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Rhinedottir had always known her past would come to haunt her eventually.
She’d made too many mistakes, crossed too many lines, and angered too many people for that not to be the case. It wasn’t a question if said past would catch up with her, but when.
She just hadn’t expected for that past to come in the form of Alice, of all things.
Rhinedottir had been minding her own business for once, which these days mainly consisted of investigating old and forgotten portals to Khaenri’ah, when the woman had showed up out of nowhere.
Had Rhinedottir had a heart to speak of, she wouldn’t have been surprised to find it had stopped working from shock.
‘I knew I’d find you eventually if I just kept looking.’ Alice breathed out, walking closer before stopping a few feet away. The small cave they were in only served to amplify Alice’s already loud voice, as well as the sound of her enthusiastic footsteps.
Rhinedottir had half expected the other to pull her into a suffocating hug, yet she remained surprisingly calm and collected. Perhaps these years apart had matured her a little after all.
Or perhaps she just wasn’t all that happy to see her.
‘How did you find me?’ Rhinedottir spoke coldly after a few seconds of silence.
Alice almost seemed to give her something akin to a pout at those words, clearly not happy with them. ‘Oh come on Rhine, is that really how you greet an old friend?’
‘I need to know if there’s anyone else that could have followed me.’ she stated. ‘Or you.’
‘Underestimating my magical abilities as always, I see.’ the other brought out with a dramatic sigh. ‘You wound me, Rhine. Of course I took the necessary precautions to ensure our privacy and safety. What do you take me for?’
‘An impulsive scatterbrain with boundary issues.’
‘How nice of you.’
Rhinedottir crossed her arms, and abruptly turned away. Looking at Alice’s familiar face only forced her to remember things she’d been trying desperately to forget.
‘You haven’t answered my question.’
‘I used your map, if you must know.’ Alice murmured, surprisingly soft. ‘It’s almost like you wanted me to find you.’
‘Map…?’
‘The one with the portals on it.’ Alice explained. ‘The one you showed me…oh, what was it, 253 years ago?’
At that, Rhinedottir frantically turned around to face her once more. ‘You kept it?’ she brought out. ‘I told you that any and all evidence needed to be destroyed after we were done, and you’re telling me you kept it?!’
Rhinedottir felt rage spreading through her veins like wildfire, making her clench her fists and jaw in an attempt to control herself.
Alice and her had been friends for a long time, meaning she had entrusted her with even the darkest parts of her past. She’d even told her about the ambition to find these old portals to Khaenri’ah and investigate them; a start to rebuilding the kingdom she’d failed to protect.
Of course no one else was allowed to know, so any and all clues to the whereabouts of these portals had to be destroyed. If that information fell into the wrong hands, the Abyss Order perhaps being the most dangerous of them all, they were doomed. To think Alice had betrayed her trust like this stung, even after all those years.
‘I memorized it, Rhine.’ Alice interrupted that train of thought. ‘I didn’t keep it, I memorized it.’
‘What if they’d tortured you for information?’ Rhinedottir snapped, not as angry as before but still feeling frustrated. ‘You’ve put yourself in immense danger by coming here.’
‘I wouldn’t have told them.’ Alice said determinedly. ‘Not even torture could ever force me to put you in danger, you should know that by now.’
‘And what if they’d used Klee?’
At that, Alice turned silent for a moment, averting her gaze. Had the Abyss Order indeed used her own child against her, Rhinedottir didn’t doubt she would have told them anything they’d want to hear, even if that meant betraying her.
‘If you didn’t want me to be a liability then you shouldn’t have given me the information in the first place.’ Alice eventually answered. The enthusiastic and determined tone from before had vanished from her voice almost completely now, though she didn’t seem ready to admit defeat quite yet.
‘I suppose you’re right about that…’ Rhinedottir sighed. ‘…how is Klee, by the way…?’
A poor attempt at changing the subject really, but she never claimed to be good at small talk.
‘She’s fine.’ Alice replied, crossing her arms while still refusing to look at her. ‘How’s Albedo?’
Now that was a low blow, even for her.
‘You’d know, wouldn’t you?’ Rhinedottir huffed, walking back further into the cave to collect her things. She knelt down once she reached her bag, determined to pack her equipment as quickly as possible.
‘I bet you’re pleased to hear they’re getting along incredibly well.’ Alice said, hesitantly walking after her.
‘Guess they’ve surpassed their parental figures in that regard then, haven’t they?’ Rhinedottir replied.
Alice’s soft footsteps ceased, coming to a halt somewhat further away than she had done before, almost as if keeping her distance.
‘Are you even remotely happy to see me?’ she whispered. ‘Does it affect you at all?’
Rhinedottir sucked in a deep breath, and gripped the fabric of her bag so tightly that it crumpled. There were no words to describe how she was feeling, so the only answer she had for the other woman was silence.
A grave mistake.
‘Forget it.’ Alice brought out. ‘I shouldn’t have-…I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up. You left for a reason. I was an idiot for thinking you’d have missed me.’
Just as she was about to take her leave, Rhinedottir got up, chasing after her.
‘Wait, Alice—’
‘What for?’ Alice huffed, voice cracking ever so slightly. If she turned to face her right now, Rhinedottir didn’t doubt she’d see tears rolling down her cheeks. ‘You’ve made it perfectly clear that you do not wish to see me. Can’t you at least allow me to leave here with a sliver of my dignity left intact?’
‘I have missed you.’ Rhinedottir said. ‘And I am happy to see you. I just—’
Finally, Alice turned around to look at her again, proving Rhinedottir’s predictions to be true.
Not that it did anything to lessen the heartache it caused her upon seeing it.
‘You just what?’ Alice hissed.
‘You know I’ve never been good at this whole…talking thing.’ Rhinedottir murmured. ‘Especially not about feelings.’
‘That’s not an excuse, Rhine.’ Alice argued. ‘You can’t just go around breaking my heart like that because you lack basic communication skills. It’s not fair.’
‘For the record…’ Rhinedottir spoke, crossing her arms. ‘You broke mine first.’
At that, Alice stared at her for a good few seconds in pure disbelief.
‘You’re still bitter about it.’ she stated.
It wasn’t a question.
‘Does it matter?’
‘It matters to me.’
‘Fine, okay, yes I’m still bitter about it.’ Rhinedottir snapped. ‘The curse doesn’t exactly make things easier by amplifying negative emotions. Guess that means I hold on to petty grudges too.’
Alice’s gaze softened ever so slightly, and as much as Rhinedottir liked the wide array of emotions the other was capable of displaying, that look of pity made her feel so goddamn pathetic.
‘Are you…?’ Alice tried. ‘I mean, have you been doing…?’
‘Aside from the fact my body feels like it’s going to fall apart at any given moment, I’m fine.’
‘I’m sorry.’ Alice whispered, tugging on Rhinedottir’s heartstrings a little too much.
‘You have nothing to apologize for.’ Rhinedottir sighed. She knew that if she didn’t stop being so hateful now, she’d lose Alice forever. That alone would hurt more than any curse that could possibly be cast on her. ‘The curse is not an excuse, and you didn’t deserve any of that. I’m sorry.’
A small smile played around the other’s lips, which made Rhinedottir’s heart ache worse than ever before.
‘Apology accepted.’
‘You-…?’ Rhinedottir spluttered. ‘You shouldn’t accept an apology so easily! People will end up trampling all over you.’
‘I know you wouldn’t, though.’ Alice hummed, finally regaining a bit of her usual cheer. ‘And given the fact you’re usually too proud to admit you’re wrong about anything…I consider myself at least a little special for getting an apology from you.’
‘You’re too trusting for your own good.’ Rhinedottir huffed, though it didn’t sound as bitter as before by far.
‘So you’re saying I should demand more from you then?’ Alice teased.
Rhinedottir sighed, already having a vague hunch of where this was going.
‘Yeah, I guess that’s what I’m saying.’
As if on cue, Alice held out her arms, grinning at her mischievously.
‘Two whole minutes of hugging without complaints.’ she said. ‘That’s my condition.’
‘Two whole mi—?!’
‘Do you want to be forgiven or not?’ Alice whined, face once again contorting into a pout.
Still, Rhinedottir supposed it was better than the tears she’d shed only a moment ago.
One little hug wouldn’t kill her…probably.
‘Fine.’
Not a second after giving consent, Alice was pulling her into the tightest, warmest, most affectionate hug as humanly possible.
Rhinedottir refused to admit it felt kind of nice, instead opting to show said appreciation by wrapping her own arms around Alice as well to return the embrace.
‘I’ve missed you.’ Alice whispered into her shoulder. ‘I’ve missed you so much.’
‘…I’ve missed you too.’ Rhinedottir murmured, holding on to the other just the slightest bit tighter.
They remained like that for what felt like hours, the two-minute mark long forgotten, and yet she didn’t feel the need to complain.
‘I-…he’s gone, Rhine.’ Alice finally spoke up again. ‘He’s gone now, so you don’t-…you don’t have to worry about him anymore.’
At that, Rhinedottir tensed, hands clutching at the fabric of Alice’s shirt as if she feared the other might disappear any moment now.
‘You mean-…?’
‘Yes.’ Alice brought out, burying her face into her shoulder further. ‘Shortly after Klee was born he just-…’
She didn’t finish her sentence.
‘By “gone”…I take it you don’t mean dead.’ Rhinedottir breathed out.
‘I don’t know.’ Alice replied, parting enough to be able to look her in the eye without having to let go entirely. ‘I don’t know if he’s—’
‘I’ll kill him.’ Rhinedottir snarled, rage seeping from her pores. ‘I’ll kill him myself, Alice.’
‘I’d rather you didn’t.’ the other spoke softly, running a gentle hand over her cheek. Rhinedottir found herself leaning into the touch involuntarily, rage evaporating into thin air. It was unfair how much a simple touch affected her.
‘Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t.’ she pleaded. ‘He hurt you, so why wouldn’t I—’
‘Because I don’t want to lose you again.’ Alice told her. ‘Because-…because if you do, the knights will lock you up and take you away from me.’
‘Bold of you to assume I’d get caught.’
‘Well, they’ve got a lot more capable people working there nowadays, so…’
Rhinedottir sighed, meeting Alice’s gaze to see whether she was being genuine or not. When she found no hesitation whatsoever, she spoke up again.
‘I’m not sure it’s a good thing that your only reasons for keeping your husband alive have nothing to do with the fact you actually want him to live.’
‘It’s for Klee’s sake too.’ Alice admitted. ‘Having a father who’s too busy adventuring to come home is a kinder fate than having no father at all.’
‘I beg to differ.’ Rhinedottir huffed. ‘It’s easier to let go of someone if you know they’re dead at least. Otherwise you’ll just…keep hoping.’
It was quiet for a moment then.
‘You should-…you should come and visit Mondstadt with me.’ Alice said. ‘Albedo misses you, you know? I’m sure he’d appreciate it.’
‘Bullshit.’ Rhinedottir huffed, slowly parting the hug and crossing her arms once more. ‘You’re a much better mother than I ever was, or will be, for that matter.’
‘That’s true.’ the other agreed. ‘But…I’m not his mother. Cruel as you may have been, he misses you still. Considers you family.’
Rhinedottir opened her mouth to say something about that, but Alice already interrupted her before she could do so.
‘And don’t you dare call that pathetic.’
She promptly closed her mouth again.
‘I just think it’d do him good.’ Alice continued. ‘And you too. Don’t tell me you haven’t been lonely, traveling all on your lonesome like this.’
‘I could say the same about you.’ Rhinedottir argued.
‘I have been lonely.’ Alice agreed. ‘You see, I used to have this grumpy alchemist with me all the time, who despite her cold demeanour has a heart of gold. I wonder what happened to her sometimes.’
Rhinedottir sucked in a deep breath, and averted her gaze.
‘Maybe if she were to join me again, I wouldn’t be so lonely anymore.’
‘You know I can’t do that.’ Rhinedottir whispered, a lump forming in her throat. ‘Not with-…’
She gestured at the cave around them. ‘Not with all of this.’
‘So I’ll help you.’ Alice insisted. ‘I’ll help you break the curse, restore you country, find your people…’
Rhinedottir let out a laugh. ‘That’ll take centuries.’
‘And I have plenty of time to spare.’ Alice said with a grin. ‘Elves live longer than humans, remember?’
‘I’m immortal, Alice.’ Rhinedottir argued. ‘Even if you have more time, you’ll still-…you’ll still have to leave me eventually.’
‘I guess that just means we’ll have to break the curse before that happens.’ Alice told her, taking a gentle hold of her hand as she did.
Rhinedottir didn’t pull away.
‘We’ll fix this, Rhine.’ Alice said. ‘I promise you.’
Despite her doubts, Rhinedottir desperately wanted to believe her. Maybe a part of her already did.
After all, Alice had never broken a promise before.