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Kiyoomi doesn’t pride himself on being a very observant person. Truth is, he can skip things over and don’t even bat an eye at them.
It started at a very young age, as most of the things in his life did. For example, there was a girl who sat behind him in almost every class, who Kiyoomi didn’t even bother to talk to or even acknowledge her most of the time. According to Komori–a very questionable opinion to have in count–she had a huge crush on him for four years straight. Which was crazy, because she hadn’t.
If she had, Kiyoomi would have noticed. Or so he thought.
Years later he realized that maybe the way she always forgot her pen, so Kiyoomi would let her borrow one of his reluctantly, wasn’t unintentional. Perhaps the papers that kept appearing at the bottom of his backpack were more than just things Komori thrashed inside just to annoy him. Even the way she had approached him to ask him for help with her Maths homework, even if she was one of the top students in the class, seemed so obviously flirty. Yet, he hadn’t known, and it took years for him to finally catch up with what was happening.
He felt sorry for her. If he had known, he would have treated her properly instead of ignoring her, or he would have even reciprocated the interest. After all, she was a beautiful girl, and she seemed to be a clean one as well, so it wouldn’t have bothered him that much. But he took an eternity to notice that she liked him, and when he finally got it, they had parted ways.
He thought he had learned his lesson; he would be more attentive and sharp about his environment. That experience with that girl would not repeat itself, ever again. Kiyoomi bowed to read into people more and analyze the way they interact with him.
Still, he couldn’t pinpoint exactly when the fuck Atsumu started flirting with him seriously.
Back in their first year of high school, when they had met, Atsumu came across as a very loud, and obnoxious person. And he totally was. But Kiyoomi ended up growing weirdly attached to him and even considered him his best friend. It made sense, since he had Komori as his principal and only friend, that Atsumu and he would end up turning into each other’s ride or die.
The thing with him was that Atsumu was naturally a flirty person. He would flirt with anyone he met; whereas it was a lady at the grocery shop, or a member of a rival team he knows nothing of. Hell, Kiyoomi had unfortunately been there to see Atsumu one-sidedly flirting with his mom. Something that scarred him for life, and which brought him to hurry Atsumu up to his room every time he would visit, so he didn't see his mom.
He was like that. Of course, he applied that flirting to Kiyoomi as well, always throwing himself at him, or getting far more deeply into his personal space than he needed to. He always shrugged it off as his form of being; Atsumu was born like that massive pack of snarky comebacks and need for physical touch at all times.
Until the newfound information, he always assumed it was just Atsumu treating him like he would treat anybody else.
“Unrequited crushes suck,” Atsumu said one night at Kiyoomi’s house, where he had crashed into his bed after telling him about every detail of his day while he tried to study. Until he eventually gave up on trying and just turned around in his chair to face him and listen to him ramble about the boy he likes now. “I never felt this frustrated over one, not even when I had yours.” Kiyoomi froze.
“You had a crush on me?” He asked once he passed the initial shock. Atsumu looked over at him funnily, like he had forgotten what day today was and not a relationship-changing fact.
“Of course I did. Last year, remember?” Kiyoomi only blinked blankly at him, not a reasonable thought in his mind. Atsumu shot up alarmed from where he was lying to sit upright. “You didn’t know?”
“Of course I didn’t!”
“I flirted with you–”
“You flirt with everyone.”
“True.” Atsumu conceded. “But you were not like the rest! I bought you lunch the whole week of the training camp! And I complimented your spikes constantly! Fuck, I even texted you daily to check on you. How didn’t you know?”
Kiyoomi had been at a loss for words. Formulating it like that it was true. Atsumu didn’t do that kind of thing for anyone. “It could have been platonic,” he said, not wanting to admit he was in the wrong.
Atsumu looked like he was half a step from breaking into a maniacal fit of laughter. “You’re joking with me? I followed you around for a year straight before assuming you just weren’t interested and moved on!”
So yeah, he wasn’t the most watchful person on earth.
That he seemed to not realize big things like people liking him was the absolute funniest thing to ever happen to Komori and Atsumu. Ever since he had known about Atsumu liking him in his first year, his two so-called friends had teased him into oblivion for it, mocking him constantly thanks to the bubble of natural cluelessness he seemed to live in.
If he couldn’t notice gigantic things, it was simple to think that he couldn’t notice small things either.
That’s why when his second year arrived, and he met Kageyama Tobio, his change of perception rapidly startled him. Because he couldn’t, for the love of God, stop noticing things about him.
Like any other person, he saw the crucial parts of him. There was his raw talent, accompanied by the devotion and enthusiasm he put into the game. There were also his general looks; all marine blue eyes framed by silky hair and a bone structure people should envy, joined into a body that only reflected what constant practice could bring out. Kiyoomi could also see his usual way of carrying himself, turning from an awkward–yet sweet–person outside the gymnasium into a beast inside of it, or whenever volleyball was involved.
Unfortunately, the fact of meeting him, and seeing him in all aspects, only awakened a part of himself that Kiyoomi would rather send to nap again.
Now he was in constant awareness of whatever Tobio did.
Like the way he would always have a tick on his eyebrow whenever someone said anything particularly dumb, or how he only ever drank cold beverages, even when it got cold. Kiyoomi had been particularly interested when he started noticing Tobio taking care meticulously of his nails, and doing a whole routine for it. It was a thing he never expected from him, but in reality, it made perfect sense for him to care about that stuff.
When he got to know him better, it only got worse. Even if Tobio had downright insulted him for the entire training camp, Kiyoomi was constantly orbiting towards him, like a bee with a pretty flower extra-charged with pollen. Something that earned him at least three years more of constant teasing by Atsumu, who couldn’t shut up for a second about how down he was.
And maybe he was; because since the last day of camp, there hadn’t been a day when they wouldn’t text each other. He didn’t mean it to happen; it just did. He soon texted him first thing in the morning and then when he was about to sleep too, updating him vaguely about things in his life, as the other did the same. Sometimes it was just pictures of their pets; Tobio’s hedgehog probably took up half of his camera roll, just as he was sure his cat took over Tobio’s.
It was nice to have that kind of relationship with someone. To have a friend who understood him so much and with whom he could share things without being afraid of getting mocked; it was one of the most positive things that his second year had presented to him.
The downside was that not even half a year after getting to know each other; he had already memorized every single detail about him.
Like how his voice gets inevitably happier whenever he talks about volleyball, or how it grows fonder when he talks to him about his team. There was also the fact that he would stop to pet stray cats or dogs as they took a walk whenever Kiyoomi went to visit him or vice versa. The most endearing thing he got to know was that Tobio couldn’t fake a smile even for his own good; he was far too earnest to get it right. But when you get a genuine smile out of him, it’s probably going to burn into your mind for life thanks to the unholy amount of happiness it could give you.
When Kiyoomi began using words such as ‘endearing’ to describe anything related to him was when he knew he was gone.
It was unavoidable. It was like he was meant to fall for him, anyway. And he didn’t regret it, even if he pines hopelessly after him until a point where it gets embarrassing; he doesn’t regret it even for a second.
Ever since they met, there had been a year full of unhappy events for them; Karasuno’s loss in Tobio’s first year, then them not making it to nationals this year, Kiyoomi having to graduate soon, among others. There was also a lot they gained thanks to each other; there were countless rides on trains so they could meet up at each other’s houses; countless face-time calls, so Kiyoomi could see what tricks Tobio had taught his hedgehog, and a million texts in a chat that was never quiet.
It had been a life-changing thing to fall in love; to be in so much awareness of things around him for the first time in his life, and that being a good thing instead of a bad one. He didn’t know what he would do if he didn’t notice it all, if he didn’t get to appreciate Tobio as a whole.
That’s what brought him to his new discovery; Tobio needed to jump into the fallen leaves anytime he saw a bunch of them together.
It was a common thing. But Tobio always seemed extremely pleased to smash them whenever he came across them, no matter where they were, or if he was mid-talk; he would stop just to crush them beneath his shoes and squirm like he was a little kid with a new toy. Not that Kiyoomi would complain. He found it completely mesmerizing every time he saw it.
However, he still thought there must be a reason to why he liked it so much; one wouldn’t flood with joy like that, a tiny smile and all if there weren’t a reason. He never asked him about it because Tobio would just resume talking as if nothing had happened. Until his opportunity finally came.
It was a casual, rainy, and windy day in autumn. The rain wasn't as dense as to be called a storm, but it was close to being one, and it was still a present factor of the evening alongside the common wind that would shake the trees up in this season. His neighborhood streets were empty, except for the two of them walking under Kiyoomi’s black umbrella at a slow pace, not really minding the cold and the weather they were currently under.
They had made a habit out of walking together whenever they went to visit each other, which was frequently because apparently, Tobio liked his company just as much as Kiyoomi enjoyed his. So Tobio had come over to his house the day before, with the excuse of wanting Kiyoomi’s help with his English homework, when in reality they knew they would end up watching Law & Order together all night.
Kiyoomi was holding the umbrella over them, spinning it whenever the wind changed its path to protect them from it. The rain had gotten stronger since they left his house, something they didn’t quite count on because now they were on the verge of soaking themselves wet just to continue their tradition.
Tobio was gesticulating dramatically a history of how Hinata did something absurd again in their practice, with sound effects included and an offended scowl plastered on his features. If he found it cute, it was no one’s business but his own.
“And then he hit me with the volleyball on the head again. Can you believe it?” Tobio finished narrating, looking up at him, very insulted. Kiyoomi stared back, distracted because he was nearly pouting, and fuck, he wasn’t god’s strongest soldier. In fact, he was his weakest. Actually, he shouldn’t even be a soldier. “Are you listening to me?”
Kiyoomi snapped out of his momentarily shut down. “Um, not really, sorry.”
“Are you okay?” Tobio asked him, light worry taking over his features in an open way, just his honest concern. Atsumu was right about bullying him about this stupid crush. It was getting ridiculous. “You’ve been weird lately.”
Was he?
“I’m fine. I just have a lot on my mind right now, with graduation and stuff.”
Tobio nodded sympathetically as they passed over a park near his house. “Yeah, right, because you’re graduating soon.” He sounded less enthusiastic than he did a moment earlier, duller and somber.
Kiyoomi wanted to ask him about that change in tone when Tobio suddenly gasped, the glowing spark returning to his impossibly blue eyes just as his mouth formed that same grin he reserved for his time on the volleyball court. And then Kiyoomi was the only one standing under the umbrella.
It took a few seconds for him to catch up with the fact that Tobio had just started running ahead, making the water that was covering the sidewalk splash in all directions with every step. Kiyoomi breathed in deeply before sprinting after him, with the umbrella still covering him, cursing the day he befriended him.
“What the fuck are you doing, idiot?” He asked as he followed him, trying to get him under the umbrella again, although it would be useless considering he was almost soaked, even if he was only out in the rain for a minute. “You’re going to catch a cold! I’m not taking care of you if you get sick!”
Tobio then stopped in his tracks, letting Kiyoomi catch up with him. He thought the threat of not being a caretaker for him had made him re-think, but it all made sense once he stepped beside him and saw what the whole deal was about. Leaves. A lot of them.
“Did you seriously get yourself all wet because of this?” Kiyoomi asked, but Tobio was already too busy stepping on the mountains of leaves to care.
The crushing sound of the brownish-red vegetation would have been satisfying enough if the view he was getting from afar wasn’t even more beautiful than that. He wasn’t sure if his heart could resist Tobio jumping into the piles and piles of leaves, while smiling openly and at sky-high; but he guessed that he would have to find out now if his heart could take it. If it gives out, well… At least he died as a blessed man.
For a person usually well-collected and serious, the image of being so cheerful about this kind of thing wasn’t something that suited Tobio, but in a certain way, it did. Of course, he would turn into ‘happy puppy’ mode over the autumn leaves. Of course he did. Life just keeps making him even more perfect in his eyes every time he blinks.
“Is there a reason to why you enjoy stepping on these things so much?” Kiyoomi spoke above the sound of the rain, which just kept getting louder as the minutes passed. That's why they get for not seeing the dark clouds looming over the city.
Tobio stared at him from where he was standing above an already crushed stack of colorful victims. “I can’t tell you.”
Kiyoomi frowned under his umbrella. Ever since they became friends, there wasn’t a thing that they could talk about with each other. Except for Kiyoomi being madly, deeply in love, but that was a particular case. “Why not?”
“You’ll laugh at me.” Tobio stared up at him through the bangs that were now sticking to his forehead, fully drenching. All of himself, really. “Hinata laughed at me when I told him.”
“Well, as you can see, I’m not Hinata.”
“Promise me you won’t laugh, though.”
“I promise. Now tell me why you’re going to risk catching a cold like that.”
Tobio stared at him for a while, not caring about the pouring rain hitting against him, before he began telling. “When I was little, I liked to walk in autumn to step on the leaves. But when I saw there were a bunch, I was truly happy, because…”
Kiyoomi expected him to continue, but even if there was a large curtain of water covering his view, he could still see the other flush furiously in a way he only had seen limited times before. “It can’t be that bad.”
Tobio glared at him. “I always felt like a monster to the leaves.” Kiyoomi had to repeat the sentence in his mind just to check if he had actually said that. No way this was one of the most terrifying players he has met in his life. “As a child, I was very… Imaginative. I always thought that I was like Godzilla to them. Like, they’re living in their own neighborhoods of leaves and I am a tall giant who can just break their cities and all that.”
And fuck him if that wasn’t the cutest shit he had ever heard.
“It’s stupid,” Tobio said rapidly, not aware of the fondness that was slowly taking over Kiyoomi. “It just stuck with me as a child, and I never got over it.”
He stepped on them because he felt like Godzilla. To dead leaves. He felt like he was Godzilla to imaginary cities of dead leaves.
“You’re going to laugh, aren’t you?” Tobio asked in resignation, as he looked down and stepped on a leaf that he had forgotten to crush.
“I’m not going to laugh,” he reassured him. And with a very decisive motivation, he said; “I’m going to kiss you now.”
“What?”
It was too late now. He let go of his umbrella, throwing it aside to get swiftly out by the wind, getting himself into the pouring and bitter rain. Kiyoomi did not care about the fact that he could get a cold and go through that awful experience. He didn’t care about getting his clothes soaked, or about his neighbors seeing him like this.
Kiyoomi only ever cared about the fact that the boy that he loved was standing in front of him, smiling as he smashed autumn leaves just because of something he invented when he was a kid. If they were to be honest, it wasn’t the first time he thought of kissing Tobio, and it wouldn’t be the last either. He just got a rush of confidence fueled by the extreme flutters his heart and soul were suffering.
By the time he reached him, on top of a pile of leaves, looking at him in expectancy, Kiyoomi was already fully wet. By the time he cupped his cheeks and pulled him towards him, he was entirely soaked.
He didn’t know what he expected from the other–actually he didn’t think at all–but it surely wasn’t to be kissed back the moment their lips touched, with one of his hands coming up to rest on his elbow to support himself. Kiyoomi felt kind of weak to the knees to feel him respond so keenly and sweetly.
It was wet, and it was clumsy, and it was fierce; but it was theirs. And that made all the difference in the world.
Because it was theirs, it was that he could taste how this was not something only he had been wanting to do; he felt it in the way the other leaned against him further, tilting his chin up and pressing his lips tenderly but assuredly against his.
The rain was booming through his ears, and his clothes felt awful being stuck to him, but Kiyoomi just felt happy. He couldn’t help it. The giddiness came by alone, filling every part of himself and leaving him feeling light on the head.
Tobio pulled away slightly to take a breath, letting Kiyoomi rest his forehead against his, rubbing his thumb against the other’s cheek, caressing it lovingly. “Didn’t take you for one to make dramatic gestures,” he said breathlessly.
Kiyoomi chuckled, the sound drowned out by the downpour. “Me neither. But it felt right.”
“It did?” Tobio pulled away to stare at him, searching in his eyes for something. Kiyoomi felt outraged that he even had to ask.
“Of course it did! You were standing there looking all cute and hopping on leaves. How could I not want to kiss you?”
He saw the other gulp down. “So, you would kiss me in any other situation that wasn’t this one?”
“In every single one of them.”
Tobio seemed to be content with that response, a tiny grin making his way up to his lips as he tilted his head to the side. “Can we kiss again, then?”
“Yes, but somewhere else. I don’t know if I feel comfortable kissing above all the leaf cities you have destroyed today. It would be rude of us.”
“I hate you,” Tobio said, but the smile and the affectionate tone of the words didn’t help his case.
Well, if he was going to catch a cold just to see Tobio smile at him like that, it was worth it. It was definitely worth it.