to hurt you gift!” She listed off her reasons, counting them on her fingers.
“You have no idea how hard it was for me, seeing you with your amazing gift. See you with your amazing gift, knowing that I would never be like that!” She cried. “You all of a sudden had the entire town wanting to be friends with you and all the town could see me as was the screw-up. The one who wasn’t good enough. The one who didn’t have a gift!”
Camilo stared at his younger Prima. He had no idea that she had felt so strongly about him getting his gift. He knew she was upset, but not like this. He opened his mouth to comfort Mirabel, but his attempt was cut short by Mirabel continuing her rant.
“No matter how hard I tried to talk to you it was always ‘Mirabel, leave Camilo alone.’, ‘Mirabel, Camilo is working.’, ‘Mirabel, you are getting in the way.’!” Mirabel recounted the most common phrases she had heard for a long time. “And you weren’t any better!” She shouted, her tear glazed eyes staring at him. “No matter what I did, no matter what I said, all you ever did was run away!”
“Because I blamed myself!” He yelled back. Mirabel stopped to look at Camilo. “I believed, and still do, that I stole your magic! Our gift ceremonies were mere weeks apart from one another. I believed that it was my fault that you didn’t get a gift.” He shrunk down. “I still do.”
Mirabel backed down.
“And every time you walked away I thought that you were mad at me too.” His voice broke.
“Abuela didn’t like when I went near you.” Mirabel spoke softly. “She didn’t like when I was near anyone but our Papás. I’m pretty sure she thought that I was going to end up stealing your gift or something.” she looked up at her cousin, the pair both looking so vulnerable.
Mirabel slowly leaned down until she found her way to the floor. She sat down and began to pick at the grass below her. Camilo followed suit.
“I’m sorry.” Camilo said after a few moments of silence. “For everything.”
“Me too.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“I know.”
The pair flopped backwards, laying down in the grass staring up at the night’s stars. Mirabel turned her head to face her Primo and chuckled a little before she spoke up. “You know, I used to hate you.” She sniffed, laughing at the absurdity of her words.
“What! Why?” Camilo asked as he quickly sat up, staring down at his cousin, thoroughly confused.
Mirabel shrugged, opening and closing her mouth repeatedly, looking for the right way to say it.
“You lied.” She concluded.
“What?” Camilo asked again, even more, confused this time. “When? How?”
“In the nursery…” She paused. “Before you got your gift…” Her voice cracked. Mirabel stopped again, willing the forming tears away.
Camilo looked down at the ground, doing his best to try and pinpoint when she was talking about. He shuffled through his memories, thinking back to all the promises that the two had made. Nothing stood out.
Mirabel stared at Camilo watching as he tried to figure out when she was talking about. After a moment, she had realised that he couldn’t remember.
“On the night of your ceremony.” She offered, watching as the gears turned in his head.
“Uh… nope. I got nothing.” He admitted, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment.
“I… I uh,” She tried to find where to start. “I was upset the moment that the family had started packing up your things.” She said, avoiding his gaze. “I mean… we lived in the same room for the first five years of our lives, our entire lives.” Her hands shot up and she began to gesture randomly.
“That I remember.” Camilo smiled as he thought back on all the time he spent with Mirabel as a young boy.
“What? Me being upset?” Mirabel smirked.
“No, just us before the ceremony.”
The two smiled as they thought about the time they had shared.
“I remember that we used to hold hands wherever we went and told everyone we were twins.” Camilo beamed at the memory.
Mirabel laughed as she thought about it.
“We actually managed to convince them that it was true.”
“Until Mamá and Tía Julieta explained it to everyone.”
The two giggled as they reminisced.
“Where were you up to?” Camilo prompted.
“Oh, right. Um… I was upset that everyone was getting ready for you to move into your new room.” She repeated. “I didn’t say anything cause everyone was so happy, excited. Especially you. But then, on the night of your gift ceremony, I just kinda popped, I guess.” She explained, looking at him to see if he wanted her to continue. He nodded.
“Go on.”
“You were getting ready to go get your gift. Everyone was downstairs dancing and talking and having fun. Your Mamá was getting you ready and I refused to leave the room.”
“I remember that part.”
“Yeah… well, when I saw you all ready to get a door, your own room, your own gift… I guess it all became too much. I just… I broke down into tears. Your Mamá was so confused and you just kinda rushed to my side and gave me a hug, doing your best to make me laugh. Tía left to go get Mamá and it was just the two of us. And you asked me what was wrong. And I told you that i was sad that you were leaving.”
“And I made some stupid joke about how I wasn’t running away or anything.” Camilo interrupted.
“Yeah…” Mirabel chuckled, sitting up. “I begged you not to go, to not leave me behind, to not leave me alone. I told you how I was scared that because we weren’t staying in the nursery together that you would forget me. And you looked at me and said, ‘Don’t worry, you’re my best friend Mirabel. I promise I’m never going to leave you behind. We’ll always be best friends, no matter what.’.” Mirabel swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat.
“There’s nothing that anyone can do to make me forget you. Especially some super cool gift.” Camilo finished for her quietly.
A heavy silence fell on top of the teenagers, neither knowing what to say.
So instead, Camilo stood up and walked towards Mirabel and sat down next to her.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered, looking at Mirabel.
Mirabel smiled back before resting her head against his shoulder.
“I know.” She said.
The two sat in a comfortable silence, gazing up at the bright stars filling the sky.
“Hey, Cami?” Mirabel spoke up. Camilo hummed in reply. “Can you promise me something?”
Camilo let out an overly dramatic sigh before responding. “I suppose I can for my favourite Prima.”
“Promise you won’t forget me when this is over?”
“Don’t worry, you’re my best friend Mirabel. I promise I’m never going to leave you behind. We’ll always be best friends, no matter what. There’s nothing that anyone can do to make me forget you.” He said mirroring the words he spoke all those years ago.
“Not even some super cool gift?” She asked teasingly.
“Especially some super cool gift.”