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Part 2 of Loki Gets What He Wants (And Everyone Else Does Too)
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Published:
2015-05-16
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2016-02-28
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8/?
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LGWHW 'Verse Drabbles

Summary:

These drabbles are in no particular order. They will take place at any point in the ‘verse. Primarily, they will expand upon events/ideas mentioned in the LGWHW fic. I will be writing multiple sequel fics and a prequel or two, so future drabbles may take place during those stories’ timelines as well or beyond. I will always tell you when and in what context the smaller story fits into the ‘verse at large. Feel free to make requests or suggestions!

 

Generic Placebo Disclaimer: I own nothing

Notes:

Thank you everyone who has stayed with me! Thank you everyone reading this! Thank you Oudemia for putting up with me ;) Thank you thank you thank you!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Heart

Summary:

This takes place directly after chapter seven of LGWHW. Movie night is over, Thor has sent kitten!Tony off to make up with Loki, and he remembers a bit of important information Tony shared in his long, rambling rant: Steve is sad.

Chapter Text

Thor is not stupid.  

 

Many a soul has claimed him to be; many an insult to his intelligence has been thrown his way; many a insidious, thinly veiled remark has been given to him with a smile, but Thor is no fool.

 

There are myriad intelligences in the universe and all its realms and every soul possess a number of them; this Thor knows. Some may excel with numbers and logic; some can weave extraordinary tales that bring new worlds and beings to life; there are persons who wield power, like his brother’s seiðr or the mortal mutations; other individuals have a keen intuition, so honed others call it luck for fear of examining it further. Thor knows there are many ways in which to be smart, and he knows everyone is.

 

Thor’s intelligence is subtle and easy to overlook. He fumbles with many skills others take for granted and the many commonly recognized intelligences others acknowledge, so it is only those who truly know him that are able to see what a genius he is.

 

Thor’s intelligence, his true strength, lies in the people themselves, the same people who claim he has none. He may not understand his brother’s magic, Man of Iron’s numbers, or even Steven’s keen strategic mind, though excel he does in the ways of battle, but he understands them. He understands Loki’s pain, no matter how he tries to disguise it with anger; he understands Anthony’s insecurity underneath his projected confidence; and he understands in their leader and friend the feeling of being lost and powerless while seemingly being anything but.

 

He knows the words and delivery necessary to make Loki drop his facades. He knows when to subtly reassure Anthony by words, action, or influence of another. And he knows that when Steven withdraws to his room, the last thing he really needs is to be alone.

 

So, as he left a furry Anthony with the ‘best of luck’ shouted through closing doors, Thor knew where he was needed next.

 

“To the captain’s floor, JARVIS.”

 

*****

 

Steve sighed, sitting on his couch and staring at the television’s blank screen. He’d had a lot of fun that day, for all that the call to assemble rang out at ass o’clock in the morning. With that and the kitten sneaking aboard the Quinjet, the day could have been terrible. Luckily, the being they had been called out to potentially fight had been peaceful and the kitten had remained safe, much as the furry bastard had tried his best not to. The mission had turned out to be an enjoyable outing with most of his team and he would remember it fondly. When they finally returned home, he was able to spend some time sketching the events of the day without any intrusive thoughts soiling the activity. Soon, JARVIS had issued the call for movie night, and Steve packed up his pencils and notepads, neatly tearing out a single page with a smile before boarding the elevator.

 

When he disembarked on the common floor, he had headed straight for the kitchen. He called out a greeting to Natasha, who was starting the large, movie theatre grade popcorn machine, as he reached the (large, restaurant grade) refrigerator. There, he removed one of the many random magnets (coincidently, a Garfield hugging Pooky one) and added his new drawing to the door: a comical full-color sketch of a tiny black kitten with a cape leaping towards a pouting Hulk, assembled Avengers reaching out behind him.

 

They (read: He. Thanks, Nat) delivered snacks to the gang and the lot of them watched JARVIS’s movie choice for the night. When the film ended and his friends began to go their separate ways, Steve found himself wishing they would stay, that they would watch another video, play a game, or just chat. It had been such a good day, and he did not want it to end. He feared what would likely come, should he retire for the night and close his eyes. But, he forced himself to rise, smile, and retreat to his floor like the others. As the elevator doors closed, he wished the kitten sitting so comfortably on Thor’s lap was instead digging its evil little claws into his shoulder to ride the lift down with him to his floor, stalk him through his nightly rituals, and curl up with him to sleep.

 

Steve futilely attempted to swallow down the ball of anxiety that was steadily creeping up his chest and let the doors close, making the journey to his floor without the usual banter with JARVIS.

 

Now, he sat on his couch, staring at a blank television screen, not wanting the good day to end, yet fearing it already had. Steve sighed. And then he heard a knock at the door. With curiosity and a bit of hope, he rose and opened it.

 

“Steven, my friend!” a booming Thor greeted him with a wide smile, “I find myself most wakeful this evening. I wonder if you should like to ‘hang out,’ as they say.”

 

Steve smiled with relief and invited him in.

 

*****

 

Thor is not stupid.

 

When it comes to people, he is as intelligent as they come. When Loki hides his hurt behind a mask, he knows how to bring it down. When the Man of Iron feigns indifference or pretends confidence he does not feel, he knows the words to say to reassure his comrade of his worth. So when Steven Rogers, leader and friend, hides his fear, loss, and heartache behind closed lips and closed doors, Thor knows to come a’knocking.

 

And when the man lightly presses his leg against his own, eyes determinedly gazing at the television screen before them, Thor knows to throw his arm around him and bring him closer.

 

When Steven starts to snore, he knows to settle back into the couch and lower the volume of the Tv.

 

When Steven wakes up gasping, he knows how to draw the words from him and bleed some of the poison from the wound.

 

And when, a couple hours of talk later, Steven thanks him and says he really doesn’t have to stay, hand clenching the bottom of Thor’s shirt, he knows it for the plea that it is and simply smiles. Pressing a kiss to the other’s temple, Thor queues up the next episode, leaving the volume low. He leans back, pulling Steven with him, until the other man lies against his chest. He waits patiently for the body atop his to relax, breath slowing into the rhythm of slumber.

 

When his friends are in pain, Thor knows how to help.

 

Because Thor is intelligent.

 

And his true strength is not his brain nor his brawn, but his heart.

 

 

Chapter 2: Old Fashioned Values

Summary:

Expanding upon this excerpt from LGWHW ch3:

Even though his primary job was now the liaison to the Avengers, Phil still oversaw many missions and agents when he wasn’t helping the team battle mutant butterflies or overseeing their retrieval of super powered convicts or trying to get a handle on the media when one pissed off some big name (it was surprisingly Steve who gave him the biggest headache on this front).

Notes:

Thank you for such wonderful feedback on the last drabble! I was worried no one would want to read these things besides me. I am so glad I was wrong! So, here's another! Hope you enjoy!!

Thank you everyone! :D
Thank you the ever-patient Oudemia! ;)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Phil loved Captain America. For all his life, he looked up to the hero and wanted to be just like him. He idolized the man, worshiped him, collected every bit of information and memorabilia he could. And when, as an adult, following in Captain America’s footsteps and trying his best to make the world a safer place, Phil Coulson always asked himself, ‘What would Cap do?’ and carried out the answer. Because Phillip J. Coulson loved Captain America.

 

He did.

 

 

It was just really hard to remember right now.

 

Phil sighed, drug his fingers through his hair, and loosened his tie. Throwing away his dry pen and selecting a fresh one, he resumed his work halfway down the fortieth page of paperwork. He was almost done….With this document. With a forlorn look at his empty of coffee mug (the fifth? sixth?), he began the next stack.

 

Phil Coulson loved Captain America.

 

But sometimes, he hated Steve Rogers.

 

He laughed to himself at the thought, thinking: The right wing hated him more. Today (Yesterday? Was it A.M. yet? He’d have to look at a clock), the more conservative politicians in the country had learned a valuable lesson after hounding Steve for weeks to support their campaigns; Turns out ‘old-fashioned values’ means, as the Captain so eloquently put it (and on camera, no less), ‘Treat people with fucking respect and mind your own business, Senator.’

 

Phil had to admit he agreed. But, the last however many hours fielding paperwork and angry and/or annoying phone calls from Nick, various officials, the media, and the Avenger’s public relations and publicity teams, Phil found himself hating his idol just a little bit.

 

He was proud of him, for sure. And he still loved Captain America. He just hated all the work that came along with Captain America being Steve Rogers. Maybe he should just find a new job.

 

Seriously contemplating retirement (and not for the first time), Phil was jolted out of his musings as a brief knock came at his door before it swung open. With a sheepish grin and a fresh mug of coffee as his shield, Steve entered the office. Phil accepted the peace offering and moved a stack of papers to a clear part of his desk where one could actually see the wood (well, before he set the papers down). Placing a pen down upon it, perhaps a bit more forcefully than necessary, Phil smiled pleasantly up at the Captain.

 

Steve shivered at the terrifying smile, sat down, and picked up the pen meekly. He struggled through the complex paperwork without complaint, the two working in near silence through the night.

 

Some time around dawn (and an unknown number of empty coffee mugs later), Phil found himself smiling. Maybe he’d wait a few more years to retire.

 

*****

 

A month later, Steve knocks at Phil’s office door, coffee mug in hand and thermos in elbow. When he walks in, Phil is on the phone arguing with a very vocal someone. He sets down his burden, takes a seat, and grabs a pen.

 

The paperwork is old hand now, he has his own cup of writing utensils, and the chair cushion he’s sitting upon has a perfect mold of his rear end; The world is learning that Captain America is Steve Rogers.

 

It’s a valuable lesson.

 

Too bad it comes with so much paperwork.

 

 

 

Notes:

Please let me know what you think!
Hmm...What to write next? :D

Chapter 3: Happy Hogan: Chat Chauffeur

Summary:

This drabble occurs after LGWHW, during the next time Tony is turned into a kitten after ticking Loki off. Tony is craving fish and he has a master plan to get it.

Notes:

Thank you for all the wonderful feedback on the last drabble, wow! Here's another, hope you all enjoy it :)

Special thanks to Oudemia for all the non fic support :)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Happy looked at his phone for the eighth time in near so many minutes. Shaking his head and putting it back into his pocket, he sighed. Waiting on Tony Stark wasn’t anything new; it was practically his job description. He shifted his weight and leaned on the car door he had held open for the past ten minutes. Tony had said in his text message to meet him in the garage pronto, that they were going on mission. That was twenty minutes ago.

 

Just as Happy was about to check his phone again (and perhaps shoot off an exasperated text to his eccentric employer and friend), the elevator dinged. Finally. He straightened up and watched as the doors opened, waiting to greet the genius with a sarcastic jab at his highness's tardiness only to stare in confusion at the empty lift before him. Or...not quite empty? Baffled, Happy Hogan just watched as a small black kitten, inexplicably carrying a phone in its mouth, exited the elevator and strode towards him.

 

A fourth of the way across the twenty foot distance, the creature lost its grip on the cell phone and the device clattered to the floor. With an annoyed flick of the tail, the cat tried to pick it up. And tried. And tried again. After many attempts, the kitten succeeded and, tail high and proud, resumed its journey. Only a few feet were traversed, however, before the phone fell to the floor yet again; The object was simply too large for the tiny animal’s mouth. The kitten picked it back up, after many failed attempts, and carried it forth. Just as Happy, still staring in confusion, mouth possibly agape, thought vaguely that the cat was going to make it to him without any further hindrance, the cell phone once more slipped from its mouth and to the floor. Huffing - and was that a tiny growl? - the kitten gave up and simply pushed the device with its nose the rest of the way to Happy’s feet.

 

After confirming it had reached its destination, the kitten opened its mouth as wide as possible, lowered it down over the phone like a toy claw machine, and chomped down. Before it could lose its prize, the cat quickly jumped into the car and up onto the leather seat. Finally, and with visible relief, the cat voluntarily let the phone fall to its feet.

 

The kitten turned and looked up at Happy. Happy stared back at the kitten.

 

“MRAOW” said the kitten.

 

“...” said the chauffeur.

 

The kitten slumped in defeat and resignation. Flipping the phone over with its right front paw, the cat began to, of all things, type.

 

Happy stared.

 

Minutes passed with much clicking, growling, and even a hiss or two as the kitten struggled to scribe its message.

 

Happy’s phone dinged in his pocket. He blinked and withdrew the device, seeing he had a message from his boss. Staring down at the screen, he blinked some more.

 

Tp rthse sushji plaxce, haspy

 

Years of interpreting Tony Stark’s drunk texts did not fail him now. He looked at the kitten before him, sitting up straight and looking oh so smug. With an inner shrug and an outward roll of his eyes, Happy shut the door and rounded the vehicle. He climbed into the driver’s seat, fastened his seatbelt, and pulled out of the garage. To the sushi place it was.

 

*****

 

The host at the door did not so much as blink when Happy Hogan entered the restaurant, held the door open for a ruffled kitten (‘I told ya you should have ridden in my lap, boss’), and asked for Tony Stark’s reserved table. When the kitten seated himself on the table and began bathing himself as Happy ordered their regular, the waiter neither questioned nor hinted at any peculiarity. And when the head chef herself delivered their meal, she only glanced at the kitten before offering to bring a bowl of milk as well.

 

Tony purred in thanks.

 

Happy wondered how this was his life.

 

He looked over at his boss, the kitten enthusiastically scarfing down fish, and shrugged. Picking up his chopsticks, he dug in.

 

 

 

Notes:

Happy! :D lol It was so hard to stick to just the Avengers in the last fic, I'm so excited to explore Avenger-adjacent characters! :D What did you think? Did you enjoy the long-suffering Happy Hogan's adventure with kitten!Tony? Any thoughts on what I should write about next? Let me know! Love you guys!! :)

PS I am super proud of the name on this one, guys, just saying :D

Chapter 4: Pepper Gets What She Wants

Summary:

This drabble takes place soon after LGWHW. Pepper hears about the events that transpired and reacts.

 

Generic placebo disclaimer: I own nothing.

Notes:

This one is for notoneforreality for reasons I will state at the end because I don't want to give anything away :P

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“Loki Something Laufeyson!”

 

Loki flinched, turning towards the clip-clip of heels marching intimidatingly his way, a wary look on his face.

 

“What is this I hear about you turning Tony into a fluffy little kitten?”

 

“Um…” the god ventured tentatively.

 

“I meet for my weekly lunch with Steve today only to hear about all of the Avengers getting cuddly time with a tiny and furry little Tony, while I’m taking care of all the meetings he missed and running his business and being a responsible adult.”

 

Loki cowered back into the cushions of the couch a little at the woman’s glare, “Sorry?”

 

“And no one even thought to call me? Why don’t I get kitten Tony cuddles?”

 

“Uh…”

 

“So here is how it is, Laufeyson. I have to sit through a very long and very boring meeting in twenty minutes. If I have to sit through it, then Tony should have to, too. And I want kitty Tony cuddles. As his third oldest friend, I deserve them. Also, it should be harder for him to escape if he can fit in my hands and I can pet him into submission.” Pepper demanded, finally allowing the smile she had been holding back to appear on her face.

 

Realizing he was not in trouble with, frankly, one of the only three beings in all the realms that truly frightened him (for the record, the other two were Natasha and his mother) and catching on to the woman’s mischievous plan, Loki allowed a grin to form upon his own face.

 

“What a wonderfully wicked plot, Ms. Potts.”

 

“Thank you, Mr. Laufeyson,” she replied.

 

“It is done. Have a wonderful meeting, Pepper.”

 

“Oh, I plan to,” she replied.

 

The two exchanged evil smiles, before Pepper turned on her heel and marched to the elevator.

 

“Workshop, JARVIS.”

 

“Of course, Ms. Potts.” JARVIS said in an amused tone.

 

*****

 

The wrench made a terribly loud and frightening sound as it clattered down upon the metal countertop, causing Tony’s fur to poof out and his paws to leave the seat of the stool in reaction.

 

Wait...fur? Paws?

 

The elevator dinged.

 

“Oh, To~ny,” Pepper’s voice melodically called out, “Time to go to a mee~ting!”

 

...Fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

This one is for notoneforreality who wanted one of the Avengers to ask Loki to change Tony when the latter got on their nerves. Hope you like it!

Comments make my day, people! Feel free to leave your thoughts, a smile-y face, suggestions/requests for future drabbles and fic, or whathaveyou. I really appreciate it. :)

Speaking of, I will be posting the first chapter of the first sequel later today :D

Chapter 5: Nope

Summary:

Just a tiny little drabble for you guys. Summary: Clint thinks he's so funny.

 

Generic placebo disclaimer: I own nothing.

Notes:

Thanks Oudemia :) Thanks everyone who bothers to read this little bitty addition :)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Tony, tired and a bit loopy after an all-night binge in the lab, found himself questioning his sanity as he exited the elevator unto the common floor. High pitched giggles were floating out of the kitchen. Giggles, really? The laughter was interspersed with manic speech, but try though he might, Tony could not make out the words the screeching was attempting to say. As he neared, he realized the one responsible for the cacophony was none other than their resident birdbrain. Of course. Who else would be snickering in his kitchen at five o’clock in the morning?  

 

He drew to the doorway, his face pinched at the level of noise, and his expression a clear ‘What the hell is your problem?’ An exasperated Bruce Banner, leaning against the counter, just sighed as Clint noticed the newcomer and laughed harder. Sitting on the floor in front of the idiot was a strange rounded plastic box with a red bottom and a golden top, a perfect circle cut out on one end. Arching his eyebrow at the unfamiliar contraption in his colors, Tony queried the only sane individual in the room, “What is that?”

 

Bruce sighed yet again, refusing to acknowledge the sounds of Barton now banging his head against the table in his fit. “A litter box.”


Tony blinked at the offending object twice in slow succession. He nodded to himself. “Nope,” he stated simply and left the room. He didn’t need breakfast/dinner. He would just go to bed. Why had he invited these people to live with him again? He stepped into the elevator and let the doors shut on Clint’s shrieks of laughter. He needed new friends.

 

 

 

Notes:

Wow, you read my itty bitty teeny tiny drabble? You are SO SWEET!!!! Aw, shucks. Thank you, friend!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D

Stay tuned guys. I'll be starting a new fic in this 'verse soon as well as posting more drabbles. I will have more time in a month because I will be graduating with my bachelor's!! Yay finally. I will be taking semester off before Master's so hopefully I will have time to indulge in my hobbies again :)

Hugs to everyone who is still reading this! Cheek kisses to anyone who comments ;)

Chapter 6: Aunt Peggy

Summary:

Peggy Carter always loved cats.

 

**Warning: There is Character Death in this one, fyi. Not any of the main characters, but if you feel you need to know more before you read on, please see the end notes.

Generic placebo disclaimer: I own nothing.

Notes:

Hi again guys! Hope you love this one! Let me know! Thanks to Oudemia and everyone still with me!! Love you guys!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Peggy Carter always loved cats. If Agent Carter had a single weakness, it was those furry little bastards. Just ask Angie. The two of them grew into crazy old cat ladies together.

Many of Tony’s favorite childhood memories involved visiting his aunties’ house and being smothered in kitty cuddles. As far back as he can remember, the Carter-Martinelli’s had a cat or five in their home and from his first visit as a baby, Tony was indoctrinated into the Cat Person Culture. Howard, however, would have none of it, so young Tony learned to hide his own weakness for the fluffy little critters, knowing better than to beg for his very own kitten for Christmas. Fortunately, Tony always had a haven at his aunties’ house and even in his rough old age with too many years spent down the bottle, Howard could never say no to Peggy Carter.

When Jarvis and his parents died in that awful wreck, Tony drunk himself blind in the empty mansion. The world faded into silence and came filtering back in with a rumbling weight on his chest, a warm lap under his head, and long, sure fingers carding through his hair. He turned his face into his Aunt Peggy’s stomach and cried.

For the couple weeks before Tony made his way back to campus, he stayed in the safety and comfort of his aunts’ house. The two ladies insisted he do so and made him feel at home for his stay. Of course, he’d always felt most at home there. And Charles, a fat and lazy tabby and a new addition to the Carter-Martinelli household, kept him company every night, purring into his pillow right beside his ear. Tony fell asleep nightly with his nose pressed into tubby belly and his tears drying on soft fur.

When Aunt Angie passed away at home, but ten short years later, she was surrounded by her furry children, her adopted nephew, and the love of her life. Tony and Peggy clasped each other's hands tight at the funeral, standing together long after others had gone. That night, Tony held his aunt on the living room couch, the woman not able to bear adjourning to an empty bedroom. The cats kept vigil with them, their purring the only sound.

It was but another few years when Tony found himself walking his aunt into a nursing home. He had argued and argued with numerous establishments, but no matter how he pleaded or bribed, none would allow pets. The cats numbered three, now, as old as their human mother in their own years. Tony paid for them to be taken care of by a nice older couple, friendly neighbors of his aunt. At least once every month he would bring the cats for a visit. Aunt Peggy did not always remember their names, or even his own, but she would smile bright as the sun upon seeing the ancient felines. One month came in which he brought only two cats. The next, only one. When he came back from Afghanistan, Charles, the last of his aunts’ furry children, and the dearest to Tony’s heart, had passed on.

He hired a therapy cat owner to visit the nursing home residents weekly and paid extra for extended visits in Peggy’s room. He did not visit on those days, as it hurt too much.

When Steve Rogers was recovered from the ice and began paying Peggy visits, Tony only knew that someone else had been bringing her flowers. He had heard her niece was in town, perhaps it was her.

The Avengers assembled, saved the world from Loki, and then saved the world a few more times with Loki. They became friends, a family. Eventually, each had paid a visit or two to the great Peggy Carter, but it was only Tony and Steve who went weekly. As their friendship became closer, they would often, though not always, pay their visit together. On Peggy’s bad days, they helped each other through.

The first weekly visit after Tony was gifted his new ability, was an especially bad day. Cognizant enough to recognize both men, but not enough to reason, Peggy became confused and frightened at the sight of someone from her past and another from the present. Unthinkingly, Tony transformed into a kitten and hopped onto the bed to comfort her. The distraction worked and she soon forgot about the event, cooing to the kitten in her lap. For the rest of the visit, Tony purred in her arms, accepting scritches with enthusiasm and mewing for more.

Tony and Steve continued to visit their Peggy together, Tony turning into a kitten on the bad days and staying human for the good.

*****

The bad days grew in frequency until one day JARVIS fielded a call from the nursing home.

The music in the workshop was silenced. “...Sir…”

*****

The team gathered in the living room for the news, not knowing how else to help than to just be there.

The elevator doors opened to admit a blank faced Tony. His eyes scanned the room before landing on Steve’s, only then shining with the depths of his emotion. Long strides brought him across the room and into his friend’s open arms. Burying his face into Steve’s chest, where no one could see him, Tony let his tears finally fall. His own face wet, Steve kissed the top of Tony’s head, moving his arms to catch the man as he shrunk. Bringing the kitten to his heart, he walked to the gathered team and sat down on the sofa. Thor, beside him, brought his arm around Steve, holding him tight as Loki gave Tony’s head a stroke and conjured blankets and pillows. The rest settled in around them, giving Tony a pet and Steve a squeeze, leaning against each other, comforting in their presence.

******

Peggy smiled at the scene. She was so proud of her boys. Just wait until she could tell Angie and Edwin...

(And Charles and Lucas and Fluffy and Whiskers and Tammy and Seamus and McFurry and Samson and Pretty and Asshole and Snuffles and Dolly and Lucy and Puck).

Notes:

Warnings: Charater death referenced for Howard, Maria, and Edwin Jarvis. Not detailed, but you get Tony's reaction to it. Same for Angie's death. Peggy's death is a little more detailed. This one is just as sad as it is sweet.

Thank you guys so much for reading! Sorry if it left you sad! Just in case, I will be posting a happier drabble after this one to cheer you back up :)

Pleasepleaseplease comment and let me know your thoughts!!

xoxoxoxox

Chapter 7: Code Red

Summary:

As promised happier drabble: Natasha is a BAMF with a family who loves her.

 

Now, it is a little dark in the middle, because she is recalling the Red Room, but the rest is sweet.

Generic placebo disclaimer: I own nothing.

Notes:

(Sorry if you saw this one in its previous posting. There was an error and I had to re-post)
Thank you all! Sorry about last chapter! This one is happier, but again, also a little sad. But the sad is in the past. It's really about the team and Tony in particular loving Natasha :)

Warnings inherent with Natasha's history. Reference to non-consensual experimentation, vague mention of possible rape, etc. Nothing in detail, but if it triggers you, just skip the part where she's in the hospital. All you need to know is that they did shit to her and now her period is irregular and incredibly painful.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The music stopped abruptly in Tony’s workshop.

 

“Code Red, Sir.”

 

Tony nodded his head sharply and began turning off various machines. “Save all and shut down, JARVIS.”

 

He walked swiftly to the elevator and watched blankly as the doors shut in front of him.

 

*****

 

The team had found out a few months prior the hard way, after they rushed Natasha to the hospital wing and waited the longest hour for her to wake up. The Red Room had done a multitude of horrible, cruel things to their teammate, but the Widow did not like talking about it and they had always respected her wishes. So it came as a complete surprise when she opened her eyes that day, took in the exhausted and distressed figures around her bed, sighed, and cleared her throat to tell a horrifying story.

 

The gist was this: on top of everything else the Red Room had done to the girls, they had also experimented with their reproductive organs. They did not want the girls to accidentally get pregnant on a mission, but neither did they want them to lose the ability altogether should it prove useful. They also sought to find ways to alter the gestation of the fetus, the DNA, and more.

 

Looking at the sheets in her lap, smoothing out the wrinkles with her hands, Natasha revealed that she had been made pregnant 97 times. And forced into a miscarriage an equal number.

 

Miraculously, the scientists did not completely destroy her reproductive organs, but they came close. And the Room still came back to haunt her, decades later. Her menstrual cycle is fucked to hell, she explained. Her period is completely irregular, entirely unpredictable, and excruciatingly painful. It only lasts for two or three days when it comes, but is a pure living hell when it does.

 

She could get rid of it all, she told them, but she refused to lose anything else to the Red Room. And as small of a chance as it was, the possibility remained that she could get pregnant and carry to term; she did not want a child at this time, nor did she know if she ever would, but she would not let them take away her choice. So, once or twice a year, she endured.

 

It was always horrendous, but this time she had not made it back to her room and had passed out from the pain in the common kitchen where JARVIS had witnessed it occur. He immediately called Thor, the nearest Avenger, to swiftly carry her to the medical personnel he had alerted concurrently.

 

She assured them that it was not normally this bad and she rarely lost consciousness due to it. The others were not comforted. But she demanded they not make a big deal out of it, and they agreed out of respect to her on the condition that she inform JARVIS, at least, when her period occurred so he could keep an eye on her.

 

As the team was shooed out of the room by the exhausted Widow, no one commented if they heard Tony give his A.I. a new protocol.

 

*****

 

The elevator door opened onto Natasha’s floor. Tony typed in his master code without an ounce of guilt and strode into his teammate's living room. A glare, broken by a grimace, was sent his way from a pile of pillows on the scarlet couch.

 

“What do you want, Stark?”

 

Tony ignored her and walked past into her kitchen. Locating and opening the woman’s hidden freezer, he extracted a pint of Blue Bell Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. Grabbing a spoon, a paper towel, and fixing a glass of Coke with ice, he asked JARVIS to que up Mr and Mrs Smith (one of Nat’s guilty pleasure flicks. She adored making fun of the so-called-assassins’ skills and secretly enjoyed the plot anyway). He returned to the living room and stopped by coffee table.

 

Handing her the drink - and staring at her until she took it - he retrieved a pill box from his pocket.

 

“Bruce, J, and I worked on them. Two every eight hours.”

 

When she did not extend her hand, Tony rolled his eyes and poked the pills between her lips. Giving a pain-laced snort, she licked the pills in and swallowed without bothering with her glass.

 

“Show off,” Tony mumbled.

 

Natasha gave a small smile and took a sip of Coke to appease him. Smiling back, Tony retrieved it from her when she was done and placed it within easy reach. He grabbed her feet from where they were scrunched up at her side and gently pulled them out straight, pulling her farther down into her pillows in the process. At her questioning look, he simply placed the ice cream into her arms and stabbed the spoon into it.

 

“Play, J,” he stated, before turning back to her with a smile, the opening credits of the film playing behind him. Then he shrunk. A second later, he hopped up onto the couch and crawled onto her stomach. Curling up into a ball, he began to purr.

 

He continued to purr throughout the film and into the next, the warmth and vibrations of his little body easing the cramps just a bit, his love and caring in the act helping even more.

 

Natasha smiled and laid her hand on his side. She still felt like shit, but she had family who loved her, and that was the best feeling in the world.

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Thank you so much for reading, and as always, comments make my week!!

Chapter 8: Catnip Fever

Summary:

Rhodey comes for a visit. Tony is ecstatic. And no, he is not purring.

Takes place after Tony Gets What He Wants
Reference to ch3 of LGWHW, JARVIS stating that he has earned his own income since 2003 and thus has been forward his ‘allowance’ funds from Tony to a robotics scholarship.

Generic Placebo Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Notes:

Hello all! How nice to see you again :) Check out the end notes for some news and drop me a word, if you please :)

Thank you all for reading and Oudemia-you know the drill ;)

Hope you enjoy!!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Lieutenant Colonel James Rhodes pushed open the doors to the Stark Tower lobby. Or Avengers Tower, whichever, James didn’t really have a preference. He knew Tony didn’t really mind the popular name for the building; that he continued to argue against it all these years was just for fun, the little brat.

 

“Hold the door, hold the door, hold the door!”

 

Pausing at the frantic call, he turned to spot one harried Dr. Bruce Banner completely buried in compostable bags hanging or strapped to seemingly every square inch of his body. James held open the door as asked, greeting his friend, “Hey, Bruce.”

 

Bruce squinted up at him, his glasses having slid precariously far down his nose, “James! How are you?”

 

James smiled back, “Very well, actually. I got a couple surprise days off and thought I’d come for a visit.”

 

“That’s great. Tony will be very excited to see you. He’s been moping around lately, complaining about how long it’s been since he’s seen you. Steve had to talk him out of flying the suit into wherever you were stationed. Loki offered to teleport you here just yesterday, and I don’t think I talked him out of that well enough.”

 

James laughed, “Well it’s a good thing I was able to come here out of my own volition before he gave in to the temptation. The chaos that would have ensued…” He shook his head, “Anyway, you look like you’re in a wrestling match with all those bags and they’re going to win any moment. You know, Hulking out might have been easier. Let me help.”

 

“Ah, you’re not wrong. I may have gotten a little excited at the market today. Hulk would have probably made my groceries into the world’s strangest smoothie, though. Or just eaten it all,” he huffed a laugh.

 

James dislodged number of bags from their entanglement with Bruce’s shoulders and hands. Bruce let out a relieved sigh and thanked him, wincing as he felt blood begin to return to his arms. The two started towards the Avenger’s private elevator, the doors opening in anticipation of their arrival.

 

“Thanks, J.”

 

“You are quite welcome, Dr. Banner. Though I do wish you would let me send along a car with you or just get your groceries delivered as do the rest of the team.”

 

Bruce grinned, “It is still a short walk, JARVIS, and I like picking it out myself. And I let you send the car during bad weather, don’t I?”

 

“Indeed. Though it is but a small compromise, I appreciate it none the less.” The two could hear the smile in his voice and grinned back. “And Colonel Rhodes, may I say what a pleasure it is to see you again. And what a relief, as well, for I was beginning to fear Sir would commit a felony to get you here.”

 

“It’s great to see you, too, J. I know you would keep Tony from kidnapping me.”

 

Bruce coughed, “Or at least from getting caught.”

 

The three silently agreed that that was the more likely scenario.

 

“So, what have you two been up to?” Rhodey asked.

 

JARVIS spoke up first. “Well, Colonel, I am currently in the process of picking which candidates to award my North American robotics scholarship to. I have increased the funds to award 1,000 students this year. Next month I will be awarding my South American ones. One of the students from last year’s pick in Japan recently created a robot that is able to ride a bicycle, that I am quite fond of, and another in Egypt is working on a surgery performing robot that I believe will be groundbreaking for the medical field.”

 

“That is great, J! All your little ducklings out there changing the world for the better.”

 

“While I wouldn’t call them ducklings, Colonel, I am quite proud of them.”

 

James smiled, “What about you, Bruce?”

 

“Oh, not much. I’ve been working on a water filtration system. It’s currently only feasible for small bodies of water, but I have hopes that I can tailor it to clean up oceans within the decade. And I have a new recipe to try for dinner tonight. I hope you will be here to join us.”

 

“That sounds wonderful, Bruce, I’d love to have a look at your designs. And I’ll be here for dinner, I plan to stay until Monday. I hope your recipe isn’t as spicy this time?” James shuddered, thinking back to the last meal of Bruce’s making that he ate. He couldn’t taste regular food for a week.

 

Bruce laughed, “No, no Indian food tonight, I promise. And if you can break away from Tony, stop by my lab sometime and I’ll show you my notes. I’d love another perspective.”

 

The doors dinged open unto the commonfloor. They carried their burdens toward the kitchen. Continuing their discussion over the mechanics of Bruce’s idea, they put away the food items - James emptying the bags and handing the items to Bruce to place in their respective locations.

 

“Hey JARVIS,” Rhodey called as they finished with the last bag, “Where is Tony at?”

 

“He is on his way to your location, Colonel. He was lounging in the living room with Master Laufeyson when he heard your laugh just now.”

 

No sooner had JARVIS finished his statement, did James hear a growing sound approach them.

 

“What is-?”

 

“MmmmmmrrraaaAAAAOOOOOOOOWWwwwwwwww!”

 

A small, black kitten tore around the corner and into the kitchen. James stared in shock as the creature launched itself towards him, reflexively catching the cat as it hit his chest. The kitten began purring at a volume far beyond its small frame, wriggling out of his hands to rub enthusiastically against his face and meowing like crazy.

 

Trying to avoid getting cat hair in his mouth, James turned to Bruce beside him questioningly, “Who got a cat? And why does it like me so much?”

 

Chuckling, Bruce told him, “Just wait until he calms down.”

 

“What?”

 

Bruce just smiled and shook his head. Meanwhile, the kitten continued to rub all over his face, avoiding his attempts to draw it away, and meowing loudly in his ears. He scrunched his nose up at the cat’s breath.

 

James noticed that the kitten’s purring seemed to be lowering in volume. He was wondering if that was what Bruce meant, when he suddenly found himself landing on the floor, a weight on his chest forcing the breath out of him.

 

Tony immediately scooted back to sit on his stomach instead, unceasing in his chatter, “-it’s been months, Rhodey Bear, months, with no more than a twenty minute video chat every couple weeks. I’ve been in Cuddle Bug withdraw, Baby, it’s been terrible. But you’re finally here. How long are you here? And it better not be for business, Sweetums, not after you abandoned me for so long-”

 

James put his hand over Tony’s mouth, ignoring his continued mumbling. “I missed you, too, Tones.” Tony withdrew the other’s hand to pout at him. James rolled his eyes and moved his hand to the back of his best friend’s head, pulling him down into a hug, “C’mere, ya big baby.”

 

Bruce chuckled from where he leaned against the counter, “You’re taking this awfully well.”

 

James gave a rueful smile in return, “I’ve known this brat since he was 14. I don’t think there’s anything he can do to surprise me anymore.”

 

Tony gave an indignant noise from where his face was pressed into James’s neck. James shushed him. Tony held him for a moment more before pushing himself up, “C’mon, Rhodey, I gotta show you all my new toys.”

 

He stood and offered a hand to help James stand, not letting go once he had. “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go,” he whined, pulling James towards the doorway.

 

Standing firmly in place, James looked over at Bruce, “I’ll see you at dinner, then, Bruce.”

 

“You better. Don’t let Tony talk you out of coming. ‘Because Science!’ is not a justifiable reason to skip a meal.” He stared pointedly at the man in question. Tony stuck his tongue out and gave another pull at James’s hand.

 

“I won’t,” James assured as he let himself be pulled out of the room. Tony began to ramble again as they stepped into the elevator.

 

“Hey, Tones?”

 

“...and that’s not even the best part, I found a - Yes, Sugarplum?”

 

“Are you purring?”

 

“Nope.” Tony denied, rumbling in contentment all the while.

 

“Really? ‘Cause I’m pretty sure-”

 

“Where was I? Oh, and then I gotta show you the upgrades I made for your suit, Catnip, you’re going to love ‘em ”

 

 

 

Notes:

News: I have the next fic in the 'verse outlined and will be starting it soon. This one will be centered around Steve, but there will be plenty of kitten! and human!Tony, don't you worry. I am finally going to be addressing something I hinted at in Steve's chapter of the first fic. Feel free to guess :)

As always, I would greatly appreciate a comment to let me know I'm not shouting into an empty room ;) A simple smilie face or 'hi' would be lovely and more would be amazing. Feel free to give suggestions for the 'verse. I've added a few already, and would love to add more.

Notes:

Many drabbles to come (and a few sequel and prequel fics as well)! Feel free to make requests or suggestions! And pleasepleaseplease leave me a comment and let me know what you think :)