Chapter Text
Though the sunshine still shines through the bars of my window as does the moonlight, it feels like the world has stopped, but only for me.
The pause seemed so small at first, but slowly it has developed into a deep state that I can not escape from. It’s been so simple, yet so hard. The more I try to swim to the surface of these vast waters, the more rain pours into the ocean I dived headfirst into, but now try to escape from.
I was a coward in my mind, but now I feel as though it is bleeding over into the physical world. It goes in the way I despise the way I hurt myself just to feel something, but Agni, I don’t have the spirit to stop. I’ve driven myself to the point of insanity, I feel like I am teetering on the edge, whether it’s worth it to drive back into the storm I do not know.
In reality, I lay in a prison cell I will probably never escape from, pondering. Closing my eyes, I rest
Dreaming of a better life, everything's the way it should be. He's with me once again, and I couldn't be happier.
Here in this dreamland, I'm the greatest. Another Agni Kai? Not a problem. The battlefields smell of burnt grass, it almost takes me back to my first duel.
I and the challenger walk toward each other, turning our backs to each other; one, two, three long strides, and we quickly turn back toward the other
They're a shell of the form I saw them in just mere seconds before; all their skin seems to have been ripped off, with just small pieces remaining. Blood is pouring out of their deformed body. Their eyes have this… glow to them, almost like the sun, I thought I’d go blind looking into them. Bones crack and splitter into shards, forming an arrow facing downward above their skull. All combined, it’s a horrifying sight.
The ground starts to crack around me, and the challenger's blood falls between the gaps. I look down between one of the crevices and somehow, there are vast waters below the land. I sit on that end, my head hurts, I lean forward and fall into the ocean.
The water is rough and cold, so cold. The waves push and pull me, and through the haze, I get it.
The Avatar, he’s with me. Deep down, I know it, whether now that I recognize that this is a vision or not make a difference, I don’t know.
So much to ponder, so little time.
Time?
Time. My dreams were someone else's all my life, not an original thought has come through my mind. Where does the time go? I’ve so much but too little. More, more, more… times up, wake up. NO!
I refuse to live the rest of my life waiting for a miracle. I wasted enough of my life already, I can not wait anymore.
I awaken
Slowly, day after day, I find myself worthy once again to hold that power once again. For a time I had pondered whether or not I was truly worthy to hold that energy in the first place, but I now know; I always was.
I could always feel a sort of flame within me. Even after my bending was taken from me, I knew- I thought, it would return eventually. After so many years now of that spark dying in me, I have become less.. driven.
Over this time, slowly, I've felt small… sparks almost of something. The feeling is addicting, unlike any drug I've had. Days go by, and I'm starving for more
Today it happens again, and this time is different.
I can feel it throughout my body, spreading fast
I need it, closing my eyes and reaching out to any force that will grant me that full power, I feel something–a small spark–even though it's so small, to me, it's the biggest feeling like that I've felt in years.
It’s exhilarating, even though I can’t control it, I crave more of it.
The sunrises once more, and I am born again