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“My Mom already doesn’t like you.”
“She doesn’t?” Miriam mutters to herself again, kicking a stray rock from the pavement on her way home from Mei’s window.
Frustratingly, Miriam already had a feeling Mrs. Lee didn’t, what with how she was always the one Mrs. Lee's eyes lingered on a second too long than the others. Or how it was always Mr. Lee who had to invite her along to dinner, or how Priya and Abby always felt a tad more comfortable in the room with Mrs. Lee than she ever could.
It was awkward. And had too many implications she wasn’t in the mood to consider.
Huffing, Miriam adjusts her school bag and lets her skateboard fall from her arm to the ground. She hops on (with a bit more force than she usually does), and skates the remaining way home. Her eyebrows furrow periodically, before letting out a breath, and then her eyebrows would furrow again, and then a calming breath, and the cycle continues. A passersby would think of her weirdly, Mrs. Lee would think it was weird, and that made her cycle just add groaning into the mix.
By the time she got home, her mind was just as conflicted. Though her household didn’t take their shoes off inside, she was always diligent in removing hers the second she steps inside Mei’s house. Though she hated taking off her toque anytime someone demanded it from her, when Mei would ask, it was already off before Mrs. Lee could greet them (but Mei always nudged her with a grin to wear it back once they were far from her mother’s eyesight.)
Her room wasn’t as tidy as Mei’s. Stray clothes cover the floor, her flannels sit on the back of her study chair, and her desk could never look as pretty as Mei’s. Was that it? Miriam rolls her eyes, dropping her bag beside her bedside table, falling face-first onto her bed.
She didn’t get why it bothered her so much. To have the quiet bad feeling inside her be confirmed sucked. Maybe it’s because they both wore green, she wheezes a pathetic laugh to herself. Miriam could try other clothes, but that thought falls flat within milliseconds, she could never. Mei had always said green looked so pretty on her, that it matched her hair and eyes. Maybe Mrs. Lee didn’t like her because of how she looked then. That was a bit too hard to swallow though, because while she could begrudgingly confess she cares what Mei’s mother thought of her, she valued Mei’s more.
After a while, she rolls on her back and kicks her shoes off. The glow in the dark stars her brothers had put up glowed only faintly now. She should replace them. Or at least dust off her ceiling. She thinks back to Mei’s ceiling if she cleaned them up just as regularly as the temple.
Focus.
Miriam hums, thinking back to today. It was actually pretty dirty. Paw prints, red fur, pink dust residue, and the like filled her room, she recalls and stops. That wasn’t her room, was it? No, she’s sure it was. That was the window she and the girls had run straight for after school ended. Crap, how did it get that dirty? Mei was gone for like, a day or two.
She sits up, worrying at her upper lip. Did Mei do all that? She sees herself in the mirror of her clothes drawer and looks at herself with a deadpan expression. Of course it was Mei, was there any other giant red panda who could leave tracks like that? Dummy.
But then that would mean she was running around high enough to reach the ceiling. She saw those paw marks litter the room, and with Panda Mei’s size she couldn’t be that agile to even hit those high spots. Did she smack herself with the wall or something? Miriam snickers. And then her heart drops just as fast as the laugh leaves her. She could have. That was probably why Mei’s fur was so messed up when she and the girls went, her whiskers (were those whiskers?) were bent, and one of her ears was flatter than the other. A wall could definitely do that.
Miriam sniffs, feeling the same ache she felt in her chest when Mei started crying in her panda self. She pulls her toque down to her eyes, recalling Mei’s sad voice. Mei’s whimpers, Mei curling into herself and helplessly holding onto Wilfred like her life depended on it. Mei’s voice breaking when she sang. Mei cheering up, Mei dancing, Mei hugging them. Mei.
Ugh. Maybe Mrs. Lee didn’t like her cause she was so nosy, how ‘bout that?
Miriam stifles the rebuttal in her head. She was so much more nosy in Mei’s life though. She refuses to add “rude” to the most likely long list Mrs. Lee has on why she doesn’t like her.
What was she even doing in a room that bare? Oh, she knows that tone Mei has when she’s excited. Get her room back? Where did they even hide that big headboard? Her house could barely fit her family, did they just have a spare room to hide a headboard or something?
She shakes her head. Focus.
Miriam slumps in her bed, crossing her arms indignantly. How could Mrs. Lee just let her stay with only Wilfred, she already had trouble sleeping with minimum 3 of her stuffed toys. But… well, if someone was that fluffy, do they even need stuffed toys anymore? She laughs.
Mei was so soft. She stank a bit, but not as harshly as Mei thought she smelled. She probably would have done the same as Abby in feeling her fur if she wasn’t so focused on how Mei’s eyes looked exactly the same, even if it had fear in them.
Her best friend was a big red panda! Miriam grins, adjusting her toque back to her bangs. A big soft cuddly red panda. That was so cool! Plus, she had red hair now! (She glances at her mirror again, tugging on her braid.) It fit her so well. Did Mei like it? She hid it really well with a toque, so did she not? Maybe she could ask her parents if she could dye her hair too. Would she look as pretty in red though? Would Mei wanna match? Mei would definitely love to, Miriam nodded to herself.
“Miriam? Are you home?” Her mother yells out from downstairs, “The door was unlocked. I told you to lock it when you get home first!”
Jumping up from her bed to yell back a casual “Sorry!”, she takes a deep breath. She could settle on matching with Mei and their 4*Town shirts. To do that, she has to get her parents on board first. Besides, the only permission she needed tonight was from her parents.
So what if Mrs. Lee didn't like her? Miriam didn't need Mrs. Lee's permission to be by Mei's side, panda or no panda.