Work Text:
"i wish you were here."
those five words had been exchanged so many times over the past few months that dan began to wonder if the phrase still had any meaning.
phil wasn't even looking at the laptop screen, instead looking over at the television against the wall of his room. dan assumed he was scanning the episodes on one of his buffy box sets, finding a filler episode to put on in the background while they called. phil was terrible at multi-tasking, but he still insisted on having something on in the background while the two of them called. dan could never hear the episode, but something about the habit was oddly endearing.
dan often had dreams nowadays of these scenarios, without the difficulty of the distance between them. he woke up with the absence of warmth between his arms, breathing shallowly in the liminal space of being alone with your thoughts.
his mind brought him right where phil was, the texture of the multicolored sheets under his gentle white shirt as it rode up over his waist. he could imagine the feeling of phil's arm under his neck, the glow of the television being the only thing keeping dan from believing his eyes were closed in the darkness. they would be doing exactly what they were doing now, phil's eyes fixed on the show rerun, while dan's eyes were focused on phil's face.
even phil wasn't paying attention to the episode. there was something so comforting in the fact that dan looked at phil like he was the only person in the world worth watching. even through the graininess of the webcam, phil could see dan's eyes focused on him.
there was a closeup shot of a character's face, and phil pondered to himself if he would be able to see himself in the reflections of dan's eyes in person. he wondered what color dan's eyes were in the lights of his room, if he would look down and see dan still looking at him in the same way he did over their calls.
it was so depressingly electrifying to be in love with someone you've never seen in person. the novelty had worn off and both of them started realizing how much they were aching every time they looked at each other those thousands of miles away.
one day they would be together, and nothing would hurt anymore.
it was just about getting to that point, whatever it took.