Work Text:
One
Hearing a quiet groan preceded by a soft laugh, Kyoya roused himself out of his wandering thoughts and looked over towards the twins. While Honey, Mori, and Haruhi had all already left for the night, considering the late hour once the fair had concluded, Kaoru and Hikaru had stuck around a tad longer. Kyoya wasn’t certain if their lingering came from simply not wanting to make the effort of standing, or if they were as worried about Tamaki as they all had been.
“Alright, Senpais, I think that’s enough of a day for us,” Kaoru said, standing with a stretch before helping Hikaru to his feet. Kyoya frowned at the wince he gave, eyes lingering on the injured arm in the sling around his neck. “You two gonna be alright?”
“Of course,” Kyoya tilted his head, gaze trailing back to Tamaki. He hadn’t spoken for the last fifteen minutes and looked as if he was firmly between frustration and deep exhaustion. Kyoya wasn’t sure which one would win out first. “Hikaru, remember to take another dose of medication before you settle in for the night. Kaoru, make sure to remind him to take it when he forgets.”
Waving off the equal amount of laughter and grumbling, Kyoya barely watched long enough to make sure the two were on their way before he was looking back to Tamaki. While Kyoya wasn’t one for idle fears and worries, he could admit, if only to himself, that the idea of letting Tamaki out of his sight was too terrifying a concept.
The sound of the door closing to the room was what made him speak, Kyoya leaning back against the couch with a quiet hum, “You’re rather quiet tonight. Last year’s fair I couldn’t get you to quiet down about how much you enjoyed everything for a week, at least.”
Tamaki gave a quiet laugh, but it wasn’t right. It was nothing like his careful or genuine laughs, but instead nothing more or less than a mask. The smile he gave Kyoya was much the same. “Perhaps I just finally grew tired of the sound of my own voice! Didn’t you used to tease me about that happening?”
“I believe I used to say something to the effect that it was impossible for you to ever grow tired of hearing your voice,” Kyoya corrected, watching Tamaki for a long moment. He was no doubt still punishing himself for what had happened -- as if any of it could ever be his fault. If any one person were to blame Kyoya would happily place it all upon the other’s grandmother. “And we all know I’m never wrong.”
Tamaki gave a quick, startled laugh, Kyoya feeling a bit of tension leak out of him at the sound. Shifting on the couch to give the other his full attention, Kyoya waited until he caught Tamaki’s gaze, “We already told you, Tamaki. We want you here. We love this club just as much as you do.”
“That doesn’t excuse the fact that it causes so many problems for everyone.” Goodness. How did Kyoya end up with such a self-sacrificing idiot as a best friend? “I know it causes problems for everyone-”
“Problems that hold very little weight compared to everything else the club offers us,” Kyoya cut off, giving in to the urge to roll his eyes when Tamaki, always a bundle of nervous energy and movement, threw himself off the couch and headed towards one of the back rooms. Considering it was the room with the piano, it was equal odds as to whether he wanted something familiar close by or whether he wanted to work off some nervous energy.
By the time Kyoya gathered himself together and headed towards the room, it was to the sight of Tamaki sprawled across another couch, arm thrown over his eyes in familiar dramatism. Kyoya couldn’t help a small smile, shaking his head, “The other couch was that uncomfortable, then? Or should I be the one feeling offended?”
Tamaki was silent, slowly and carefully moving his arm to look at Kyoya. While Kyoya had been expecting the gaze full of guilt and self-hatred, it was still a sight that had him fighting to keep his calm more than he would have liked. What had him moving forward was Tamaki’s soft, helpless, “I’m an idiot, aren’t I?”
“Honestly,” Kyoya tsked, striding over to the couch and shoving at Tamaki’s legs until he could take a seat. He then wasted no time in wrestling Tamaki up into a sitting position, taking a moment to be amused at Tamaki’s pathetic, pleading eyes before he was wrapping an arm around Tamaki’s waist and pulling him in close. “I thought our ‘prince’ was supposed to hold a higher opinion of himself.”
There was one, tense moment where Tamaki held himself rigid, hardly daring so much as to breathe. Kyoya didn’t let it last for long, letting his free hand come up to curve around the back of Tamaki’s head, letting the soft, fine hairs thread through his fingers as he pressed him the slightest bit closer, “Tamaki.”
Tamaki slouched as if all his strings were cut, Kyoya gently guiding the other to rest against him. He figured he could be allowed the stinging pain that came from seeing Tamaki so lifeless as he curled against him, hands clutching onto Kyoya’s jacket as if he was afraid Kyoya would just leave. As if he ever could.
Honestly, he had always known Tamaki was affectionate -- one only had to look at his friends and the Host Club to understand that -- but this was something else. When was the last time Tamaki had allowed himself to relax around someone? When was the last time he had let someone hold him together?
Considering how the day had gone, Kyoya was willing to believe that it had been far, far too long since Tamaki had been given the comfort he needed. Kyoya wasn’t sure which of them was more damned if all they had was each other, but he was greedy enough to hold onto Tamaki until the other finally found some common sense.
Goodness, though… This hadn’t been how he expected to spend the second day of the Ouran Fair, he mused to himself. Reassuring Tamaki, yes, he was well used to that, but for as close as they were they weren’t overly affectionate with each other -- at least, not compared to how Tamaki was affectionate with everyone.
Kyoya had never been physically affectionate with those he cared for, but he found it rather hard to keep that in mind when he felt Tamaki shiver in his arms, his hand moving to rub at Tamaki’s spine before he could even think the action through. If Tamaki thought it was odd, he at least had the decency to not say anything about it.
With it being Tamaki, though, he never could stay silent for long, and Kyoya couldn’t find himself surprised when he heard the soft, “I’m an idiot.” Pressing harder at Tamaki’s back for a moment and tightening his hold on the other’s head when he flinched to move away, Kyoya stared down at him.
“You are not an idiot, Tamaki.” Silly, yes. Ditzy, undoubtedly so. Enthusiastic, incredibly so. An idiot, however, was one thing that Suoh Tamaki was not. “Contrary to popular belief, I know that you are more intelligent than others believe.”
Tamaki’s response was a sharp, bitter chuckle, the sound so, so wrong coming from Tamaki of all people, who’s laughter typically came out easy and warm. “Haven’t you heard, Kyoya? I’m the idiot prince of a host club-”
“Tamaki.” Had Kyoya really missed all the signs that led them to this moment? He knew Tamaki took others’ words to heart. He knew that. He, of all people, knew how dedicated and caring Tamaki could be, so why the fuck hadn’t he seen this. “You are not an idiot. If anything, this mess was just as much our fault for not noticing and letting you think-”
For letting him think that he was a burden. For letting him think that the Host Club would be better off without him. For letting him think that they didn’t care about him. For letting him think that he wasn’t loved-
Ah.
Things were changing. Kyoya had always suspected, at least in some part, how it would all come to an end, but a part of him had hoped that day -- that moment of realization -- would never come. It had, though, and for the first time Kyoya found himself at an utter loss on what to say or do.
Closing his eyes for a long moment, because this was far too much to go through for only one day, Kyoya glanced down at Tamaki to see he just looked… lost. Far more lost than even Kyoya felt, and, well… Kyoya had never been good at offering comfort, but he had always been good at knowing Tamaki.
Sliding his hand down to hold the back of Tamaki’s neck, the skin warm and soft under his hand, Kyoya lightly squeezed until he had Tamaki’s attention. Whatever fear and embarrassment he felt was far outweighed by the trust in the gaze given to him. “I thought we were best friends, mon ami.”
Just as suspected, Tamaki went utterly speechless, tears welling up in his eyes before slipping by and following the curve of his cheeks. The only reason Kyoya didn’t worry over the sudden tears was due to the accompanying smile, a soft and warm one that Kyoya had seen so rarely but delighted in every time.
Tracing his hand around to Tamaki’s cheek, Kyoya mustered up his own wry, honest smile as he used his thumb to brush away some of the tears, “A true host is always able to cry on command, hm?”
“Of course,” Tamaki laughed, an actual laugh, eyes fluttering shut for a moment as he tilted his head and pressed more firmly against Kyoya’s hand. “Just like a true host is always able to bring out tears when needed.”
“I’ll take your word for that,” Kyoya said, still absently brushing his thumb against Tamaki’s cheek as he took in the closed eyes, slowing tears, and quirked lips.
The change, it seemed, had finally come.
Two
“Thank you for your visit today, ladies, and please know that we’ll always be here waiting for you.” Kyoya smiled at the beaming, blushing girls, writing down a note to tally points later as they left. A few seemed interested in becoming regulars after finally visiting for the first time -- not that Kyoya could blame any of them. They had been introduced to Tamaki as their first host.
Rare was the girl who wasn’t immediately enamored once Tamaki decided to show his charm, and those that weren’t were often taken in by Haruhi’s sweet, calm demeanor when she swept in to clean up Tamaki’s messes. It really was nice to have another person willing and able to keep Tamaki in line, but there were days Kyoya had regretted ever seeing Fujioka Haruhi step foot into the Host Club room.
Her appearance had set off a chain of events that had knocked loose the very foundation of the Ouran Host Club and the aftershocks were felt even after things had seemed to settle. Haruhi, after repaying her debt, was a full-time member of the Host Club and had agreed to continue on with the club for a, as of yet, undetermined amount of time.
Kyoya had the feeling that she wouldn’t leave anytime soon, however -- as proven when Tamaki’s bright, ringing laughter burst to life in the air, Kyoya glancing over to see the other wrapped around Haruhi like the affectionate leech he was a dozen or so feet away.
He couldn’t tell what the two had been talking about before, but Kyoya latched onto the sound of Tamaki’s voice with ease, hearing his familiar, dramatic whining, “Haruhi! Why would you say such mean things to Daddy?” Oh, honestly. Tamaki had to know how that sounded to others, surely. Then again, it was Tamaki. “I just want the best for my little girl!”
Haruhi’s expression was utterly flat and unamused, but it wasn’t hard to see the spark of amusement in her gaze as she looked back up at Tamaki. “For the last time, Tamaki-senpai, I already have a father and you are not him.”
“Ranka-san and I can co-parent!” Tamaki beamed, Kyoya not completely certain if he was aware, on some level, of what he was doing. It was just as likely Tamaki was simply that much of a dumbass. “C’mon, Haruhi, we’re family.”
Kyoya faintly heard Haruhi’s soft laugh, glancing up as he saw Tamaki had settled and leaned back enough to where he was no longer smothering Haruhi and instead simply had an arm around her shoulders. The surprising part, or perhaps the part that wasn’t so surprising, was that Haruhi was completely turned towards Tamaki, attention completely open and on him.
It was the words she said that did surprise Kyoya. Words that he hadn’t expected and were carried in a soft tone that he just barely heard, “Senpai, I never said we weren’t family.”
“No… I suppose you didn’t, did you?” Tamaki had on that soft, warm smile on his face that came out so rarely. Not his excited, bubbly grins or his charming smiles meant for the customers, but the small, tiny smile that showed he was content.
A burst of noise from Mori and Honey’s table briefly caught Kyoya’s attention, Haruhi and Tamaki’s words drowned out for a few moments. Their actions spoke more loudly than their words, however. The two were fully relaxed in each other’s company, Tamaki nodding along to something Haruhi was saying as she looked up at him with a mixture of fond warmth and lingering worry.
Something she said had Tamaki giving a quiet, amused burst of laughter, expression utterly warm and content and Haruhi’s just as much so and…
Ah.
Kyoya remembered, now, why he had been so uncomfortable around Haruhi in the beginning, and why he still had his reservations even with where they were. Haruhi was a beacon of change, and her very presence with the Host Club proved that. She had forged deep, strong friendships with every one of them and, in return, every single one of them had come to care for her -- Tamaki most of all, it seemed.
Really, Kyoya shouldn’t be staring. He had his own work to do, after all. The Host Club didn’t run itself and like hell Kyoya could ever trust any of the idiots he called friends to keep things in order like they needed to be. Besides, their customers were still there, and the room was still busy. He would have time for daydreaming later.
Besides, no one had to know that as he looked at Tamaki’s warm gaze and Haruhi’s soft smile, he could only feel the soft strands of Tamaki’s hair that he had carded his fingers through. No one had to know that Kyoya knew the exact count of breaths Tamaki took per minute once he fell asleep, warm and content and right in his arms. There was no one, no one at all, that needed to know that it took Kyoya hours before he had scraped together the will needed to wake Tamaki up and see that he made it home.
They were friends, after all. It was to be expected that Kyoya would be there to support Tamaki whenever he was needed. Haruhi, though… Haruhi was good for him. There had been a reason, after all, that Kyoya had made sure she was the one to board the carriage during that entire… fiasco.
“Kyo-chan?” Honey’s soft voice startled him more than he would have liked to admit, Kyoya grateful that he at least managed to control his outward expression.
“Yes, Honey-senpai? What can I do for you?” Typically, it was a request for more sweets, but the look he was being given made him think the other was after something of a more serious matter. “Is everything alright?”
“Actually… I wanted to ask you that.” Hm. Honey looked completely serious, but Kyoya could honestly say that he hadn’t been expecting anything like that.
Thinking about his answer for a moment, Kyoya finally gave him a simple smile, “Is there a reason I wouldn’t be alright, Honey-senpai?”
“I’m not sure.” Ah, but of course… Honey may have been childish, but he was intelligent and had a good amount of common sense. It could be as helpful as it could be troublesome. “You seem… sad, though.”
Kyoya resisted the urge to flinch. He refused to look back at Tamaki and Haruhi, voices soft and quiet and, from where he was standing, sounding like they were tangled together. Honey was no fool, after all, and Kyoya knew the slightest slip-up could reveal… everything. “Of course I’m alright, Honey-senpai.” Kyoya went for a smile, tilting his head. “What would I have to be sad about, after all?”
Honey didn’t respond and Kyoya found himself thankful that the other wasn’t even more intuitive than he already was. There was plenty to be ‘sad’ over, after all.
There was always sadness at the end of things.
Three
Haruhi’s soft laughter was enough to jolt Kyoya out of his thoughts, gaze switching to her and then to the spectacle taking place in front of them. “You know,” she said quietly, “It somehow doesn’t surprise me that Tamaki-senpai has a diary.”
“If you ask him, he’ll tell you it’s an emotion journal,” Kyoya said, watching the twins torment Tamaki for a few moments before he was returning to his logs. “And why would it surprise you? This is the same man who waxes dramatic poetry about the butterfly he saw on his way to school.”
“You have a point.” Haruhi’s laughter was quiet and singular, in its nature, but it was so much livelier than it had been all those months ago when Haruhi had first joined them. “What are you writing today, anyways?”
“The usual,” Kyoya said, stealing a quick glance to see that Haruhi honestly looked interested, half-peeking over his arm to try and read his writing. Then again, she knew more about dealing with financial matters than some for the others -- Tamaki, especially. “Would you like to see?”
The question was out before he could even attempt to stop it, unable to take it back before Haruhi was smiling up at him, “As long as it's alright with you that sounds cool. You keep track of club expenses in there, don’t you?”
“Among other things,” Kyoya agreed, cautious because, well… He hadn’t encountered a scenario quite like this one before. “It does aid mostly in maintaining the club however, yes.” Settling back against the couch further, Kyoya shifted and lowered the journal so Haruhi would have an easy enough time reading it.
It wasn’t anything truly of interest, but Kyoya watched as Haruhi seemed to read each word carefully, giving it all her full attention. It was… interesting. He could see easily how she maintained her top grades if this was the focus that she was able to pull upon.
“Alright, I know you have profiles on a lot of our guests, and I’ve seen you adding to that point system you once told me about, but how do you always have the file you need on hand? There’s not enough room in this book for a profile on every customer that comes in.” Haruhi looked up to him inquisitively, Kyoya finding no reason to not explain after a moment of thought.
“Well, truthfully I keep all files on my laptop for easy access, but I do keep paper copies of the profiles I’m most likely to need or adjust during the day.” Kyoya flipped a few pages back as Haruhi shuffled in closer, pressed into his side as he explained. He adjusted slightly, letting her have an easier time of reading. “I typically have a rotation system depending on the behavior of some customers.”
“Oh.” Haruhi blinked, reaching down to flip through a few pages herself, Kyoya half-surprised he felt no urge to stop her. “I see. So, for these girls, for example, you would pull their profiles because they tend to visit on Tuesdays and Thursdays only. Right?”
“Precisely,” Kyoya nodded, lips quirked up as he stared down at Haruhi for a moment. He had never bothered to explain his system to anyone in the club, truthfully. It wasn’t a matter of trust so much as not wanting to waste the time when they would never need to know, but for Haruhi… he found himself enjoying explaining things to her. “As I said, it’s merely the usual.”
Haruhi gave a soft huff of laughter, looking up at him with a smile. He could see the tiredness that always seemed to weigh her down, always the type to push herself and do too much at once. With the soft smile she gave him, however, he could see a glimpse of something content; something soft and calm that reassured a part of him he hadn’t known was worried.
“You know, Kyoya-senpai,” Haruhi said, voice dropping into something teasing. “Your ‘usual’ tends to be pretty spectacular.” The laugh he let out caught him by surprise, Haruhi smiling in pride at managing to get it out of him.
It was the same look he had seen on Tamaki once, something open and full of pride and wonder at managing to startle a laugh out of Kyoya during one of his more stressful moments. He no longer remembered what the comment had been, but he had never forgotten Tamaki’s expression. Haruhi, it seemed, had the same kind of self-pride and joy as Tamaki in certain situations.
“You know, I’m not certain if you’ve been spending more time with me or with our dear ‘prince,’” Kyoya finally said, shaking his head as he tried to focus back on his work -- tried, of course, being the key word.
“That’s not so bad.” Haruhi’s soft voice had him looking up before he could think the action through. “Spending time with you and Tamaki-senpai…” Her voice trailed off, Haruhi herself giving a shrug as she gave a proper smile. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”
For one moment -- just one -- Kyoya found that his thoughts were completely silent. He had no response or reaction to such soft, gentle words that were spoken with so much certainty and truth. He had never had a defense against words of care that were spoken in truth, and it was the exact same as…
Ah.
Kyoya had known that change would be coming after the business with the Ouran Fair. A part of him always knew the change was coming, but this change was one he hadn’t prepared for. As it was, he managed to mumble something of a response before Haruhi was distracted by the profiles and papers, flipping through them curiously.
Kyoya let her, deciding it made a nice distraction for her as he tried to come to terms with the fact that not only had he caught affections for his first true friend in his life, but the same thing had happened to the girl that same friend loved. Perhaps his suffering was some sort of penance for his manipulating behavior in life.
It had been expected, not long after Haruhi joined the Host Club, that Tamaki would fall for her. Kyoya had seen it coming from the moment Tamaki had truly realized who Haruhi was, and perhaps even a bit before that. He had long since made his peace that those two would, one way or another, end up together.
His feelings weren’t factored into the plan. They weren’t supposed to factor into the plan. Kyoya knew the roles they would play among each other’s lives and his role was simple. He was a friend, and a confident, and someone to give advice when needed. He was not the ‘main character,’ to borrow Tamaki’s words. He was just… Kyoya.
Haruhi’s tug to his sleeve had his attention quickly returning to her, hating how he was all too happy and eager to answer any questions she could have. Really… he had expected things to change among them, just not to the extent they had.
He should have learned, by that point, that he could never truly step out of frame.
Four
There had been many instances in the past four years of his life where Kyoya had contemplated murdering Tamaki. He was proud to say that he had never actually gone through the planning stages of such a thing, but he wasn’t sure if he would be able to say that for much longer considering the way things had been progressing.
He had been attempting to give Tamaki and Haruhi the space and time they needed to finally sort out their feelings. He had been certain it would only take a few more days of nudging and keeping his distance for the two to finally work things out -- and it would have been if Tamaki hadn’t started trying to corner him.
The last two days had Kyoya coming up with more and more convoluted ways to avoid having a one-on-one conversation with Tamaki. He knew that if the other got his way, then he would ask why Kyoya was avoiding him and Haruhi both and why he seemed to be pushing them together. Kyoya was good with twisting his words when the situation called for it, but he had never been able to lie in any way, shape, or form when it came to Tamaki wanting the truth from him.
Tamaki, unfortunately, was like a dog with a bone when he set his mind to something and so Kyoya had been almost driven mad by the lengths he had gone to in order to avoid the idiot. His skill and luck, however, seemed to finally run dry that day.
“I know you can hear me, Kyoya! Just why have you been avoiding me all week!” Tamaki was, ‘supposedly,’ helping him find some dry towels to deal with the mess the twins had made with a ridiculous fountain. In truth, he was standing in front of the exit with his arms crossed while pouting at Kyoya fiercely. He most likely thought he was glaring, knowing him. “Kyoya.”
“Honestly, Tamaki, you’re letting your paranoia get the best of you,” Kyoya dismissed, forcing himself to keep his voice steady as he tried not to resort to throwing things around to find the goddamn towels that seemed to have just disappeared. “I’ve been acting the same as I always have.”
There was a harsh scoff, Kyoya warily looking over at Tamaki to see his bitter expression, “You know, you haven’t lied to me since we truly became friends. Is that finally over? Or do you think I’m that much of an idiot that I don’t notice when something is wrong with you?”
If it had been anyone else Kyoya would have been able to lie without pause that he was fine, and nothing had changed. It wasn’t anyone else, however. It was Tamaki. It was his best friend of years who was one of the few to know the true him.
Kyoya finally looked away, aiming for as dismissive a tone as possible, “I thought I already informed you that you are far from an idiot-”
“Then quit treating me like one!” Tamaki was stepping back into his line-of-sight without hesitation, eyes narrowed and serious. “You’ve been distant with everyone for days, but you’ve been flat out avoiding me for just as long- Yesterday you almost ran away when I almost managed to get you alone!”
“Contrary to what you seem to believe, you are not my number one priority in life,” Kyoya snapped, lie bitter and sour on his tongue as he tried to hold firm. “My apologies that not every second of my day is devoted to you.”
If it was any other member of the Host Club, they would have dropped it by now. The twins would have been sent running, Honey would have walked away with a pout, Mori would give a silent nod before leaving him be, and even Haruhi would have left him alone to his bitterness. Oh, but not Tamaki. Tamaki just had to get to the bottom of everything.
“That’s not it.” Tamaki didn’t look away for a moment, angry expression veering towards confusion. “No… you don’t make a habit of keeping your anger silent, especially when it comes to me. If you were hurt and trying to distance yourself from others, then you wouldn’t be taking customers like you have been the last couple of days. You’re upset at me, but you won’t tell me why…”
Tamaki trailed off and Kyoya felt his heart plummet to the center of the Earth. Tamaki was many things, after all, but he had never truly been an idiot. He was oblivious, but he could be clever, and he knew people. He knew Kyoya best of all. “Is…” Tamaki no longer looked confused. Instead, something like sadness and understanding filled his gaze. “This is about me and Haruhi, isn’t it?”
Kyoya could have lied if it were anyone else, but it wasn’t. It was Tamaki, and so all Kyoya managed was a quiet, “What would it matter even if it was?”
“Why would it- Of course it matters! You’re upset about something so that means it matters, especially to me!” Tamaki had never been good at manipulating people like Kyoya, but he knew people. He was oblivious on his own feelings quite often, but not the feelings of others. “Unless… oh. You- You and-”
“Me and no one.” The response was instant, but Kyoya didn’t expect to feel so much pain upon saying the words. “I’ve merely been giving you and Haruhi the time needed to properly express your feelings. If I knew it would have caused this much of a mess, then I would have been more upfront about it from the beginning.”
“Kyoya-” Tamaki took a step forward and Kyoya didn’t let him continue. He didn’t dare. Kyoya had no defense against Tamaki and his wishes.
“Didn’t you say you weren’t an idiot?” Kyoya raised an eyebrow, feeling himself tense when Tamaki took another step closer. “Please don’t act like one now. Everyone can see Tamaki, how you truly feel about her -- and how she feels about you. It’s a far too simple equation that even you should have pieced together by now.”
Tamaki shook his head, beginning to look honestly frustrated as he took another step forward, fists balling at his sides. “But you-”
“But nothing. It is you two who belong together,” Kyoya snapped, voice coming out as a hiss because he knew. He knew how it would all come to end so what was the point of letting himself feel the pain of it? “It was always going to be you two, Tamaki. Ever since that first day she stepped in here it was always going to come to this.
“It’s obvious she cares for you as more than just a friend, and for as much as you fight it, we both know you feel the same exact way about her. You two belong together.” Just as Kyoya belonged in the shadows, keeping everything just as it should be without being noticed. “You two being together is how it works, fitting into frame nicely and neatly just as it was meant to.”
Something he said finally seemed to rattle Tamaki, the other gritting his teeth and glaring at him with what would soon be frustrated tears. “You can’t lie to me, Kyoya. I know you better than anyone. You feel the same about her as I do-”
“And that doesn’t matter,” Kyoto snapped, slashing his hand through the air and hating how out-of-control he felt. There was a reason he didn’t give in to his emotions. “She would be happier with you, not me-”
“You can’t just make a decision like that on your own!” Tamaki seemed to reach the end of his patience, shaking his head fiercely. “You can’t just make a decision like that on your own! You know that she feels the same-”
“Don’t you dare.” The words were out before he could stop them, Kyoya hating how much emotion slipped into them -- how much truth slipped into them. “Don’t you- Don’t you dare, Tamaki.” Kyoya didn’t need to hear whatever Tamaki would say. He already knew and he didn’t need to hear words that would only hurt in a way he couldn’t deal with.
Instead of backing off, Tamaki took a step forward that sent Kyoya’s heart racing. There was nothing but seriousness when he spoke, a soft, “Or what, Kyoya?”
Ah.
Things had been changing for weeks, but they had finally changed to the point where Kyoya was well and completely lost. He had always been able to know, in some way, how Tamaki would react to a situation, but this was a reaction he hadn’t expected.
Tamaki pushing and not giving him any room to run was not a reaction he had ever been expecting. “Well, Kyoya?” Tamaki took another step forward, Kyoya taking one back on pure instinct and feeling a jolt of shock as his back hit the wall. “Why are you always afraid of good things happening?”
It took more effort than it should have to scrape together a response, Kyoya scoffing as he glanced away, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“You don’t, do you?” Tamaki was close. He was far too close. “You have always done this, Kyoya. Whenever something happens that could make you genuinely happy you take a step back. You always take a step back.” As if to press his point, Tamaki took another step forward. There were no more steps back for Kyoya to take. “Are you afraid? Is that it? Are you just afraid of being happy?”
Kyoya stayed silent, too many thoughts in his head and too many possible outcomes for him to know which one was the right one racing by him. For one of the first times since he had befriended Tamaki, he didn’t know how to react.
Tamaki seemed to realize the same thing, something in his posture slumping at the same time his expression relaxed to make way for a soft sigh. For a moment -- an eternity -- the two simply looked at each other. Whatever Tamaki gleaned from him, Kyoya saw the way it made the resolve in his eyes harden.
“You still trust me, don’t you? Even now?” Even after cornering him in this room. Even after pinning him in place and giving him no place to run. Even after the truth had come out. “Kyoya.” Tamaki’s voice was soft -- pleading. “Do you trust me?”
“Yes.” Kyoya’s answer was instant because that, at least, was one thing that would never change. Whether it damned him or not, Kyoya would always trust Tamaki. It was the one truth he would forever refuse to abandon. “Tamaki-”
Tamaki shook his head, so close now that their chests were near touching as Tamaki’s hands moved to rest against his cheeks. Kyoya hated the way it made his heart flutter for a moment, as if Tamaki meant anything by it.
“You trust me.” It wasn’t a question, but Kyoya nodded anyway, knowing Tamaki needed the reassurance. “Good.”
With that, Tamaki’s fingers slide around to the back of his head and under his ears, fingertips pressing lightly and moving Kyoya’s head forward until his lips brushed against Tamaki’s own.
For a moment that was stretched from one end of eternity to the other, Kyoya felt everything within him go blank and still. There were no thoughts, no fears, no worries, no plans, and no voice telling him to mind his place. There was nothing except silence, soft fingertips pressing him close, and lips that he had never known but had, in the deepest parts of himself, craved to one day taste.
Then Tamaki pressed forward and sighed out a soft sound that had Kyoya crumbling before he could even begin to make a stand. His hand snapped out to hold the back of Tamaki’s head like he had all those weeks ago after the end of the fair, pulling the other close and shivering when he felt the brief smile flicker against his own lips.
It was a kiss that tasted like absolution, Kyoya not caring, for just a moment, if it ruined everything. All he found himself caring for was the way Tamaki drifted in closer, Kyoya not sure if Tamaki was moving in himself or if Kyoya was pulling him in closer. Either way it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter what the end result was, because Kyoya knew, even if it were to all fall to ruin, he would have always fought for this moment.
And then the moment ended as he heard the door creak open, the sound soon followed by Haruhi’s soft, “Oh. I guess that explains why you were taking so long.”
Kyoya had no idea who pulled away first, but the result was that Tamaki was hiding his flushed face against Kyoya’s neck and Kyoya was attempting to fix his crooked glasses as he cleared his throat and looked at Haruhi’s amused expression. It was not an expression Kyoya had expected, and some of his thoughts must have shown on his face because Haruhi only gave him a small smile, “You know, I’m not the best with emotions and relationships, but… it’s kind of obvious, don’t you think?”
Haruhi, who was looking at him with the same look she gave to Tamaki, something filled with warmth and fondness and care, shook her head, “Really, Kyoya-senpai. Aren’t you supposed to be the smart one out of us?” And…
Ah.
Things had changed so rapidly that there were changes even Kyoya had missed. He had made the mistake of falling for the only two people he would ever want, but… it seemed as if it was a shared mistake.
Glancing down at Tamaki, who had peeked up to look at him with a wide expression full of hope, Kyoya found himself laughing as tension drained out of him, the wall and Tamaki the only two things keeping him up.
“Haruhi, why don’t we all take a seat?” Hand still in Tamaki’s hair, Kyoya gently played with the strands as he watched Tamaki and Haruhi share one of those looks that screamed of feelings shared and returned. The looks didn’t waver for so much as a moment as they looked back at him. “I believe the three of us have some things to discuss that could be mutually beneficial.”
Haruhi rolled her eyes with a snort as Tamaki burst into laughter against his neck, Kyoya feeling more emotion that he had ever felt. He felt emotions that he had never felt. He felt light, and hopeful, and like for a moment, just this one more moment, everything could work.
Things were changing, and he would always worry about that, but for a moment, a single moment, he let his hope outweigh his worry.
Five
Kyoya almost wanted to laugh when he noticed the latest change within the Host Club walls. While their friends had yet to see what had changed between him, Tamaki, and Haruhi, it seemed their regulars had sharper eyes than most. Then again, Kyoya supposed, those girls always were on the hunt for a good, dramatic love story. He didn’t think they had caught on to the full… circumstances, yet, but they had noticed the changes in behavior.
It was hard not to, really, by just looking at how Tamaki and Haruhi now acted towards one another. Renge and her merry hoard of accomplices and nuisances were watching with an intensity that didn’t befit the scene they were studying; that scene being Tamaki and Haruhi talking softly and teasing each other.
It was no longer an uncommon sight as the days went by, but Kyoya could see that it was quite the change from how the two had used to act, Tamaki over-the-top and full of dramatic motions while Haruhi snubbed him at every turn. Now the two were relaxed and open, Tamaki no less charming, but no longer pushing into his role of ‘prince.’ Haruhi, on her part, was completely open to Tamaki, looking up at him with warm looks and fond smiles.
Besides, it was far too amusing to watch Tamaki tuck away some stray hair behind Haruhi’s ear, these days. Before she would have laughed or rolled her eyes, but now she flushed, pink lighting up her cheeks in a way that was becoming more and more familiar.
“Kyoya-senpai?” Trying not to startle, Kyoya looked back at the customers he had been speaking with, putting on an apologetic smile. “Is everything alright?”
“You must forgive me, ladies, I let my attention wander away. I must confess I have no idea what came over me, seeing as it should be impossible for anyone to look away from such lovely ladies as yourselves.” The three girls in front of him were flustered and tittering at once, Kyoya resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Honestly, the things he said and did to please Tamaki’s mad dream somedays.
“That’s alright, Senpai, we don’t mind,” one of them -- Ritsa Hana -- seemed utterly and completely enchanted. Kyoya let her talk as he took one more look back at Tamaki and Haruhi, still teasing each other. They would never truly change, would they? “We actually wanted to ask you if there have been any recent updates to the online store.”
Ah, then again, Kyoya did so love his job some days. It was quirk work to sell the girls at least half a dozen things each and subscribe them to the newsletter he sent out with updates, future events, and new items for sale. He was even able to block out Renge and some of the regulars shouting and screaming to themselves, no doubt due to the change in behavior from Tamaki and Haruhi. They weren’t exactly subtle.
By the time the girls were walking off in a daze, Kyoya went to turn his attention back to Tamaki and Haruhi only to find Haruhi standing in front of him, very clearly pouting. Kyoya couldn’t have stopped his laugh even if he wanted to. “May I help you with something, Haruhi?”
“Our ‘prince’ is too smug,” Haruhi complained, flush still across her cheeks as they both glanced back to where Tamaki did indeed seem smug and delighted. “I was wondering if I would face any repercussions if I pushed him out a window.”
“Well now, I suppose that depends,” Kyoya chuckled, just barely resisting the urge to reach down and press a soft kiss to Haruhi’s forehead. It was terrifying how overpowering the urge to be so affectionate with the two of them were. “Would this be a window off the ground floor or one of the windows of our lovely club room?”
Haruhi grinned, giving a careless shrug, “I suppose it depends on how much more annoying he can get before I finally snap.” Kyoya rolled his eyes, knowing he was about to lose when that soft pout was on him once again. “Can you at least get him to lay off when Renge is here screaming about love triangles?”
“Ah, I thought I heard her say something to that effect.” He supposed it was simply enough to see how she had drawn that conclusion, all things considering. “Alright, I’ll go talk to him. Check on the group that just walked in, please?”
Haruhi was beaming and off at once, Kyoya not bothering to dampen his smile as he walked over to Tamaki, who was bidding goodbye to a few girls before he was perking up at seeing him. Before he could speak and make excuses, Kyoya clucked his tongue, “Don’t even think about it. You know just as well as I do how Renge and those girls are.”
Tamaki, instead of pouting or complaining, only laughed as he smiled at him, “Well, now, it’s hardly my fault that Haruhi is just too cute to resist teasing. As far as I can recall from the weekend, you seem to think the same, hm?”
“You hush,” Kyoya tried to scold, a smile winning out once again. Honestly, others might start to believe him deathly ill at all the smiling he was doing these days. “At least torment her less when our customers have decided to use us as their new entertainment.”
“Hm, I could,” Tamaki mused, inching closer and giving Kyoya a warm, fond look that he was far, far too weak towards. “But you have to admit… a love triangle between the hosts is a fantastic way to get more customers coming in.”
Kyoya opened his mouth, closed it, and then huffed out a laugh as he gently laid a hand on Tamaki’s chest and pushed him back, “You’re lucky you just so happen to be right. Now go entertain your customers, ‘Your Highness.’”
“As you wish,” Tamaki giggled, Kyoya knowing that if they were anywhere else the other would have had no qualms about reaching up and kissing him on the cheek. Kyoya was rather disappointed that they weren’t anywhere else at that moment.
Shaking the thought off as he watched Tamaki leave, Kyoya looked around the room and paused as he caught Renge’s eye, the girl hiding behind her teacup and blinking at him with wide, surprised eyes and…
Ah.
Renge was many things, but a fool was not one of them. She knew people, and he was certain she had seen the three of them interact. It wouldn’t take her long to piece things together and, if she knew, no doubt others would figure it out as well.
Things were changing yet again, Kyoya mused to himself, well cared for fear pushing its way up. He didn’t regret his choices -- he could never regret Tamaki and Haruhi and the care he had for them -- but, well… Their relationship wasn’t exactly of a common type, and there was even more strain when one considered that both he and Tamaki came from high standing families.
That, at least, was a problem for another time. For the moment he had those he cared for close and in the same room, Tamaki and Haruhi laughing and happy, his friends safe and enjoying themselves, and the day proceeding just as the days before.
Things were changing, and he would be lying to say he wasn’t terrified of where it could go, but for the moment, just a single moment, he was content.
Plus One
It wasn’t until the rest of their friends had fled out of Tamaki’s bedroom with the intent to ‘get breakfast’ -- which truly meant they would be gossiping the morning away -- that Haruhi burst out into smothered giggles and snorts. Kyoya couldn’t blame her, really. It was rather amusing how utterly oblivious their friends could be to developing and evolving relationships when they were part of a host club.
“Did they really not know?” Tamaki pouted, throwing himself against Kyoya and nuzzling at his neck in a way that had Kyoya forcing down a blush. “I thought everyone knew! Our love is a shining beacon-”
Haruhi, who had been calming down, burst out into renewed laughter, Kyoya fighting a laugh himself at Tamaki’s ‘glare.’ It had all the force of a wet kitten. Haruhi, still giggling, leaned in against Kyoya’s other side. “Is it really that surprising? You all can be oblivious.”
“I take offense to that,” Kyoya frowned, not liking Haruhi’s sudden look. It was filled with past annoyance, amusement at his expense, and a growing sense of fondness.
“Really? This coming from you?” Oh? And just what did that mean- “You almost got into a fist fight with Tamaki where you kept trying to sacrifice yourself so we could be happy.” Ah, well, he supposed he had done something along those lines.
Thinking for a moment, Kyoya nodded to himself before swiftly standing up. It was more amusing than it probably should have been to see both of his partners collapse backwards and into each other; especially with Tamaki’s squawk of outrage and Haruhi’s indignant squeak. They were adorable, truly.
“Well, then, since we’re awake, we might as well prepare for the day,” Kyoya said simply, adjusting his glasses and trying to hide his smirk.
“Kyoya,” Tamaki whined, long and loud and drawn-out while Haruhi chose to merely grumble under her breath. Kyoya was rather sure he heard some swears from her that would have horrified her father.
Taking a moment to look at the two fondly as Haruhi struggled to get up after Tamaki, still whining, had latched onto her, Kyoya shook his head with a soft, “It makes sense, I suppose, that our friends never had it fully figured out.”
Haruhi was the first to pause, looking at him curiously as she stopped her struggles, “You think? I mean… we weren’t very subtle about everything, really.”
“Of course not!” Tamaki declared, cupping Haruhi’s cheek and bringing her in closer to softly kiss the other one. “I could never keep my feelings for the two of you a secret!”
“We know,” Haruhi grumbled, cheeks flushed a soft, warm pink as she tried to bite back a smile. “One of the reasons all of our customers seem to think there’s a love triangle going on between us.”
“It makes sense,” Kyoya pointed out, half-wondering if he should try to free Haruhi from Tamaki’s grasp. He decided against it since the two made quite a wonderful image to admire. “From an outside perspective, even if one weren’t quite fully aware of Haruhi’s secret, then it would only be logical for the two of you to end up together.”
“We do make a rather amazing couple,” Tamaki preened, giving Haruhi another kiss that she didn’t even seem to register. Instead, she was frowning, staring straight at Kyoya with that look -- that look he had always seen on both hers and Tamaki’s faces before they saw through him as if he were glass.
“Kyoya… why do you think people would assume it was Tamaki and I who would end up together?” The warning tone in Haruhi’s voice had Tamaki tensing, his smile falling as he looked between Haruhi and Kyoya and ah… he wasn’t going to come away well from whatever corner Haruhi was backing him into. “Even before we were all dating you and I spent just as much time together.”
“Yes, well… I wasn’t exactly forthcoming in how I felt about you -- even from a perspective as merely friends.” Kyoya resisted the urge to look away, knowing it would look like guilt, but, well… He had been awfully eager to push Haruhi away as much as he could in the beginning. “I was also rather… harsh-”
“Because you were scared of how much you cared,” Tamaki interrupted, starting to frown as he finally let Haruhi go. He had that damn expression, the one that showed that for all his energy and careless remarks, he watched others far, far too closely. “Isn’t that what you did with me, once?”
Kyoya refused to flinch even as the memories swept through him, flashes of fear and affection and terror of that affection and trying to destroy what had become one of the best things in his life. “An unrelated point to what we were discussing-”
“No, I think it’s perfectly related.” Haruhi stood up and walked straight towards him, Kyoya mentally swearing at himself when he took a stumbling step back. Just as he expected, Haruhi narrowed her eyes at him. “You said it made sense. The others not figuring out that all three of us were in a relationship. You said it made sense. Why?”
Right. The most important thing was to not show any sort of unease, to look Haruhi in the eye, and to absolutely lie through his teeth. “Haruhi. Have you met our friends? They’re idiots.”
“If that were the case then you would have said that to begin with, but instead you brought up how it was logical for Tamaki and me to end up together.” Ah, right. Haruhi was studying to one day be a lawyer. Dammit. “Kyoya…”
“Haven’t I already explained?” Kyoya rolled his eyes, trying to appear relaxed and amused and ignore the growing feeling of unease. “From an outside perspective-”
“Meaning the customers,” Haruhi interrupted, not giving him an inch of mercy. “You were talking about our friends. They don’t have an outsider perspective, not when they know us and see us every day.”
Kyoya remained silent, half-wondering if there was a way he could dig himself out of the grave he had made for himself when he saw Tamaki stand up. It was an effort to not take any more steps back as Tamaki stopped right in front of him, the same stubborn look as Haruhi reflected on his face.
There was a moment of silence, Kyoya preparing himself for anything except for the soft hand that cupped his cheek. “Kyoya,” Tamaki near whispered, sounding upset. “Stop trying to stay in that frame.”
For a moment, just the one, Kyoya couldn’t breathe. Instead, he thought of his brothers, and his place in his family, and the whirlwind that was Tamaki Suoh that had changed his life with a bright smile and an even brighter laugh.
“You don’t see it, do you?” Haruhi had moved to be right in front of him, curled close to Tamaki even as she rested a hand on Kyoya’s chest. “Is that it? You see it as me and Tamaki and then you just added on?”
The words were too close to the unnamed feelings he refused to linger on, but judging by Haruhi’s glare and Tamaki’s brokenhearted expression, they had figured it out without him confirming it. Tamaki was the first to react, leaning in to softly kiss Kyoya’s cheek, hardly moving away even as he spoke, “Kyoya, for being so smart, you can be an awfully big idiot.”
“I don’t even want to begin to hear that from you,” Kyoya scoffed, hating how his voice cracked. He couldn’t even waste the breath to swear at himself when Tamaki was wrapping his arms around Kyoya’s shoulders and curling around his side, Haruhi leaning up to give him one of those soft, sunlight-tinged kisses.
“It’s not two of us and then the other,” Haruhi said softly, leaning back for a moment to instead cup his cheeks, meeting his gaze evenly. “That’s why the others were so confused. They saw the pieces, but not the whole thing, because…”
“It’s all of us,” Tamaki finished quietly, curling closer and shifting to rest a hand on Haruhi’s back, keeping the three of them as close as possible. “You, and me, and Haruhi. Together. You’re not…”
Tamaki trailed off, frustrated and overwhelmed before he looked to Haruhi, who smiled at Kyoya and brought him down for another soft kiss, “You’re ours just like we’re yours.”
Ah.
He had spent so long now worrying about change that Kyoya supposed he had forgotten that there was some change he didn’t need to fear. It figured, then, that it would be Tamaki and Haruhi to remind him of that.
Before Kyoya could even attempt to respond or convey that, the door was bursting open with the others rushing in with loud calls and shouts of breakfast, Kaoru the clearest with, “We brought back breakfast! We thought- Oh.”
Kyoya blinked, staring back at his four other friends who were all staring at him with looks between shock and horror, and oh, dear. Kyoya could at least see where their clear worry was coming from considering he could feel his hands and shoulders shaking with tears slipping down his cheeks. Truly, he was never going to live this moment down.
Hikaru was the first to open his mouth, Haruhi turning to look at him with a pleasant smile that spoke of a far harsher punishment than Kyoya could ever dream up, “Hikaru. If you, or anyone else, say even one word, then I will not be responsible for what happens to you. Okay?”
There was a long moment of silence, Mori nodding with a simple, “Understood.” Kyoya was then rather sure that he began dragging the others out into the hall, but it was rather hard to tell when Tamaki was distracting him with soft, shy kisses that were making him forget more and more why he had ever bothered to worry to begin with.
Finally, though, as the only remaining voice of reason, Kyoya managed to gather himself. “We should, ah, probably head down for breakfast.” His voice was weaker than he wanted it to be and his will even weaker than that.
“We could,” Haruhi drew out, a mischievous smile on her face as she tugged him back down as soon as Tamaki loosened his grip. “Or we could spend a while in here reminding you just how much you're loved and cherished. Tamaki?”
“A wonderful plan, Haruhi!” Tamaki beamed and Kyoya didn’t even get a chance to argue before the two were drowning him in love and care and adoration and relief and, well…
Drowning wasn’t such a bad way to go, he supposed.