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I failed you.
Flickers of past and present merged as Even ran towards the nearest body, agony in his ageing knees unfelt as he crashed to the floor to lift their head onto his lap. Too many times had this same scene panned out, ever with different players. Scalding tears blurred his vision. Blood trickled beside the figure's mouth, and as a desperate, ungloved thumb swiped it away, the figure coughed. Scrunched eyes gradually opened to reveal their cerulean hues. Gentle was the hand set upon his cheek, soon to be coated with tears.
“Even...”
I couldn't save you...
Eyelids clenched tightly against the horrors of the room, the depths of his own heart. He refused to witness their pained expressions, mocking him from death. They always returned to him amidst his dreams anyway. Grieving fingers smoothed tenderly through messy hair. He'd promised, on her dying breath, to keep her son safe, and he couldn't even do that.
“Even, I'm alright.”
Only when the hand stayed at his cheek, retained its warmth long after it should have fled, did he finally allow himself to crack open an eyelid. Still the hair beneath his hold was warm, the figure's face dry. Startled eyes darted to the other hand, certain it was stained a sticky red, but it too was clean.
“I'm unharmed,” Ienzo's knowing smile stared up him, fondness which had vanished for all but Lexaeus over the years alive in his eyes, “I promise.”
Longer than usual, a decisive sniff filled the air, followed by the clearing of his throat as Even covered his eyes. Ienzo's warm weight left the cradle of his hand only to embrace him with steady arms. Only through the silent, unrelenting reassurance did he finally dare to cast his attention to the room's other occupants.
Aeleus and Dilan were where they always seemed to be after these events, strewn about the floor nearest the portal apparatus. A closer examination of another revealed that fiery locks were not pulled into a loose ponytail that fell down a slender back, but soft spines free to strike fear into men's hearts. Neither were short green curls actually present in the empty corner, nothing more than a toppled plant, their 'body' its shattered pot.
Not a drop of blood mottled the dusty floors. There had been no explosion this time, no unforeseen fault in their calculations which had run smoothly for years. Nor had they worked on one whose heart rejected all they tried in a violent burst of light since that day – the day he lost it all. Why had they let Subject X convince them to continue their efforts?
But deep in his heart, he already knew the answer. She'd wanted so badly to remember what she lost that she was willing to try, again and again, to endure all of their gruelling experiments. She'd practically founded their research on the link between memory and the heart! Alas, they never recovered what she was missing before she vanished like the rest of them.
Deep lines marred his skin where a dampened hand shifted to cover his chin. That niggling notion that told him something nearby was just the piece he needed, on the cusp of a breakthrough, tickled at the back of his brain. Was it yet another being who should be present but wasn't? Who was unaccounted for? He had no time to think on it as he was guided to the exit by a tug on his sleeve.
“We'll rest for today, then regroup in the morning.” Ienzo had grown into such a fine young man, and a worthy successor, decisive and cunning and receptive to his needs. If only he'd observed his growth with the same pride he harboured now. “Come, I'll make you some tea.”
Even could only nod dully as he was led away, appeased by the faint groans of the others and reassurances that they would join them soon. Somewhere along the line, they would find their answers. Surely.