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The Curse That I Bear
The Chasm was quite a mysterious place, the Cavalry Captain of Mondstadt thought to himself. The Chasm simply hit close to home… well…Khaenri’ah really except this appeared to be a different ancient civilization from the undergrounds. Nonetheless, Kaeya was feeling nostalgic in a sorrowful kind of way. Khaenri’ah’s destruction left permanent scarring to Kaeya’s mind, possibly for the rest of his life. But here he was, exploring the once thriving civilization with three of seven archons that were responsible for Khaenri’ah’s destruction. Respectively, they were Venti, the anemo archon, Zhongli, the geo archon, and Ei, the electro archon. He grew to forgive each and everyone of them once he figured out that they played a part in the annihilation. After all, his hard work as Mondstadt's Cavalry Captain proved his loyalty to Teyvat. It was a matter of stopping the new renowned traveler’s brother from trying to restore Khaenri’ah. Kaeya didn’t need his homeland to be restored. It didn’t need to be revived really, it was in complete annihilation with little to nothing left of its legacy, but it was capable of being restored. Kaeya had his past traumas and was even assigned a mission by his father who abandoned to spy on Mondstadt. One day, his past will catch up to him which will force him to make a decision to question where his loyalties truly lie. Be in favour of Mondstadt or Khaenri’ah. Kaeya wasn’t worried about his loyalty, simply because he knew where he truly belonged. He was more worried about his Khaenri’ahn curse.
All Khaenri’ahns were born with it, even Kaeya. Kaeya never revealed to people besides the archons and his brother Diluc about his origins. He knew the language of the wandering hilichurls and monsters around Teyvat. They are his people that have succumbed to the Khaenri’ahn curse and lost touch with their former lives, wandering around the seven nations to cause trouble. Kaeya being one of the sole survivors of Khaenri’ah would one day succumb to the curse as well. He’d lose any sense of his soul and his identity, letting the curse consume his soul until the life that was once him had “died”. One day, he’d forget all the close bonds he’s formed with his friends in Mondstadt. He’d forget the kind Ragnvindr family that took him under his wing after he was abandoned. He’d lose everything he once was, transforming into a vessel that would make him into a monster just like the hilichurls.
“There’s a cave down this way!” Venti exclaimed, pointing to a hollow dark tunnel. The Chasm was a dark and miserable place despite its unique history. It reeked of dark and murky looking mud, but it had luminescent stones to light its way through dark places. Kaeya takes out the lumenstone and guides his team deep into the tunnel.
“I never realized there were many ancient civilizations in the abyss. Its legacy is eternal,” Ei comments, glancing around in awe.
“It truly is fascinating,” Zhongli adds.
Kaeya says nothing, only questioning what he was truly feeling in the moment. Kaeya didn’t know what or how to feel. Places bearing an image of destruction brings him back to his homeland. When he realized all the monsters that were released into Teyvat 500 years ago were his people, he knew he was wearing their blood on his hands when he knew he had to kill them to protect Teyvat. He wondered if he were committing genocide by hurting every hilichurl to abyss mage. It hurt him inside that he was killing his own people, often contemplating if what he was doing was even right. He was protecting Mondstadt but murdering his own people in order to do so.
It was hard to find anyone to talk to about his struggles. The archons were far too busy looking after their nations. As for Diluc, Kaeya wasn’t on the best terms with his older brother. When Diluc found out about his origins, he tried to kill him and disowned him from the Ragnvindr family following their father’s death. Kaeya was left abandoned by him as Diluc spends four years across Teyvat to follow his own path. When he returned to Mondstadt, Diluc was distant from Kaeya, often refusing to acknowledge any hints of their past. Kaeya pretended to be fine with the distance, but the person he needed the most chose to remain distant from him.
It was only recently the two tried to at least reconcile while keeping a fair distance apart. They weren’t exactly as close as they used to be, but they both knew deep down inside they cared for each other. The only thing Kaeya left out when telling Diluc about his origins was his curse. But he knew Diluc would eventually have to know, even if it hurts their relationship even more. Kaeya knew Diluc was never pleased with Kaeya keeping secrets from him. Kaeya didn’t blame him really. It was a matter of how he’ll react when he tells him about his Khaenri’ahn curse. It didn’t matter to Kaeya if Diluc hated him again. It’s not like their relationship isn’t already strained because he was going to die in the end. Maybe Diluc could finally have his wishes for wanting Kaeya dead like he did four years ago.
Kaeya never believed he was ever deserving of love after hiding his origins from the Ragnvindrs. Ever since Diluc threw him out, Kaeya believed he didn’t deserve love from anyone no matter how loved he was by everyone in Mondstadt. In the end, he didn’t belong in this world. He was an intruder, a pest perhaps in favour for Khaenri’ah, even if he decided his loyalty lies within Teyvat.
“Archons! What is this?” Venti exclaims, snapping Kaeya out of his train of thoughts.
Ei lets out a quiet gasp, Zhongli wearing a blank stare. Kaeya approaches closer to what Venti had pointed out. Kaeya’s light shines over two limp bodies of creatures all too familiar to him…hilichurls. In front of them was a flower from his own homeland…an inteyvat. What was a thing like that doing here? Then he remembered that Lumine’s brother is working with the abyss in an attempt to revive Khaenri’ah. He must’ve put that there for the hilichurls.
“What happened? Are they…” Venti begins, glancing at Kaeya as he nods somberly.
“Yes…” Kaeya responds after a few minutes of allowing the image of their dead corpses to sink in.
“I don’t understand… there’s a fresh fire right here…” Zhongli points out, glancing between the hilichurls and the warmly lit campfire.
“Want to know why hilichurls wear masks? I can be sure to tell you why…” Kaeya asks the three archons, trailing off at the end. His voice was full of dread and bitterness.
“Do share…this must be a tough sight for you to endure,” Ei tells Kaeya softly, trying to be sympathetic.
“All Khaenri’ahns such as I are born with a curse… overtime… it gets worse. Hilichurls wear those masks to hide their faces if they ever caught sight of it in waters or mirrors. If they ever saw this reflection….it brings them despair…a horrid reminder of what they once were. Eventually…the body and the soul will erode away slowly like what corrosion does…” Kaeya explains, knowing that could be his potential fate once his curse catches up to him. What a truly sorrowful way to go. “My curse has been slow over these years but recently…it does seem to be acting up a little. But…down here in this Chasm…I feel at peace…for once in my life…”
“So…why retreat to a place like this?” Venti asks, tilting his head.
“Their instinct probably forced them to find a dark and quiet corner to die in peace…this place of all places would certainly ease the effects of their painful curse,” Kaeya answers him. Kaeya never liked the dark. In fact, he hated the dark unless the dark invited a warm and peaceful atmosphere.
“So…why exactly was this fireplace lit here?” Ei asks him, since Hilichurls would typically prefer dark places.
“Perhaps…they wanted to feel one last feeling of light and warmth before they passed…” Kaeya tells her, walking back towards the inteyvat. He leans down to pick up the flower, the feeling of his distant homeland never hitting him this hard.
“What kind of flower is that Kaeya?” Venti asks, staring at the beautiful sight in awe.
“An inteyvat…a Khaenri’ahn flower. It’s hard as rock….because it was removed from its homeland. If it were to be returned to Khaenri’ahn…the petals of the flowers will soften and wither into dust…” Kaeya frowns, holding the inteyvat close.
Zhongli, Venti and Ei could practically feel Kaeya’s sadness and grieving for Khaenri’ah. The guilt never hurt more than in the moment, knowing they were responsible for the mass destruction of Kaeya’s home. Ei saw Zhongli looking at his hands, and then clutching them in remorse for the genocide. Venti was looking at the ground, a shadow looming over his face. He’s always considered Kaeya a child of Mondstadt… yet he helped with the destruction. For Ei now learning of the Khaenri’ahn curse, it is truly an eternal suffering that any Khaenri’ahn such as Kaeya has to endure. She had no involvement in the downfall of Khaenri’ah, that was her twin sister Makoto. But she carries her fallen sister’s burden as the new shogun of Inazuma.
“Don’t apologize or feel guilty… my loyalty now remains in Teyvat, I know where I want to be… things happen…even at the cost of many innocent lives…” Kaeya tells the trio, wanting to forgive them for what they did. Even if it hurts so much to know his loyalty lies to the archons responsible for Khaenri’ah’s annihilation.
Kaeya turns back to the hilichurls and puts the inteyvat back in front of them. He gives them a little send off prayer, hoping they were finally at peace before standing and turning towards the exit of the cave. Kaeya could feel emotions in his chest growing heavy. Even if the curse in the Chasm was finally relaxing on him, reminders of his homeland kept playing in his head like a reel. The day of the cataclysm was too terrifying for Kaeya to replay again and again.
The silence between the four thickened, Kaeya wishing to cast his past on his mind aside. He didn’t want the archons to pity him nor feel guilty for what Celestia ordered them to do in the first place. It wasn’t entirely their fault, even if they had a choice to go against Celestia’s wishes. Forgiveness towards the archons was truly Kaeya’s reason to fully find his purpose in Teyvat. Even if he lamented the loss of everything he once had in Khaenri’ah. A mother and father, a kingdom who adored him, a place to call home. Now he remains here in Teyvat as one of Khaenri’ah’s sole survivors with a new world to protect, a new place he could try and call his new home no matter how much he felt like he didn’t belong.
As the four travel deeper into the caves, Kaeya notices something at the corner of his eye. It was a tall figure in dark attire, a military like appearance perhaps. Kaeya glances in the darkened direction, the only light reflecting off the figure’s form. Kaeya froze, recognizing the form exactly as it was. A Black Serpent Knight of Khaenri’ah, a windcutter specifically. The whole existence of that serpent was all familiar to Kaeya, yet he couldn’t figure out who he was. This knight had the Khaenri’ahn curse fully afflicted on him, yet Kaeya got the feeling he once knew this man. A part of his mysterious aura gave off a feeling that made Kaeya wonder if this knight truly lost the spirit of his soul.
The knight turns away, disappearing into the darkened tunnels ahead, leaving Kaeya standing there skeptical. But Kaeya didn’t feel like the knight posed a threat to the group. It was a matter of who that knight was. Kaeya was beginning to dread being in the Chasm any longer. Perhaps once he’s done exploring, he’d go to the Angel’s Share and drown himself in alcohol. Diluc would probably scold him like he usually does for poisoning himself and then proceed to kick him out at closing hours. He’d rather be there than in a place such as the Chasm. It was too tiring to live with the constant reminders of his past. He wants to move on, but it's complicated because the past will come chasing him back into the dark.
Kaeya didn’t realize how lost in thought he was diving into until the walls of the Chasm shook, triggering the curse inside him. He felt a wave of pain hit his body. It felt like he was drowning in that thick and disgusting dark purple mud. But it was more than drowning, it was agony. The hilichurls with the highly afflicted curse were wailing in Kaeya’s ears. It made him and the sorrowful creatures go insane.
“Sir Kaeya?!” Venti exclaims, rushing to Kaeya’s side.
“N-no! Make it stop!” Kaeya screams, holding his head as he coughed violently.
“What’s happening?!” Zhongli asks Venti and Ei, but neither of them would know.
“Something was certainly set off in the tunnels,” Ei guessed, trying to keep Kaeya standing.
Kaeya’s vision was spinning, seeing multiple of the three archons, images of wailing hilichurls flashing in his eyes as the dark curse seeps out of their bodies. He also sees a man, a blonde haired knight in twilight clothing. The Khaenri’ahn knight uniform. He too was feeling the same agony Kaeya was. He also felt like he knew him from somewhere, reaching his arm out to try and make contact with him, only for his vision to suddenly flash back into the present.
“D-Dainsleif? The other…” Kaeya exclaims in his mind, watching the Black Serpent Knight he saw early walk towards the device triggering his curse.
“Halfdan?! What’s happening?! Why can’t you both hear me! I survived the cataclysm!” Kaeya was unable to speak to either of the two knights.
“T-The hilichurls! The curse has been triggered by something! T-They can’t die like this! They’re in pain!” Kaeya cried out, crouching to the ground. His coughing could only grow more violent, now finding it hard to breathe. He was suffocating with the curse now grasping its hands on his soul and squeezing it. Zhongli was trying to get a hold of him, but Kaeya could barely make out a word he was saying. Images and whispers were colliding in his mind all at once. Kaeya curls up on the ground into a round ball, squeezing his eyes shut tightly and feeling that only he was capable of protecting himself from the curse’s torment.
Kaeya felt like the torture would happen for an eternity, because suddenly, the voices stopped along with the pain. Kaeya opens his eyes, glancing up to see his three archons looking at him worriedly. Once he could finally feel the weight off his chest lift, he could breathe again.
“Are you alright?” Ei questions him, kneeling down at his level.
That probably was the most pain he’s felt in his life next to Diluc nearly incinerating him to death four years ago. Nothing stung more than the reminder he’s stuck with his curse until the day he dies. Kaeya’s body was stiff and frozen, his heart racing until the shock from the aftermath of the curse finally hit. He trembles in the spot, refusing to cry in front of the archons but the dam was already breaking. He had enough of being down here in the dark. He had enough of the agony and sadness, just wanting to go back to Mondstadt.
“I-I wanna leave! Now Venti! Take me back to Mond,” Kaeya exclaims, scrambling to his feet.
“A-are you sure you’re alright captain?” Venti asks him, concerned for his well-being.
“Forget it! Just get me outta here! I saw what I didn’t need to be reminded to see,” Kaeya snaps at him angrily.
Venti winces and nods, “A-alright. We’re leaving now. It’ll be okay Kaeya.”
No, it wasn’t. Not in Kaeya’s mind. Nothing was alright and nothing ever will be.
…
After reaching Mondstadt that evening, Kaeya immediately heads to the Angel’s Share for his favourite drink Death After Noon. The usual patrons like Patton and Bruce and Six-Fingered Jose were there, laughing and sharing tales of adventures. Diluc and Charles were there as well, serving these ridiculously drunk patrons.
Kaeya found it difficult to even drink his beverage. The incident in the Chasm still lingered in his mind, reminding him that he’ll never run away from his past. He was holding his glass with the tip of his finger, simply staring into the liquid of the drink, which somehow appeared looking like that dark murky mud from the Chasm. Kaeya winces a little, letting go of his drink until he blinks a couple times to realize he was simply imagining it. He lets out a huge sigh, burying his face in his hands. Existing was exhausting. Diluc takes note of his gestures, knowing there was something really off about Kaeya. He wasn’t sitting in his favourite spot for his drink, he wasn’t sitting with the other patrons having a laugh. Instead, he was sitting in the corner of the tavern, wearing a long face and staring at his favourite drink. Even if the two brothers have gone their separate ways and drifted apart, Diluc could still read Kaeya like an open book. Kaeya always knew Diluc was never open with expressing feelings as much as he used to. Kaeya doesn’t even notice Diluc walking over to him and calling his name until Diluc shakes his shoulders.
“Idiot. I am talking to you,” Diluc snaps at him a little, looking unamused.
“Oh… sorry. I was zoning out,” Kaeya sighs, his voice sounding rather dull and exhausted.
“Even the Knights of Favonius’ Cavalry Captain can be so inefficient,” Diluc scoffs. Kaeya would normally agree to disagree, but Kaeya just remained silent for a long and awkward time.
“...whatever,” Kaeya frowned, refusing to make eye contact with Diluc.
Diluc began to pick up on the signs and gestures Kaeya was making. Something wasn’t right and Kaeya was mentally and emotionally absent. As much as Kaeya can be a pain, Diluc always made the effort to look after his only family left even if Kaeya didn’t acknowledge that.
“What’s the matter Kaeya?” Diluc asks more gently, using Kaeya’s name now. Listening to Diluc’s softer voice was enough to reassure Kaeya and bring back his senses a little. He finally makes eye contact, seeing Diluc’s more gentle gaze at him, making him aware that it was safe to talk to him. Kaeya looked around the tavern, seeing it was still quite packed. Kaeya didn’t want a single patron to hear him vent about the troubles of his past. He was hesitant to even mention anything to Diluc, but he might as well know anyways.
“...Can it be in private?” Kaeya asks him.
“Of course…” Diluc nods as Kaeya stands to his feet. Diluc exchanges a glance with Charles, who nods and begins to take over his shift. Diluc could already guess what Kaeya wanted to talk to him about if he wanted this matter in private. Diluc takes him to one of the tavern’s upstairs apartments, making sure no one else was around to listen in or hear them. The two find a room, locking the door behind them and taking a seat on the bed.
“What’s wrong?” Diluc asks Kaeya again.
“The Chasms…I was there today and something happened…” Kaeya responds, his voice already straining.
“Go on,” Diluc tells him, his voice reassuring Kaeya that whatever was out there, whether it be a threat or sickness or anything that would harm Kaeya or Mondstadt, he was going to stop it.
“It’s about Khaenr’iah…I know how much you hate me for being dishonest with you. But I didn’t tell you everything that night because you were already hurt by my secret,” Kaeya replies, his eyes starting to sprinkle a little with tears he was trying to contain. Kaeya caught a glimpse at Diluc being on edge. He couldn’t blame him really, expecting him to lash out in anger or grab his throat to strangle him to death. But instead, Diluc sat up a little alarmed, all ears listening to what Kaeya had to say.
“Kaeya. Go on. I’m listening,” Diluc instructs him, catching Kaeya by surprise a little.
“You’re welcome to insult me, throw me out of the tavern, call me a traitor and,” Kaeya begins
“Enough Kaeya. You’re making me believe you’re a threat. I want to hear you out first.” There was patience in Diluc’s voice, something Kaeya wasn’t quite used to. Kaeya again, was expecting Diluc to curse at him or throw him out of the tavern, but here he was, simply listening to him and pressing him on about what he knows about Khaenri’ah.
“That’s…new…” Kaeya commented, Diluc rolling his eyes, waiting for him.
“I told you about Khaenri’ah already…but I left out the part about the curse that all Khaenri’ahns are born with,” Kaeya begins telling Diluc nervously. He keeps an eye on Diluc’s gestures and reactions, trying to pinpoint the moment he’ll snap. But he didn’t find a single sign that any word he was saying was going to set Diluc off. Diluc only gave him a skeptical look, his expression wanting to know more.
“...Hilichurls are Khaenri’ahn…as well as those other monsters that appeared across Teyvat since the cataclysm. They wear a mask to hide their reflection…it would serve as a devastating reminder that they are cursed beings. The curse itself is like a corrosion to the soul…it eats and eats away from it until we’re doomed to forget everything we once were…”
Kaeya’s voice grows heavier, as he looks at his hands imagining the bloodshed of every single hilichurl he’s slaughtered for Mondstadt’s sake.
“It’s not necessarily death…but the death of the soul of a once thriving person…in that Chasm were deceased hilichurls lying beside an inteyvat, a flower from my homelands…and I had to be reminded that these were my people born with a curse,” Kaeya trembles, finally making eye contact with Diluc again.
Diluc wished Kaeya had told him about the curse sooner. What a really harsh life he lives. The more and more Kaeya opened up about his past, the more Diluc could try and understand what he was going through. In his eyes, he saw loneliness in Kaeya’s eyes. Guilt shivered through Diluc’s body for abandoning Kaeya four years ago and throwing him out. Kaeya truly had no one else to turn to when it came to discussing his Khaenri’ahn blood. Besides the archons, only Diluc knew the truth about Kaeya’s past and he would be close enough to know the full details. Even if Diluc didn’t trust Kaeya, he knew Kaeya trusted him a lot simply because he was asking for the safety that his brother once provided for him.
“A device in the Chasm was triggered…and it triggered the severity of my curse. The hilichurls in there were wailing… they’re supposed to die in the quiet and dark corner of a room once they know the end is near… not in a painful, agonizing way,” Kaeya sniffles, wiping the tears now freely falling down his cheek.
Diluc’s brother instincts were beginning to take over, tempted to wipe all of Kaeya’s sorrow away. He resists this urge, unsure if Kaeya would want any form of physical comfort from him. The last time he laid a hand on Kaeya, it was wrapped around his throat, burning hotter than his own pyro vision. He didn’t blame Kaeya if he didn’t want to trust him as much.
“Everyday…I am reminded that this curse exists…that I can’t run away from my past. I slaughter every hilichurl, abyss mage, you name it for Mondstadt’s sake,” Kaeya whimpers, failing to resist any more tears from falling.
“I’m a murderer. I’ve killed my own people and I have to live with that every day. I’m so tired ‘Luc . I’m so tired of living…” Kaeya was now choking through tears. Kaeya froze a little, realizing he used Diluc’s childhood nickname despite Diluc disliking it in the present. On Diluc’s end, it hurt him so much to realize how much Kaeya really needed him and that he’s neglected him for the past four years.
He was seeing Kaeya as the young, trembling boy his father found in the rain on the night they first met. He made the mistake of breaking Kaeya’s trust and burning the bridge that bonded the two of them. But he wanted to be the brother he once was to Kaeya again, looking after him and giving him the comfort Kaeya needed. It was either now or never because one day, he’ll lose Kaeya forever. Diluc reaches over to wrap his protective arms around Kaeya, who pulls away, startled by his gesture.
“I don’t understand…” Kaeya shakes.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” Diluc reassures him, Kaeya really getting uncomfortable with the way Diluc was approaching him. He didn’t understand. Diluc was supposed to be angry at him, probably shoving him to the floor to choke him to death. But instead, he saw the warm and gentle eyes that Diluc used to have for him, but Kaeya believed he didn’t deserve Diluc. Not for making Diluc believe he betrayed his family and Mondstadt.
“I’m better off dead now before the curse takes me. You can kill if you want…just so I’m no longer a pest,” Kaeya curls up into the corner, holding himself. That was it. Diluc wasn’t going to have Kaeya think like that anymore.
“ Kae you listen to me right now! I will not lose you too like I already lost Father!” Diluc firmly snaps at him, grabbing Kaeya’s hands and squeezing them.
“Isn’t that what you want from me?! I-I’m a traitor! A vessel of the curse…a creature that’s meant to die. I’m going to hurt you one day…and it's already my fault I didn’t tell you in the first place about my past.”
Kaeya was in tears, clearly afraid of Diluc while simultaneously crying for help. Diluc wanted to shelter him from any monster or curse or sadness that was out to grasp him.
“Kaeya…I shouldn’t have overreacted that night. I should’ve understood why you kept your past a secret. You’ve already proven that you deeply care about Mondstadt,” Diluc calmly responds, rubbing Kaeya’s hand with his thumb to soothe him. He knew exactly what it took to comfort Kaeya in the midst of a breakdown.
“You’re not like this…” Kaeya tells him, still reluctant to fully trust him. None of what Diluc was saying could be right.
“I know…we never properly reconciled…and that’s my fault for distancing…” Diluc continues, scooting closer to Kaeya’s side. Kaeya was becoming aware that Diluc wasn’t going to leave him alone.
“But the last thing I want…is for you to wish you weren’t alive. In fact…I don’t want that at all,” Diluc caresses Kaeya’s cheek, wiping away the tears falling from his face. Kaeya was familiar with the touch. It was something he truly missed because it finally opened a safe haven for him from his past.
“B-But-,” Kaeya opens until Diluc cuts him off.
“No, Kaeya. You were just a child…I should’ve accepted that from the start…and I’m so sorry for abandoning you when you needed me the most. You do so much for Mondstadt yet you’re struggling because you feel like a murderer. I know…that must be so hard to question what is right and wrong…and I’m sorry for not being there,” Diluc apologizes softly, refusing to shed any of his own tears even though his eyes were beginning to water.
Kaeya’s eyes were wide, realizing how much he needed to hear that apology more than anything. He just wanted to be family again, to have Diluc by his side again until the end. For once in his life, he never wished for anything more than for Diluc’s brotherly love and protectiveness, to be welcomed again into the Ragnvindr family. Without another moment of hesitation, he reaches for Diluc, lunging at him with arms wrapped around his middle. His shoulder was soaking wet with Kaeya’s tears. For once in his life, Kaeya felt truly at home, embracing the warmth and love his older brother gave him. Diluc wraps his arms around his little brother, caressing the back of Kaeya’s head while using his other hand to rub Kaeya’s back gently. He missed holding Kaeya like this, especially when Kaeya relied on him to feel safe and sheltered.
“Shhh it’s okay Kae. I’m right here….I’m so sorry my little brother …I’m so sorry…” Diluc trembles, his embrace promising Kaeya he’ll never let go of him again.
“Big…brother?” Kaeya looks at him.
“Yes… I’m your brother and you’re my baby brother. Nothing is ever going to change that,” Diluc reassures him, letting Kaeya know he was loved. Diluc missed being called “Luc” and “Big Brother”. It felt nice again to have his brother back, even if it took this long to fully reconcile.
“I-I forgive you...I’m sorry too…..especially for picking the worst time to tell you everything…” Kaeya also apologizes, refusing to leave Diluc’s embrace.
“It’s alright Kaeya…it’s alright. I forgive you too…and I’m not letting anything separate us again,” Diluc squeezes Kaeya close to him, quietly letting his own tears finally shead.
“But…my curse…” Kaeya frowns, knowing it has the potential to separate them for good.
“It’s not going to keep me from you. We’ll find something…anything to stop it from spreading,” Diluc says to him reassuringly.
“T-There is no way to reverse it,” Kaeya sniffles hopelessly.
“You don’t know that yet. You may have been given that impression…not unless…we try to find a cure.”
“You’d be willing to…help me?” Kaeya asks, rather surprised.
“Absolutely…you were so young when that cataclysm happened to you…and to be abandoned by your own father with a burden placed on you…you didn’t deserve any of that torment,” Diluc tells him, running his hand through his brother’s hair.
“I just want a normal life…” Kaeya frowns, going back to burying his face in Diluc’s shoulder.
“I know…and you will have that normal life to the best I can make it. Kaeya…you’re loved more than you know by the people of Mondstadt… and me. Nothing would ever replace you if you were gone…”
“I-I am?” Kaeya asks again, wanting to be sure he heard that correctly. Diluc pulls Kaeya away, his hands on Kaeya’s shoulders so the two were making eye contact.
“Yes…Father would be so proud of you…just as I am now for what you do for Mondstadt.”
Kaeya truly felt like he was home. He was safe from anything because Diluc was there to protect him. A path to reconciliation was ready to be followed. Both brothers could see it and will take it one day at a time. It wasn’t a dream, Kaeya knew exactly where he was and where he truly belonged.
“You’ve had a long day. Let’s get you to bed. You can rest here tonight,” Diluc orders Kaeya like the responsible big brother he was.
“Alright…” Kaeya nods, letting go of Diluc and taking off his garments and uniform. Kaeya now wore some comfortable pants and a plain white shirt.
Kaeya climbs into bed, burying himself under the sheets and his head hitting the cloud, fluffy pillow. He never felt so at peace. He was caught by surprise when Diluc climbed in beside him. He then realized Diluc was going to spend the night with him like he used to all the time when they were young. Kaeya couldn’t help but smile a genuine, happy smile for the first time in four years. He wouldn’t have to sleep that night plagued with nightmares.
Diluc’s arm is slung over Kaeya’s form protectively, allowing Kaeya to fully relax and remain at peace. Diluc’s warmth began to lull Kaeya to sleep, his mind on the Khaenri’ahn curse dissipating as he focused on every second with Diluc. It was nice to feel wanted again, to have a family once more. He belonged right where he was, in Diluc’s arms. For Diluc, it was nice for him to have his brother back after all that happened. He swore to never lay a harmful hand on Kaeya ever again, promising he’d protect him and love him. The brothers had a peaceful slumber that night, both wearing the happiest smiles they once wore as children.
The only thought concerning Kaeya was his inevitable curse. It was unpredictable and could eat at him at any moment before he could stop it. One day, he’ll succumb to its raging despair and he’d completely forget who he used to be until he ceases to exist. The thoughts of his curse will always remain like a disease growing over time.
“Good night my dearest brother… I love you so much…”
That’s what Kaeya had heard from Diluc before he passed out. He’ll have his brother by his side to support him no matter what happens. He reminded himself to take moments one second at a time to make his life worth living for and maybe one day… just one day… his curse will be reversed. For now, he’ll focus on reconciling with Diluc to grow close as family again.