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Harry stood nervously outside the closed dining room door. He knew anyone who saw him would assume he was trying to listen in on the Order's meeting, but he couldn't even focus on the barely audible words. His true motives crowded his thoughts, making everything else seem unimportant. Which was rather stupid, really, seeing as this was nothing compared to the fact that Voldemort was out there and nobody but the Order, his friends, and Dumbledore even believed him. Still, his palms were sweating and his heartbeat was erratic. He'd finally made up his mind – he was going to tell Sirius that he was bisexual.
He shouldn't be so nervous. Nobody he'd told had reacted badly, though Ron had been a bit awkward for a few days. Harry didn't understand why the fact that he fancied blokes should make Ron think he suddenly fancied him and every other guy they knew, but Ron had gotten over it quickly enough. Of course, Harry hadn't brought up the fact that he thought Ron's brother Bill was smoking hot, but he figured there wasn't a need to say anything about it now. Hermione had been the one to introduce him to the word “bisexual”. He'd hesitantly mentioned that he understood all those girl fawning over Cedric Diggory one day in the library, as they'd looked up ways he may be able to survive an hour underwater. She'd blinked at him owlishly.
“Do you... Harry, do you fancy him?”
Harry had felt the heat rising, blooming in his face. “I... well I don't... that is, I-”
“I thought for sure you fancied Cho.”
“I do. I mean... Well, you can fancy more than one person at a time, can't you?” Hermione had blinked at him again before rushing off and returning with a book a few minutes later.
“I know we need to figure out a plan for the second trial, so we'll only focus on this for a few minutes. It's important to know who you are, and admittedly I haven't spent much time researching sexuality.”
Fred and George had found out on their own, when they'd caught him eyeing two of the Durmstrang boys in the courtyard. They'd plopped down on either side of him and asked which of the two of them he thought was hotter. The following conversation was more of argument between the twins about which of them was “more bang-able,” and in the end Harry had never had to answer. Every once and a while they'd bring it up again, but he never had to do more than laugh and smile as they bickered.
So he had no reason to be nervous. Sirius would be supportive, just like he'd always been. Everything would be absolutely fine.
Yet Harry couldn't get Dudley's voice out of his head. Who's Cedric, your boyfriend? Harry had been angry because Cedric's death was still recent, the memories still raw and agonizing. But he'd also been mad because even though Cedric hadn't been his boyfriend, Harry couldn't deny that he'd wanted him to be. Dudley hadn't known about the murder; the disdain in his voice was based on the possibility of Harry having a boyfriend. Sirius wasn't anything like Dudley, but his cousin had reminded him that some people looked down on attraction towards the same gender. Just because his friends had taken it well didn't mean everyone he cared about would. What if Sirius was disgusted? What if he decided he didn't want anything to do with Harry anymore? What if –
No. No, Harry had to stop thinking like that. Sirius loved him, Sirius was closer to being family than the Dursleys ever had. Everything would be fine...
Harry tensed as he heard chairs being pushed back, footsteps, signs that the meeting had ended. He took a deep breath, his heartbeat speeding up, and raised a fist to knock. Before he could make contact, the door was pulled open. Arthur Weasley stood in the doorway, looking bemused at the sight of Harry standing there with his arm still raised.
“Harry! What are you doing? You weren't trying to eavesdrop, were you?” he questioned, frowning.
“No, I wasn't. I just... I just wanted to talk to Sirius about something.”
“Did I hear my name?” Sirius's voice came from further in the room, and Harry heard footsteps coming closer. Sirius leaned around Mr. Weasley and met his eye. “Harry! Great timing, we've just finished. Looking for something to eat? I could do with a hamburger.”
Harry hesitated before clinging to his resolve. “Actually, Sirius, I wanted to talk to you about something.” Harry glanced at the Order members still in the dining room. “Alone?”
“Of course. Let's, ah, head to the drawing room.”
Harry moved to the side to let Sirius pass him and then followed behind. As they walked into the drawing room, Harry saw Sirius glance at the family tree with distaste. He remembered when they'd talked about who had been disowned and why; Harry wouldn't be surprised if homosexuality was an offense worthy of being burned off the tapestry.
“What's on your mind, Harry?”
“Er...” Now that the moment had come, Harry wished he'd rehearsed. How did he start off? Should he just jump in, say “I'm bisexual” without any kind of prelude? Should he ease his godfather into it? He wished there was some kind of manual on the perfect way to come out.
Sirius quirked an eyebrow, smiling encouragingly. Harry took a deep breath.
“Sirius, I like guys. And girls. I'm bisexual.” Sirius's other eyebrow rose to join the first, and suddenly Harry was panicking. “I mean, it doesn't change anything, though. I'm still the same person, of course I am, and it's not like I'm suddenly going to go around-”
“Harry!” Harry stopped talking and braced himself for his godfather's reaction. “Is this what had you so worked up? I'm bisexual myself, it isn't like I'd treat you differently.”
Harry's jaw dropped. “What?”
Sirius laughed. “What, did you think you were the only one? I came out to your dad and Remus our fourth year. After that, it wasn't just the girls I was popular with.” He winked and Harry found himself laughing, a breathy, relieved sound. He'd never considered that the people around him might also be something other than straight, and knowing he wasn't alone, that Sirius knew how he felt, was liberating.
“Have a seat,” Sirius motioned to the floor, since they'd cleared out most of the furniture. “You won't believe some of the stories I can tell you. And I'll want to hear about who you're interested in as well.”
Harry blushed and raked his fingers through his messy hair in embarrassment, but sat eagerly. For the next few hours they laughed over Sirius's stories of conquests and mishaps, quietly talked about Cedric and the pain of losing him, and joked about Ron's reaction if he knew Harry fancied his oldest brother. When they were finally interrupted by Ginny, who had been sent to tell them dinner was ready, they walked out with Sirius's arm draped over Harry's shoulder, smiling like idiots.