Work Text:
the train was mostly empty, but dan breathed like it was packed to the brim. deep inhales through the nose, shaky exhales pushing past his parted lips.
he saw his reflection in the smudged window, trying to trace his stressed features with his eyes so he could try to relax the muscles in his face that tensed without his permission. his mind was racing, and he desperately wished his body didn't mirror that anxiety.
he fiddled with his phone in his lap, flipping it over in his hands. the glass screen was cold against his knuckles.
what would phil think of him? what would it be like in person, without the distance between them?
dan didn't like improbability of the situation all of a sudden, although he had booked the tickets weeks in advance. it felt so much easier when phil texted him on a whim, when it all felt out of reach and more like a dream.
it had to be any minute now. dan could tell the train was beginning to stop, and the other passengers around him started shuffling with their bags. his breath was still ragged, and he wondered if phil was already there, waiting.
part of him wondered if phil wasn't there, and he had randomly given up on dan.
the train lurched to a complete stop, evident by dan's head slamming back against the headrest and the family behind him shuffling and murmuring to themselves. he gripped his phone, noticing that the screen was no longer as cold as it was minutes before.
heads bobbed in front of him, walking out of the sliding glass-paneled doors in warbling crowds into the equally crowded station.
what if he couldn't find him in the masses of people? what if he wasn't pretty enough, or funny enough, or interesting enough?
what if this was all for nothing, and he was wasting his time?
what if he wasn't there?
his feet shuffled down the steps outside of the door, scuffing against the rough concrete lined in yellow stripes pointing him in the direction of the exit. he forgot for a moment why he was there in the first place, simply wandering around an unfamiliar place with no goal other than being able to pace while being absorbed in his thoughts.
"dan?"
he flinched back into the present, looking around for the person that was trying to get his attention. the voice was familiar, even in the haze of his internal fear. his eyes searched the mass of blurred faces until he found the one he had traveled all this way to see.
before dan could say his name back, phil had his arms wrapped around dan's neck in an embrace.
he was warm, he was soft; he smelled good and different. it felt like there was no one else in the world around them as a woman brushed past dan's bags to leave the building. phil's arm moved to where the woman had touched dan, as if he had been hurt by the interaction. his warm palm pressed into the back of dan's upper arm and it felt correct.
the fears dan ran through over and over in his mind during the train journey fizzled away into the warmth phil's breath was creating on the side of his neck.
in the quiet, he felt phil's lips brushing against the pale skin in a chaste kiss, reminding dan that this was real. he didn't realize how tightly he had been gripping phil to him in their embrace.
he wanted to mutter an apology, but phil only responded by petting his hair, moving to lay his cheek against the crown of his head. he didn't need to say anything, as if phil was reading his mind and comforting the thoughts still stuck in dan's throat.
it felt more than just romantic. dan trusted him, and for the first time since he was a tiny child, he actually felt safe.
this was someone that genuinely liked him.
and finally, he was home, thousands of miles away.