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Klee loved cold, cold hands.
She liked how they were cool and refreshing in summertime, and how they felt so brave and strong in the wintertime, always ready to take on the next big gust of snow and ice. She loved how her older brother Albedo’s hands were always cold, cold and hard, almost like some sort of rock, but her other older brother Kaeya’s hands were cool, cool and soft, comforting in their own different way. They both had cold, cold hands, and they were different types of cold, but still the same. After all, it didn’t matter which one of them was holding her hand when she was scared or cupping her face when she was happy, it was the same warm feeling.
Sometimes Klee wondered how something so cold, cold cold could feel so warm. That didn’t make any sense at all, both in her brain and in the realm of science. She would know, she asked Albedo about it to see if it were possible. He gave her a funny look in return and muttered something along the lines of “not that I know of”, gently rustling the hair on her head with his cold, cold hands and sending her out to go get some ingredients from Flora’s shop. Even when he was giving her the answer he contradicted himself! He used his cold, cold hands to make her feel all warm and fuzzy inside! Why didn’t he notice it, though?
Klee concluded that it had to be because they were his own hands. You couldn’t feel your own body that easily, after all, especially if you were someone like Albedo. She remembered Kaeya telling her once that he wasn’t human, and although she wasn’t entirely sure what that meant, she assumed it was why he could spend so much time in cold, cold Dragonspine all by himself without a jacket. It had to also be why he didn’t know why his cold, cold hands could make someone feel so warm.
Klee thought for a moment. Maybe Kaeya’s cold, cold hands would make Albedo feel warm inside. After all, she knew that they loved each other. They both loved her, too, and she always got warm whenever their cold, cold hands touched her’s. Perhaps if Albedo was exposed to it he would realize that it was happening and would be able to give Klee a real answer to why something so cold, cold cold could make someone so warm. She just had to find Kaeya and ask him to hold Albedo’s hand for a moment.
Yes, she just had to wait.
~~~
The first time Klee asked Kaeya to hold Albedo’s hand, he rustled her hair and smiled apologetically. (again, with his cold, cold hands!) He said that he would love to, but today he couldn’t, because he had to go out on a mission for the Knights. Klee was upset, but she understood. Kaeya was a busy person, after all. He had to put his work in front of Klee’s wishes sometimes, just like Albedo did, or Jean did, or even Diona. She just had to wait, once more.
~~~
Klee caught Kaeya the next day, while he was mixing his coffee in the Knights’ break room. She didn’t know why he always insisted on mixing it before drinking it, it was always super dark and super bitter. She didn’t think he ever poured anything in it to mix to begin with.
Regardless, she walked up to him and tugged on his odd cape-thing for his attention, like she normally did. He looked down at her and smiled before kneeling down to her height. “What’s up?”
“Are you free today?” She asked, hoping he would get the memo. He stared at her awkwardly for a moment, slowly shaking his head.
“Er… I’m sorry, Klee, today I’m not. There’s been a lot of treasure hoarders near the outskirts of Springvale lately. I have to go down there and make sure everybody’s okay. Why did you want to know?”
Klee pouted, and Kaeya’s eyes widened, realizing that she was definitely trying to ask him for something, “Oh, uh… Oh! Did you still want me to hold Albedo’s-"
“DON’T SAY IT OUT LOUD!” She yelled, grabbing more knights’ attention than Kaeya would’ve, “It’s a secret, but… yes, I still want that. Do you think you could…?”
He sighed, “I’m sorry, I don’t think so. The treasure hoarder thing is becoming a big problem in Mondstadt again, I’ll probably be busy for the next few days. I wish I could hold his hand, too.” He got up again, ruffling Klee’s hair, like usual. Once again, the cold, cold, coldness made her head warm, warm, warm. This only encouraged her to try harder,
“Wait! Can you try finding time? I just need you for two minutes!” She yelled out before he started to walk away, once again attracting the attention of the other knights in the room. If any of them were interested before, they immediately began to look away. They probably didn’t want to be blamed for Klee’s newest explosion.
“Well… I suppose I could maybe-”
“Kae! What are you doing?? You’re the only one that can negotiate with those people! We need you! Hurry up!” Amber’s voice called from the hallway, followed by a groan. Kaeya frowned and went for the door.
“I promise I’ll try tomorrow. Alright?”
Klee nodded, watching him go with a small frown. Like yesterday, she wasn’t mad. She couldn’t be mad. Her big brother was a hero, after all, going to talk to such scary people! There were people who needed him more than her. She could just wait until tomorrow. Kaeya was super strong, surely all the bad people would leave within a day.
~~~
The next day, she caught Kaeya just as he was leaving Headquarters.
“Kaey-”
“I’m sorry, Klee. This problem is bigger than we thought, it’ll probably take a few more days. I’ll try to help tomorrow.”
It’s okay. She can wait.
~~~
She spotted him filling out paperwork on a clipboard while walking the day after that. She wasn’t exactly sure how he could do both at the same time.
“Hey Kae-”
“Klee?” He interrupted, looking down at her. He gave her a quick apologetic smile, “I really can’t today either, Kiddo. Sorry.”
She can wait.
~~~
She found him in Jean’s office the next day, laughing with her over something she didn’t hear. Hey, that’s not fair! How come he was laughing with her when he already promised Klee that he’d help her with her experiment! It didn’t look like he was busy.
So, she walked in, as angrily and assertive as she could. She’d seen Kaeya do that before on enemies, and it always stunned them for at least a moment. It only made her brother and Jean stare at her with raised eyebrows, though. It must be a skill that comes with time.
“Is everything okay, Klee?” Jean asked, frowning suddenly, “Why are you upset?”
“I am not upset,” She clarified firmly, “Just very, very disappointed.”
She was about to continue, but Kaeya held a hand up to his mouth, trying to cover a snort. One glance at Jean told her that she was trying to do the same thing, but much more elegantly than Kaeya. Why weren’t they taking her seriously??
“I see,” Jean said, just barely keeping a laugh to herself, (Klee never laughed when she said that, what was going on?!) “And why are you disappointed, Klee?”
“Be cause ,” She emphasized the last part, as if it were obvious, “Kaeya promised me he’d hold Albedo’s hand! And now he’s here, with you, with no other work to do and HE ISN’T HELPING ME!”
Neither of the senior knights spoke for a while. Klee stared at them, as angrily as she could. She crossed her arms while she waited for a response, like Jean did to her. Eventually, the eldest knight spoke.
“I think Sir Kaeya owes you an apology.” She said definitely, raising an eyebrow at him. Kaeya hung his head in return, nodding.
“I do, don’t I? I promised I’d help you, but I was just so busy I never got around to it. I absolutely promise I’ll help you with it today, though,” He said, kneeling down to Klee’s level and holding his pinky out to her. She smiled, locking her pinky with his. You can’t break a pinky promise, everybody knew that. He had to help her this time! “I’m sorry, Kid.”
“Good,” Klee responded, trying to keep her own sense of authority, “Now, let’s go find Albedo-”
She was interrupted by a quick knock at the door, before Amber walked in. Her face was unusually stern. “Treasure hoarders. They’re back in Springvale, they have reinforcements this time. The knights already positioned there can’t take them on themselves.”
Klee felt the room get darker and greyer, in a way. All three senior knights exchanged glances with themselves before Kaeya and Jean got up. Jean reached for the sword she had mounted on the wall. Klee frowned, watching them all prepare. “Can I come?”
“Um- It’s probably for the best you don’t come, Klee,” Amber said gently, smiling at her reassuringly, “If it were in an open field, you could come, but we’re fighting in the middle of Springvale. Your bombs might hurt someone, or even somebody’s house! We don’t want that, now do we?”
“No…” Klee admitted, frowning more, “but Kaeya has to stay. He pinky promised.”
Everyone was looking at Kaeya now. He coughed awkwardly, “People need us right now, Kid. I promise I’ll help you afterwards.”
She couldn’t argue against that. People did need them more than she did. So, she crossed her arms again, squeezing her way around them and marching out of the room herself, “Fine. I don’t need you anymore.”
She couldn’t wait anymore. She’d just do it herself.
~~~
Klee loved cold, cold hands. And she wanted Albedo to love cold, cold hands too. She wanted him to know just how much cold, cold hands meant to her, even if she couldn’t get Kaeya to do it. She’d just use her own cold, cold hands to make him feel warm, and then he’d be able to tell her why.
That’s what she told herself as she made her way up the stairs of the Knights’ Headquarters, knocking on the door to the Head Alchemist’s office. She was incredibly happy that he was spending this week in Mondstadt, not up in Dragonspine; she didn’t think she could walk that far.
“Come in,” a soft voice called from inside the room. Klee complied, waving to Albedo when she opened the door. He looked up from the test tubes he was holding, smiling warmly. “Oh, Trifolium. What brings you here? Is something wrong?”
“No,” She answered, marching over to him, “I want to do an experiment with you.” She held out her arms. “Hold my hands.”
Albedo looked very confused, but nodded, and squeezed her hands tight. “Like this?”
“Mhm! Do you feel anything different?”
He thought for a moment. She stayed silent as she waited for an answer. After what felt like forever, he said with a nod, “It feels… like your hands.”
Klee blinked.
“Um… but my hands are cold, right?”
“I… wouldn’t know. I’m sure you know by now that I cannot feel temperature,” She opened her mouth to say something, but he continued, “I assume that your hands are warm, anyways, since you’re a pyro user.” She closed her mouth. Warm.
Klee loved cold, cold hands. Her brothers had cold, cold hands. They were always cold, cold cold, yet they always made her feel warm and fuzzy inside. Cold, cold hands were a symbol of love, and she wanted to know why. But Albedo couldn’t tell her. And he said that her hands were warm. And if cold, cold hands meant love…
Did that mean that warm hands meant hate?
…
Did Klee hate her brothers, and Jean, and Diona, and everyone around her?
She heard Albedo suck in air through his teeth, letting go of her hands to cup her face, “Wait, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
Klee didn’t even know she was crying until Albedo pointed it out. She opened her mouth to speak, but she felt another sob coming before she could think of anything to say. She shrugged instead, letting the elder gently wrap her in his arms. Even his arms were cold, cold, cold.
Her arms were warm. She cried more.
“It’s alright.” Even Albedo’s voice felt cold, cold cold. And it still made her feel loved. Klee wondered if her voice was warm, if her words made everyone around her feel bad. “It’s okay if your experiment didn’t work this time. There’s always next time. No scientist can get the answer they want the first time they try something.”
“That’s not true!” She managed to choke out, “It’s not true! Because there can’t be a next time!”
“Why is that?” His voice was still cool and calm. Klee didn’t think she liked that anymore. “Do you not have the right materials? I can help you collect them—“
“No you can’t!”
“Then why can’t there be a next time? Let’s figure it out together.”
“Because I don’t love you!” She felt Albedo tense and let go of her slightly as she said it, which only made her cry more. He quickly went back to holding her tightly, using one hand to run his (cold, cold) fingers through her hair. She tried to ignore it.
“I see.” He said, bluntly. She also tried to ignore that. “Why don’t you love me?”
“Because my hands are warm!” Albedo said nothing this time. He didn’t do anything, either. Klee tried her hardest to ignore this, too.
“I’m sorry…? Do you mind explaining what that means…?”
He didn’t sound mad. Klee thought that was a good thing, maybe. “Your hands are cold. And Kaeya’s hands are cold. And Diona’s hands are cold. And so are Jean’s, and Razor’s, and Barbara’s. Everyone has cold hands, but whenever they touch me they feel super warm and happy! But,” She swallowed quickly, “If your hands are cold and they make me warm, my warm hands have to make you cold. I can’t love you if I’m hurting you!”
Albedo didn’t say anything for a while, again. “I think I understand. You’ve come to correspond cool body temperatures to a feeling of safety and closeness, which in turn makes you believe that warm body temperatures convey the opposite feeling.”
Klee pretended like she understood what he said.
“That isn’t true, however.” She understood that part very clearly, perking up at the declaration.
“How?”
“My hands aren’t cold because I love you, Klee. They’re cold because I’m built a little differently than you. Think of it like this: My hands are always cold. Even if I was holding hands with someone I hated, they wouldn’t magically get hotter. They’d still be cold. How could my love for someone be measured by the temperature of my hands, then?”
He had a point, Klee had to admit. But it couldn’t be the right one!
“But, that doesn’t explain why my hands are different! Why are mine hot when everyone else’s are cold?? It’s not fair.”
Albedo seemed to hold back a chuckle, “Actually, our hands are the weird ones. Most people’s hands are warm, it’s a small majority of people who have cold hands. It’s quite interesting that you’ve managed to surround yourself with almost entirely cold-handed people.”
“Really? So why are you all different?”
“It’s quite easy to figure out when you think it through. Let’s go through everyone, shall we?” Klee nodded. “Kaeya and Diona are easy to explain. They’re cryo users, so they’re naturally colder than regular people. Jean’s a bit harder to explain, but I believe it’s also for the same reason. The body temperature of an Anemo user is reflected in the wind around them, and the wind in Mondstadt is normally cool. Therefore she is as well. Barbara’s hands can also be explained by her vision, but it’s more likely that she just doesn’t have that much body fat to keep herself completely warm.”
“Oh. What about Razor?”
“Razor lives outside, Trifolium. Outside is cold.”
“Oh. But what about the Traveller?”
“I believe he also doesn’t have enough body fat to keep his hands warm. But Paimon has warm hands, does she not? She loves everyone, you know that.”
“Yeah, she does…” Klee mumbled, nodding her head, “So, I don’t hate you?”
“You don’t, for the hand thing, at the very least. I don’t know if there might be other reasons you would hate me.”
She thought for a moment more, before burying herself into his coat. “Nope! I love you 100% besides that. Um… thanks for the help, Albedo.”
“Any time, Klee. Any time. You know I would do anything for you,” He said, laughing through his nose, “We all would do anything for you.”
~~~
Klee loved cold, cold hands. After a talk with her older brother, however, she learned that she loved warm, warm hands, too. She loved all hands, no matter if they were hot, hot, hot like her’s, or cold, cold, cold like Albedo’s. She learned that how hot or cold a hand is doesn’t measure how much it loves you, it’s what the hand does, instead. She loved when Kaeya ruffled her hair, and when Diona played rock-paper-scissors with her, but she also loved when Diluc would hold her hand while they walked. All their hands made her happy. Their love made her happy.
Klee loved hands, and she loved love. And she loved it when people loved her and she loved them back. That was all she needed to know.