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"Hey Saguru." Kaito greeted him as he brushed by.
"Hello Kaito." Saguru replied, barely looking up from his book. "Freeze." He added before Kaito could start climbing the stairs.
Kaito's expression revealed nothing more than innocent confusion, but Saguru knew better than that by now.
"What do you have with you?" He asked firmly, setting down his book.
"Nothing." Kaito replied and Saguru couldn't detect a single false note in Kaito's voice. He was good.
"Really." Saguru crossed his arms.
"That's right." Kaito confirmed.
"Because it looks like you have a cat." Saguru motioned to the ball of fluff in Kaito's arms.
Kaito's eyes flickered down to it then back to Saguru. "No I don't." He said.
Saguru willed himself to take a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Kaito, I am a detective. I know a cat when I see one."
"Right, so as you can see, there isn't one." Kaito answered easily.
"Yes there is." Saguru said, with remarkable patience.
"No there isn't."
"Yes there is."
"No there isn't."
"You are in fact, holding a cat."
"No I am not."
"Yes you are."
"No I'm not."
"You Kuroba Kaito, at three forty-two and seventeen point eight seconds in the afternoon are standing in front of me holding a cat."
"No Saguru, I'm not." Kaito replied, sounding incredibly earnest.
The ball of fluff meowed.
"Then what was that?" Saguru folded his arms.
"My...stomach. I didn't eat lunch." Kaito moved closer to the stairs.
"It was the cat."
"What cat?"
"The one you are currently holding."
"I'm not holding a cat!"
"Yes you are."
"No I'm not."
"Yes. You are."
"No. I'm not."
"Then, Kaito." Saguru pressed his lips together. "If you're not holding a cat, what exactly are you holding?"
"A..." Kaito trailed off, looking down again at the bundle in his arms before back at Saguru. "A not-cat." He stated triumphantly.
Saguru's eye twitched. "A not-cat." He repeated, deadpan.
"That's right!" Kaito answered cheerfully.
"Kaito." Saguru forced the words out of himself, voice sounding oddly strangled. "If you want to keep the cat, we can. Just admit you're holding the cat."
"We can?" Kaito's eyes narrowed in suspicion and he scrutinized Saguru carefully.
"Yes." Saguru put emphasis on the word, feeling his eye twitch again.
"Ok." Kaito sighed, holding up the cat for Saguru to see. "Your detective skills somehow managed to see through my flawless cover. I have a cat. I'm naming her Ace."
"Good for you." Saguru groaned, too tired to fight Kaito's remark about his 'flawless cover'. "I'll make an appointment with the vet."
In Kaito's arms, Ace tensed up and hissed.
"Don't even start with me." Saguru hissed back at her, pulling out his phone. Ace's eyes widened and she looked up at Kaito, giving a pitiful meow.
"Saguru! Don't be mean!" Kaito gasped, looking at Saguru in shock, pulling Ace closer to him in a protective gesture.
Saguru paused, staring at them. Oh no. This wasn't just any cat. This was a cat that not only encouraged Kaito's mischief but gave him new ideas.
"Shouldn't you be figuring out where she's staying?" Saguru rubbed his forehead.
"Good idea. Come on Ace, let's get you away from the scary detective ~" Kaito cooed, walking up the stairs with her. Saguru shook his head, dialing the vet's number.
-
Three days later, Kaito came into the room as Saguru was eating a chocolate bar.
"Where did you get that?" Kaito asked, eyes narrowing.
"Get what?" Saguru replied, taking another bite.
"The chocolate bar."
"What chocolate bar?"
"The chocolate bar you're holding."
"I'm not holding a chocolate bar."
Kaito paused, staring at Saguru. Saguru calmly took another bite, enjoying watching the wheels in Kaito's head spin.
"Then what are you holding?" Kaito ventured at last.
Saguru carefully considered him before nodding his head. "A not-chocolate bar." He stated firmly.
Kaito's eyes widened. "Does this mean we don't have any other ones?"
"We don't have any." Saguru corrected, taking yet another bite, making this one nice and slow.
Kaito's agonized whine made Saguru hide a smug smirk. Ah, the blissful feeling of true justice.