Chapter Text
Mawi >>> orangjoe
1:51 P.M.
Mawi: Hi, Kel! ^_^
Mawi: Kelly?
Mawi: ^_^ ^_^ ^_^
Mawi: Kelster? :)
Mawi: :) :) :)
Mawi: Kels, please answer your phone.
Mawi: Kel, I am begging you.
Mawi: Kel please.
Mawi: :(
Mawi: :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(
2:05 P.M.
orangjoe: oki first of all you sent all that in the span of two minutes and I was busy doing shit
orangjoe: second of all please never call me any of those names ever again
orangjoe: they are lost to the void now
Mawi: But they’re cute… :( :( :(
orangjoe: third of all
orangjoe: disclaimer
orangjoe: I am not legally or otherwise responsible for whatever mayhem, mischief or mishaps transpire from whatever you are about to ask me
Mawi: …
Mawi: You didn’t even know what I was about to say! >:(
Mawi: And since when did you know what a legal disclaimer was?
orangjoe: wikipedia and the great courses have taught me more than school ever will
Mawi: what
orangjoe: less small talk more business
orangjoe: im running a favor service here yknow
Mawi: Okay…okay. Fine.
Mawi: Do you have a driver’s license?
orangjoe: ya. y
Mawi: oh my god
orangjoe: you get your license today tho rite
orangjoe: o
Mawi: I will not talk about it. I will not mention it. And I will not think about it. ^_^ ^_^ ^_^ ^_^
Mawi: Shame has no place in my body or mind.
orangjoe: oki sure
orangjoe: good luck with that broski
orangjoe: or siski
Mawi: broski. ^_^
orangjoe: well i’ma go tell Hero so he can catch u
Mawi: OR HOW ABOUT.
Mawi: INSTEAD.
Mawi: WE.
Mawi: can have a little driving adventure together!
Mawi: :D :D :D
orangjoe: uh
Mawi: Think about it!!!
Mawi: You and me.
Mawi: On the road.
Mawi: The sound of city pop barely audible in our ears as the rush of wind lowers our body temperature
Mawi: Without a care in the world except balancing the bags of Five Guys and jellybeans I want to buy.
Mawi: Does that not sound ideal, Kel?
Mawi: I am running out of nicknames for you. Can you tell?
orangejoe: now i know why u need meds you typed that all out in two minutes
orangjoe: also is that allowed?
Mawi: yes.
Mawi: I need to drown my sorrows with poor dietary choices.
orangjoe: yo that’s what I’m talking about Mari we love drowning our sorrows to the point of no return
Mawi: ???
orangjoe: dw abt I gotchu also I never said that
orangjoe: just need hero’s keys I don’t have a car
Mawi: HE HAS A CAR???
Mawi: AND HE DIDN’T TELL ME???
Mawi: ;-; ;-; ;-; ;-; ;-;
orangjoe: okay it’s our dad’s but it got loaned to him bc golden child privileges
orangjoe: but dw abt it just sit tight
orangjoe: i got dis
Mawi: Thank you so much, Kelzie!
orangjoe: mari I’m begging you Aubrey and one of her friends learns one of those and it’s over for me I’m gonna have to move
orangjoe >>> Hero
2:20 P.M.
orangjoe: bro where r your car keys
Hero: With no supervision?
Hero: Not in a hundred years.
Hero: Not in a thousand years.
Hero: Not in a million years.
orangjoe: oka I get it
orangjoe: we doig this the hard way then
Hero: We are not doing this any way, Kel.
Hero: Please come home and taste test this new PB&J recipe I made. :)
orangjoe: oh god mari infected you with the emoticon virus
Hero: My symptoms are manageable as of now, but yes. ^_^
Hero: Now, what could you possibly need my car keys for?
orangjoe: i could ask you the same thing brother
Hero: Well, I need to go pick up Mari when she fails her driver’s test.
orangjoe: o
orangjoe: ah
Mawi >>> orangjoe
2:25 P.M.
orangjoe: are you sure you don’t want hero to pick you up
Mawi: If I have to look Hero in the eye today in my shame I’m going to cry.
Mawi: You have the power to stop that, Kel.
orangjoe: yknow what okayy
orangjoe created a group chat
2:37 P.M.
orangjoe added bunbunsmom, babil and snoy to the chat
bunbunsmom: No.
orangjoe: hear me out
bunbunsmom: No. ^_^
orangjoe: not you with the fucking emoticons too
bunbunsmom: I’m busy court jester.
orangjoe: With W H A T
snoy: mario kart
snoy: you are my only friend left kel
snoy: i hate the rest of you and I will have my revenge
babil: I’m sorry sunny,,,
babil: I couldn’t stop the blue shell,,,
snoy: defective meat shield
snoy: I’m kidding basil I appreciate you very much
babil: ^_^
bunbunsmom: if I let you win sunny can we play kirby star allies
snoy: fine
snoy: we’ll play mid if I win
orangjoe: F U C K E R S.
orangjoe: I have a job for you.
bunbunsmom: what dumb shit are you doing that we’re only vaguely being a part of now
orangjoe: I promise it’s not dumb
orangjoe: or at least not my fault this time
babil: What did I tell you guys about getting into shenanigans???
orangjoe: don’t turn on me like this bapil
orangjoe: all I know is mari failed her driver’s test
snoy: r e a l s h i t
orangjoe: and she would rather Roblox oof than stare hero in the face cuz of her saiyan pride
orangjoe: so I need a distraction so I can nab the keys from hero
snoy: so long as I walk the umbral plains
snoy: mari will never live getting her license after kel down
bunbunsmom: on one hand mari favoritism
bunbunsmom: on the other hand
bunbunsmom: what do we get out of it
orangjoe: do you want five guys
snoy: T_T
bunbunsmom: T_T
Bapil: T_T
orangjoe: what does this mean
orangjoe >>> Kim
3:01 P.M.
Kim: ever wondered how getting wordlessly ditched by your friends after watching them ignore you for a completely different conversation for 5 minutes feels
Kim: bitch
orangjoe: welcome to the club it has happened more times than i remember
orangjoe: do you want five guys
Kim: you have now earned my favor.
orangjoe: go distract my brother and steal his car keys
Kim: PETTY THEFT FR???
orangjoe: ya that’s what everyone else is doing
Kim: My shit Kelster. You have made up for everything. You are treating me.
orangjoe: god damnit how do you know about keister
Mawi >>> orangjoe
orangjoe: i hope u know I owe 7 ppl Five Guys now
orangjoe: maybe 8 when Hero finds out
Mawi: I envy your ability to escalate a situation in such short notice.
Mawi: But only a little bit.
orangjoe: we will discuss my pay rates soon.